Maturity Is Overrated

hello I'm Mia and I'm from Canada. eh. She/They, 30. Aro-demi for the most part

[winonaparadise]

i see a curved penis and i want to fix that shit. it's not that it's gross i just bet an hour in a bench vice would make that shit shoot straight. i wanna comically spin the handle and wrench it tight with the skill of a shop teacher that's been doing this for years. safety goggles on. heavy duty gloves. op! be careful of the clenching back there. that's how Ms. Paradise lost a pinky in college.

[winonaparadise]

I suppose this exposes my ignorance and inexperience. I suggest we normalize the use of the penis vice so that we can curve and straighten cocks to our own unique tastes. They can be 3D printed with an aposable skeleton so that they can be curved. I have included a mockup down below.

[transhumanisticpanspermia]

op i regret to inform you that the curve is so inherent that it persists even when you flip it inside out, turn it into a vagina, and stick a ramrod straight dilator into it for 30 minutes 4 times per day for several months.

(they don't usually give you an MRI 4 months after bottom surgery, i just happened to need one for unrelated reasons)

[winonaparadise]

girl why is your pussy trying to take me on the road less traveled. fucking that thing i hear google maps say "exit left." trying to hit your spot but your pussy said that's not part of the guided tour. your shit is so twisted the people's joker took it to her doctor saying "like this please." I KNOW she WILL be comin around the mountain when she comes! i always wanted a girl who turned heads, but this is ridiculous!!!

[fliesinthescreen]

mom called me a fag yesterday by accident

[fliesinthescreen]

she was going to call me a bitch (playful) and i saw her gears turning like no but he's trans i need to call him the male equivalent. and then say fag and look so so surprised at the word that came out of her own mouth. it was like watching someone fail a disco elysium skill check irl

[fliesinthescreen]

AUTHORITY - One of your sons is being annoying to the other. Make it clear that you think this is unfair.

YOU - "Stop being a b--"

REACTION SPEED [Challenging: Success] - Wait a minute.

DRAMA - Sire, the word you're about to use is historically feminine! Applying it to your transgender child is tantamount to misgendering him.

1. [Suggestion - Legendary 14] Think of a masculine equivalent to "bitch."

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[hylasregilla]

Huge fan of these DIY IR goggles which appear to be made of a smart phone duct-taped to a pair of safety goggles and zip-tied to multiple straps.

[teaboot]

Clearly the engineering prowess of a scientist used to working with a USAmerican public school budget

[punished-venom-solitair-e]

everyone post your biggest hear me outs my friend just showed me two conventionally attractive white men in a row i need to teach him what a real hear me out is

[gardenofeden5457]

.world's largest excavator- nay, world's largest vehicle- the bagger 288

.also, scale reference! just the wheel is 70 feet in diameter

[halondrus]

[cutecipher]

can you put that thing on a leash?

[halondrus]

ok

[tapacamino]

This website: "It says a lot about a person if they write or make art about dark, horrific things. It says what they're like in real life. Hiding in plain sight."

Junji Ito:

[gertritude-art]

misc. project hail mary doodles

[wolfythewitch]

On my tenth cup of coffee getting dead wife flashbacks that never happened

[qin-shi-huang-di]

blocked blocked blocked blocked!

none of you possesses the mandate of heaven!

[king-sejong-the-great]

Blocks. . . as in BRONZE blocks!?

As in BLOCKS of moveable type!?

Brilliant! Such a technology would allow books to be reproduced en masse, without the need for laboriously reproducing books by hand! This would greatly increase the number of copies of books that we could create, as well as greatly reduce the incidence of copying errors!

OH! And if my new alphabetic syllabary takes off, then instead of hundreds of blocks for different ideograms, a case of printing blocks could include dozens of copies of each letter, thus allowing for more rapid deployment and a much more efficient storage of the printing blocks!

This could lead to a literacy revolution! We could mass produce texts for the common people! Everyone, not just the elite scholars, could study the works of the great Confucianist masters, thus increasing loyalty, filial piety, and virtuous behavior!

Brilliant!

[qin-shi-huang-di]

DELETE YOUR BLOG

[king-sejong-the-great]

Of course! Anything for the illustrious First Emperor of the Middle Kingdoms!

[king-sejong-the-great]

Update: I have consulted the court historians, and they have told me that it is not possible for me to delete official government records, and that my request to do so will be added to the sillok.

[qin-shi-huang-di]

ABDICATE!!!!

[qin-shi-huang-di]

FIRST KILL ALL THE COURT HISTORIANS AND THEN FUCKING ABDICATE

[qin-shi-huang-di]

AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION I AM NOT THE FIRS T EMPEROR OF THE '"MIDDLE KINGDOMS"" I AM THE FIRST EMPEROR PREIOD!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM THE GLORIOUS PROGENITOR THE FIRST OF THE FIRST A GOD AMONGST MEN I INVENTED THE FUCKING JOB THERE IS NONE BEFORE ME AND NONE WHO CAN MATCH ME I AM HEAVEN'S SPEACIAL BOY!!!!!!!!!!

[king-sejong-the-great]

Oh dear! I have addressed the First Emperor by an improper title! Such shame! Such an embarrassing gaffe! I shall ask the royal scholars to make the subject of my next royal lecture the proper forms of address in the Qin courts.

As for the other matter, I shall consult with the Jip Hanjeon for their advice in this matter.

[king-sejong-the-great]

After consulting with the great minds of my kingdom, it has been decided that committing mass murder of the court historians and fleeing the castle is not in line with the teachings of Confucius, and does not adhere to the concepts of benevolent governance.

[192929020202020]

[snailkites]

Crested Caracara being allopreened by two Black Vultures! This is such an interesting behavior and one that's typically one-way (preening by vultures to caracara). Here you can see the caracara either attempting to reciprocate but getting rebuffed by both vultures, or telling them to stop for now.

[Video source]

[teaboot]

Black Vulture couple locate Crested Caracara bisexual unicorn across the bar in a rare W for all parties

[13hemoglobin]

Actually wait I thought of more possible answers you may have for this question. So here is the same question with more possible answers

do YOU 🫵 take good nude pics? and be honest!

the best 👑

room for improvement

my pics are so bad they can make you stop being horny

my nudes are bad on purpose due to my humiliation kink

I have never taken a nude

I have an extremely complicated relationship with my nudes

Voting ended onAug 13

[neunhofferart]

Nearly pissed myself laughing earlier when I saw this absolute Looney Tunes truck attempting to transport an oversized mattress down the road with only a couple tiny bungee cords holding on for dear life, while it ballooned out behind the truck like a drag racing parachute:

[laropasucia]

[red-garden]

Bai Zhan doesn’t actually have an any medical supplies other than Liu Qingge’s industrial sized jar of tiger balm. Anything tiger balm can’t fix you’ll have to walk.

[sexygrammaticalerrors]

[andorology]

brooding men who cannot communicate their feelings if their life depended on it are only hot when they're fictional. if i have to deal with one in real life i will curse him and pray for his downfall every night before i go to bed

[kestrel-tree]

It's because the writer communicates their feelings for them. If people wanna pull that off in real life they need to hire a guy to walk around behind them narrating.

[bananonbinary]

#can i be the guy#ill narrate SO incorrectly#theyll all learn how to talk for themselves just to shut me up (via @cirrus-grey)

i'm loving the implication that this isn't something they hired you for, but something you'd do as some sort of public service.

[ahedderick]

[cepheusgalaxy]

"Doomed yaoi" this "doomed yuri" that what about doomed found family. What about finding comfort in these new people after going through so much on your own—a community, a solace, a home to come back to. Caring for them with all you've got, only to realize that it wasn't going to work, ever, no matter what you tried. Only to have it ripped apart, no matter how much you tried to hold them close. Found family that becomes lost family. Found family that takes your heart with it when they go.