send help.

no escape

[dailycatsblog]

[radicalgraff]

Ad blocking in Melbourne

[anarchacitizen]

For educational purposes only, obviously.

[captain-price-returns]

[sailor-arashi]

[venndaai]

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

[venndaai]

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

[fluorescentbrains]

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

[muffinlance]

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

Eye-opening research: Greenland sharks maintain vision for centuries through DNA repair mechanism

Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

[datadegroove-deactivated2026042]

My Chemical Romance is what they would call Breaking Bad if it were a yaoi manga

[tastylemonbread]

[emil]

"Peggle make phone calls" has become shorthand for "fuck it, whatever" for me but no one ever knows what im talkingabout and it's also longer (longhand?)

[emil]

peggle make phone calls

[ozempicofficial]

[golongbyjoannanewsom]

obsessed w this person in the replies

[romehbo]

[northshorewave]

Browsing old Better Call Saul post-episode threads and found this absolute pearl of a comment:

[frailgun]

more women should have the body of a snake imo

[frailgun]

more women should have 4 arms

[pineyw00dsshesquatch]

Best I can do is 6 arms and centipede

[frailgun]

"best I can do is going above and beyond the call of duty"

[captain-price-returns]

[sailermoon]

this is how new yorkers @ mamdani

[sailermoon]

[discount-supervillain]

[uncertainlys]

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

[suzirya]

I got permission from this friend to post this because holy fuck I can't stop laughing

[the-bakeneko]

American sensei: imagine a bunless burger with no patty