Wesker

[jessicawesker83]

despite their fighting, I can definitely see these two getting along.

[jessicawesker83]

imagine if these two met. I can definitely see them battling each other.

[ladyanaconda]

Negotiation (Olga Edition)

When Olga started regained consciousness, her head still throbbing from the near-suffocation of being in space without proper gear, she realized she was not in the Communiverse anymore. As her vision cleared, she noticed the atmosphere was much darker and hotter. She was on a sort of… observation deck, with high ceilings and towering windows looking out at the vast space beyond.

The panic set in as memories of what had happened flooded back into her mind: Grigon’s threat to the Communiverse, his grappling hook seizing her, dragging her out into space.

Elio! He was still in the Communiverse! She had to get him out of there before–!

Something suddenly rose from the floor, making Olga crawl back in fright as horns blared a dark tune, accompanied by flames shooting out at the sides of the large pedestal. Once it had completely risen, the pedestal opened dramatically, revealing a towering, four-legged shape, the same Olga had seen in the council chambers: Lord Grigon.

“You’re finally awake.” Said Grigon, stepping out of the pedestal, his four angry-looking eyes looking at the Uh-Earthling up and down. “How pathetic.” 

Olga would have liked to point out that, unlike him, she couldn’t breathe in space, but from what she’d seen back in the auditorium, this guy had a very short fuse, and saying anything he could deem as talking back might anger him, so she held that comment back.

“S-Sir–Your Lordship,” Olga stuttered, scrambling back to her feet, her brain still processing the fact that she’d been abducted twice, and this time, the alien in question looked anything but friendly. “I-I don’t know what I did to you, or what you think I did to you, but–”

Grigon’s arm transformed into a sort of pistol. “Hylurgians prefer to negotiate with screams in the air,” he growled, turning to a large balcony connected to his parlor. “PULL!

Someone tossed a colorful little bird-like alien into the air. Olga paled as Lord Grigon took aim and fired a big blast from his weapon at it, and the little creature exploded in a puff of feathers. 

That might as well be her if she didn’t tread carefully.

Grigon, unfazed, calmly removed his laser arm and handed it to a soldier. “Recoil’s a little heavy,” he said, then turned to his ‘guest.’ “Your turn.” 

Just as Grigon began to sit, several soldiers hurried over and arranged themselves into the shape of this throne, just in time to catch him as he sat—Olga briefly wondered what would happen to them if they’d arranged a little too late—while a few other soldiers crouched beside him, creating a small table and an ottoman of sorts. 

Realizing what he wanted of her, Olga cleared her throat. “I’m afraid I don’t have a weapon like yours, sir.” She said, hoping that would be enough to get out of shooting alien critters. 

Something mechanical rose from the floor: a table of weapons.

“Use one of mine,” offered Grigon with a sneer. 

Damn. 

“T-Thank you.” 

With no other choice, Olga examined the weapons laid out, and opted to pick the smallest one. It seemed simple enough, with a trigger and handle, much like a pistol, but bigger and with glowing red patterns. As she lifted it, she found it to be much heavier too, almost as the backpacks she had to carry during her early days of military training, but thankfully she managed to lift it up.

Grigon watched his ‘rival’, if she could be called that, as she examined his stash of weapons and, surprisingly, picked up the small blaster, against all expectations. It seemed to be heavier than she was used to, but her body language showed she was familiar with weapons. This is going to be… entertaining.

“PULL!” shouted Grigon. 

The soldier on the other side of the balcony tossed another bird-like creature into the air. Grigon looked down at Olga expectantly.

For once, Olga was grateful for the hunting trips her uncle Mateo would take her and Joaquín during their summer breaks. Taking a deep breath, she raised the pistol, aimed it at the bird, and fired. A small missile flew from her weapon and hit the target. Briefly, Olga felt bad for the little bird as it tried to float away, but if she had to choose between it and her own life, she’d choose the latter.

“Not bad for a puny creature,” Lord Grigon chuckled approvingly. “Perhaps we can communicate.” He held up his cannon and shouted, “PULL.” A group of bird aliens was thrown into the air. “But those Communiverse weaklings look at me like I’m some kind of monster. How dare they reject me?!”

I wonder why, Olga thought as Grigon angrily blasted the birds. 

“What does that have to do with me?” she asked warily. “I mean, I’m not even one of them.”

“Perhaps, but as the other candidate, that makes you my rival. Why would they even pick you over me, anyway?!” 

“Well, for starters, I didn’t blow up their ceiling.” Said Olga, frowning a bit. “Why are you so obsessed with getting into the Communiverse, anyway?”

“Why, you ask?” asked Grigon bitterly. “The Communiverse is where the greatest leaders gather! Am I not great?”

Olga thought carefully about what to say next. One wrong word, and any chances of saving Elio—and his new alien ‘friends’—would go right out the window. 

“I’m sure you are, sir. More of a reason not to waste your time with them.” She said, using the gentle but firm tone she’d often use with her nephew. “The ‘weaklings’ don’t want you? Just… get over it and try with someone at your level.”

As Grigon pondered her words, he glimpsed a soldier hovering meekly in the doorway. The warlord sighed with irritation. “What, Worco? What is it?”

Worco nervously stammered. “Your Wrath, the princeling wants to see you.”

 “Oh, for the hate of–! Tell him I’m busy!” snapped Grigon. He sighed, exasperated, as Worco scurried away. “You are a parent, right? I saw your kid back at the Communiverse.”

Olga’s heart skipped a beat at the mention of Elio. “You could say so, sir–Your Wrath. He’s actually my nephew, but I’ve been raising him since–”

“Then you know what I’m talking about. It is so difficult!” interrupted Grigon with a sigh. “He has no concept of the importance of my work.”

To Olga’s surprise, Grigon’s four eyes reflected not anger, but… frustration, a sentiment she was very familiar with.

“… I know the feeling.” She admitted, crossing her arms. “My nephew is a good kid, but it’s so… difficult talking to him sometimes.”

“Has he caused problems that nearly resulted in an intergalactic war with your closest allies?”

Cielo santo. “Almost. He caused a blackout that nearly cost me my job.”

She jumped, startled, as Grigon bellowed. “Finally, someone gets it!” he said, his tone shifting and his body language becoming more relaxed. “Sounds like he needs an exemplary punishment.” 

“I know what he did what’s wrong, but… I don’t think an ‘exemplary punishment’ will help at this point.” 

Grigon raised an invisible eyebrow. He made a gesture, and one soldier stretched out a leg to act as a small ‘seat’ for his rival. 

Olga had to admit it was… nice of him. She climbed onto the soldier’s leg to sit on it.

“Come again?” asked Grigon curiously.

“He’s having… We are having a hard time. His parents… My brother… they died in an accident a few years ago, and it’s been the two of us ever since. But Elio is a… particular child. He has no friends, he’s got this obsession with aliens, and when I try to get him to open up to people, to me, he just… he shuts me out.” Olga wiped her eyes with her forearm. “I just… I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel so… alone.” 

The alien warlord’s expression shifted completely. Olga couldn’t put a finger on it, but it looked like… sympathy? Sadness? Either looked so… out of place in the hulking, war-mongering alien who’d just fired missiles at innocent bird aliens. 

Noticing the unshed tears and deep sorrow in his supposed rival’s eyes, Grigon felt a… tugging in his chest at the Uh-Earthling’s troubles… Troubles he was too familiar with.

“… I’m… I’m sorry about your… loss.” Said Grigon, his voice gentle but somewhat awkward. Then he cleared his throat and regained his composure. “If you tell anyone about this, I’ll use you as target practice.”

Somehow, Olga had the feeling it was a joke, but she still stifled back a laugh, just in case. But he seemed to be more… casual now. Perhaps now would be a good time to make her petition.

Olga got off her ’seat’, stood in front of the warlord, and bowed. “Your Wrath, please… My nephew is in the Communiverse. I beg you, don’t destroy it.” 

Grigon’s digital eyes softened again as the sensation in his chest intensified. He… He hasn’t felt something like this in a long time, not since…The Blood Emperor shook his head, pushing the memories out of his mind, his expression hardening. It’s all in the past.

“What is your name, Uh-Earthian?” asked Grigon, catching Olga—and his soldiers—by surprise. He never asked his captives for their names.

“Olga Solís.” Olga replied quickly. “Does that mean you’re sparing the Communiverse?”

“Oh, no, I’m still blowing them up.” He clarified. Grigon reached out a claw to lift her chin with a finger to look into her eyes, grinning. “But fear not, Olga Solís. I’ll make sure your nephew is not on it when I blow them into a thousand smithereens!” He looked at one of his soldiers who was still on his feet. “Grok, take my guest to her chambers.” 

The hulking soldier grabbed Olga’s arm, and as he dragged her out of the observation deck, she glanced back at Grigon one last time as he turned toward the stars out the window, hands behind his back, before the doors slammed shut.

[pianokantzart]

Do you think if Bowser Jr ever found out about how his dad tried to marry Peach back in the first movie, do you think Junior would be enraged that his own dad didn’t ever bother inviting him to the wedding? I think he’d definitely be ticked off at his Dad for wasting his time obsessing over Peach and neglecting him. He’d be so angry that Bowser would focus more about some princess than caring about him to the point Junior would start beating up Bowser. I can imagine back in boarding school for him that Junior basically had to raise himself and attend his own parent-teacher conferences since no one bothered to help him.

I think you underestimate just how good the kid is at deluding himself.

Junior’s already romanticized the neglect by aggrandizing how hard Bowser was working to take over the world, and I have no doubt that Junior’s already come to the conclusion that he was pseudo-abandoned for his own good (which, in defense of that notion, Junior has achieved crazy levels of success on his own.)

I think if he found out about the wedding he would feel a little hurt, but find a way to rationalize it in his head.

Probably tell himself either…

A. Bowser wanted to make the new addition to the family a pleasant surprise for when Junior got back from boarding school

B. The wedding precedings happened too quickly for Junior to arrive on time, even if he had been invited

C. Bowser didn’t know yet that Junior was mature enough to attend without jeopardizing the admittedly-shaky blackmail situation

This outlook might change as Junior gets older if he can get over his commitment bias, but I don’t see him turning on his Dad so easily after putting him on a pedestal for so long and revolving his entire life around making his father proud.

[jessicawesker83]

Imagine if Carnage was in No Way Home. Would’ve been one helluva battle.

[jessicawesker83]

I noticed when rewatching the Super Mario Galaxy movie, the choppers cop code is literally 1981, referencing the year when the Donkey Kong arcade game released.

Also is nobody gonna talk about how this the first time we see Kamek without his glasses?

[jessicawesker83]

If Huntrix were mermaids, I guess the Saja Boys would be pirates.

Original artist: https://www.instagram.com/p/DYCjuZVEYl_/

[jessicawesker83]

Most hated character in Ready or Not 2?

Bill Wilkinson

Francesca El Caido

Titus Danforth

Pernila

Madhu Rajan

Voting ended onMay 18

[darkwingsnark]

‘If I bite you, I make you mine.’

Over on the Temple of Bowuigi discord we are currently hosting an event called ‘Art For Authors’. It’s where we show love for fanfics and their creators.

This time I wanted to highlight @justashyfly’s fic: ‘MARKED’

Pursuing Peaches when she's only interested in Mario has repeatedly gotten him nowhere. It's long past time he should've been considering other options. Bowser's known that for a while now. And by some luck of the stars, Luigi ends up in his clutches. A relationship with Greenie will get him the pretty much the same thing he'd sought most from Peaches all along: new trading partners, and a bridge to peace with the other kingdoms. Bowser knows an opportunity when he sees one...and he sinks in his teeth.

[imnotreallyherejustlurking]

i'm actually kind of annoyed that they will kill you was overshadowed by ready or not 2 because while i don't think the premise itself was anything original, it was still really fun, well made (the set design was GORGEOUS), and beautifully choregraphed. zazie beetz brought a lot of intensity to the role that had you hooked from the beginning. meanwhile i don't think ready or not ever needed a sequel, and the film itself seemed to be made just as an excuse to have the three popular blonde scream queens in it, rather than because it had anything more to say.

also, it doesn't escape my notice what demographic movie marketing always decides to cater to...

anyway, just look at this bedroom set:

[jessicawesker83]

Ready or Not: They Will Kill You! (Ready or not 2 x They Will Kill You crossover AU)

This AU starts off with Grace and Faith undergoing new identities in New York after everything that happened at the Danforth estate. They needed a place to stay for awhile until they could get back on their feet again, so one rainy day they come across the Virgil hotel and are greeting by Lilith Woodhouse and given a hotel room on the third floor. At first it feels like Grace and Faith are finally getting some normalcy back in their lives, that is until at night, Grace wakes up in the middle of the night to find her sister gone. She exits her hotel room to see two black robed men in pig masks taking an unconscious Faith upstairs. Not taking any chances, Grace arms herself with a fork from her hotel room and follows the robed men upstairs through the dumbwaiter. She thinks that she's in Mr. Le Bails game again for a third round, but she is unprepared for what she'll find upstairs at the top of the Virgil.

When Grace gets to the top floor, she stabs a cultist with the fork and then grabs Faith who just regained consciousness. Faith is confused as to what's going on as Grace claims she's just as lost as Faith is. There were too many cultists and Grace assumes that Le Bail is back to make her go through another round of the hide and seek hunt. Before Grace could fight back, two more cultists restrained her and Faith as Lily Woodhouse claims that Grace's ambush was unexpected and Grace claims that she and Faith are leaving. Suddenly an inhuman roar is heard from the other side of the door and Lily goes to check. Upon returning, Lily says "Our Lord wishes to talk to you, Ms. MacCaulley.". Confused, Grace is forced into the room by the cultists and they take her to the center of the room. Faith is still restrained by the cultists while Grace screams in terror at the fact that she is face to face with the living Pig Head. One of its tendrils lifts her chin, saying "The unwilling sacrifice who took down my brother's organization."

Grace is confused as to what the Pig Head means. It explains that Le Bail is his little brother and that Le Bail's organization wasn't the only one. The Pig Head explains that while Le Bail gives curses, he gives gifts. "One death, for one life." When Grace asks what he meant by that, he tells her that he gives his members immortality. This causes Grace to realize that she is in deep s*** with a Satanic Immortality Cult. The tendril starts to choke her out for destroying everything his little brother built, saying "I will devour your soul. Then swallow your sister's heart next." Grace then bites down on the tendril, causing the pig head to let her go. She tells it to leave Faith out of this. But the pigs head makes an offer for Grace. The Pig Head then claims that normally his followers would've slit Faith's throat in honor of him, but he says that a maid was caught vandalizing.

Grace thinks that the Pig Head (Satan) is offering Faith to be a maid instead of a sacrifice but Grace makes an offer of her own: if she were to stay at The Virgil and be his toy, he'd leave Faith alone. The Pig Head agrees with the condition that shed visit the top floor every night to satisfy him. Stifling her tears, Grace agrees, sealing the deal, but refusing to write her name on its skin to be immortal. In a twisted turn of events, The Pig's Head brought the Six High Council Families back to life (including the Le Domases), forcing the high council families to do his bidding and sign their names to be immortal as punishment for their failures and breaking Le Bail's rules, under the condition that none of the council families hurt Grace or Faith. If they do hurt Grace or Faith, they would be punished gruesomely. Not by spontaneous combustion but by slowly and painfully melting into a puddle of blood.

Grace and Faith are now trapped in the Virgil under the eye of Lily and Ray Woodhouse. Ray however feels sorry for the sisters. But Grace's life gets turned upside down when a new maid named "Isabelle" (Asia Reaves) arrives.

[jessicawesker83]

I just noticed something in this Mario Galaxy Movie scene. When the painting dragon is defeated, some of the paint lands IN YOSHI’S MOUTH. Poor guy had must’ve had to wash his mouth out after that. 😬

[jessicawesker83]

So who would want to see a Ready or Not 2 x They Will Kill You crossover AU?

Sure!

meh

Voting ended onApr 25

Link to the crossover AU: https://www.tumblr.com/jessicawesker83/815149462606561280/ready-or-not-they-will-kill-you-ready-or-not-2?source=share

[jessicawesker83]

I’m sorry, I just had to turn this scene into a GIF, it was just too funny 😂

(SPOILERS AHEAD!!!)

[moviekitty]

You and Me... Always Forever (Yandere! Jerry? × GN! Reader)

Summary: You've been in a long distance relationship with the mayor of Beaverton himself. You've decided to visit him after his rally but he seems to be acting unusual...

Note: This is a yandere fic so expect some dark stuff... I think we all know where this is going. Also expect some Black Mirror stuff to happen.

If you told anyone that you were dating the mayor of Beaverton himself, they'd think you're lying... but it's true. You couldn't blame them, it was a long distance relationship. But it was there. All the video calls and texting, it was there. It's been a while since you've seen him so you decided to take a flight and a little road trip to Beaverton.

You did try to get in touch with him during the rally but he didn't seem to respond back. You shrugged it off, maybe he was focused on the rally and election. You kept driving and finally arrived into the city of Beaverton.

"Weird." you thought, "Was it always this empty?"

You kept on driving anyways. There were still some people so it wasn't THAT empty.

You finally arrived at Jerry's home. You parked your car near the sidewalk before exiting and walking up to his porch. You took a deep breath before knocking on the door. You could hear footsteps coming from the door before it opened, revealing Jerry.

"Oh, sweetie!" Jerry greeted you, his smile wide.

You couldn't help but noticed a few things about him. First off, his shirt was unbuttoned enough to show his chest hair. Secondly, his voice sounded a bit higher than usual, especially for his age. Was that a tiny crown on his head too?

"Hi babe..." you greeted back, "You're acting... different."

"Oh..." he trailed off, "Well I guess the rally has unlocked some confidence in me." "You were always confident though. And I love you for it." His face softened at that before inviting you inside. You looked around, expecting his mom to be around. She always enjoyed having you around whenever you visit.

"Where's your mom?" you asked.

Jerry immediately froze before looking back at you.

"She's out of town. She won't be back after a while."

"Ok..."

You knew that Jerry's mom wasn't the type to usually travel, especially without her son to take care of her. This day was getting weirder and weirder.

After unpacking, you and Jerry did some catching up. During your catching up, you asked him about the rally and the apparent ghost town that this city became. He told you that the rally went great and that the people probably just in their homes, having a day off from the rally. You just smile and nod but you couldn't help but think how weird it was for this place to be a ghost town, save for a few people.

Evening soon rolls around and you decided to go out and get some food. Jerry seemed to be more than happy for this which was weird since he loved to cook for you or his mom. When you got into town, all of the restaurants seemed to be empty or closed. You asked some people in town if they knew if any spots were open but they were all tourists who were just confused as you are. Luckily, one suggested a place not too far out of town.

You finally got to that place before ordering something to go. However, the cashier asked you something.

"Are you from Beaverton?"

You blinked, "Yeah but I'm visiting. Why?"

"It's just that some of the people here thought they heard something from Beaverton. Like a loud noise."

"Huh... do you know where?"

They paused for a moment before responding, "I think it was around that glade, y'know where mayor is building the beltway?"

You froze, lost in thought. Wasn't that where the rally was? Jerry mentioned nothing of a loud noise. Then again, Jerry was a bit over the top with his campaigns, his rallies were no different, maybe some music was blasting and the town nearby heard. You paid for your food and drove back. You arrived back to Jerry's home but he was nowhere to be seen.

"Babe!" you called out, "I'm back!"

Jerry entered the living room to see you and immediately hugged you.

"There you are! I missed you so much!" "I was only gone for half an hour." you told him as you hugged him with your free arm.

Dinner went smoothly though you noticed that Jerry was trying (and failing) to stomach the food. It didn't taste THAT bad to you.

Later that night, as Jerry spooned you, you couldn't help but feel like something very bad is going to happen to you...

Suddenly, in the middle of the night, you woke up. You heard nothing nor see nothing out of the ordinary. It was more like a gut feeling. You noticed that Jerry was gone but then you heard a THUD coming from a room. You instantly went to investigate. You followed the noise down to the basement, where you could hear Jerry muttering. After slowly opening the basement door, you peeked from behind and saw something disturbing.

You saw Jerry... Or more specifically, Jerry's dead body. He was seen, completely stiff and pale. He was in his tank top, blue boxers and knee high black socks. There were obvious signs of decomposition as maggots made their home inside his body and the stench was outright horrible. But then, who was the man you were talking to?

You got that answer as the imposter had his back turned on you. You could see that it was emptying the food from earlier.

"The things I do for them..." he muttered.

You couldn't help but silently gagged at the sight before sneaking away back to the bedroom. You immediately grabbed all your stuff, packed it into your suitcase and snuck out of the house, not caring if you were in your pajamas. This was a horror movie that your ass wasn't going to be apart of.

As you drive back to the airport, you came across the glade and noticed something horrifying. Tons of dead bodies were piled up and the stage for the rally was still up. You were so confused and scared that you almost hit something. You managed to swerve out of the way and in the rearview mirror, it was just some bird crossing. But then suddenly, you started to see thousands of butterflies coming after your car. That couldn't be right, it was something out of a natural horror film.

They started to swarm your car, covering up all the windows. It was only a matter of time before-

CRASH!

The airbag went off as the car crashed into a road railing and into the Beaverton forest. You somehow managed to get out of the car wreck before heard a familiar voice.

"You tried to leave me?"

You looked up to see Jerry, no, the fake Jerry in front of you, surrounded by butterflies like he was a king.

"You stay away!" you yelled at him, trying to back away.

"I don't get it, what did I do wrong?" he asked with faux innocence.

"You have my real boyfriend's body rotting in the basement!"

As Jerry tried to step forward, you didn't hesitate to punch him. He threw his head back from the punch before a branch snagged onto his head and ripped his face off, revealing a robotic exoskeleton underneath. As you screamed in horror, he kept looking at you, somehow with love sickness still in those eyes.

"He was never right for you! He didn't care about those animals like you do..."

You paused. You never told Jerry about your love of animals, especially this version.

"How did you-"

Before you could react, all kinds of animals swarmed at you and then everything went black.

When you finally woke up, you noticed that you were in Jerry's basement. But everything seemed so large now. After looking around, you realized you were in some sort of small exhibit.

"What's going on??" you thought as you looked around.

Your eyes immediately landed on something terrifying. Nearby was your body... in a chair with some sort of weird device surrounding your head. If that was your body... then what-

"You finally woke up." a familiar voice called out.

You looked over to see the fake Jerry looming over you, behind the glass. The skin mask seemed to be sewn back together but one part of his cheek was still missing the skin so the metal exoskeleton was still showing over there.

"What have you done with me?!" you yelled out.

"I made you one of us." he replied.

You looked down to see black fur and you saw your reflection in the glass. With a closer look, you gasped in horror. You were no longer human, you were now a monarch butterfly.

"What the hell?!" you shrieked, "You're a monster!"

"MAYBE I AM!" he yelled before lowering his voice, "But I am your monster."

"I might as well tell you the truth..." the fake Jerry said, "My real name is Titus. And I'm the one responsible for taking the lives of your pathetic excuse of a mate and the rest of the humans that lived here. All of those people from the rally had their brains squished from the fake trees emitting the sound! Not only was the sound very annoying, but loud enough to destroy them! And some kid and those doctors tried to stop me but it was too late."

Your eyes widened with fear, so that's why the town nearby heard the loud noise.

"Why didn't you kill me??" you asked with fear.

"Oh, after I gained possession of the human king's phone, I saw you and started to fall in love with you. Everything about you, your personality to your love for animals, it was too good to be true. The only unfortunate part was that you were human. So I made you one of us..."

"Where's my body?!" Jerry- no, Titus yelled out.

Plenty of the insects rolled over a machine to reveal another monarch butterfly surrounded by the same device that was surrounding your head.

"That's the real me..." Titus murmured out before facing you, "But don't worry, I'll take care of you, like how you took care of me when I was a caterpillar."

"What are you talking about??" you asked, now filled with rage.

"I knew you wouldn't remember but does this sound familiar?" Titus asked before continuing, "You were sitting near the lake on that glade and saw me, a caterpillar just minding my own business. You couldn't help but pet me on the head. I didn't know why I accepted your affection but that was the first time I ever felt something. I never forgot your face since then. Funny how the universe made us cross paths again."

"IT WAS NOTHING BUT A SIMPLE TOUCH!" you yelled.

"To you. But that was the first time a human was nice to me. You can be angry all you want but this is fate!" Titus replied with such lust in his voice.

As realization sank in, you sat on the ground of the tank before you let out choked cries. You couldn't really produce tears as it turns out you're inhabiting a robot just like Titus but you couldn't help to feel helpless in this situation. You felt yourself being scooped up by human hands before being taken out of the tank by Titus.

"No... Don't cry..." he cooed with genuine concern before gently kissing you, "I'll take care of you... It'll just be you and me..."

"Always and forever."

[pianokantzart]

I’m home from the Super Mario Galaxy Movie!!!

Spoiler-filled thoughts under the cut:

Pros:

Yoshi’s a wonderful addition to the cast. Every time he’s on screen he’s a total delight.

The bros, as usual, have fantastic chemistry. Love Luigi teasing the hell out of Mario over his crush, which I have a feeling is going to only grow more and more transparent with every movie (congrats Mario on your first official cheek kiss.)

When Bowser started freaking out after getting his tail caught in the door I lost my shit. I don’t think I’ve laughed that loud at a movie in a long time.

KAMEK IS DRINKING COFFEE FROM AN E. GADD MUG LUIGI’S MANSION MOVIE HERE WE COME I CAN ALMOST TASTE IT

I like that Bowser was both near-completely absent in his kid’s life, but also extremely enthusiastic and affectionate the few times they were together. It helps to make him still feel like canon Bowser while still explaining why Junior wasn’t a factor in the previous movie.

Luigi continues to be an absolutely delightful golden retriever of a human being. Can’t believe he solved an entire plot point because he felt like fucking around and doing a little improv bit on Star Fox’s radio. He won Bowser’s alliance with a weekly book club for crying out loud he is such a fruity little nerd. I want to squeeze him until he explodes.

The entire Peach vs SMB2 scene with the underground casino went hard. Goes toe-to-toe with the Mario Bros vs Junior scene for the best action sequence in the film.

I like the rugpull the writers did where it looked like Mario and Fox McCloud were going to be rivals, but instantly became besties instead. Mario and McCloud: Adrenaline junkie buddies 🤝

Fox’s 2D animated segment was rad as hell

Rosalina only being vulnerable because she puts all her energy into protecting the Lumas feels very appropriate.

DAISY IN THE POST-CREDITS SCENE AND SHE HAS A BIT OF A TAN!?!??? BE STILL MY BEATING HEART.

Cons:

I recognize that Bowser is easily swayed by whoever is giving him positive attention at that point in time, but I feel like he was on board with being besties with Mario way too quickly. When he promised to stay prisoner in the Bros’ stead on Honeyhive, I expected he’d at least play by his own rules and break out as soon as the Mario Bros had safely gotten away? SOMETHING to make him still feel a little bit Bowsery.

LUIGI SHOULD’VE BEEN THERE TO CONFRONT BOWSER ON THE BRIDGE! What do you mean we put all that focus on and energy into Luigi being the primary force that turned him to the good side, and then Lu doesn’t have to chance to so much as bring it up when Bowser backslides into being evil again?! Absolute travesty of a missed opportunity.

I’m sorry Starfox Fans but it should have been Lubba. I’m glad you got your crumbs but he felt aggressively out of place.

The baby hijinks are fun in a vacuum, but if you ask me that part should’ve been scrapped. It served almost no purpose, and I feel like the movie would’ve been better if they had yoinked the entire scene in favor of focusing on more important stuff….

…Like Rosalina. Poor, poor Rosalina. I’m okay with her and Peach being sisters, but I don’t like that the entire rest of her backstory got completely neglected as a result, and I definitely don’t like the magic hands deus ex machina they made up to solve the entire plot.

OVERALL:

If The Super Mario Bros. Movie was a 7/10, this one was more a 6/10.

I didn’t hate it, and I had a blast, but unlike the first movie where all the scenes (while rushed) felt necessary, there are so many things that I feel should’ve been cut in favor of expanding what they set up: Luigi and Bowser’s dynamic, Rosalina and Peach’s history, Yoshi and Toad’s eventual friendship… all of that felt kinda undercooked.

It’s funny, energetic, and visually spectacular, but it’s the movie equivalent of a giant pixie stick and… I don’t know… I was hoping for at least a little bit of substance this time? At least as much as we got in the first movie, which I feel isn’t much to ask.

Will I watch it again?

Yes. Absolutely.

Do I hope for better in the next movie?

Heeeeell yes

[jessicawesker83]

Imagine if these two movies had a crossover

Link to crossover AU: https://www.tumblr.com/jessicawesker83/815149462606561280/ready-or-not-they-will-kill-you-ready-or-not-2?source=share