Covenant Chapter 16
Summary: With the five year anniversary of the attack on New York approaching, Odin and Fury come to the agreement that an arranged marriage between Asgard and Earth would show good faith toward all future interactions. When Odin refuses Jane’s candidacy, Agent Coulson is tasked with finding a suitable wife for the prince of Asgard.
Pairing: Loki x OFC Claire Fisher
Word count: 10.5k (prepare drinks and snackies as always)
Chapter warnings: Arguing, Loki and Claire both being dense, therapy, discussions of past trauma/mental health struggles
Taglist: @lokisgoodgirl @gigglingtiggerv2 @icytrickster17 @mysteriouslyfriedjellyfish @lokislilkitten @justjoanne242 @amlocked @ddmariegirl @mags-04-blog @sharris8 @meepycheep @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @the-fantasy-loving-angel @jaidenhawke @smolvenger @ladymischief11 @huntress-artemiss
Please let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist! Thanks for coming along on this journey with me! Buckle up gang :D
Read it on AO3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51197938/chapters/223509171
Raucous laughter floated on the still air like puffs of dandelions as the cloaked figure traversed the narrow dark alleys toward the pleasure house. Buildings loomed overhead, dark and silent like mountains, barely touched by the fingers of moonlight. Clusters of drunkards roamed, stinking of sweat and booze, the patrolling Einherjar keeping them in line as they stumbled their separate ways back to their families. The journey took longer than hoped, and fingers itched with impatience as the figure hid from the sharp eyes of Einherjar as they passed by.
The Einherjar passed by, and the figure took up its path once more. Slipping through a crowd of drunks, the figure turned a corner and came upon the pleasure house at last. Large and well-lit, all manner of debauched behavior went on behind those doors. But after tonight, it would be as stone silent as the buildings around it.
The figure took the stone steps up to the door, following the flow of eager men seeking nubile companions who couldn’t say no.
“Hold on, stranger,” a gruff muscly man stopped the figure at the door. “What’s your business here?”
“My business.” the figure said shortly, with a voice deep and burred like a tumbleweed.
“I need you to take off your hood.”
“You want my money or not?” the figure demanded, pinning the man with a steely gaze. The man took his job seriously- it was his job both to protect the women working as well as the peace of the patrons inside. Money was money, but something about this stranger made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. Heavily cloaked, with the lower part of their face covered, rich fabric...likely someone from the palace. The pleasure house enjoyed a protected seat of commerce; the last thing it needed was to be called under scrutiny because he refused a servant of the crown some privacy.
“Yes, of course. Right this way,” the man gestured for the figure to enter the opulent sitting room. “We’ll take excellent care of you.” The figure followed the indicated path to the sitting room, placing their back against the wall in the corner.
The room was crowded and overheated, the air thick with the scent of alcohol and sex as men made fools of themselves drooling over the women as they wove their way through the room. Men would reach out and drag women into their laps with loud bellows of laughter, claiming their victim. The women, whose livelihoods depended on pleasing their customers, did their best to hide the revulsion and resignation on their faces. The figure watched the scene unfold from the corner, fury building in their gut as they waited for the right time to strike.
“Hello you, what are you doing all alone in the corner?” a feminine voice purred, sidling up to the figure in the corner. “Don’t you want some company?” she asked, hands drifting to the figures middle and roaming up the expanse of the figures chest.
“No,” the figure grabbed the woman’s wrists before she roamed too far. “Do you like it here?”
“Of course I do,” the woman scoffed. “I have a safe place to sleep and food...and companionship.” she added flirtatiously. “What’s the matter, am I not your type?”
“Tell me the truth.” the figure demanded, grip tightening on the woman’s wrists.
“You’re hurting me,” the woman protested. The figure released her immediately, and she rubbed her wrists to soothe the ache. “What’s your problem?” she asked angrily.
“You need to leave,” the figure warned. “Just walk out the door, and don’t come back.”
“I can’t leave, idiot. What kind of game-” the figure slapped a hand over the woman’s mouth, pinning her against the wall in the breadth of a second.
“If you can’t leave, then find a locked room and get inside,” the figure said firmly, blue eyes burning into the woman’s intensely. “I don’t want to hurt you or anyone else who works here. Do you understand?” the woman nodded mutely, cold sweat prickly at her skin as the figure let her go. “Move!”
At some silent signal from the woman, a number of other women circulating in the room vanished up a hidden stairway in the back. The men, so besotted with their captive audiences, barely noticed what was happening beyond the bosoms they’d shoved their faces into.
Blood began to boil, and fingers curled into fists trembling with rage.
Olivia Benson, give me strength.
The figure whipped off their cloak, throwing it over a man passing by. The man shouted and swung his beefy arms, but the figure jerked him roughly, throwing him off balance and sending him hurtling toward the wall.
Blinded by the cloak, the man had no way of seeing his crash course with the candelabra or gilt mirror, and he slammed into both with a loud crash. The mirror shattered in a shower of silver glass, tearing at the cloak and the mans skin, and the candles set the lush drapery and cloak ablaze when knocked to the ground.
Stunned out of their stupor, the other men in the room jumped to their feet at the sudden uproar. Women found themselves dropped onto the ground, coughing and choking on the already smoky air.
“Run! Get out!” the figure shouted, pulling knives from their belt to fight the men who’d already starting circling like sharks. One of the women grabbed two of the others by the hand, pulling them up the hidden stairs.
One man, tall and broad shouldered, attacked with massive fists. The figure side stepped the attack, burying a knife in the mans ribs and making him crumble to the floor. The figure drew another knife from their belt as two men attacked, slashing easily through cloth and flesh and tissue and sending both men to their knees as they screamed in agony. A fourth man took the figure by surprise and managed to grab the cloth covering their face, pulling it free with a roar.
“Your Highness?” the man gaped at the princess in awe and horror. Hair mussed, eyes red from the smoke and mouth set in stone, the knife wielding woman in front of him was a far cry from the image the palace presented. The man gurgled as a knife was shoved into his throat. He crumbled to the floor, trying to ask for help through the heavy flow of blood escaping between his trembling fingers.
The princess wrenched the face covering from his grip, delivering a rib-crushing kick to his side before tying the mask back in place. His vision grew dim as she watched his movements slow, and the last thing he saw before his vision went dark was the princess royal leaving the room full of bodies.
The bar area was in utter disarray. The fire was rapidly spreading and people were scrambling for the exits. Undeterred, Claire continued with her plan. Stools broke over backs, glasses shattered into eyes, and knives slashed throats as she worked her way through the burning building. Upstairs, she found the working women hiding in one of the workers bedrooms. Covered in blood and gore as she was, the women cowered from her.
“I’m not here to hurt you. I’m gonna help you escape,” Claire sheathed her knives as she entered the sparsely decorated room. The fire had yet to spread upstairs, though the smoke had risen and was making the air difficult to breathe. “C’mon, move!” she urged the women as she ripped sheets from the bed.
“What do we do?” one of the women asked. Her blonde hair had fallen from its glamorous up-do, the exposed skin on her chest streaked with soot from the fire.
“Help me tie these into a ladder,” Claire said urgently. The air was shimmery, growing heat from the fire below making them all damp with sweat. Groans were emanating from the burning building around them, orange and red flames licking up the walls like sinister fingers. “Come on, come on!” Together the women tied the bedding into a ladder, throwing it out the nearest window after Claire kicked out the glass. Claire tied the end around the bed frame, making sure it was secure with a hard tug. “Come on, we gotta go!”
“We’re not allowed out!” one of the younger girls said piteously, her chin trembling as tears streaked down her face. Out in the streets, overlapping men’s voices shouted orders as they tried to contain the hungry flames.
“Do you want to die in here?!” Claire shouted. “GO NOW!”
“Go, go!” the women hustled to the window, helping each other find hand holds in the fabric. The fire inched closer, swallowing up the hallway outside the room. The women climbed down: one, two, three, four. The heat was blistering, stinging Claire’s face and eyes. Her lungs burned and her eyes watered, her body trembling with hacking coughs as she held the bed sheets steady for the women to climb down.
Five, six. Two to go. Claire adjusted her grip on the sheet-rope, leaning back with all her weight to give them as much stability as possible.
“Keep going!” she urged, heels digging into the groaning floor as the women climbed out the window.
Flames splintered the door to the room, spilling into the room with a loud roar. The women screamed, wincing back from the encroaching danger and pulling Claire off balance. The roof groaned ominously overhead, and Claire knew it was time to get out.
“You’re gonna have to jump!” Claire tied the sheet rope onto the nearest bed, drawing back with a shriek as a beam fell in front of her. “Go, go!” Claire followed the women out onto the rope, inching down not nearly fast enough. The group of women had reached the balcony below their bed chamber, and were helping each other find footholds to climb down the side of the building. An ominous groan sounded from the platform just as Claire reached it, and the woman beside her disappeared in a belch of fire into the scorched remains of the ground floor. “JUMP NOW!” Claire urged the remaining women toward the railing. The two youngest clasped hands before jumping together. Claire vaulted over the side of the building, rolling onto the dirty street beside the cluster of terrified women. Her lungs burned and her vision swam, her ears tuned to the sounds around them.
“Are you okay?” one of the women asked, bending to help Claire to her feet.
“I’m fine, you need to go,” Claire urged her. “If you stay here, they’ll just take you to another pleasure house. GO!”
“Come on,” the woman urged the others, grabbing them by the hand. She glanced back at the crumbling pleasure house before turning her gaze to Claire. “Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it,” Claire coughed as another part of the building crumbled behind them. “Get out of here.”
“Come this way,” the woman tugged at Claire’s sleeve, pulling her along the alley into the sweet clutches of darkness as the women left the inferno behind. They walked hurriedly in silence, eyes darting back toward the smoldering building whenever a loud crash was heard. The building was nothing but ruins now, a pile of smoking embers and ash, and panicked shouts from those attempting to contain the blaze echoed along the streets. “You should be able to get back to the palace if you follow that street.”
Claire stopped cold, her hand flying to her face only to find it bare. Her cowl must have fallen off during their escape.
“Oops,” she said sheepishly. “Uh...thanks.”
“Go before they find you. We won’t say anything. You saved our lives.”
“I mean I also started the fire…” Claire rubbed the back of her neck anxiously. “Will you be okay?”
“We’ll manage,” the woman said decisively as she hugged one of the younger girls to her side. “Anything is better than that place.” Claire nodded. She could understand that.
“Best of luck to you.”
“And to you.” Claire parted ways with the women, winding her way through the streets back to the palace.
~~~~
Claire was stripping her weapons from her clothing when Ragna arrived with a tray from the kitchen. She paused in the doorway to Claire’s bed chamber, eyes agog.
“What happened?!” she gasped as she took in Claire’s disheveled appearance.
“Don’t ask,” Claire rasped, stripping off her clothing as she walked toward her bathroom. “I’ll be in the bath.”
The next day
Loki was having a terrible day. Somehow, everything he’d attempted had gone wrong in some way. The seam on his trouser leg had split spontaneously during his morning meeting, and a pebble had manifested in his boot seemingly from nowhere when he’d gotten up to make his exit. His cape had caught in a doorway, leading him to fall flat on his back in the hallway, surrounded by a cascade of parchment scrolls as they fell around him.
He’d hoped the midday meal would offer a respite from the odd goings-on and allow him to brush off his foul mood, but his chair had collapsed the moment he’d sat down to dine. Naturally, his meal had followed him to the floor, leading to Loki taking his second bath of the day.
Loki did not have days like this. Loki took great care to insure his chambers and everything within was well cared for. Loki was inundated with buffoonery from early morn until the sun went down (and often even after that)- but that was all Thor’s doing. This was different. This felt like-
“Witchcraft.” he muttered to himself, honed senses finally noticing the faint glamour surrounding his person. There was only one person foolish enough to do such a thing.
~~~~
Claire groaned when the knock sounded on her door. She just wanted to read in peace, damn it! Knowing things would only be worse if she ignored it, she reluctantly called out,
“Come in!”
Instead of a Ragna or staff person like she’d expected, an angry Loki walked in.
“Where is it?” he demanded without preamble.
“Can you be more specific?” Claire reopened her book, wiggling deeper into the couch cushions. “If you’re looking for my will to live, it left a long time ago.”
“Whatever magical drudgery you cooked up,” Loki snapped. Claire’s head shot up, her eyes alight with alarm. “So you did do something!”
“Whatever I may or may not have done, you deserved,” Claire replied airily, pointedly turning back to her book. “And clearly you haven’t done anything to fix it, or it would have gone away.”
“Just tell me where it is; I am tired of dealing with this-”
“The only way to fix it is for you to get your head out of your ass.”
“I swear to Odin, I will destroy everything in these rooms-”
“What a brilliant idea,” Claire said flatly, her face still obscured by the book in her hands. “Can’t figure it out? Just break stuff.”
“It must be here somewhere.”
“Hey, you wanna destroy all this expensive furniture, be my guest! I didn’t pay for it,” Claire scoffed. “I could have sworn I married the smart brother,” Loki paused, turning her words over in his mind. With a grin on his face, he moved toward her bedchamber. “Where are you going?”
“It’s as you said,” he explained as she got up to follow him. He was on the right track, judging by her nervous footsteps. “Many of the things in these rooms are not yours. You have made it clear you don’t feel at home here-”
“Oh my god, you’re a genius.” Claire added sarcastically.
“Thank you, darling, I know,” Loki replied, eyes scanning her bedchamber. They settled on her armoire, a smug smirk turning up the corners of his mouth. “Ah.”
Claire slid in front of the armoire just before he could open it.
“It’s not polite to go through someone’s things.”
“It’s also impolite to hex someone,” Loki gave her a fake smile. “Step aside.”
“No can do.” Claire said, beaming a fake smile of her own.
“Woman-” Loki huffed. “I haven’t the time to deal with this nonsense; move or be moved.” Claire crossed her arms, shoulders squared against the double doors of the armoire.
“Move me then.”
Not one to shirk from a challenge, Loki stepped forward to grab Claire by the waist. Instead, he cried out in pain when Claire flicked his nose. He gaped at her before he tried again, only to be forced back a second time when Claire stomped on his foot. A third lunge and he nearly received a punch to the throat.
“You’re being very difficult.” he complained.
“I’m very good at that.” Loki tried to topple her by hooking a foot around her ankle, but Claire simply shifted her weight with his and suddenly Loki found himself across the room.
“You threw me!”
“You’re trying to burgle me!”
“What’s a bit of theft between spouses?” Loki asked innocently as he picked himself off the floor. “Are you sure I can’t persuade you-”
“Not a snowball’s chance in hell,” Claire chuckled, her loose hair whipping about as she shook her head. “I cordially invite you to go fuck yourself.”
“Must you be crass-”
“Actually, here’s a question- would you blow Fandral if it meant saving everyone in the universe?” Loki’s lip curled in disgust.
“Would you?”
“Don’t you put that evil on me, Ricky Bobby,” Claire shuddered. “Get out.”
“I will have that charm!” Loki fumed, even as he stalked out. He would have to come back another time.
“No you won’t. Thanks for visiting!” Claire waved him out the door with a ridiculous amount of cheer.
~~~~
Sam Wilson wondered, not for the first time, who he’d pissed off to get this detail. Playing therapist to Captain America lent him a glowing recommendation, and apparently S.H.I.E.L.D. had thought he’d fit the bill. Despite his best efforts, Claire and Loki been glaring at him practically since they arrived. They’d been sequestered for at the better part of an hour, and loathe as they were to talk to each other, Claire and Loki were even less inclined to talk to their new S.H.I.E.L.D. appointed marriage counselor.
The brief rundown he’d gotten gave him a little insight, but the second the pair had clocked him, something odd had happened. With a brief exchange of glances the pair had fallen into lockstep, both refusing to say so much as a syllable.
“Are we just gonna sit here and stare at each other?” Sam asked in amusement. “Not that you both don’t have pretty eyes, but there are other ways I’d prefer to spend my time.”
“Likewise.” Loki growled.
“Ha, you talked!” Sam laughed. “I win!” Claire rolled her eyes. “Guys, this doesn’t have to be life or death. I’m just trying to get you to talk with me.”
“I’m not interested in talking.” Claire huffed.
“Would you prefer to fist fight this handsome fella instead?”
“Are you trying to flirt with us?”
“I’m just trying to get some kind of response,” Sam shrugged. “You’ve been stonewalling me for close to an hour. Clearly none of us are going to lose this little standoff, so-” Sam flipped to an earlier page in his notebook to his exhaustive notes. “Let’s see where we stand. You-” he pointed at Claire. “Threatened to stab Loki in the face, and you-” his finger found Loki. “Nearly choked your wife to death. Clearly, something has gone very wrong here because your support staff had a lot to say about your honeymoon. Who wants to go first and explain where the train went off the tracks?”
“Hold up, why am I on trial? This little experiment was going great until Frosty here got a wild hair up his ass-”
“You think to mock me again?” Loki scoffed. “Have you no better weapons in your meager arsenal?”
“Eat me, Olaf. All I did was threaten your pretty face; you on the other hand, have almost killed me- TWICE!”
“HA!” Loki scoffed. Unseen by the couple, their therapist had begun writing on the notepad in his lap. “The incident with the horse was regrettable, and I apologized. I did not know you had a paralyzing fear of horses-”
“I literally told you one threw me-”
“Again, I said I was sorry. And you responded by decorating my chambers and my person with crude glitter. Those were child’s play! Mere tricks! But you started that incident- you provoked me by mocking my heritage!”
“To get your attention! I asked you for an opinion and you-”
“SO YOU ADMIT IT!” Loki thundered, shooting to his feet.
“Okay, that’s enough,” Sam interjected. “Sit down, man.”
“I will sit when I please,” Loki said haughtily, pointedly moving away from the seat he’d abandoned. Behind him, Claire rolled her eyes. “Do not mock me, woman!”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Claire huffed,folding one leg over the other. “You’re imagining things as usual.”
“I imagine nothing!” Loki snarled, rounding on Claire with all the venom of a wild animal. “You and that damned oaf are up to something, but it stops now, do you hear me?!”
“Oh here we go again,” Claire rubbed at her temples in exhaustion. “Thor and I are not “up to” anything, and I’m getting really fucking tired of you throwing wild accusations in my face.”
“Wild?!” Loki scoffed. “I have seen it, with my own eyes! Thor had the audacity to all but say he would make a better husband to you than I am, and you are doing nothing to dissuade him!”
“From what?! Thor had the decency to check on me because he noticed I’m miserable; something you have either failed to notice or completely ignored!” Claire shouted, jumping to her feet so fast her chair smacked loudly on the stone floor.
Sam gave the couple a few moments to shout at each other as he wrote Thor’s name in his notes and underlined it. As the couple started to shove each other, he circled it several times.
“Okay, that’s enough!” he shouted over the bickering couple. “Both of you, back in your corners.”
“This is a farce and I refuse to participate any further!” Loki shouted.
“Yeah, just go back to ignoring everything like always!”
“We’re never going to get anywhere if you’re not willing to talk-” Sam said calmly as he picked up the fallen chair.
“That would require His Majesty to actually communicate!” Claire shouted. “In case you haven’t noticed, I seem to be the only one who ever acknowledges their feelings, and that’s fucking saying something!”
“ENOUGH!” Loki screamed. “I will not be blamed-”
“IT’S YOUR FAULT!” Claire kicked the stately chairs out from between them. “EVERYTHING WAS GREAT UNTIL WE CAME BACK HERE!”
“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Sam bellowed, stepping in between the bickering couple. “Shouting at each other isn’t gonna solve a damn thing! You, in that corner; you, in that corner,” he gave them both a push in opposite directions to keep them apart. “Okay, we’re gonna try something different.”
“Can’t wait.” Claire snapped. Loki growled as he stalked to his designated corner.
“Alright, I want both of you to pick a word to describe the other-a nice one!” Sam stopped the pair before either could speak. “Ladies first. Something nice, anything.”
“Not on your life, shrink.”
“You don’t trust therapists, do you?” Sam asked. “Your uncle told me you’d probably be hostile. How many times you been in?” That caught Loki’s attention. He hadn’t known Claire had been incarcerated.
“Enough.”
“I’m not here to lock either of you up. You’ve already got a life sentence,” Sam said gently. “My job is to teach you skills to improve your relationship so you can work together and maybe, get back to being happy.”
“Buddy you must be a fucking miracle worker because I’m not convinced it’s possible-” Loki tutted from his corner.
“Is that why you’ve ignored the messages I’ve sent? Why you’re seemingly set on having children even though you were the one who suggested we wait?”
“It’s not fun being ignored, is it?” Claire asked heatedly. “I have been trying to get you to tell me what your problem is for weeks, and all you’ve done is sandbag me! Between Yrsa constantly offering me sugar cubes and your mom nagging me to make peace, I’m at my wits end. So yes, having a baby seems like the quickest way to make things change.”
“Where would you go? Where would you live?”
“Why do you care? You’d have your freedom and a shiny new baby, and you’ll get exactly what you want, which is to never see me again,” Claire spat. “I’ve had enough therapy for today.” Sam took a step aside to give her space as she made her exit.
~~~~
Claire groaned as she stretched her back, eyes pinched shut against the blinding light of the sun. It was another beautiful day in Asgard, the cobblestone streets awash in the blazing afternoon sun. The street was busy, not just with people passing by, but the table Claire stood behind had also drawn a small crowd of hjemlos from the shadows.
She’s seen neither hide nor tail of Loki since their disastrous first counseling session. Granted, it had only been two days, and she’d kept herself busy putting together the food baskets and giving them out. If the past two days were any indication, Claire would need to start planning for bigger crowds. Clearly, this was a bigger problem than she’d thought.
“Your Highness?” a prim voice sounded from the mouth of the alley. Claire sighed to herself, knowing full well she would see Yrsa when she turned. “What in Odin’s name are you doing?”
“What does it look like I’m doing?” Claire asked sharply, hefting the food items in her hands for emphasis. “I’m giving food to people in need. Have you come to help?”
“It is illegal to feed the hjemlos!” Yrsa screeched.
“Legality does not equal morality.” Claire shot back.
“The Allfather will hear of this- you are a princess of Asgard! You should not be near these-” Yrsa sneered at the man closest to them, who wilted in the face of her scorn. “People.”
“Don’t be rude,” Claire hissed at her, handing the man a parcel of food. “I’m so sorry about her. Please, enjoy your food.” The man bowed and darted away, keeping his head low as he fled. Yrsa scoffed her disgust.
“They will never stop begging now.”
“Newsflash Yrsa, people need to eat every day,” Claire snapped. “Either make yourself useful or leave.” Yrsa’s face screwed up into an ugly grimace.
“Surely a princess of Asgard has more important matters to focus on,” she scoffed. “Perhaps you could bless the realm with an heir instead of food stuffs?” Yrsa laughed at her own joke before sauntering off, leaving Claire blissfully able to focus on the people who actually needed her.
~~~~
Claire’s good fortune of dodging Sam Wilson and his annoying questions ran out later that afternoon, when he spotted her in the library. The slender man made a beeline through the tall shelves, skillfully cutting off her attempt to dart down a different aisle.
“You wouldn’t be trying to escape, would you?” he asked, a knowing grin curving his attractive features.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Claire replied, feigning interest in a nearby tome. “I happened to be looking for this book.” Sam scrutinized the spine, his eyes darting from the indecipherable squiggles to Claire’s face with suspicion.
“Yeah? What’s it about?” he pressed. “No seriously, I can’t read the language here.”
“It’s a record of diplomatic history between Asgard and Alfheim. Will you leave me alone now?” Claire huffed, pulling one of the books off the shelf.
“No can do. I’m under strict orders to help you out by any means necessary,” Sam had the decency to look apologetic. Claire scoffed, arms slotting together as she squared off with him. “Look, I get it. Feelings are not your forte. I’m not asking for an all access pass to your brain, I just wanna help make things better for you here.”
“Who are you, Jesus of Nazareth?” Claire muttered as she thumbed through the book. “It’ll take a miracle, maybe ten miracles, to improve things.”
“Name one thing that would help you,” Sam prompted. At Claire’s surprised look, he smiled softly. “No one’s asked you that, have they?”
“That would require considering me to be a person with feelings, so no,” Claire said morosely. “I’m just a walking womb to these people.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. That’s gotta be dehumanizing,” Sam frowned. “Even Loki?”
“No, Loki never treated me like that,” Claire shook her head, sorrow scrunching up her nose. “I thought he was different.”
“Sometimes people aren’t who we think they are. It’s okay to be sad about that; it’s a loss to process like any other.”
“It’s not a loss, it’s...I don’t know what it is,” Claire sighed, turning away from Sam to leave the aisle. “We really were happy, you know. Before now, anyway.”
“So what changed?” Sam asked, pulling a chair out for Claire to sit. “Walk me through it.”
“There’s nothing to walk you through; I genuinely don’t know what changed. There’s something I’m missing and Loki refuses to talk to me about whatever it is,” Claire shrugged, fingers fidgeting with the spine of her book. “Things were rocky at first, but we worked through it. We were happy when we got married. Our honeymoon was amazing. And then we came back, and...Loki said he wanted to get a head start on the work he’d missed and went to his office, I went to bed, and next thing I know Loki woke me up shouting about me tricking him.”
“Just like that?”
“Yeah, I don’t know what set him off, but I’d never seen him like that. He’s usually pretty buttoned up, you know? This place is repressive as hell; I can’t imagine growing up here and suppressing your feelings all the time.” Claire shuddered at the thought.
“I can’t imagine leaving your whole life behind to marry a stranger,” Sam countered. “But clearly at the beginning you found a way to make it work. Tell me about that.”
“Why?” Claire asked, pulling away from Sam with hackles raised. “You tricked me.”
“No tricks, I promise,” Sam said gently. “But I can’t solve a puzzle without all the pieces.”
“You’re right, sorry,” Claire’s anger deflated. “This place is like Game of Thrones and everyone has an ulterior motive. And no offense, but I really don’t trust shrinks.”
“None taken,” Sam smiled. “I thought it would be easier to talk to you and Loki individually after that disaster a few days ago. Tensions are clearly too high for joint sessions right now, but maybe after a few solo sessions we can try again.”
“Right,” Claire snorted. “Come see me when pigs fly.”
“Wait,” Sam stopped her from getting up. “Do you even want to fix this?”
“What’s your prognosis?”
“My opinion doesn’t matter if you want out,” Sam shook his head. “I know it’s a big deal, but your feelings matter. If you want an out, I will help you find one.”
“Even if it means-”
“Yeah I know what it means,” Sam huffed. “But you are not a sacrificial lamb sent here to suffer so everyone on Earth can be safe. So I will help you fix your relationship, if that’s what you want, but I’ll say it again. You say the word, and I’ll help you leave. Enjoy your book.” Sam rapped his knuckles on the table and left Claire to her thoughts.
~~~~
The following day, with annoyance simmering in his veins, Loki made his way to meet Sam for their first private session.
“Hey man, c’mon in,” Sam greeted him politely as Loki stepped inside the sitting room. Sam was rearranging furniture on the sunlit balcony. “I thought we could sit out here, get some fresh air.”
“Is this meant to put me more at ease?”
“That depends, is it working?” Sam grinned. “Maybe there’s somewhere else you’d rather be.” Loki let his eyes drift over the landscape below. The afternoon sun was kissing the mountain peaks, slanted rays casting long shadows over the marketplace and houses in the city below, and Loki idly wondered how Claire’s project with the hjemlos was progressing.
“That is hardly your concern,” he said to Sam, tucking away the thought of Claire and what she was doing. He used to hear gossip of her activities, but he’d heard nary a peep for several days. “Well? I assume you have some banality to while away our time.” Sam shrugged, settling gracefully into one of the plush seats.
“What do you wanna talk about?”
“Is this a social call?” Loki asked. “Strange. I thought this to be an odd punishment contrived by feeble minded fools.”
“Think what you want, but I am here to help.” Loki scoffed at that, crossing armor clad arms elegantly across his chest.
“I sincerely doubt it is possible,” he said, refusing to look in Sam’s direction. “I fear the damage is done.”
“What makes you say that?”
“You were in the room during our first session, were you not?” Loki balked. “I knew Claire was furious, but I hadn’t thought…” he trailed off, mired in his maudlin thoughts.
“Something on your mind?” Sam prompted when he saw the crestfallen look on Loki’s face. The dark gods brows furrowed, clearly torn between sinking into despair or storming off in search of his furious wife.
“Claire seems desperate to fulfill our duty and leave. She claimed that I do not wish to see her. Why would she think such things? I do not want her to leave.”
“Have you told her that? Because-”
“She will not give me the chance!” Loki cried. “I have extended invitation after invitation to discuss the matter privately, but she refuses to even glance at anything I send to her!”
“Have you tried actually talking to her?”
“Talk,” Loki balked. “Putting the two of us in a room and asking us to talk is like pitting two rutting bilgeshnipe against each other!”
“Which is why I’m here,” Sam nodded. “You are two different people from two different backgrounds and upbringings. There are difficulties with any relationship-”
“Difficulties,” Loki scoffed. “Would difficulties include antagonizing each other to the point of madness? Coming to blows?” he worried his lower lip between his teeth. “She is right, we used to be able to communicate quite well.” he added with a sigh.
“Dude, just tell her that. Women love being told they’re right.”
“Agreeing for the sake of agreeing will not change anything-”
“There’s no instant fix for this, man. It’s a process, that both of you have to work on. Like anything worth having, it’s going to take time and effort,” Loki frowned, the cogs in his mind turning rapidly. “Claire and I talked a little earlier today. She told me you guys started off on the wrong foot but you were able to talk and get on the same page. Why don’t you tell me about that?”
“What is there to tell?” Loki asked absently, settling back in his seat as a cool breeze ruffled his hair. “The fault is mine, and she is so stubborn,” he smiled fondly. “We were not allowed to be alone together before we wed but we...talked. We played games. Flirted.”
“That sounds nice.”
“We found ways to be together, to learn each other,” Loki added. He blanched, a sudden wave of dread settling over him. “This could have harsh ramifications if that knowledge came out. You will say nothing.”
“Of course,” Sam promised. “What you say is private. That’s how therapy works.”
“The damage to Claire’s reputation is a risk I will not take,” Loki stressed. “Not a word, Son of Wil.”
“I won’t tell anyone anything,” Sam drew an X over his heart. “Cross my heart and hope to die.” Loki looked at him oddly, his eyes squinted with suspicion.
“This is another odd Midgardian expression, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, man,” Sam laughed. “It is. So...you don’t seem that worried about your reputation.”
“Why should I be?” Loki asked, as though Sam should already know this. “My reputation is colored beyond salvation.”
“Why do you say that?” Sam asked. Loki gave him a droll look, the silence between them beginning to stretch like molten cheese.
“Very well, I shall divulge my list of sins,” Loki sighed heavily. “There is of course, the obvious, the attack on your planet which led to this mockery of a Shakespearean play. I am a multitude of wrongs: forever scorned, untrusted, the second son, the spare prince, the one who is never enough no matter how hard I try. The worst of all my sins, Son of Wil, is that I am not Thor.”
“And you think that matters to Claire?”
“How could it not?” Loki scoffed. “No respectable woman would willingly tie herself to me.”
“Why do you think that?” Sam asked.
“All evidence points to thus,” Loki frowned. “Yrsa would not have me, and now Claire all but refuses to acknowledge my existence.”
“Hold up, is Yrsa the crazy chick who keeps neighing at Claire?” Sam asked.
“Another failing of mine,” Loki sighed as he rubbed his temples. “Our lack of unity has given the rumor mongers a lot to discuss, at Claire’s expense.”
“Let’s table that for a minute, I wanna circle back to your previous point. Do you think Claire doesn’t respect herself?”
“What an odd question,” Loki huffed. “She is perhaps the most self-assured woman I have ever met. She voices her opinions without fear of reprisal. I don’t see how she could do those things if she did not respect herself.”
“Okay, so we’ve established Claire has self-respect. She married you of her own accord, right? No one forced her to sign up for this?”
“That is my understanding...why?”
“Bear with me,” Sam pleaded. “So we’ve established that Claire is an independent woman who knows herself and would not do something she did not want to. You said that no woman who meets those criteria wouldn’t ‘tie herself to you willingly’. But Claire did. What do you think that means?”
“I cannot possibly begin to know what that woman thinks.”
“Do you think maybe it means she sees something in you? Something good?” Sam asked. “Because I don’t know Claire very well. But from what I’m learning, I don’t think she would marry a guy she thinks is ‘a multitude of wrongs’, as you put it. Do you?”
“I...”
“See, sometimes we get fixated on how we perceive things to be instead of focusing on what they actually are,” Sam said. “So sometimes we need to take a step back and reexamine our perception. Now that we’ve talked it through, do you think differently?” Loki regarded the mortal man for a moment.
Loki knew Claire was self-respecting like he knew the sun would rise in the morning. At no point had he seen evidence of her being forced to play along with this venture they found themselves in. If both things were true, perhaps Sam had a point.
How could he reconcile that, knowing she had clandestine designs for him?
Perhaps there were no clandestine designs. Perhaps his mother was right, and he had latched onto the idea of betrayal because it was easier for him to accept that betrayal than the idea that Claire might truthfully, genuinely love him.
And rather than confront the ugliness in himself, he had snapped at Claire like a wild animal. Claire, who played games with him and made him laugh, and oh gods, how could he have been such a fool? All she’d wanted was him, and he drove her away.
“I can tell you need some time to process, so take the night, and come back tomorrow ready to work.” Loki vaguely registered Sam’s voice as he got to his feet and left the balcony.
~~~~
The following morning at breakfast, Loki arrived later than usual, looking exhausted as he joined Claire at their table.
“Good morning.” he offered coolly.
“Good morning,” Claire replied. “Trouble sleeping?”
“Yes, actually,” Loki admitted as a servant delivered a platter of food for him. “Thank you,” he muttered, waiting until she had filled his goblet and retreated before he turned to Claire. “I have had a great number of things on my mind, and it was difficult to rest. Could I ask you a question?”
“Technically you just did,” Claire replied, setting her fork down to turn toward him. “What’s on your mind?”
“Your exchange with Sam at our first session. You indicated you have been incarcerated in the past? That was not something I was aware of.”
“Not in the way you’re thinking,” Claire shook her head. “I don’t really talk about it, but I struggled with mental health issues a lot growing up.”
“What exactly does that mean?” Loki pressed. Claire sighed, reluctant to discuss it but equally surprised Loki cared enough to ask.
“Most often I had horrible headaches, night terrors, long periods of disassociation. Sometimes I wouldn’t recognize places or people, or I'd slip into languages I didn’t speak.”
“Do you still struggle with these things?”
“Yes, but I've gotten better at dealing with it as I've gotten older. I was institutionalized a couple times and learned a lot.”
“Institutionalized? Is this another word for being incarcerated?”
“It's kinda like prison, but for people with mental health issues,” Claire explained. “Ordinarily someone with my background wouldn’t have been accepted into S.H.I.E.L.D., but Phil was able to bury my records.”
“They locked you up for something beyond your control?” Loki looked taken aback.
“I mean I did break a kids arm.” Claire shrugged.
“For no reason?” Loki balked. “That doesn't seem like you.”
“Oh no, the kid was picking on another kid and I stepped in. But I don't even remember breaking his arm- he hit me and knocked something loose up here-” Claire knocked on her skull. “Next thing I knew I was at the psych ward.”
“You must have been terrified.”
“I was,” Claire nodded. “That's why I'm so good at hiding it. The ward was a shitty place and I never want to go back.”
“You won't,” Loki vowed, covering her hand with his and interlocking their fingers. “We have no such places here. I will help you as much as I can.” The affection felt strange after so many weeks at odds, but Claire accepted it anyway.
“Thank you.”
“Of course, “Loki said softly, nerves making it difficult to swallow. “Claire, I owe you an apology.” He could see the shift in her mood, feel the tension in her body as she pulled away.
“For what?” she asked, wariness and challenge woven together as she met his gaze.
“So many things,” Loki looked away in shame. “You were right, when you said things changed upon our return to the city. I owe you an explanation, and-” he paused as more people joined them in the great hall, a sigh escaping him as they chose the table nearest theirs. “Perhaps this is a conversation best held in private?”
“Why, so we can hit each other some more?” Claire balked.
“I am beyond tired of treating you as an enemy. Are you not also tired of the way things are?”
“Of course I am,” Loki mourned the loss of her hand in his as Claire crossed her arms and settled back into her seat. “You think I wanted things to be like this? I miss you, I miss us. Things would be so much easier if-”
“If I wasn’t an asshole of epic proportions, yes I know.” Loki sighed.
“As long as you know,” Claire replied before shotgunning the last of her wine. “See you at therapy.”
~~~~
“Something’s different,” Sam remarked as the trio settled into their seats. He gestured between Claire and Loki. “You talk things out?”
“I suppose-”
“No,” Claire shook her head. “We tiptoed around the issue, as fucking usual.”
“It is difficult to have private conversations when we are never alone-”
“The last time we were alone we tried to kill each other so excuse me if I’m a little hesitant-”
“Guys, chill. We’ve got the room for the rest of the day,” Sam stopped the pair before they could gain too much steam. “I got a basic rundown of what happened before I got here, but I’d like to hear it from your perspectives.”
“Why?”
“Well you were the only two in the room, and only you two really know what happened. Was that the first time you hit each other?”
“In anger, yes,” Claire replied. “We’ve fought on the training field but we weren’t trying to hurt each other, we were-.”
“Flirting?” Sam guessed.
“If you must know, yes,” Loki huffed. “It was before we married. Claire managed to knock me off my feet.” a small smile played at the corners of his mouth as he recalled their bout. Sam glanced between the couple and noticed two things-
Claire looked pleased with herself, a satisfied grin betraying her amusement. Loki looked an entirely different kind of pleased.
An idea took root in Sam’s brain.
It would probably get him fired, but he had been told failure wasn’t an option… Sam made a note to himself on his paper before digging into his bag for his first activity.
“Alright, we’re gonna try a little positive reinforcement. You both seem to think being vulnerable will put you in the hospital, so you’re gonna get rewarded for being- what, Loki?”
“This is childish and I do not wish to participate.”
“Tough titties. Thanks for volunteering to go first,” Sam replied. “For a Scooby snack, tell me one thing you like about Claire.”
“What in Bor’s name is a Scooby snack? Whatever it is, I do not want it,” Loki shuddered. “This is asinine.”
“Just answer the question, man.”
“She is...well read.”
“Okay, good start,” Sam tossed Loki a piece of candy. Loki caught the projectile easily, turning it over in his hand to inspect it. “Claire, same question.”
“Loki is very smart.” Claire eagerly snatched her treat when Sam tossed it.
“Great job,” Sam praised. “Notice how the room is not on fire? Nobody sprouted a second head?”
“Is there a point?” Loki asked, watching Claire as she unwrapped her treat.
“The point is you both said something positive about the other and nothing bad happened. Keep that in mind, because we’re gonna try something new today. You two-” Sam pointed between them. “Are gonna have an argument.”
“I thought you were here because of our arguing.”
“Today you’re going to work on some new skills. Arguments are a normal part of any relationship, but with the right tools, they don’t have to result in blood-letting.”
“Pithy.” Loki muttered, giving the gummy treat in his hand a curious sniff.
“Believe it or not, you can work through issues with your sanity and skin intact,” Sam quipped. “But the first rule is you can’t say shit just to be mean. Make your point, but be mindful. You are a team, two halves of one whole-”
“I take issue with that idiom,” Claire interjected. “That is a juvenile way of thinking and we don’t need the other to be complete.”
“Alright fine,” Sam conceded. “But if you want to improve your relationship, you have to fight on equal ground. So starting today, we’re gonna make a list of your grievances, and I will teach you the tools to work through them. We’ll tackle the list together until you’re able to do it on your own.”
~~~~
After a week of sessions with Sam, a servant she didn’t recognize came to fetch Claire for tea with Frigga. Ragna and Kari helped her get ready in a hurry, as keeping the queen waiting was a cardinal sin.
“Good morning daughter,” Frigga greeted her warmly as Claire entered. The servant curtsied and left without a word. “Please, have a seat.”
“Thank you,” Claire picked a sunny spot on a low couch, tucking one leg beneath her as she sat. A servant set a cup of steaming tea at the table beside her and Claire offered a small smile in thanks. “It’s a little early for tea, isn’t it?” she couldn’t help but ask. Frigga laughed into her cup.
“It’s not quite as early as you think, dear. You’ve slept through breakfast.”
“Oh,” Claire let out a laugh of her own as she reached for the cup. “Oops.”
“It’s quite alright. I imagine these past few days haven’t been easy for you.”
“It’s been significantly quieter.” Claire said sullenly to her tea.
“And you are...happier with this arrangement?” Frigga asked delicately. I’m certainly richer in pillows.
“Yeah, it’s alright…no one’s tried to kill me in a while, so…” Claire picked at the seam on her jeans, wishing Frigga would stop staring at her with those voodoo eyes.
“Marriage is never easy, Claire, even when you love your partner. Loki is…troubled, at best. He’s always had a temper, and you have one as well. When aimed at each other it’s like-”
“Potassium and water?” Claire offered. At Frigga’s questioning look, she explained the violent chemical reaction between the two.
“Sorry I’m late Mother, I-ah,” Loki came to a halt in the doorway when he noticed his wife. “I didn’t realize anyone was joining us.”
“It’s no matter, Loki, take a seat. Claire was just explaining some Midgardian science to me.” Of course, the only seat left was next to Claire. Frigga noooooo-ugh you cow! Shit, I don’t mean that. I love Frigga. Just wasn’t expecting the wicked witch of the north.
“Excuse me.” Loki said brusquely, barely giving Claire a second to move her foot from his cushion. A cup of tea was instantly placed beside him, steam still rising from the hot liquid.
“Oh Loki, I’ve forgotten your book!” Frigga shook her head and got to her feet. “I’ll go fetch it.” She added innocently. Because obvious Frigga is obvious. She hadn’t been out the door for a second before Loki rounded on her.
“What in Hel’s name are you doing here?” he demanded.
“I was invited. Has anyone ever told you you suck at small talk?”
“I don’t see the value in it. What are you doing?”
“Comparing us to elements. I’m potassium, you’re water. Or maybe I’m water; I haven’t decided. But they explode when combined so-”
“Violently, I assume.”
“Naturally. Potassium sucks the fun out of everything, and Water just doesn’t appreciate it.” Claire shrugged. Loki pursed his lips in thought, stirring his tea with seidr.
“Perhaps Potassium doesn’t appreciate Water’s penchant for obscenely inappropriate clothing.”
“Well Water loves her Daisy Dukes, and Potassium needs to pull the stick out of his assium and accept it,” Loki grunted and looked away from her sharply, leaving Claire to stare down at her tea awkwardly. Never one to leave things alone, she nudged Loki gently in the side. “Did you see what I did there?”
“Yes, I understood the joke.” He replied sharply.
“And?”
“And what?”
“Oh come on, that was funny!” Claire said, frowning when Loki gave her a blank look. “Do you just not have a sense of humor?”
“I do when something is funny.”
“Screw you, I’m hilarious,” Claire rolled her eyes. “You could say I’m very…punny,” Loki gave her a dark look and Claire smiled, unable to help poking the bear next to her. “I’d tell you another chemistry joke but I know I wouldn’t get a reaction.” Loki sighed heavily, setting his cup of tea down and reclining back. “Oh, oh! I’ve got one! What element derives from a Norse god?” Claire asked excitedly.
“Oh for Odin’s sake, woman! I neither know nor care to.”
“But you didn’t even hear the punchline.”
“It’s funny?” Loki asked suspiciously after a beat.
“Oh, it’s very funny.”
“If it’s not, I’ll be shoving a stick up your assium.” He said darkly.
“Haha,” Claire laughed mockingly. “Okay, you ready?”
“I suppose.”
“THORium.” Claire waited for Loki to react, but he just sat there staring at her with a strange look on his face. “Did you get it? Thorium? No?” To her surprise, Loki burst out laughing. So hard he started coughing.
“Norns, that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!”
“But it was funny,” Claire preened, pointedly ignoring how cute Loki was being with his laughing fit. “So there.” Loki quieted, seriousness enveloping him like a shroud.
“Are you settling into your chambers well?” he asked hesitantly. He seemed genuinely curious, which confused Claire. She would have thought he’d still be celebrating having his space to himself.
“Oh um…they’re the same as before, so…yes. Well, I didn’t have Mochi before, so that’s new, but overall I’m okay.”
“It’s rather nice to be able to sleep without choking on her fur.” Loki gave a tight smile.
“She sleeps on the pillow next to mine,” Claire shared without thinking. “I think she likes having one to herself.”
“I’m glad you’re comfortable,” Loki replied, setting his tea aside. “Claire, I owe you an apology,” Claire choked on her tea, shocked by Loki’s admission. He shot her a chagrined look when she nearly dropped her cup and saucer. “I am wholly aware of what people think and say of me, and I take great delight in shirking their expectations, but it was wrong of me to strike you.”
“Because you don’t think I can take it?” Claire asked sharply.
“No,” Loki shook his head. “Clearly you can,” he added, looking at the faded bruising on her throat with regret. “Some of the things you said poked at insecurities I try to never acknowledge and I lost my temper. It’s not an excuse, but I felt you were owed an explanation for my appalling behavior.” Claire eyed him warily, scrutinizing his body language from head to toe. She didn’t know what to make of the apologetic man before her; it was highly uncharacteristic for Loki to act this way.
“Did your mom put you up to this?” she asked after a beat.
“What?” Loki looked scandalized by the suggestion. “No. I am capable of deciding when I owe someone an apology without my mother’s say-so. If it offends you so terribly, you don’t have to accept.” He got up to leave, stopping when Claire called after him.
“Don’t you wanna have tea with your mom? She’s not back yet.”
“She won’t be coming back, Claire. This was her gentle attempt at getting us to communicate, but you’re not ready so I will take my leave.” Loki gave her a sarcastic bow and breezed out, like he hadn’t just dumped all the guilt on her.
“Hey!” Claire shouted after him, setting down her tea and jetting out the door. Loki was already several feet down the hall. “Don’t you walk away from me, asshole!” Claire saw the rigid set to Loki’s shoulders, but marched after him anyway. She heard Loki sigh before he turned to face her.
“You clearly aren’t interested in what I have to say-”
“That right there is the problem,” Claire snapped. “You’re not taking any real responsibility for what happened; you’re just dumping it on me. ‘Oh poor me, I lost my temper, my wife won’t listen to my apology’; grow up. You might have been able to get away with your shitty weaponized incompetence until now but I will not stand for it. You don’t get to fucking abandon me and walk away Scott free.”
“And just what can I do to appease you? Hmm? Would you like to move into my chambers?”
“No, I will not just move into your chambers,” Claire scoffed. “If you want me back, prove it. But I will not make it easy for you. I am pissed, do you hear me? Pissed. And where I come from, women are not wilting flowers who swoon at the slightest hint of repentance. I hold grudges. I will find your greatest weakness and I will fuck you up.” At last, a confession.
“Anything else I should know?”
“Yeah,” Claire nodded. “Get your little bitch in line before she loses a body part.”
“Excuse me?” Loki scoffed. “Who?!”
“Yrsa, dumbass. I’m not gonna put up with her talking shit anymore. If she wants to play little school girl games, that’s fine. I’ll shove rocks in her mouth and make her chew.”
“Claire-”
“What?! You think I give a shit about her? It makes no difference to me if the bitch has teeth. Hell, I’m doing you a favor, since she wants to suck your dick so bad.”
“That is irrelevant-”
“She left a bridle at my door, Loki! You’re supposed to be in my corner! Just a few weeks ago you all but offered to dump a corpse on my doorstep,” Claire stepped back. “For all the work we’ve been doing, I haven’t seen that Loki in a long time. You should think about that.” she turned on her heel and left him gawking after her.
~~~~
Later that night, Loki paced the length of his chambers.
In the hours since he and Claire had parted ways, he’d done little else. His supper had gone cold on his table, untouched. His lip smarted from where he’d drawn blood, worrying it as he had.
A sharp turn on his heel upset the side table next to the lounge, scattering his ink, quill, and parchment to the floor. Astrid leapt from her place to clean the mess, but Loki stopped her with a gesture, eyes rapt upon the dancing of the flames falling on the scene.
Write to her. She will listen.
Loki was not one to give in to his impulses. He enjoyed his revels, but calculated revels were they. But today, he gave in. He knelt on the floor and scribbled a plea to Claire by the light of the fire. He rolled up the scrap of paper and handed it to Astrid.
“Do not let her feed this to the fire, Astrid. This is vital.”
“Of course, my prince.” Astrid curtsied and left quickly. Heart in his throat, Loki watched her leave. This was his last chance. He could feel it in his bones. By the end of the night, he would know what kind of marriage he and Claire would have. Either they would rekindle their once scorching passion, or they would continue on in the same misery that had filled the past several months.
Unless she publicly divorces you.
Gods, please no.
A life without Claire was unconscionable. He would make this right. He had to. His thoughts drifted to Claire as he left his chambers, making his way to the garden. He could not continue as they were. He would fight for her, until his very last if he must.
He waited, heart in his throat, under the willow tree where they'd shared their first kiss. The seasons had changed with their relationship, the air now sticky and thick with moisture. He heard footsteps and jumped to attention. Was it Claire, or Astrid coming to tell him he was too late? The long branches parted, and Loki could have dropped to his knees in relief.
Claire was a vision as always, even in her simple black shorts and faded S.H.I.E.L.D U shirt.
“Is this where you kill me?” She asked. Loki scoffed, how could she think so little of him? He'd hardly treated her civilly, he thought mournfully. He deserved her mistrust. He would do everything in his power to gain it back.
“Of course not.” He said softly.
“I wouldn't mind,” she replied. “I mean, I would, but you know what they say about mercy killings. At least I'd be dying somewhere I was happy once.”
“Claire...”
“Anyway,” Claire cleared her throat, and Loki spied the tears that threatened at the corners of her eyes. “How are things?”
“Horrid.”
“You too, huh?” Claire joked. “Today was a lot.”
“It was.”
“Why am I here, Loki?” A pang thrummed Loki's core at the lack of familiarity. He hadn't thought it possible, but he missed her ridiculous nicknames for him. This was his fault. He'd driven her to this point, created such a chasm they might never cross it. But he had to try. He had to be vulnerable. Throat tight, Loki finally said what was on his mind.
“You asked him for help,” he said mournfully. They both knew who 'him' was. His name had not appeared on either of their lists, yet Thor lay deep in the painful battlefield of their discord. “You asked him, instead of me.”
“The last time I asked you for help, you ignored me. Why would I keep asking for help that doesn’t come?”
“I was a fool. I drove you to him and then punished you for it.”
“This is really nice, but I want to make it absolutely clear there was nothing inappropriate happening.”
“Yes, you have made that clear-”
“I'm just reiterating because you keep circling back-”
“Norns, woman, will you let me apologize!?” Loki roared. “I am trying to fix the damage I have caused. Will you please listen for once?”
“Why should I?”
“I do not want our marriage to be this way-”
“You're the reason we're even in this situation- because you're so adamant about hating Thor when he just wants to be your brother!”
“I KNOW!” Loki roared. “I understand now that the imbalance between us has been my perception and mine alone. Thor has never sought to do me harm and has only ever wanted to be-“ Loki's voice failed him as tears boiled over. He wiped them away angrily, wanting to focus on the issue at hand. “Do you not want to fix things? Is this not intolerable to you?”
“Of course it is,” Claire said gently as she wrapped her arms around his trembling shoulders. “But I don't know if I can trust the things you say anymore.”
“Give me a day,” Loki pleaded. “I will prove my worth-”
“It's not about worth, Loki. You have worth with or without me.”
“What then?”
“I need to know that you won't pull the rug out from under me again. Until you earn that trust back, this won't work. You'll need more than a day, mischief.” Loki grabbed her hand and brought it to his lips, then let it rest over his heart.
“I swear to you, I will earn your trust again. For as long as my heart beats, it shall beat for you.”
This motherfucker. Tears pricked at Claire's eyes once more as Loki's earnest gaze made her heart swell.
“You stop that,” she chided tearfully. “Making me feel feelings.”
“I shan't apologize,” Loki grinned. “Will you stay with me?”
“Here?”
“Why not?” Loki asked. “The moon is full, and you are beautiful.” He dipped his head to kiss her, and Hecate help her, Claire almost gave in.
“You're pushing it.” She said softly, pulling back even though her lips tingled with anticipation. Loki chuckled, manifesting a blanket and spreading it at the base of the tree. He left his boots at the edge of the blanket, a pillow appearing under his head as he laid down.
“Lay down with me, little wife.” Claire hesitated for a moment, and Loki's heart thumped anxiously as he watched her debate. Then Claire left her shoes beside his and curled into his side as if she'd never left. Loki's heart warmed as she made herself comfortable, head resting on his shoulder as her leg curled around his.
@meowmeow-motherfucker 💛💚🖤💛💚🖤💛💚🖤 (shouting to the rooftops!!) We got a Covenant chapter!!!💛💚🖤💛💚🖤 We got a Covenant chapter!!! 💛💚🖤💛💚🖤 And my two favorite knuckleheads made me tear up🥹🥰🥹🥰 Sam was a great choice to help the start to see things differently. This made my night!!!
