wнatѕ'er naмe @jae--bae - Tumblr Blog

Puppy girl in himi gauche

#puppygirl #my art #guache #guache paint #himi guache

Im avoiding live chat at work lmao

#sonic #sonic fandom #sonic fanart #myart #rogue the bat #furry adjacent #furry art #doodle #sketchbook

Wow I love venting on Tumblr where no one I know can find me

The problem with my cptsd right now and childhood is Im having a hard time making friends that dont have an underlying sting of sexual tension - maybe its my fault that I keep gravitating toward people who may only want to f--k me in their interest of interacting. Maybe thats a cognitive trap in my head that is alienating myself from people around me with good intentions.

Maybe I feel like I'm only worthy if I am wanted and the easiest way to be wanted is for someone to lust after me and I find safety in this exchange even though it ultimately leaves me disappointed and hurt.

I was exposed to explicit media and then had various traumatizing events take place between the ages of 5 and 13. I was never good at making friends and that could be the dysregulated home I came from, the suspected audhd and definitely the bipolar disorder.

I've gone through therapy on and off, I worked on the cptsd with EMDR which was the most helpful in tackling some of the chronic shame from CSA. I'm sure I could use more and it would be more helpful than venting on the Internet but finding a good therapist within the realms of insurance has been difficult.

Fluctuating between chronic shame and self awareness I suspect the problem maybe within me and mind and how I relate or dont relate to others.

It seems like a red flag to advertise "Hey, I'm looking to make friends that arent solely interested in the chance of pursuing s-xual relationships" because I imagine, for most people, that isn't a problem and comes naturally.

Anways, if you were unfortunate to read this all; thank you and I'm sorry

#cptsd #cptsd vent #CSA #SA #personal vent #bipolar 2 #bipolar disorder #sorry if this made it on your page im actually totally normal and not fucked up

nerdvolutionkurisu

Selkie

Selkies are know to give the upmost care to their seal pelts, one could even compare it to human's skin care routine!

Okay so you see the problem with the plate on the right is I started the middle by painting in the hills and then drew the lady crotch up right? But then I ran out of room for her head because I have bad visual planning skills and now shes just like that