Jamphibian

They/Them | 21 | Stupid

[dildo--boy]

i love you pumpkins i love you bats i love you monsters i love you horror i love you spirit i love you candy i love you autumn i love you costumes i love you decorations i love you orange i love you haunted houses i love you hoodie weather i love you candy corn i love you cobwebs i love you halloween!!

[homunculus-argument]

God will see you at the lowest point of your life, and say "what the fuck I thought I killed that thing." But you skitter too fast and you are too creepy.

[fluffysheeple]

christian bad driver: my guardian angel watches over me, I don't need to look before I merge

atheist bad driver: I will rely on my own skill to see myself safely home after a mere 8 drinks

agnostic bad driver: no one knows where all these dents and scratches came from

[fettuccini-western]

in honor of leviticus being out on digital here's my tribute to ryanaim <333

[connorsnothereeither]

While I’m on the Under the Heavy Blanket of Twilight train-

A massive shout out to @djicing for the incredible canon art of Tzofeh’el/Sophie for the specials, everyone should follow DJ they’re so cool :))

[lotus--pond]

headcanon that as Neph is now free to start telling the party more about like his childhood and what it was like for him growing up, once Kieran catches onto the fact that Neph hasn't really been able to try very many different foods (aka the palace picked the meals for servants) and has only started trying new foods after running away, everytime they pass like a food stand while they're traveling he's just like. hey does that look good? and if the answer is yes he's already over there buying some for at least Neph, and probably the rest of the party if they asked.

like yeah Neph has technically had the time to try different foods, however he has not always had the money to do so. Kieran however, has very deep pockets. pockets so deep in fact that his entire cloak is just one big pocket. I think Kieran keeps a mental note of what Neph seems to like and not like when they try stuff, so he can point out things he thinks Neph would enjoy.

At some point Neph might try to be like, "oh no you really don't have to! its fine, its really not that big of a d-" and Kieran is just like "girl, shut up and take the damn croffle"

[fairycosmos]

my dead wife. the ad free internet

[pansyfemme]

cd has a hole. record has a hole. casette has 2 holes. streaming? zero holes. i think i’ve made my point

[stillfuckingtired]

Brain fog is not an adequate descriptor, actually. Fog can be kinda nice and beautiful and ethereal and refreshing. The thing we’re describing is more like a brain BOG; everything moves slow like you’re wading through water, it’s clunky and heavy and you keep getting stuck in the mud. It’s uncomfortable and inconvenient and everything takes so much effort. You lost a shoe, probably.

[piranesies]

they should invent putting on sunscreen that doesn't feel like putting on sunscreen

[gingik]

[i-fuck-audis]

MY FUCKING CAR

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

nip over to troy, bit of rough and tumble, big horse, bish bash bosh, back home to ithaca. simple as

[imposterogers]

if I was matt murdock and I found out the same chemical spill that blinded me and lit the world on “fire” turned a bunch of turtles into pizza loving ninjas I would lose it actually

[imposterogers]

I’m not going lie the thought of matt finding out he’s radioactive ooze brothers with this particular version of the tmnt has me in tears

[imposterogers]

matt, trying to recount his childhood and ignore the smell of turtle, three day old pizza, and sewer: …..so yah, after my dad died I was basically on my own.

the turtles, already planning on buying their radioactive waste brother a shirt that says “I fell in radioactive waste and all I got was these glasses”: cowabummer dude. our dad’s a rat

[anachronistique]

idk he looks like he's come to terms with it

[holly-hill]

[clowngirrl]

[friendlyfatigue]

remember when linguini brought a rat he found back to his apartment and got all embarrassed and was like it’s not much. to the rat