You know what Iâd like to see? Shinichi being Shinichi again but failing miserably at it
I mean like a fic idea where the apoptoxin cure is found but Shinichi is just a total disaster at being grown-up again. Hereâs my idea, but of course there must be Kaito, so the setup would be something like this:
The Black Org is done with. Kaitoâs gunmen going down too is optional. In that case, Kaito still organizes heists bc theyâre fun, and a nice way to expose forgeries and his targetsâ dirty laundry. Haibara is close to the cure, so the number of tests increase and Conan gets to be Shinichi more often. Mostly he stays hidden and under observation, preparing to return to his former life. Haibara, for once spending more than a few hours in Shinichiâs presence, soon realizes that this. Was. Not. Going. To. Work.
Shinichi is terrible at being Shinichi. He keeps slipping into a high voice and waving his arms, not even to draw attention to himself but because thatâs what kids normally do in any interaction. He keeps doing a hundred different Conan-typical things, and on him it just looks weird. Anyone of his friends, heck his classmates, would see somethingâs up.
Also, Ran has not been told about the double identity debacle because frankly sheâll fucking eviscerate him if that ever comes to light. Haibara gently insinuates Shinichi is a dead man if he straight-up returns to living at the Kudo mansion and spends more than a week in Ranâs presence. Shinichi demands a second opinion. Agasa agrees. Hattori comes over and gives a thumbs down. His parents visit and give the death verdict in like 30 seconds flat.Â
Shinichi:Â âHow even-â
Yuusaku, hand on Shinichiâs arm like heâs talking to a slow child: âSon, youâre sitting on the counter swinging you legs and holding a cup with two hands. AÂ cup.â
So itâs decided Shinichi needs time to readjust, and a new place to do it at. In fact, thereâs a whole list of requirements:Â
a different school so his behavior can be passed off as quirks or a recovering head injury or something
a residence a bit away from Beika, they canât have Ran meeting with him every day
he needs someone to help him catch up in school
that someone should preferably be sharing the same workload and even class so they can keep an eye on Shinichi
+ if they can find someone who can be passed off as a cousin
+++ if that someone is quirky enough themselves that Shinichi will not rank as the biggest weirdo in class
+++++ if itâs someone who can understand the situation and keep secrets
Shinichiâs parents exchange a look and are like âwhatvs, might as wellâ and make some calls. Shinichiâs story is that heâs been working on a big case while also becoming a target, so he had to lay low and put his life on hold and just as they cracked the case open he received a head injury so heâs recovering at a cousinâs in Ekoda. Conan went back to America. Everyone in Beika more or less buys the story.
Predictably, it only takes one glance for Shinichi and Kaito to have realizations. Yuusaku and Yukiko are having the time of their life watching shit hit the fan. Eventually things calm down, Shinichi could already care less about arresting KID (heâs just in it for the chase), Kaito spends like 10 minutes in the presence of a calm Shinichi before he sees that oh boy this guy needs some serious behavior adjustments and reluctantly agrees to a housemate, while Shinichi questions what life choices led to Kaito KID, of all people, making sure he appears normal. I mean okay, maybe Kuroba hides his KID persona under a facade of a normal- nope, heâs just as extra. How is this his life.
Anyway, this was all the setup. What I wanna talk about is the shenanigans Shinichi gets into and the âquirksâ heâs gonna have. Here are some! (Feel free to add ideas, maybe youâll inspire me or we inspire a third party to write). Okay, here go the Conan things Shinichi keeps doing:
holds beverages with two hands
speaks in a high voice and simplifies his speech
slips and calls people his age nii-san or nee-chan
âI saw it on TV! âŠWait no, Hawai- no! Uhm.â
holds conversations with his whole body (swinging and waving hands, swinging back and forth on his feet, enthusiastic nods, smiles too wide, scuffs shoes, pouts, hand gestures, hand clapping)
once there was a thing on a high shelf and he kept hopping in place until Kaito asked what his problem is, Shinichi is mortified bc he was waiting on The Adult to notice his struggles and help
covers behind people to avoid attention, which looks ridiculous since heâs the same height as most of them
when thereâs a problem to solve, he keeps nudging other people instead of just providing the answer himself
fails a few exams at first bc heâs not used to doing so many complex academic questions in such a short time
his hand hurts from taking notes in class
combine a suddenly high-school workload with having to catch up on the missed material and heâs exhausted and napping all the time
the first time there was a roll call, he raised his hand and shouted âHaaaaiiii!â in a really high voice. Instant embarrassment, but also helped everyone in class establish that he is indeed suffering the effects of some head injury and they need to be Understanding and Considerate
trips sometimes bc long legs
keeps fidgeting with his legs when heâs sitting, not used to them touching the ground
on that note, sits cross-legged anywhere he can, including school chair
Shinichi leaning back in chairs and being surprised when his head isnât supported
Shinichi trying to hide how he went to sit knee first, like he was gonna climb the chair
the confusion on his face when he sat on some thin surface and it couldnât hold his weight. Kaito laughed for days
throws himself on couches and beds, breaks the bed support at least once
âShinichi, you have bruises on your butt.â âWell excuse me if I forgot, normally when I fall on it itâs not that high- donât laugh!â
Shinichi, butt sticking out of a vent where he was trying to reach a lost cat:Â âI may have miscalculated.â
tugs on peopleâs clothes when he wants to get their attention, also keeps leaning in to whisper in their ear jfc Shinichi
must not hold hands when leaving house, must not hold hands to keep together in large crowds
keeps running/skipping to places if heâs excited
generally has to stop from skipping when in a group bc he has long legs now, he can keep up by just walking
keeps squinting at everything, bc itâs not that easy to get rid of glasses even if you didnât have a prescription
on that note, eyes keep watering bc heâs gotten used to the UV protected lenses
eyes also water from the wind
also he always forgets to squint if heâs going through some shrubbery or cobwebs, and then suffers when it pokes him the eyes
he either keeps adjusting his nonexistent glasses or Kaito has to pluck them off his face bc he forgets he should not be wearing them
asks someone to hand him something already within reach
drags a chair over so he can stand on it while washing dishes
âShinichi, why did you put all your clothes on the bottom part of the wardrobe?â
âFix my skateboard, the battery goes out twice as fast.â âYes, because youâre twice as heavy.â
just out of nowhere starts (very badly) humming kidsâ songsÂ
gets ridiculously happy about his morning coffee, black no sugar
âYou need to eat more vegetables, Kaito.â âOh my god youâve been brainwashed.â
actually tries the puppy eyes on people. Sometimes it works.
may ask Kaito for waxing tips because itâs weird to see so much hair on his legs and living with Kaito just might be skewing his perception of normal
Shinichi, like, finding nothing weird about responding to a classmateâs plea through a bathroom door and going to retrieve her school bag with pads in it
has to be reminded to pay for himself when in company
âKudo-san, where are you going? Thatâs the kidsâ section. The menâs department is this way.â
âNo sir, that ticket price is for children up to 12.â
gradeschoolers love him and somehow he usurps Agasa as the Detective Boysâ favorite hangout person
somehow gets on great with Aoko and her 3rd person speech
Hakuba canât decide if heâs a genius or brain-damaged (probably both)
Akako canât decide if heâs a death god adept at concealing his magic or just the bitch of one
Ekoda and Beika police throw down at a KID heist at 3am over which days they get Shinichiâs detective skills. Beika wins custody battle on the grounds that Ekoda already has two mascots while they lost one
Ran is glad her friend is back, but she hopes he gets well soon because that head injury really messed him up
Sonoko dislikes Kaito on first sight, ever since he first tried to win her over with âsuch a cheap party trick, he thinks Iâll fall for just any magician"
Edit (i canât believe i didnât think of this sooner): his go-to defense at point zero is still kicking people in the shin. Kaito has a âno injuryâ policy but heâs considering making an exception just so Shinichi can feel the difference between a child kicking you in indignation versus a full grown football player
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