Summary: First love comes true only for small percentage of people. You badly hoped it was the case with you too. But is it wise to fall in love with your best friend’s brother, who is 4 years older than you? There always seems to be a line you should not be crossing, but you are desperate to cross.
Warnings: Dom!Jungkook, Sub!reader, Yandere!jungkook, Smut, childhood crush, first love, First heartbreak, longing, friendship fluff, slice of life, explicit language, dirty talk, coercion, manipulative!JK, innocent virgin!reader, anxiety, social norms.
Word count: 4.4k
A/N: I am not a native-english speaker. I wrote the entire fic myself. Every small emotion and detail to their feelings. However, i used tools to polish the typos and a bit of grammar here and there. I was planning to upload the rough draft but i went with this at last. I thought i was passionate about writing, but throughout the writing process i discovered how difficult and crazy the whole process is. So i never started the love story i wanted to write. Instead, i went for PWP. Its my first and last time writing anything at all. So, am happy if this is enjoyed.
UPDATE: i feel motivated. So i will continue this fic.
Love stories are inherently beautiful things. Ever since you were a young teenager, you had desperately wanted one of your own. You daydreamed constantly about what it would feel like to fall deeply in love, to know the exact sensation of your chest fluttering with wild butterflies at the mere mention of a single name, the breathless thrill of a first kiss, and the intimacy of whispered, hushed secrets. It felt like the universal dream of every young girl, daydreaming about a charming boy from a distant land. In your case, however, that fantasy became entirely literal, though it ultimately arrived with a devastating cost.
You first met Jeon Jungkook when you were just a child, during one of the many joint picnics your parents planned with their absolute best friends. His parents had been incredibly close with yours since their own high school days. Because of that lifelong bond, you could only imagine how secure and relieved your parents felt leaving you to live in their family home for your upcoming university studies.
You had spent your entire childhood in the familiar streets of Busan, right up until your father suddenly moved the family to Washington for a major new work project. Just like that, you and your family had to leave everything behind, settling in America for the largest portion of your formative life.
Yuna, Jungkook’s younger sister, was exactly your age and quickly became the best friend you ever had. Growing up, the two of you played together constantly, sharing identical tastes in almost everything. Your days were filled with a chaotic mix of games, moving seamlessly from makeovers and cooking to intense rounds of Mortal Kombat and painting canvas after canvas. It truly felt like the two of you were destined to be best friends, perfectly mirroring the unbreakable bond of your parents.
In those early days, you were a naïve girl, much like Yuna, or perhaps, not entirely like her. While Yuna was quiet, she was profoundly observant, possessing the calm, steady personality of a textbook introvert. You, on the other hand, were by far the shiest person in your entire social circle. The mere thought of boys made you want to cower away entirely. You could call it a deep-seated social anxiety, or perhaps it was just the lingering after-effects of moving across the world at such a vulnerable, critical age, where trying to settle into a completely foreign environment and new social groups brought nothing but immense emotional challenges.
When it finally came time for higher education, you could have easily applied to any of the highly rated colleges in your local American district. However, the exact specialized course you planned to take was offered best at the prestigious Joon-sei College of Arts back in South Korea. Your family was deeply culturally rooted and exceptionally conservative. While they were open-minded in their own way, they were still a traditional Asian family at heart, meaning your parents expected a significant say in your life choices compared to the absolute freedom westerners your age enjoyed. It was never serious enough to make you feel suffocated, as they favored you immensely and rarely denied you anything, but it still took months of careful persuasion to convince them to send you across the ocean. At first, they were deeply anxious about how you would survive completely on your own. Those worries vanished the moment they learned you would be living safely at Yuna’s house, since the two of you had decided to attend the exact same college to pursue your mutual creative interests.
While you had missed Yuna terribly over the years, your time in America had been comforted by the arrival of another close friend. Mia was absolutely nothing like you or Yuna. She was a loud, unfiltered extrovert, the exact kind of person whose bold mouth could send any traditional elder in your home nation straight to an early grave. Mia routinely described her wild behavior as "stepping into the spicy chapter of adulthood," though to your sheltered mind, it sounded like plain filth. She never hesitated for a single second to put forth her thoughts; whatever entered her head immediately flew to the tip of her tongue.
You remembered one specific instance vividly, when you had invited Mia over for an early Christmas dinner, a tradition the two of you had shared a couple of times since your move. Sitting around the table, your mother warmly asked Mia what she wanted for Christmas. Your mother, being a traditional parent, never could have predicted the sheer audacity of the words that left Mia’s mouth.
Mia smiled brightly and said, "Oh! I wanna have sex. Lots! Lots. Of. Sex."
You choked violently on your glass of juice, your face burning as you seethed, "Mia!"
Glancing frantically at your mother, you watched her freeze dead in her tracks for two agonizing seconds, completely too baffled to form a coherent reply. Moving in an awkward silence, your mother simply placed two bowls of cereal onto the kitchen counter and murmured, "Maybe I will just get you a cute bag or a headset." You could only watch as your mother walked away, a stiff, deeply uncomfortable smile plastered on her face.
You desperately wished Mia understood just how deeply conservative your family truly was. In your household, sex was not just frowned upon; it was viewed as something strictly dirty and forbidden outside the boundaries of marriage. Although cultural views had shifted significantly during recent years, traditional families like yours still steadfastly refused to dishonor their heritage.
"Mia, are you serious?" you hissed fiercely the moment your mother was out of earshot. "Why would you say that to her?"
"Come on!" Mia scoffed, rolling her eyes. "How are they ever going to understand that these things are completely normal if you do not communicate? Do you seriously plan on going to college as a virgin?"
You let out a heavy sigh, rubbing your temples. "It is not about that. There are things you talk to your parents about, and there are things you simply do not."
Mia threw you a look of pure disbelief. "Oh, like this is some ancient taboo? Come on! This is 2026."
Brainwashed was not the word you would choose to describe yourself, but you were truly too rooted in your traditional life to ever dream of getting physical outside of a committed marriage. You did not consider yourself the most striking girl on your high school campus, but you were well aware of how you affected the opposite sex. Boys and grown men alike could not resist taking a lingering second look whenever you walked past. You had been approached by countless guys during your senior year for dates, and you might have actually said yes to one of them if it were not for the singular, devastating fact that you had been hopelessly in love with your childhood crush for as long as you could remember.
Jungkook had no official idea about the extent of your secret crush, but he loved to relentlessly tease you about how your cheeks turned bright red and how you transformed into a completely fluttery, nervous mess whenever he came near. He always told you he thought you were cute.
Even though your family had moved to the West when you were only in middle school, your parents never failed to organize a joint picnic at least once a year with Jungkook’s family. At this point, it had become a sacred annual tradition. Call it the curse of a first love, but you possessed an endless, consuming fascination with watching Jungkook. You spent those trips stealing secret, breathless glances at him. Every single year the families united, your attraction to him grew exponentially. It might have been your own romantic fantasy of falling in love, or it might have just been his magnetic presence, but you were down terribly bad. You would smile privately to yourself every single time his deep voice uttered your name, and you found it nearly impossible to maintain eye contact with him without your face flushing crimson.
He noticed everything. With time, Jungkook clearly figured out the nature of your crush. He found your reactions amusingly cute, even going so far as to buy you an ice cream cone as a quiet consolation prize when you experienced your very first heartbreak two years ago.
Jungkook was four years older than you, and during that particular annual picnic, he unexpectedly brought a girlfriend along. Before the familiar butterflies could even begin to flutter in your chest at the sight of Jungkook stepping out of the car, your heart shattered into pieces as you watched another person climb out of the passenger seat. The girl was undeniably beautiful.
He proudly introduced her to both of your gathered families. "Everyone, this is Jen. My girlfriend."
You were forced to sit there for what felt like agonizing hours, watching your family compliment her flawless looks while exchanging happy stories about how they met, where they lived, and everything in between. Yuna, being as deeply observant as always, was fully aware of your secret pining for her older brother. Seeing your distress, she quietly walked up behind you and wrapped her arms around you in a comforting hug. You wanted to cry, you wanted to cry so incredibly badly, but you forced yourself to stand up and walk away toward the lonely shoreline of the beach. You simply could not sit there and watch the romance unfold.
You loved Yuna with all of your heart, and there was nothing you looked forward to more each year than reuniting with your best friend. But as the years had passed and your feelings for Jungkook solidified into something intense and heavy, you had become even more thrilled for these annual meet-ups just to be near him. Now that it was painfully clear you had absolutely no hope of pining after an older college student, you resolved to finally move on from your feelings. It might have seemed silly to an outside observer, but a first love is never planned. It just happens in the most magical way, even if yours was destined to remain entirely unrequited.
Over the following years, your families continued to go on the exact same picnics, and you did your absolute best to ignore the ache in your chest. By the time this current summer picnic arrived, you came armed with a firm resolution. You had finally made peace with yourself, fully believing that the broken feelings of your first love would soon pass. You were able to let your mind cool, entering the vacation with a completely renewed mindset. You had to admit, it initially turned out to be the absolute best summer. You and Yuna had so much fun together that she actually started crying when it came time to bid each other goodbye. It had never been quite that emotional before, but that summer, it felt like the two of you had grown closer than ever.
Jungkook, however, was completely taken aback by you. Where did the quiet little cutie pie go? he found himself thinking. You were now a high school senior, and your body had developed much faster than those of your peers. Your old tomboy clothing had long been replaced by outfits that filled out your prominent curves perfectly. You were an absolute sight to look at. If you had realized just how frequently Jungkook was stealing dark glances at you, your firm resolve to move on would have broken instantly.
He began approaching you far too many times, making small talk, handing you snacks, and constantly interrupting your private time with Yuna just to ask about your life abroad, your friendships, and specifically, if you were in any relationships.
You froze the exact moment his deep voice asked if you were currently single. All of the intense, fluttery chaos you thought you had buried came rushing back into your chest. He watched your cheeks turn instantly red, a slow, amused smile spreading across his face. He clearly had the intention of changing the topic, but because you were such a captivating sight to look at, he decided to press your buttons just a little bit further.
"Have you had a first kiss yet?" he murmured.
Your eyes snapped up to catch his glance, noticing a dangerous, sharp glint in his dark eyes. He was deliberately teasing you.
Yuna immediately complained, stepping in to shield you. "Yah! What is with the interrogation? Leave us alone. We have a lot of things to talk about, so stop wasting our time."
Jungkook slowly stood up to walk out of the camp tent, throwing a small, wicked smirk over his shoulder, and you still could not seem to tear your eyes away from him.
Refusing to let you leave so soon, Yuna somehow convinced your parents to let you stay over at their family house for an extra week. Since it was only summer break, you decided it would be perfectly fine to spend the week at Yuna’s place, until you suddenly started to feel an intense, suffocating heat. It had nothing to do with the summer sun or the endless sports you played all day; it was entirely due to a heavy pair of eyes that seemed permanently fixed on your body. You caught Jungkook eyeing you way too many times over the first two days. He was always lingering nearby whenever you and Yuna were together. You could tell something fundamental had changed in him, but you were far too scared to point fingers or voice your suspicions.
Like that one sweltering afternoon, when you were playing a casual game of badminton with Yuna in the yard. As you bowed low to pick up the dropped shuttlecock, your skirt rode up high on your thighs. Jungkook was sitting right there in the outdoor lounge, silently watching the two of you giggle and play around. The sight physically affected him. For a split second, you caught his eyes darkening with pure, heavy lust before he quickly masked it, sending a charming smile your way and asking if you both wanted some lemonade, claiming he was about to go make some himself.
You turned around, entirely unsuspecting. "Yes! I am feeling so thirsty."
Yuna completely missed the way his lips moved as he stared directly at you, silently mouthing the words, “So am I.”
A violent, physical shiver ran straight down your spine at his bold antics. He slowly eyed you up and down with that exact same dark, predatory gaze, throwing you the ever-present smirk he had been carrying for the past two days. You felt your heart race in your chest. What was wrong with him?
The very next day, the three of you were playing in the family swimming pool. This particular summer had to be the hottest on record, because you were all losing your energy far too quickly to do anything that required excessive movement. Instead, you all chose to kick back and chill in the cool water. Yuna laughed loudly at your failed attempts to learn how to swim. You were an absolute scaredy-cat when it came to deep water; call it a petty fear or not, you were simply not a swimming enthusiast.
Jungkook, however, was absolutely not going to let it go. Without warning, his large hand submerged, pulling you deeper into the water by your ankle and immediately catching your waist to hold you flush against his chest so you would not drown. He laughed deeply as you thrashed around wildly in his muscular arms, begging him to let you go.
He insisted that swimming was fun and that he was going to personally teach you. When you realized he was not going to release you, you were forced to stick incredibly close to his body, terrified of slipping under. Your movements started awkwardly but quickly turned hilarious as you kept splashing around, forcing Jungkook to repeatedly hoist your body up just so you could breathe. Yuna and Jungkook were having the absolute time of their lives watching your funny attempts. You all laughed and played around in the sun for a while, the old comfort briefly returning.
Eventually, Jungkook’s mother called out from the house, asking Yuna to come grab the snacks she had freshly prepared. You watched your best friend leave the pool area, still laughing at your antics, leaving you entirely alone in the water to continue learning with Jungkook.
Just when you thought you were doing well, your deep fear of the water got the absolute best of you. You panicked, thrashing wildly again as you lost your footing. Jungkook let out a rich laugh and pulled you firmly against his hard chest to stabilize you. In the sudden chaos of tangled limbs, his broad palm accidentally brushed fully over the top of your bare breast.
You tried your absolute best to play it completely nonchalant, but you instantly saw him freeze, his dark eyes staring down at your chest for a beat longer than necessary. A sudden, heavy silence fell over the pool. Nervous and flushing hot, you pressed your palms against his bare chest, trying to push yourself away from him.
He immediately grabbed your wrist, locking you in place, and spoke in a low, gravelly voice. "Blushing much?"
You saw a faint, wicked smirk pull at his lips, his eyes deeply boring into yours. He was teasing you, pushing you right to the edge.
Over those past few days, you kept trying to tell yourself that you were just overthinking his behavior whenever you caught him flirting or staring. But the very next night, he left absolutely no room for doubt when he silently sneaked into your bedroom. Yuna had caught the worst of the intense summer heat and had fallen incredibly sick, fast asleep in her own room since early evening. You were profoundly surprised to see his tall frame slip through your door at such a late hour. He claimed he was merely walking by, saw the light shining from beneath your door, and decided to stop by for a little late-night chit-chat.
You did not give it much thought until he slowly, deliberately started to close the physical distance between you on the bed. To say your heart was racing would be a massive understatement.
"If I had known you would turn out to be this gorgeous," Jungkook murmured, his voice a low, raspy purr in the quiet room, "I would have waited a couple of years. You know?"
Your heart was hammering at an unstoppable speed. You had absolutely no idea how to change the topic or get him out. He was your best friend’s older brother, and more importantly, he was supposed to be someone else’s boyfriend. You were naïve, but you were definitely not stupid enough to miss exactly where he was heading with this. His intentions became entirely clear by the way his large, warm hand began to lazily graze the skin of your thighs. Under the dim amber glow of the bedside lamp, you caught the heavy, unadulterated look of lust in his eyes far too many times.
You desperately wished he would back off when you placed your trembling hands against his chest to push him away. But he kept leaning over you, his heavy frame hovering directly above yours, his dark eyes locking onto your lips. Slowly, deliberately, his physical weight coaxed and pushed you backward until your shoulders hit the mattress. His lips began to graze tauntingly over yours, delivering light, agonizingly hot brushes of skin. You were not thrashing around wildly like you had in the swimming pool, but you kept pushing against his broad shoulders with every ounce of strength you possessed.
He completely ignored your resistance, continuing to press his body down onto yours. "You grew up to be really irresistible," he murmured against your skin, his voice deep and entirely degrading to your innocence. "Your body was practically made to sin."
You were so incredibly nervous. You were far too conservative to even maintain direct eye contact with a boy, and here you were, being masterfully coaxed and forced into sleeping with him. Your back was pinned flat against the mattress as he applied a bit of firm pressure, his mouth suddenly crashing down to kiss you feverishly.
He began aggressively nibbling and sucking at your lips, the sloppy, wet sounds of his tongue taking over your mouth filling the quiet room with a sound that felt far too sinful for your ears. Every now and then, he would pull back just enough to staring into your wide, panicked eyes, completely amused by your helplessness. You did not even know how he was able to successfully convince you not to scream out for help or run from the room, but he took your virginity on that bed. He simply refused to hear a no. He smoothed over your panic by gently but firmly coaxing your body into the pooling desire, his lips completely assaulting your skin with deep kisses, heavy sucks, and wet licks all over your neck and chest.
The sheer intensity of it sent you completely overboard. You were far too nervous, hot, and overwhelmed to recollect every single explicit detail of the act, but you remembered crying out, "No, Jungkook. Please, no."
He kept leaning down, murmuring into your ear, "Baby, please. Do not deny me this. You are going to love it, I promise. How long are you planning to live under a rock? Let me show you what real pleasure feels like. You will like it."
"Jungkook, please no... it will hurt. And we cannot do this. Please."
But he did not stop at your desperate pleads. His invading, calloused hands efficiently stripped you entirely out of your clothes, roaming over intimate places on your body that you had never even touched yourself. He continued to mewl sweet, wicked nothings into your ear as his fingers gently but firmly spread your legs wide apart. To your panicked mind, it felt like a lifetime. It felt as if time had stopped entirely and the earth had ceased to spin.
You remembered tears spilling down your cheeks because his thick, rigid length simply would not fit into your tight, untouched opening. He let out a sharp hiss against your skin, his hips pressing forward as he gently but relentlessly coaxed your body into taking him. It felt sharp and painful for a long time, until he began whispering into your ear about how much he had dreaded the thought of not being able to possess you. He expressed exactly how shocked he was to find that the shy, squirmy little girl had grown into such a sexy, curvy, tempting vixen. He kept telling you how he fully deserved this sex with you, masterfully manipulating your mind into believing that you somehow owed him your virginity simply because of the childhood crush you had harbored for years.
You remembered how he kept fucking you all night long. He completely refused to leave your body after just one round. He gently but firmly coaxed you into letting him back between your aching legs for a second, intense round. After his final, shuddering orgasm, he fell completely flat on top of you. His massive weight was entirely crushing your small frame against the mattress, but all of your complicated, lingering feelings for him completely clouded your mind.
Panting heavily in the dark, you whispered, "So... you knew? All this while, you knew that I liked you?"
Jungkook looked down at your disheveled form, a smug, deeply satisfied smirk playing on his lips. "You were never good at disguising it, Y/N."
"Then why now?" you whispered, a heavy wave of guilt crashing over you. "You have a girlfriend. If you liked me back then, why didn't you say anything to me?"
Jungkook let out a dark, amused chuckle. "For your information, Jen and I are just friends with benefits. We are not serious at all. Of course, I was not going to introduce her to our parents as the friend I casually fuck."
You cringed deeply at his blunt, filthy words, but he merely pressed his heavy body closer against yours. "Look, your parents and mine... they always hoped you would end up with me anyway. It will not upset them if you did."
"But, isn't it wro--"
You were abruptly cut off as a sharp, involuntary moan left your lips. "Ah!"
You felt him growing thick and rigid inside you all over again. "Jungkook, stop... I do not think I can take one more."
"Oh yes you can, and yes you will," he whispered darkly against your ear.
Soon, his mouth crashed down to capture your lips, completely stopping any further protests before they could form. He reached out, pulling the heavy blanket completely over both of your tangled, sweating bodies.
"I am sorry, little one, but it is going to be a very long night," he growled against your mouth, his hips driving downward as he entered you again without a single warning. "Get used to it, because you have to satisfy these urges for the rest of your life."
"Jungkook, sto—Ah!"
The night was incredibly long, and his passion was entirely too strong. By the time morning arrived, you were forced to bear the heavy, dark marks of his lust all over your skin. He had not hidden them well at all, deliberately leaving deep purple love bites on the most visible places of your neck and collarbone. When it came time to pack, your mother was far too flustered and awkward to ask you directly about them, but she definitely took note of the hints, silently remembering your years of blushing around him.
The very next day, after you finally returned to America, you met up with Mia. The moment she saw you walk through the door, she gawked at you like she had just witnessed a ghost.
"Shut up!" Mia shrieked, her eyes blowing wide as she stared at the prominent marks peeking out from your collar. "Who in the world did you get with? Baby, spill everything right now!"
Looking at her wildly excited face, you let out a heavy sigh, realizing it was going to be an absolute nightmare dealing with her ecstatic ass now.
𐙚 Tropes : stepsiblings au, forbidden taboo love, angst, smut, grumpy x sunshine, small town, biker au, MC club au
𐙚 Word count : 3.8k
𐙚 Summary : where the line between hate and love gets too blurred for people who are, by all public rules, supposed to see each other as family.
Trigger warnings : This work of fiction contains darker themes such as taboo love and violence. Please read with your own caution and if you are uncomfortable and sensitive to dark themed romance and stepsiblings au, please refrain from reading this story. Thank you!
This story contains explicit content such as sexual scenes and language. Please do not interact if you are a minor!
This is a work of fiction with no intention of harming the artist image.
𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 (𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐫) | 𝐈𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 (𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟎𝟐)
I love starting my day with a morning sex. It makes you giddy and puts you in a good mood for the rest of the day. You always know it's going to be a good day if you start it with a good morning sex. A morning quicky definitely counts as well.
Does this count as a morning sex though? We've been tangled up with each other, pretty sure since it was still dark outside. Now the sun is out, birds are singing, and my family is definitely awake. I heard mom getting up before we started this round. And shortly after, the rest of the family and my siblings followed, forcing us both to keep it as quiet as humanly possible in our situation. Morning sex puts you in a good mood but one thing that will definitely ruin the rest of your day is one of your family members hearing you having sex with your boyfriend through the walls and walking in on you. Yeah, that will definitely ruin your day.
The sound of my baby brothers gets louder on the other side of the door - definitely jumping up and down on the stairs - and so does the sound of my moans. It takes every ounce of self control to keep the moans inside but it's getting to the good parts, where the orgasm is deliciously building up and the motherfucker is hitting all the right spots as he speeds up the thrusting of his hips but also trying not to make so much sound. It would impossible to not hear the two of us if someone pressed their ear to the door. I prayed to all the lords out there that one of my little brothers wasn't doing that because controlling my moans was getting so hard, I had to press my palm to my mouth.
Rowan's breathing was getting heavier just like mine. I closed my eyes, trying to chase that feeling I've already experienced three times this morning. I couldn't even focus on the noises from outside my bedroom anymore. I really should've though, incase one of my shitheads of a brother got too close to the bedroom or even worse, one of my parents.
I was getting closer and closer when someone knocked on the door. Rowan's movements stopped and so did my heart. I opened my eyes and looked into my boyfriend's eyes which were just as nervous as mine. I waited couple of seconds for a sound from the other side of the wall, not even daring to breath or make a peep.
"Daisy, sweetie?" My mom finally called out after what felt like ages to my fast beating heart.
"Yes, mom?" I tried to not sound too shaky and breathy but it was impossible considering not only I was so close to be having an orgasm, my heart was falling down to my ass from the fear of my mom seeing us like this.
"The table is set honey. We're gonna start having breakfast."
Now that i was positive my mom wasn't planning to barge inside my room, i urged my boyfriend to start moving again, tightening the hold my legs had around his torso. There was no way we were leaving this room without the best orgasm we were getting this morning.
Even though Rowan started his movements slowly again, i tried to even my voice and called back to my mom.
"Okay mom, I'll be right there."
I closed my eyes again once Rowan's thrusts started to get that beautiful rhythm, gently fucking me against my bedroom wall. I let out a silent moan when he stared to kiss the sensitive spot on my exposed neck.
"Okay. And tell Rowan to come downstairs too. He doesn't have to keep sneaking around through the window. We have a door, you know."
My eyes snapped open just as Rowan's movements came to a halt. He snapped his head up and looked at me with his wide and mortified eyes.
"How long has she known I was here?" He whisper-yelled panicky.
I covered my eyes with both hands, mortified to an inch of my life. I had a close relationship with my mom. The kind that your mom was a friend to you. You went to them when you went through a problem - even boy related - and they comforted you and gave you advice.
But definitely not the type where she knew exactly what I was doing with my boyfriend in the next room. Nope. Never had crossed that line.
Until now, apparently.
Rowan dropped his head on my shoulder before I dropped my hands at my sides too. I guess we both agreed we where not getting that fourth orgasm.
After he pulled out and we cleaned ourselves, trying to look presentable to parents that knew what was happening behind close doors to their seventeen year old daughter (even though that was impossible because how can you fully look presentable and not like you've been having sex for hours) we gathered the courage to leave the safety of my bedroom.
Just as I closed my bedroom door behind me, Rowan turned around to face me.
"Seriously, be honest. I don't look inappropriate, right? Is my face still flushed? Because if I show up to your stepfather, looking like I just had sex with his only daughter, I don't think I'll ever be able to look the man in the eye."
"No, Rowan. Again, you look completely normal. And it doesn't matter anyway because now not only my parents, but even Jongho knows what you were doing in my room so early in the morning." I smile sweetly at him, trying to soften the ruthless thruth of my words with a sweet smile.
Yeah, my thirteen year old stepbrother will take one look at us and will know what exactly was going on. He's a kid but he's not stupid. He's very smart, actually. Too smart for his own good.
"Thanks babe, you're really helping right now." He says flatly with no humor.
"Don't worry. No one's gonna cut your dick off. Just go downstairs and get this over with." I urge him to move towards the stairs.
"Yeah, and we should remember to never sneak in your bedroom to have morning sex ever again." He says quietly over his shoulder as he goes downstairs.
"Definitely." I agree as I follow him, but something catches my attention that stops me in my track before I move to the stairs.
Someone, actually.
Jungkook, my older stepbrother. My only older stepbrother.
I just stand there and stare at him, trying to remember if he was standing there when we left my room. I definitely never saw him up so early before. He wasn't an early bird, and even if he was i wouldn't know since he spends his entire day ethier out or locked up in his bedroom.
He stands by the window next to his bedroom door. Holding a staring contest with me, apparently. The more we stand there and hold the stare, the more uncomfortable I get by the dark look he's giving me. Something is wrong. He's not just looking at me like usual, like he's annoyed by even the sound of my breathing. I might be imagining things because of our distance. And it's so subtle because the bastard is so good at controlling his micro-expressions and is a master at holding a poker face, but I swear he's glaring at me. His eyes looking like they're cursing me from the distance and his arms crossed over his chest while he leans a little towards the wall next to the window.
I have no I idea what his problem could be. Usually when he's being an asshole to me, it's half-way through the day which means he has had some time to find something to get frustrated with me for. But we literally just saw each other for the fisrt time today. I can't have possibly gotten that good at walking on his nerves if he's already annoyed by me the fisrt few minutes we see each other.
He still has not backed out from our imaginary staring contest and well, neither have I.
"What? Why are you standing there looking at me like that?"
He doesn't respond. Just stares - slash glares - darkly at me.
"Seriously, what is your problem? Can't you wait a few hours to be a dick? We literally just woke up."
"And yet I've been awake for hours." He finally speaks. His voice showing no sign of a sleepy hoarse or raspiness, Just his usual low and gentle, slightly husky warm voice.
"So? What does that have to do with me? I don't care when you start your day, just don't ruin mine so early."
He pushes off the wall and walks toward me, that look he's been giving me not leaving his eyes.
He stands close to me, actually close enough that I enter his scent bubble, getting faint whiffs of the familiar scent I know him by. His right shoulder faintly brushes my right shoulder which for a few seconds made me want to step away from him. Like he has a disease or fire I might catch if I'm too close to him. Which is funny because he's the one usually feeling that way about me.
"You were the one that sneaked your dumb spoilt excuse of a boyfriend in and fucked like bunnies against my bedroom wall." He says in a low voice, like he doesn't want our parents or our brothers accidentally hear him say such words to me. "If you don't want me to be a dick to you, stop fucking against my wall and wake me up with your fake-ass moans."
Then he leaves before I can open my mouth and shot back a response. He circles around me and goes down the stairs.
Fake? Fake?! What the fu-
If I wasn't busy trying to pick up my jaw by his audacity, I would've pushed him off the very same stairs.
Okay, I probably wouldn't because I don't know how to explain that to my stepfather, that I killed his son right under his nose, but a girl can plot an imaginary murder.
I took a deep breath. The day is just getting better and better. It's like universe is punishing me for enjoying the fisrt few hours of my day too much.
I go downstairs anyway because I have a hungry and grumbling stomach and a boyfriend who is with my entire family all alone by himself.
Downstairs, I'm met with my seven year old twin half brothers who won't sit normally on their chairs and have to keep getting up and beat each other, my stepfather who is busy doing a cross-word on a newspaper (who uses a newspaper nowdays anyway?) My thirteen year old stepbrother too occupied with his iPad and my very awkward and uncomfortable boyfriend just standing there in a corner and not sitting with my family.
Yes I have quite a crowded family. I didn't use to have this kind of family when i was a child. I used to be an only child. It always had been just me and mom. So you could say it was kind of hard for me to get adjusted to the new crowded family once my mother married my stepdad who already had two sons from his former marriage.
Jungkook was ten and Jongho was only one when their mother passed away. Three years later their dad and my mom got married. I really didn't mind it, though. I liked my stepdad, even when I was only eight. He was nice to me and he treated me with a gentle and loving fatherly manner just like he treated his own sons. Like I was the daughter he wanted but never had.
I could say it seemed easier for me to get used to another parent than it was for his sons, since I had never experienced a father figure in my life and at that age I was craving it. And honestly, Jongho was too young to even remember anything about his mother. For all he remembered and cared about, my mom was his real mom too, since she was the one that raised him since he was four.
But Jungkook was a different story. He actually remembered his mother. I never heard him talk about her personally because since if it wasn’t obvious, we don't have the best relationship, but it's obvious that he never forgot her and always kept a special place for her in his heart where no one was allowed. According to my stepfather, at least.
But that didn't mean that he didn't know my mom as a mother figure ethier because just like my stepfather, my mom treated and raised Jungkook like he was her own biological son. So even if he never vocaly admitted it, he had a soft special spot for my mom too.
Mom and dad worked really good as parents. They knew how to be a team on the harder days. Knew how to be there for us not only as parents, but as our friends too. They were good parents which meant they weren't weird about it when I started going out with Rowan. They approved of him since he came from a respectful family of lawyers. Honestly, the only thing that was important to my stepdad was that my boyfriend wasn't a drug using addict. And Rowan definitely wasn't one.
I walked to his side, my hand naturally going to hold his in an incouraging way. My stepdad seemed to just notice that my boyfriend was standing in his dining room. He dipped his chin and looked at him over his glasses before he greeted him.
"Oh, hi Rowan. Where did you come from?"
"Hello Mr. Jeon. I actually just got here." Rowan politely answered my dad, but one could totally notice the fluster in his voice if they paid attention. The boy will expose what we were busy doing not fifteen minutes ago like a moron.
"You two must be really hungry. Let's all sit and eat." Mom said with a teasing tone in her voice as she put a plate filled with star-shaped waffles and a bottle of maple syrup for the twins on the table.
Rowan shifted uncomfortably on his feet, catching the knowing comment mom through at our way before moving to sit on an empty chair. I rubbed his hand in silent support and sat down next to him.
Just as mom sat down in her own seat, Jungkook came from the kitchen with his black mug in his hand, steams of hot coffee coming out of it. He always drank coffee in the mornings. Black and no sugar. I couldn't understand how he prefers his coffee this way for the life of me. How could someone truly think that tasted good?
He didn't stop when he noticed us in the room, but he narrowed his eyes at me in a way that only I noticed it and gave an even darker look to my boyfriend.
This guy is unbelievable!
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch up. When did you exactly get here?" Dad asked Rowan with confusion, clearly not letting go of that topic.
Jungkook beats Rowan before he gets a chance to come up with a respond that wouldn't offend his girlfriend's stepdad and save him from having this conversation again, and talks to his dad instead.
"Oh he got here hours ago." The rat says before sitting on his seat at the other end of the table, smiling sweetly (and very fake one) at Rowan. "Yeah, Daisy's boyfriend is getting really good at sneaking in through the window. Almost didn't here him last night when he entered Daisy's bedroom."
He finishes the last part with a very fake-ass impressed and sweet tone, not having that sweet tone because he's actually impressed with Rowan or is happy to see him here, but to kindly rat us out to dad.
Dad snapped his head at our direction. "I'm sorry, what now?" Dad asked with his eyes bulging out, still dumbfounded about what happened under his roof.
I narrow my eyes and throw daggers at Jungkook with my glare, cursing the fucker with every swear words in the book. And he just widens that smile at me before his expression goes back to that usual blank, unreadable one while shaking his hot coffee mug.
"I didn't know you pressed your ears to my bedroom wall every night to hear what I'm doing, Jungkook. Seriously, that's real creepy. Even for you." I shoot back at him but still somehow manage to get that sweet venomous tint to my voice on place.
Now his scowling expression is back and we're having our glaring contest again.
My boyfriend is evidently speechless, not knowing how to respond in this awkward situation my stepbrother put him into. That's when mom beats him into it. "We didn't come from behind the rock. We knew exactly what you two were doing..." that's when dad jumps in and mutters. "I didn't know. I don't ever want to know." Mom ignores him and continues. "But I really hope you two are careful and are using protection. You both are too young for babies and I'm definitely too young to be a grandma." Mom warns seriously, no humor in her voice.
"Mom!" I hang my head in embarrassment. Not believing we're having a conversation about my sex life in front my family and baby brothers.
"I'm being serious, little miss. I don't want a little version of you running around calling me 'granny' when I still have these two Godzillas to run after." She points to my little twin brothers who still have not managed to eat two bites because they just won't shut up.
"I can assure you Mrs. Jeon, you're not going to have a grandchild. We're not doing anything like that." Rowan assures my mom, mortified by this conversation probably even more than I am.
"Yes. So please, can we change the subject?" I try to put an end to the conversation these people don't seem to let go.
"Just saying. The last time a teenage girl got pregnant in this town, she and her family disappeared for months and when they showed up again, her mom claimed the the baby was actually hers, not her daughter's. And I'm telling you already, I'm not doing that if you get pregnant."
"Mom!" I drop my face in to my palms. I should have never left my room.
"How did everyone know the baby wasn't hers if the family did disappear for months?" Jongho suddenly raises his head and asks curiously, apparently more interested in this conversation than his iPad.
"Honey, it was obvious." Mom states like it's as obvious as day being light and night being dark.
"I genuinely don't care for this topic. Can we talk about something else?" Dad says uncomfortably and I want to plant a smooch on his forehead for saving me.
"Of course, love. How about our schedules for the day. You have to take the twins to their sports class. And I have some errands to run before my shift. Jongho, honey, do you have anything to do for today?"
He shakes his head absently, absorbed with his iPad and gaming again.
"Okay. Daisy, how about you?"
"I have a nail appointment with Kim. I'll be going to the mall for a few hours."
"What time you're leaving? Do you need a ride?"
"It's okay, Mrs Jeon. I'm giving her a ride to the mall." Rowan answers mom.
"Oh thanks, dear."
My boyfriend smiles at my mom but when he goes to get back to his breakfast, he suddenly stops, trying hard to not waver his gaze. I follow his line of sight and am met with Jungkook's hard and heavy stare. His eyes slightly narrowed and his favorite scowl glued to his brows.
God, had he been sending daggers our way the entire time? Will he fucking quit?
I snapped back with a frustrated look, tired of his dick-head attitude. Even when I have girls and guys friends over, he won't give his face a rest. Like me and every person I'm acquainted with are the most annoying, insufferable people he has ever seen.
Some guys I liked had literally been scared off by him and the looks he gives people in the past. The fact that now, he's in a motorcycle club and literally dresses like a character fresh out of a nineties motorcycle-gang movie and rides a god-damned Harley Davidson bike really doesn't help with some people shitting themselves when he's around.
Okay, no one has ever really shit themselves because of him, but some of Jongho's old bullies came real close.
We resume eating while mom goes through the rest of the day's plan when Jungkook gets up from the table, takes his mug to the kitchen and rinses it and goes upstairs. Few minutes, he comes downstairs, dressed in his usual leather jacket and putting his riding gloves on. He goes to the entrance door and puts his boots on.
"I'm going out. Don't know when will be back." He lazily announces, more to mom and dad while he picks his keys from the bowl next to the door.
"Okay, sweetie. Be safe." Mom replies as dad says, "Bye."
He shots the door behind him. Moments later, the beastly sound of his Harley roars to life as he leaves to God-knows where.
We sit quietly for few beats before I break the silence. "Okay then. Everyone will be off to their own things. We should probably get going to." I look toward Rowan. And we get up to leave the table when dad's voice stops us in our track.
"You are very welcome to visit, Rowan, but if you're going to come into my house please start using the door and not my daughter's window." He says without moving his eyes from his paper, unimpressed with today's shenanigans.
"Uh, yes sir. Of course." Rowan gives a tight smile and we go upstairs as fast as possible before we face another embarrassment for today.
While I try to get ready in my room, and my boyfriend is slumped on my bed, the heels of his palms pressing against his eye sockets, I know I jinxed it. Starting today with sex didn't mean today was going to be a good day. It went the exact opposite.
Or maybe because three times a charm and we should've stopped after that third orgasm.
Hope you enjoyed ♡ 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 (𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐫) | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 (𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟎𝟐)
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Summary: You decide to take an amateur boxing class. Come to find out the teacher is a jerk but his pretty best friend wants to get to know you better.
| Pairing |: Buff!Jungkook x Reader x Buff!Taehyung
| Genre |: smut!
| Warnings |: swearing, drinking, smoking, mean jungkook, use of pet names, mild violence, teasing, threesome, penetration, dpv, creampie, deepthroat, hair pulling, scratching, biting, size difference, big dick taekook, sub jungkook, boys kissing, slapping, nipple play
✧˖°── .✦────☼༺☆༻☾────✦.── °˖✧
I was at the gym working out my arms, my least favorite. I preferred doing abs and legs. I came here at least three times a week sometimes more, sometimes less but I was here a lot. I knew all the gym regulars sometimes talk to them, but I mostly kept to myself.
Today a new class started boxing classes. They took place in one of the free use rooms. This is a recent development and it interested me.
Seeing my love for combat sports it was only natural that I decide to hop in for the class. My arm workout was a good warm up before some boxing.
Now i’ve tried boxing before, but it wasn’t fully committed and wouldn’t consider myself an expert. I had about 20 minutes before the class started and the room was empty so I thought I’d get some pre-practice in.
I walked into the room in a long sleeve compression shirt and baggy sweats lazily hanging around my hip. No one seems to be there yet. I take out the hand wrap from my bag and tightly secure it onto my hands. He walked up to one of the punching bags.
One hit after another. The sound of your fist hitting the bag was so satisfying the burn on my knuckles was delightful.
“We have a class that starts soon.” A voice cuts through the sound of the impacts.
I stop to look where the voice came from. It was some guy he had a beanie on and an all black workout outfit. He was carrying a box of boxing gear and a motorcycle helmet.
“Yea I know. I thought I’d get a few in before the class started. You know, warm up?”
“Yea ok. Could you maybe move your stuff.” He gestures to my things.
“Oh. Yea sure.” What’s with this guy I thought. He wasn’t being like super rude but passive aggressive enough to where it ticked me off. Assuming he’s the teacher though I let it go.
More people started coming in. It more people than I initially thought. Everyone got ready and chatted before Mr. Grumps takes over.
“ Welcome everybody to our first official class. this is a beginners class and I am your teacher Jungkook. Everybody get to a bag I’ll bring you gear. If you already have gear then good for you.” His name sounded familiar but I didn’t care enough at the moment to give a damn.
I walk over to the nearest punching bag but someone beat you to it. The teacher he just walked right in front of me.
“Excuse me?” I say. The turns around with an uninterested look on his face.
“What?” He says annoyed putting on his gloves.
“You just completely cut me off.” I say getting more and more pissed at the man.
“Sorry guess I didn’t see you there.” He apologizes but was clearly not sorry. He don’t even move.
“Are you gonna stand the and stare at me or you gonna find a bag princess?” I scoff. Who does this guy think he is. What an asshole.
I roll your eyes going up to another bag.
————————————————————————
I thought this was gonna be fun, but this guy was nitpicking at everything you do. I stand too close to that, my posture is wrong, my face looks funny!?
He’d poke at my belly, push the back of my knees, and glare at me from across the room. What is seriously wrong with him?!
It was the first class and you already hated him.
“You’re not focused.” His voice punches through my thoughts. He walks away with a smug grin on his face.
“Maybe I would if you weren’t so damn annoying.” I mumble under my breath while sending a few jabs to the punching bag.
He turns around clearly pissed.
“I’m sorry what was that princess?” I ignore him. I couldn’t care less right now. I just wanted to hit things not listen to a pompous asshole.
“Hey I’m talking to you.” He says in a dangerously low voice. I sigh as I stop punching.
“What your problem dude? You’re here to teach not to be on my ass all the time.”
“If you don’t like the way I teach then you can leave princess.” I glared at the man. I shoulder check him as I pass him.
“Prick.” I grab my things and leave. I was so angry I didn’t realize there was someone in front of the door.
I bump into a hard chest. I look up at who I bumped into. Boy was he beautiful. His face looks unreal like a Greek statue. He had glasses framing his beautifully brown eyes.
“Sorry, I didn’t see you there.” His baritone voice plays like a melody in my ear. Before I could answer someone calls out to him.
“Taehyung! I didn’t think you were coming.” A certain annoying prick of a teacher jogs over to the man I now know as ‘Taehyung’.
Of course he knew him. Before he could address me I push past the door leaving the mean behind.
————————————————————————
It was a couple days later and the second class. I was debating on going. Do I show up a prove that I’m not a push over or do I fully ignore his existence?
I decided to go.
I wasn’t gonna let that asshole control my life.
I walk into the class early again. This time I was sporting so boxing shorts with the name ‘Nightmare’ on the back and a compression shirt. I did a little bit of underground MMA so I had my own gear and clothes. I didn’t some digging into ‘Jungkook’ and now I know why he sounded familiar.
He went by the name ‘Bunny’ and he was big. He dominated the ring. He specialized in boxing but that didn’t make him bad in anything. He was a monster. So what the hell id he doing here teaching a novice class?
I decided to warm up with some Muay Thai it was one of my least favorites to do but most favorite to watch. It was brutal but precise.
A scoff echoes in the room.
“Didn’t think you’d be back after you threw a tantrum.” I ignore him continuing my warm up.
“What are we doing the silent treatment now?" He leans in closer to me but I continue to beat up the punching bag. A hand grabs my wrist out of instinct I grip his arm throwing him over my shoulder.
I roll over him attempting to put him in a headlock but he was quick rolling over with me.I kick his torso locking my legs around his neck. He pins my wrists next to my head. I fight under his hold but he was strong but the longer he held me the tighter my thighs got around his neck.
Panting I glare at him. He looked back at me with the same intensity almost like he knew something. both of our breaths fill the silence.
"Am I interrupting something?" A deep voice cuts through the tension. I feel his hands loosen around my wrist and I took the opportunity, to flip him on his back legs still wrapped around him.
"Tap out." I say
He scoffs, "You wish." His face was red but still prideful.
"Think you better let him go." Taehyung saunters over.
"Why? So he can be a pain in the ass?"
"No, so he can breath honey. He's getting red in the face."
"Uhgg." I stand up releasing him from my hold.
"So, I was right." Jungkook rasps as he stands.
"What that I would beat your ass? Congrats." I start to walk away from him.
"Wanna tell me why the Demon of the ring is in my beginner boxing class?" Well It's not like I was trying to hide it. Maybe I left a few details out.
I didn't just dabble in the underground world. I ruled it. I was dubbed Demon of the ring. Maybe I was an S class champion, maybe I made a lot of money, and maybe I outsmarted the company that owned me. Later Jungkook took my title.
"Stalker much?" I turn around.
"I do my research."
"Right. Well to answer your question, for fun. I'm exercising my free will." I unwrap my knuckles.
"Now how much freedom does a street rat have huh?" I feel him walk closer.
"You don't wanna go there Bunny. Trust me." I pick up my things and leave. I was emotionally drained at this point. I leave the building walking to my bike.
"Wait!" I roll my eyes turning to the man.
"I'm sorry about him. He just gets fired up over these things. He loves a good competition." Taehyung apologizes for his friends actions. He seems genuine and he was cute enough for me to believe him.
"At this point I could care less." I put my motorcycle helmet on and securing my bag on my back.
"Please let me buy you coffee." He tilts his head walking in front of my bike. I sigh flipping my visor up to look at him. He has such a sad look on his face. This boy was playing the puppy dog eyes on me and it was working.
"Fine." And before I could say anything else-
"Oh wonderful! Here's my number! I text you ok!" He shoves a piece paper into my hand practically jumping. I couldn't get a word before the boy ran off.
Wow ok that just happened. So I fought a man who hates me and knows my past and his sweet best friend just asked me out.
————————————————————————
It was time I was gonna go and meet the boy for coffee. It was a warm summer day so I went with some mini jorts and a cute blue tank layered under a cropped baggy shirt.
I put on my shoes and headphones and I head out the door. The coffee shop was close by so I said I would walk over.
I walk down the lively street with my music blasting in my ears. It felt good to kind of drown out the world around me and to feel like myself.
I walk into the place it was small but cute. My kind of place.
I feel a tap on my shoulders, I turn around taking my earphones off.
"Hey! I'm glad you came!" He says with pep and joy plastering his face with a warm boxy smile. I look him up and down. He was wearing an button down shirt with the first couple button undo paired with some light wash jorts. He had the same glasses on as when I first saw him.
He looked good to say the least. He was built and tall and most of all sweet. How can this sweet beautiful boy be best friends with that spawn of satan?
"Yea for sure." I say genuinely.
"So what are you getting today?" He asks. He was really good at preventing any akward moments.
"I'm torn between a matcha latte and some sort of refresher, What about you?" I ask politely.
"I was thinking a cold tea of some sort. To be honest I don't really like coffee."
"You asked me out to coffee and you hate coffee?" I poke at him
"Well it was the first thing I thought of." He says turning his face away in embarassment.
"Its cool, I don't really like coffee either." We both laugh at ourselves.
He paid for the drinks but it wasn't easy, I was fighting him for a good while before he pulled the puppy dog eyes on me.
We decided to take a walk outside with our drinks seeing that it was a really nice day.
"So, how did you and Jungkook become friends? You guys seem very different." I decided to ask my burning question.
"We actually met in the ring." I can say I wasn't exactly expecting that.
"Did you win?" He laughs
"Nope he was a strong kid. After that match I went up to him and asked him to be my friend. It took a lot of harassment to convince him." He smiles at the memory.
"You guys must be close then."
"Oh yea, we're practically attached by the hip. We do everything together."
"Everything? So he knows you asked me out?" I tease him.
"W-well not exactly no." He rubs his neck. I smile at the cute display. Despite his best friend being a total jackass he really cares for him.
"And why is that?" I poke further
"Because I wanted to talk to you, alone. And I know you guys don't exactly get along. But! I would like us all too! You seem really cool and he is my best friend so." Man he is adorable!
"Well if you really want, I am free tomorrow and i'll try to get along with him. For you, ok?" The words left my mouth before my brain could catch them, this was a pretty bad idea.
"Really!?" He grabs my hands, "You mean that!?" He pulls me closer.
"Yea of course." Shit why am I saying that?!
He wraps my up in a tight hug pushing me into his chest, "This is gonna be awesome! I promise!" He sways and jumps in excitement.
What did I get myself into?
————————————————————————
Here I was dressed up at a bar waiting for the two best friends to arrive. I was in a mini skirt with a nice y2k tank. I had done my hair and makeup better than anticipated. I didn't go put much but I’m not new to the scene.
The boys picked out a really nice club, it was elegant yet fun. I was sipping on my drink when I caught a woman's eyes staring at me across the bar.
She was sipping on a cosmo making eyes at me. She seemed to give in walking up to me. She was in a dangerous red dress with matching red heels.
"How are you doing gorgeous?" Her sultry voice overpowers the loud music.
"I"m doing alright and yourself?" I look her up and down.
"So good, especially seeing a cute girl like yourself, tell me. Wy are you here alone?"
And before I could answer-
"She isn't alone." a tattooed arm snakes around my shoulder. I look up to see Jungkook glaring at the attractive woman. With Taehyung right behind.
And with that the woman scurried away. I was disapointed, even if it wasn't for real it still is fun to flirt especially with a hot lady that wants you.
"Why'd you do that?" I shrug his arm off. I recieve no answer from him.
"Sorry about that, we wanted to make sure you were doing alright." Taehyung answers for him.
“Thank you but I didn’t need it.” I go back to sipping my drink.
“She was gonna snatch you up princess.” Jungkook takes a seat next to me
“Right and I’m an underground world champ, I think I could’ve handled it.”
“Come one guys let’s not fight ok?” Taehyung tries to deescalate the situation. I sigh. I should at least try and get along for Tae.
“Well why did you invite me here? What so special about it?” It was more than a nightclub
“I thought it would be fun to loosen up a bit, you both are always so serious. Plus I own the place.” I freeze.
“What?” I say surprised
“Yep this place is mine!” He says with a huge proud smile.
“Well you did a good job with it.” I compliment him. He hugs me suddenly.
“I’m so glad you like it!” He nuzzles into my neck
“Will you get off of her already.” A grumpy voice breaks the hug and he pulls Taehyung off of me like a naughty puppy.
“Round of shots on me!” The puppy shouts
————————————————————————
It was a couple shots and several drinks later. I’m usually really good with my alcohol and tonight I was a little more drunk than I anticipated.
I was out on the dance floor, my favorite part of any party. I was swaying my hips and jumping with the music blaring in my ears.
Taehyung found me in the crowd, he was drunker than I was stumbling through the crowd.
“Baby! I found you!” His hands fall to my waist as he sways with a drunk smile on his face. He was so cute and it was nice seeing him be happy.
“Are you having fun?” I lean to his ear my handing finding his arms to steady myself with. I feel him muscles flex under my touch.
“So much fun! I’m so glad you came!”
“Me too!”
A familiar tattooed arm finds its way around my shoulder again. I look up through my lashes to find a tipsy Jungkook. His lip piercing sparkles under the neon lights, I didn’t notice until now.
“Who knew the Demon likes to dance.” He says in my ear. His breath sends a wave of chills down my spine making me hyper aware of Taehyung hands around my waist.
The crowd pushes me closer to them. My face practically in Taehyung’s chest while I feel Jungkook’s chest on the back of my head.
I can’t tell if it’s the alcohol but it was getting hot and I became aware of the forced proximity. These men were bigger than I remember.
We moved together with the music. I look up to find Taehyung already staring at me but he’s seemed different. The sureness in his eyes while looking at me. Not to mention the man was beautiful. I felt enraptured and willing.
I look behind me and I catch Jungkook’s eyes only for him to look away. Another sight I haven’t seen. Jungkook being nervous.
“I think we should get some air.” Taehyung says. He grabs my hand and I instinctively grab Jungkook’s as Taehyung leads up through the dancing crowd. He takes up a flight of stares to a secluded part of the club. We went through a pair of doors which opened up to a balcony.
The sight was stunning. The city was glowing. And maybe it was my drunken eyes but I swore I saw a shooting star.
I lean on the railing taking a cigarette and my lighter out. I try to light it but it was out.
“I don’t know you smoked.” Taehyung says as he leans on the railing next to me.
A lighter flicks on in front of me, Jungkook was holding out a light for me. I look at him as he lights my cigarette. I inhale the smoke before blowing it out.
“There is a lot you don’t know about me.” I say with the cigarette between my lips.
“So mysterious, princess.” Jungkook slides next to me with his own cigarette in hand.
“I could say the same about you guys. I met you about what? A few weeks ago?” A cold breeze washes over me.
“Well I’d love to find out more.” Taehyung leans in closer. I smile.
“Me too.” The taste of the cigarette lingers in my tongue, I love a drunk cigarette. I feel the heaviness in my eyes.
“One thing I’d like to know is if you have a boyfriend?” I let out a little laugh
“No I don’t.” I say it like it was obvious
“Why? Is it because you’re a pain in the ass.” Jungkook says, I roll my eyes.
“No it’s because they can’t handle me.”
“You are a handful for sure.” I slap his arm playfully.
“Says you, I bet you don’t have a girlfriend either.” He sends a knowing smirk towards Taehyung
“You’re right but I do have a boyfriend.” He says nonchalantly. I was surprised to say the least and dare I say it, jealous?
“You don’t say.” I say still a but stunned
“What about you Taehyung?” I turn towards him.
“I have a boyfriend too!” Ok maybe wasn’t expecting that.
“Oh that’s nice.” I try to sound happy but I was disappointed. I thought he liked me at least a little bit.
“He’s right there.” He points to Jungkook who just lets a smirk slip through.
Ok definitely wasn’t thinking that was gonna happen. So these two sexy hot boys get to kiss each other. Men take everything.
“You guys didn’t tell me?”
“Well we wanted to do something first.” They walk closer to me. Like a predator stalking its prey. They look down at me. I can feel my cheeks flush and my heart beat a little faster.
“What?” I say almost embarrassingly breathless.
Taehyung admires me,his fingers play with my hair. While Jungkook traps me with an arm places on the railing behind me. He plays with his lip piercing as his eye burn into mine.
“We wanted a certain little demon to become ours.” My breath leaves my body. They both want me? And they are dating?
“ ‘ours’ as in both of you?” I shakily ask looking between them.
“Yes princess. As in both of us.”
“And you two are together? And you want me?”
“Yes and yes. I know this is a lot but would you please give us a chance? We don’t bite.” Taehyung gives me his sweet puppy dog eyes again. Leaning almost 2 inches away from my face.
“Unless you want us too.” Jungkook growls leaning in the same way.
“Are you sure you can keep up?” I say with sudden confidence.
“I know we can.” Jungkook shoots back the same energy. He nose almost touching mine.
My breathing gets a little uneven as I weigh my options. The alcohol was still in my system but I know I want it, I want them.
“Then let’s give it a try.” I say and immediately a pair of lips find mine. It was a deep, passionate, and fiery kiss. It was rough and impatient. He pulls away and I see Tae’s eyes looking back at me. The stark contrast of that kiss and his behavior was … hot. I loved it.
Before I could properly process that another pair of lips were on mine. It was slow but equally as hungry but not as rough. As he kisses me I feel warm kisses tickle my neck. The sensation sent chills down my spine. I can feel them everywhere. Hands in my hair, my waist, my ass. It was a lot but so good
He pulls away, breathless.
“Shall we give it a text drive?” Taehyung whispers into my neck and I nod.
He kissed me again leading me somewhere. I can feel Jungkook kissing my neck and collar bone.
He pushes open a door to a bedroom. He sits me on the bed.
“Lets us take care of you, ok baby?” Taehyung says towering over me. I nod a bit to eagerly for my liking. This whole situation was like a fever dream. It was kind of embarrassing to admit but I’ve always wanted something like this.
“ I didn’t forget about you my baby boy.” Taehyung places a hands on the back of Jungkook’s neck pulling him for a hot steamy kiss.
My thighs squeeze together at the sight. Two beautiful strong men completely vulnerable and love with each other. Their strong hands wonder each other’s bodies. Familiar to them but foreign to me. The dynamic was new to them but Jungkook was putty in Tae’s hands, he was in total control of the once grumpy man.
I could feel myself getting wetter by the second, I was helplessly watching them kiss and undress each other.
Tae pulls away, “Now let’s not be greedy Kookie. Tonight is all about our new girlfriend.” The attention was back on me.
“Now won’t you be a good boy for her and show her what we’re all about.” He orders Jungkook.
His eyes lock on mine, his shirt already half undone. He looked so fucked already. His breathing was ragged and pupils dilated and he looked like we was ready to devour me.
He pushes me down on the bed. Lips on my neck while his hands travel up my shirt. His touch was hot and heavy. He slowly took off my shirt exposing my chest. He lets out a breath then his lips meets one of my nipples while the other hand occupies itself with the other.
Moans leave my lips as I try to bite them down.
He travels lower stripping his own shirt off. His tatted hand reaching beneath my skirt teasing my clit through my panties.
“You like that princess?” He asks. I nod.
He laughs “What you can’t use your words now?” He mocks me.
“I can use them fine asshole.” His hand wraps around my neck. Though it was out of my comfort zone the pressure felt so nice.
“Now that’s not nice now is it?” He flips me over before ripping away my skirt which I gasp at.
“ I think she needs a punishment kookie.” Taehyung deep voice echoes.
“Say you’re sorry.” He says in my ear,
“Yea right.” A harsh slap hit my ass which erupts a surprised pained sound from my throat.
“That will happen every time you decide to be mean, got that?” I nod feeling the burning sensation on my ass.
He slaps me again. “I said ‘got that?’”
“Yes .” I answer begrudgingly.
I feel the weight I’m on the bed shift, a palm pulls my hair up. And I’m face to face with Taehyung’s cock. He was huge.
“Open up baby.” he says with a mischievous knowing grin.
“I can’t fit that.” I say doubting only to be followed with another slap.
“Sure you can.” He says already pushing himself in my mouth.
“You just need to believe in yourself baby.” He pushes himself further in.
I feel him easily fill up my mouth and slowly filling up my throat. While distracted Jungkook pulls down my panties to reveal my soaked pussy.
“Wow so wet princess.” My pussy clenched around nothing at his words and the man filling up my mouth was not helping.
Hand still in my hair he guides me up and down his thick cock. He smiles at me as I look at him through my lashes.
I feel something drag across my pussy slapping it a couple times before slowly entering me. Oh god he was big too.
My moans are muffled sending vibrations onto his cock making him moan.
The stretch was mind boggling. It hire but it felt incredible. The feeling of being completely stuffed made me even more aroused.
The pair started moving. Tae started to fuck my face while Jungkook dug deeper into my pussy. I was already fucked out of my mind. Moaning on Taehyung’s dick, my arms and legs shaking.
“You like that princess?” I couldn’t answer only moan on the dick stuffed in my mouth. He slaps my ass again making me clench around his dick.
“Use your words.” He mocks me.
“Be nice kookie.” Taehyung grabs his hair.
“Or do you need to be punished too?”
“No.”
“Good boy.” He grabs his face and brings him into kiss him. They were both thrusting in me unforgivably so while tongue fucking each other.
They pull away from each other and I feel Jungkook’s chest on my back.
“Does he taste good?” He asks whispering into my ear as he palms my breast. I couldn’t answer only moan out.
“You like it when he fucks your face?” Tear well up in my eyes as the man shoves himself down my throat.
“I love it when he fucks my face.” All these words he’s whispering is getting me closer and closer.
After a few more thrusts the feeling became too much. My back arches as my nails dugs into Taehyung’s thighs. Muffle moan escape narrowly past his dick. Eyes roll back but their thrusts didn’t let up.
“Good girl.” He pulls out of my mouth, jaw aching. Jungkook does the same.
Jungkook pulls me onto him lying on the bed so I was completely on top of him, both of us facing Taehyung.
His gaze was intense and hungry.
“Look at the both of you. So pretty on top each other.” He kisses each of us.
Jungkook start to push himself in once again. Taehyung’s thumb finds my clit.
My hips jerk as I moan, I throw my head back resting on Jungkook’s shoulder. He places kisses on my neck as I feel his brushing grip on my waist.
Then I felt Taehyung’s lips. He stated licking and sucking on my clit. It was feverish and impatient.
“Cmon baby loosen up for me.” He says into my clit. The vibrations of his baritone voice made me loose it even more.
My hand finds Jungkook’s head gripping on his hair from the stimulation.
I look up and Taehyung’s eyes were already on me like a tiger stalking its prey.
I try to string up a few words, “y-you aren’t g-gonna fit” I say between pants and moans.
“Like I said baby, believe in yourself.” He smirks whispering in my ear. He may be smiling but this man has no mercy, he starts to push into me.
“Fuck! Tae, I can’t.” I babble through pain and pleasure. My nails digging into his shoulders.
“Breathe baby.” He kisses me it was patient and soft but didn’t lack the hunger from before. Inch by inch the two men stretch and destroy me.
Jungkook had his muscular arms wrapped around my waist, his fingers digging into my side. My hand grips his hair. We both were filling the intense fullness Taehyung was creating. Tears run down my face and pained moaned fill my throat.
“Oh god, oh god, oh god,” I mutter shakily. My body was trembling and my legs shaking on Taehyung’s shoulder. He presses sweet kisses on my neck and cheek and Jungkook whispers sweet nothings. But underneath them trying to work me through it they were just as fucked. Breathless with tears in their eyes from pure pleasure.
He finally bottoms out. I was barely breathing. The pain slowly morphs into pleasure. Jungkook’s grip tightens.
“F-fuck! Princess can we move please.” Jungkook whimpers in my ear. His begging made me moan and all I could do was breathlessly nod.
All at once they started moving. I could feel everything. The heat from their skin and breath, them rubbing together inside me. It was incredibly obscene but it was perfect.
A knot built up in my belly and a large hand presses on my abdomen escalating the pleasure. The men were moving at a restless pace. I look up through my tear filled lashes at Taehyung with him hand on my lower belly.
“Look baby.” He gestures to his hand and lifts it. I could clearly see the men’s cocks poking my skin. My legs clench at the sight.
“Oh fuck!”
The men continue their brutal pace. Till you felt them get sloppier in their thrusts pushing you to the edge.
“Want us to cum together?” Taehyung asks given he was the only one who could properly speak.
I nod eagerly and he kisses me panting into my mouth before doing the same to Jungkook,
“Let’s fill our pretty new girlfriend up.”
As if his voice was magic I felt the knot in me burst. Nails digging into Tae’s skin, toe curling, eyes rolling. I could feel them filling me up, their throbbing dicks in my pussy.
I let a strangled moan that no one should ever hear and I felt pain and pleasure everywhere. Their fingers digging into my body and Jungkook’s teeth in my skin. And I loved every part.
⤷"mini" one-shot!! in which....The perilla leaf debate in general is supposed to be nothing more than a stupid internet argument, until Jungkook nearly starts a war at dinner over Jimin helping you separate yours.
pairing: bestfriend!jungkook x fem!reader
warnings: friends to lovers, jk is down horrendous, jealousy over vegetables, mutual pining, lovesick idiot behavior, perilla leaves almost ruin a friendship, secondhand embarrassment, yearning, jimin stirs the pot for fun, kissing, tooth-rotting fluff, jk loses the perilla leaf war but gets the girl
word count: 1,5k
masterlist
The group chat has been blowing up since 4 p.m.
taehyung: pls tell me someone wants to go have dinner tonight. i'm dying of academic boredom
hobi: literally same. i haven't seen sunlight in 3 days
namjoon: i found this place downtown. it's called "korean fusion." wait, i'll send the address.
jimin: i hope everyone is coming... unless i might have to delete a certain someone's animal crossing save files
you: threats??? really???
jk: she's coming
you: umh??? i didn't even answer yet
jungkook: you're coming
The restaurant is the most Instagrammable place you've ever seen, and you would have gotten there faster if your roommate hadn't been in desperate need of moral support over a situationship. You see Jungkook look up at you the second you enter his peripheral vision.
"Finally," Taehyung says.
"Sorry, sorry." You slide into the booth, and there's only one spot left, wedged between Jimin and the wall, directly across from Jungkook. "Emergency friend duties."
"More important than us?" Hobi asks.
"You'll live," you say, but you're not paying attention because Jungkook is still staring at you. Your eyes meet. He doesn't look away. Your stomach flips, and you wonder if you should have done this another day because emotional rollercoasters don't sound like a great idea on an empty stomach.
"Hi," he says.
"Hi," you say back.
A few minutes later, the drinks and the banchan arrive. Jungkook is laughing at something Taehyung is saying, beer in hand, but he keeps glancing at you every time you reach for the banchan. You don't notice as you are trying your best to separate the stack of perilla leaves.
"Oh my God," you mutter, trying to separate them with your chopsticks. "Why are they like this?"
"Here," Jimin says, and his chopsticks slide in from your left, holding the stack steady while you pull one free.
"Thank you," you breathe, relieved, and you don't see the way Jungkook's knuckles go white around his glass.
You look up, and Jungkook is staring at Jimin, and it's nothing like the soft, longing looks he's been throwing your way all night. Jimin, oblivious, or perhaps not, hums as he sets the separated leaves on your plate.
"Jungkook-ah," Namjoon says from across the table. "Pass the garlic?"
Jungkook passes it without looking up.That's when you realize he's staring at the perilla leaves.
Oh.
Oh no.
You know about the perilla leaf debate. Everyone knows about the perilla leaf debate. It's a stupid thing where people argue whether it's okay to help someone else's partner separate their perilla leaves, whether it crosses a line, or not. Usually, usually, it's just internet debates and topics for variety shows.
Jungkook, however, looks like he's about to flip the table.
"So," Jimin says, "how's work been? Did you finish that powerpoint presentation?"
"Yeah, finally," you start to say, but Jungkook cuts in.
"She finished it yesterday," he says, pouring soju into your glass without asking.
Jimin's eyebrows lift. "Did she?"
"Mhm. She texted me at three in the morning," Jungkook says.
Namjoon looks up from his phone. Hobi pauses with his mouth full.
"Jungkook, that's not-" you say, blushing.
"Do you want some meat?" he asks instead, grabbing the kitchen scissors and carefully cutting the grilled pork belly into bite-sized pieces before placing them on your plate.
"Thanks..." you say slowly.
Jimin watches with his head tilted. He looks between you and Jungkook, then back to the perilla leaves.
"Ah," Jimin says softly.
"Ah what?" Taehyung asks.
"Nothing," Jimin says with a grin. He reaches for the perilla leaves again. "Do you want another one? These are really good." His chopsticks hover over the stack.
Jungkook's chopsticks hit his plate with a clatter.
"You don't have to. I'll do it," Jungkook says quickly.
"It's fine," Jimin says sweetly, separating another leaf. "I don't mind."
"I said," Jungkook replies, enunciating each word, "I'll do it."
He takes the leaf from Jimin's chopsticks and places it on your plate himself. Then he looks at Jimin with an expression that makes your stomach flip.
"Jungkook..." you say quietly.
"Eat," he tells you, looking at you with those soft eyes that could kill you.
Jimin leans back, studying Jungkook.
"What is it?" Hobi asks, looking between them.
"Just... perilla leaves," Jimin says. "You know the debate, right? Whether it's okay to help someone else's person with their leaves?"
The table goes absolutely silent and you want to disappear into the floor.
"Guys, seriously, it's not-"
"Some people think it's too intimate," Jimin continues, looking at Jungkook.
"And what do you think?" you ask.
Jimin shrugs playfully. "I think intention matters."
"What's your intention?" Jungkook asks.
Jimin holds his gaze for a long moment. Then he laughs, breaking the tension, and reaches over to pat Jungkook on the shoulder.
"Relax, maknae. I'm just teasing."
The rest of dinner passes quickly. Every time Jimin speaks to you, Jungkook finds a reason to touch you or get your attention. For the first time, it's not meant to be subtle. It's almost like a competition to see who hands you your coat when you leave or who walks closest to you on the way out.
Everyone agrees to walk to the Han River, grab some ice cream from a convenience store, and sit on the benches by the water. None of you are ready to go home yet.
You hang back, letting the others drift ahead. Jungkook stays beside you, his hands tucked into his pockets.
"You didn't have to do that," you say quietly.
"Do what?"
"Mark your territory."
He stops walking. You stop too, turning to face him.
"Is that what you think I was doing?" he asks.
"I don't know what you were doing, Jungkook. You acted like Jimin committed a crime by helping me with dinner."
He looks away. "You don't get it."
"Then explain it to me."
"The perilla leaf thing is stupid. I know it's stupid. But...I always want to be the one helping you. And I know I don't have the right to feel like that, but I do."
"Jungkook..." you say softly, trying to get him to look at you.
"Don't say whatever you're going to say. Let me just... let me have this one moment where I pretend it's okay that I feel this way, even though I'm your friend and I'm supposed to just be cool with Jimin flirting with you."
"He wasn't flirting."
"He was," Jungkook insists, finally looking at you. "Maybe he didn't mean it like that, but he was, and I hated it. I hated it so much. I wanted to be the one helping you, even with something as stupid as perilla leaves."
"You know," you say softly, "you could have just said something instead of starting a silent war at the dinner table."
"I don't know how to say things," he admits. "I only know how to... want... from a distance."
"That's the problem," you say as you reach out, your fingers finding his. His hand relaxes, and he threads his fingers through yours. "You think you're being subtle, but you're not. Everyone at that table knows exactly what's happening."
"Did you?"
"Yeah." You smile. "I know... and I think I've been waiting for you to help me with my perilla leaves for a pretty long time now."
"Don't joke."
"I'm not joking."
"Jimin was testing you, Kook."
"Testing me?"
"Yeah. He was messing with you. It was so obvious he was challenging you. He wanted to see if you'd finally do something about it." You smile. "He's not stupid. He saw it before either of us did."
Jungkook groans. "So I played right into his hands."
"And you were very dramatic about it," you say with a sigh.
"Shut up," he says, smiling.
"I liked it. I really like it when you stop being quiet about wanting."
He takes another small step closer. "So... can I help you with your perilla leaves next time?"
"Only if you're not doing it just to be polite."
He smiles nervously "I'm doing it because I want to be the person you reach for."
You look at him, at the tiny chocolate-chip mole beneath his lip that you've wanted to kiss for months.
Then you do.
You have to.
He's standing there with his heart in his hands, offering it to you like it's nothing.
His hands come up to cradle your face, his thumbs brushing softly along your jaw as he kisses you back.
When you finally pull away, his forehead rests against yours.
"Does this mean I won the war?" he asks, breathless.
"You were the only one fighting it, you idiot," you laugh, giving his chest a light shove. "Jimin wasn't actually interested. He has a crush on the barista at his coffee shop."
Jungkook blinks. "What?"
"Namjoon told me last week."
He stares at you, dropping his head to your shoulder. "I made a fool of myself for nothing."
"Not for nothing," you say, running your fingers gently through his soft hair. "You finally stopped being quiet."
He lifts his head.
"I can be loud," he says. "If you want. About this, about you."
"Show me."
"Gladly."
And he does. He kisses you again, deeper this time, and you smile against his lips.
Then Taehyung's voice carries over from farther up the path.
"Finally! Took you long enough!"
You laugh into his mouth and pull him even closer.
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY. GO FIND SOME FLUFF SOMEWHERE ELSE AFTER THIS–COOL? COOL.
Two days after your high school graduation, Jungkook proposed to you.
Granted, it was with a plastic ring sprayed with a flaking silver paint and tucked inside–an equally as cheaply made–plastic egg with a bright yellow bottom. He’d put three coins into one of those horrible, half broken, children’s toy machines and presented you his new treasure by getting down on one knee. At first, you’d laughed; Jungkook was always joking, so it had to be a prank. Who would propose to their high school sweetheart right there, in the middle of a busy street, when both knew their plans were about as solid as the sand at the beach they were heading to.
But, when he jerked his chin towards your hand and continued to stare at you as if waiting, you could only feel all of the blood rush to your face, ears and brain as he spoke those three words you would never forget.
“Marry me, YN.” It wasn’t a question because he already knew the answer–he always found the answers to life so quickly; it was one of his many talents. Sometimes his greatness infuriated you when you wanted to be right too, but that moment was not one of them. You couldn’t even get the words out properly before he was sliding the shitty ring onto your finger.
time for another reblog of this fic and to introduce a new btsblr generation to this masterpiece!! this is both the best and worst fic i have read in my entire life and i’ll let anyone know that although i will reblog this fic one every few years, i have only read this once and i will NOT even skim the summary again. read it and you’ll understand!
Summary: Jungkook is your husband who believes he lost his chance with your sister because of you. Now you're married to him, and revenge was the only reason he said yes to this marriage.
Warnings: jungkook is a walking red flag and oc is a dumb girl in love so read at your own risk? again, neither of their brains is fully developed here. toxic relationship, angst.
Word count: 11k
a/n: nine days in the making and here we are.... anon, i hope i did your request justice!! there will be a part two because yall i genuinely don't even know where to begin with this man’s redemption arc.... at this point, i fear the redemption arc alone is going to take over 10k words (lmk if you have any ideas, lend me ur creativity bbgs). all I can say is: please do not date men who do not kiss the ground you walk on!!!
taglist: @jiwikiwi @scriptved
You remembered the first time you saw him.
Your sister, Suji, was two years older than you and ever since you were ten, she brought her friends home nearly every weekend.
There were four of them: Jimin, Yejin, Taehyung, and Jungkook.
They were inseparable and exactly the kind of friendship you only ever read about in books or watched in movies. On weekends, your house was always filled with their voices and you never minded it, especially since two-years was not much of an age gap, hence you were included in almost everything they did.
That only changed after they graduated from high school and scattered across the country. Even then, the distance never truly separated them. They would stay in touch, called regularly, and planned a holiday together at least once a year.
As a child, being included in their group made you feel important. There was something exciting and cool about being ten and spending most of your time with older kids.
It did not take long for you to realise that Suji was the one holding them all together and her friends always orbited around her without noticing they were doing it. That never surprised you because Suji has always been the main character wherever she went, both at home and everywhere else.
You never resented her for it because she was the kindest sister you could have asked for. She never made you feel smaller than her, she invited you to parties you were too young to attend, defended you when Taehyung teased you about your missing front tooth, and let you borrow her clothes without ever complaining about it.
Her friends were kind to you too.
Jimin and Yejin were the first ones you met. You remembered them sitting beside you at the kitchen table, patiently helping you with your maths homework. Now they were married, with a daughter who was as cheerful as the two of them.
Then there was Taehyung, around whom fourteen-year-old Suji started acting differently. She became shy in his presence, more careful with her words, and she would glance at him now and then whenever she thought no one was looking. They were married now and, as far as you could tell, still having the time of their lives together.
And then there was Jungkook.
You, Suji, and the rest of her friends had been playing hide-and-seek throughout the house one Saturday afternoon, and Jungkook was the seeker. You hid behind the living-room curtain, holding your breath as you listened for his footsteps.
You were certain you would be caught first, because you barely had time to find a proper hiding place.
And you were right, Jungkook did find you first.
He pulled the curtain aside just enough to see you. But instead of dragging you out and gloating the way Taehyung or Jimin would have done, he merely smiled at you and ruffled your hair.
Then he let the curtain fall back into place and walked away to find the others.
You stayed behind the curtain for another full minute, your heart beating so loud that you considered asking your mom to call an ambulance.
At ten years old, what was that if not a knight in shining armour?
You have been in love with him ever since.
By fourteen, you assumed the feeling would have disappeared. It was supposed to be puppy love; something harmless and embarrassing that you would laugh about with Suji over wine in ten years time. But it did not just disappear like you thought it would.
In high school, Jungkook became one of the popular boys. His face made insecure boys resent him and hopeful girls imagine they had a chance with him. Yet he never seemed interested in any of it, he only cared about being around Suji and the rest of their friends, and he never seemed to mind having you around either.
Well, mostly because you were his best friend’s little sister.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
At fifteen, you finally told Suji about your little embarrassing crush.
She was not surprised when you confessed that you had a crush on one of her best friends. Jungkook was handsome too so it wasn’t really weird. You learned much later that she had known for years, but that night, she only laughed softly and said, “I’ll help you get together with him when you’re a little older, okay?”
Not long after you told her, Jungkook stopped coming to the house.
The rest of the group continued gathering in your living room every weekend as loud and inseparable as ever, but his usual seat was always empty. You still caught glimpses of him in the school hallways. He never said hello, though that wasn’t really strange since he rarely greeted you at school even before he stopped coming around your house.
Then you noticed that Jungkook started spending time with a different crowd. And it happened around the same time Suji and Taehyung finally started dating. These two quickly became the school’s “it” couple, with every photograph of them posted online always accompanied with the same ‘#CoupleGoals’.
But them getting together never surprised you.
What surprised you was that the moment Suji and Taehyung got together, Jungkook noticed you again, but not the way you wanted him to. The time your paths crossed again, he spat onto the ground in front of you and looked at you as if the sight of you disgusted him.
You didn’t understand it. You’ve adored him for five years by then, and you had no idea what you did to deserve that kind of hatred.
When you asked Jimin whether you somehow offended Jungkook, he only sighed and told you not to take it personally. And that Jungkook started spending time with wealthy, arrogant boys, and he has changed.
To you, it made sense for him to hang out with a different crowd, especially since he came from a different tax bracket than you did.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
You were twenty-two when you received the phone call from your mother.
By this time, Jungkook was somewhere not in your life; he was just a name that came up at your school reunion and nowhere else. You’ve heard things about him; that he helped his father ran their family’s company, then him eventually becoming the CEO.
Your mother has been a single mother almost your whole life, and she has never once, in twenty-two years, called you sounding like she was preparing for you to leave her life.
"Can you come home?" she asked, "tonight, if you can. I need to talk to you about something and I don't want to do it over the phone."
You asked if everything was okay, and she said she'll explain when you were there, which is somehow worse than any answer she could have given you, and you spent the whole drive over with your stomach tightened in knots.
Your mom was waiting at the kitchen table when you arrived, two cups of tea already going cold in front of her like she made them an hour ago and forgot they existed the moment she poured them.
“Mom?” you asked as you sat down in front of her, “this is reminding me of horror movies,” you chuckled.
"I need to tell you something," she said, "and I need you to not hate me."
You immediately became silent and didn’t even dare to say anything. So you let her say whatever she wanted to say in her own time, because she seemed as if she was going to burst into tears.
"I owe some family a great deal of money," she said, finally opening up after what felt like fifteen minutes, "forty million dollars. It's to the Jeon's family. Jeon Jungkook, do you remember him? From when you were kids, Suji's friend.."
You couldn’t help the gasp that followed, "How?" was all you could manage to respond with.
forty million dollars was more money than you have ever seen in your life. Your mother was an investment banker at a small firm, so your family has never been poor, but you were nowhere near forty-million-dollars rich. But then, compared to the Jeon family, you might as well have been poor.
“I’d been at the firm for three years by then,” your mother said, her eyes fixed on the table, “I was young enough to be desperate for a win. I wanted to prove myself, especially in rooms full of men who called me sweetheart and honey during meetings and constantly tease me.”
She paused, playing with her fingers in her lap, “One of my colleagues brought me a deal. It was a startup that was supposedly going to be bought out within eighteen months. It was the kind of tip that could make someone’s career if it worked.”
“And you believed him?” you asked.
“I believed in the startup,” she corrected, “enough to pass it on to a client I’d been trying to win over for months. Jungkook’s parents. I told them it was a sure thing,” your mother said, her voice slightly breaking on the word sure, “I wasn’t lying to them. I believed it too.”
She looked down at her hands, “That’s the part that still keeps me awake. I didn’t do it because I wanted to hurt anyone. I did it because I wanted them to trust me. I wanted it so badly.”
“And it failed?”
“Not at first. For a few months, everything looked promising, then the company’s lead investor pulled out after a fraud investigation. None of us saw it coming and the entire company collapsed within six weeks.”
She paused before continuing, “Jungkook’s parents lost almost everything they invested. And because I was the one who brought them the deal and told them their money would be safe, they came to me. forty million dollars was what they believed they would have earned if the deal had succeeded, added to everything they had lost.”
“They expected you to pay all of that?” you asked in disbelief.
“They said I could take as long as I needed and I could repay it at whatever pace I could manage, and they would never tell anyone what happened,” she said, before finally looking up at you.
"How much have you paid so far?" you ask, though some part of you already knows the answer will hurt you.
"Five hundred thousand. A little more, actually, slowly but steadily I was paying it off, but it has been years since the deal, ____," she said, her eyes filled with tears.
You have never seen her crying this much, not even at your father's funeral where she held back her tears for her children, "I didn't want you or Suji to know. It’s a debt I don’t want the two of you to carry.”
"And the rest of it?" you finally asked, "you wouldn't have called me here just to tell me about the debt or the amount. There's something else, right?"
Your mother's hands tighten in her lap, "They want to erase the whole forty million debt, if.. "
"If what?" you asked nervously.
"If you marry their son, Jungkook."
You laughed at your mother, because what she just said sounded like an opening line of a story or a cringe fan fiction you read on Wattpad years ago.
Then you looked at her face and understood she wasn’t trying to fool you at all.
“Mom,” you quietly said, your voice shaking out of anger, confusion, and sadness, you couldn’t really tell.
“I barely know him anymore. We haven’t spoken in years, and he’s not the boy from my childhood anymore. I don’t even know who he is now.”
“I know,” she said, and she sounded as if she dreaded saying the idea aloud, for even thinking of asking you to do this, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for even considering asking this of you,” her voice trembled, “I’ve thought it over in my head for weeks, and I feel so bad as a mother, it feels as if I’m selling you to fix my own mistake.”
She drew in a breath, “It’s fine, you don’t need to do this. I’ll find another way. I will not make you responsible for a debt that belongs to me.”
“Jungkook is a good-looking man, Mom. He’s rich too and he could have anyone he wanted,” you hesitated before asking further, “so why would he agree to this? Why me?”
“He’s refused everyone his parents have introduced him to,” she said quietly, “for years, apparently he has refused half a dozen women. From what I understand, he turned every one of them down.”
She paused before adding, “But this time, his parents told me it was his idea,” her eyes lifted to yours, “he chose you.”
You thought it was bullshit, why would Jungkook choose you out of all people? It was clear as days that his eyes were never on yours, and all of the sudden he has chosen you?
Jungkook was an old friend you spent years hoping never to see again. What could someone like him possibly want from you now?
You couldn’t help but wonder if being chosen meant being wanted by Jungkook, or if you were simply the easiest answer to him; something he agreed to because saying yes was easier than arguing with his parents over a marriage he did not care enough to refuse.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
You said yes.
Because when you did the math more than once that week, lying awake in the dark, trying to picture your mom at seventy still working even during the weekends to pay down a debt that is almost impossible to pay off.
You just couldn’t make yourself accept a future that looks like that when you have the power to end it with a single word.
You said yes because you have spent your whole life being the person who helps everyone around you. The little sister who never made anyone feel lacking in anything, the daughter who learned early not to add her own weight to a household already struggling with just one income. You were always the person who takes care of others when they are sick and never asks anyone to do the same for you.
It is the only thing you have ever known what to do. And some part of you just does not know how to look at someone who needs you and say no, even when the person who needs you most is yourself.
Then there is the other reason.
That small part of you that is still ten years old, still standing behind a curtain while Jungkook smiled at you, has never fully stopped hoping there might be a version of this where Jungkook looks at you without hatred.
You know how ridiculous that sounded.
You know it is not the kind of reason anyone sensible enough should agree to a marriage. But you were ten when you fell for him, and somehow, despite everything, a part of that girl never really went away. When your mother said Jungkook had chosen you, that little girl came rushing back.
You understand, even as you agreed to the marriage, that this is a stupid reason to ruin your life. Yet you said yes anyway, because you have never been as rational as you would like to believe when it comes to Jungkook.
Because some part of you would rather walk willingly into the fire than spend the rest of your life wondering what might have happened if you had turned away.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
Two weeks later you were standing in a hotel lobby, your hands were trembling despite the summer heat outside, because his mother suggested or insisted, really, that the two of you meet before anything was finalized.
You spent forty minutes deciding what to wear and hated yourself for even caring about it.
Jungkook was already there when you arrived, sitting at a corner table with his jacket off and his sleeves pushed up, and his phone in his hand. He didn't stand up when you sat down.
Up close, he still looked familiar, only older now. He had tattoos all over his right arm and there was very little left of the boy who used to smile at you like the two of you shared a secret.
"You're late," Jungkook said, not even looking up to look at you.
"By only four minutes," you answered.
"Four minutes I didn't have."
"Then you should've told your mother not to schedule this in the first place," you scoffed.
That finally made him look up from his phone. Something changed across his face, you could tell that Jungkook was surprised that you answered back at him instead of backing down like he seemed to expect you to do.
You remembered, vaguely, a boy who was gentle to you. There was very little of him left in the man frowning at you now, and you hated that some part of you still mourned the loss of someone you barely knew anymore.
"You don't remember me, do you?" Jungkook asked.
"Oh, I remember you," you said, “though you used to be nicer."
"You used to be shorter," Jungkook said, rolling his eyes at you.
You ordered coffee neither of you touched and spent the next forty minutes arguing about the wedding neither of you wanted.
And some small, foolish part of you enjoyed that meeting because arguing with Jungkook meant he was looking at you. It meant you mattered enough to annoy him.
It meant, for those forty minutes at least, you managed to take up space in his mind.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
You married him six weeks later, on a bright Saturday in August, in a dress that cost more than your mother's monthly salary, in a ballroom filled with flowers your mother-in-law chose without consulting you.
The man standing in front of you was not the boy who once found you behind a curtain during a hide-and-seek game.
Jungkook shook your hand instead of kissing you when the officiant told him he could. He even came up with a charming joke about how shaking hands was an inside joke between the two of you, which made the room laugh.
When you told Suji and Taehyung that you were marrying Jungkook, neither of them believed you. It happened too quickly, you have never told them you were in a relationship, there was no engagement or anything that might have explained how the two of you have gone from never speaking to planning a wedding.
You could not tell them about the debt. You didn’t want them to be angry with your mom, so you insisted it was a long time coming. You told them you have always loved Jungkook and that, somewhere along the way, he secretly started to feel the same way.
Suji and Taehyung did not believe that either, of course they didn’t, they knew Jungkook has always liked Suji. They just didn’t want you to know it, that was what they have been protecting you from since you were ten. So, at the wedding, neither of them cried. Even Jimin and Yejin didn’t bother to congratulate you either.
Suji only held your hands for a moment, while Taehyung stood beside her with an expression you couldn’t bring yourself to read.
“We’re here for you,” Suji said.
“Anytime,” Taehyung added.
You couldn’t tell whether that was a warning, but you knew then that they knew something you didn’t.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
Jungkook’s hand on your waist during the first dance felt cold, because he was touching you only because the event expected him to. He never pulled you closer or whispered something sweet in between of the dance. His eyes stayed fixed somewhere over your shoulder, while you moved together with the applause of people who believed they were watching two people in love.
Later, in a hotel suite far too large for two people who had nothing to say to each other, you and Jungkook sat at opposite ends of the couch, still dressed in your wedding clothes.
Jungkook's tie had been pulled loose and the top buttons of his shirt were undone. Your veil was folded beside you and the hand bouquet of flowers were placed right between the two of you.
“Just so we’re clear, we’re only married on paper,” Jungkook eventually said.
Jungkook didn’t think he was being cruel to you. If anything, he believed he was doing you a kindness by being honest from the beginning.
“I won’t cheat on you. I can’t afford to have my company being caught up in a scandal,” he continued, “but I’m not going to treat you like a wife. As far as I’m concerned, you’re just my roommate.”
“Okay,” you said.
It was the only word you could utter at that moment.
You did not know how to explain how his words made you feel. You only knew that you already decided Jungkook would never see you cry over something he clearly would never think was worth grieving.
You changed out of your wedding dress in the bathroom because it felt strange to do it in front of a husband who barely looked at you since the ceremony.
That night, you slept on opposite sides of the same bed, with a pillow placed between the two of you like a line neither of you was meant to cross.
By the time you woke up the next morning, Jungkook was already gone.
At the very least, Jungkook had the decency to leave a note on the counter with his flight time. Much later in the marriage, you would realize it was the first of countless mornings that started the same way:
waking up to find out that Jungkook already left.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
first year of marriage
Jungkook moved into the guest room during the very first day you started living together. That first night, you lay awake in the enormous bed you were apparently meant to have all to yourself, listening to the faint sounds of Jungkook moving around the apartment.
Then during the first year of your marriage, you found yourself keeping track of everything Jungkook never did.
You stupidly believed that if you counted the nights he came home, the meals you shared, and the times he looked at you like he cared about you, then you might be able to prove that things were getting better. And when they did not, the numbers became proof that you had not imagined how lonely the marriage made you feel.
You hated that you cared enough to count it all and you hated yourself even more for still waiting for Jungkook to change.
Pathetic did not feel like a strong enough word for measuring your marriage by how little your husband gave you, only to find yourself disappointed each time the answer was almost nothing.
You counted the nights he came home before midnight: 11 out of 365 days.
You counted the meals you ate at the same table: 4, and two of those were during the week his grandmother visited. To Jungkook, keeping up appearances to his family mattered more than whatever existed between the two of you.
You counted the number of times he asked how your day was: 0.
Well, what did you really expect?
This was an arranged marriage, and Jungkook chose you because he knew you would be easy to please without ever having to worry that you might leave the marriage. At some point, you realized maybe Jungkook had always known how you felt about him. Perhaps that was why he had chosen you as his wife in the first place.
Yet what some stupid part of you wanted was to know undoubtedly that he cared for you, even just a little.
Whenever you were out with friends and thought of him, you would bring something home and leave it on the counter with a note telling him it was his to eat or drink.
By morning, the food was always still sitting there on the counter, clearly untouched.
Jungkook never ate any of the food you brought home for him, not once that entire year. So eventually, you stopped being surprised and then, sometime near the end of the first year, you stopped bringing anything home at all.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
Family holidays were the worst because Jungkook never bothered to show up. So you had to act and lie to everyone around you that the marriage was fine and Jungkook is just one busy businessman.
“He’s on a business trip,” you told your mother at Chuseok, “the company’s expanding into three new markets this quarter. He barely has time to sleep.”
“He’s swamped with work,” you told Suji at your father’s memorial dinner. That was the one day you truly wanted him there. Just once, you wanted your fake husband to stand beside you at your father’s grave, so you didn't have to lie when you were already drowning in grief and sadness. “Jungkook sends his condolences,” you added.
He did not.
You made it up, the way you always did. He did not come because he did not want to, because you were not worth giving up even a single hour of his life for. You could not say any of that to the people who loved you, not yet and maybe not ever.
Besides, you had no one to blame but yourself.
No one had forced you to say yes. Your mother would have been fine if she had to keep paying the debt, even if it took the rest of her life, and you could have helped her without marrying Jungkook. There were always other choices you could have picked, harder ones perhaps, but they always existed.
Yet you chose this route.
You walked into the marriage willingly because some foolish part of you wanted an answer to the question you’ve always had since you were ten: what would happen if Jungkook chose you to be his partner?
Well, now, the adult version of you know.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
What you didn't know that first year was that Jungkook noticed all the empty containers more than he let on, he noticed all the food you brought home for him to consume.
Jungkook would come home late most nights, and sometimes later than he actually needed to, because coming home early meant having to sit in the same room as you, and Jungkook never knew what to say to you.
He would see the food you left for him on the counter with a small note on top of it. And every time he saw it, something in his chest felt weird. Jungkook told himself what he felt had to be guilt, there was no other reason for him to care about you.
A few times, Jungkook found himself standing in the kitchen in the middle of the night, holding the food you brought home and he would just stare at it for a while before putting it back exactly where you left it. Because he didn’t want you to know he had even looked or noticed the effort you put in for him.
To Jungkook, the whole point of this marriage was revenge.
You ruined his life, so he was ruining yours.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
second year of marrtiage
By the second year of your arranged marriage, you were used to the coldness between you and Jungkook. You stopped hoping for him to change his ways, you stopped waiting for him at dinner and setting out a second plate.
You started going to Suji's for girls’ nights and coming home late on purpose, just to see if Jungkook would notice and he never did. Thankfully, it didn't hurt you as much as it would have in the first year. Most nights, he was either still out or locked inside his study. Sometimes the light under the door was the only sign that he was even home.
The apartment stayed exactly the same whether you were there or not.
At New Year, your aunt cornered you before dinner, “Where’s your husband? We’ve only met him twice in two years, and one of those times was at your wedding.”
“He’s closing a deal in Singapore,” you answered easily as lying about Jungkook was almost natural by now, “it’s a big one, so he had to be there.”
What she did not know was that you cried in your car before coming upstairs. You gave yourself exactly ten minutes to cry, sitting in the dark parking lot with the engine off and your forehead pressed against the steering wheel. Once ten minutes were over, you went upstairs to greet your family and smiled as if nothing was wrong.
It was also during the second year that you flew to Jeju for the wedding of one of Jungkook’s business partners.
You assumed you would sit together since it was still a public appearance. It felt stupid now, standing at the gate of priority passengers with your boarding pass in hand, but you didn’t think to check your tickets until Jungkook told you.
“I’m flying first class,” he said, “you’re in economy.”
“Oh,” you forced a small laugh, trying to sound as if it didn’t bother you, “I thought you would’ve booked us seats next to each other.”
“Economy seat should be fine for you. It’s only three hours.”
You spent the flight in a middle seat between two strangers, leaning past the person beside you whenever you wanted to look out the window.
Years ago, you believed being noticed by Jungkook would feel like winning something.
Now you were his wife, and he couldn’t even be bothered to sit beside you.
When the plane landed, he was not waiting for you, just as you expected. You had to book a taxi to the hotel alone and texted him to say you have arrived. And his only reply was the number of the room you had to share together since most of his colleagues and friends are staying in the same hotel.
When you let yourself into the room, he was on a call, feet up on the balcony railing as he sat on the balcony couch. It was thankfully an ensuite room with 2 separate beds, so you didn’t have to share a bed with him. Your only interaction with Jungkook then was when he lifted his finger in front of his mouth to tell you to be silent as he was talking on the phone.
At the wedding reception, you sat at a table full of his friends, who happened to be the group he used to hang out with at school, and you smiled throughout a dinner where no one asked you a single question about yourself, because to them you were simply "Jungkook's wife.”
You weren’t paying much attention to the conversation until one of the women at the table turned to you, “Is that even a real Van Cleef?” she asked, nodding at your bracelet, “it doesn’t look like it.”
“It isn’t,” you said, “it was handmade by a small business.”
“Huh,” she looked at it again, her mouth twisting slightly in disgust.
Another woman leaned closer, “Don’t you think you should make more of an effort with Jungkook’s friends? You never come to any of our gatherings. We barely know anything about you besides the fact that you’re Suji’s younger sister.”
Jungkook has never invited you to any of those gatherings, but you couldn’t tell them that, it would only give them something else to laugh about, “I’ve been busy,” you said.
“Jungkook is much busier than you,” one of the men cut in.
The first woman looked at you again, “You should be more careful about how you dress too, wearing cheap jewellery makes your husband look bad.”
It was not as if Jungkook has ever given you money to buy anything, not that you would have taken it even if he had.
“I see,” you muttered.
You stared at her bracelet before standing up from your seat, “Well, at least mine was made responsibly by someone who was paid fairly,” you said, “can you say the same about yours? Or do you just not care about the children who had to mine the diamond and stones as long as your jewellery came in an expensive box?”
Then you picked up your bag and walked away before any of them could answer.
Later, near the bar, you overheard your husband's name.
"Jungkook, honestly, I always thought you would end up with the sister. Suji, right? The one who's married to Taehyung now? She would've made more sense since you had always fancied Suji too. I mean, no offense, your wife seemed sweet, I guess, but.."
"She doesn't really fit in with us, does she?" someone else said, finishing the sentence the other couldn’t.
You turned away before you could hear Jungkook’s response, already heading back towards a table where you felt just as out of place, then his voice stopped you mid-step.
“Yeah,” Jungkook answered, sounding almost bored, “I guess Suji would’ve made more sense for me.”
That was the day you found out Jungkook fancied your sister.
You waited until you were in the hotel bathroom to cry. You locked the door, sat on the closed toilet lid, and pressed both hands over your mouth because Jungkook was somewhere on the other side of the wall and you could not let him hear you.
It should not have hurt as much as it did, you knew he did not love you. Jungkook made that clear from the first night of your marriage.
But knowing he did not want you was different from finding out he liked your own sister.
Suddenly, everything made sense to you.
The way Taehyung and Suji looked at each other when you announced the marriage to them and the way they never congratulated you. They knew, everyone knew except you.
And the worst part was remembering that you told them you have always loved Jungkook, and that he secretly liked you too.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
A few weeks later, back home, you went to dinner at one of Jungkook’s business partner’s houses. You wore the nicest outfit you owned, but you knew the second you walked in that it still was not enough for them.
One of the wives looked you up and down before smiling, “Cute,” she said.
And you knew it was not a compliment.
“No ring upgrade yet?” another woman asked during dessert, nodding at the plain band on your finger, “Jungkook usually doesn’t do anything halfway. I guess he’s saving the good jewellery for later.”
“She likes simple things,” Jungkook said without looking at you and then he continued, “Suji always said less is more too.”
You quickly excused yourself and went to the bathroom before your face gave you away. When you came back, they were talking about Suji, about how smart and impressive she was.
“You know,” one of his friends said to you as he refilled his glass, “we always thought Jungkook would end up with your sister. You seem sweet, but Suji and Jungkook would’ve made much more sense together.”
“None taken,” you said. This was a conversation you have heard before, so you didn’t really care much of it, at least that was what you thought.
You looked at Jungkook across the table and waited for him to say something, but he didn’t. Jungkook could have told them to stop. He could have done anything that made you feel like you were not just the wrong sister sitting in Suji’s place. But instead, he looked away and didn’t even bother to correct them.
You didn’t speak during the entire drive home, Jungkook didn’t ask what was wrong or maybe he didn’t even notice how your silence was different, or maybe every silence with you sounded the same to him.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
The next morning, you tried to talk to him about it, because some stubborn, hopeful part of you still believed that if you just explained it clearly enough, he would understand how you felt.
"You compared me to my sister in front of your friends," you said, over coffee he was drinking standing up, already half way out the door.
"It wasn't a big deal," he said, checking his watch, “it was a joke."
"It didn't feel like a joke."
"I don't have time for this right now," he said, "can we talk about it tonight?"
You knew, even as you nodded, that tonight would turn into tomorrow, and tomorrow would become some vague promise of “later”. By then, you already knew what later meant with Jungkook, it meant never.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
What you did not know was that Jungkook kept thinking about what he said in Jeju.
“Suji would’ve made more sense.”
The words came back to him at random times; in the shower, in the elevator, during meetings when he was supposed to be listening, and he kept telling himself it was true. Suji was always the one he wanted and everyone knew that.
Still, he could not understand why saying it had made him feel so bad.
Jungkook should not have felt guilty. You were the reason he lost Suji in the first place. You were the reason she had chosen Taehyung and left him behind.
So if anyone deserved to feel guilty, it was you.
Later that year, on a night you were out, he opened the cabinet and took out two plates without thinking. He stared at them for a few seconds before putting one back.
You stopped setting a place for him months ago, but he watched you do it so many times during the first year that the habit had somehow stayed with him. He stood there longer than he needed to, wondering why he reached for two plates when he knew you were not coming home.
For years, Suji had been the person Jungkook believed he wanted. His friends still mentioned her like she was some great love he lost, and he let himself believe that was true because it gave him a reason to stay angry.
But whenever Jungkook tried to remember her, his mind kept going somewhere else. He remembered sitting at your family’s kitchen table, helping you finish a puzzle because no one else wanted to. Jungkook remembered finding you behind the curtain during hide-and-seek, and he remembered how easily you used to laugh around him.
Jungkook has not heard your laugh in a long time and that bothered him more than he wanted to admit.
One night, while you were out celebrating a friend’s birthday, he sat alone in the living room with a drink in his hand. He remembered you mentioning the party, though he couldn’t remember whether you told him directly or if he saw the birthday card on the counter.
Jungkook looked around the apartment and thought that you were probably happier when he was not there.
And Jungkook did not like that thought. He did not like knowing that you could leave the apartment and become a completely different person around everyone else; someone happier.
He poured his drink into the sink and went to bed early.
Jungkook told himself what he was feeling towards you was guilt that would pass if he ignored it long enough.
It did not.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
third year of marriage
By the third year of marriage, you stopped hoping at all.
Whatever hope you carried into the marriage was nowhere to be found. You could not remember the exact moment it happened, you only knew that one day, you stopped expecting anything from Jungkook.
The two of you have been living separate lives under the same roof.
You paid for half of everything, the groceries, bills, and all the other small expenses neither of you ever discussed.
You have also gotten even better at lying during family gatherings; “he’s travelling,” “he’s busy,” or “the company is going through an important season.” You said the same excuses so often that the lies came out without any effort nowadays, even Suji stopped asking you questions about Jungkook.
“You know you don’t have to keep covering for him,” Suji said quietly at your mother’s birthday after you finished explaining Jungkook’s empty chair for the hundredth time, “we’re not going to think less of you if you tell us the truth.”
“I know,” you said.
You just didn’t have the energy to say it out loud. Once you told them, they would worry, they would ask what you planned to do, they would want you to leave him, and then you would have to explain why you even stayed for so long.
Some nights, you sat alone in the apartment and thought about how long it has been. Three whole years; you have spent three years living with someone who barely knew you.
You counted everything during the first year, but eventually, you stopped doing so. The amount of things Jungkook has done for you has become too embarrassing. There was no point keeping track of shared meals when there were barely any to count.
You feel like a different person now, sometimes, you almost feel sorry for yourself.
You waited so long for your knight to choose you, never knowing that when he finally did, it would be the very thing that broke you apart.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
Sometime during the third year of the marriage, Jungkook finally began to understand something he spent most of his life getting wrong.
It has never really been Suji.
For years, he has been so sure she was the one he wanted. Suji was beautiful, confident, and always at the centre of everything. Everyone liked her, so wanting her had always made sense to Jungkook, especially when everyone around him seemed to expect it.
But when Jungkook thought back to the years he spent at your family's house as a kid, the memories that stayed with him were never really about Suji.
It was you sitting beside him at the kitchen table, asking for help with a puzzle even though you were too shy to look directly at him. It was you hiding behind the curtain during hide-and-seek and him trying not to laugh when he found you. It was the way you used to save him a seat at lunch, the way you followed him around when you were younger, the way your face lit up whenever he paid attention to you, as if he'd done something far kinder than he actually did.
Somehow, Jungkook took all of those memories and put Suji's name all over them instead. Maybe it was because Suji was his age, and she fit so easily into the rest of his life. You have only ever been Suji's little sister, or at least that was what he always told himself. And the truth came to him slowly, then all at once.
It would have been easier if Jungkook could have kept blaming you.
Jungkook was sixteen when he finally found the courage to tell Suji how he felt, he was certain she felt the same way, only for her to turn him down. Suji told him she liked Taehyung, not him. Then she told him that even if she felt differently, she could never be with him. She told him that she couldn't bear the thought of you finding out that the boy you adored since you were ten had fallen for your own sister instead.
That was the day Jungkook decided you were the reason he lost Suji. He never could decide who he was angrier at; you for telling her first or Suji for choosing you over him.
And Jungkook found it easier to be angry at you.
He told himself for years that marrying you was a way of taking back what he lost, except somewhere in the second year of your marriage, the plan stopped feeling like justice and started feeling like something he will regret his whole life.
Because somewhere in that same year, without meaning to, Jungkook started noticing you.
He noticed that he memorised the sound of your keys in the door. He noticed he wasn't surprised your mug was blue, because he remembered you telling him back when you were still a kid that blue was your favourite colour.
Jungkook started noticing the shows you watched in the living room that he could hear from his room, the nights you came home late and laughed quietly on the phone before disappearing into your bedroom, and the way the apartment felt different when you were gone.
He noticed you took your coffee black in the mornings but liked your tea with milk at night. Jungkook noticed the light under your door usually went out around midnight, and on the nights it didn't, he found himself lying awake wondering what was keeping you up.
Jungkook noticed how you would go still for a second before answering your mother's calls, then soften your voice the moment you picked up. He noticed you still bit the inside of your cheek when you were concentrating, exactly the way you did at ten years old.
He spent years insisting he had no interest in getting to know you, and somewhere along the way, he memorised you completely.
He even started coming home earlier on the nights he knew you would be there; early enough that he could hear you moving around in the kitchen, or catch a glimpse of you before you went to bed.
Jungkook remembered that night in Jeju more clearly than he wanted to. He watched you leave the table after his friends made fun of your bracelet, and for a second, he almost went after you. Yet he did nothing instead and later at the bar, he told someone that Suji would have made more sense for him. It was just easy to say because he has been telling himself the same thing for years.
It was easier to believe he lost Suji than to admit he was ruining whatever chance he had with you.
The night he finally realised it, he tried to think about Suji, tried to search for whatever he spent years insisting was still there and there was nothing. Whatever he felt for Suji disappeared a long time ago. Jungkook only kept holding onto it because it felt familiar, because blaming you was easier than admitting he was the one in the wrong.
He knew more about you than he ever bothered to learn about Suji, and that was when he finally understood that all along, the person he has been thinking about was you.
Somewhere in the middle of an arranged marriage he agreed to as a revenge, Jungkook had fallen for the person he was punishing, and he only realised it after you had already stopped caring whether he came home.
The only question left was whether Jungkook had realised he witnessed your devotion too late.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
You didn’t come home that night, instead you called your sister for an emergency meeting at your mom’s place, "Come by mom’s house tonight," you pleaded, "please."
Suji and Taehyung were already there when you arrived.
You sat down at the kitchen table where you grew up doing homework, "I need to tell you guys something," you said.
So you told them about how he treated you, you told them the reason behind the empty chair at every holiday, and every single thing that happened during your marriage.
The moment you stopped talking, your mother went to her knees in the middle of the kitchen. You have never, in twenty-six years, seen your mother on her knees for anything, not even at your father's funeral where she stood so straight and so still you worried she had forgotten how to bend her knees
"I did this to you," your mother cried out, and she was frantic in a way you have never once witnessed, her hands were shaking as she reached for yours, "I owe them the money, not you. I sold you to fix my own mistake and I have watched you smile through three years of a marriage that's been eating you alive and I told myself it was fine because you never once complained, because you're so good at never complaining, and I am so sorry, I am so sorry, please forgive me."
You dropped to your knees and held her, and you cried the way you haven’t let yourself cry in years. You cried until your throat was hurting, until Suji came around the table and wrapped her arms around both of you, until Taehyung stood a few feet away with his jaw tight and his hands curled into fists.
"It's okay," you said, when you could speak again,"I'll always help you, Mom. I mean that, I’ll help you pay that debt. But this time, I want a divorce."
Suji was already standing next to you, and the look on her face was one you'd never seen there before, "I am going to kill him," she said, “I’m sorry, ____. I never.. I should have known. I should have asked you harder. I should have protected you."
"Don't," you said, “please. I don't want any of you doing anything. I don't want him in my life anymore, and I don't want to spend one more minute of my energy on him. I just want it to be over. I want to be done."
They didn't like it.
You could see in all of their faces that it was hurting them not to do anything in your stead. But they loved you enough to hear you out.
For the first time in three years you slept in your childhood bedroom, and that night, you slept better than you have in a long, long time.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
At first, Jungkook didn’t think much of it when you weren’t home. You went out sometimes. Three years of marriage taught him your routine; Tuesdays with your girlfriends; the occasional weekend at your mother’s.
Jungkook came home the first night to an empty apartment, ordered food, and ate it standing at the kitchen counter. Your disappearance didn’t seem unusual enough for him to question it.
By the second day, the apartment felt different and he couldn’t immediately work out why. The coffee maker hadn’t been used, there was no bitter smell in the kitchen when he walked in that morning and the mug you always used for tea was still sitting where he left it two days ago.
Jungkook looked at it for longer than he should have, then he checked the entryway for your shoes and they weren’t there. An hour later, Jungkook checked again, and still you weren’t back home.
By the third day, he texted you.
Jungkook: You okay?
No message came back. He stared at the screen until it dimmed in his hand again, and when Jungkook unlocked it, there was still nothing.
By the fourth day, the uneasiness became too loud for him to ignore. It followed him into the shower, the car, and the office. Jungkook sat through meetings without taking in a word. Jungkook asked his assistant to repeat what they just said three times, and afterwards Jungkook still couldn’t remember what they were even discussing.
Jungkook called you once in the afternoon, then again on the drive home, but both calls went to voicemail.
Jungkook wasn’t used to this.
Jungkook is used to handling problems, hell, he has built companies and sat across from men twice his age and made them agree to terms they had sworn they would never accept. Jungkook knew how to remain calm when everyone else in the room was losing their mind.
But that night, at two in the morning, Jungkook lay awake thinking about one unanswered text, thinking about where you were, if you were eating well, if you were sleeping soundly, if you will ever come back home to him.
When did he become like this?
By the fifth day, Jungkook drove past your mother’s street twice.
The first time, he told himself he had taken the wrong turn. The second time, he slowed down near your house and looked for a light in the windows. Jungkook wanted proof that you were there, that you were somewhere and you didn’t simply disappear beyond his reach.
Jungkook hated how badly he needed you. He opened your contact on his phone again and again but never pressed call, his thumb only hovered over your name until the screen went dark again.
The past three years of marriage have been made up of small things he never should have done. The meals you prepared that he barely touched, the questions he answered without looking at you, the evenings when you sat beside him and eventually stopped trying to start a conversation.
You tried to make a life with him, yet Jungkook treated every attempt as an inconvenience.
For years, he told himself that he was the victim, that Suji was the person he should have been married to. But when Jungkook forced himself to remember exactly why he liked Suji, he felt nothing.
What Jungkook remembered was always you and everything the two of you had done together. He remembered a girl half his size sitting across from him, looking up at him like he was her world. He remembered playing hide-and-seek with you and he remembered pretending not to see you.
Jungkook always said Suji was the person he was the happiest with, but all the memories that felt warm to him, belonged to you.
Admitting the truth would have meant admitting that Jungkook spent years hurting the wrong person. And tonight, Jungkook sat alone in the living room and finally clearly admitted the one he always wanted was you.
Jungkook didn’t want a divorce and he did not want you to leave him.
When he imagined the apartment being empty of your things, Jungkook’s chest started hurting. When he imagined another man hearing you laugh, learning what food you liked, being invited to your mother’s house, he felt something pressing against his chest that it was hard for him to breathe.
Jungkook wanted you to remain his wife and the thought made him feel ashamed of all the things he had done to you the past three years.
“My wife,” Jungkook said to his empty apartment.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
Jungkook tried to call Suji, but she didn’t answer. So, the next morning, he called Taehyung and to his surprise, Taehyung answered on the second ring.
“Stay away from my family,” was all Taehyung said when he picked up.
“I knew you had feelings for my wife,” Taehyung continued, “I have known for years, I knew since we were children, Jungkook. I didn’t say anything because I thought you would get over it. I thought it was some pathetic thing from when we were younger that would eventually die out.”
“Taehyung,” Jungkook tried to cut him off, but Taehyung wouldn’t let him.
“No. You don’t get to say shit. It’s been years,” Taehyung said, “and while you were busy feeling sorry for yourself, you destroyed her sister. Three years, Jungkook. She carried your marriage alone for three years and still smiled through every family dinner because she didn’t want anyone worrying about her. We recently found out it was an arranged marriage, fine, you didn’t have to love her, but you could have treated her decently.”
“You knew she didn’t deserve it,” Taehyung continued, “that’s the part I can’t understand. You knew exactly who she was, and you still treated her like she was responsible for everything you hated about your life.”
“I know.”
“No, you don’t,” Taehyung let out a short and bitter laugh, “But I hope you do now. I hope you finally understand what you’ve done, and I hope you feel every second of it.”
Then the call ended.
Jungkook spent years blaming you for a decision neither of you had made. Every humiliation, disappointment, and every bit of grief he carried since he was seventeen, he somehow found a way to make it yours.
It was easier than looking at you, who stayed beside him and asked for so little, and realising he had still given you even less than that.
Now you were gone and there was no one left for him to blame but himself.
Jungkook was not the man he always imagined himself to be. He was pathetic, petty, cowardly, and far smaller than the woman he spent three years treating like nobody.
Jungkook has been nothing but a pathetic, petty and frightened boy wearing a man’s face.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
The next day, Jungkook went to your mother's house.
She opened the door and just looked at Jungkook with disappointment across her face. It was the same look she gave him when he didn’t kiss you at the altar.
"I'm not here to see her," Jungkook quickly said, before your mom could close the door, "I know she doesn't want to see me yet. I'm here because I need to say something to you, and I need you to hear me out."
She didn’t say anything, yet she opened the door wide enough to let him in. Unlike the other guests who have visited her home, your mother did not offer Jungkook tea. There was no need to treat him like an acquaintance, soon Jungkook will be her ex son-in-law and someone whom she’ll never ever meet in her life again.
She sat him at the same kitchen table where you cried just a few nights before.
"I owe your family a lot of money," she said, folding her hands in front of her, "I understand that. I understand this was an arranged marriage none of you asked for or wanted, and that you were as much a pawn in it as my daughter was.”
She drew in a small breath before continuing, “What I do not understand, Jungkook, is how you could treat another human being, my daughter, the kindest person I have ever raised and the one who never once in her life made anyone feel small… How could you have treated her the way you have done the past three years? I am in as much pain watching what this did to her as she is living it, maybe even more, because I was the one who put her in this situation with you in the first place. So tell me, why should I forgive you? Why should I let you anywhere near her again? What exactly do you intend to do?"
Jungkook has never been shaken by anything in his life, not until tonight, sitting in front of your mother.
"I don't have a clear answer," he said, "I wish I did. I spent years being angry at _____ for something that was never even her fault, something I won't even go into right now, because it's mine to explain to her first. And then I spent three more years married to her and still treating her like she was the one who wronged me. I'm not asking you to forgive me."
Jungkook looked at her, and he looked so broken your mother couldn’t help pitying him, "I'm asking for the chance to keep showing up until it means something to her. I'll beg for her forgiveness, I'll keep coming back even when she tells me not to, even when she has every right to slam the door in my face. But we'll talk, we'll argue, we'll probably fight, more than once, because I don't think she's going to make this easy for me, and she shouldn't and I wouldn’t want her to. I just know I can't bring myself to just let this end without actually trying for the first time in this whole marriage. I want to be someone worth her time. Without knowing it, I realised that the small things she has done throughout our marriage was never small at all. She loved me despite the ugly things I have done. I was just too busy being furious at my past to notice I was standing next to the person I actually wanted."
Your mother stared at him for a long moment, long enough that Jungkook thought she might ask him to leave without another word.
Her marriage to your father hadn’t always been easy. There were years of arguments over parenting, finance, and many more. There were years where she wondered if she married too young.
But when he died, something in her broke apart and it never quite put itself back together.
She remembered how you used to climb into their bed on Sunday mornings, how your father would let you win at cards, how you cried at his funeral so quietly like you were trying not to take up too much space even in your own grief.
you see, your mother knew about your crush on Jungkook. She watched you for sixteen years, she saw the way your face changed whenever Jungkook's name came up at the dinner table, and pretended not to notice the way you used to volunteer to answer the door whenever Suji’s group of friends came around, just in case it was Jungkook. She knew, long before you ever confessed to it, that you had loved him since you were a child.
And when she told you about the arranged marriage, some small, guilty part of her had let herself believe that maybe this could help. Maybe if she was going to ruin your life with her mistake, it could at least be with the one person you had always wanted to have a relationship with.
She was wrong.
She watched that hope change into something else these past three years, watching you get smaller in ways you thought she hadn't noticed, watching you repeating lies about a man who could not even be bothered to accompany you for your own father’s death anniversaries.
She was, is, a bad mother for that.
But she also knew you. She knew that if she asked you right now, whether some part of you still wanted to know if he was willing to try, you wouldn’t say no.
"Sit up straight," she finally said, and Jungkook blinked at her, caught off guard.
"I'm sorry?"
"You heard me," your mother’s voice was firm and steady, "If you're going to sit in my kitchen and tell me you intend to fight for my daughter, you're not going to do it slouched over like a boy waiting to be punished. Fighting for her means showing up like you mean it, every time, starting now."
Jungkook immediately straightened his posture.
"I'm not telling you this because I forgive you," she continued, "I will not forgive you for a long time, and that will be my right to decide, just as it will be hers."
She took a deep breath, before continuing, "But I have spent three years watching my daughter lie to the people who love her because she didn't want anyone to know how badly you have hurt her. If you're serious, then you do not need to convince me. You show her, you keep showing it to her, and you need to accept that she may never let you back in, and you don't get to be angry about it, not after all the years you've taken from her already."
"She was ten years old the first time she talked to me about you," she said quietly, "I used to think it was sweet. I didn't know I was watching the beginning of something that would be a long time pain for her. So if she gives you a second chance, you do not waste whatever time she gives you, Jungkook. She has given enough of it away for free, do you understand me?"
"I understand," he said.
♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡
You came home from a work trip three days later and found Jungkook sitting at your family home’s dining table, his laptop open and a stack of papers beside him like it was any other weekday.
He was sitting there as if it wasn’t your first time seeing him since you walked out of the home you shared with him.
"What the fuck are you doing here?” you sneered.
Your keys were clenched in your hand, and your entire body went rigid at the sight of him sitting in a chair at your family home.
"I'm here to date you," he said, slowly looking up at you.
You stared at him in disbelief, "You are here to what?"
“Date you,” Jungkook said as he closed his laptop, “I want to date you properly this time.”
For a second, all you could do was look at him.
"I know what I did,” Jungkook continued, “I know what three years of this marriage to me did to you. I'm not asking you to forget it. I just.. I want the chance to earn what I should’ve earned before we ever got married.”
You let out a dry and humourless laugh, before asking, “What the fuck?!”
You dropped your keys onto the counter, and they hit harder than you intended it to be, “You think you can just show up here and ask to start over?”
“No matter what you do, my heart is not going to change, Jungkook. I'm not a child anymore. I know better than to give you a second chance, hell, I gave you a hundred chances over the last three years and you didn't take a single one.”
“You are beneath me now,” you said quietly, “do you understand that?”
“Then give me one last chance,” Jungkook said, almost pleading.
“Let me court you,” he continued, “let me date you the way I should have the past three years.”
You didn’t answer.
You just walked past him and went to get changed.
You were meeting your friends that night, and had no intention of spending another minute in that kitchen listening to Jungkook act like he could fix three years with a few words.
He stayed where he was while you moved around the house, but you could feel his eyes on you. It shouldn’t have felt unfamiliar, he was your husband. Still, you couldn’t remember the last time he actually noticed you.
but you hated that your body enjoyed the feeling of being noticed by him, hated that some part of you still wanted to be seen by him.
"Can I come?" he asked, from the living room, he sounded quieter than you have ever heard him speak, “I would love to get to know your friends.”
You scoffed out loud in response and left without answering him.
When the door shut behind you, something in your body felt at ease because for the first time in years, your life felt like it belonged entirely to you again.
. . . you’ve heard of him before. sukuna. you knew that apparently, he loved to fuck around with girls, mostly at parties, and got in trouble most of the time because he was a typical fratboy.
he never noticed you, and you never noticed him despite hearing about him from your friend after they spent a night with him.
the first time he actually saw you, was in his English Comp class, where you always raised your hand to answer the professor’s questions. Sukuna noticed how you seemed nothing like the girls he was used to, both personality wise and looks.
didn’t mean you weren’t cute to him.
the first time he tried to charm you (because he was just built like that, of course), it failed miserably.
you were walking down the hallway, talking to the same friend who hooked up with sukuna, when he tapped your shoulder.
you turned around, looking up at him.
“. . . yes?”
he looked down at you, seeing how your cheeks were just so naturally chubby, how you looked so cute—
“wanna go out with me? the ladies say I’m pretty good.” he noticed the girl beside you, looking smug.
a few awkward, slient seconds passed before you responded.
“thanks but uh, I’ll pass. I don’t know you, try another day.” you suppressed a chuckle, glancing at your friend, giving her that look.
so much for a first impression. he’ll just have to try harder.
Jungkook fell in love with you after a disastrous programming midterm during freshman year and has been in love ever since. So when you invite him over after your'boyfriend' suggests you guys take a break, he makes a very stupid offer. Now all he can do is pray you don't slap him across the face and maybe, just maybe comply to his request. He's looking out for you after all, isn't he?
PAIRING: best friend!jk x reader
GENRE: smut, angst
WC: 6.3k
WARNINGS: boyfriend!kai kinda, they're on a 'break' so it's up to you guys to decide if there's infidelity or not, jk's hungry and yearning, unrequited love (gotta write the fluffiest fluff after this), jealousy, smut wise: oral (f receiving), he fucks her w his nose kinda? i don't fucking know, dirty talk, missionary (he's in love okay eg), big d jk but when is he not at this point
NOTES: so if you think you might have seen this before, it’s because you have!!! this is an edited repost because i hated it the first time i posted it. i feel terrible and completely not in my element because i’ve abandoned both this blog and writing for so much longer than i anticipated. pls lmk i can still write and did not lose the entirety of my talent, if i ever had any. lmao love you guys hope you like it <3
The first time Jungkook met Kim Jongin, your tongue was down his throat and your hips were drawing eights on his lap.
Literally.
He remembers it all too clearly because you had introduced your boyfriend approximately five seconds earlier before he pulled you back into his lap like he was trying to prove to the whole world that he had somehow managed to bag a girl like you and wasn't planning on letting anybody forget it. He had spent the whole night with you between his arms as if a sole minute of separation would mean risking losing you to somebody else.
Jungkook still thinks about that day sometimes, with a large emphasis on the sometimes. He thinks about that big, alluring smile on your pretty face when you'd excitedly introduced your boyfriend. He thinks about the sound of your laughter whenever Jongin whispered sweet nothings into your ear, or the way you'd curled closer into his embrace as the night grew darker and quieter like it was the most natural thing in the world. Jungkook still thinks about it all. Sometimes.
Oh how he wishes Jongin really did lose you that day.
But he didn't. In fact, he kept you on his lap for a solid two devastating years.
Not that Jungkook could blame him. He couldn't. Not when he was one glance away from busting a nut the moment he saw you walk into the room that day in his favorite pink skirt of yours.
But the feeling was short lived, only lasting for a few seconds until his eyes dropped down to the man's hand you were holding in your own. Lucky bastard.
You were Jungkook's best friend. So, in retrospect, the ways he'd shamelessly picture you at night were no where near normal. In fact, it made the best friend title he had once loved so much sound utterly ridiculous when said out loud. Because Jungkook was, in the humblest way possible, obsessed with you.
And well, you see, the thing is— Jungkook didn't slowly fall in love with you. Yes, he is in love with you, okay? Life is life and he is long past the point of trying to deny or rationalize the feelings he has for you. You are, in Jungkook's words, an angel fallen from the sky. A temptation disguised as something innocent.
He thinks he would've went to war for you— okay, maybe that is a stretch. But he would crack a one wish willow for you. Responsibly, of course.
Anyways, Jungkook has been in love with you for three entire years and he remembers the exact day it all happened. He remembers the exact moment his heart rate picked up, the exact second he felt birds shitting inside his stomach. He remembers everything.
It happened sometime during freshman year on a random Thursday evening after a truly horrific programming midterm (half the reason why he remembers it so vividly is because of how successfully he managed to fail that exam).
The two of you had ended up sitting on the floor of your tiny dorm room, backs pressed against the sides of your bed, discussing how south your academic careers magically went in the span of ninety minutes.
One minute you were talking normally, making stupid jokes about the fact that neither of you knew where the recursive function was supposed to stop, and next you were crying. Actually crying. All because of the semicolon you forgot to include somewhere between the endless lines of codes you were miserably trying to write and hell handled the rest of it.
He doesn't really remember if the code ever worked, or whether you failed the class as terribly as he did. What he remembers is the way you kept apologizing for crying, as if being upset and vulnerable around him was just so horrible. Unaware of how he was already so down bad he'd give you his kidney if you ever asked.
Even though he knows when, he doesn't really know why. Maybe it was the fact that you trusted him enough to let him see parts of yourself you tried so damn hard to hide, or maybe it was the way you folded into his arms when he hugged you properly for the first time ever, as though your body was made to be molded with his and continue living as one.
But it doesn't really matter, because he's still pathetically in love with you the same way he was three years ago. Maybe now it's even worse.
How can he not be when you look like that? People would sit up straighter when you walked into a room, look up at the sky and the birds and everything in between just to try not to stare too much.
Jongin, however, stared anyway. And the next thing he knew, you were screaming Jongin's name late at night while Jungkook was fisting his own cock wishing it were him instead.
And, despite how sick it sounds when said out loud, the most unfortunate thing according to Jungkook was that you were happy. Like, genuinely happy. Because Jungkook knew it would be easier to move past everything if Jongin was an absolute piece of shit and didn't treat you the way you deserved.
But he did. He made you so happy that even the idea of hating him was logically impossible. Because every time Jungkook tried, and trust me he tried, he'd catch you looking at your boyfriend like he gifted you the stars and suddenly feel like the biggest asshole alive.
But Jungkook never really claimed to be a decent person.
So he hated Jongin anyway. Quietly, in between ugly moments that belonged to the two of you and had nothing to do with him. He hated him when you weren't looking, when you were too upset to care, when you were over the moon and way too happy to notice the pettiness in his eyes.q He hated Jongin without letting you know. He wasn't that terrible of a friend, after all.
The point is, Jungkook watched your relationship take root and bloom into flowers from behind the fence of a beautiful garden and behaved admirably well about it.
He silently counted the remaining petals of your seemingly undying love as months dragged themselves into years. The fragile little bud slowly flourished into a ravishing dahlia and Jungkook watched it bloom. He watched two years pass in a devastating haze as you loved your boyfriend loudly with the kind of devotion that made everybody else in the room gag and roll their eyes in envy.
Now the dahlia is dead.
Jungkook had thought about this before. He'd fantasized about your break up and everything that would come along with it. He thought that when the flower finally faded, all that's left of it would be wilted petals scattered across your apartment floor and your tear strained face laying on his shoulder while you tried to explain through sobs and hiccups exactly how bad said Kim Jongin broke your heart.
Except, when the day finally comes, that's not what happens.
Right now you look…fine?
"You know what his problem is?" You say, irritation written all over your features.
Jungkook, who has spent the last two years hearing the everlasting matters of an impressively detailed list of Kim Jongin's problems, takes a sip from his beer. "Several things come to mind."
You squint your eyes at him, hands dropping at both your sides. "Be serious for a second."
"I am! I'm being dead serious." He says, throwing both hands in air, but the grin on his face keeps on growing.
You don't know why he has been grinning stupidly for the past hour, mostly because you can't really see yourself the way he does. But Jungkook can, obviously. And he can not help that smile from growing as his gaze drifts over you for what must be the hundredth time today, taking in the sight of his favorite hoodie and your bare legs and the fact that you're finally single.
Well, sort of. Kind of. Maybe.
"Okay." You continue. "Tell me if i'm being ridiculous."
"You know i will."
"Good." You say, fixing your posture as Jungkook braces himself for what's to come.
"He asked for a break."
Jungkook blinks. "Okay."
"And then he spends the next four days acting like we're still together. He texts me good morning, sends me TikToks when i'm supposed to be sleeping," You pause, inhaling a short breath. "He went feral yesterday because Mingyu commented under my post."
Oh. Oh.
"And then he proceeds to tell me maybe some distance would be healthy."
Jungkook's eyebrows pull together. "Distance from what?"
"That's what i'm asking!" You exclaim, walking over to the couch, plopping your body next to his. "He's driving me insane."
"That's because he is insane."
You roll your eyes. "God, you hate him."
"That's a reach." You send a look in his way at the words, then he sighs. "Okay, maybe i like him a teeny tiny bit less than the average person."
You groan, dropping your head against the couch cushion. "Knew it."
And besides you, that stupid smile has already made its way back onto Jungkook's lips and it takes a whole lot in you to refrain from throwing the TV remote at his face.
Your head snaps towards him. "Can you stop looking so happy?"
He cocks a brow. "Happy? I'm not happy. I've been sitting here listening to you complain for at least an hour"
"You're enjoying this."
He lets his head fall onto the backrest. "God, i'm not. It's just that you've been miserable for a week and now you're finally angry."
"I've been angry all week." You say like it's obvious.
"No, you were sad."
Okay, to be fair, you never really thought of it like that. But it seems as though Jungkook has and for some reason, he's kind of correct.
You've spent the past week trying to find out what Jongin wanted. You tried so hard to understand and fix and make sense of it all so that you wouldn't need to have this conversation with Jungkook right now. Maybe this is the first time you've let yourself be angry instead and it feels significantly better.
"I think what's bothering me isn't the break." You tuck your legs beneath you, settling further into the couch. "It's that he can't even bother to tell me what's actually going on yet still acts like we're perfectly fine."
Jungkook's eyes lift from the coffee table he was staring at, then turns towards you. "Can i be honest?"
You sigh dramatically, already giving him the permission. "When are you not?"
Jungkook laughs awkwardly, then scratches the back of his neck. Terrible, terrible sign. "I think you're giving him too much power."
You blink. "Jungkook, he's my boyfriend."
God, woman. Do you have to say it like that?
His stomach drops at the word, but doesn't let it show. "I know what he is. What i'm trying to say is, he won't tell you what he actually wants and still you're the one trying to solve it."
You stare at him silently, and he continues. "Maybe this time, focus on what you want instead of losing your mind over what he wants."
Silence paints every corner of the room, coating everything from the pillows and the furniture all the way to the fruit on the table in shades of blue. Until you finally break it.
"What if i don't know?" The way the question leaves your mouth is so small and quiet Jungkook thinks he wants to chew your cheeks until they're pink and puffy.
"Then figure it out." He says instead, then shrugs.
"Wow, your capacity is two logical sentences before you go back to being an unhelpful asshole."
A smile tugs at his lips. "I try my best." He says, then winks as the can of Stella sways carelessly in his hand.
You groan before grabbing a pillow and screaming into it, causing Jungkook to snort and the beer to bubble at the corners of his mouth.
He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, chuckling before speaking. "You really want me to help?"
You nod, swift and immediate, big eyes looking up his face innocently as Jungkook tries so hard not to milk his cock at the way you're currently batting your eyelashes at him.
He sighs, allowing his body to get more comfortable on the soft cushion of your sofa. "I think you should…unwind a little."
Your mouth parts in disbelief. "Of course you would think that!" You exclaim, surprising Jungkook a little by how sudden and loud your voice comes out. "Your sole purpose in life is to fuck every living organism with a pussy and i'm sitting here expecting you to give me solid advice. But it's my fault, i should've known."
Jungkook's eyes widen slightly. "Woah. First of all, ouch, princess. I didn't know you thought of me like that."
Guilt arrives the moment his voice reaches your ears, the sarcastic comment that was once ready to be fired back getting caught somewhere in the middle of your throat before dying out completely.
You didn't mean it like that, that's for sure. But you didn't expect Jungkook to take it the way he did, either. He's still smiling, still looking at you like you're the light of his universe, but there is something behind his eyes that makes your stomach churn and chest sting in a way that almost makes you nauseous.
"Sorry, you know i didn't mean that." You recollect yourself quickly, finding your courage back in the smile he gifts you. "What i'm trying to say is, it's been a week since we broke things off. A week, Jungkook. I'm not even sure if we've really broken up or not."
"What i think," Jungkook settles his beer on the coffee table, then shifts closer to you. "is that this is an excellent opportunity to explore your options." He says, tone dropping down by an octave.
You scoff. "I'm not throwing myself onto a stranger's lap just to relax a little."
"Nobody said anything about a stranger."
Excuse you?
You choke on fucking air, trying to breathe through a constellation of short breaths and coughs. "Sorry, i don't think i'm following." You manage to say once your breath is evened out.
"You know exactly what i mean, princess." Now he's staring straight into your eyes and you're not sure if the way your heart is handling the situation is actually healthy. His voice is quieter, deeper in a way that's the exact opposite to how one should be talking to their best friend.
"You want to…help me unwind?" You ask carefully. Damn that word. What the fuck does it even mean to unwind?
Jungkook places a hand on your thigh, pulling you closer. "Think of it as a…favor. You remember that one time you saved my hamster's life last semester?"
"No," You shake your head, completely and utterly lost in a daze. "No, not really." Yeah. He doesn't either.
He nods slowly, the corners of his mouth curling. "Yeah, you did. So let me return the favor. Please."
You think you're going to throw up. You think you're going to throw up so hard the both of you will be drowned inside the disgusting green liquid and won't ever see the light of day again.
What do you mean Jungkook is asking, begging for you to let him fuck you so that you'll be exploring your options and letting yourself unwind? What do you fucking mean Jeon motherfucking Jungkook, your dear, beloved best friend, is offering himself up just for you to relax a little and take your mind off of your ex-but-not-really-ex-boyfriend?
Okay, in all honesty, you'd be lying to say you've never thought about it. Never seriously, really, but you have. Because, you see; sky is blue, gravity is times ten, and Jeon Jungkook is attractive. Half the female population has reached that conclusion within the first thirty seconds of meeting him and it doesn't take you to make that into a fact.
There had always ben teeny, tiny moments where you'd find yourself thinking about him for a fleeting second longer than you should have. Moments where he'd smile, moments where his biceps would flex a little too deliciously while doing basic human activities essential for survival, moments where somebody would ask if you were together and your stomach would twist for just a fraction of a second before pretending it never happened.
Those moments were very much real and already carved into the history books of you and Jungkook's years long friendship. But you had never thought of it like that, you never let yourself to think about it like that. You were in a fully committed, fully devoted relationship for two whole years, for god's sake.
And you don't even know if you're still in it or not.
Maybe you're reaching and he only wants to do something oh so nice for his best friend. Maybe he's pitying you, maybe he doesn't even find you attractive and the only reason he's doing this is because he's fed up with your sulkings and wants to have a peaceful night for once.
Point is, said Jeon Jungkook is still sitting next to you. He's still looking right into your eyes with his big brown ones. The warmth of his hand is still occupying your thigh and maybe— Maybe, the idea of fucking Jeon Jungkook isn't so bad after all.
You collect every ounce of dignity that's left in you and find your voice. "Do you hear yourself, Jungkook?" You ask, voice quieter than you planned it out to be.
"Crystal fucking clear, princess."
You feel his breath on yours when he says that, and it burns. It burns your lips and your stomach and before you know it, you feel it all the way down between your legs.
"Will you let me?" He says into your ear, and even though the words are barely above a whisper, the weight of them feels so heavy you feel yourself crushing underneath it. Your bare legs are draped over his thick thighs now, the closure of your bodies making it impossibly harder to refrain from crashing your lips into his.
You've completely abandoned every form of coherent thinking as you finally find the fortitude to nod. And before you can do anything reasonable fix it, you feel Jungkook's lips on yours.
He kisses you hungrily, as if he wants you to wither and decay until you exist for him and him only. His hands wrap around your waist while you pull him in deeper by his neck, his fingertips kissing the silver of skin exposed by the thin fabric of your tank top.
Your head feels dizzy as his hands roam all over your body, feeling and carving every inch of your skin into his mind so that he can draw the outline of body and get it inked onto his heart. He pours every ounce of his heart and soul and coats your lips with it, leaving pieces of his love and marking them onto your bare skin.
Jungkook lays you down on the couch, the action feeling way too gentle with his arms wrapped around you, body hovering over yours as his warm tongue swipes against your bottom lip. You're the one to pull away first, because it seems as though Jungkook has the stamina of a fucking dolphin and doesn't need oxygen to survive like the average human.
He stares into your eyes like the entirety of his world is living inside them. You watch the rise and fall of his chest before pulling him in once again, fingers grazing the back of his neck.
When his teeth tugs at your bottom lip, deepening the kiss, your legs part instinctively to accommodate his body. Jungkook starts grinding his hips over your clothed core, and your legs part even wider, then wrap around his waist.
His cock presses deliciously into your core, already so hard and so ready, desperate for any type of friction. And God, is he desperate. This man has spent years dreaming about your warmth and he is going to make every second worth it.
"Jungkook," You moan into his mouth, and Jungkook swallows it right back. He slides his tongue into your mouth at the opportunity, searching you deeper and deeper.
"Gonna take such good care of you." He says after pulling away, placing wet kisses onto your jaw, then your collarbone. He stops when he reaches your chest, hands toying with the hem of your tank top. The only thing you can do is squirm under him.
You give him a consensual nod when he eyes you from below, silently letting him know you want it off of you just as much as he does. Jungkook pulls the thin fabric over your shoulders, then physically falters at the sight of your boobs. And they're not even bare.
He's going to fucking die.
He wants to bury his face in your chest and suffocate between your tits. He wants his lungs to be completely rid of oxygen until he can register nothing but the feeling of your soft boobs against his skin.
He presses a few kisses on the soft swell of your boobs, fingertips tracing lines over the white lace before unhooking your bra. You arch in aid for him, lifting yourself up slightly so that he can reach a little easier. Jungkook lets the lace fabric fall onto the ground near the couch, then gasps audibly at the mere sight of your naked tits.
"Fucking hell." He says, and you can't help but let your chest swell with pride when he reacts oh so desperately, worries you once had of him not finding you attractive disappearing completely.
If Jungkook ever heard that you were self conscious in the slightest bit, he would fuck you so impossibly hard until you understood how weak of a man he was for you— not that he won't regardless.
He takes a nipple into his mouth and toys with the other, flicking the hardened nub between his fingers. The sounds you let out are obscene, pornographic even. You're a mess from so much as him sucking on your tits and Jungkook can only imagine how unreal you're going to sound when he finally fucks you.
He crawls further to the opposite end of the couch, hands fiddling with the zipper of your tiny denim shorts that are a terrible excuse of clothing. Because they cover absolutely nothing and Jungkook has been hard since the moment you opened the door for him earlier.
He pulls down your shorts along with your panties, patience running way too thin to tease you over the delicate lace fabric. There is nothing delicate about this. Jungkook has been starving for years and he is going to make sure you know it.
He spreads your legs, placing both hands on your inner thighs to open you up for him. He feels his breath physically hitch at the sight of your bare pussy right in front of his eyes. Wet, aching and already leaking with arousal. Straight out of his dreams. Literally.
Jungkook hooks your legs over his shoulders, then pulls you closer towards his face. You whimper when he first feels you up with his fingers, dragging his fingertip up and down your slit before opening up your folds, spreading them wide with two fingers.
"Such a perfect fucking pussy. And you've been hiding it from me for years, baby. Letting boys who can't even satisfy you touch you while i'm right here."
He slowly slides a finger inside you, eyes focused on your face as he watches over the way your face evolves through the depths of pleasure.
"Fuck, Koo. More, please." You moan, grinding your hips in air, eager for his touch.
"Yeah? Want more, baby?" He asks, sliding another finger into your pussy, pace devastatingly slow. "Holy shit, you're so fucking wet."
You nod rapidly from above, tears building at the corners of your eyes, pussy aching and begging for his mouth. "Y-yes, yes Koo. So wet for you. Please."
Jungkook complies without another word. He pulls out his fingers before diving into your cunt. He sucks on your clit first, and you cry out in pleasure the second his hot, wet mouth contacts your bare core.
Jungkook moans into your pussy when your hands fly to his hair, fisting his soft locks and pulling him impossibly closer. He slides his tongue down to your aching hole, then places his nose on your clit, having absolutely no desire to leave it untouched.
As he fucks into your hole with his tongue, his nose presses against your clit, and you swear it makes you see white light for a second. Your back arches involuntarily and you keep on tugging at his hair as he forces you to your high, nose continuing to draw circles on your clit as he stimulates your cunt
"Shit, Jungkook, 'm so close." Jungkook's tongue strokes through your folds faster as your cries grow louder and louder. Your thighs shake embarrassingly and your back arches even further when you finally reach your high, and Jungkook grounds you with a hand on your hip through it all, rubbing your clit in circles.
Once you've fully ridden out your orgasm, he licks you clean, slurping the entirety of your juices. "Tastes fucking incredible."
He comes up to kiss you again, letting you taste yourself on his tongue. You tug at the hem of his shirt as he sucks on your bottom lip, then pulls it over his head to grant you your wish.
It takes everything in you and more to not gasp at the sight of his naked body when he pulls down his sweats after. Because suddenly, Jungkook looks like you want to give him three babies and a house.
You have seen him shirtless countless times before. You've went to pool parties and summer vacations and places that require the least amount of clothes. But never has it affected you like this.
You knew Jungkook was attractive. You knew he had a solid physique and a face that would probably be worth millions if he was smart enough to abandon the misery of engineering and pursued modeling instead.
But it had never once felt like you need to drop to your knees and take every inch of his cock into your mouth until he's bleeding and crying and can not produce sperm anymore.
"Like what you see, baby? Want me to fuck you stupid?" He says, stroking himself over the fabric of his boxers as he watches you squirm beneath him.
You nod frantically. "Please, Jungkook." You beg for the nth time in the span of twenty minutes, not even thinking anymore, voice standing somewhere between a cry and a whine.
He drags down his boxers, and your mouth parts at the sight of his bare cock. Because what the actual fuck? Your best friend has been packing, walking around with that all this time and you didn't have a single clue?
Your mouth opens before you can help yourself. "I don't think that's gonna—"
He cuts you off. "It will, baby. If you stop talking and take it like the good girl you are, we'll make it fit."
You shut your mouth immediately after that, laying on the sofa silently as he pumps his length while staring down at you. Legs spread, body spent, everything so hot and messy.
He positions himself at your entrance, dragging his cock over your folds, spreading your slick all over your swollen pussy. He enters you in a pace dreadfully slow, making sure you feel every inch of his length between your wet walls. And god, it's so fucking wet. Arousal is dripping down your pussy all the way to your ass, slick staining the beige fabric of the couch cushions. You almost feel embarrassed at how wet you are, because you're soaking to the point where he'll slide right in without even trying yet he's doing the complete opposite.
You want him to slam into you. You want him to fuck you so hard you cry on his cock. You want Jeon Jungkook to fucking break you because if you think about whatever today will mean for you in the future, for even a split second, you'll cry like a fucking baby.
Because you don't know what to do with any of this. The things he's saying, the way he's looking at you, the way he's holding you…It all feels way too intimate for a guy like him.
You don't know for sure if it's the high speaking but if not, it seems as though your best friend has built entire dreams around you that you never knew existed.
"Do you know how many times i've thought about this? Fantasized about this pretty pussy while you played house with your pathetic little boyfriend?" Yeah, that confirms your worries.
Once he's fully inside you, you feel deliciously stretched, walls clenching around his length. Your back arches off the bed involuntarily and you cry out in pleasure before he even properly thrusts into you.
You don't think you've ever taken a cock this big. Honestly, you don't think anyone else has a cock this big. Certainly, if you did, you'd never shut up about it.
Jungkook finds his pace after you adjust yourself to the stretch, fucking you fast and hard without wasting any more time. But the funny thing is, he looks into your eyes with so much love through it all, as if he isn't fucking you brutally, splitting you open on his massive cock.
He lets out a trenchant moan of your name. "I'm right here." He says, completely lost in the moment, and you'd think he was about to cry if he wasn't pounding into you at a pace so inhumane. "I've always been right here."
You decide to completely disregard his words, grabbing him by the neck and crashing your lips onto his. You need him to stop talking. You need him to shut up and fuck you like it means nothing.
Your head is a mess, your heart isn't beating properly, a million different thoughts pass through your mind, and the way Jungkook is kissing you doesn't help at all. This isn't helping you unwind. Not even close. This is fucking with your head even further and you have no idea the kind of morning you will wake up to tomorrow.
When you cum, it happens big and loud. You cry out his name, legs shaking and back arching off the couch. Jungkook fucks you through it, chasing his own high as you try holding yourself together through the overstimulation, because he fucks you until it hurts.
"Where do you want me?" He asks, voice low and breathy.
You sabotage yourself one last time— hopefully. "Inside, please. Fill me up, Jungkook."
That seems to be the last straw. Jungkook groans loudly, then spills his seeds inside you, making you feel so hot and full. His head falls back as he thrusts into you a few more times. And before you can open your eyes, he collides onto you and the warmth of his body spreads concurs yours.
Afterwards, the sound of your shared breaths and pants are the only indicators of life. His chest stays pressed against yours, breath hot in your ear, sweat trilling down both your bodies and mixing into each other.
The silence feels painful, because you have never experienced it with Jungkook before. There had never once been a moment where you didn't know what to say or what to do when it came to Jungkook. Turns out, there is a first for everything. Because each word, each sentence you construct in different parts of your brain dies down before you can even think about feeling them on your tongue.
Your breathing gradually settles, but your heartbeat doesn't. You stare at the ceiling over his shoulder, because there is absolutely no way you can look into his eyes right now.
You clear your throat first. "Well…
Jungkook lets out something between a breath and a laugh. "Yeah."
"I think," You begin carefully. "That definitely counts as unwinding.",
His lips twitch despite himself, then lifts his body slowly off yours. "I deserve a thank you gift, then."
You scoff. "I'm not gonna suck your dick, Jungkook."
He laughs loudly, reaching for his boxers. "You said it, not me."
A smile lingers on your lips, because for a moment, everything feels normal. The sound of his laugh, the look on his face, the words on his tongue…For a moment, you feel like none of it really happened. Until you look down at your naked body and realize you're desperately in need of covering up.
Jungkook hands you his shirt as if he just read your mind, and you give him a tight lipped smile before sliding it on. "We're…" You start, but your voice trails off.
Jungkook's eyes soften. "We're okay."
But are you really? Because in all honesty, you don't really know what okay feels like anymore. Just five hours ago, Jungkook was your best friend. Now, he's still your best friend. Except you've crossed a line that's now completely blurred. Somewhere between his touch and your heartbeat and all the things he whispered pretending they don't matter, everything started to feel too heavy you're not sure you can continue carrying it all without letting it mean something.
And the problem is so much bigger than Jungkook. You know you love that man. You love him so much your chest aches. Maybe not in the way he so desperately wishes you do, but there is no doubt you'd get there in no time if you gave it a try. So if tonight costs you your best friend, you'll never forgive yourself.
The bigger problem is that, there is still a part of you that belongs to the two years you spent loving Jongin. It's impossible to erase two whole years just because one conversation went wrong and the following days were managed terribly. God, you fucked up bad.
"I don't regret it, i want you to know that."
He exhales slowly. "I do."
"I just…" You search for the right words, but it feels as though they don't exist. "Everything's a mess, i don't know where to go from here." You close your eyes for a brief second, trying to recollect your heartbeat.
"It's only been a few days, and we're not even…officially…" Your voice trails off, because you can not bring yourself to finish the sentence. Because if you say the words out loud, it will feel even more real than it already does.
Jungkook stares at the floor, eyes still stuck there as he starts speaking. "You don't owe me anything."
Your head snaps towards him. "What?"
"This didn't happen because i pity you or something. I don't want you to think that. I know exactly why it happened and however you want to go about this is fine with me."
Your brows pull together. "Why then?"
Jungkook smiles gently, sitting down next to you. "Are you sure you want to hear it right now?" He says, catching your eyes in his.
You nibble at your bottom lip, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes at the silent confirmation he gives you. No, you don't want to hear it right now. What you feel is already way too much and hearing him say it out loud will break you thoroughly if it didn't already.
"I don't want to lose you." You manage to mutter out, voice quiet, the words breaking around the edges.
He offers you another smile, pulling you into his chest. "You won't."
You want to believe him. You want to believe him so fucking bad but it feels like you've already lost parts of him you can never reach again.
And Jungkook knows that. He swears he's in full knowledge of every thought flashing across your mind right now and he can do nothing about it besides comforting you that everything will be okay.
He could tell you. He could finally say the three words that have spent three years trapped inside the dearest corners of his throat. He could tell you that this impulsive mistake wasn't born from a few bottles of beer and a broken heart. He could tell you he'd loved you long before tonight.
But instead, he swallows every word and tucks them right back into where he has kept them locked all this time. He loves you too much to become another lump in your throat, another weight for you to carry. If pretending this means less to him than it does will let oxygen pass easier through your lungs, then he'll pretend.
He has loved you long enough to know he shouldn't be selfish tonight.
And he will continue loving you. Quietly, like he has done all this time. And whenever you let him, if you ever do, he will love you so loudly you'll never be in this position again.
He will lock this memory somewhere safe and offer you the keys whenever you're ready. Until then, he will keep replaying parts of it late at night wishing every form of sorry known to mankind on his heart.
➞ Summary: You and Jungkook have been inseparable since you were six years old. Things take a turn for the worse when you meet your new boyfriend.
➞ Pairing: childhood bestfriend!jungkook x f!reader
➞ Genre: childhood friends to lovers
➞ Warnings: angst, fighting, anxiety attack, emotional manipulation (not Jungkook), belittlement, toxic dating dynamics, mention of substance use (alcohol), mention of cheating, reader goes through a lot </3, eventual fluff!
➞ wc: 8.6k
➞ A/N: This idea popped into my head as I was watching a Jungkook edit ☺️ I'm so proud of this fic, it really became my baby hehe. I hope you all enjoy reading, and if anyone wants me to write anything specific, my reqs are open!
You and Jungkook have been inseparable since you were six years old, two halves of a whole that functioned in the world.
Jungkook was the sun, someone who was bright and constantly pulling everyone into his orbit. He was the one who climbed the highest branch of a tree just to say he did, and the one who talked to everyone.
You were the moon, content to watch from the safety of the sandbox with a book in your lap, always nearby to make sure he never broke anything ever again.
There was a memory you thought about often: a rainy afternoon when you were ten. You had been crying because you’d dropped your favourite strawberry ice cream in the dirt. Jungkook, who was ten shades of muddy because he’d been sliding through grass, sat down right next to you.
"Don't cry," he’d said, his face smudged with dirt. "We’ll just go steal some more from my brother!”
It was a friendship of shared secrets, scraped knees, and getting banana milk whenever either of you were sad.
Years later, nothing had changed, even if your feelings had become complex. It was a Tuesday evening during the summer, and you were sitting on the roof of the shed in Jungkook’s backyard. It was a week before your fourteenth birthday.
Jungkook was lying on his back, staring up at the dark sky, tossing a tennis ball into the air and catching it. He looked comfortable, his hair messy, his white t-shirt clinging to his shoulders. He turned his head to look at you.
"You're quiet tonight.”
"I’m just thinking," you replied, picking at a loose thread on your jeans. You were thinking about how much it hurt to sit this close to him, to smell the familiar scent of his laundry detergent, and know he had no idea you were dying to lean into his space.
Jungkook sat up, reached out, and bumped his shoulder against yours. "You know you can tell me anything, right?”
You looked at him, searching his face for any hint of what he felt, but he just gave you that lopsided grin. "I'm okay, Kook. Just… scared for school to start." It was the best lie you could come up with.
"Well," he said, shifting closer until your knees touched, "We’re a package deal, remember? We don't function right without the other. I’m going to be by your side forever, which means you have nothing to worry about."
You forced a smile, your heart aching so terribly that you thought you would pass out. You were so terrified that if you told him the truth, you’d shatter the friendship that you had.
Then, high school started.
Jungkook became an athlete, which you always knew he would. He was amazing at basketball, and you made sure to go and watch him at every game. Afterwards, you always treated him to some food, knowing he would be hungry after sweating a bucket ton.
You, however, stayed the same. You were still quiet, still loved to read until your eyes began to hurt, and you still loved Jungkook.
On a random weekend, Jungkook invited you over to have dinner. The air in the Jeon household was always the best, the chaos and humour made you feel right at home. You were fifteen, squished between Jungkook and the wall at the dinner table, trying your best to focus on your bowl of kimchi-jjigae.
Jungkook’s mother was occasionally pushing more food toward you. "Eat, Y/N! Jungkook says you’ve been studying so hard lately, you’re a much better influence on him than his friends are."
Jungkook, sitting directly to your right, gave an embarrassed groan. "Eomma, stop, you’re making it weird."
"I’m just being nice!" she countered, before turning her attention to her husband.
His dad was halfway through a story about work, but his eyes kept darting toward you and Jungkook with amusement. Every time his father looked your way, Jungkook would duck his head, his ears turning a shade of red.
Then, there was his older brother, who was sitting on the other side of the table with a glint in his eye. He hadn't stopped teasing you since you walked through the door.
"So, Y/N," his brother said, fidgeting with his chopsticks, "Jungkook told me you were here to 'help him with history.' I didn't hear many pages turning from the living room. Mostly just... laughing."
Jungkook practically choked on his rice. "Shut up, hyung! Seriously."
"I'm just observing!" his brother laughed, leaning forward. "You two are cute, though. Even if you are both terrible at hiding how obsessed you are with each other."
You felt your own face heat up. You stared at your rice, terrified that if you looked up, you’d give away just how much you were reeling from the brushes of Jungkook's leg against yours under the table.
"Leave them alone, honey," Jungkook’s mom scolded, though she was smiling.
You risked a glance at Jungkook. He wasn't looking at his food anymore. He was staring straight at you. He reached out, his hand moving under the edge of the table to squeeze your knee just once, before pulling back.
You caught his eye and felt a wave of certainty wash over you. You were fifteen, you were terrified, and you were in love.
Two years later, everything was still the same.
However, on a Friday night, Jungkook had dragged you from your bed to a party, officially making this the first party you had ever been to. The house was definitely a hazard, with sticky floors, music that blasted through the rooms, and alcohol everywhere. You felt out of place, but you didn’t mind since you had Jungkook with you.
As you began to drink some weird concoction that Jungkook made, he turned to look at you, a bright smile on his face. “Is it okay if I go talk to some of my friends? I promise I won’t be gone for too long.”
In response, you just nodded. You trusted Jungkook enough to know that he would never leave you stranded at a party alone for long.
As you lean against the kitchen island, a tall figure blocked the view in front of you. He looked familiar, you swore you saw him in the hallways at school.
“You go to Crestview, right? I think I’ve seen you before.”
You nodded shyly, your lips formed in a tight line. Talking to new people was not your thing, and you wished you could telepathically talk to Jungkook and tell him to get his ass over here.
"Yeah," you managed to murmur, your voice barely audible over the music thumping through the kitchen walls. You shifted your weight, the soles of your shoes sticking to the drink-splattered tile. "I'm Y/N."
The guy didn't move. He leaned a hip against the island, casually blocking your only exit route toward the living room where Jungkook had disappeared.
"Y/N," he repeated, testing the name like he was deciding if he liked the taste of it. "I’m Jiho. I play with Jungkook. You might’ve seen me before at the games."
He took a sip of his drink, his eyes tracking every look of discomfort on your face. He was clearly enjoying the way you shrank back, and the way your fingers gripped your plastic cup.
"You’re Jungkook's friend, right?" Jiho asked, tilting his head. "I see you two everywhere. He’s pretty protective, isn't he?”
Unease started crawling at the base of your spine. You looked past him, scanning the crowded living room for the flash of Jungkook’s black hair. But all you saw was a blur of strangers.
"He's just… my best friend," you said, your voice rising a bit. You tried to step to the side, but Jiho’s arm braced against the counter, pinning you in.
"Best friend? That’s cute. But you’re at a party now, Y/N. You could actually have a little fun for once.”
Your heart felt like it dropped to your stomach, sweat beginning to cling to your hands. You could feel the start of your anxiety attack coming on, the tightness of your chest and the difficulty breathing was something you dealt with a lot.
“Jungkook really has you on a leash, huh?" Jiho teased. "Can't even handle yourself at a party?"
You couldn't answer. The anxiety was clawing at your throat, and your vision was beginning to darken at the edges. Your hands were shaking so hard you had to grip the counter.
Where is he?
Before Jiho could say anything else, a hand slammed onto his shoulder, pushing him away from the island.
Jungkook was there. His face was a clear mask of silent rage, his entire body going stiff. He stepped directly into the space Jiho had been occupying.
Jungkook didn't acknowledge Jiho at all. He didn't waste a second on him. He turned instantly to you, his entire attitude softening as he looked at your shaking body.
"Hey," he breathed. He reached out, his hands cupping your face, his thumbs brushing against your cheekbones. "Look at me. Y/N, look at me."
You met his eyes, and everything else began to disappear.
"We're leaving," Jungkook said, his voice firm. He didn't look at Jiho, didn't give the other boy the satisfaction of a confrontation. He simply wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you flush against his side.
The moment the car door shut, muffling the noise of the party, he turned to you, his hands framing your face again.
"I am so sorry," he whispered, his forehead pressing against yours, his breath shaky. "I shouldn’t have left you alone, I’m an idiot. I’m so sorry, sweets."
His skin was warm against yours, the feeling calming you down. Sniffling, you pulled back to look at him. “It’s okay. I’m okay now, just… take me to your house.”
The weekend was a moment for you to recover, spending the days in Jungkook’s bed, watching random Marvel movies. Monday came faster than you’d liked. You were at your locker, still feeling raw from Friday night, trying to look for your chemistry textbook.
Then, the crowd seemed to part, and there was Jiho.
He wasn't wearing his usual smirk. His shoulders were slumped, and he had a boyish look that felt entirely out of place on his face. He leaned against the locker next to yours.
"Y/N," he said, his voice almost hesitant. He kept his hands visible, open and palms up. "Can we talk? Just for a second?"
You gripped the edges of your locker door. "I don't think we have anything to talk about, Jiho."
He winced. "I know. I deserve that. I was an asshole. I don't know what I was thinking, coming at you like that while you were overwhelmed. I just… I reacted like an idiot. I’m really, really sorry."
He stepped closer, slightly hovering. "I’ve been miserable all weekend thinking about it. I just… I got intimidated by your friend, and I lashed out. I’m not like that, Y/N. I promise."
You felt a flicker of doubt. He sounded so reasonable, so apologetic.
He looked at you with wide, soulful eyes. "I want to make it up to you. I want to show you the real me, not the guy who had too much to drink on Friday. Can I take you out to dinner this weekend?”
You felt the familiar tightness return to your chest, but it wasn't the anxiety from the party. It was the optimism of wanting to believe in the best of people. The contrast of Friday night made him seem like someone who had genuinely learned his lesson. Maybe you had been too quick to judge him, just as he said.
You looked at him, searching for something in his eyes, but all you saw was regret.
"Okay," you whispered, the word feeling surprisingly light on your tongue. "I’d like that."
Jiho’s smile was warm. "I’ll pick you up at seven on Saturday, then? You won't regret it, Y/N."
As he turned and walked down the hall with a confident step, you felt a strange sense of excitement. Soon after, Jungkook reached your locker. "Hey, are you ready for first period? I’ve got your notes."
"I’m ready," you said, your voice firmer than usual. "But, um... Jungkook? I’m busy Saturday night. Jiho asked me out, and... I think I’m going to go."
Jungkook froze. His hand dropped from your back as if he’d been burned. The light in his eyes flickered, replaced by confusion. "You said yes? After what happened on Friday? Y/N, you don't know him."
"That’s why I’m going out with him," you said, feeling the sting of his judgment. "So that I can get to know him. People can change, Jungkook. Not everyone is as bad as you want me to believe."
Jungkook stared at you. He didn't argue, he just nodded, his expression changing into something distant and unrecognizable.
"Alright," he said, his voice devoid of its usual warmth. "If that’s what you want."
He turned and walked away, his stride long and solitary. You watched him go, regret filling up in your chest, but you pushed it down. You were going on your first date ever; you were doing something for yourself.
When Jiho pulled up to your house in his sedan, he looked nothing like the boy from the party. He was wearing a crisp shirt, and he leaned against the hood with a practiced grace.
"You look beautiful," he said as you approached, his voice smooth. He even opened the passenger door for you.
The restaurant he chose was fancy, too fancy for your liking. For the first hour, he was the perfect date. He asked questions about your favourite authors, your dreams for after high school, and the classes you hated. He made you feel like you were the only person in the room, the same way Jungkook did. But there was something softer when it was Jungkook looking at you.
"I’m sorry again about the other night," he said midway through the meal, his eyes dropping to his plate. "I was drinking, and I was frustrated with myself. I saw you and Jungkook, and I… I projected. I’ve always been a bit jealous of him. I wanted to see if I could make you laugh the way he does."
"I'm not like the guy at the party," he added, reaching across the table to cover your hand with his. "I’m just a guy who saw someone he wanted to get to know, and I went about it the wrong way. I hope you can give me the benefit of the doubt."
You let your hand stay under his. It felt nice to be treated like an adult, to be courted by someone who wasn't treating you like a "best friend.”
When the waiter came to check on your table, Jiho didn't smile at him. He sent a dismissive nod that made the waiter stutter an apology. When he thought you weren't looking, his eyes would scan the room, not with the interest he showed you, but with a cold gaze that made him look terrifying.
"So," he said, taking a sip of his water. "Are we going to talk about the elephant in the room? Or are you going to keep checking your phone to see if Jungkook is texting you?”
You froze, your phone sitting face-down on the table. "I wasn't checking for him."
"Good," Jiho said, his voice dropping an octave. He leaned in, the candlelight casting deep shadows across his face. "Because that’s the thing about your little shadow, Y/N. He doesn't want you to have a life outside of him.”
A shiver of genuine anxiety crawled up your spine. You knew for certain that Jungkook would never treat you like that, or even have thoughts in that sort of way. You didn’t even have words to explain how caring, genuine, and emotionally intelligent Jungkook was.
"He's not like that," you said sharply, your eyebrows furrowing.
Jiho smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. "You’re so naive. It’s charming, really." He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, his thumb grazing the skin of your neck with a pressure that was too firm. "But you’re with me tonight."
The restaurant felt incredibly small, and the air changed. You had come here wanting to believe he had changed, wanting to prove Jungkook wrong, but as you looked into Jiho’s eyes, all you wanted to do was get up and run away.
The squeak of sneakers against the floor of the gym usually sounded satisfying to Jungkook, but today it just sounded like noise. Practice had run twenty minutes late because the coach was furious about their defensive rotation in the previous game, and by the time Jungkook shoved open the door to the locker room, he was already exhausted, his muscles aching.
The room smelled of sweat, damp towels, and heavy body spray. Most of the guys had already showered and bolted for the weekend, leaving only a few lingering by the lockers. Jungkook tossed his gym bag onto the bench in front of his locker, unlaced his high-tops with a tired sigh, and yanked his white practice jersey over his head, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the hem.
He was halfway through unbuckling his gear bag when a familiar voice cut through the hum of the shower room.
"I'm telling you, it's pathetic," Jiho laughed, his voice bouncing off the tiled walls. He was leaning against the row of lockers two aisles down, a towel draped around his neck as he tossed a damp wristband into his duffel.
Jungkook didn't stop moving, but his hands froze on the zipper of his bag. He didn't care about Jiho’s usual locker-room talk. Jiho spent half his life bragging about parties and girls he barely knew, and Jungkook usually made a point of tuning him out.
"Who's pathetic?" muttered Minho, one of the junior guards, who was tying his shoes nearby.
"Jungkook’s little friend," Jiho whispered, thinking he was quiet enough. "Y/N. Did you see her at the quad yesterday? Just sitting there on the stone wall, waiting for Jungkook to finish practice."
Jungkook’s spine went rigid. Every movement in the locker room seemed to slow down, the noise fading into a buzzing in his ears.
"I'm just saying," Jiho scoffed, closing his locker with a bang that echoed. He lowered his voice. "She’s an easy target. All quiet and untouchable because Jungkook treats her like she's made of glass. But honestly? Give her a couple of drinks, strip away that whole innocent act, and I bet she’d fold in two seconds. Someone just needs to show her what a real guy is like instead of some kid who carries her books around."
A heavy silence dropped over the locker room. Minho didn't answer; he just grabbed his bag and hurried out the side exit, sensing the shift in the atmosphere.
Jungkook didn't say a word. He didn't yell. But the blood rushed so loudly in his ears that it sounded like an ocean. Every muscle in his body coiled tight, his knuckles turning stark white as he gripped the edge of the metal bench. The image of Y/N being entirely unaware of the way people like Jiho talked about her behind closed doors, flashed in his mind.
Jiho was still smirking, digging through his bag for his car keys, when a hand suddenly caught the front of his damp practice tee. With a jerk that took zero effort, Jungkook hoisted him backward, slamming Jiho’s spine directly against the metal lockers with a crash that rattled the entire row.
Jiho’s breath left him in a sharp wheeze, his eyes going wide with panic as his keys flew out of his hand and clattered across the floor. "What the fuck—!"
"Say her name again," Jungkook whispered. His voice was terrifyingly quiet, shaking with rage. His face was inches from Jiho’s, his eyes burning into the older boy's. "Go on. Say it again."
Jiho’s hands instinctively came up to grab Jungkook’s wrists, trying to pry him away, but Jungkook didn't budge an inch. The fury radiating off him made Jiho’s smug expression dissolve into disbelief.
"Jungkook, what the hell is your problem?" Jiho choked out, his heels lifting slightly off the floor as Jungkook kept him pinned against the steel. "Let go of me."
"You think she's a game?" Jungkook snarled. "You think you can sit here and talk about her like she's some prize to win? You don't know the first thing about her."
"I was just joking around, come on—" Jiho started, just as Jungkook’s grip tightened, twisting the fabric of his shirt until it choked him.
"Next time you even mention her," Jungkook interrupted. "I won't just pin you to a locker. Do you understand me?"
Jungkook held him there for a second longer before he shoved him away with a disgusted flick of his wrists. Jiho stumbled backward, catching himself against the bench, coughing and straightening his shirt.
Jungkook didn't look at him again. He turned on his heel, walked back to his locker, and grabbed his gym bag. His hands were still trembling, not from fear, but from the adrenaline screaming through his veins. He threw the bag over his shoulder, ignored Jiho completely as the boy scurried out the side door without another word, and walked out into the cool evening air.
It was a Tuesday afternoon in the library. You were shoving your textbooks into your bag, trying to act like your heart wasn't racing, when Jungkook finally walked over. He didn't say a word at first, just stood there with his hands shoved deep into his hoodie pockets, staring at a random spine on a bookshelf like it held the secret to the universe.
"I’m going to dinner with Jiho tonight," you blurted out. You hadn't planned on saying it, and you certainly didn't mean for it to sound like a challenge.
Jungkook went completely still. He didn't even look up at you, but his shoulders locked up, and you could see the muscles in his jaw working as he ground his teeth.
"We’re dating, Jungkook," you added, your voice rising. "I thought you should know."
He finally looked at you, and the sight of him actually hurt to witness. He looked pale, and his eyes, which were usually so bright and full of life, looked tired and sad. It wasn't the version of him you had grown up with; it looked like he was fighting a losing battle to keep himself from falling apart right there and then.
"Dating," he repeated. The word sounded wrong in his mouth. He let out a dry laugh. "You’re dating him."
"Yeah," you said, gripping the strap of your bag tightly. "And look, he’s not who you think he is. You’ve been wrong about him this whole time. He’s actually been… really great to me."
"Great," Jungkook said, his voice dropping into a rasp that made your skin prickle. He took a step towards you. "Is that what he calls it? When he keeps you away from everyone? When he talks about me like I’m some kind of loser you need to get away from? Y/N, I see how he looks at you. He doesn't actually like you. He’s just trying to change you into something he can control, and you’re letting him."
"Stop it!" you snapped, your heart racing. "You don't get to say that. You don't get to decide who I date or what’s good for me. You act like you’re just 'protecting' me, but honestly? It feels like you’re just trying to make decisions for me."
Jungkook looked like you’d physically hit him. The hurt in his eyes was so obvious it made your stomach drop, a wave of nausea rolling over you. He stared at his shoes for a long second, his chest hitching as he tried to catch his breath, before he forced himself to look back up at you.
"I'm not trying to control you," he said quietly, his voice cracking at the edges. "I was just trying to make sure you didn't get hurt. But I guess I should’ve known better. I should’ve known you’d eventually pick the guy who tells you whatever you want to hear, even if he’s the same guy talking weirdly about you in the locker room."
You froze, your hands tightening on the strap of your bag. "What are you talking about?"
"You think I made that up?" Jungkook asked, a broken sound slipping past his lips. "You think I just invented that conversation because I was jealous? I heard him, Y/N. I heard him telling the guys that you were an easy target, that you'd fold in two seconds if someone bought you a drink. I pinned him to the lockers because he was laughing at you.”
The words hit you with a sickening jolt. For a second, your defensive armour cracked, doubt piercing straight through you.
What if he wasn't lying? What if he really heard him?
But the stubbornness you had wrapped around yourself for weeks flared up instantly, refusing to let you break. You couldn't afford to admit he was right, not here, not now, when you had already pushed him away.
"You're just saying that now because you're angry," you lied, your voice shaking as you forced the words out. "You'll say anything to make me look stupid for not listening to you."
Jungkook stared at you, the last flicker of argument dying entirely in his eyes. He didn't look angry anymore. He just looked exhausted.
"I'm not trying to make you look stupid," he said softly, shaking his head. "I was just trying to protect you."
He didn't yell. He didn't beg. He just turned around and walked toward the door. He didn't look back, and you didn't call his name to stop him. You just stood there in the aisle, feeling like your life was crumbling before your very eyes.
Even as you stood there, you shoved your feelings for him into a corner of your mind. You told yourself that Jungkook was just being dramatic, that he was just jealous and unable to let go of the way things used to be. You forced yourself to breathe, pushing down the horrible feeling in your chest by focusing on the image of Jiho.
You tightened your grip on your bag, determined to bury your feelings for Jungkook under layers of stubbornness, choosing to walk toward the exit and away from the only person who had ever really known you.
He’s just being dramatic, you told yourself, the thoughts becoming more familiar with every step. He’s just used to being the only guy in my life.
You met Jiho by his car in the student parking lot. He was leaning against the driver’s side door, checking his watch, but the second he saw you, his face lit up with that polished smile. He didn’t ask why your eyes were glassy or why your hands were still shaking slightly as you reached the passenger side. He just opened the door for you.
"Everything okay?" he asked as he slid into the driver's seat, his hand brushing against your knee before he started the engine. "You look a little worked up."
"I'm fine," you said, your voice a little too strained. You stared out the window, watching the streets of the neighbourhood blur past. "Just had a long day."
Jiho hummed, his fingers drumming against the steering wheel. "Let me guess. Jungkook gave you a hard time?"
You stiffened. "He was just… being difficult. It’s over now."
"Good." Jiho reached over, his hand finding yours on the center console. He didn't let go, even as he navigated through the heavy traffic. "You don't need that kind of negativity in your life, Y/N. I told you, you’re better off without him dragging you down."
You nodded, staring at his hand on yours. A familiar ache started to pulse again. It was the feeling of a phantom limb, the space beside you where Jungkook used to stand, the sound of his laugh that you were terrified of forgetting.
Every time Jiho spoke, you caught yourself comparing his tone to Jungkook’s. When Jiho squeezed your hand, you instinctively thought about the way Jungkook used to hold your wrist to steady you when you were panicking.
"Where should we eat?" Jiho asked, his voice breaking through your thoughts. "I was thinking about that new place downtown. It’s fancy, quiet."
"Sure," you said, trying to sound excited.
You squeezed your eyes shut, pushing your feelings down. When you opened them again, you put on your most convincing smile and turned to Jiho.
"Downtown sounds perfect," you said, your heart aching.
One night, while sitting in Jiho’s car after a party that he dragged you to, where he made you watch and sit as he talked to his obnoxious, rude friends, you watched him scroll through his phone, his thumb tapping on the screen as he smirked at a message from someone else. He didn't even care that you were there, staring at the side of his face.
“Who are you texting?” Your voice cut through the silence of the car.
Jiho didn’t even look up. He let out a huff, his thumb still tapping against the glass of his phone screen. "Don't start with this, Y/N. Keep it together."
"I'm not doing anything," you said. "You’ve been on your phone since we walked out of the party. You haven't said two words to me, and you're sitting there smirking like you're talking to someone you actually like. Who is it?"
He finally stopped scrolling. He slowly tilted his head toward you, his expression patronizing, the way you’d imagine someone looking at a pet that was acting out. "You’re being so dramatic. You wouldn't find it funny anyway. Now, stop before you embarrass us both."
"Embarrass us?" You let out a humorless laugh. "Jiho, you’ve been ignoring me for three hours, talking to your friends like I’m not even here. Who is the message from?"
He tossed his phone onto the center console between you. It slid across the leather and stopped right near your hand. The screen glowed, a notification from a contact simply named 'D.'
"Fine," he said, his voice dropping. "You want to know? It’s Dahye. She’s pretty, she’s interesting, and she doesn't spend her entire night hovering over my shoulder. You’re boring, Y/N."
The insult was so blunt, so cruel, that it didn't even hurt. You stared at the phone, seeing the 'D' glowing on the screen, and for the first time in a month, the fog in your head cleared.
"You're a hypocrite," you whispered. "You're acting like this, but you're the one who talks behind people's backs. Jungkook was right about you."
Jiho froze, his expression twisting into an ugly scowl. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"The locker room," you fired back, your voice shaking with humiliation. "You called me an easy target, laughing about how I'd fold in two seconds if someone bought me a drink. He didn't make that up. You said it."
"Oh, please. So what if I was joking around with the guys?" Jiho sneered, turning his head to glare at you. "So, you’re going to run back to Jungkook because of some locker room talk? Figures."
Hearing him say it out loud made your stomach violently turn. The sheer arrogance in his voice stripped away any lingering doubt you had left.
"He tried to warn me, and I yelled at him. I chose you because I thought he was just being jealous."
He started the engine, the car roaring to life. "Yeah, and I clearly made a mistake asking you out. You’re pathetic. Honestly, you should be thanking me for making your life better. You actually had a real life, had some fun for once in your damn life, instead of just sitting around in your room."
The audacity of his words finally snapped the last thread of sanity you had left. "You know, you’re right, I was a 'nobody' before you. But at least when I was a nobody, I actually liked who I was. I don't know who I am anymore, but I hate it. You didn't give me a life, Jiho.”
"You’re delusional. You'll be begging to come back the second you realize nobody is going to put up with your quiet act." He snarled, the look in his eyes making you want to strike him across the face.
"Then I guess I'll be alone," you said, already reaching for the door handle.
"Y/N, where are you going?" he called out, his voice sharp with annoyance. "We aren't done talking."
You turned back just once, your hand on the doorframe. "We’re done, Jiho. Don't call me."
You slammed the door shut. You didn't wait to see his reaction; you just started walking. You didn't even know where you were going, only that you needed to put as much distance between yourself and him as possible.
Your legs felt like jelly, and the further you walked, the more your composure crumbled. The first sob caught in your throat, and soon the tears were streaming down your face, blurring your vision. You were walking blindly, the reality of the past month finally crashing down on you all at once.
You fumbled for your phone in your pocket, your fingers shaking so hard you almost dropped it. You didn't even think about it; your thumb hovered over his name before you could talk yourself out of it. You hit call, holding the phone to your ear.
It didn't even make it through the first ring.
"Y/N?" Jungkook’s voice was instant. He didn't even wait for a hello. “Are you okay?”
"Kook," you choked out, the tears streaming down your face so fast you could barely see the sidewalk. You stopped walking your knees feeling weak. "I... I can't do it. I'm done. I'm so, so done."
There was silence on his end, followed by the sound of him scrambling, shoes hitting the floor, and a door opening. "Where are you? Tell me exactly where you are."
"I'm by the old park," you sobbed, letting the phone slide down slightly as you buried your face in your free hand. "I just... I just walked out on him."
"Stay right there," he commanded, his voice grounding you. "Don't move. I’m coming to get you. I'm already halfway out the door, Y/N. Just breathe for me. I'm coming."
The line stayed open. You could hear him running, the sound of his sneakers on pavement, his heavy breathing filling out the silence. He didn't hang up.
"I can see you," he said, his voice sounding like it was coming from the end of the street rather than the speaker.
You looked up, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand. A few seconds later, he rounded the corner. He looked breathless, his hair a mess from the wind. He wasn't running anymore; he slowed down when he saw you.
He stopped just a few feet away. His eyes were scanning your face, taking in the tears and the way your shoulders were shaking. He didn't say a word; he just reached out, closing the gap and pulling you into his arms.
He held you so tight you could feel the fast beat of his heart against your own. You pressed your face into his shoulder, the scent of him washing over you. You sobbed into his shirt.
"I've got you," he whispered into your hair, his voice cracking as he began to tear up."You're okay. You're safe now."
"I was so miserable, Kook," you gasped out, your voice muffled by his hoodie. "I felt like a horrible person.”
He pulled back just enough to look at you, his hands moving to cup your face. His thumbs brushed away the tears on your cheeks, his touch incredibly gentle.
"You're not horrible," he said. "You're right here. And I’m not letting you go back to him. I’m not letting anyone else make you feel like you’re anything less than exactly who you are."
He leaned his forehead against yours, both of you breathing in the same rhythm. You looked into his eyes, and the world felt like it was back to normal.
"Take me home?" you whispered.
He didn't hesitate. "Always."
He kept his arm around your waist the whole walk. The house was dead silent when you got there, since your parents were away. Jungkook didn't say a word; he just took your keys, unlocked the door, and stepped back to let you inside first. It was a small thing, but it felt like he was giving you your space back.
Once you were in your bedroom, you dropped onto the edge of the bed, feeling completely exhausted. Jungkook walked straight to the window and shut it, locking it with a sharp click. He walked over to your bed, and sat down beside you.
"Talk to me," he said, his voice barely a murmur. "What happened tonight?"
You stared down at your hands, finally letting it all out. "It started in the car, after we were at a party. He ignored me the entire time, and when we got into the car, he was texting someone. I asked him who it was, and he told me it was… some girl named Dahye.”
"He told me I was lucky he even asked me out," you continued, the shame still stinging. "He said I was a 'nobody' before he started paying attention to me."
Jungkook let out a frustrated breath, his knee bouncing up and down. "He doesn't know the first thing about you. You’re not a nobody, Y/N. You’re everything to me, and you mean the world to everyone else as well.”
"I stayed away because you told me to. Because you looked at me and you seemed so sure. But every day was horrible. I felt like I was losing my mind, just waiting for the phone to ring, hoping you’d realize he was the one holding you back." He continued talking, his hand stroking yours.
"I missed you so much," you confessed. "I kept thinking if I just tried harder, if I was just better, he’d be the guy I wanted him to be. I was trying to… forget how I felt about you.”
The moment those words came out, Jungkook froze, and he didn't move at all, as if the slightest breath might break the reality of what you had just admitted.
"Forget how you felt about me?" The moonlight caught the disbelieving look in his eyes as he looked up at you. All the protective anger he’d been holding onto moments ago dissolved.
You nodded slowly as tears spilled again. "I was terrified, Kook. Everything with you was... it was too real. It mattered too much, and when Jiho came along, he seemed nice. I thought if I just threw myself into that, the noise in my head about you would stop. I thought I could force myself to love someone else so I wouldn't have to face what I felt. But none of that worked because, the truth is, I’ve been in love with you since we were fourteen, and I’ve spent every day since then trying to pretend I wasn't."
A bitter laugh escaped your lips. "And look how that turned out. I let him shrink me down into nothing just so I wouldn't have to admit that every single time I was with him, I was just wishing he was you."
Jungkook didn't wait another second. His hands came up to frame your face, his long fingers trembling slightly against your skin as he forced you to look into his eyes.
"You idiot," he breathed out. "You complete idiot."
"I know," you whispered, choking on a sob. "I'm sorry. Kook, I'm so—"
"Don't you dare apologize for being scared," he cut you off, his voice soft but intense. "Do you have any idea what it was like for me? Watching you smile at his stupid jokes and shrink yourself down just to fit into his life, while I was sitting right there, losing my mind because I thought you actually wanted him over me?"
He leaned closer, his forehead pressing against yours, his warm breath fanning across your lips.
"I thought I lost my chance," Jungkook murmured, his thumb tracing your cheekbone, catching a stray tear. "Every night you were with him, I would stare at my ceiling, trying to convince myself to just let you go if he made you happy. But he didn't make you happy, Y/N. He was draining the life out of you. And every time I saw you look tired, or quiet… it broke me because I knew I could love you so much better than he ever could."
The honesty of his words hit you, knocking out whatever remaining defences you had left. You reached up, your fingers tangling into the fabric of his hoodie, pulling him closer until there was no space left between you.
"I'm not trying to forget anymore," you whispered against his skin, burying your face into the crook of his neck.
Jungkook’s arms wrapped around you, pulling you completely into his lap, holding you so tightly it felt as though he were trying to mesh the two of you together so no one could ever pull you apart again. He buried his face in your hair, letting out a breath.
"Good," he murmured into your hair, his lips pressing a lingering kiss right against your temple. "I’m never letting you go ever again."
"I missed this," you whispered, the words barely audible against his skin. "I missed us."
Jungkook pulled back just enough to look at you, scanning every inch of your face. He didn't seem satisfied until he saw the stress finally leaving your shoulders. He reached up, his thumb brushing your lower lip, his gaze dropping to your mouth with a look so intense it made your breath hitch.
"You're not missing it anymore," he promised. "I'm right here."
He leaned in, giving you every second to pull away if you needed to, but you didn't. You leaned into him, closing the tiny distance until his lips finally met yours.
The kiss was everything you had been denying yourself for years. It wasn't like the kisses you'd had with Jiho; it was refreshing, like coming up for air after being underwater for too long.
When he finally pulled away, he stayed close. "I'm staying. I'm not leaving you here by yourself while you're feeling like this. I’m staying right here, on this floor, or in that bed, or wherever you want me to be. I'm not leaving your sight until you're ready."
You felt happy, the kind of feeling you hadn't felt in a while. "Stay here," you said, reaching out to lace your fingers through his hair. "Please. Just stay."
He didn't need to be told twice. He shifted, moving the two of you until you were both settled on the mattress, the tangled mess of limbs feeling like the most natural thing in the world. He pulled the blanket over both of you, and pulled you back into his chest.
For a long while, neither of you said anything. Jungkook’s hand moved in slow motions across your back, his fingertips tracing your spine through your shirt. His touch was soft, as if he was trying to reassure himself that you were here with him, instead of out in the cold with Jiho.
“Kook?” you murmured, your voice slightly muffled because of his collarbone.
“Hmm?” he hummed in response, his hand continuing to move against your back.
You took a deep breath in, shifting enough to look at him. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, “I’m sorry for not believing you, or listening to you.”
Jungkook went still, his beautiful, big eyes staring back at you. Then, he shook his head, pulling you closer to rest his chin against the crown of your head. “I forgive you. I forgave you before you even knew it. I’m just glad you realized before it got worse.”
You nodded in agreement, inhaling deeply. “I know. He… was just awful. You tried to tell me, and you tried to protect me, but I… I just pushed you away because I hated feeling like I couldn’t handle things on my own.”
"You can handle things," he said softly, his tone completely devoid of any smugness. "You're stronger than you think, Y/N. That's part of the problem. You try to carry everything all by yourself until it breaks you."
You closed your eyes, a tear slipping silently down your cheek onto his shirt. "I hated it," you confessed, your voice cracking. "Every day with him, I felt like I was shrinking. I kept looking for you in every crowded room, and when you weren't there, it felt like I was dying."
At that, Jungkook’s arms tightened around you, a protective instinct flaring up in him. He pressed another tender kiss into your hair, his lips staying against your skin.
"I know," he whispered fiercely against your temple. "I know because I was doing the exact same thing. Every day at practice, every time I walked past your locker and you weren't there... it felt like walking through glass. I hated him for looking at you, but mostly, I hated myself for not being able to stop you from making a mistake."
"You tried," you reminded him softly, a smile touching your lips. "You literally pinned him to a locker."
Jungkook let out a chuckle that vibrated right through you, the tension evaporating from his shoulders. "Somebody had to. The guy was a complete asshole."
"He really was," you agreed, letting out a breath.
The silence settled over the room again, more comfortable this time. You never thought in a million years that you would be lying with him like this. There was always a voice in the back of your head telling you that this was impossible.
"Hey," Jungkook whispered after a long while, his voice dropping into a sleepy register that always made your heart melt.
"Yeah?"
"We're going to sleep in tomorrow," he promised. "And then tomorrow afternoon, we're going to that convenience store down the street, and we're buying all the junk food we used to hide from your mom when we were twelve."
You smiled against his chest, feeling warmth bloom in your chest. "It's a plan."
"Good," he murmured, his breathing slowing down. He pressed one final, lingering kiss to your forehead, his arm securing you against him like a fortress against the dark. "Close your eyes, Y/N. I've got you. I'm not going anywhere."
And for the first time in years, you slept more comfortably than you ever have.
The sound of a plastic bag crinkling at 2:00 AM was enough for you to groan into your pillow.
"If you continue to keep me up with those spicy chips, I am going to feed you to a pack of coyotes," you mumbled into your pillow, your voice thick with annoyance as you buried your face deeper into the mattress.
A fit of laughter vibrated from across the room. The mattress dipped, the weight of him moving closer before a cold foil bag was dropped right onto the center of your back.
"First of all, they're not just spicy chips, they're limited edition," Jungkook’s voice was close. "Second of all, your parents are three cities away, so it’s not like I’m disturbing anyone but you.”
You groaned, pushing yourself up onto your elbows and glaring at him over your shoulder. He was sitting cross-legged on the bed, wearing an oversized black t-shirt that had clearly seen better days and a pair of sweatpants hanging low. He held up a red-dusted chip, his dark eyes sparkling with amusement.
"Open," he commanded, leaning forward.
"I hate you," you muttered, but you opened your mouth anyway.
The moment you bit down, artificial chili and lime hit your tongue, making your eyes water. You let out a strangled cough, swatting blindly at his chest. "Water! Give me water, you psychopath—"
He immediately grabbed the plastic water bottle sitting on your nightstand, laughing deviously as he passed it. “Oh, c'mon! It’s not even that bad!” he leaned back, reaching his hand in the bag to grab another piece of the devil chips.
Yanking the water from his hands, you chugged the entire thing until nothing was left. “Not that bad? Jungkook, you almost killed me!”
"But you survived, didn't you?" Jungkook grinned, unapologetic as he tossed another chip into his mouth and chewed with satisfaction. "And honestly, it builds character."
"My character is fine. Yours, on the other hand, is currently rotting away behind a bag of chips," you shot back, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and letting yourself flop backward onto the pillows.
The mattress shifted again as Jungkook crawled closer, his long frame settling right beside you. A moment later, his warm arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you against his side whether you wanted to move or not.
"Okay, fine. I'll make it up to you," he murmured, his voice softening, making your chest do a stupid little flip. His free hand reached up, fingers gently brushing a stray lock of hair away from your forehead. "What do you want? I'll do whatever you say."
You turned your head on the pillow to glare at him, though it was hard to maintain when he was looking down at you like that.
"Whatever I say?" you tested, a smirk curving your lips as a brilliant idea popped into your head.
Jungkook raised an eyebrow, suddenly looking just a little bit suspicious, but he nodded. "Yeah. Name it."
"Good," you whispered, rolling over and pinning him against the mattress before he even had time to blink. "Because right now, you're going to crawl your lazy ass downstairs, make me an actual grilled cheese, and bring it back up here on a plate like a good boyfriend."
Jungkook let out a dramatic gasp of betrayal, his hands coming up to rest lightly on your hips as he stared up at you in mock horror. "A good boyfriend? After I graciously shared my limited-edition snacks with you?"
"Get moving, Kook," you laughed, pressing a teasing kiss to his jawline before pushing yourself up. "Unless you want me to tell your mom about how you've been eating chips in bed at 2:00 AM."
He groaned, rolling his eyes dramatically toward the ceiling, but a helpless smile was already breaking across his face as he pushed himself up off the mattress.
The click of the bedroom lock was quiet, but to Jin, it sounded like a heavy iron vault slamming shut forever.
He stood frozen in the middle of the quiet living room, staring at the closed wooden door. The silence in the penthouse was suffocating, heavy with the absolute weight of what he had just done. His chest heaved as he swallowed hard, trying to push down the rising panic that was clawing its way up his throat.
I called her a gold digger.
The thought burned through his brain like acid. Of all the cruel, unforgiving things he could have said, he had accused the only woman who had ever loved him for his heart—the only person in his entire world who didn't care about his title, his family's wealth, or his stock options—of wanting his money.
Jin slowly walked over to the bedroom door. He raised a hand, resting his knuckles against the wood, trembling.
"Y/N?" he called softly, his voice cracked and stripped of all its usual corporate polish. "Sweetheart, please..."
No response came from inside. Not a sound, not a breath.
"I didn't mean it," he whispered, pressing his forehead against the cold wooden frame, closing his eyes tightly as tears finally burned his own lashes. "I'm sorry. God, I'm so sorry, Y/N. I was angry, I was panicked, I... please open the door. Just talk to me."
Inside the dark bedroom, you were sitting on the edge of the mattress, your hands folded tightly in your lap. Hearing his desperate voice on the other side of the door didn't bring you any satisfaction. It didn't make you feel victorious or validated. It only made the deep, hollow ache in your chest throb harder.
Slowly, you stood up, walked across the floor, and unlocked the door. You pulled it open, standing in the doorway with a completely blank, exhausted expression.
"What?" you asked quietly.
Jin took a sharp, breath at the sight of you.
"I was out of line," he choked out, the words tumbling out of him in a desperate, breathless rush. The powerful Kim Seokjin was utterly unraveled, his chest heaving under his crisp white shirt, his eyes glossy and bloodshot. "What I said... it was disgusting. You've never, not once in three years, asked me for a single thing. I know that. God, I know that better than anyone. I was terrified, sweetheart. I felt like I was losing control, like I was losing you, and I lashed out like a coward."
He reached for your hands, his fingers trembling as he encased your hands within his ones, gripping you like a drowning man reaching for a lifeline.
"Please don't talk about leaving. Don't talk about returning the penthouse or giving up the gifts. I built all of this for you," he begged, his voice breaking as a single tear escaped his eye, tracking down his sharp cheekbone. "I know things have been chaotic. I know I've been distant and stressed with work, but I can fix it. I will fix everything, I promise you."
You didn't pull your hands away, nor did you squeeze his back. You just watched him, watching the man you worshipped completely lose his mind over a lie he was still actively maintaining.
Jin took a deep, shuddering breath, a sudden, wild resolve flashing through his tear-filled eyes. He thought he finally understood what was wrong. He thought you were pulling away because you were tired of waiting in the dark, tired of being hidden, tired of the uncertainty of your future together.
Without breaking eye contact, Jin slowly sank down onto his knees right there.
He held your right hand tightly between both of his, pressing a desperate, kiss to your knuckles before looking up at you from the floor. His broad shoulders shook, his dark eyes pleading with every ounce of soul he had left.
"Marry me, Y/N," Jin whispered, his voice trembling with a frantic, suffocating sincerity. "Marry me. Let me make you my wife."
You stood there frozen, the room tilting on its axis as his words hung suspended in the heavy air between you.
Marry me.
The phrase you had spent three years longing to hear, the words you had dreamed of in quiet, late-night whispers while wrapped in his arms, now landed like a cold, sickening punch to your gut.
Your mind stalled, completely unable to process the sheer audacity of the man kneeling at your feet. How? How could he stand at an his own wedding two weeks ago, slip a band onto another woman's finger in front of his family and the elite world, and now look up at you with tears in his eyes, asking you to be his wife?
What lie was he going to construct this time? Was he planning a fake ceremony? A forged marriage license? A secret, invalid wedding tucked away in some private island where no one could ever verify it? Did he truly believe he could manage two separate lives, two wives, an entire web of deceit, just to keep you from walking out that door?
You stared down at Kim Seokjin.
He was still holding your cold, limp hand tightly against his cheek, his breathing ragged, his dark eyes searching your pale face with a frantic, desperate hope. The powerful CEO was literally on his knees, weeping for your hand, completely oblivious to the fact that the entire illusion had already burned to ash.
What about Jenny? What about his real wife, the woman resting in his family's estate while he begged on the floor of a penthouse he bought for his mistress?
A heavy, suffocating silence stretched between you. You couldn't move. You couldn't pull your hand away. You just stared at him, your mind spiraling into a deep, dark void of disbelief, searching his face for any sign of the man you used to worship, and finding only a master of deception. A liar. A scammer, who scammed three whole years of your love.
Your voice was so quiet, so hollow, it was barely louder than a whisper. Yet each word struck Jin like a violent, physical impact.
"Will it be public?"
Jin’s heart stopped. His grip on your hand tightened instinctively, his dark eyes wide as he stared up at you from the floor.
"Your family... will they finally meet me?" You looked down at him, your eyes completely devoid of the old warmth he depended on, filled instead with a devastating, flat quietness. "Your co-workers? Will... Will we have pictures together?"
The silence that followed was suffocating.
Jin swallowed hard, his throat working against a sudden, violent lump. The frantic, desperate energy that had driven him to his knees evaporated into sheer, icy terror. He had expected tears, joy, hesitation, even anger about how long it had taken, he had expected anything except this.
He didn't answer. He couldn't.
His lips parted, but no sound came out. How could he answer? He couldn't bring you to his family; his father had arranged the union with Jenny's family months ago. He couldn't introduce you to his co-workers; they had all attended the grand wedding reception two weeks prior. He couldn't stand beside you for a single public photo without plunging Kim Enterprises into a catastrophic scandal and destroying the delicate, high-stakes corporate alliance he had just sealed with his ring.
The lie died right there on his tongue, suffocated by the brutal reality of his choices.
You watched the color slowly drain from his handsome face. You watched the frantic hope in his eyes crumble into raw, guilty paralysis. You didn't need him to answer out loud. His silence was the loudest confession he could have ever given you.
Slowly, deliberately, you pulled your hand out of his trembling grip.
He didn't try to stop you this time. His fingers just fell limply to his lap, his shoulders slumping as he remained kneeling on the floor, looking up at you like a man who had just watched his entire world crumble before his eyes.
"I thought so," you murmured softly, taking a single step back into the dark bedroom.
You gently grabbed the edge of the door frame, your hand steady, your posture upright for the first time in weeks.
"Please leave, Jin."
He opened his mouth, a broken, barely audible sound escaping his throat. "Y/N... please..."
"Bring your lawyer tomorrow," you cut him off, your voice quiet, unyielding, and final. "I don't want your money. I don't want the penthouse, the cars, or the gifts. The only thing you were ever proud to give me, the only thing you never hid, was your wealth. Keep it. Write everything back under your name."
You looked at him one last time, seeing the tears finally spilling over his sharp cheekbones, the CEO stripped of everything that ever made him feel untouchable.
"And then," you whispered, "we break up."
Without waiting another second, you closed the door between you, turning the lock with a soft, decisive click that signaled the absolute end of his three-year secret.
~~
Two days bled into one another in total, terrifying silence.
There were no late-night phone calls, no urgent knocks at the door, and no sleek, black Maybach idling quietly in the penthouse garage. Kim Seokjin had vanished. The man who had occupied every corner of your heart, every hour of your days, and every thought in your head for three long years had effectively erased himself from your existence. No lawyer arrived with transfer documents, no courier came to collect his belongings, and no message was sent to signal how, or if he was handling the wreckage left behind.
He was hiding. The powerful, unflappable CEO was retreating into the shadows of his own corporate fortress, unable to face the reality of what he had destroyed.
By the morning of the third day, you realized that if this chapter was going to be closed, you would have to be the one to turn the final page.
You dressed simply in dark jeans and a plain black sweater, pulling your hair back and leaving behind every piece of designer jewelry he had ever bought you. You left the penthouse keys resting neatly on the quartz kitchen island alongside your black card, taking only your small canvas tote bag filled with the few clothes and personal items you had owned before he entered your life.
You took the subway downtown, a sharp, grounding return to the real world and walked into the towering glass skyscraper that housed Kim Enterprises’ chief legal counsel.
The reception desk on the forty-second floor was quiet, smelling faintly of expensive leather and polished wood. When you gave your name to the receptionist, the woman’s polite smile faltered slightly, her eyes widening in subtle recognition before she hurriedly typed into her terminal and picked up the desk phone.
Ten minutes later, you were sitting in a quiet, sunlit conference room opposite Mr. Kang, Seokjin’s senior family attorney.
The older lawyer looked visibly uncomfortable, adjusting his glasses as he sat across from you with a thick leather binder resting unopened between his hands. He knew who you were. He was the man who had drawn up the deeds to the penthouse, the registration for the car, and the legal structures designed to keep you comfortably taken care of while remaining completely invisible to the public eye.
"Miss Y/N," Mr. Kang began, his tone measured and professional, though a faint note of hesitation laced his voice. "Mr. Kim did not instruct me to schedule this meeting. In fact, he explicitly instructed my office yesterday to suspend all actions regarding your assets until further notice."
"It doesn't matter what he instructed," you said quietly, your hands resting calmly in your lap. "The assets are currently legally under my name. Which means I have the authority to surrender them."
Mr. Kang paused, searching your face. He was used to dealing with high-society divorces, corporate greed, and messy financial settlements where people fought over every fraction of a percentage point. Yet here you sat, completely composed, asking for nothing.
"Are you entirely sure?" Mr. Kang asked softly, his sharp legal demeanor softening into something akin to quiet sympathy. "The penthouse alone is worth several million dollars. The funds transferred into your private account were set up as irrevocable gifts. You are under no legal obligation to give any of this back."
"I am sure," you replied, your voice unwavering. "Draft the transfer deeds, Mr. Kang. Transfer the title of the penthouse, the vehicle, and the entire balance of that account back into Kim Seokjin’s name. I want every single document signed and finalized before I leave this office."
The lawyer stared at you for a long moment, seeing the quiet, unbreakable finality in your eyes. He let out a low sigh, nodded slowly, and turned to his computer.
For the next two hours, the only sounds in the room were the hum of the air conditioner, the rhythmic clicking of a keyboard, and the crisp rustle of high-grade paper. Mr. Kang laid out document after document in front of you; property transfers, power of attorney revocations, and asset surrenders.
Page by page, you picked up the pen and signed your name.
With every stroke of black ink on the white paper, you systematically cut every single golden tie that bound you to Kim Seokjin. You severed the financial lifeline he had used to keep you captive in his secret world. You stripped away the luxury, the comfort, and the security, returning yourself to absolute, complete zero.
When the final document was signed, Mr. Kang gathered the papers, aligning them neatly with a soft tap against the mahogany table. He looked up at you, his expression heavy.
"It is done," he said quietly. "As of this moment, everything has been legally restored to Mr. Kim. You owe him nothing, and he retains no legal claim over you."
"Thank you, Mr. Kang," you said, standing up from the leather chair.
"Where will you go?" the attorney asked, unable to stop the personal question from slipping out as he watched you pull your simple canvas bag over your shoulder. "If Mr. Kim asks me... what should I tell him?"
You stopped at the threshold of the office, turning back to look at him one last time. There was no bitterness in your face, no lingering anger, only the clean, quiet freedom of a woman who had finally stepped out of the dark.
"Tell him the penthouse key is on the kitchen island," you murmured softly. "And tell him not to look for me, he have a wife to take care of."
If you like to support my journey please don't hesitate 🍰 Ko-fi.
In the underground underbelly of Seoul’s premier boxing circuit, Jeon Jungkook wasn't just a fighter; he was a predator trapped in a cage of his own making. And when he lost, the cage shattered.
The dressing room door didn’t just open, it practically flew off its hinges, bouncing off the concrete wall with a crack.
You didn't flinch. You had learned exactly twelve months ago that flinching was an invitation for him to press harder. Instead, you kept your eyes trained on the floor, your hands methodically folding his white towel.
"Get out," Jungkook snarled, his voice a rough, breathless rasp. He wasn't talking to you. He was talking to his head coach, and the two PR reps who had foolishly followed him down the corridor trying to handle the fallout of his first major defeat in three years.
"Jungkook, we need to address the media—"
"I said, get the fuck out!"
A heavy, leather gym bag flew across the room, smashing into the water cooler. Water erupted across the floor. The entourage scrambled backward, slamming the door shut behind them.
Then, there was only the sound of his ragged breathing.
Jungkook was huge. The papers called him a heavyweight talented mad dog. His broad shoulders heaved under the sheen of sweat and bruised skin, his knuckles, even wrapped in blood-stained tape, looked lethal.
Slowly, his dark, blown-out pupils drifted through the room until they locked onto you.
"You're still here," he spat, stepping into your space. The heat radiating off him was oppressive.
"I am," you said softly, keeping your tone perfectly level. Monotone. Unbothered. It was the only armor you had.
"Why?" He loomed over you, his shadow swallowing you whole. "You love seeing me like this, don't you? Fucking happy that the great Jeon Jungkook finally hit the canvas."
You didn't answer. You stepped forward, entirely bypassing his glaring gaze, and reached up. Your small, pale hands contrasted sharply against the brutalized canvas of his body as you began to unlace his boxing gloves.
He didn't stop you, but he didn't make it easy either, keeping his forearms tense as iron bars.
This was the dance you had performed for a year. While five previous assistants had quit within their first week, driven out by his temper, his flying fists, and his verbal cruelty, you had stayed. Because to you, this Jungkook wasn't a shock.
You had known him back at school and at university. Back then, before the millions he made and the championship belts, he had been the school’s golden boy bully, and you had been his favorite target. He used to knock your books out of your hands just to watch you scramble on the floor. Now, he threw gym bags and water coolers.
The stage had changed, the years had passed, but the monster remained exactly the same. And ironically, knowing the worst of him from before was exactly why you were the only one who could survive him currently.
"Eat," you murmured, nodding toward the meal prep container sitting on the bench. "Steak, sweet potatoes, greens. I prepared it three hours ago."
Jungkook let out a dark, mocking laugh, the sound scraping against his throat. With a brutal swipe of his wrapped hand, he sent the container flying. The grilled steak and vegetables scattered across the dirty floor, mixing with the spilled water.
"I don't want your fucking food," he growled, stepping closer until his chest almost brushed your nose. "I just lost a split decision to a nobody, Y/N. My career is crumbling right now, and you're handing me a Tupperware container?"
You looked down at the ruined food, then back up into his eyes. There was a raw, dangerous flash of darkness in his gaze, the same look he used to give you in the high school hallways before making your life hell. He wanted a reaction. He starved for you to scream, to cry, to give him a reason to shatter the rest of the room.
"I will clean it up," you said, your voice entirely devoid of emotion. "And then I will prepare another one. Because tomorrow at 5:00 AM, you have roadwork. And if your body lacks glycogen, you will lag. And if you lag, you will lose again."
The word lose struck him like a physical blow.
Jungkook’s jaw clenched so hard a vein throbbed in his temple. He grabbed your upper arm, his grip rough that would undoubtedly leave bruises on your skin by morning. He pulled you flush against him, forcing you to look up at his face, a cut above his eyebrow was leaking a slow trail of blood down his cheek.
"You think you're so smart," he whispered, his breath hot against your lips. "You think because you knew me when I was a kid, you can predict me? You’re just a maid, Y/N. A glorified servant I hired because nobody else could stomach the sight of me."
"I am," you agreed, refusing to let your voice show the deep rooted fear you have towards him. "I am exactly what you pay me to be. Now, let me get the ice."
For a long, agonizing moment, he didn't move. The tension in the room was a living, breathing entity, thick with a year's worth of unspoken history and dark, twisted codependency. He hated that he needed you. He hated that you were the only person in his entire empire who didn't look at him with fear or greed—just a cold, unyielding perception.
Slowly, his grip loosened. Not out of kindness, but out of a sudden, exhausted defeat.
He sat onto the leather bench, burying his face in his wrapped hands. The great, terrifying Jeon Jungkook looked small for a fraction of a second, swallowed by the silence of the locker room.
You didn't offer words of comfort. You didn't tell him he did his best. You knew him too well for that. Instead, you grabbed a fresh cloth, wet it with ice water, and stepped between his heavy thighs.
Gently, firmly, you pressed the cloth to the bleeding cut on his eyebrow.
Jungkook flinched, his eyes snapping open, burning into yours. But he didn't pull away. He sat perfectly still, letting you clean the blood from his skin, his massive hands resting heavily on his knees, gripping the fabric of his shorts until his knuckles turned white.
He let out a long, ragged exhale, his eyes tracking the movement of your lips before shifting back to your unreadable eyes. "You really hate me, don't you?"
You pulled the cloth away, throwing it into the laundry bin with a dull thud. You grabbed his gym bag and slung it over your shoulder.
"I don't have the luxury of hating you, Jungkook," you said, looking back at him over your shoulder. "I'm on the clock."
The rhythmic, bone-deep thud-thud-thud of leather tearing into the sandbag had been the sole soundtrack to your night.
It was 4:15 AM. Jungkook's private gym was illuminated only by the harsh, buzzing fluorescent tubes directly above the boxing ring. The air was thick, hot, and smelled heavily of sweat, iron, and a desperate, toxic pride.
He hadn't slept. You knew this because you hadn't slept either. You had spent the last six hours in the adjacent breakroom, monitoring his vitals via the smart-tracker synced to your tablet. You watched his heart rate spike into dangerous, red-lined zones hours ago, staying there like a flatline of pure fury.
Now, you stood at the edge of the mat. In your hands, you held a fresh gallon of electrolyte water and a cold compress.
Jungkook was a vision of raw, unchecked self-destruction. His shirt was long gone, discarded somewhere in the dark corners of the room. His massive back, mapped with thick, dense muscles that was slick with a layer of sweat. He was throwing combinations at the heavy leather sandbag—brutal, terrifying shots that echoed through the empty facility like gunfire.
"You should take a rest," you said. Your voice was flat, cutting through the heavy, rhythmic violence of the gym.
He didn't even acknowledged you. A sharp punch rattled the heavy steel chains anchoring the bag to the ceiling. Crack.
"Jungkook—"
"Shut the fuck up!" he growled, his voice a gravelly bark. He didn't break his rhythm. He threw a devastating right cross, the sheer velocity of the impact violently distorting the shape of the dense sandbag. He was punching with enough force to shatter his own bones, completely disregarding the fact that his hands had been wrapped for nearly twelve hours straight.
You took a deliberate step forward, standing between him and the sandbag.
"You pay me to ensure you have exactly what it takes to win," you said, looking him dead in his bloodshot eyes. "I am doing the job I am paid for. You need to do a lot of things if you want that belt back, Jungkook. And it starts with resting."
Jungkook’s chest heaved, his ribs expanding violently as he fought for oxygen. The sheer size of him was overwhelming up close; dense, unyielding muscle locked and right now, every single inch of him was vibrating with a dangerous warning, he didn't mind punching you.
"I pay you to follow my fucking orders," he snarled. "Don't forget your fucking place."
Before you could draw a breath, his wrapped hand shot out, grabbing you by the collar of your shirt. His damp, sweat-soaked hair fell over his eyes, casting his face in shadow, making him look less like a man and more like a monster, a real mad dog, an effect only amplified by the staggering size difference between you.
You didn't flinch. You looked straight through the curtain of his hair, into his dark, burning eyes.
"You used to be aggressive back in school because it was the only way you knew how to grab attention," you said, your voice steady, hitting him with the precise weapon of your shared history. "And now you're doing it again. You're rough, you're aggressive, pushing your body to the edge because you're terrified that no one will ever look at you if it wasn't for your wins."
Jungkook growled, a low, animalistic sound tearing from his throat. With terrifying ease, he lifted you off the floor by your collar, driving you backward until your spine hit the concrete wall. Your toes barely scraped the floor.
"What did you just say?" His voice was laced with a cocktail of self-hatred, the agony of defeat, exhaustion, and above all, pure spite that the quiet, weak girl he used to bully was the one stripping him naked to his core.
"You heard me—"
BOOM.
His free fist slammed into the concrete right beside your head, the shockwave vibrating through the wall and into your skull. He didn't let go of your collar. Instead, the hand he had just cracked against the wall shifted, his large, taped fingers gripping your jaw tightly, forcing your face up.
"Don't act so strong," he whispered, his hot, ragged breath wiping across your skin, "when we both know how fucking pathetic you are."
"I know exactly how pathetic I am, Jungkook," you retorted, refusing to let the trembling in your bones reach your voice. You reached up, your small hands wrapping around the thick wrist holding your jaw. "I live with it. I face it every day, and that's why I'm stronger than you. You can't even face a single loss. Please..."
He clenched his jaw, his thumb pressing dangerously hard into your cheekbone.
"I hate you," you whispered, looking past the beast to the boy who used to ruin your childhood. "But I hate seeing you lose this pathetically even more. So let me do my job. Let the coach do his. Allow your body to actually get ready to win. Because your loss last night wasn't because of weakness. No you are pure muscle Jungkook, a real mad dog. But... your ego was just too high to notice the hit coming."
For a long, agonizing second, the gym fell completely silent. The only sound was the erratic, heavy thudding of his heart beneath his ribs. You could feel the raw tremor in his grip—not from weakness, but from the sheer, exhausting effort it took to keep himself from breaking you. He wanted to break something. He wanted to break you. But the absolute truth in your words had pierced through him.
Slowly, his hand slipped from your collar, and your feet hit the solid ground again.
He didn't walk away. He lowered his forehead until it rested against your shoulder, his massive, sweating body slumped against yours, letting his dead weight lean into you. It was an incredibly heavy, stifling embrace, born out of pure exhaustion and a toxic, twisted dependency he would never admit to.
"If I lose the rematch," Jungkook muttered, his voice muffled against the fabric of your shirt, dark and lethal, "I'll tear this whole place down. And I'll start with you."
"You won't lose," you said softly, your hands remaining on his wrists, feeling the heavy, steady pulse of the predator finally calming down.
a note from angel: im sorry i need to stop making new series this is an addiction of mine that i can't stop, pls sukuna leave me alone, i feel like im making a multiverse of sukunas.
synopsis: trying a new coffee shop didn't end up going your way when a mean barista takes your order. the problem? he's rude as fuck but he's the best at making your drinks. when you end up giving him a taste of his own medicine, you end up in a deal where this grumpy barista finds himself in the habit of making your morning coffee. everyday. for the next seven days.
tags: enemies to lovers, modern au, barista!sukuna, fluff, crack
word count: 3.7k words
Coffee is part of your daily routine.
If you don't start your day with coffee then it can be ensured that the day will be a terrible day.
You're not strict about your coffee, you don't simply stick to one type of drink. You're the type to explore and try new things. From lattes, to espressos, to cappuccinos, matcha, chai tea, hojicha and a lot more. The convenience of living in a big city is that there will always be a bunch of cafes and coffee shops to try with new businesses opening all over the blocks.
You've made it your own personal mission to try as many new shops in the city, not limiting yourself to one place. You want to support as much of the local businesses as possible, staying away from the big corporate brands. You have enough dealing with business and corporate issues in your work life so the least you can do is support your local community in your personal free time.
On your scout to work you happen to come across a new coffee shop. It's slightly hidden on the block but the brand name and minimalist colours catch your eye.
'Fuga.'
You're interested immediately. Coming to a stop outside, the meaning of the shop name is printed in white on the window. 'Fuga — One of the Japanese meanings of this is 'a way of elegance or grace'. We hope to include fuga with every order that we take; there's no rush, just sit back and enjoy.'
The opening and closing times are also unusual. They're open in time for the usual morning rush hour but unlike other coffee stores, they stay open until 9pm. You can't imagine the shifts that their staff must take and how much happens behind the scenes.
Despite being hidden, it is the morning rush hour on a weekday and through the window you can clearly see that there is a queue forming. Underrated coffee shops get discovered pretty quickly these days thanks to social media and it's not long until they'll be announcing a sister location somewhere else in the city.
Stepping inside, a bell chimes overhead but it's drowned out due to the hustle and bustle inside the shop. The scent of crushed coffee beans hits you immediately and the sound of lofi music playing in the background is just about heard over the level of conversations in the store.
Joining the queue, your eyes scan the cafe. It's pretty spacey compared to the other units that most coffee shops rent out. There's clearly more places to sit in the back and all of the window seats are currently taken. There's a handful of students and people in suits either sat working away on their laptops or taking a call. In the corner an old man is sitting back and enjoying a cup of his own hot coffee.
There's three people currently manning the counter and you worry whether that means service is slow but on further observation you notice they work well, weaving in and out of each other. There's a man situated at the till, tall and large you first notice. Then you see that he has pink hair and it's only when you inch closer to being served that you notice he has an array of black tattoos. They're printed on his face as well as around his wrists and you start to wonder how many baristas you've seen with face tattoos.
He seems to be the first.
Behind him seems to be a white haired figure with a plum pink stripe dyed into their hair. It's clear that whoever employs these people are very laid back with how they are presented. The figure moves quickly but also with caution pouring and making drinks before bringing them to the collection section and calling out a name.
You've been so caught up in studying the new environment of the cafe that you don't even realise that it's your turn next. You haven't had the chance to look at the menu so when you finally do, you're left with your mouth open in front of the tattooed man. And on closer observation you find that he's rather intimidating.
"Good morning." you greet.
"What do you want?" he asks in a monotone tone evident that he's been repeating this question for a while. You brush off the fact that he hasn't greeted you back and you simply hum as you stare at the menu.
It's evident that you're irritating the barista by not even knowing what you want, the bored expression on his face and his finger impatiently tapping the counter. Your eyes are scanning the menu until he finally says something that in all of your years of going to local cafes have never heard in your life.
"Can you hurry up?"
"Excuse me?"
"I said," he draws as if it's painfully inconveniencing him to repeat himself, "can you hurry up? There's a queue behind you." It's evident in his tone that he's not asking but rather ordering you to do so and for a split second there's a moment in which you forget that you are in fact the customer.
"I'm aware." you say, "I'm deciding."
"You had two minutes to decide." he retorts.
"I've never been here before, of course I'm going to take my time looking at the menu." you keep a calm tone making it clear that you don't want any misunderstandings.
"Do you want a medal? What's your order?"
Fine. You think to yourself, you're gonna give him the benefit of the doubt.
Maybe it's been a long morning, maybe he wasn't supposed to be on shift today but then got called in, maybe he's just an asshole. You don't care. But what you do care about is getting your morning coffee as usual.
"Vanilla latte with oat milk please."
"We're out of oat milk." he announces keeping his tone flat with enough space to add some frustration into it as if this was your own fault.
"Really?"
He doesn't reply, keeping a blank face that silently asks 'do I look like I'm joking?'
"Uhhh, could I get an iced strawberry matcha then please?"
"We're out."
You hold back a sigh, forcing a tight lipped smile on your face. "Fine. A cappuccino. Any milk you have. Please."
The barista doesn't look up, tapping onto a screen. "Regular or large?"
"What's the difference?" you ask.
He points to the side where the size cup differences are shown and as usual the large is 50p extra.
"Regular."
"Name?"
After giving your name, he mutters something under his breath and if you were in a bad mood this morning then you would have asked him what his issue was but instead you keep quiet, silently wishing he spills lukewarm coffee all over his disgustingly attractive face. Somehow. If it was logical to spill coffee on one's face.
"Four fifty. Tap your card and stand over there." he orders without any patience.
You don't even think twice before tapping your phone and moving immediately. In your mind you continue to curse him forever whilst watching his back muscles move swiftly as he makes your drink. Him and the white haired figure switched places with him making your order and his co-worker now at the till.
You expected a long wait but it takes less than five minutes before he's yelling out your name with impatience.
And he pronounced it wrong.
Whether it was on purpose or he wasn't listening to you at all, you'll never know but you go ahead and take your order. You can't even say thank you directly before he's rushing off and completing another order. Deciding to get out as soon as possible, you grab as many sugar packets you need, a stirrer and you head on out.
"How fucking rude." you mutter to yourself, opening the lid to your cappuccino. There's no latte art and you wouldn't expect there to be given the rush. You pour your sugar in and stir until satisfied, slowly making your way to the office building.
Sure, you know baristas are sometimes not the most welcoming people given the high stress level of their jobs and you've come across some reclusive baristas before but this one…he's just plain rude. You don't usually complain about how people do their job but this one has really struck a nerve.
How was he hired in the first place? Does the manager know he speaks to customers like this? How did he even pass an interview to get hired for this place? Does he act like this with all his customers?
Those are the questions that you continue to ask yourself whilst on the way to work, you get a little distracted after taking a sip of your coffee and coming to find out that your cappuccino is actually pretty good. Usually some cafes don't do cappuccinos the right way but there's something about this cup that makes you wonder what exact type of coffee bean they use.
You make a mental note to check later in your free time and it's not long before you start to feel rejuvenated by your coffee. Despite your bad customer service, you still manage to get a good cup of coffee to support your day and it's almost enough to forget your bad interaction.
***
Almost.
That cup of coffee was good.
Good enough to make you check their company website and check their 'about us' page.
And of course it just so happens that you stumble onto their google reviews.
Fuga Coffee Shop | reviews (54)
Naturally, your laptop cursor clicks onto their reviews. They only opened two months ago so it's understandable why the reviews must be so low, they're just starting out. The reviews are automatically filtered to their top reviews, which is from just over two weeks ago.
ihatemonkeys009
The grumpy tattooed barista is a little anti-social but he makes the best lattes ever! will be coming back again! four stars.
"A little?" you say aloud to yourself, "give me a break."
The review that follows under that is also highly popular.
ghostsarerealiswear2334_67
free wifi and they open early and don't close till late?! best study place ever! (please like my review!) five stars.
kentoforwork89
A nice and newly established restaurant under the Japanese name 'Fuga', the name is fitting for its elegant service and high quality coffee. They have a wide range on the menu and serve food too. The cafe is spacious, plenty of space to study or work and if you use electronics they have power sockets dotted around. Good prices for the service and highly reliable. I will be coming here again as it is not overwhelmingly busy or loud like some other places. I highly recommend. four and a half stars.
ilovesweetssooooooooooomuchhhgojo9838
tHE tattooed barisSta maybe be cold hoever his coffees are the warmest!!!!! xoxoxoxo peefect date location (soz for typos idid this fast on my phone so i coulget fre emochi) FIVE STARTS
You let out a sigh reading the reviews, it's a little cheesy but you get the point. Reading all 54 reviews you've come to find that a lot of people find the same tattooed barista annoying but miraculously all is forgotten once you've tried a coffee from him.
There isn't one totally bad review — maybe from an AI bot who says that the location is in a whole other city but other than that it's clear that this cafe is a new and upcoming contender as one of the best spots in the city.
And that doesn't sit right in your soul.
Taking this personally as someone who runs a company, you understand that if people were talking about your employees in this manner then they would be subject to being fired. You're confused on how this man is still employed even after fifty reviews, surely the owner must be reading them.
You sit in silence for a while as you contemplate.
Should you?
Or shouldn't you?
Hesitant, your fingers hover over your keyboard, testing out a sentence.
i tried this cafe as a new customer — no, no, too cliche, you backspace your sentence entirely.
Thinking for a moment, you reflect on what you want to say. You start typing slowly before it all flows within your fingertips, a mini paragraph forming on your screen. You're writing in the heat of the moment, out of pure frustration and embarrassment. Most people would be able to forgive and forget but well…unfortunately you're not most people.
anonymouscapybara45
this place is relatively new in this city and as a coffee lover i was extremely enthusiastic to try this place out. my high hopes for this cafe were quickly crushed once i was (not even greeted) but completely mistreated by the tattooed barista.
i did not like this service, no matter how good the quality of the coffee was.
i do not think a barista should be talking to customers like this. i felt severely unwelcomed and i am having second thoughts on returning to this place.
there's better and kinder staff in other cafes in the city who i will gladly give my money too.
1 out of 5 stars.
Sure, it's a little…Karen but you feel petty. Highlighting all the adverbs makes you think that your english teacher from high school would be proud. There's a small feeling of guilt in the pit of your stomach as it dawns on you that your review will be the first one star review the company has ever had.
But this is not a baseless review. You actually felt this way at the time. It's a little exaggerated but who cares, they don't know you and they never will because you're not stepping foot there ever again.
There's not much satisfaction in the world that you can get other than pressing post on your review.
***
An hour later you've moved on with your life. You've settled into your home, following your post-work routine and you're now sitting on your couch. Your phone lights up with a notification and your eyes land on the screen.
You get a notification from your gmail that someone has mentioned you in a reply and with your thumb clicking on the message your eyes slightly widen.
The owner has replied to your message.
And for the first time it seems because they haven't seemed to reply to all the other positive messages on the site.
You'd forgotten that this was an option for them, simply thinking that your review would just get the employee removed. Your eyes skim over the reply.
From the Owner of Fuga in reply to anonymouscapybara45
Hello valued customer,
we apologise that you have had this experience recently, it is never our intention to make our customers feel this way. Our company and brand relies majorly on the respect and communication with our customers which is always taught and trained to our employees. We apologise for the actions and behaviour of our barista and on behalf of the company we would like to invite you to have any item on our menu free of charge over the course of the week. We would like to give you a seven day voucher and invite you back to a better atmosphere of our cafe to show you truly how we treat our customers.
Please pop into our cafe at your convenience. We look forward to seeing you and we apologise again for your experience.
Kind regards,
Fuga Owner (Jin Itadori)
Your mind is baffled.
Free drinks…for a week? Because of your bad review?
Not even the other low starred reviews have had this level of response from the owner. You're the first one star review they've had and they haven't even responded maliciously. You can't pass up on this good of an opportunity to have free coffee for the next week? You could be saving a ridiculous amount of money.
You re-read the review a few times to make sure that it still seems real to your eyes.
Maybe it will be the last time that you'll see that barista again.
**
You try your luck the following day. You're a bit more hopeful walking into the coffee shop the next day. It's a little less busier than the previous day and the queue is a little shorter.
But most important of them all, you don't see that tattooed jerk around.
This time serving the till is the white haired figure you saw making the drinks the last time you arrived. Behind them works another person that you haven't seen before who has their back turned making orders.
Soon enough it's your turn to go up to the till.
"Hello." They greet and almost immediately you feel comfortable that you won't be shunned for simply being a customer at this cafe.
"Good morning," you greet back with a smile before explaining your situation. "This may be a bit awkward but uhm, I was the customer who wrote a review of this cafe and uh— the owner said I was given a voucher as some sort of compensation."
For a second you thought you were scammed or that the entire thing was a lie just to catch the poor customer who's written terrible reviews but you watch as the wave of recognition hits the barista.
Instead they nod and say, "one moment" before turning around to head to the back. You shift from one foot to the other, patiently waiting and in the meantime thinking of what you'd want to get as your first free drink.
Your smile soon drops once you see the figure that follows the person that you were speaking to at the till.
That tattooed bastard.
His eyes widen slightly at the sight of you before turning into a miserable frown, clearly he wasn't expecting you to be the customer who wrote the review but there's also something that tells you that he's not totally surprised.
The white haired barista makes their way back to you, "If you go over to Sukuna he can help you with your voucher."
Sukuna. Now you know his name. And now you know he's somehow still employed by this damn coffee shop.
You walk over with hesitation and you can't help but notice Sukuna's eyes watching you as you make your over to a quiet area.
"It was you." he says but there's no bite to his tone. It's merely a statement he's making but you don't miss the judgement in his eyes.
"I was being honest." you shrug, holding your head high. You have no regrets whatsoever, you were merely giving constructive feedback about an environment that felt hostile to you. About a certain someone who was hostile.
Sukuna leans in a little closer to you, one hand placed on the counter as he speaks to you. "Because of you and your stupid review I have to serve you free drinks for a week, which is coming out of my pay by the way."
"Maybe it'll teach you how to speak nicer to customers." you retort back.
You notice his hand turning into a tight fist, gripping the counter, clearly holding back on responding to you. With his other hand he slides over a piece of paper. "Here's your damn voucher and, no I didn't write it, so what do you want?"
You tilt your head a little at him.
Sukuna corrects himself and in a deadpan monotone he starts over. "Hello. Welcome to Fuga. What would you like today?"
A satisfied smile reaches your lips. "Much better. I would like an iced strawberry matcha with oat milk please."
"Regular or large?"
"Hmm since it's on the house, large please."
"It's not on the house…" he mutters.
"What was that?"
"Nothing."
"Hmmmmm."
Sukuna disappears, diving into the hustle and bustle of his other colleagues making your own personal drink. As he makes your drink you look over your voucher, Sukuna's written today's date already and the expiry date is set seven days from now.
Once again, your order doesn't take him long and you spot your green and pink drink in his large hands. Approaching he hands your drink over to you which you thank before taking a sip.
On your tongue, the grassy flavour is immediately sedated by the sweetness of the strawberry at the bottom. There's the perfect amount of ice and matcha in your drink for you to enjoy and it takes everything in you not to fall to your knees and praise Sukuna on how great he's made this drink.
"Not bad." you murmur, downplaying your enthusiasm. "Can I get another free drink?"
"One per day stupid."
"The voucher doesn't clarify that, it's handwritten."
"I don't care."
"Would you like me to write another poor review?"
Now this is what gets Sukuna clenching his jaw together. He takes a pause, calming himself down before speaking to you again. "No anonymouscapybara45 I wouldn't like that because you got me in a lot of shit for this."
You don't flinch when he mentions your username. Ah, so he's read the review then. You quip back, "Your boss fire you yet?"
"No," and there's a slight pout, "he's just annoying the shit out of me at the moment."
"Hmm right, if you make me an iced vanilla latte with oat milk to go I think I might just refrain from writing a bad review about you for today."
You watch as he clenches his jaw in frustration. "Just this once. For the rest of the days you get one drink only."
"And a sweet treat!" you chime in.
Sukuna pauses, mulling over your suggestion. He lets out a sigh.
"A free drink and a snack." He offers.
"Deal." You outstretch your free hand to shake on.
Sukuna looks at your hand in pure disgust like you've just offered to spit in his mouth. "Deal. Just don't make my job harder than it needs to be." he mutters.
"I don't think I can promise that." you reply and you watch in pure satisfaction as he walks away mumbling to himself.
thank you for reading!! i hope you enjoyed :) i won't be running a taglist for this mini series (pls it is mini) but ya comments and reblogs are appreciated!!
You accidentally knock on your brother Toji's neighbor's door instead of his. Unfortunately for you, his neighbor happens to be Sukuna.
Warm autumn air drifts lazily across the cracked parking lot, pushing brittle leaves over the worn asphalt. The car finally slows to a stop, the engine cutting off in front of the old red-brick fraternity house.
You climb out, the crisp fall air brushing pleasantly against your skin. Out of habit, you adjust the leather strap of your bag on your shoulder, but it does nothing to ease the tension sitting in your chest.
You won't even be starting college until next year.
The trunk slams open behind you with a dull thud.
Your dad, grumbling under his breath like always, starts unloading boxes while your mom immediately begins counting the endless bags of homemade food they brought for Toji. Of course they couldn't show up empty-handed. Your brother's always had a ridiculous appetite after spending hours at the gym.
"Go get your brother," your mom says without even looking up. "Tell him to help your father."
"Mhm..."
Your answer comes out quiet, almost absentminded. You give a lazy nod before heading toward the fraternity house.
You think Toji's room is on the second floor...
Or was it the first?
The last time you were here, you'd been too caught up in your own thoughts to pay attention to where you were going. By the time you reach the porch, you realize you've completely forgotten the layout.
Thankfully, the heavy oak front door is closed.
You reach out and press the old brass doorbell.
Nothing.
For what feels like forever.
Nearly a full minute passes before slow, dragging footsteps finally echo from somewhere inside.
A heavy lock clicks.
The door swings open.
A guy stands in front of you.
He's ridiculously tall.
Maybe even taller than Toji.
Messy snow-white hair sticks out in every direction like he'd just rolled out of bed. He lets out a huge yawn, lazily rubbing the back of his neck before squinting against the bright afternoon sun.
Only then does he finally look at you.
His eyes—an impossibly vivid shade of blue—study you with open curiosity.
For a few seconds, he just... stares.
Then the corners of his lips curl into an easy, welcoming smile.
"Well, hey there."
His voice catches you off guard.
Deep.
Smooth.
Relaxed in a way that sounds almost effortlessly confident.
You suddenly forget how to speak under that unwavering gaze.
"Uh... hi."
Your voice wavers.
"I'm... Toji's little sister."
You clear your throat.
"My parents are here. I just came to grab him so he can help unload everything."
The blond lifts an eyebrow.
Something playful flickers in those bright blue eyes.
"Sister?"
His tone makes it sound less like a question and more like he's trying to figure out whether you're messing with him.
"Yeah."
He watches you for another second before his smile widens, faint dimples appearing in his cheeks.
Just like that, every trace of sleepiness disappears from his face.
"Satoru."
He gives you a small, polite nod.
"Nice to meet you."
"You too."
Satoru steps aside in one smooth motion, letting you into the cool, dim entrance hall.
"Second floor. End of the hallway, then take a right."
"Thanks."
You nod quickly before hurrying past him, trying very hard not to hold your breath—or look around too much.
You're already halfway up the old wooden staircase when a quiet chuckle reaches your ears from behind.
Heat immediately creeps up your neck.
The hallway upstairs is silent.
You walk all the way to the end where it splits in two.
Two doors.
Facing each other.
You quickly replay Satoru's directions in your head.
Right.
So...
This one.
You knock on the painted wood.
Nothing.
You wait, shifting awkwardly from one foot to the other.
A cold knot of anxiety slowly spreads through your chest.
You knock again.
Harder.
Still nothing.
Frowning now—and already annoyed at your brother, who's probably dead asleep—you raise your fist one more time.
This time, much louder.
The door suddenly flies open.
Your fist jerks forward into empty air.
You flinch so hard your heart nearly jumps into your throat.
Instead of a face...
You find yourself staring directly at a broad, bare chest.
It isn't Toji.
The man standing in front of you is built just as solidly—broad shoulders, thick frame, the kind of body that clearly belongs to someone used to hard training. His chest and stomach are completely bare, muscles shifting beneath his skin with even the smallest movement.
But that's not what steals your attention.
It's the tattoos.
Black markings wrap tightly around his forearms before climbing over his shoulders, stretching across the sides of his ribs and branching down his abdomen in thin, jagged lines. You even catch a few smaller markings circling his biceps.
Then your eyes drift to his face.
The same black lines run beneath his eyes and across his cheekbones, making his already sharp features look even harsher.
His hair is an unusual shade of soft peach, still slightly damp like he'd just gotten out of the shower. One loose strand hangs over his forehead, almost covering his right eye.
A desk lamp glows somewhere behind him, spilling warm amber light over one side of his body while the other remains swallowed by shadow.
He's frowning.
You can practically feel his gaze travel slowly over you, sizing you up without a hint of shame.
Slowly, he tilts his head.
There's something animalistic about the movement.
Predatory.
"A...?"
The confused sound slips out before you can stop it.
He doesn't answer right away.
His brows knit together slightly, and his expression shifts into something openly skeptical—bordering on amused.
Then he grimaces, as if the sound of your voice alone is enough to irritate him.
"...Who are you?"
You open your mouth.
Nothing comes out.
Heat rushes into your face, down your neck, even across your chest until your skin prickles with embarrassment.
"I... I'm sorry..."
Your words stumble over each other.
"I was looking for Toji."
Your voice comes out painfully small.
Silence.
His expression only grows flatter.
Bored.
His face practically says, Here we go again.
Apparently, girls using that excuse isn't exactly new to him.
You rush to explain before he can misunderstand any further.
"I'm his sister."
A faint smirk finally appears.
It never reaches his eyes.
He straightens up before casually leaning one shoulder against the doorframe, folding his arms across his chest. The movement pulls at the tattoos stretched over his muscles.
Without saying a word, he lifts one hand and points behind you.
"Toji's room is the one across the hall."
He gives a lazy nod toward the door behind your back.
Even as you turn away, the weight of his attention doesn't leave you.
He doesn't look away for even a second.
You glance over your shoulder—
—and only now notice the faded nameplate hanging on the opposite door.
Oh.
You really did get the rooms mixed up.
"Oh my God..."
You squeeze your eyes shut for a second, wishing the floor would just open up and swallow you whole.
"Thank you."
You practically flee to the correct door, putting as much distance between yourself and him as possible before knocking several times in quick succession.
Even then...
You know he hasn't moved.
His gaze still burns between your shoulder blades, making goosebumps rise across your skin.
A few seconds later, the door opens.
Toji stands there, squinting through sleep-heavy eyes as he rubs at them with one hand.
Then he recognizes you.
"Shorty?"
"Toji!"
The second you hear his voice, all the tension leaves your body.
You throw yourself into his arms, burying your face against his chest.
Still half-asleep, he pats your back automatically.
"Mom and Dad are here."
Your words tumble out in one breath.
"Dad needs help unloading everything. They brought, like... a ridiculous amount of stuff."
"They're already here?"
He drags a hand down his face, trying to wake himself up.
"It's barely fucking nine in the morning..."
You shrug.
Only after he speaks does Toji notice where your uneasy gaze is fixed.
Behind you, still leaning lazily against his own doorway, stands his neighbor.
Toji's expression changes instantly.
Every trace of sleep disappears, replaced by quiet irritation.
His whole body tenses.
"Sukuna."
His voice turns sharp.
"The fuck are you staring at?"
The stranger lets out a low chuckle.
His voice is deep, rough around the edges, but just as rich as Satoru's had been downstairs—
—but unlike Satoru's, there's something dangerous beneath it.
Something aggressive.
Sukuna.
You quietly memorize the name.
"Your kid sister decided she'd stop by my room first."
Toji shoots you a questioning look.
You shrink a little, still hiding against his shoulder.
"I... mixed up the doors..."
Your voice is barely above a whisper.
Toji clicks his tongue in annoyance, his jaw tightening.
He steps out into the hallway, stuffing his hands into his sweatpants pockets before gently nudging you forward.
"You guys heading back tonight?" he asks, never taking his eyes off Sukuna.
"Yeah."
You nod.
"We're leaving later."
"Shame."
That lazy, velvety voice comes from behind you, sending your pulse climbing all over again.
You glance back.
Sukuna hasn't moved.
His arms are still crossed over his chest, every inch of those black tattoos on display.
That crooked smirk is still playing on his lips.
"Aren't you staying for the party tonight?"
Toji rolls his eyes so hard you can almost hear it.
His jaw flexes.
"Shut up," he throws over his shoulder.
"She's not going."
"Why not?"
Sukuna sounds almost amused.
"'Cause she's still too young."
The words sting far more than his attempt to protect you.
"Excuse me? I'm not! I'm already—"
You take a step forward, ready to argue—
—but Toji doesn't even acknowledge your protest.
Instead, he reaches over and plants a heavy hand on top of your head, giving it a firm squeeze.
"And don't even think about checking out my friends."
His tone is serious.
Almost warning you.
"I wasn't going to!"
You grumble, brushing your hair back into place after he ruffles it.
You're about to argue some more.
But your eyes meet Sukuna's.
He's still standing in his doorway.
Still looking at you.
Not Toji.
Not the hallway.
Not anything else.
Just...
You.
The smirk on his lips slowly spreads into something far more self-satisfied.
You don't know how long the moment lasts.
Long enough to make your pulse forget how to behave.
Maybe forever.
Then—
Thwack.
Toji smacks the back of your head.
You let out a tiny yelp, immediately dropping your gaze to the toes of your sneakers, pretending they're suddenly the most fascinating thing in the world while trying desperately to calm the frantic pounding of your heart.
Do not repost, copy, plagiarize, translate, or feed my work into AI in any form!)
Thanks for reading! ♡ Just a little drabble. I'm still a bit unsure about this one, but I hope some of you enjoyed it anyway.
ა ˙˖ summary → there’s no one you hate more than satoru gojo. he’s arrogant and entirely too full of himself. when you agree to be strictly enemies with benefits, gojo takes this as the perfect opportunity to finally make you his.
ა ˙˖ content: 12.3k wc, accurate portrayal of fraternities so the boys are jerks srry, hazing, rough sex, spit play, overstimulation, spanking, choking, desperate gojo, you really hate him so not much fluff this chapter! probably more I can't name rn. it's a lot.
frat!jo 𝓍 fem!reader
When you first got your acceptance letter to your dream school three years ago, you never thought it would end up with you in this position. The side of your face pressed into the cold wooden desk by the hand of your enemy, your shorts and panties dropped to your ankles, his cock slamming into you so hard that your research papers and pens go flying to the library floor.
The sound of the legs creaking fill the study room room, his pace ruthless, long fingers digging into your cheek to keep you down as you bit your lip to stop yourself from crying out his name and begging him to go harder.
One might wonder how you, the notorious frat hater, ended up letting a playboy like Gojo Satoru get into your pants not once, not twice, but eight times in the last two weeks after swearing he was your number one enemy.
It all started the first day of uni when you let your roommate Shoko convince you into going to a sorority party after a long day of classes and reading syllabuses.
You had been minding your own business, laying on your too small bed with your headphones blaring music as you scrolled through Instagram and pretended like your mom hadn’t been trying to call you for the past twenty minutes.
She was probably calling to check in since she thought you were just getting out of practice, given that you lied about making the gymnastics team to get her off your back. You never even signed up, never had interest in it but had been forced into it as a child. Your mother always told you that one day you’d make it to the olympics and while you were good at it, you had no plans on doing such a thing.
So when her name pops up again, you hit the red button and put your phone on dnd. It was nine, you would just tell her you were asleep.
When you went to play your music again, your roommate walks in and immediately locks eyes with you, a grin spreading on her face that has you squinting suspiciously.
You really liked Shoko. You officially met two weeks ago when you were finally allowed to start moving your stuff in and you had both bonded surprisingly quick over the short period of time, spending almost every day together exploring the campus and surrounding city. Which means you were starting to differentiate between her smiles and the one she wore now told you she wanted to ask you something.
“Thank god you’re still up!” She practically skips into the room, slamming the door shut behind her.
You sigh and sit up, removing an earbud. You pull your rising shorts down and cross your arms with a raised brow. She moved to stand in front of your bed, biting her bottom lip and failing to contain her excitement.
“Spit it out already.”
“There’s a sorority party in an hour and I got invited which means by extension you’re invited and puhleasee, don’t make me go by myself!”
You tried everything to get out of going, from feigning illness to lying that you had to be up early tomorrow for class even though you both basically had the same schedule and your morning was lecture free.
You weren’t a boring person, you partied a lot in high school but this was college and even though you had no clue what you wanted to major in yet, this was where you truly needed to lock in and focus on getting good grades.
Unfortunately for you, Shoko wasn’t having any of it. For every excuse you came up with, she had an argument against it. You don’t wanna be hungover? Fine, just don’t drink! You’re tired? You’re only nineteen, you can rest when you’re dead!
“When your kids ask what you were like in college, are you gonna tell them that you were a loser who sat in her dorm all day or that you were young, hot, and knew how to have fun?”
She had a point. It was just one party, what harm was there in enjoying yourself for a night? If you didn’t like it, you would simply leave. Plus it was at a sorority. You could manage that, though you couldn’t say the same for frats.
You’d die before being caught in one of those.
Fraternities were the embodiment of hell, nothing good ever happened at any of them based on the horror stories your older sister told you while helping you pack for uni. Sweaty, packed rooms, obnoxious men that only wanted to get in your pants, stale beer and hazing were far from your kind of parties.
Fate, as it would turn out, had different plans in store for you.
You had begrudgingly squeezed into a tight dress, letting Shoko fix your hair and makeup before she was dragging you out the door and into her car.
When you guys pulled up outside of the sorority house, the scene before you was far from what a typical party looked like. The lights were mostly off except for a few rooms that were still lit and it was eerily quiet outside, no loud music or drunk college students dancing around the lawn.
Shoko had assured you that it wouldn’t be as hectic as a frat party would but you hadn't expected it to be deader than your social life. You turn and glare at your friend in the driver's seat who looks just as confused as you do.
What the fuck was this? You could have been in bed, doom scrolling through TikTok and here you were, dressed up for a party that apparently wasn’t even happening.
“I’ll go check, give me a minute.” Shoko mummers, hitting her vape before jogging up to the front door.
Your leg anxiously bounces up and down while you wait, watching as she knocks and someone with purple hair opens the door a few seconds later. You can’t hear anything but the conversation seems heated and brief before your roommate is stomping back to the car, annoyance evident on her face.
“The party is canceled. Someone got the flu and the entire sorority is sick.”
You fight to hide your smile, not wanting to rub it in Shoko's face since she was already upset. As much as it sucks that someone was sick, you couldn’t deny that you were happy. You didn’t want to go out in the first place and now you could-
“Buut.” Shoko sings, eyes twinkling as she looks at you with that same smile from earlier.
“There is another party happening like ten minutes away.”
“Great.”
It was far from fucking great when you pulled up in front of what was obviously a fraternity. The white house was big enough that it was basically a mansion, it had a flag with greek letters flying and the amount of people out front alone made you sick, the music loud enough that you heard it from the opposite side of the street.
You hadn’t signed up for this, you wanted no parts in it.
“Absouletly not. Take me back.”
“Stop.” Shoko’s eyes were pleading, her bottom lip poking out. “We’re already here and you promised you’d be my wingman. Wingwoman. Whatever.”
“I didn't promise shit. You said we’d be going to a sorority party, not a frat!” Your cheeks heated in irrational anger, even though you knew it wasn’t her fault.
She had no idea how much you despised fraternities but it didn’t mean you’d be going to one just because she was putting on her best puppy face, big brown eyes shining and silently begging for you to say yes.
“One hour. If you still hate it, we leave. But you’re already here, might as well give it a chance.”
You look back toward the house, your stomach twisting and heart racing a little faster. You weighed the pros and cons. If you did agree to go, you'd probably end up drinking more than you should and wake up with a nasty hangover. You’d also be breaking your promise to yourself and your sister to never step foot in a fraternity.
Maybe it was unfair that you let a handful of horror stories shape your perception of them but it wasn’t as if they came from nowhere. You had watched the news, seen the headlines. Hazing. Alcohol poisoning. Freshmen being pressured into doing things they probably never wanted to do.
Your older sister had made sure you knew exactly what kind of places to avoid when you left for college, and frat houses had been at the very top of her list.
But then again, you had waited for this moment since you got your acceptance letter. To meet new people, make new memories outside of your shitty hometown and to truly experience college life.
You were nineteen. What was the harm in going to one party? You’d appease Shoko, confirm your thoughts that frats were terrible and never step foot in one again.
One night couldn’t ruin your entire college experience. Right?
You sighed and let Shoko pull your hand until you were walking through the front door and the smell of stale booze, and musky body heat hit you, the music rattling the speakers. The living room had been stripped of anything breakable and replaced with white folding tables sticky with spilled drinks and red solo cups.
A group of guys were playing beer pong, shouting as the ball flew too far and rolled under a couch. Further into the house, a girl was setting up a karaoke machine and slurring the lyrics to the Pitbull song that was playing, almost tumbling off the table.
The scene made you itch, your feet already hurting from the heels you’d been forced to wear. You let Shoko guide you through the crowd anyways, scowling at the way a few shirtless guys eyed you like you were nothing more than a piece of candy. She led you toward the kitchen, hand wrapped tight around yours, where a group had gathered around the island counter.
A tall guy with long black hair tied back noticed you first, grinning at Shoko and holy fuck he was hot.
“Shoko, I didn’t expect to see you here!” He raises his red solo cup in the air. “And you bought a friend.”
“This is my roommate, (name).” Shoko tugs you forward until you’re standing by her side. “Be nice to her, will you? She’s already planning my funeral for bringing her here.”
He nods at you, tossing back the rest of his drink and your knees go weak because he had to be one of the hottest guys you’d ever seen in your life.
“Geto Suguru but you can call me Suguru. Any friend of Shoko’s is a friend of mine.” He sticks his hand out and you wipe yours on your dress before reaching over the island and taking his into yours.
“Nice to meet you.” You force a shaky smile, pulling your hand back.
When you ask how they know each other, Suguru explains that they went to high school together but Shoko had decided to take a gap year and travel the country.
Shoko introduces you to the rest of her friend group. There was Choso, a guy with two ponytails and a scar across his nose. His girlfriend, Yuki, was nice enough even though you were sure she was flirting with you. Nanami, who seemed entirely too sweet to be there and next to him was the human incarnation of a golden retriever, Haibara.
After introductions were over, they pulled you into a game of flip cup and you were surprisingly good at it. The satisfaction of slamming your cup down before Choso was enough to make you forget where you were, cheap booze loosening you up and allowing you to truly enjoy yourself. Even if some asshole kept bumping into your ass and forgetting to apologize.
You even let Shoko and Yuki drag you to do karaoke, stupidly singing Promiscuous and moving your hips in circles, hair loose and falling into your flushed face. You hadn’t noticed the way Suguru watched you with a smirk, arms crossed while someone whispered something in his ear.
It only took an hour for you to be reminded that frats were in fact the root of all evil, your short lived fantasy that maybe you were wrong crashing down when he decided to show up.
You felt him before you saw him, your skin tingling as you sat on the couch and nursed a headache while actively fighting the urge to throw up, half listening to the group's conversation. You had just been about to tap Shoko and invoke your one-hour rule when the energy in the room shifted. The sea of people were parting to make way for someone, a few petrified freshmen scrambling to get out of the way.
When enough people cleared, two of the most unique looking men you’d ever seen came into view.
Now let’s get one thing straight: you were far from a pick me, never had been and you never would be. However, even you weren’t immune to the rare moment of being so mesmerized by the beauty of a man that you just stare with your mouth slightly agape.
One of them had pink hair and tattoos covering his face and massive arms. He was kind of scary looking but in the hottest way possible. It was a shame he already had someone on his arm. Then there was the guy next to him, with a backwards hat that white hair slipped out of and eyes so blue they looked fake.
Your brain short-circuited for exactly half a second. Fuck. He was in fact the hottest man you’d ever seen, forget what you said earlier. Objectively. Scientifically, whatever. It wasn’t even a matter of opinion, just facts.
He was lean and tall with the face of a god, a pointy nose and full lips and you had to squeeze your thighs together when he looked in your direction, though his eyes weren’t on you.
Shoko notices you staring and smirks. “Oh right. I forgot you haven’t met Gojo yet!”
“What?” You finally blink, glaring at your friend. “I wasn’t-”
“Satoru!” Shoko waved him over. “Come here, I want you to meet someone.”
Gojo locked eyes with her and smiled, leaning to whisper something to the man he had walked in with and handing him the case of beer he was carrying before moving toward the couch you were currently gripping.
He was even more handsome up close, the smell of his cinnamon cologne cutting through the stench of sweaty bodies and alcohol. It was too bad he had to open his mouth and ruin everything.
“Shoko.” His voice vibrates through you more than the music does, and it makes you feel pathetic. Since when have you ever let a man affect you like this? “Making new friends already?”
“This is my roommate,” Shoko says, gesturing toward you and tells him your name. “Play nice.”
When he turned those big blue eyes on you, your breath got caught in your throat, his smile widening as he held out his hand. “Well hello there. I’m Satoru, sophomore and president of this fine establishment.”
Sophomore and president of an entire frat? You didn’t want to think of what kind of douchebag he had to have been to pull that off. You reluctantly shake his hand and pull it away faster than you did Suguru’s, your mouth growing sour.
“You’re a quiet one.” He plops down on the couch between you and Shoko and you feel your irritation growing, your headache picking back up, mood completely ruined just from a few words. “It’s the hair, right? Or the eyes? Most people say the eyes. I get it, I’m a lot to process.”
He throws an arm on the couch behind you, leaning back and spreading his legs just wide enough to piss you the fuck off. Fuck this guy!
“Wow,” You say flatly, moving from under his arm and turning to face him. “Do you practice being insufferable, or does it just come naturally?”
Shoko snorts into her cup while Suguru who had been sitting next to her lets out a “oh shit” under his breath. This was his and Satoru’s second year here and he had never heard anyone snap at his friend.
Gojo’s smile didn’t falter. If anything, it grew as he leaned into your space. “Naturally. It’s a gift, but I’m sensing some hostility, sweetheart. Are you not enjoying yourself? I’m sure I can show you a better time upstairs.”
You wanted to throttle him. So this is what your sister was trying to warn you about? What a fucking idiot you were to doubt her for even a second.
“I’d rather eat glass then let you touch me.”
He simply laughs at that, moving a little closer and forcing you to awkwardly lean back, heat creeping up your neck and to your ears. He was close enough to kiss you and you were about to smack him until he smiled and moved to stand up.
“Nice to meet you, freshman. Maybe I’ll see you around, yeah?”
He disappears into the crowd and you want the floor to swallow you whole. You try to stay for the sake of your friend but each passing minute proves why you’d never show your face at these parties again.
People were passing out from how drunk they were, someone had almost thrown up on your shoes and to top it all off, loud cheers were sounding from the backyard. You were about to tell Shoko it was time to go when she started running toward the back door to see what was going on and you reluctantly followed.
The sight made your blood boil. Standing side by side was Gojo and the pink haired guy from earlier who you’d learn was Sukuna. There was a third guy with them, tall with broad shoulders, dark messy hair and a scar on his lip.
A line of freshmen boys stood at the edge of the pool, each looking paler than the last. Sukuna was barking out orders and you watched in horror as they began to take off their shirts and then their shoes and pants.
People were laughing, clapping and yelling for them to take off their underwear. You glared at the guy who said that, but he just shrugged and turned back to the show. Several phones appeared in the air despite Gojo’s threats that anyone caught recording would have them smashed.
This was so fucking sick.
The poor guys looked like they wanted the ground to swallow them whole and just when you moved to put an end to this, an arm reached out to stop you. You snapped your head up, ready to lay into the person until a familiar set of dark eyes stared down at you.
Suguru.
“Get off of me.” You say through gritted teeth, pure anger making your heart beat faster and your blood pump harder.
“Don’t do anything stupid.” He warns you and you suddenly hate him as much as his prick of a friend, snatching away from him and turning back to the scene unfolding.
Without an ounce of sympathy, Gojo clapped his hands together and nodded to the freshmen, his shorts hanging loose on his hips.
"No need to be nervous. We've all got the same equipment!”
"If you're too embarrassed to strip," The scarred lip dude shouts over the cheering crowd. "you're probably too soft to wear our letters anyway."
A little motivating glare from Sukuna who looked even less interested in preserving anyone's dignity and they were stripping off the remainder of their clothes. You stared in absolute disbelief as the first pledge squeezed his eyes shut, signaled something that looked like a prayer and canonballed into the pool completely naked.
One by one the others followed and you started to push through the crowd of students, ignoring Shoko yelling your name and evading Suguru’s attempt to grab you again.
Any microscopic chance you'd had of warming up to fraternities evaporated on the spot. These people were insane, fucking psychopaths and deserved a taste of their own medicine.
By the time you reached the pool, the pledges were climbing out of the water, shivering and red-faced as older fraternity members tossed towels in their direction. They looked humiliated, their smiles not fooling you for a second.
“Hey asshole!” You shout toward the white haired douchebag, storming up to him and gaining the attention of the crowd who started to quiet down to listen to the spectacle you were creating.
Good. Let them watch!
Gojo, who had been in the middle of laughing at something Sukuna said, looked at you and the grin spreading across his face only further annoyed you. He was so fucking hot but his personality sucked!
“Couch girl!”
You ignore him, walking until you were close enough to stick your arm out and push his chest. He hardly moved but it was enough to knock that stupid smug smirk off his face for a split second before the corner of his mouth was lifting again.
"What kind of pathetic excuse for leadership is this?" You gestured toward the soaking pledges who did their best to cover themselves with their small towels as they exchanged nervous glances. "Making them strip in front of half the campus because you think it's funny?"
“It was voluntary.” Sukuna spat, folding his arms and scowling at you, but you kept your eyes on Gojo who steps a little close to you.
“Oh please. Do you really expect me to believe a bunch of freshmen are gonna tell the people deciding if they get into this fraternity or not, ‘no’?”
When someone in the crowd yelled that you had a point, Sukuna shot them a glare from the deepest pits of hell that had them shutting up and cowering back into the crowd.
Meanwhile Gojo looked thoroughly entertained, that bastard. Not a hint of embarrassment on his face as he reaches forward and twirls a piece of your hair around his finger. His carefree attitude catches you off guard and you’re dumb founded, losing yourself in his big blue eyes before snapping out of it and pushing him away again.
“You’ve known me for what..” He pulls his hand away and looks at the imaginary watch on his wrist. “Two hours and you’re already lecturing me? We're basically an old married couple already.”
Your eye twitches. You hadn’t really thought of how he would react but amusement was the furthest thing you’d expect from someone getting scolded like an insolent child.
You take a step back, not missing the way he eyes your body and your skin crawls.
“Fuck you dude! I wouldn’t let someone like you touch me with a ten foot pole, let alone let you marry me.”
He tilts his head as the crowd snickers and you grow impossibly hotter. You can feel Shoko pulling your arm but your feet are glued to the ground. It would take an act of god to get you to move before you were done saying what you had to say.
“Aww don’t be shy now. You’re making me feel self conscious too.”
The words get under your skin more than you should have let them and the look on his face, the slight glint in his eyes tells you that he knows it. Before you can rip into him, the scarred lip dude butts in, pushing between the two of you.
“Cute." He rolls his eyes. "Now either kiss or kill each other somewhere else. We've got pledges to traumatize."
You glare over his shoulder at Gojo one more time, seething at the way he winks at you, clearly finding this entire thing entertaining, before letting Shoko pull you away this time. If you saw him fifty years down the line it would still be too soon!
You had to get an uber since you and Shoko were both too tipsy to drive and you outright declined Suguru’s offer to drop you off, having had your fix of frat boys for the next century.
You rested your temple against the cool glass of the car window, nursing the dull ache forming behind your eyes while your stomach churned from the cheap vodka and lingering irritation.
Gojo Satoru.
Just thinking of his name made your jaw tighten.
He wasn't the first arrogant person you’d met. You’d known plenty in high school, cocky guys who were captains of some team or were blessed with a nice jawline and thought the world revolved around them.
Gojo surpassed all of them.
He wasn’t just cocky, but the kind of person that took everything as a joke, constantly performing and acting as if everyone around him was just a part of one big act. And the worst part about it, the part you refused to let yourself think of for more than a second because fuck that, was that he had no business looking the way he did.
It was almost offensive that someone as infuriating as him had a face that made you want to forget every sin he committed.
You would just have to try your best to stay far away from him, steer clear of frat houses, frat parties, and anywhere someone like him might possibly show up.
Later that night you and Shoko are both wide awake, laying in the dark listening to the faint sounds of the occasional car or ambulance flying by. You’re still fuming, your earlier encounter making it hard for you to find sleep.
“Hey Sho?”
“Yes?”
“If you ever invite me to anything that asshole is at again, I’ll kill you both.”
“Noted.”
That was the day you grew to hate Satoru Gojo and the day he fell in love with you.
Now here you were. Your junior year came faster than you thought it would.
In the time since you started at Jujutsu University, you joined the cheer team, made the dean’s list multiple times and built a tight knit friend group that consisted of you, Shoko, Utahime, Yuki and occasionally Suguru.
Best of all, you had mostly stuck to your promise and kept away from Gojo, with the exception of a few incidents during your sophomore year when he had decided that you would be his new target of interest. It didn’t matter that you made your disdain for him clear, he never really gave up on his desperate attempts to win you over.
One of the most memorable times was when you picked up Shoko from an invite only party and he answered the door. He was grinning, telling you that he knew you couldn’t resist him and lifting his black shades to his head, blue eyes flashing.
"This is my favorite plot twist so far."
You bit your tongue and rolled your eyes, telling him you were here for Shoko only but nothing you said would get through that massive inflated head of his.
“You were invited by the way. Why didn't you come?” He actually frowns and you fight the urge to pinch yourself because he genuinely looks like a kicked puppy and you hate the way it tugs on your heart for a split second before you remember who you’re talking to.
“Because your last party fucking sucked.”
His ticking jaw and flared nostrils were your only signs that you had finally gotten to him before he was covering it up, licking his lips and looking down at your glossed ones with a grin.
“Oh so you’re one of those girls.” He clicks his tongue, giving a dramatic shake of his head.
“Excuse me?” You cross your arms, chest already growing tight with irritation. This was supposed to be a quick pick up and somehow you ended up stuck talking to the one person you wanted to avoid.
“You know.. a judgmental stuck up bitch.”
You had smiled, pride swelling in your chest because yes.. that’s exactly what you were and you hoped that now he’d take a fucking hint and leave you alone. If you were a little meaner maybe you’d scare him away for good.
“That’s one way to put it.”
“You’re so evil.” He leans against the door frame, lowering his shades back to his face. “It’s hot, you’re just my type of girl, sweets.”
The first week of your junior year had gone great, you hadn’t seen Gojo once which was a blessing in disguise since as you would later find out, you were both majoring in psychology. Your first day of cheer practice was coming up, you and Shoko were still sharing a dorm in your third year, your professors were all amazing and you managed to score an interview for a research internship next summer.
Everything had been going in your favor.
It felt like you were on top of the world until the white haired devil himself walked into the lecture hall, dressed in a snapback, faded jeans and a football jersey. He looked out of place. Suguru was by his side as they looked for a seat and your heart was pounding as you snapped your head forward so fast it was painful, not wanting him to feel you staring.
You sunk into your seat and dipped your head.
No, no, no! What the fuck was he doing here? Did he get lost? There was no way someone like Satoru Gojo would actually be taking a psychology class without being forced into it. Suguru, maybe. Satoru? He belonged in someone's business class, maybe engineering.
There was simply no universe in which he voluntarily enrolled in social psychology.
But it didn’t matter what you thought, because he was here and you could hear him getting closer to you, his voice sending sparks down your spine. Just when you thought you were going to get lucky, the sound of a chair scraping beside you made your stomach flip.
Painfully, you turned your head just as Gojo plopped down onto the seat to your right, his cologne invading your senses. Suguru apologized as he squeezed into the thin space to slip past you, taking the seat to your left.
What a genius you were, picking a spot with two free seats on either side of you.
Fantastic. Now you were trapped and Gojo only nodded at you when you glared at him, clearly fighting a smile as he leaned back in his seat as if he’d won a battle in this silent war you’d been in for two years.
This was fine. You’d just ignore him like you always did. He thrived off of attention, so you would simply deprive him of it.
Easy enough right? That’s what you thought until he opened his mouth and you remembered just how easily he got under your skin. How good he was at provoking a reaction out of you and it didn’t help that he looked hot as fuck with his skin slightly tanned from summer break, arms and chest a little bigger.
“Would you look at that? Looks like we’re classmates now, princess.”
You tried to ignore him, really you did but whenever he was around you simply lost all sense of rationality, ten brain cells dying with every word that came out of his mouth.
“Don’t call me that.” You keep your eyes forward, trying to listen to the professor who was going over what you’d be covering this week.
“Noted, princess.”
Surprisingly, you make it through most of class without Gojo bothering you. He only looks your way once but quickly turns his head when you catch him eyeing your exposed legs and pull your skirt down, his cheek dusted a light pink.
You ignore the way you feel your ears burning from the attention, a desperate ache growing between your legs.
"Before anyone gets too comfortable, I should let you know this course revolves around a semester-long research project."
A collective groan ripples through the lecture hall but your professor smiles anyways.
"You'll be working in pairs. By the end of the semester, you'll present a research-backed analysis of interpersonal attraction and the psychological mechanisms that influence it. This isn't a project you can throw together the night before. You'll be meeting with your partner regularly throughout the term."
Partners? Fuck!
You were a smart girl, always had been but working in groups had never been your strong suit. You were hyper independent and hated relying on others to carry their weight, especially when they hardly ever did. You either ended up doing all the work yourself or none of it, there was no in between.
"To avoid everyone choosing their friends, I've paired you using a wheel spinner."
A projector illuminated the screen behind her and names began appearing in two neat columns. You leaned forward, quickly scanning for your name and when you found it, you read it again.
And again, and again until you were shaking your head no and clenching your fists.
Gojo, Satoru — [Full Name]
"...You've got to be kidding me." The words come out louder than you meant for them to, your professor looking at you with a raised brow.
“I’m afraid there will be no changes. If anyone is unsatisfied with their partner you’re welcome to make your case after class but I'm afraid my decision is final unless you are at risk of being harmed.”
Did your emotional well being count? This was disastrous, a catastrophic fuck up and you would in fact take her up on her offer and be having a word with your professor once everyone left. You’d get on your knees and beg if you had to.
Gojo’s lightly laughed beside you and you snap your head toward him with the meanest glare you can muster, eyes burning with fury.
“What could possibly be funny?”
He shrugs, biting his bottom lip and staring at your strawberry gloss covered one, not giving a fuck that you could see him checking you out. You squeeze your thighs, annoyed at the way your body was reacting to his attention, betraying you in a way that was unforgivable.
“Guess fate ships us.”
Cheer practice hadn’t gone any better. As it turned out, Gojo had joined the football team and watching him run around all sweaty with his hair sticking to his head, kicking a ball in his blue uniform, was bad for someone trying to nail down their newest routine.
The cheer gym was delayed on its remodeling and the auxiliary gym had been in use so the only free space was the football field, hence your current situation.
It was hot, and you kept fucking up your stunts, eyes lazer focused on the field, instantly finding a set of white hair whenever you got tossed in the air. He hadn’t been looking at you, instead focusing on winning the mock game between teammates.
Yet he was still a nuisance even when he wasn’t trying to be and it didn’t help that you were still fired up from your conversation with your professor from earlier. When you begged to swap places with someone else, she had told you that ‘i don’t get along with fratboys’ wasn’t a legitimate reason to switch partners and that the project was worth fifty percent of your grade so you’d better find common ground fast.
Another thing nagging at you? You had only gotten laid a handful of times in the last year. Discovering you had an abnormally high libido after losing your virginity at the end of freshman year had been rough. Every guy you tried to build something with either couldn’t last more than two rounds before tapping out or wanted something more.
You weren’t looking for a relationship, just someone to help you get off once or twice a day. Your vibrators could only do so much. You craved the real thing, but struggled to find someone who could meet your needs.
"Focus!" Your captain's voice snapped you back to reality.
You blinked, realizing you had been staring at Gojo as he power kicked the ball into the net from halfway across the field, kicking dirt up. It was hot as fuck and irritated you at the same time.
“Sorry.”
You shake your head, stepping into position and letting your bases lock their grips around your ankles before they launch you upward. The familiar rush of adrenaline hits as soon as your body lifts into the air, muscle memory taking over as you balance yourself.
You should have been focused on your counts, on the people responsible for catching you if something went wrong. What did you do instead? You let your eyes wander until they found him again, heart lurching when you saw that he was already staring at you.
He waved and even from a distance you could tell he was smirking at you, ball in his hand as he pointed at the net and lowered it back to the ground. He moved his head from side to side, looking at you one last time before kicking the ball so hard that it almost took the goalie out, slamming into the back of the net.
Your cheeks burned, the ache from earlier returning.
You were completely unaware that you were one second away from falling because your brain apparently thought watching him was more important than not breaking your neck. Stupid girl.
“Eyes up!” Your captain's voice rang through the air and you forced your gaze down, correcting your posture before your bases caught you as you landed safely.
When your feet hit the ground you exhale sharply, slightly stumbling. Gojo had gone back to playing, as if he hadn’t almost killed you by distracting you.
“Are you alright? You’ve been out of it this entire time-”
“I’m fine! Let’s go again.”
You weren’t fine. You had just discovered that your brain was your biggest enemy, betraying you with a sudden attraction to your nemesis. That psychology degree was going to be very useful, now that you needed to diagnose why Satoru had become your biggest distraction.
Remember when I said, one might wonder how you of all people ended up with Gojo between your legs? Well here’s the straw that broke your back.
With the way your day had been going, you weren’t really surprised when your shift had gone to shit within the first thirty minutes. You hadn’t even changed out of your cheer uniform and were grateful your manager was nice about it and only made you put on an apron.
You were a baker at a small shop, and while you usually only iced pastries and baked bread, the cashier had called out so you were forced to cover both positions.
After ringing up the nastiest group of teenagers, you accidentally burned an entire rack of focaccia bread and your finger in the process. Your manager was understanding and thankfully had been able to find someone to cover your shift. You weren’t happy about missing out on money but at least you could lay in your bed and relax after the shit day you had. Right?
Wrong!
Usually when Shoko has company, she texts you beforehand to let you know, so imagine your surprise when you walk into your dorm and you’re scarred for life with the sight of a random’s man ass as he fucks your friend into the mattress.
The worst part is that they don’t even notice you! No one jumps up in shock and rushes to cover themselves. They continue to fuck like animals, as if you weren’t standing in the hall in shock.
After a few seconds you realize you should probably leave, jealousy coursing through you as you slam the door and storm from the building. Even Shoko, who never showed romantic or sexual interest in anyone, was getting laid while you were barely getting by with your toys.
Fine. If you weren't going to get some rest, you could at least be productive.
The library was the perfect place to study, especially at this time of night. Most people were partying, working or if they were Shoko, getting fucked in their dorms. Libraries didn't contain drunk assholes, frat presidents trying to flirt with you or rude customers screaming at you over something you couldn’t control. It was calm. Quiet.
And closed..
You stared at the locked doors, legs aching from the walk you just took to get here, thumb still hurting from earlier. You slowly walk to the locked doors, shrugging your cheer bag over your shoulder and checking the sign posted on the front door.
CLOSED DUE TO SHORT STAFFING
The universe was working against you, repaying you for some sin you committed in a past life and deciding you weren’t even allowed one small win today. And to make matters worse, you were still in your cheer uniform and it was getting chilly out.
You blamed Gojo. All of your issues started the moment he walked into that fucking lecture hall and decided to sit next to you. You were completely distracted after that which led to a shit cheer practice, a thirty minute shift and a burnt finger, and walking in on your best friend getting fucked.
You could kill him right now and not feel an ounce of remorse, even if you logically knew it wasn’t really his fault. You had to blame someone.
You read the sign again, as if it would magically change and the library would open. It was closed and you were fucked. Simple.
Based on the rare times Shoko did bring someone to your room, it lasted a few hours but you were always at work so it had never been a problem until today.
"Unbelievable." You dropped your head back with a groan, tightening your grip on your bag and staring into the dark sky. Of course the one night you needed somewhere quiet to hide, the universe decided to laugh in your face.
You kick lightly at the pavement, annoyed at yourself more than anyone else. If you hadn’t cut off the last guy you had been sleeping with just because he tried to invite you to a frat party, maybe you’d also be getting fucked right now.
It was your own fault really. You were too stubborn for your own good, your mother would tell you. “No one will want to put up with your high demands.” as if you hadn’t gotten that trait from her. That was fine. You didn’t need anything more from a man than sex, but no one had been able to match your high drive.
“I just need…” You look at the door again, tugging the handle just in case someone had forgotten to take down the sign.
Locked.
“God dammit!”
A laugh sounded from behind you and you froze, knowing exactly who it was without even turning around. Apparently the universe hadn't finished ruining your night yet. Yay, you.
“Rough night?”
You ball your fists and take a deep breath, counting to three and fighting back tears of frustration. When you turned around, you took in a sharp breath at the sight in front of you.
Gojo was holding a textbook under his arm and wearing a brown cardigan with a blue shirt underneath, light beige pants and were those..
He was wearing glasses. Not shades but bulky glasses that made him look kinda nerdy and the sight had the hair on your arms standings and your pupils expanding. He looked like a completely different person but you could tell it was him from the signature smirk he wore.
He stares at you with a titled head and you swallow the spit forming in your mouth. You weren’t seriously thirsty over Gojo right now, right? I mean, you knew you were sex deprived but he was everything you stood against so why were you staring at him like he was the best thing to walk the earth since Jesus himself?
“What are you doing here?”
“Came to study. Crazy concept, right?”
Your hand tightens around the handle of your bag, eyes drifting back to the textbook he was holding, though that was far from what you were staring at. Since when did Gojo have such huge hands and why were you attracted to his veins protruding as he grips the book?
“For you, yeah.”
“Ouch.” He laughs, soft and gentle and the sound has your pussy clenching against nothing. No fucking way was your body betraying you right now. You had never in your life clenched at a laugh, nor grown wet at the sight of someone and yet it was happening no matter how hard you tried to ignore it.
Gojo hadn’t even touched you, nor made any kind of sexual joke like he typically would and yet you were acting like a cat in heat.
“You really think so little of me? I’m kind of heartbroken.”
Yes. But you don’t say it, just look back at the dark building in defeat. Gojo notices and looks over your shoulder, his own sagging as he mumbles something you can’t understand.
“That’s unfortunate. You need somewhere to study, sweets? We can go to my place.”
You’re turning to him so fast your head spins, shoulders stiff as you prepare to lay into him but he beats you before you can even open your mouth, hands come up defensively.
“Not at the frat, I only live there part time. I have an apartment off campus, and a desk we can use.”
He waits for you to say something before giving up and sighing in exhaustion. You could tell he was annoyed but you didn’t care. If he was going to try to get you back to his place, he’d have to try a little harder than whatever this was.
“We should probably study together anyways right? You know, since we’re partners now..”
You should have said no, told him to fuck off but he did have a point. The library was closed, your roommate was otherwise occupied, and the faster you and Gojo finished your project, the sooner you’d never have to see each other again.
"One hour."
His grin appeared immediately as he held his free hand out to you. "Knew you couldn't resist me."
You scuff and move past him, getting into the passenger seat and making sure you glared out the window the entire ride there.
Gojo didn’t live far, no more than twenty minutes away from campus and you were grateful. Being in an enclosed space with him was hard enough, especially since the entire thing smelled of that cinnamon cologne that drove you crazy.
He tried to talk to you. About football practice, the assignment, the terrible song on the radio, anything to hear your voice but you were dead set on ignoring him, answering in low grunts and one word responses.
“The uniform is hot by the way. Had no idea you were a cheerleader, but I can’t say I mind watching you while I practice. The next time you want my attention though, just ask. No need to risk cracking your head open just to look at me.”
You’re insulted, face burning but you won’t feed into this petty spat he clearly wants to have. In the two years you’ve known him and the times you had to suffer his presence, you came to learn that everything he said was to get a reaction out of you.
Not this time.
“Gojo?”
“Yes, princess?”
“Shut up.”
Gojo’s apartment smelled like expensive air freshener and a faint trace of weed he swore he didn’t smoke anymore and it was from Sukuna and Suguru who had been over earlier. You ignored him, dropping your bag on the living room floor and looking around.
It was nice. Not spotless but cleaner than you thought it would be. Most of the furniture, you noticed, was black. His couch, the tables and chairs, even the curtains.
A stack of textbooks sat on his coffee table alongside a half-empty sports drink and what looked like a few polaroids. You move to get a better look but before you can really see anything, Gojo brushes past you and snatches them.
“Tsk, nosey girl.” He clicks his tongue and moves toward the kitchen. “Do you want anything?”
An hour later, you’re full off the takeout food Gojo got delivered and knee deep in your studies. You try to ignore the fact that the desk you’re sitting at is in his fucking bedroom but if he wasn’t overreacting to it then you weren’t going to either.
The last thing you needed right now was for Gojo to get distracted. He had actually been focusing on the project, refraining from making any crude comments or staring at your breast though you’d caught him looking at your bare legs once.
"Interpersonal attraction refers to the positive feeling one person forms toward another,'" You were sitting together at his desk as he read aloud from the textbook while you took notes. "'Researchers generally agree attraction develops through a combination of biological, cognitive, behavioral, and environmental factors.'"
You typed the definition into your outline while he skimmed farther down.
"'Repeated exposure to an individual tends to increase positive feelings toward them, even in the absence of meaningful interaction.'"
You don’t miss the way he lets his shoulder bump into yours, body moving an inch closer to yours. You have to squeeze your legs and bite back the moan creeping up your throat. He was still wearing the glasses, claiming his contacts were drying his eyes and that you would have known he wore them if you spent more than five minutes around him without ripping his head off.
You clear your throat and lean your body the opposite way. "The mere exposure effect."
"Mhmm. Which basically means people annoy each other until they fall in love."
Your fingers paused over the keyboard, slightly shaking as you look over at him. He was already staring, having moved closer to you again. The desk was big enough to hold both your laptops but small enough that you still invaded each other's space, his trick of turning his chair to face you doing nothing now that his knees brushed against the side of your thigh.
He was reaching a hand out to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear and you didn’t stop him, didn’t yell at him to fuck off. You just sat there, breathless, mind trying to process what was happening as he frowned at your lip tucked between your teeth.
"That’s not what it says." You whisper and he leans in closer, the corner of his mouth tugging in a small smile, eyes soft behind his glasses.
Gojo had been a thorn in your side since freshman year. He was everything you hated: arrogant, a fratboy, rich nepo baby, and a massive fuckboy that played with girls' hearts like they were toys meant for his entertainment.
But he was also infuriatingly smart when he bothered to try, and right now, he was watching you with an intensity that made your skin prickle and your pussy grow wet.
“Sure, whatever my princess says.” His voice is sultry and low as he reaches a hand out again to rubs his thumb on your lower lip, pulling it out before letting go.
You swallow hard, butterflies fluttering in your belly. “You’re insufferable.”
“And you’re tense.” He lets his hand travel to your shoulder, slow enough so that you could pull away, and when you don’t, he continues tracing your exposed collarbone, toying with the v-neck of your top.
“You’ve hated me for three years. That takes a lot of passion, ever wonder why you care so much?”
You opened your mouth to yell at him, to defend yourself against what he was implying because you had plenty of reasons to hate him but couldn’t think of any at this moment. Your brain was short circuiting and it was humiliating.
“I don’t care.” You manage to spit out.
Gojo’s eyes darkened, his grin fading. “Liar.”
His other hand slid up your thigh, creeping under your skirt and still, you didn't move away. Instead you decided to embarrass yourself even further and spread your legs to give him easier access.
“The chapter says physical attraction can override rational judgment. Maybe that’s what’s happening here. You claim I'm an asshole but you’re still sitting in my room, letting me touch you.”
“I’m-, oh!” You cry when he hovers over your clothed cunt, barely touching it and you’re bucking against him for more. So pathetic, so stupid. “I’m merely analyzing the s-subject matter.”
“Yeah, princess? Let’s put that theory to the test. I’ll keep touching you..” He turns your chair toward him, ignoring the way you gasp and glare at him for the loss of contact. He pulls it closer, the legs scrapping against the floorboard.
“And we’ll see if your rational judgment kicks in.”
He taps your thigh and you lift your hips as he pulls your panties down and tosses them over his shoulder. He’s spreading your legs again, further this time and he doesn’t waste a moment. His fingers are rubbing against your slit and you toss your head onto the back of the chair, hips shaking as you whine into his hand.
Gojo moved to kneel in front of you, his middle finger slipping between your folds and nudging at your entrance. When you looked down at him, entire body on fire, he was staring up at you as if looking for your approval.
Obviously grinding against him like a desperate whore wasn’t enough. No, Gojo wanted to hear you, to humiliate you and mock you for all the shit you had given him just to let him finger you when you should have been working on your project.
“Use your words or I'll stop.” He goes to pull his fingers away and your heart lurches.
The last thing you wanted was to beg him of all people but you were too far gone to not get something out of this. So you swallow your pride and nod.
“Keep going, you fucking jerk.”
He chuckles and grabs your thighs, placing them both over his shoulders. “I’m about to eat your pussy and you still can’t be nice to me.”
You don’t respond and he’s pushing his middle and index fingers through your neglected hole, not giving you any time to adjust before leaning down and taking your clit in his mouth.
“Satoru!” You cry out his name and the sound of coming from your lips has him groaning against you and closing his eyes to savor it.
You reach a hang out to grab his hair, looking down and clenching around his fingers because the way he has his head under your skirt is so fucking hot you think you might cum on the spot. He was so hungry for you that he didn’t even properly undress you, greedy man that he was.
His fingers curl inside of you, pumping a little faster as he licks up and down your slit, stopping to suck on your clit each time he passes it. When you try to close your legs, he grabs your thigh with his free hand and pulls it further open.
“Mmff, shtay righ' there.” He mumbles against your pussy, wrapping his lips back around your clit and sucking hard, using his teeth to lightly nibble and you’re leaking so much you can feel it dripping down your thighs.
This wasn’t the kind of research you had been expecting to do but you would accept it just this once, for the sake of your grade of course. This is also the longest he’s ever been quiet in your presence and if you had known that he was such a good pussy eater you would have put his mouth to use long ago.
‘Haaah, go deeper, I- oh god, nggghh I need more!” You grind against his face harder, gripping his hair and pulling him closer.
He just moans encouragingly, burying his fingers knuckles deep and fucking you dumb with them. Your squishy walls contracted around his fingers and with the next curl of them, you were wrapping your legs around his head and cumming so hard that your vision turned white, orgasm stealing your sight while you buck wildly against his face.
You were making a huge mess but Gojo didn’t seem to mind, licking you through it and only slowing his fingers when your legs dropped. He placed a kiss on your pussy before pulling from under your skirt and sucking on his fingers, looking right up at you.
His glasses were crooked, face glistening with your release and his cheeks were flushed red. Your chest heaved up and down dramatically as you fought to breathe properly again.
You couldn't remember the last time you came that hard and irritated you, made you crave more but you could never let him touch you again. This was a mistake, a serious lapse of judgement and yet you still needed more, your pussy already coming back to life.
You quickly stand and pull your skirt down, legs weak as you move around Gojo to find your panties, mortified at your own feelings right now. You just let a frat president go down on you and now you were thinking of how he would fuck you?
Clearly you weren’t in the right state of mind.
“You’re not tired of running away from me yet?” Gojo snaps, all sense of playfulness gone.
He was annoyed, you could hear it in his voice. Not that you cared but he was your ride here so you might as well appease him a little, right?
“I’m not running!” You yell, fingers digging into your palms. You were so beyond angry with yourself, disappointed that you got this far without falling into his den and now here you were. “I got what I wanted, the theory was correct but I think this study session has lasted longer than it should have.”
He looks at you in disbelief, taking his glasses off with a sigh and setting them on the desk before walking over to you, running his hand through his messy hair.
You were frozen. Every rational part of your brain screamed at you to shove him away and walk out. But your body was humming, and the way he looked at you made you want more.
He hovered over you, grabbing your chin and titling your head back so he can look you in the eyes, his other hand on your hip and playing with the waistband of your skirt.
“I can tell you haven’t been touched properly in a long time. Why do you insist on pretending like you don’t feel this pull between us, even if we hate each other?”
“You hate me?” Your lip twitches. While you can confidently say you despised him, he never gave the impression that he felt the same unless he had some sick way of showing it.
Gojo frowns and you hate how beautiful he looks. “No, never. I do want to fuck you though, so maybe we can help each other out.”
He pulls your skirt down just a little, fingers rubbing at the skin on your hip and sending a shiver through your body.
“Kind of like.. an arrangement. You can keep on hating me in public but in this room, I get to fuck you for as long as I want. Call it research for our project. Deal?”
You take a minute to think about it.
You were still seething at yourself for letting him touch. This meant nothing, you still hated him but even you had needs that needed to be met and if Gojo made you cum that hard from his fingers and tongue, you had to know what his cock could do.
“Fine, but I should warn you that I have a really high libido that most men can’t keep up with. If it’s too much I’ll just find-”
He cuts you off with a laugh, grabbing your hips and pulling you close enough that you feel his rock hard cock twitching against your stomach. He grabs the back on your neck and squeezes until you’re looking up at him again.
“You just haven’t been with a real man yet, princess. But don’t worry, I'll take real good care of you. Now take off your fucking clothes.”
You bite your tongue, resisting the urge to ask who he was talking to and at the same time, kicking yourself because you kind of liked it.
“Safe word?” He asked, unbuttoning his pants and stepping out them, his bulge huge against his white boxers, a small wet spot sitting on the front of them.
You roll your eyes and lift your shirt off, then your skirt. “We’re not children. Our safe words are stop and no.”
He nods and pulls his cardigan off and then the shirt underneath. Holy fucking sleeper build. Gojo was ripped but you’d never be able to tell under the clothes he wears. You’re taken aback by just how attractive he was, remembering the day you first saw him and how he was ten times hotter now.
Still a fratboy, still a prick but even you couldn't deny that he was one of the most stunning humans out there. Kind of otherworldly if you thought about it long enough.
“How about kissing? You cool with that, orrr?” He asks while pulling his boxers down and stepping out of them, his cock hitting his stomach and it was definitely the biggest one you’d ever seen. Thick and pulsing, pre leaking from the mushroom tip.
“Off limits. We’re strictly enemies with benefits, nothing more.”
There was no need to make this more difficult than it already was. You were beating yourself up for even being attracted to him, then to add kissing on top of that? You needed to save a shred of your dignity so you would be keeping your kisses.
“Fine, and we always use condoms. Not trying to be a dad in college like Toji. And no whining.”
You nod in agreement even though you were on birth control, snapping your bra off and tossing it, letting Gojo admire you and relishing in the way he looks like a lovestruck fool, hearts basically bursting in his eyes.
You don’t give him long, moving to climb on his bed and lay on your back. Your body was tight with need and you hadn’t even realized what you were doing, spreading your legs and playing with your pussy.
Gojo stands by the side of the bed and watches you as he reaches into the nightstand for a condom, using his teeth to rip it open and stroking it on.
You feel the bed dip first, his body climbing between yours, using his legs to nudge yours further open and then the heat of his cock pressing against your thigh.
“Fuck, you look so perfect.”
You open your eyes and if you didn’t hate him you’d say the same thing. His white hair messy on his head, the longer pieces falling into his bright blue eyes. His body was perfect, his shoulders not too broad but muscular, his waist thinner.
“Whatever, just fuck me.” You huff and in a blink he’s smacking his cock on your pussy then lining himself up with your entrance.
His heat engulfs you when he lays over your body, tapping your thigh so you wrap your leg around his waist.
He places his forehead on yours and smiles as sweetly as possible, one hand digging into the bed above your head to hold him up, the other placed on your hip.
“Ready?” He nudges your nose, gripping the sheets to stop himself from kissing you.
You bit your lip and nod, before stopping and pushing at his chest when he starts to nudge the tip in. “If you tell anyone about this, I’ll ruin your life.”
He rolls his eyes, swallowing the words ‘you already have’. “Sure, now can I fuck you?”
When he pushes the first few inches in, you gasp from the sting and before you can stop him he’s leaning down and pressing his soft lips against yours to quiet you.
He squeezes your hip and with one more brutal thrust, he was inside you, filling you to the hilt in one go. You cried into his mouth and he swallowed it, your back arching off the bed as he bottomed out, his balls pressing against your ass. He was almost too big, stretching you in ways that should’ve been painful but wasn’t.
He was the perfect fit, just what you had been looking for, the tip of his cock pressing deliciously against your cervix.
“Fuck, you take me so well,” he groaned, pulling back to look at you before slamming into you again. And again, his hips pistoned against yours, each snap of his pelvis driving him deeper and grinding onto your clit, your toes curling from the intense pleasure.
“Satoru! Huuuh, yes, fuck me just like that!” You tighten your legs around his waist, moving your hips up to meet his.
You clawed at his back, your nails leaving red marks as he fucked you like he hated you. Like he wanted to ruin you and punish you for making him wait years to do this. And god, did you love it.
“Harder,” you gasped.
He laughed darkly, gripping your throat just enough to make your vision swim. “You want it rough, baby? S-shit! You want me to fuck you like the enemy that you are?”
“Yes Satoru! P-please.”
In a flash he was flipping you over, placing you on your hands and knees and slamming back into you before you could catch your breath. Your ass was in the air and he pushed your head down until it was flat on the mattress, his hands tight on your waist as he pounded into you, his hips snapping against yours with a bruising force.
Thank god he had his own place because each thrust had the bed rocking and sent a jolt of hot pleasure through you, your pussy clench around him and making obscene wet squelching noises that only fueled his hunger for you.
Gojo picked up his pace, veiny cock rubbing against your walls and he wished he could feel your raw pussy, wanted to stuff you full of his cum but he knew better so he ignored his instinct and focused on fucking you.
The cries you let slip out are music to his ears, a song he wanted to hear every fucking day but he would settle for tonight, for now. He leans forward and fucks into you harder, hand squeezing your boob and twisting your nipples, pinching and pulling until you’re whimpering, tears pooling down your face.
“Didn’t I say no whining? Be a good girl, princess.”
You don’t hear what he’s saying, too drunk on his cock as he fucks you stupid, drool spilling from your mouth and onto the sheet. The sight has Gojo groaning, his balls tightening as he splits you open on his cock and fucks you stupid.
“Shit, look at you. All fucked out. Fucking take it baby. Take my cock like a good cum slut.”
His words have you shaking violently with your second orgasm, eyes rolled back as he fucked you through it, squirting heavy on his cock and making a beautiful mess.
“Never letting anyone fuck you again.” He pushes you further onto the bed, your stomach flat against the mattress as he grinds deep into you, completely dominating you, his hands gripping the sheets above you. “This is mine, say it’s my pussy, baby. Tell me you belong to me-fuck-haaah.”
You don’t answer but the way you’re crying for more is enough to satisfy Gojo and he’s filling the condom with white hot cum, gasping as wave after wave of pleasure rocks him, his hips twitching as he empties himself into the latex.
He gives sloppy, lazy thrusts as he rides it out, pushing deep into you one last time before pulling out and falling onto his back next to you. While you come back down to earth, he’s ripping the condom off, tying it and tossing it into the trash before reaching for another one.
Before you know it, he’s rolling it and pulling you onto his lap, lining himself up and pulling you down onto his cock while pushing up into you, fingers digging into your hips.
“Ready for round two?” He smirks when you start to move despite still trying to remember how to breathe properly.
He doesn’t stop after that, keeps fucking you until you’re on the verge of passing out, body weak and shaking but still wanting more.
“What number are we at now, four? Come on, princess. Gimme another one, I know you can do it. Gotta get to five, it’s my favorite number.”
Holy shit.. Gojo was everything you had been looking for in a sexual partner. You had been fucking for two hours now and yet he still has the energy of a man running on spite and arrogance.
It was almost comical. You were a fucking goddess, you could get anyone you wanted, any man would be lucky to have you. Yet the only one who seemed to know how to satisfy you was the one guy you couldn’t stand.
Not that any of that mattered when he had you riding his cock, again, your pussy swollen from how hard he’d been fucking you without tiring. Your clit was overstimulated but he kept rubbing it anyway, your back arching as you felt the pressure building in your belly again.
“C-can’t Toru’” You slurred, drooling dripping down your chin, your face completely wet with tears, makeup long ruined.
“I believe in you, baby.” He smacks your ass hard and then does it again just to watch the way you jump. “Look at you, taking me so well. S’proud of you babe.”
You ignore the pet name, ass on fire and too close to cumming for the fifth time to argue with him over it.His hands grip your hips, pulling you up and down on his cock. You twirled your hips, spelling your name out as you fucked him back, body aching from the intense fuck session.
It wasn’t long before you were grinding harder against Gojo’s pelvis and squirting on him again, fingers pressing into his shoulders as he fell over the edge with you. Pushing himself up and throwing his head back with a roar, legs stretching out as he pumped a thick load of cum into condom.
You move up and down as much as you can, helping him finish his orgasm before collapsing against his chest. Gojo wraps his long arms around you, cock still seated inside you as you both fight to breathe, sweaty bodies sticking together, eyes droopy with exhaustion.
What a fucking night.
You would one hundred percent be fucking him again, even if it was just until you found someone you could tolerate outside of the bedroom. As for now, Gojo was the only one that could tame the fire inside of you and fuck did you hate to admit that.
You can feel his heart beating against your own, his hand rubbing up and down spine, lips kissing the side of your head. As reality comes back to you, you freeze before pushing yourself off him and laying next to him on the bed.
You ignore the hurt look on his face.
“Wanna shower with me?” Gojo asks, sitting up and pushing his hair from his forehead, looking at you over his shoulder with cloudy eyes.
“Seperate.” You don’t even look at him. Way to flip the script on him, he was usually the one ignoring girls after getting what he wanted.
He nods and goes through his drawer before finding a pair of sweatpants to put on, the obvious bulge of his still hard cock making your pulse jump.
He goes into the bathroom connected to his room and you hear the shower turn on before he comes back out and tosses you a towel. You can tell he’s upset but you ignore it. He wasn’t your man, it wasn't your problem.
After you wash your body and your hair, you find that he’s left you a pair of shorts and a shirt on the bed. When he comes back in the room and sees you dressed in his clothes, the size of it swallowing you, his heart damn near stops and you see the way he swallows the lump in his throat.
He clears his throat and smiles at you, slowly walking toward you and your body goes cold when he places his hand on your cheek and leans down to kiss your forehead.
That was the second time he broke your rule and the second time you didn’t correct him.
“Stay. I’ll bring you home in the morning, I can take the couch.”
You nod your head ok, lost for words and he simply nods and moves past you to take his shower.
Later that night you toss and turn before giving up and laying on your back, staring at the ceiling in the nearly dark room, drumming your fingers on your stomach. You sometimes had nights where you just couldn’t sleep no matter what you did and it seems tonight was one of those nights.
You’re still sore between your legs, a reminder that you went back on your word and let Gojo fuck you. You didn’t regret, even had plans on doing it again but that didn’t mean you weren’t angry with yourself. More so because you smelled just like him after using his soap.
He just knew all the right places to touch you, all the best ways to make you cum harder than you did the time before, his cock fitting so perfectly inside of you. It was a shame he had the personality of a walnut.
When you finally turn on your side to go to sleep, eyes burning from exhaustion, you feel the bed dip behind you and strong arms wrap around you.
You try to squirm out of Gojo’s grip but he tightens his arms around you, pulling you until your ass is flush against his hard cock, his chin tucked atop your head.
“Gojo.. we need to sleep, we have class tomorrow.”
“So I’m only Satoru when I fuck you? Wicked girl.” He leans down to kiss your neck and you let him, again, feeling your clit grow erect and that ache return.
“That’s your name isn’t it?” You huff out, moving your hips back against him.
He ignores you, hand going to your hip you pull you close as he grinds into you, slipping yours and his pants down. He quickly puts on a condom before pushing into you, bottoming out in one thrust, hand covering your mouth to keep you quiet.
“Gonna fuck you until you only know Satoru.. You know, my favorite number is actually six.”
You may have bitten off more than you could chew.
❦ lisa's note: sorry about the pledge scene 🥲 I wanted to show how frats are and needed you to truly hate them. promise I'll make up for it!
geto suguru is everyone’s first crush. having a crush on him is as hopeless as it is inevitable though your friends quickly disagree that the awe-struck, mouth gaping expression is a strictly you thing, and that he isn't as much of a campus celebrity as you believe he is. regardless, you're determined to put your inability to hold a conversation with him in the past. the solution is simple, you seek out his best friend. if geto suguru is everyone’s first crush (again, a completely objective statement), then gojo satoru is everyone’s first heartbreak.
pairing: frat&icehockey!gojo x reader
content: mdni, idiots in love, oblivious reader, baby’s first kiss + virginity taken by same person (satoru ><), suguru as the wingman, a little angst, mostly fluff + crack !! titjob, a little spitting, p in v, degrading, oral, fingering handjob etc etc 37k+
note: happy belated national arabian horse day! this was meant to come out on the 19th but life got in the way... regardless of the day hit up a friend and start beating a dead horse to celebrate!
Geto Suguru is everyone’s first crush.
Your friends insist you’re seeing him through some delusional rose-tinted lens and that he is, in fact, not as much of a campus celebrity as you believe him to be. You reject that notion. One look at him from across the room, other party goers be damned, is all it takes to confirm what you already know.
Geto laughs at something one of his friends says, tipping forward slightly as the alcohol softens his movements. You catch the tail ends of his laughter through the thumping bass, the glint of light reflected off his lip piercings when he smiles wide, his hand running through his untied black hair.
It would be as easy as walking up and saying hi to start a conversation. It would be as easy as smiling for him to turn his head and grace you with a smile of his own.
Oh, what you would give to be bathed in his gaze, for that pretty smile to widen at the sight of you. He’d spot you through the crowd, you’d tuck your hair shyly behind your ear and he’d politely excuse himself from his conversation to walk over to introduce himself to this mysterious beauty from across the room.
Shoko makes a noise like she’s strangling herself but when you turn to save her, she’s staring at your face. “Do you have any idea what you look like right now?”
“What’s wrong? Did I smudge my liner?”
You pull out your phone to check your makeup using the reflection but between the flashing lights and someone’s elbow jutting from your peripheral, you’re only eighty percent sure you don’t look a mess.
Considering you dragged your roommate out to this party last minute, Shoko sips her drink with commendable patience. “Even if you did, that would be the least of your worries. Look, you really don’t have to overthink this. We didn’t just spend all night planning this for you to end up weirding him out with that look in your eye.”
“Shit, that was the rehearsed deer look I was talking about!"
“Rehearsed how?"
You decisively ignore her. “I just want to do this right."
Her eyes soften slightly. She’s always been weak to your woes. “You will. He’ll love you. If you don’t believe in yourself, believe in me. I promise you, I’ve known this guy for years and you’re exactly the type of person he just eats up.”
You think of all your attempts to enter Geto’s world. There's just something mystifying about him, some kind of aura he emits that has you tripping over your tongue and freezing at the worst moments. Your words become stilted, your humour and wit abandoned at every crucial moment, causing you to simultaneously dread talking to him as much as you wished for it.
Shoko turns you to face her, eyes steady in a way yours isn’t. “Are you ready?"
You let out a slow breath and attempt to mimic her determination with a single nod.
“Then go find him.”
When you hesitate to even take a single step forward, Shoko gives you a push and then you’re off, legs moving without another thought. The crowd swallows you, bodies brushing past and jolting your shoulders, knocking you here and there. But none of that matters. Not when your heart is already set. Not when determination is the one thing keeping you upright, guiding you closer and closer to the boy who somehow makes a packed, sweaty houseparty fade into background noise
For too long, you’ve let this intoxicating feeling linger, letting it settle deep in your chest, almost convincing yourself that watching from the sidelines was enough. As if anything short of his eyes on you, perhaps even his lips on yours, could quiet the restless longing twisting in your heart. Limerence is what Shoko diagnoses you with, but the word feels too small for the intensity that surges through you every time his name crosses your mind.
Geto appears like a beacon before you, the crowds having finally parted enough for you to catch a good look. The party music transitions to an angelic choir but admitting that is basically affirming Shoko’s concerns that your infatuation is unhealthy, so you quickly refocus. Your heart clenches, pounds against your ribcage, and you only hope the dim lighting will hide the warmth spreading across your cheeks. He’s right there, right within reach. All you have to do is say his name.
All you have to do is make him see you.
You take a step forward, mumble an apology to the girl you bumped shoulders with, take another step towards where he’s laughing with a friend—then veer sharply to the right and slip into the kitchen.
If talking to Geto were really as easy as saying hi, you would have done it months ago.
The kitchen is quieter, the bass reduced to a distant, muffled thump and you can finally breathe as the crowd thins. There’s still chatter though significantly more bearable and your eyes fall onto the small cluster of boys within, standing in the near dark.
Your feet instinctively slow but Shoko’s voice in your head tells you that you’ve done too much to stop now and with a deep breath, you step beyond the threshold.
One by one, the group takes notice of you, their rambunctious laughter quietening into soft chuckles as heads pop up to look. It’s not strange for someone to enter the kitchen at a party so the most you get is a head nod in greeting before they return to their conversation.
You reach for a red cup and then for a jug of some mysterious jungle juice.
Unfortunately, the jug sits behind one of the boys. Even worse, it sits behind who you’re really here at the party looking for.
Leaning lazily against the counter and nursing a red solo cup of something strong no doubt, stands Gojo, Geto’s best friend.
If Geto Suguru is everyone’s first crush (again, a completely objective statement), then Gojo Satoru is everyone’s first heartbreak.
You can feel the burn of Gojo’s stare as you get close enough to lift the jug and pour, hands trembling slightly. Before you can help yourself, you steal glances from the side of your eye, landing squarely on his shirt specifically at the crude letting that reads ‘Two Seater’, arrows pointing abashedly toward both his crotch and his face.
You look back up immediately. You don’t want to know.
The punch sloshes into your cup, some of it missing due to your shaky hands and you don’t notice until a sticky trickle runs over your fingers. You hastily stop pouring and lick at the mess.
Before you can figure out how to announce your presence, there’s a rush of footsteps and another frat boy appears. Hikari, you think his name was, stands by the kitchen entrance, hair slightly disheveled from his usual style, loud and demanding as he’s always been.
“Hey!” he calls, scanning the room. “You guys need to come see this."
A chorus of half-drunk “what?” and “see what?” answers him like a herd of seagulls.
“In the living room,” he says. “There's two people on the floor and—” He stops, glancing over his shoulder like the situation might escape him if he looks away for too long. “Just hurry up!"
His vague words cause curiousity to spread faster than wildfire. The group of boys begin funnelling out of the kitchen, cups still in hand, voices rising with excitement.
“What is it?"
“Is it a fight?"
“Please tell me it’s a fight.”
“Did someone break something?”
Hikari doesn’t elaborate, instead turning and leaving the kitchen, confident the herd will follow. One friend, Choso if you remember correctly, looks back at Gojo who remains calmly drinking from his cup, still leaning against the counter beside you.
“Aren’t you coming, Satoru?”
Gojo shrugs, tipping back the last of his drink. “Nah. You go on ahead.”
Choso hesitates like he wants to ask why, then seems to think better of it.
“Suit yourself,” he mutters, already backing toward the door as someone behind him shoves past with a whoop.
Within seconds, the kitchen drains of bodies.
You’re deathly aware of the warm presence beside you. You inhale deeply and turn, ready to get this over and done with only to find him shamelessly looking at you.
For a moment, the two of you just stare at each other, his expression unreadable as he looks you over before his face splits into a lazy grin. “Hey.”
“Hi,” you squeak, immediately reprimanding yourself at the awkward sound.
His smile only grows. “I didn’t expect to see you here. Are you looking for someone? Or maybe you missed the exit? It’s down the hall to your right.”
“That’s rude.” You cross your arms in an attempt to place distance between the two of you and to maintain a confidence you don’t feel. “I attend parties.”
Gojo huffs and you feel slightly offended. He straightens and steps closer, close enough that his cologne hits you—sharp, expensive, and entirely too much. “I don’t know about that. I’ve never seen you at one of these before.” His head tilts, regarding you. “How do you even know Sukuna?"
For a moment you blank, wondering why he was asking about Sukuna. It hits you then that this party must be his. “Ah. I came with Shoko.”
He hums. “That makes sense. Shoko always did have a habit of collecting strays."
“Excuse me?”
“Not a stray,” he amends lightly at your glare. “More like her lost puppy.”
"Just because you’ve only ever seen me when I’m with Shoko doesn’t mean I’m always with Shoko.”
“I was talking more about how you were holding onto her shirt in the crowds earlier. She didn’t bring a leash for you?"
“Don’t project your weird kinks onto me."
“Do you often spend time thinking about what weird kinks I might be into?” Thankfully, Gojo lets the topic go before you really do decide to throw it all away and walk out. “But alright, let’s say I believe you and you’re just here for the party. Why are you here in the kitchen, then?”
“What else do people come to parties for? I’m here to drink. And stuff.” You trail off, clearing your throat.
“Really?” He eyes your untouched cup. “Because that’s just juice. The good stuff’s over here."
He steps into your personal space to reach over you to grab a bottle from the top of the fridge and you’re face to face with the gross words on his top. He retracts his arm, bottle in hand, but doesn’t step back. “Want me to pour you one?”
You think back to the last time you let yourself drink under the unwise judgement of Shoko, and how you can only recall glimpses of light and the vague memory of a toilet bowl “It’s fine, I’ve already had a lot to drink."
“Right,” he says, in a tone that makes it clear he doesn’t believe you for a second.
You watch as Gojo pours himself another drink, sipping leisurely, pointedly ignoring the way you’re staring.
Gojo isn’t exactly a stranger, but it’s an overestimation to call him your friend. In truth, he’s Shoko's friend—which means she occasionally drags him back to your shared dorm before disappearing to do whatever it is best friends do. You catch glimpses of him in passing, fleeting and inconsequential, never quite crossing into ‘introduce-yourself’ territory. Why would he? He’s the kind of guy who turns heads without trying, long-limbed, effortlessly confident, wearing the grin of someone who’s never been told no in his life.
Where Geto is soft-spoken and warm, guiding you through conversation with patient smiles and gentle ease, Gojo is loud and vibrant and reckless. There's a challenge in his eyes, a knowing smirk on his lips, like the world is perpetually entertaining and he’s always in on the joke.
You, on the other hand, are about as normal as it gets.
When the silence draws into something a little less casual and far more awkward, you clear your throat. “I’m Y/N by the way."
“I know who you are.”
“You do?”
“Shoko’s roommate, right? We’ve seen each other before. She’s mentioned you too.” He offers a hand, eyes holding yours like he knows you’ll pull away with anything less. “I’m Gojo. It’s nice to finally meet you.”
You go to echo his words, that of course you knew he was the Gojo Satoru but hesitate, settling instead for shaking his hand. His grip is warm and solid, carrying none of the jitteriness you feel. Hell, maybe you should have accepted a drink after all. What is this, a job interview? Why are you shaking his hand?
When you let go, you become painfully aware of how damp your palms are and curse yourself silently.
Gojo picks up on the silence and moves to lean against the counter, mimicking your earlier pose such that his arms are crossed over his chest, only emphasising his biceps in his sleeveless top. “So, Y/N. If you didn’t come in here for a drink, why are you here?”
His words cause you to still. This was it. Every moment in your dorm, huddled around the whiteboard usually reserved for studying, now littered with far less academic plans, Shoko chiming in her own thinkpieces occasionally. It all accumulated to this moment.
“I was looking for you actually. I wanted to talk to you.” Your voice is barely a whisper and humiliation slowly sinks in when he doesn’t answer immediately. Perhaps he didn’t hear you considering you’re speaking to your shoes.
When you finally look up, there’s an unreadable expression on his face. Gojo slowly tracks his eyes up and down your figure. Finally, he straightens, head tilted slightly. “Talk to me? Alone?"
You nod, and his face breaks into a broad grin.
“I wasn’t expecting that. Not that I hate it,” he purrs, voice dropping into something smoother as he steps closer and curls a loose lock of your hair around his finger. “What did you want to talk about, princess?"
Your mind vaguely registers the gesture, feeling the dampness of your palms once again. “I don’t really want to say here."
His fingers still, your hair wrapped around it. “Oh?"
You wonder what that look in his eyes meant. “Could we go upstairs?”
Gojo cocks his head, smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. His brows knit slightly, but his eyes gleam with amusement as he releases your hair, the strand falling back into place in a soft wave. “You do know I’m Shoko’s friend, right? And you’re her best friend?”
“Why does that matter?”
“Seriously? You don’t think it’ll be awkward?”
Awkward? You blink, trying to make sense of his words. Perhaps Gojo and Shoko had argued recently. Maybe he didn’t want her catching sight of the two of you together else it put you in an awkward position. He’s more considerate than you expected.
“It doesn’t have anything to do with her,” you say carefully. “Whether you or I are friends with Shoko—it doesn’t matter to me. I just want to talk to you.” You smile in satisfaction, relaxing a little at his kindness.
Gojo suddenly laughs, brushing a hand through his hair as he throws his head back like you’ve said the funniest thing. When he looks back down at you, his eyes are shining. “That’s what I’m saying! But every time I joke about it to Shoko, she goes all crazy on me. Looks like we have a lot in common, huh? I guess that makes us compatible.”
You continue to smile, the corners of your lips wavering a little in uncertainty. You’re not entirely sure what he means by that but considering you’re about to ask him for a favour, you appreciate his good mood.
“Well, alright,” he says at last, taking your hand. “I’d love to hear you out. Lead the way.”
Ignoring the little flip of nerves your stomach does as you hold his hand (perhaps he felt too drunk to climb the stairs alone?), you turn and lead him back into the living room and up the stairs to the quieter rooms of the house. The hand holding serves another purpose, you realise, as you weave through the crowds of people and he would surely have lost you had you not held on tighter, practically dragging him onward.
You feel a tug before your feet can even touch the second floor, like he’s suddenly become immovable. Before you can turn and check on him, you feel the warmth of his chest against your back, his hand slipping from yours to settle at your waist. You’re pulled to a stop, his breath now brushing against your ear, his hair tickling the side of your face. You’re certain he’s leaning over you despite being a step lower, and the faint scent of alcohol and sandalwood fills your senses.
“I didn’t think you’d be so proactive,” he murmurs. You think he might have inhaled, slow and deliberate, but it’s hard to tell over the base vibrating through the floorboards and the frantic pounding of your heart. “What else are you hiding from me, hm?”
He reaches for your hand and turns you slightly so you can watch as he licks your fingers, tasting the sticky residue of your spilt juice. His blue eyes seem to sparkle, mesmerising in a way that makes you freeze. “You taste sweet.”
Your breath hitches and he must have heard because the hand on your waist tightens and pulls you against him, head leaning down to gently nip at your neck. Your stomach does that little flip again, this time accompanied with a hot flush that short-circuits your brain.
“Wait!”
He chuckles softly, lips ghosting over a soft spot that makes your knees tremble a little. “Don’t be nervous. You have me right where you want me.”
You freeze, heart hammering, fingers twitching. When his hand slips just barely beneath the hem of your top, the words tumble out of you in a rush.
“I like Geto!”
For a heartbeat, everything goes still, his hand, his lips, his breath. Gojo pauses, lips pulling back from your sweaty neck. In fact, his entire body jerks back, both feet returning to the step beneath you, hand leaving your waist to turn you to face him. His fingers find your chin to tilt your face down, eyes dark as they hold yours.
“What did you just say?”
You swallow, looking him in the eye. “I like Geto.”
He stares at you wordlessly for a few more moments before he frowns, letting go of you completely and stepping down one more step just for good measure. “What the fuck are you doing here with me then?"
You gesture frantically between yourselves, finding the answer quite simple. “To talk? That’s what I said earlier, didn’t I? I wasn’t—I wasn’t insinuating… I wasn’t trying to—you know?”
“You said you wanted to come with me upstairs.”
“Yeah?”
“Alone.”
“Right.”
His frown only deepens at your easy response. “You know how that sounds, right? To get a guy alone upstairs at a party?”
“It sounds like I wanted to talk to you privately?” You try again at his disbelieving expression. “The music was super loud. I didn’t think you’d be able to hear me downstairs and I had to ask you something important so I didn’t want to risk it.”
He lets out a huff, something short and breathy, lips quirked upwards like he finds something amusing, even as his eyes stay locked on you, unmoving. “You’re kidding me, right?”
You hold out your hands as if to say, ‘What can you do?’.
Gojo groans, dragging a hand down his face. “Figures this was too good to be true.” His hand drops from his eyes to cover his mouth as he continues to stare at you. “Nothing about that situation implied you just wanted to talk. And about Suguru, of all things? Seriously, he’s being a cockblock and he isn’t even here.”
“What was that?”
“Forget it.” He drops his hand. “I’m leaving.”
You quickly hold onto his arm before he can completely turn. “Wait!”
Maybe it’s the desperation in your voice, maybe it’s your iron-clad grip on his bicep but he doesn’t attempt to pull away. Instead, he looks back and wrinkles his nose at you, a strangely childish gesture.
“I’m not in the mood to just talk. Not anymore.”
“Come on, please? There’s no one else I can ask!”
“I don’t see how that’s my problem.”
“If you could just please, out of the kindness of your heart, hear me out I would seriously appreciate it!”
He doesn’t budge.
“I won’t tell anyone I rejected you!”
He frowns. “First of all, you didn’t reject me because it was a misunderstanding. Second of all, are you really in a position to blackmail me right now?”
“I won’t tell Shoko you were the reason her favourite candle knocked over and singed a bit of her rug.”
His frown only deepens. Blackmail, you think, is surprisingly effective. “Hold on, how do you even know that?”
“What do you mean? I was literally right there.”
Gojo lets out a deep, long groan. He wriggles out of your hold, sending you a glare. “You know, you really suck at asking for help.”
“You don’t have to agree to helping me just yet. Just at least give me a chance to explain. We’re already here, aren’t we?”
“Yeah, well, I had other plans when we got up here that didn't involve just talking.”
You remind yourself to be patient. Again, you were the one asking for a favour, he’s the only one that can help you with your dilemma, you need him. Don’t call him a disgusting freak and walk away.
Clapping your hands together, you muster your best pleading look and send it his way. “Please, Gojo.”
You’re not really sure what broke through his defenses. For your own ego, you decide it must be because of your puppy dog eyes because he lets out a sigh and gives a reluctant nod.
“Go to the room to the right of the stairs.”
You bite back the instinct to cheer. Halfway through turning around, you look over your shoulder. “You’re coming too, right?”
“Just get up there before I change my mind.”
Wondering if souring his mood like this would backfire on you, you quickly hop up the remaining steps and head to the mentioned room just in case he really does change his mind. It would be beneficial to appease him before you ask for a crazy favour, after all. Therefore, you don’t even try to eavesdrop as Gojo continues to mumble to himself as he follows behind, worrying that somehow he might hear and turn around.
When you both reach the room, he closes the door and leans against it, arms crossed over his chest and expression flat in a way that feels very un-Gojo. You’re suddenly struck by the unfairness of it, of how someone with such a careless, teasing exterior can also appear so unreadable when he wants to.
“Five minutes.”
You clear the irrelevant thoughts from your head. “Excuse me?”
“You have five minutes before I’m going back down.”
You take a deep breath. This is it, no backing out now. “Okay. I need your help.”
He huffs, unamused. “So you’ve said. But with what exactly? Calculus? Because spoiler, I’ve been drinking.”
“With Geto.”
You watch in real time as the connection in his brain is made. He straightens off the door slightly. “Wait. Suguru? You want help with Suguru? What kind of help? Love help? You want love help with Suguru?”
Every word from his mouth is like a bullet to your dignity. Through gritted teeth, you hiss, “Yes. Can you be any louder?”
“I can try,” He says with a hint of humour. The smirk returns to his face and a feeling of foreboding looms over you. “This is what you wanted to get me alone to say?”
“Look, I needed someone who’s close with him and you’re–”
“Close? Please, I’m his best friend. I’m practically his wife.”
“Oh. So that makes us competition?”
He wrinkles his nose and looks you up and down. “You want me to help you get him.”
You nod.
“You want to confess to him.”
“Obviously.”
“Date him?”
“That’s the goal."
“Sleep with him?”
You give him a look so incredulous that he laughs, short and amused. “If you want advice just hit up reddit. If you want him to like you back then an etsy witch has you covered for five dollars. I don’t see why you have to bother me.”
“Because,” you say slowly. “He’s surrounded by people. He doesn’t even know me. I need all of that, the advice, the reciprocation, and I need someone who can get me close enough to him where he can notice me. And I feel like getting an Etsy witch to manipulate his dreams to include me would cost more than five dollars. And I’m broke. And I’m kind of bad with guys.”
“So, what? You want me to introduce you to him?”
“Sure. And maybe tell me what he likes?"
Gojo looks you up and down again. He leans back against the door but this time, there’s something smug and arrogant about his posture, eyes lazy as he takes up as much space as he can. “You’re not even his type.”
“That’s fine, I’m flexible.”
“That’s something you say at a job interview, not when you’re trying to get a boyfriend.”
“Just shows that I have an adaptable personality.”
“He just came out of a 2 year relationship,” he shoots back.
“I accept and embrace his past.”
“He has a habit of leaving his jackets on the arm rest of couches.”
“I have hands, I can put them away.”
“Where’s your self-respect?”
“With him. I’ll get it back after I get with him.”
Gojo huffs. “He doesn’t even know you.”
“That’s why I’m asking you for help.”
“You know, I think I liked you better when you were just a shy little thing stumbling over your words.”
Again, you can only shrug.
When he only frowns, you decide to use your hidden ace. Before he can open his mouth and surely reject you, you beat him to it, voice overlapping his.
“I’ll tutor you!”
His eyes narrow and when he doesn’t say anything else, you push on.
“I know you’re aiming for that sports scholarship to study abroad next year.”
“How do you even know about that?” He catches on quick with a groan. “Shoko.”
You nod. “And I know that you’re looking for someone to tutor you because you need to get good grades to get accepted. If you help me with this, I promise I can definitely bring your grades up. We both benefit!”
Gojo stares at you like you’ve just grown a second head and you think you’ve lost him when his lips twitch. Then, almost traitorously, one corner lifts higher.
“You,” he says slowly, pointing at you like he’s identifying a rare species, “Are trying to bribe me. You’re trying to bribe me because you can’t get game by yourself.”
“It's not a bribe,” you say stiffly. “I'm just saying there’s something in it for the both of us.”
“It’s a bribe,” he repeats, delighted now. “Holy shit, Shoko's roommate is bribing me. How desperate can you get?”
“I’m offering to give you academic support!”
“With strings attached.”
“Yes,” you sigh. "That's usually how deals work.”
He grins, wide and boyish and every bit infuriating as you’ve ever known him. “You think I can't get a tutor without helping you bag my best friend?”
“Well, you haven’t yet.”
“That's because I don't need one.”
“Right. So I should just forget all the times Shoko has ranted to me about how you keep asking her for help?”
“You know, this conversation has really enlightened me on who my real friends are.” His gaze slides back to you, assessing. “And you’re confident you can help me?”
You straighten your shoulders and give a solemn nod. “I’ve fixed worse than you.”
He studies you, eyes tracking your features down to your shoes and you fight the urge to squirm self consciously. He seems to be recalibrating you, seeing you not as Shoko’s tagalong but as an actual person making a very earnest, albeit very ridiculous, request.
Finally, he sighs, long and dramatic.
“Well, at least you have one thing going for you. Suguru eats this kind of stuff up, hardworking, stubborn, a little pathetic—”
“Hey.”
“—in a cute pet way,” he amends smoothly. “Relax.”
You glare at him anyway but the rational part of your brain reminds you that you need this. He grins back, entirely unrepentant.
“Fine,” he continues, raising a finger, “If I do this, we’re doing it my way. That means we need rules.”
You fight the urge to jump up and down in joy. “I was going to suggest that anyway! How about this, we—”
“Rule one,” he says, face settling into something serious. “You can’t fall in love with me.”
Unable to help yourself, you burst out laughing. “Trust me, that’s not going to be an issue. You're definitely not my type.”
At your laugh he smiles though it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Rule two, no complaining. Keep that mouth in check, sweets.”
You giggle. “What's wrong, fragile ego?”
He raises an eyebrow and you mumble irritated curses under your breath. “Sorry.”
“Rule three, if Suguru ends up falling head over heels for you, you owe me big.”
“How big?”
His eyes flick down to your mouth again, then back up, smirk slow and dangerous. “I’ll decide later.”
You catch the movement and swallow, feeling none of the humour from earlier. “Okay, deal. Then, rule four, you take your studying seriously. I don't tutor people who don’t care.”
“I think between the two of us, I want to succeed the most so that’s a given. Any more rules, sweets?”
When you shake your head, he nods. “We’ll start tomorrow.”
“Not today? I mean he’s literally right here,” You quickly clarify. “Not a complaint, just a question!”
“I came here to get drunk and have a good time. I’m going to need at least three drinks to get me back there so be a good girl and wait. I’ll text you tomorrow if you really can’t be patient. Unless, you want to back out already?”
You straighten your shoulders, trying to match his confidence. “I’m not backing out! I just want to make sure you’re not going to ditch me. This isn’t really a normal request.”
“Oh, so you know?”
You roll your eyes at him but have the decency to at least look bashful.
“Tomorrow,” he repeats then jerks his chin toward the door. “Go on, sweets. Before I sober up and regain some self-respect.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“A complaint?”
You bite your lip. “A suggestion.”
“Here’s a real suggestion,” he starts, turning around to open the door. Standing in the doorframe, he gives you one last look. “Next time you ask a guy to go upstairs with you at a party, maybe start with the part about not wanting to make out.”
Your face gets hot instantly, mouth opening to splutter, “I didn’t mean anything by it!”
But he doesn’t stay to hear the end of it, rejoining the masses downstairs without another word. He lifts his hand once as a goodbye and then he’s gone, leaving you alone in the room, half mortified, half exhilarated. Unwilling to give him any sense of victory with his last words, you head back downstairs and find Shoko to tell her the results of the first step of your plan.
It’s a struggle pushing through the thick waves of people but you finally find your roommate off to the side, musing herself in a conversation with someone you don’t recognise.
Instinctively, your eyes search for Geto if only to recall what you’re doing this for. Standing beside him, arm swung over his shoulder is Gojo, already sipping from a cup and laughing into the conversation with a natural ease that reminds you of the gap between who you were and who he is. As if sensing your gaze, he looks over and you flinch as if burnt. Something stirs in your gut and you wonder if your little plan to get with Geto has taken a slightly unpredictable turn.
“You okay?” Shoko asks, noticing your fluster.
You nod, looking away quickly. “Of course. All going to plan, you know?”
“Then I guess you’re up to step two.”
“Right,” Your eyes drift back to Gojo and find him looking at you over the rim of his cup. The feeling in your stomach lurches. “Step two.”
Step two begins with Gojo texting you at the ass crack of dawn. You blink the sleep from your eyes, squinting at the bright light of your screen in mild disbelief and annoyance as he tells you to pull up to his 9am lecture. Despite the lingering feeling that you’ve bitten off more than you can chew, you understand that this is necessary.
You know for a fact that you have no classes today and therefore no reason to make the trek to university. a whole day,just gone and tasked with the impossible task of putting up with that infuriating player.
No, you reprimand yourself as you text back your agreement. No complaining. Do it for him, do it for Geto. With those words repeating in your head like a mantra, you pull yourself together and out of bed to get to campus.
It would be helpful, after all, to see where his studies were at if you were going to take this tutoring business seriously.
You get a coffee at the station to combat your sleepiness and the chill of a winter morning before hesitating and getting another. With two coffees, one in each hand, you wait outside his lecture room until the doors swing open.
Spotting him wouldn’t be too hard, you muse, considering Gojo is impossible to miss.
And then, you see him.
His unmistakable frame, hair a messy white halo catching the late morning sun, strides into view. He's mid conversation as he steps out, animated, half-grinning, and you find yourself understanding why so many girls lose their minds over him.
“Gojo!” You call out, voice slightly drowned out by the chatter all around.
You’re about to give him a piece of your mind, him having been the reason why you kept to your phone all of last night like a wife anticipating the return of her war husband, when you freeze. Because when Gojo turns, your mind barely registering the amused look he gives you, the person he was talking to comes into view.
Because of course, where there’s Gojo there is Geto, the yin to his yang.
You weren’t ready for both of them.
Noticing your sudden stiffness, Gojo looks beside him and scoffs. Unimpressed, he starts walking over. You panic, attempting to smooth out your clothes and fix up your appearance though your hands are full of coffee so you end up doing an awkward wiggle.
“Look at you,” Gojo starts when he’s close enough. “Loitering outside my class like a fan. Maybe this is more urgent than I thought, not because you like Suguru but because you really need your self-respect back.”
You open your mouth to respond, to clarify, to deny, to just say something, but Geto catches up beside him and suddenly every possible word tangles up in your throat.
“Oh. Hey,” Geto says, recognition flickering across his face. “You’re Y/N, right?”
You blink, knees feeling weak and mind in shambles that he even knew your name let alone match it to your face. “Uh, yeah! That’s me!”
He smiles, soft and easy, all the charm you’ve seen him use on others now directed to you. “I thought so. You’re in one of Shoko’s tutorials, no? I think I remember her mentioning you.”
“I’m her roommate, actually.” You try for a smile and pray it doesn’t give off the extent of your adoration towards him.
“Right, that would be it. I’m Geto.”
You nod mutely, wishing your brain would reboot to say something, anything that doesn’t make you sound like you’ve never spoken to a human before. Geto, he says, like you didn’t already know his name, like he wasn’t one of the most known people on campus. Still, the fact that he so humbly introduced himself only proves his humility and your heart gives a quiver.
This moment was everything you’ve ever fantasied. His eyes on you, giving you that pretty smile you’ve only seen directed at others. You could have stood there and basked in his attention until the end of time if Gojo didn’t suddenly clap Geto’s shoulder and butt in.
“Great, so glad you’re both acquainted,” he says, ignoring your glare and throwing an arm around your shoulder to pull you into his side. “But as much as I’d love to keep standing here and soak in this riveting small talk, I think my very dedicated super fan here needs me for something.”
You shoot him a look. “I am not your super fan.”
“No? And is that not my coffee?”
You look down at your hands as if only remembering now what you were holding. Biting back a remark, you thrust out a coffee. “It is.”
He grins, taking it and letting his fingers brush against yours. “Thought so.”
Geto looks between the two of you. “Oh, I see how it is."
Your eyes fling back to him at the same time Gojo exclaims, “What?”
“Woah, did I touch a nerve there or something?” Geto’s smile quickly turns smug. He returns Gojo’s earlier gesture and thumps him hard on the back twice. “I get it. I’ll get out of your hair then. Be gentle with him, Y/N. He’s actually a pretty sensitive guy.”
It takes you a while to process his words so Gojo reacts first.
“Dude, I’m telling you it’s not like that.”
“Sure,” Geto says in a tone that very much suggests he isn’t convinced at all. “Guess I’ll see you around, yeah? Later, Satoru.”
You only realise seconds after he leaves that you hadn’t said goodbye. In fact, after Gojo’s interruption, you hadn’t managed to say anything more to Geto.
“Huh,” Gojo muses, breaking the silence. “You get like that around him?”
You groan and find the lump in your throat gone. “I stood there like an idiot!”
“You did.”
“He probably thinks I’m a freak!”
“Probably.”
“And you!” You look up to glare at him. “You didn’t have to make it sound so weird!”
“So now it’s suddenly my fault?”
“You caught me off guard by calling me your super fan!”
“Right, like that was the weirdest part of the conversation,” he shoots back, lips curled in dry amusement. “That, and not the super sour face you were making at him. Like a grimace.” He mimics your expression and you properly grimace this time, hoping against all odds that that was not the face you had been making at the person you were actually a super fan for.
Deciding you will only lose if you continue to defend yourself, you choose to change the subject. “You should have told me he’d be here.”
“You never asked. Besides, is it my fault if you didn’t prepare for that to happen?”
You sulkingly mumble a yes and he wags his finger at you, tutting disapprovingly.
“No complaining, remember? Come on, let’s go. We have things to talk about.”
You sigh though relent to fall into step beside him, fingers curling around your own coffee as the crowd thins around you. Now that Geto is gone, the world feels marginally more comfortable, less bright, less sharp, but also less mortifying.
You remember your stuttering self a few minutes ago.
Still a little mortifying but now bearable.
Gojo takes a long sip of his coffee, then glances sideways at you over the rim. “For future reference, I don't like coffee.”
You dig your elbow into his side and he winces but doesn’t remove his arm around your shoulder.
“Where are we going? I was thinking we could go to the library and look over your courses. That way I can pinpoint your weakness and where to target first. We only have a few months into graduation so we’re in a bit of a time crunch but I'm positive I can raise your grades from whatever they may be to… what?”
You trail off when you find Gojo looking down at you in disbelief. He shrugs when your eyes meet and shrugs, though the gesture is a little awkward with his arm over your shoulders.
“I just didn’t think you were serious about the whole tutoring thing.”
“I keep to my promises, Gojo,” you pause. “And I hope you will too.”
He reaches over with his free hand to ruffle your hair, ignoring your squeak. “Desperation isn’t a good look on you, sweets. Relax, relax, I'll get you two together. Trust me.”
You grumble but don’t voice your suspicions, instead letting him drag you in a certain direction. You perk up when you don’t immediately recognise your surroundings.
“Where are we going?”
“I get it, you want to check me out. I'm just taking us somewhere where that can happen.”
“Your studies, not you,” you clarify.
“Yeah, and my studies are mine so you’re checking me out.”
You grimace and he chuckles, turning you around a corner. “The library is too quiet so we’re going back to my place.”
You stop abruptly.
“Your place?”
“Yeah.”
“Your place?”
Gojo cocks his head as if listening to something in the distance. “Did you just hear that echo too?”
“Forgetting the fact that we should clearly just go to the library or somewhere on campus at least, I thought you lived in Sig Kap?”
“Right you are. Wow, I'm really starting to see why you’re the perfect choice as a tutor.”
“But you just said we’re going to your place.”
“Nothing gets past you.”
“Your place as in the Sig Kap house.”
“Look at you go.”
You stare at his side profile, waiting for a punchline that won’t come.
“Gojo.”
“Yeah?”
“I am not going to your frat house.”
“What happened to not complaining? That was the first rule and you’re already breaking it, sweets. I'm starting to dread this whole arrangement,” he continues to tease, looking ever so peaceful.
“I'm sorry, I don't know what you think I'm about but I wouldn't willingly walk into a den full of men named things like Chad. Do you even have furniture?”
“I only had a cot for the majority of first year but now I've upgraded to a mattress on the floor.”
“Great. Let's end this here.”
Gojo hooks his finger in your belt hoop before you can walk away. “First of all, we don’t have a Chad. We do have a Kyle though.”
“You're not doing yourself any favours.”
“Second,” he continues on, pulling you back towards him with his finger. “It’s ten in the morning. Half of them are in class and the other half are probably legally dead.”
You stand your ground. “Library.”
“Sig Kap.”
“Library.”
“Sig Kap.”
“Gojo.”
He leans in suddenly, close enough that you can see the faint crease at the corner of his eyes from squinting in the sun.
“You want Suguru, right?”
Your breath catches and despite yourself, you hear him out. “So? How is that relevant?”
“Because,” he says mildly like he’s talking to a little kid. “Sig Kap is where Suguru hangs out. He's my best friend, you know he’s my best friend that’s why you came to me. Why wouldn’t he be over at mine all the time? If you can’t handle coming over now how are you ever going to fuck him?”
“I am not—” you choke, voice pitching before forcefully lowering your voice when you notice people looking at you. “That is not— I haven't even—”
Gojo hums, watching you with a victorious grin. “So you don’t want to sleep with him?”
You make a startled noise and start walking in a random direction, eager to leave him behind. Life, however, is full of disappointments considering he follows, his arm draping over your shoulder once more.
“So where are we going?”
You give in. “Sig Kap.”
“Wrong way, sweets.”
You groan but follow as he steers you in the opposite direction.
Gojo chatters in your ear the entire walk to where the frat houses are situated on campus, about how his least favourite professor is out to get him, about someone in his frat who set off the fire alarm this morning, about the latest philosophical debate holding the frat hostage: whether cereal is a soup or not. It's a steady stream of nonsense, ridiculous but unbroken because at least he wasn’t talking to you so much as at you.
At some point, you stop responding entirely.
Somehow, his mere presence is enough to change your opinion and you actually feel relief when you finally see the house before you. Sig Kap stands broad and sunlit, paint only mildly chipped, windows open to let in the winter air. There's a couple bikes leaning against the porch railing and there’s an abandoned hoodie on the outdoor chairs.
“Oh thank god,” you mumble under your breath when he finally stops talking.
He lets you go to jog up the steps, opening the door to what you’re positive is about to be an overstimulating nightmare.
Warm air hits you first, carrying the scene of coffee and something oily. Sunlight stretches across worn hardboard floors until Gojo closes the door behind you and the hallway dims. A TV murmurs somewhere deeper into the house and there’s a loud conversation happening upstairs.
“You said everyone would be either in class or dead!” you hiss.
“It was an exaggeration,” he says lightly. "Don't worry, everyone’s harmless. But if you’re worried, you can just stick close to me.”
You ignore his cocky grin and shove him to get him walking. Unfortunately, getting to the stairs meant walking past the living room and you know things won’t be as harmless as he says when a voice calls out.
“Yo!”
Gojo pauses and steps back to poke his head into the living room. “Morning.”
You awkwardly step back to let him, pushing you into view too.
Two heads snap toward you at once. One of them is sprawled across the couch, blanket half-tangled around his legs and a bowl of popcorn balances on his stomach. The other is slouched in an armchair, controller in hand, eyes bloodshot and face pale as if he was still hungover. Considering the state of the party last night, you don’t doubt that he might be. Speaking of the party, you recognise the one on the left as Hikari.
“You’re bringing a girl back in broad daylight?” The controller guy says, no tact whatsoever.
Hikari snaps his fingers in recognition. “Hey, you’re the girl at the party.”
“Damn, back for more?”
Hikari shoves controller guy’s head down at the crude comment.
“She's here to save my GPA,” Gojo explains. “So keep it down, yeah?”
“That's what we should be saying to you,” controller guy smirks.
Unfortunately, Gojo smirks back. “You know they can’t help it. I'm just too good.”
He guides you back towards the stairs as the boys in the living room chuckle, and when you finally think of something to say you’re already standing in the middle of his room. By then, there’s another something to take up your mind and computing power.
Despite the relatively large floor plan, Gojo has decided to use none of it. True to his words, there’s a mattress lying on the floor against one wall, blanket a mess and a single pillow sitting flat at the top. A stack of old textbooks make up a bedside table where there’s a cute small lamp. On the other side sits a couch and a giant flat screen in front of it at a distance that would make optometrists frown.
Maybe that’s why Gojo is sometimes seen wearing sunglasses indoors. Maybe they’re prescription.
“This is what you bring girls back to?”
Gojo drops his bag on the floor and flops down onto the couch, patting the cushion beside him. “Come sit.”
You eye the seat in disdain.
“What's with the look?”
“Is that even sanitary?”
He snorts. “Worried you’ll get cooties or something? Relax, I rarely bring anyone back. Usually I go to the girls’ place for that kind of stuff. Fucking on a mattress is pretty harsh on the back, you know. You’re the first girl I've brought back in a while. Lucky you, right?”
You grimace but sit down gingerly. “Can you tell me what courses you’re doing?”
“What's the rush? Let's get to know each other better,” he says but he still reaches over to grab his laptop from his bag, opening it on his lap.
You can picture it so clearly, Gojo coming back from a long day of (skipping) classes to do his assignments and homework like this, slumped over his laptop on this surprisingly comfortable couch. The bare mattress on the floor might be a big contributing factor to his back pain, but you have no doubts that this routine wasn’t doing him any favours. “Here,” he places his laptop on your knees and leans back, pulling out his phone from his pocket. “You look.”
Considering his complete disregard of safety is not your issue, you don’t protest and quickly type in the college website. As if sensing this is not the right time, a prompt pops up to log in again.
“Password?” you ask, tilting the screen to him.
He barely looks up from his phone, one arm behind his head, the other typing away. “Sixeyes69 question mark exclamation mark.”
You pause and type it in. It goes through.
“What's the number?” He asks, disinterested.
You look on the screen. “67.”
He chuckles. “Nice.”
“Are you seriously okay with telling me your password like that?”
He shrugs, screenshotting the multi authenticator screen before hitting enter. The website in front of you loads and opens to his details.
“Tt’s not like there’s anything you can do with that. Are you planning to sneak in and do my assignments for me?”
Finding no fault in his words, you accept it and click through the tabs. Your brows quickly knit together as you read the contents.
“Gojo.”
“Mhm?”
“You’re missing three assignments in this class, you have a midterm for another in two weeks and you’re barely passing first year statistics.”
Gojo looks up at the ceiling in deep concentration before looking down with a smile. “Yeah, that sounds about right, why?”
“This is insane! I'm not a miracle worker!”
“Better find a lamp that grants wishes soon because your love life is on the line,” he points out. “That was the deal, you find a way to get me into that scholarship and I get you and my best friend together. It's not my fault you were weirdly confident and didn’t check to see where I was at before proposing that.”
Flabberghasted, you can only open and close your mouth like a fish. “Look, the midterm in two weeks, I can probably help with. The three assignments? You failing statistics?”
“Pretty sure I passed that last quiz. Maybe check again?”
“51 is just barely passing which is basically a fail.”
“Oh no, it seems like you can’t do this after all. Looks like the deal is over. Hey, by the way, since you’re already here, why don't we—” Gojo sits up and leans in, one hand on your thigh above his laptop.
“I demand another favour.”
He freezes. “You can’t just do that.”
“I can,” you square your shoulders and meet his eyes. “I did this statistics class during my first year so I still have my notes. I can easily alter them and give them to you and if you have any questions, we can meet up and I'll go through the questions with you. There's no way you can submit two of the three missed assessments as late but I can help you write the one that was due last week. There will be a mark reduction but I'll make sure it’s as good as can be. And, like I said, studying for the midterm is possible in two weeks.”
Gojo stares at you as if seeing you for the first time. When he finally moves, it’s only to remove his hand from your knee and slump back into his leather couch. “You’re insane.”
You wonder if he’s sulking.
“But,” you continue on. “If I help you with this then I can add to my condition. Besides, I made it too vague earlier and you’ve helped me see that. So thank you.”
He rolls his eyes. “Just tell me.”
You bite your lip. “Go on a practice date with me.”
He blinks at you, giving you that same incredulous look before bursting into a fit of laughter that does wonders for your ego.
“Hey.”
He keeps laughing, one hand resting on his chest.
“Hey!” You hit his arm and he finally cracks an eye open to look at you.
“You’re kidding,” he chuckles, struggling to catch his breath. “Gojo Satoru doesn’t do dates.”
“Don't refer to yourself in third person.” You smack his bicep one more time for good measure and because he’s weirdly solid under your touch. “It won’t actually be a date. I just need to know how dates work. I can't just go from zero to not-zero without practice!”
His laughter trails off though the smile remains on his face. He tilts his head to the side. “You’re at zero?”
You freeze, feeling like you’ve walked into a trap.
“Define zero.”
“Have you kissed anyone?”
You look away. “Define kissed.”
He laughs again, though mercifully shorter. “That's crazy. Next thing you know, you’re going to ask me to teach you how to—”
“Please!” you say quickly. “It won't be anything serious. I just need to know the mechanics, you know, how dates actually work. What you’re supposed to say, how you sit, when you pay, whether eye contact should be continuous or intermittent—”
“Jesus,” he mutters, scrubbing a hand over his face. “You’re actually a lost cause.”
“Well I've never done one before!” You clamp your mouth shut after, mortified at how loud you just got.
Gojo watches you for a long moment, the amusement still there though dimmed now by something closer to curiousity. Maybe even concern if you squint.
Silence stretches between you, warm sunlight pooling across the floor, distant house noise muffled beyond the door. He looks down at his laptop on your lap then back up to your face.
“...okay.”
Your heart stumbles and you inhale sharply. “Okay?”
“I’ll do it.”
“Really?” Relief overwhelms your system and your shoulders relax.
“Gojo Satoru doesn’t go back on his promises.” He straightens and places a hand over his heart, a mock solemn expression on his face. Before you can poke fun of his use of third person again, he continues. “Besides, I need to figure out where you stand. Let's go on a date tomorrow.”
“Eager much?”
He shrugs. “Rip the bandaid off. Besides, I have no other time this week, I have practice all of this week for the upcoming game.”
Though you were ready to disagree, you find yourself nodding. “Okay, tomorrow.”
“It's a date,” he says sweetly before clapping his hands together once loudly. “So, does that mean I'm off the hook for today? Steam is having this massive sale and I have money to spend.”
You snort. “What makes you think you’re free to go?”
“You got what you wanted,” he points out reasonably. “Practice date secured so mission accomplished, right? Seems like a natural stopping point and the Steam store is calling me.”
He reaches lazily toward the laptop. You smack his hand away without hesitation.
“Well hang up because you’re failing statistics and the submission box for that technical report is waiting for you. I'm afraid you’re going to have to reschedule.”
“You're kidding. I dragged you here and gave you nothing to prepare with, there’s no way you'll have anything to tutor me with.”
You stretch out your arms, fingers interlaced, and listen to the satisfying pop of your joints. “Watch me.”
Night has long since settled by the time you return to your dorm. Despite his perennial sulking throughout the entire tutoring session, lips jutted out when he isn’t whining, eyes drifting from the screen when you’re not giving him your full attention, he still offers to walk you back to the opposite side of the campus where the dorm houses are. Guiding him through the writing assignment was somewhat akin to extracting teeth from a little kid, but he’s surprisingly quiet when you’re talking and only chooses to complain when you’ve stopped.
And by the end of it, you’re proud to announce that he has 500 words on a once empty doc that was almost ready for submission.
Hey, you did mention before that you can’t create miracles.
Still, there’s something bright in his eyes when he reads through his own work, mumbling the words under his breath. So then, when you had reached down to pick up your tote bag and call it a day, he’s on his feet almost instantly, laptop snapping shut as he follows.“I’ll walk you,” he says, like it’s not even a suggestion.
The campus at night feels different, all those late nights in the library had taught you that. It’s quieter, softened at the edges and maybe it's placebo, maybe it isn’t, but the air feels fresher and time seems to slow. Streetlamps cast warm pools of light along the pathways, the winter air crisp enough to bite at your cheeks. Your breath fogs slightly as you walk, footsteps echoing in companionable rhythm.
For once, Gojo isn’t talking.
He makes the occasional comment, something about how dead campus feels after dark, how he hates early morning practices, how someone keeps taking his chocolate milk from the fridge, but for some reason you don’t find it so tolerable. Maybe it’s the way he’s saying it, slower and calm, nothing like before.
You steal a glance at him.
His hands are shoved into his jacket pockets, shoulders relaxed, expression softer than you’re used to seeing. Without the performative grin and constant chatter he looks less like the campus celebrity Everyone knows and more like he’s just some guy. Albeit, very attractive but you digress.
“You didn’t have to walk me,” you say into the silence that he hadn’t immediately rushed to fill after his last anecdote.
“I know.”
“Then why are you?”
He shrugs. “Just felt weird not to. Besides, it’s late out and your dorm is half a century away. I need you alive to fix my grades, remember?”
You give him a faint chuckle and look forward again.
A few more steps pass in silence, broken only by the shuffle of feet.
“Hey,” he says suddenly.
You look up, watching the light scatter over his side profile.
“Thanks.”
“For what?”
“For today.” He kicks at a pebble on the path, watching as it skitters ahead. “For not giving up on me after the first five minutes.”
You huff softly. “I said I'd help. And Y/N never goes back on her promises.”
He looks over at you and you both share a smile before his expression turns thoughtful. “Yeah, but people say stuff all the time.”
You study him. “Do they?”
He hums and doesn’t elaborate.
The dorm building comes into view ahead, lights glowing warmly through the windows. There's still a couple students drifting in and out, bundled in hoodies and coats and wearing slides, soft laughter spilling into the night.
You slow, suddenly aware that the walk is almost over. You turn to him so you can look at each other.
“You know, you’re not as hopeless as you think,” you say quietly. “I think you’ve just never pushed yourself to seriously try.”
He snorts. “Thanks, real inspirational.”
“I’m serious,” you protest but the corners of your lips quirk up.
He looks at you then, properly looks, eyes searching your face with a small frown. When he can’t find whatever he’s looking for, his brows relax.
“You really think I can pass?”
“Yes.”
Something in his shoulders loosens, tension easing away.
“Okay,” he breathes out. “Then, my grades are in your hands, teacher.”
You make a face. “I think I prefer sweets.”
He laughs and you turn to walk up to the entrance. The automatic doors remain stubbornly closed until you step into the sensor’s range, humming softly as they slide open. Warm air spills out, smelling faintly of old carpet and air freshener.
For some reason your feet slow.
“Hey, Y/N.”
You turn, looking at him as he stands just outside the warm lobby light, hands in his pocket, shoulders slightly hunched against the cold.
“Yeah?”
He hesitates.
“See you tomorrow."
You bite your lip and nod, repeating his words softly. Then, before you can do something stupid, you turn and walk into the building. The doors close with a soft thud, sealing you inside.
Through the glass, you watch him turn and head down the path, white hair catching the glow of the streetlights. And of course, he doesn’t look back.
Your reflection stares back at you instead, cheeks flushed from the cold, eyes a little too bright, heart still beating faster than it should.
Tomorrow, apparently, you’re going on a date, practice or not.
For some reason, Geto pops up in your mind and you tighten your hold on your tote bag, making your way up the stairs. The soft curve of his smile earlier this morning, the way he had said your name like it belonged in his mouth, or maybe that was just wistful thinking. But the warmth in his eyes that had nearly short-circuited your brain was most definitely real and you cling to the image.
Right, this is for him.
Your phone buzzes a little after you settle into bed that night, making you jolt. you roll onto your side and reach for your phone, pulling it free from your charger as you read through your notifications.
gojo: i made it back safe in case you were wondering ><
You get comfortable, tucking your doona under your chin as you type back, your phone the only light source in your dark room.
you: trust i wasn’t worried but thanks ig
gojo: who said anything about being worried?
also don’t flake on me tomorrow
i’m taking this mentorship very seriously so u better asw you: i won’t flake ik i’m already asking sm of u
gojo: oh u know do u?
so ure going to pay for our date tmrw?
you: it’s not a date
gojo: sure it isn’t
you: it’s just practice
gojo: i didn’t say it wasn’t
but if you admitted it was a real date i’d pay yk
you: please
like i’d actually want you to pay for my coffee
not a date, not real, don’t need u to pay for my drinks
gojo: ure a hard girl to please
you: if its from someone like you, its gonna be harder than just hard
try impossible
gojo: harder than hard?
you: ?
gojo: something feels wrong about that sentence for some reason
anyway
is the campus close for you or should we meet up in the city
you: the campus works for me
gojo: ure not just saying that to avoid the date allegations are you
you: no way
gojo: sure sweets i believe u
don’t wear anything boring
first impressions matter yk
you: oh my god stop pushing the date allegations
its just practice !!!!
gojo: okay and you can practice dressing up for me
for suguru
like for practice
you: ?
i know what u meant
but sure
as long as u do too theres no way im embarrassing myself by showing up overdressed if u show up in sweats and a hoodie
gojo: wouldn’t dream of it
see u saturday sweets
You stare at the nickname longer than you should.
Your fingers hover over the keyboard for a moment before moving.
you: goodnight gojo
The reply bubble appears then disappears before appearing again. Nothing comes of it as it disappears one more time and stays gone.
You swipe off the app and place your phone back on your bedside table, ignoring the pleasant buzz running through you.
You show up early like a super fan.
You’ve been sitting at the little corner table situated at the back of your favourite campus cafe for the past ten minutes now, stirring your drink just to look busy. The cafe hums around you with soft chatter, clinking spoons against teacups and ceramic against ceramic, a mellow playlist faintly playing in the background, but your nerves drown most of it out.
You’ve already gone through three mental checklists as you sit there, waiting. Your fingers curl around your empty cup, feeling the beads of water drip down your fingers and you really hope you won’t need to make an awkward break for the bathroom anytime soon considering he should be here about now.
You tell yourself you’re not nervous but you catch yourself glancing at the door every other second, heart jumping each time it swings open.
The bell chimes again and you look up with a start, eyes immediately locking onto Gojo as he saunters in, lifting his sunglasses so they rest on his head. He’s dressed casually, a white and blue jersey over a pair of blue baggy jeans, but his good looks mold the outfit into something appropriate for a date.
Gojo spots you at his first look around and grins, sliding into the seat across.
“Morning,” he greets, a wide smile on his face. His eyes flicker down once at your empty cup. “Did you wait long?”
“No, not at all!” You remember who you’re talking to and relax a little. “Actually, I got here fifteen minutes early. I guess I got a little anxious.”
“Well, you don’t need to be. You look nice,” he says, tone light. His eyes look you over once to make his words comprehensible and then one more time purely for the love of the game. “Trying to impress me?”
You scoff, trying to recover. “You told me to dress nice.”
“C’mon, sweets. Play along. We’re on a date, you know. Your next lines should be something like,” he suddenly tucks his elbow in, body curving to the side slightly, hand half closed and held delicately over his lips and chin. His eyelashes flutter over his cheek as he looks down and to the side, a faux shyness that makes you want to laugh. “‘Thank you, you look good too’.”
You let yourself laugh, shoulders relaxing. “What the fuck?”
“You give it a try. It always works in anime.”
“No way in hell,” you continue, laughing fading into occasional giggles as his gesture replays in your mind. “Besides, this is a practice date. I'll save that technique for the real deal, thank you very much.”
“And for practice, we’re going to pretend this is a real date.” He leans back into his seat, legs stretching out and bracketing yours under the table. His feet bump against yours lightly. “Let's give it another try. Did I make you wait long?”
You stir the straw inside your drink, pretending to be nonchalant, though your fingers twitch slightly against the glass. “Not long… I guess.” You try a mysterious act, hearing that guys like a woman with secrets. At least, that’s what Shoko told you though a small part of you wonders if you should be taking “how to seduce a guy 101” from a lesbian.
“‘I guess’?” he echoes, tilting his head. “That’s the best you can do? You’re supposed to be charming me, remember? At least try to make it look like I'm not coercing you here.”
“I don’t care if I charm you or not,” you say quickly, cheeks warming. “I’m here to learn and you’re here to teach me.”
He laughs, a low, easy sound that makes your chest tighten. “You know, I'm not exactly made of time. Do you know how many girls and guys would kill to be in your position right now?”
You resist the urge to roll your eyes though don’t stop yourself from making your voice dry. “Oh sure, let’s spend this entire date talking about all the competition I have.”
“We would need at least four more dates to cover it all.”
“I didn’t know getting into a relationship with you would be such an investment.” You snort. “If all five of our dates are just going to be you listing my competition, I'd rather stand you up now and save myself the time. And the money.”
“I did offer to pay for your drinks.” He grins at the back and forth, the sides of his shoes bumping into your ankles lightly. “That’s it, you’re getting into it.”
“For practice.”
“Sure, sweets. Practice. Speaking of,” he says, leaning forward just enough that the sunlight catches his hair. “You should call me Satoru. We’re on a date, remember? I can’t tell if you’re on a date with me or my dad if you call me Gojo.”
You grimace. “Calling you by your first name makes it too real.”
“It is real. That’s what you should tell yourself to get into this.” He juts out his lower lip, drawing his eyebrows inward. “Come on, sweets, let me hear you say my name.”
“When you say it like that, it makes me want to throw a drink in your face.”
“Just once, Y/N.”
You huff and roll your eyes. “Satoru.”
“Oh my god, a girl called me by my first name!” he squeals.
You almost stand to get out of here if it means preventing people from associating you with him. He grabs your hand and drags you back down into your seat before you can properly escape, much to your dismay. “Relax, I’m just playing.”
“Are you here to mess around or help me?”
“Well, you need to tell me so I can help you. What do you even know about him?”
“About Geto?”
“Yeah, unless there’s someone else you want to know more about?” He grins, easy and confident.
You ignore his comment. “Well, I know he… likes books. music. He's kind… thoughtful. Plays the guitar. Ah, specifically electric."
“Are you listing off what’s on his dating profile right now?”
“Shut up,” you snap, but it comes out weaker than intended.
“He isn’t actively on any dating app right now, just for your information.”
“And how would you know this? What are you doing on there?”
“I’m not on hinge, unfortunate for the female population, I know. We just tell each other everything,” he says, leaning back, one elbow resting on the armrest of his chair as he studies you from across the table. “I’m helping you, you know? First rule, don’t just parrot his interests. Though maybe I don't have to worry about that since you’re clearly struggling to even remember them.”
“I wasn’t going to parrot him.”
“I know you were,” he interrupts, wagging a finger. “Last time I checked, liking exactly what he likes does not make you compatible. It makes you predictable. And desperate.”
“Okay, harsh.”
“It's all tough love, sweets.”
You fold your arms, slumping back in your seat, letting gravity do half the work of your sulk. “Fine then, oh wise love guru. What should i say instead? Like, let’s say he asks me what I'm into and my mind goes blank like last time. What then?”
“You're asking like it’s that difficult. Just be honest, tell him what you like regardless if it matches his interests. Do you want to be a groupie or be something more than a friend?”
“I want to be someone he likes.”
“So you're going to play the role of Suguru’s perfect girlfriend? And what after that, genius? Are you just going to pretend forever?”
Gojo looks over to the front counter and smiles at some waitresses standing there already looking in his direction. He turns back as they start giggling and playfully arguing over who should come over to take his order.
“Don’t force yourself to perform for him or curate yourself to be digestible. If the two of you are meant to be then he should want you.”
You look away, picking at nothing on your glass. “That's easy for you to say.”
“It's actually incredibly tiring being this emotionally intelligent all the time,” he says, face neutral.
You snort despite yourself and he looks satisfied.
“And what if I tell him and he doesn’t like it?”
Gojo shrugs, slow and deliberate. “Then he’s not for you.”
You frown. “Wow, you’re terrible at pep talks.”
One of the waitresses finally makes it to your table, an eager smile on her face and a determined look in her eyes. Behind her, you catch the rest of the staff shooting encouraging looks. She clutches her notepad a little too tightly, taking in a deep breath before talking. “Hello, are you, um, both ready to order?”
“Yeah,” Gojo says easily, flashing her a smile. “I’ll just grab a hazelnut toffee latte with soy milk.”
The woman quickly scribbles his order down. “Of course! One hazelnut toffee latte with soy milk.”
“And whatever she wants,” he adds, nodding toward you.
You blink, caught off guard. “Oh, I already ordered earlier. I'm fine for now, thanks.”
The waitress spares you a glance, eyes flickering briefly over you before returning to Gojo like a magnet snapping back into place. “Not a problem. Is there anything else I can get you started with today?”
“We're good, thank you.”
Her face falls. She nods, but lingers a moment too long, clearly hoping for something, another question, a joke, anything to keep the interaction going.
Gojo’s grin grows just a little bit wider as he obliges.
“Busy today?” He asks casually, tone warm and interested.
Her face lights up and she quickly steps forward again. “A little! It's usually busy in the mornings what with the morning rush and all. Honestly, it’s like nonstop until at least 1pm.”
“That’s brutal,” he sympathises, leaning back in his chair, posture loose and open. “At least you’ve got good coffee to survive on.”
She laughs, a bright and breathy sound that makes it clear she’s not just laughing at the coffee comment alone. “Perks of the job, I suppose. Do you come here often?”
Gojo tilts his head as if the question deserved genuine thought and wasn’t just a throwaway pick up line.
“Not as often as I should,” he decides easily. “But I might start if the service is this friendly.”
Her smile widens, pink creeping into her cheeks. “We try our best.”
“I was talking about you, sweetheart.”
You’ve been listening and watching with apt attention, taking mental notes on the right time to smile, when to tilt your head just so, when to tuck your hair behind your ears and when to employ the double tuck, when his last words make you frown.
You clear your throat, eyes fluttering away when both Gojo and waitress look over at you.
“Well,” the waitress starts suddenly, glancing down at her notepad like she needs to remind herself she’s on the clock, "I'll bring your drink out as soon as it’s ready.”
“Looking forward to it,” Gojo replies, though he hasn’t looked away from you yet.
She lingers half a beat longer, then turns and walks away, shoulders a little straighter than before.
“Done staring?” He teases.
“I was not staring. Don't you have the tact to not flirt with someone else when you’re on a date?”
“Oh, so now it’s a date? Only when it’s convenient for you, huh?”
You reach over for a napkin and crumble it up to throw it at him. It barely makes it halfway across the table before it starts fluttering down.
“It’s only manners,” you insist, cheeks warm. “I didn't know what to do when the two of you were talking.”
He snorts. “You could’ve joined the conversation.”
“And said what? "Hello, I'm also present and this jerk’s date for the day?”
“Hey, I like the sound of that,” he muses.
Your next crumpled up napkin doesn’t get any further than its predecessor. You glare at him, something about that conversation rubbing you the wrong way, echoing unpleasantly in your head in a way that makes you want to peel your skin off.
You clear your throat again.
“You're here to teach me like I taught you statistics, right? Even though one is clearly harder than the other.”
“Right. Getting you to date ready is much more difficult.”
You ignore him to save the life of one napkin. “So, how do I do that? Flirt so effortlessly and not make it cringe?”
“You want to use what I just said with the waitress on Suguru?” He actually laughs out loud. “Do not, he’s going to see right through you. You should have met his last ex. The two of them were absolutely disgusting and— oh wait, should I not talk about that?”
“Yeah, let’s not.”
He hums and changes the subject. “Anyway, just let it happen. Be natural. You talk to me just fine.”
“Yeah, but you’re you. frivolous, class clown, never takes anything seriously, probably never commits to anything,” you start listing, counting them on your fingers.
“I feel like the first thing and the last thing mean the same thing. Put one finger down.”
You refuse, still holding up four fingers. “Sleeps on a mattress on the ground.”
“So does half of Sig Kap. But relax, I get it. So you suck at flirting. Shouldn’t you be happy I gave you a live demonstration of how it’s done?”
That gets you frowning again.
“Do you always call everyone something?”
“What does that even mean?”
“You called her sweetheart.”
“I don't know her name. I wasn't about to call her ‘woman’, that sounds very sexist and I'm a feminist at heart. Thoughts on banning periods?”
“She has a name tag.”
“I don’t look at that area on a woman on the first date,” he pledges.
You continue without thinking.“How is anyone supposed to know when you actually mean it when you give everyone similar nicknames?”
He goes quiet, eyes narrowing slightly. “What?”
Before you can elaborate, or maybe divert and make him look away so you can dig yourself out of the hole you just created, the waitress returns with his drink. She leans over him, placing it down carefully.
“Here you go!”
“Thanks,” he says, polite but no longer quite as engaged. In fact, he hasn’t looked away from you, still giving you that same disbelieving look.
You fiddle with your own drink. Maybe you should have ordered something else if it meant spicing up the number of objects you have in your possession to pass awkward silence with.
The waitress lingers a moment before hesitantly leaving when it’s clear there’s no encore performance.
“I just meant it’s confusing for anyone, hypothetically,” you say in a rush, beating him. “Anyway! Flirting techniques, let’s talk about them!”
He watches you for a moment longer before dropping his head and ruffling his hair. You grimace, eyeing how close his head is to his open drink. When he looks back up, whatever conflict on his face has disappeared.
“Fine, okay. Let's talk. First of all, it’s important where the date takes place. There's unspoken etiquette for every typical date location.”
“Like how you go on a coffee date, you shouldn’t flirt with the waitress.”
Gojo cracks a grin. “You’re getting it. Look, Suguru is kind of an artsy guy. He'd probably take you to an art museum or like a jazz bar for your first date.”
You narrow your eyes. “How do you know that?”
“I told you, he tells me everything. Focus.” He dismisses your look. “He’s kind of an enjoy-the-moment kind of guy. Probably won’t talk too much while you’re both admiring something together and saves all the talking until after when he leads you to some underground totally underrated dinner spot.”
You wince. “Shit. I kind of like making little jokes in the moment.”
He snaps his fingers, face brightening. “Right? Like when you’re watching a movie in the cinemas!”
“Okay, that is a bit tricky. It depends.”
“Don't Genshin theorycraft me.”
“You're lucky I got that reference.”
Gojo shrugs. “Well, Suguru enjoys just existing with his special someone. Don't get me wrong, he definitely talks when you get him started but I think he’s kinda cool for being able to sit in silence with someone.”
You chew the inside of your cheek. “I’m kind of bad with silences. I end up embarrassing myself just to fill them. Do you think it’s fixable? Should I just not talk?”
“Woah, slow down. It’s fine, he has enough social awareness to fill in the gaps if you’re uncomfortable. But i’m just telling you what he likes,” he studies you. “He doesn’t like petnames, by the way.”
Heat creeps up your neck. “That’s fine, it’s not a dealbreaker,” you mumble.
“I'm just saying. He's a real fan of using your first name. When you two get on that basis, of course.”
“Anything else, Geto expert?”
Gojo hums, taking a long sip of his latte, eyes tracking up. “He likes meaningful stuff like art with a story behind it, long conversations about philosophy. Like yeah he still likes doing things just for fun but there’s a difference between like and love.”
You wince. “But love is meant to be silly, meaningless stuff. Like sending pictures of dogs cuddling because it reminded you of us or whether you’d still love each other if you turned into worms. Like taking the longer way back home just to spend more time together. Or, I don't know, building blanket forts as adults.”
Gojo’s mouth twitches.
You stop, suddenly aware you sound like you’ve been storing these thoughts and they’ve suddenly all gotten loose.
“Stuff that doesn’t matter,” you finish weakly.
He rests his chin on his palm. “Like going to the arcade and getting plushies for each other at the claw machines?”
You laugh, shoulders relaxing. “I'd obviously do better. You look like you have no hand eye coordination.”
“Did you forget I literally play ice hockey?”
“Right, your role as the benchwarmer?”
“My ass has never once graced those benches.”
“I don't know, I swear I remember seeing you on the sidelines.”
“You’ve come to watch me play before?” He grins, cheek slightly smushed from his position.
“Because Shoko went.”
He juts his lower lip out. “Harsh.”
There's a few seconds of silence as the conversation replays and you feel a sudden rush of embarrassment. You look up to see if he clocked your earlier slip up but he only tilts his head more into his hand.
“What?”
“Nothing.” You clear your throat and look down at your drink. It's left behind a ring of water around its base. “How are you two best friends when you’re so different?”
“Because he slows me down,” Gojo says like it’s simple. “And I drag him out of his head. But he doesn’t need another person to do that for him so don’t even think of taking my spot.”
You both share a laugh and it lingers a little longer than the joke deserves, warm and easy, until it naturally tapers off into something softer.
“Why do you even like him?” He suddenly asks, voice soft against the murmur of the cafe.
You slowly slide your gaze out the window as if reliving the moment. You can almost feel the rain on your skin, the warmth of a hoodie not your own, and the residual laughter at the back of your throat that makes you smile.
“Last semester when it was pouring rain, he saw me waiting outside a building without an umbrella and we ended up running through the storm. It’s stupid but it was fun and meaningless and definitely what I needed after my finals.”
Your words make him frown, finger tracing a random shape on the wet surface of his glass absentmindedly. “That doesn’t sound like him.”
“Maybe you don’t know him as well as you thought?” You offer.
“Don’t be ridiculous, he’s my other half.”
“Again, should I be concerned right now?”
“Are you homophobic?”
“No?”
“Then you’re fine.”
“Wait…”
Gojo glances down at his phone and sighs. “It's getting late, sweets. I'd love to stay longer but I promised the boys we’d go do this carwashing event.”
He pauses and looks up.
“Did you want to come?” he quickly adds on, “You don’t have to come alone, you could bring Shoko along or something.”
You wrinkle your nose. “No thanks. You can imagine that she’s not keen on seeing a bunch of shirtless boys.”
He grins. “Suit yourself. I'll walk you out. It's the least I can do on this date.”
You roll your eyes but stand and follow him out anyway, ducking under his arm as he holds the door open for you. Stepping out, you’re almost blinded by the bright sun and you have to cover your eyes to look up, squinting even with the shade provided by your palm.
He moves to stand in front of you. “Well, I'll see you around.”
Next tutoring session,” you remind him, letting your arm drop to your side. "Don't forget to watch the online lectures before then. And remember to do the weekly quizzes this time. And—”
He reaches over to ruffle your hair fiercely, laughing when your words turn into a startled squeak.
“Yes, yes, I got it,”
He lets you go and watches with a toothy grin as you start fixing your hair, glaring up at him and his audacity to smirk. His face quickly softens.
“Sorry I can’t walk you back to your dorms. I'm already running kind of late.”
“Don't worry about it,” you say when you feel like you look presentable enough. “Um, get there safe?”
“I will,” he starts stepping back. “Text me if you need anything.”
“Okay, make sure to—”
“Relax, sweets, I got it,” He says with a chuckle and a wave, before he turns and starts walking off in your opposite direction.
You watch him go for a little longer before heading back to your dorm.You stare up at your ceiling. your ceiling stares back down at you. You've been staring at your popcorn ceiling for so long that you’ve begun to discern shapes and different shades of what you had previously considered to be beige, plain and simple, but was now warping into the image of Gojo.
Something he had done yesterday clung to you even hours after the date. The ease in which he allowed the waitress’ fingers to brush his as he handed her the menus, the way he easily held onto your hand at the party, the lack of concern as he stood close to you on the walk back. You lift up your hands and slowly interlace your fingers. It's comfortable, familiar. until you start wondering one hand as someone else's.
Before you can doubt yourself, you pull yourself up and gather your phone and keys, heading to the door without another thought. On the way through the dorms, you send a quick text.
you: u free? im coming over
You stand outside Gojo’s door and knock. There's a muffled, incoherent reply before the door is pulled open, revealing Gojo. His hair is slightly damp with stubborn strands clinging to his forehead and he’s brushing his teeth. He's not wearing a shirt.
You stare at his chest.
“One second,” he says around the foam in his mouth. He holds the door open a little wider and ushers you in, letting the door fall to a gentle click behind you. “Sit on the couch.”
Wordlessly, you do, watching his bare back as he heads into his bathroom. The sound of water muffles your racing thoughts until he reappears, still shirtless but at least he’s not brushing his teeth anymore.
“Hey,” he says, irritatingly casual. “I saw your text. You didn’t even wait to see if I was free or not. For the record I am but imagine I wasn't. That would have been an awkward situation and between you and her, I would have picked her.”
You blink away your surprise and look up at him. “Her?”
“It’s a Friday night, Y/N. You’re lucky I don't have someone over.”
You frown a little at that and he continues, heading to his kitchenette to open his fridge, pulling out two beers. He hands you one, pushing it towards you once more when you don’t immediately take up his offer.
“So, what are you doing here?”
“Are you going to put on a shirt?”
He blinks before a wide grin splits across his face. “I was wondering what you were looking at so deep in thought. I didn't want to assume again after you made a fool of me at the party but I guess you do have working eyes after all. Do you want me to put on a shirt?”
You blush, finally looking away. “Obviously.”
He chuckles and places his beer down on the coffee table before going on a hunt to find a clean shirt. “But from the way you were eyeing me it really wasn’t that obvious. Besides, you’re telling me to put on a shirt in my own home?”
“It's common sense when you have a guest over.”
His voice carries over from his room. “You’re not really a guest, more like a pest. A guest implies I invited you over, no?”
“But yesterday you said I could come to you for anything.”
“Right. What was I thinking?” Gojo comes back out and flops next to you, the couch dipping under his sudden weight. He takes the beer from your hands and cracks it open before handing it back and doing the same to his. “So, you finally going to tell me what’s up or are you just here to leech off my dwindling beer supply?”
“I don’t even drink,” you mumble, watching as the water beads down your fingers.
“No, but I do have some manners for my guest.”
“You just said…” you trail off, recognising that you’ll only go round and round in circles if you keep up this conversation. you place the beer on the floor and turn to him. “Forget it. I'm here because I need your help.”
“Figures.” He holds the beer to his lips and takes a deep swig. “What can I do for you today?”
You bite your lip before turning to him. “Can I kiss you?”
Gojo chokes, pulling the beer from his lips with a hack, liquid spitting out onto his no longer clean shirt and sweatpants. He finally manages to get his mouthful of beer down, but he only coughs and hits at his chest. Hesitantly, you reach over and pat his back lightly.
He shrugs your touch away, looking at you in disbelief. “What did you just say?”
“I was wondering if you’d let me kiss you?”
“Just because you’re saying it politer now doesn’t take away how crazy you sound.” He stares at you incredulously. “Look, I know we went on a date yesterday but I thought you of all people knew it was a practice date. I'm sorry but I don't feel the same way. Gojo Satoru doesn’t do relationships.”
You groan, rolling your eyes. “I didn’t suddenly develop a crush on you, Gojo.”
“Satoru,” he corrects you despite his shock.
“Satoru,” you emphasise. “I don’t like you.”
“Could have fooled me.”
“Yesterday just got me thinking. You’re so natural with touching and stuff and I realised that I have literally no experience whatsoever. I know Geto isn’t the type of person to care about whether I'm a virgin or not but I care. I care because I know I'll freeze up if we ever get to that part.”
He stares at you. “When i asked you a few days ago about whether or not you wanted to sleep with him, you told me to shut up.”
“That was a few days ago.” You shuffle closer to him on the couch and watch as his eyes drop to your thighs inching closer, then back up, something like fear on his face. “I know this is a big favour but I thought since you’ve kissed so many girls before and they’ve never meant anything that you might be okay with this? I mean you thought we were going to kiss that time at the party. So is this really that crazy to ask?”
“Yes,” he says immediately. “It is. because you like Suguru and I'm his best friend.”
“But this is practice.”
“You can’t just echo what I've said in the past.” He runs a hand through his hair, looking off in the distance before coming back to you. “Suguru isn’t the type of person to rush to things like that. You'd be in good hands.”
“I know but this is for me. So I know what to expect.”
His face is contorted in a way you’ve never seen before. You decide to give another push.
“Just think of me as one of your hookups.”
He exhales softly, eyes staring into yours. “Are you sure? Have you even thought this through?”
“Yes, I have,” you lie. “I mean, there aren’t any cons. I'll lose my first kiss, get experience, and it’s all under practice anyway so it won’t mean anything. And you get a hookup for the night. It's a win win!”
His face only seems to pale more at your words. “You haven’t had your first kiss yet? Fuck, that’s a lot of pressure. And I feel like you have the wrong idea about what a hookup entails.”
You shrug. “Kissing? Making out?”
“Sex.”
You pause. “Well, we won’t go that far. Maybe.”
“Maybe?” He exclaims and you quickly deflect because he’s looking more and more shocked.
“We can start with kissing.” You shift closer, your thigh pressing against his. “Come on, it doesn’t have to mean anything.”
Gojo looks at you, really looks at you, from the encouraging look in your eyes to the determined line of your lips. He huffs, running another hand through his hair at the absurd change to his Friday night plans. Sure, kissing someone wasn’t a big deal for him, not when he’s tasted the lips of many before, but there was something different about taking someone’s first kiss.
Finally, he sighs, long and hard. “Just a kiss.”
You beam, face lighting up. “Of course!”
He hesitates, cursing under his breath something long but incoherent, before gently reaching out to tilt your chin up. “Tell me if you change your mind. Just shove me away, okay?”
You nod enthusiastically. “What do I have to do?”
“Just let me take the lead for now. And if you feel confident enough to kiss back, go for it.” Again, Gojo mumbles something under his breath, the absurdity of the situation still not lost to him. He leans forward as if to seal the deal before pausing, moving his hand up to caress your cheek tenderly.
Your breath hitches, eyes wide as you curse your own touch-starved form.
“You okay?” He asks, stroking your cheekbone with his thumb. “Changed your mind?”
You shake your head slightly.
Gojo huffs and you feel the puff of air against your lips.
When his lips finally press against yours, fitting against yours in a way you’ve only ever seen in movies, you feel… nothing. You squeeze your eyes tighter, trying to dig through the sensations and pick out the one that’s meant to set off fireworks and melt your stomach into goo. Instead, it just feels like there’s someone’s lips touching yours.
Sensing your discomfort, Gojo pulls back, eyes fluttering open to meet your unsure ones. His nose scrunches up a little as he studies your expression.
“Hey,” he starts, voice low. “You're hurting my ego.”
You lick your lips, trying to return your lips to their usual sensation. “It just wasn’t what I was expecting.”
“What were you expecting?”
“Butterflies?”
He chuckles, hand still caressing your cheek. “You're kissing me without any feeling. It’s not my fault you’re as stiff as a board. Relax. Imagine Suguru or something.”
Now it’s your turn to make a face. "Wouldn't that hurt your ego more?”
“Just relax,” he repeats and you make the conscious effort to focus on the way he’s stroking your face soothingly. “That’s it. Good girl.”
“Don't call me that, I cringed.”
He laughs, leaning in. “Abandon the part of you that cringes not the part of you that is cringe.”
With that, he brushes his lips against your again, letting you feel the slow movement and determine the pace.
It’s not exactly rocket science, this kissing business, and you start to mimic the motion of parting your lips against his. It takes a few tries for him to hum in approval and deepen the kiss, his free hand sliding up to cup your neck and gently pull you closer to him. You let out a soft squeak and quickly pick up from the momentary break in rhythm on your end.
When his tongue slides against the seam of your lips, you blanch and pull back.
“Okay,” he starts. “That really hurt my feelings.”
“What was that?” You cover your mouth with your hands, the slimy sensation replaying in your mind.
“That was my tongue.”
“Why didn’t it feel good?”
He rolls his eyes at your complaint and slides an arm around your waist, pulling you closer until you’re half on his lap. “Because you’re thinking too hard.”
“I was not thinking at all, actually,” you say, scandalised. “I didn't know I was going to be ambushed.”
“Okay, my bad, I should have given you a heads up.” He pauses and announces solemnly, "I'm going to start using my tongue.”
You make a face and he huffs out a laugh, forehead dropping briefly against yours. Up close like this, you can feel the vibration of it in his chest, the way his grip tightens just a little like he doesn’t want you getting any bright ideas about you escaping.
“You're doing fine,” he says more softly, thumb brushing slow circles at your waist.
You think briefly that this must be the allure to him that has girls fawning for his attention. You're not immune either, and you sub consciously melt under his touch, relaxing again. Once you’ve done it once, given into his temptation, it’s easy to fall back again.
“Fine doesn’t seem like outstanding status,” you mumble, trying to maintain some resistance.
“For your first time, it wasn’t so bad.” His nose nudges yours, playfully and coaxing and you’re in his web again. “C’mere.”
Gojo doesn’t pull you this time. Instead, he just waits, one arm warm and steady around your hips, hand stroking your hair as he waits for you to come to him. It's a sign of consideration that has you feeling jittery and warm, though there’s a lazy smirk on his lips that suggests he has other ulterior motives that makes it as infuriating as it is attractive.
Your gaze flicks to his mouth then back to his eyes. His lashes lower just slightly, watching you watch him, and something in your stomach flips over completely. Probably your common sense.
“Just… slower,” you mumble.
“Yeah,” he says quietly. “Slower.”
He still doesn’t move first which is deeply unfair, because now you have to be the brave one.
You lean in. It's clumsy at first, more of a gentle bump of noses and a too-soft press of lips than anything smooth or cinematic like he had kissed you earlier. You almost pull back in embarrassment, ready to admit that maybe he was a better kisser than you had given him credit for if it’ll mean this pathetic peck of yours can end and he can make it good again, when his hand tightens on your hip and he takes over.
His mouth settles properly over yours, angle shifting until the awkwardness disappears, until it stops being baby’s first kiss and starts becoming a warm, steady pressure that has your toes curling. Yhe faint brush of his breath against your cheek, the subtle tilt of his head that fits your mouth together and when he nips at your bottom lip, a soft startled sound escapes before you can stop it.
He swallows it down without hesitation.
His hand tightens reflexively and slides down, cupping your ass as he leans back and guides you onto him, fingers pressing into the fabric of your clothes to keep you there, not that you had any plans of moving. One moment your body is twisted awkwardly to meet him and the next you’re seated full on his lap, his warmth solid beneath you.
His breath fans across your cheek in uneven bursts, warm and damp, and the faint scrape of his teeth lingers as a tingling awareness.
You realise, distantly, that you’re no longer stiff.
Your hands, which had been braced awkwardly against his shoulders, loosen without permission. One slides up into his hair as you lean into him, damp strands cool at the ends, warm near the scalp, and the sensation grounds you in a way nothing else does. His mouth opens at the sensation and when his tongue sweeps along your lower lip again, you don’t pull away. It isn’t slimy or invasive like last time, in fact you welcome it, mimicking his openness and the kiss deepens.
Your breath mingles, movements syncing up and under the guidance of his lips and tongue, you start getting bolder.
You shift closer, just a fraction, your head moving up and face tilting down to angle yourself deeper when a low sound slips out of him.
Your eyes fly open and you pull away. “Was that—”
“Nope,” he says immediately, eyes darker than when you last checked. He's panting beneath your palms, a slightly warm tint to his face as he stares at you.
You swallow. “You just—”
“I didn’t,” he insists, far too quickly.
When he’s so adamant like that, it’s a little hard to say anything more. Besides, while it’s almost fun to poke the bear, the memory of his mouth on yours has you thinking about something else entirely.
You don’t move from his lap and he doesn’t push you off.
“Think you’re getting it?” he asks, watching you with something unreadable lurking in his eyes.
You don’t hesitate. “No.”
You stare at each other, catching a much needed breath.
“Alright,” he says, voice rough. “One more. and then we have to stop.”
You lean in and he lets out a soft sigh like a man doomed before meeting you halfway.
Gojo doesn’t start slow this time, maybe because he knows if he does, he won’t be able to control himself.
His hand slides more firmly to the back of your neck, guiding you towards him with a kind of impatience, mouth finding yours with confidence, your chest tightening at the gesture. Your fingers clutch at his shirt instinctively and he makes a low noise at the back of his throat, deepening the kiss until you slide your fingers up and into his hair.
A low exhale slips through his nose, almost shaky and he tilts his head in response to your faint tugs.
“That’s it,” he murmurs against your lips.
Emboldened, you tilt your head and slide your tongue into his mouth to taste him. He tastes like beer and minty and something addictive that has you repeating the movement over and over. When he reciprocates, your stomach swoops instead of recoiling.
You shift, suddenly desperate to get closer and settle over his bulge.
Wow.
You both jerk away from each other quickly, your hands leaving his hair and his arm retracting from your waist. The break feels violent in its suddenness, like surfacing too fast in deep water.
Cold air rushes between you where there had only been warmth seconds ago. Your lips tingle, oversensitive, parted as you drag in a shaky breath. Gojo’s chest rises and falls sharply, eyes wide in a way you’ve never seen before, pupils blow dark. For once, there is no smirk, no teasing glint, just a raw, stunned awareness, like he’s trying to process several things at once and failing at all of them.
You become acutely aware of exactly where you’re sitting.
Heat floods your face and to the tips of your ears. you scramble backward, knees slipping against the couch cushions, putting space between your bodies even as the loss of his warmth makes your skin prickle.
“Oh my god,” you breathe, horrified. “I didn’t—I mean, I wasn't trying to—”
“Don’t,” he groans, slumping back, covering his flushed face with his arm. His other hand reaches down to adjust himself though he doesn’t seem to have any ideas of covering himself so you watch unabashedly. “Just don’t say anything for a second.”
You clamp your mouth shut obediently.
The room feels too small, too quiet, every little sound like the rustle of fabric or the faint hum of the fridge in the kitchenette, even your own uneven breathing, suddenly feels magnified.
Eventually, Gojo pulls himself up, fixing dark eyes on your figure.
“I’m sorry.” You rush to say, though you’re not sure what you’re apologising for.
“It’s fine, it’s not your fault. It wasn't because of you, I guess I've just been pent up,” he runs his hand through his hair and you watch as he pauses, something passing over his face before he abruptly pulls his hand away. “Anyway, it’s normal.”
You nod too fast. “Right, yes. Totally fine. Super normal, nothing weird happened.”
“Right,” he says. “Nothing weird.”
Your shoulders sag a little, tension leaking out now that that’s been cleared up. The adrenaline leaves behind a strange floaty sensation and you try, and fail, to push down the sudden desire to continue, to explore even further.
“We’re definitely stopping the practice today,” he says, crushing your dreams.
You nod again, somewhat grateful that a decision has been made for you considering the conflict thoughts warring in your head. “Okay.”
He suddenly ruffles his hair all messy and stands up with an exaggerated groan that makes you jump. “Okay! That's over. You did good by the way. You’re gonna be trouble when you actually start dating someone.”
You frown. “Why?”
“It's a compliment, sweets, learn to recognise them, yeah?” He starts walking over to his kitchenette. “Want an actual drink?”
Your brain is still somewhere back in that last kiss, struggling to catch up. “Sure. Just water, right?”
He snorts. “I’m not a creep.”
When you lean back against the couch and close your eyes to recenter yourself, he steals a glance and lets out a long exhale. He closes his eyes for a moment like he’s deeply exhausted.
When he opens his eyes again and makes his way to you, his signature smirk is back.
If anyone saw how nervous you look about to text Gojo, they might think you had a crush on him. Which is absurd because you clearly have a crush on Geto.
Your thumb hovers over the send button, chewing the inside of your cheeks as you debate whether this is a good idea or not.
It’s been a week since you first asked Gojo for advice and though his methods weren’t orthodox nor was he incredible help, you still had to give him his merits. Talking to him was relaxing in a way, the constant back and forth familiar and even his judgement didn’t seem to come from a bad place. The physical stuff was a whole other story and did not influence your thoughts on how you felt about him whatsoever.
In summary, Gojo has given you determination that you couldn’t have achieved on your own.
Using this newfound confidence, you take a deep breath and finally hit send.
you: hey are you in class today?
Not even a full minute later, his reply buzzes.
gojo: yeah i am
stalking me, super fan?
you: god this is exactly why i hate texting u
gojo: :(
why whats up though
ur class doesn’t finish until 2 right?
you: yeah how did u know that?
u sure ure not my super fan?
gojo: guilty!
i just know dont ask what u cant handle
so u gonna leave me in suspense or are u gonna tell me
you: well you have class with geto right
The inside of your cheeks starts getting a little tender as you continue to gnaw and bite at the flesh, anxiously waiting as Gojo’s typing bubbles appear and disappear.
gojo: yeah i do
you: can i come see you?
gojo: what
you: like ill come to your class but can you leave after so its just me and him
u were talking about creating these situations on saturday right
so like
wouldnt this be perfect?
gojo: god this conversation isn’t good for my heart
you: ?
gojo: our class ends later than urs
you: that’s fine i can wait !!
gojo: nah i dont feel like it
you: ?????
man what the hell you said you’d help me
gojo: and i did
on saturday
what if i want suguru all to myself today?
you: come on please???
gojo: what if i dont want to see u
you: well i wont be bothering u this time
i just need an excuse to see him
i think whatever magic u casted over me on sat worked im feeling like scarily confident
i want to talk to him before the feeling goes away
like i feel like i can really do it this time you know?
please satoru?
gojo: god u have no idea how evil u are
fine
ill get us to go to the library
you: THANK YOU@!!!!!!
gojo: u owe me
you: YES DEFINITELY
gojo: another date this friday then
you: OKAY!!!
wait what
Waiting at the library is agonising. you attempt to complete some smaller tasks for your courses that you’ve left in lieu of thinking about, well, boys. But just like every time before, your thoughts stray and settle on him. His pretty effortless smiles, his soft laughter, that sparkling glint in his eyes when he looks at you and it’s like the world quietens just to listen too. his long fingers, the mole on his earlobe, his white—
When your phone buzzes again an hour later, you jump up from your seat to find the location of the photo Gojo sent.
You slip into the fifth library floor as quietly as possible, scanning the endless rows of students for the familiar top of someone’s head. It doesn't take long for your eyes to settle on him.
Gojo is impossible to miss, slouched low in a study booth, hood up and drooping over his hair and the bottom pulled up to cover his mouth. His arms are crossed over his chest as he stares at his laptop screen.
And of course, Geto sits across from him.
Taking in a deep breath, you slow your pace into something that might pass as a casual stroll as if you had randomly come upon them by chance and stop by their booth.
“Oh, hi Satoru!”
He doesn’t look up. “Hey.”
Then, after a manual moment, you turn to Geto. “Oh my god! Geto? Wow.” Your voice comes out pitched a little too loud. “What a coincidence!”
Geto looks up with a smile. “Hey, Y/N. What are the chances we ran into each other?”
Gojo snorts and you don’t miss how pointed it is. You take the chance to glare at the side of his face but he only sinks into his hoodie with a grumble. You continue to stare, even narrowing your eyes as if it’ll sharpen your gaze and he finally lets out a loud groan, flipping the hood down to ruffle his hair and sit up.
“Oh no,” he announces into the silence, loud enough to draw a few irritated glances, not that he cares. He checks his phone, staring at his empty notification list. “It looks like my best friend accidentally locked himself out of his dorm.”
Geto pauses. “I'm your best friend.”
You purse your lips, watching as Gojo begins to slowly pack up his things. Granted, he only needed to close his laptop and shove it into his tote bag, without a case mind you. He refuses to look up despite your efforts to catch his gaze.
“Sorry man, duty calls. I can’t help that i’m such a good friend.” He stands, slinging his bag over his shoulder. When he passes by, his arm brushing against yours despite the empty space all around, he leans down to whisper, “Good luck.”
You don’t have the time to decipher if it’s sincerity or sarcasm that you detect because he leaves, his lingering cologne the only sign that he was ever there.
You turn back to Geto, offering a small, awkward smile, wondering if he’s caught on.
“What was that about?” You laugh.
Geto chuckles softly. “Sorry about him. You know how he can be sometimes.”
He looks up at you patiently.
“Well, an empty spot has opened up. Are you staying to study?”
You fight the urge to celebrate. You happily erase thoughts of Gojo from your mind, leaving the gruelling task of decoding his strange behaviour for another day. Gojo’s seat is still warm when you take it, pulling out your laptop just for the act. There was no way you were wasting this golden opportunity with actually studying, don’t be silly.
“So,” you begin, picking at the corner of your sleeve. “Any plans this weekend?”
“You didn’t hear? Satoru is having a game this weekend. It’s just a preliminary but he’s been hyped for it. I'm sure he’d love it if you rocked up.”
You almost laugh out loud. “No way. He'd hate that.”
Geto’s brows lift, amused. “Why would he hate it?”
“Because,” you say, gesturing vaguely. “We're not really friends. More like we have a symbiotic relationship. If we didn’t have that, I doubt we’d even talk to each other.”
“I don't think so,” Geto smiles at you but instead of giving you the butterflies, it leaves you feeling unsure. “But you should come. Not by yourself, of course, I'm sure Shoko would come along.”
“If she was going to go, she’d just take Utahime.” You shift in your seat, throwing the idea around in your head. “Even if I wanted to, I don't think I know anyone else who’d want to come with.”
“Do you want to go with me?”
Your brain blanks.
“What?”
“I was planning on going anyway,” he says, tone casual and all your senses tunnel-vision on him. “Besides, I've been curious about the girl who’s been taking up so much of Satoru’s time.”
Your answer is obvious.
“I’d love to!”
It comes out a little too fast, a little too bright, but you can’t quite bring yourself to care. Relief, excitement, disbelief, it all tangles together in your chest until the only discernable thing left is a giddy sort of lightness.
Geto’s smile widens, clearly pleased and you beam back. He hands you his phone.
“Can I have your Insta then? So I can text you the details later.”
Your hands shake as you take it, thumbs clumsy as you type in your username, backspacing more times than you’d like to admit. You’re suddenly hyperaware of everything, the way he’s close enough to see your screen, the warmth of his hand where it had just been, the ridiculous desire to go through your own profile but through his eyes settling on your mind. Later, you can already imagine stalking your own profile, scrutinising every photo, every caption, trying to imagine what it would look like to be him scrolling through for the first time.
When he takes his phone back, he doesn’t immediately pocket it. Instead, he actually looks, thumb scrolling down, humming.
Oh god, he’s looking right now.
"Where's that quote from your bio from?” He asks, glancing up briefly. “It sounds familiar.”
“Oh, um. It’s from my favourite novel.” Your eyes flutter across his face as you tell him the title, sneaking in a quick description to try to sell it.
“I’ll have to check it out then,” Geto says, putting his phone away. “Do you read often?”
“Not as much as I want to. You know how it is, with school and everything. Not to mention books are crazy expensive nowadays.”
He nods sympathetically. “There's this small bookshop tucked away near the city. It's actually close by the rink where Satoru’s game is. I could show you after his game on Saturday.”
Your breath catches.
“After the game?” You repeat, trying very hard to sound normal and not out-of-breath.
Geto nods, completely at ease.
“If you’re not in a rush to get back after,” he adds, considerate as ever. “It says open pretty late.”
You stare at him for a second, thoughts scrambling over each other.
He’s inviting you out after a game. That meant walking together, talking more, being alone without the buffer of a crowd screaming over a bunch of men slamming into each other and hitting with their sticks.
You realise you’re meant to give an answer and quickly hurry.
“Yeah, that sounds perfect actually!” You say, a touch too fast, then wince and try again, softer. “I mean—yeah. That sounds really nice.”
“Good,” he says simply, smile deepening. “It's a cozy place. You could get lost in there for hours.”
“That sounds dangerous. I already have a book-buying problem."
“Secondhand prices,” he reminds you. “It's much safer.”
You hum. “That's debateable. Lower prices just means I have to buy more.”
You can’t believe your luck. Not only had Geto basically invited you on a date to Gojo’s game, he’s also asked you to go book shopping together afterward. And somehow, you had just finished a perfectly normal conversation with him without embarrassing yourself beyond recovery.
Could things possibly get any better?
“You know,” he starts up again and you lean in. “Satoru’s doing suspiciously good in his classes recently. Any clue why?”
You freeze, temporarily thrown off guard. “He better be. I don't tutor him for nothing.”
“I knew it was you. Why are you tutoring him? If he’s blackmailing you, I can help,” he says with a straight face.
“No, no! Nothing like that!” You rush to explain.
He cracks a smile. “I’m just joking. He's not actually as bad as his reputation makes him out to be. It's all bad rep, you know?”
While you’ve known Gojo through his reputation for as long as you can remember, you’ve never once stopped to consider that might not be everything about him.
“What do you mean?”
“Sig Kap had a frat sweetheart two years ago,” Geto explains, folding his hands loosely on his laptop. “She was nice, really sweet but some of the older guys treated her like shit. When Satoru called some of the boys out for messing with her they weren’t too happy.”
Your brows lift. “So did they kick him out or something?”
“Not that there’s much they could have done considering his family.”
“What about them?”
He glances at you surprised. “You don’t know?”
You shake your head.
“Huh.” His expression softens into something gentler. “Yeah. A lot of people approach him because they want something, connections, favours, you know the deal. He absolutely hates it. Ironically, that influence is also what kept the older guys from pushing back too hard and they couldn’t exactly scare him off so he’s there to stay.”
“And some people still don’t like him?”
“Some still don’t,” Geto confirms. “So they spread all those stupid rumours instead. Probably easier that way since it’s not exactly traceable.”
Your stomach tightens. “What kind of rumours?”
He hesitates, then shrugs. “Stuff about him sleeping around. that he’s messed with every girl on campus, that kind of thing. You don’t have to look so devastated, it doesn’t bother him much. If anything, it gets him more game. But it’s far from the truth. I mean you’re a girl on campus and he hasn’t messed with you.”
Something about the way he says it, calm and matter-of-fact, makes your chest ache.
“He did earn a lot of respect back,” Geto continues, oblivious to your growing distress. “Especially from the younger guys. But some of the older ones never really got over it.”
He falls silent, studying you with that gentle, searching look that makes you feel like you’re under a microscope and the spotlight is shining down on you. Whatever he sees under the lens makes him smile.
“It’s nice,” he says softly. “That you’re so genuine with him. He doesn’t get that very often.”
The words hit like a punch to the gut. Couldn't he have used a word other than ‘genuine’? Because you aren’t genuine, far from it, and that realisation makes your stomach drop, nausea blooming sharp and sudden and upheaving the contents.
You approached Gojo with a plan just like all those who have approached him with ulterior motives in the past. And you’ve used him for his friendship and his willingness to help, to get closer to the person right in front of you.
You are no better than the people Geto just described. Worse, even.
Heat rushes to your face, then drains away just as quickly, leaving you cold.
You push your chair back abruptly, the legs scraping loudly against the floor.
“Where did Gojo go?” you ask, wincing internally.
Geto blinks up at you, startled by the sudden shift. “Oh, uh.” He gestures vaguely toward the exit. “He said he had to help me—that is, his friend unlock his door. He's probably back in his room now though.”
You nod too quickly, already stuffing your laptop into your bag with fumbling hands, cables tangling as if they’re conspiring against you.
“Are you going after him?” Geto asks gently.
You freeze for a split second.
Are you?Here you are, sitting across from the person you supposedly like, the person you engineered this entire situation to get closer to, and you’re about to abandon the conversation to chase after his best friend. This is your chance, the perfect golden opportunity, and you’re throwing it away. and yet, you can’t bring yourself to completely doubt yourself.
“Yeah,” you say, half a smile hovering on your lips. “I’m so sorry. There’s just something I need to say to him.”
You bite your lip.
“See you at the match though?"
Geto’s surprise melts into an easy grin. "Don't worry about it. Good luck. And Y/N, seriously, take care of him, okay?”
The words prick at your skin with a faint sense of deja vu, but you don’t stop to examine it. Instead, you give Geto one last shaky smile, sling your bag over your shoulder, and hurry toward the exit. Your heart pounds so loudly it drowns everything else.
You knock at what you believe is his door if memory serves correct.
“Go away, I'm jerking it.”
You can’t decide if he’s being serious or just scaring unwanted guests away. Regardless, you clear your throat and talk.
“Sorry for interrupting? Look, it’s me, it’s Y/N. Can I come in?”
No sooner had you said your name, the door flies open, Gojo standing right behind, eyes wide and face flushed.
“Y/N? What are you—I mean, I thought you had that date with Suguru?” He goes to run a hand through his hair but pauses, switching to his other hand.
“Yeah well, clearly I left him to come see you.” You sigh deeply and brush past him into his room. “There’s something I need to say to you and it’s really eating up at me for some reason.”
“No sure, go ahead. Walk right in,” he mumbles but doesn’t try to stop you, instead closing the door gently. “What are you doing here? Because if you’re here to gloat or have a girl talk, Shoko is the one for you.”
You flop onto his couch, staring up at his ceiling. He pauses before following, the couch cushions dipping under his weight as he drops down beside you.
“Gojo, I’m really sorry,” you say, turning to him.
He stares back unamused. “I told you to call me Satoru.”
You blink, momentarily caught off guard before correcting yourself. “Satoru. I'm really sorry.”
“Okay.” His frown lifts and he leans back to look at you. “About what?”
You open your mouth, then close it again, suddenly unsure where to even start.
“About everything?” You try weakly.
He raises a brow. “That narrows it down.”
You groan, dragging a hand over your face. “Okay, specifically I feel like I've been using you and being annoying and dragging you into my mess. And also I abandoned you in the library which was rude and I don’t know what I was thinking. I guess I wasn't and I'm really sorry.”
Gojo blinks at you and you hold your breath for the verdict.
“...that’s it?”
“That’s not ‘it’, that’s a lot,” you argue, pushing yourself up. “You've been helping me this whole time and I'm just barging into your life, asking for unreasonable favors and taking up your time.”
He watches you for a long moment, something unreadable flickering behind his eyes, surprise, confusion, maybe even something softer that he quickly buries under a flippant expression.
“That's it?” he repeats, slower this time.
You nod, twisting in your fingers together in your lap, the fight leaving your body as quick as it came. “I mean, it's not nothing. I know I've been a lot. And you didn’t have to help me at all, with any of it, but you did and I…” Your voice falters. “I don't want you to think I was just… using you.”
Silence settles between you, thick but not entirely uncomfortable. The hum of his mini fridge in the corner fills the gaps. Somewhere down the hall, a door slams and laughter echoes faintly before fading.
Gojo exhales through his nose and leans back, head tipping against the couch cushion as he stares up at the ceiling.
“You’re terrible,” he mutters.
He turns his head to look at you properly, blue eyes sharp in a way that makes your chest tighten. Up close like this, without the buffer of banter or crowds or motion, it’s impossible to ignore how intense he can be when he isn’t performing for anyone. You've had the privilege to see this side of him a few times, and the thought that he’s let you in and you’ve only gone and used him fills you with more guilt.
“You didn’t abandon me in the library,” he continues. “I left on my own free will, remember?”
“Yeah but—”
“And you’re not using me,” he adds, voice flattening slightly. “If you were, then you aren’t using me to my full potential.”
You huff a weak laugh. “Thanks?”
“I mean it,” he says, not smiling. “People who use others don’t show up at their door looking like they’re going to throw up from guilt.”
Heat creeps up your neck. “I did not look like that.”
“You did,” he says easily. “Still kind of do.”
You shove his shoulder lightly. He barely moves, solid as ever, but the corner of his mouth lifts and the tension in your chest loosens at the sight.
“So… you’re not mad?” You ask carefully.
He considers that more seriously than you expected. “I was.”
The worry comes back tenfold.
“But not for the reason you think. So stop looking like you’ve aged ten years, sweets, it’s not a good look on you.”
You wait for him to elaborate but he doesn’t.
You sigh, unable to keep up with the emotional whiplash and opt to instead throw it all away.
“Okay, well that’s cryptic," you mutter.
He shrugs. “I'm a mysterious guy. It’s all part of the irresistable, untouchable charm.”
“I don’t see how you can be mysterious when you’re so loud.”
“I open up to you and this is what I get?”
“You did not open up.”
He turns his head back toward the ceiling. “And now I'm closing back down.”
You roll your eyes, but the knot in your chest has loosened enough that you can breathe again, you almost miss this back and forth and it seems he does too because he relaxes fully into his couch. Without thinking, you mimic him, shoulder brushing his. This time, neither of you moves away.
The proximity feels different than before. You've been closer to him than this, and you randomly recall being on his lap for some reason unrelated to this specific moment and the charged, quiet atmosphere.
After a moment, he speaks again, softer.
“Did you at least get what you wanted?”
You hesitate, the question knocking you out of orbit. “I think so. I mean he asked me to go to the game with him. and then a bookstore after.”
Gojo goes still beside you.
“My game?” He shakes his head with a scoff. “Figures. Well, good for you.”
You twist the fabric of your sleeve between your fingers, suddenly unsure why that answer feels so unsatisfying.
“Yeah,” you say anyway, forcing brightness into your voice. “It is good.”
He hums noncommittally, eyes still fixed somewhere on the ceiling. For someone who never shuts up, his silence feels louder than anything he could say. You sneak glances at him from the corner of your eye, observing the strong curve of his nose, the harsh bob of his Adam's apple, the rise and fall of his chest and his big hands you’ve had the opportunity to feel on your ass.
The quiet stretches, though it is far from quiet inside your head.
Then, before you can stop yourself, you’re already opening your mouth.
“Can I ask you something?”
His gaze slides to you instantly, sharp and attentive as if he was waiting for you to break the silence first. “Not to be that guy but you just did.”
“A real question.” You roll your eyes though his somewhat predictable rage bait helps ease some tension. Still, you hesitate, throat tight. If you say it out loud, it becomes real and no longer a suppressed fantasy. But if you don’t say anything, this feeling in your chest might never go away, tainting every future you might have with Geto.
“How do you know what you’re doing?” You ask.
One white brow lifts. “In what context? I'm good at a lot of things. You're gonna have to narrow it down, sweets.”
You groan softly. “With girls. With… touching. And stuff. Etcetera.”
Understanding dawns slowly, then all at once. You don’t catch the shift in experience because you stare stubbornly at your hands clasp in your lap, heat flooding your face.
“Oh.”
“I just don’t know,” you admit, voice small. “I don't know what I'm doing at all and it’s embarrassing.”
He sits up a little, attention sharpening in a way that makes your skin prickle.
“Y/N.”
You press on before he can interrupt. “I mean, I know theoretically, obviously. That's what bio class is for right? But I know in practice I’ll just freeze. Or overthink or do nothing. And if things ever go further with Geto, I don't want to be useless. You mentioned he’s had exes before, right? But I haven't. And that kind of sucks to think about.”
Then softly. “You're probably the closest thing to experience I have.”
“Useless,” he starts. “Is not the right word I'd use. Suguru would never think that. He’s not a dick.”
You finally look at him. “I don’t want him to regret it. Or think I'm awkward. or that I don't want him.”
He studies you for a long moment, jaw tight, eyes searching your face like he’s looking for something he hopes not to find. “And you’re telling me this because…?”
You scoff. “You're not stupid. I mean sure, you almost failed baby’s first statistics but you’re not dumb.”
“No, I guess I'm not, thanks,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair. “But I was kind of hoping maybe I'm still fantasising.”
“You were fantasising before?”
“Let's not go there.”
“It’s a Friday,” you say slowly. "Shouldn't you have a hook up right about now?”
He pouts, looking oddly down. “I wasn't feeling like it.”
“So you had to use your hand.”
“I wasn't jerking off, Y/N.”
Neither of you believe that statement. Here you are, sitting on the couch of campus heartthrob Gojo Satoru, joking around about the lack of a female body against him while you’re upset about being a virgin. Even Gojo, who isn’t admittedly the best at math, shouldn’t struggle with putting two and two together.
“Right, I believe you.” You bite your lip, opening your eyes wider as you plead. “I just hate feeling unprepared. You’ve seen just how bad I freeze. Can’t you help me?”
He chews on his lips aggressively before finally groaning, running a hand down his face. “You have the worst ideas known to man. Fine. I'll help you. But we're stopping if it gets weird.”
“Obviously.”
“Do you even remember how to kiss?”
“Find out for yourself.”
You grab his collar and tug him towards you, smacking your lips against his the second he’s in range. It's not the graceful, fireworks-exploding moment from rom-coms, more like two magnets clashing awkwardly, teeth bumping before you recall the right angle. Gojo chuckles into the kiss, the vibration tickling your mouth, and you pull back just enough to glare at him.
“It hurts that you don’t remember my lessons, sweets,” Gojo purrs, clearly enjoying your fluster.
“Shut up and kiss me properly,” you mutter, snarky even as your cheeks burn.
You dive back in, and this time it clicks, most likely due to his more active participation. Your lips move in sync, his tongue slipping past your teeth. It's surprisingly nice, all heat and shared air, making your stomach flip in a way that’s equal parts nerves and excitement. You didn’t realise how much you were craving this since the last time.
Gojo’s hands stay loose on your waist, respectful but firm, until he deepens the kiss with a low hum. You feel him shift under you, his body reacting before his brain catches up. When you break apart for air, his eyes are darker, pupils blown wide. He adjusts his hips, and there’s no missing the semi-hard bulge straining against his jeans because it nudges insistently against your inner thigh.
You both look down.
“Uh, yeah,” he says, voice a little rough, something like accusation in his eyes as he glares down at Gojo junior. “Guess that means you do remember lesson one after all. Mind if I lose the pants?”
You snort, trying to play it cool despite the heat pooling in your gut. “Not so reluctant now, huh?”
“Game is game.”
He grins, all cock swagger, and pops the buttons off his jeans. They slide down his legs in a heap, leaving him in snug black boxers that do nothing to hide his growing interest. Gojo’s leaner than you’d pegged him for, abs carved from lazy gym sessions, waist dipping in before flaring to solid shoulders. But your eyes zero in lower, where his cock twitches half-hard against the fabric, outlining a decent length that’s got you curiously intrigued rather than intimidated.
When he sits back down, he leans back on his palms and smirks. “You can touch me, you know. I bet it’s better than just looking.”
“Anywhere?”
“I'm practically offering myself up to you on a platter. Yes, Y/N. Everywhere’s fair game.”
You eye him for a little longer. He's not as big as he carried himself around to be.
As if sensing your unspoken realisation, he hurriedly explains, "I'm not completely hard yet.”
You nod, sympathetically. “Right, no I get it.”
“I’m serious, Y/N, stop looking at me like that.”
He grabs your hand and places it on his abs, ignoring your sudden squeak.
“You’re going to have to work to get me there.” He watches as you hesitate, his heartbeat quickening slightly under your touch.
“This seems less like teaching and more like you just wanting someone to get you off.”
“You’re learning.” Despite his teasing tone, he eases you closer to him. “Look, it’s not exactly rocket science and what I tell you probably won’t apply to everyone. But most guys are animals so if you can make them feel good then that’s all that matters. What's meta for most guys though is probably their neck and lower stomach. But you can start anywhere.”
His smirk falters just a tad when you explore, tentatively at first, palms sliding over his ribs and thumbs brushing his nipples until they pebble under your touch. Gojo’s breath hitches, but he keeps it together, murmuring encouragement. “I guess you could try there too. Fuck, this is kind of embarrassing. Can’t you be normal and go at my neck or something?”
“Your neck?” Your fingers slide up to touch him there but he laughs and gently brushes your hand away.
“Okay, don’t strangle me. When I say touch, I don't just mean with your fingers. You can touch your lips too, can’t you?”
You bite your lips and nod, wetting them quickly with your tongue. You lean in closer, your lips finding the pulse point of his neck. It's a quick peck at first, testing, and he just arches a brow, unimpressed.
Fine, challenge accepted.
You brace yourself on his shoulders and lick a slow stripe up the tendon, tasting salt and faint cologne which isn’t the best tasting thing in the world, so you nibble the skin. Gojo hums, head tilting to give you better access, and you dive in, sucking lightly, alternating with kisses that leave faint marks.
It’s heady, this rush of control. His bare chest radiates warmth against your arm, heavy breaths ghosting your ear as he lets you lead.
“Hungry, are you?” Gojo finds his footing against the absurd situation because if there’s one thing he knows, it’s receiving attention from pretty women. If he closes his eyes like so, focusing only on the cute licks against his neck, he can almost ignore the fact that it’s coming from you. “I'd be careful not to leave any marks. Girls get jealous easily, you know?”
You roll your eyes at his very unsexy comment. He's underestimating you, you’re sure he is, and you’re even more determined to prove him wrong.
You kiss down his neck, licking at the column of his neck, and when you find this soft patch of skin, pale under your lips and glimmering with a thin layer of sweat, you do what your instincts roar at you to do and bite him as he’s mid yapping.
“I never really let girls kiss me like this, so be grateful that I—ohfuck!”
Gojo’s reaction is immediate as a downright sinful moan escapes his pretty lips unchecked. His hands tighten in your hips, head dropping forward, panting as he catches his breath from the sudden sharp inhale.
You let go, licking at the mark left behind. “Oh, sorry. You don’t do marks, right?”
“That was…” He trails off, eyes dark as he holds you in his gaze. “Jesus, sweets, where did you even learn that kind of stuff?”
You shrug, letting him hold you back and feeling a little bit like a rabid animal. “It was just something I wanted to do. Was it bad? Did it hurt?”
“No, it was fine. Keep going just… use your hands a bit more too,” he hurries to add on, clearing his throat and loosening his hold on you. “It feels better if you use both your mouth and hands at the same time. Keep going, but don’t forget the rest of me.”
Finding no error in his words, you enthusiastically go back to kissing and sucking on his neck, tasting the salt of his sweat. Meanwhile, you slide your hands down his chest, marveling at how smooth he feels despite his muscle.
When you graze your finger tips between the medial line of his abs, you feel him shiver and you detach your lips from his neck to watch his eyes track your every move, hungry and unblinking.
“Atta girl,” he rasps, abs flexing under your palm and he shivers as you slide even further down, hand hovering his stomach. His cock visibly thickens in his boxers as you trace the ridges of his abs.“That’s it. Take your time, sweets. I'm not going anywhere.”
You never considered that Gojo would be so vocal during sex, not that this even counted as sex yet. If anything, that made you even more curious, wondering if he himself knew how much he was talking and how little any of it even meant. In case he didn’t, you didn’t dare talk in case it would break the spell.
Your fingers skim the waistband of his boxers and he sucks in a breath, voice dropping an octave.
“Fuck, yeah. That’s the spot.” The fabric tents fully now, his cock hard and straining, the tip outlined clearly. It's thicker than you expected, pulsing with need, and the sight sends a thrill straight to your core.
Gojo’s eyes flick between your hand and your face, flushed and focused. “See? told you it’d wake up. want to see all of it?”
You nod, eyes trained on his bulge.
He grins, taking your hands to hook your thumbs into the sides of his boxers. He helps you slightly though he lets you do most of the work. Emboldened, you tug the boxers down just enough to free his cock, watching it spring up, thicker now, veins prominent along the shaft, the head flushed and glistening with a bead of precum.
Your first words are, of course, very sexy.
“Oh damn.”
Gojo laughs breathlessly. For my own ego, I'm going to take that as a good thing.”
“It just doesn’t look how I expected it to.”
That makes him frown. He ducks his head to meet your gaze. “Hey. She has feelings too, you know. Don’t imply that she’s ugly, she’ll sag.”
“She?” It's so ridiculous you snort, the nervousness running away to let curiousity fuel your movements once again, fingers curling around his hot, velvety length. He's rock hard under your soft touch, precum slicking your palm as you pump him experimentally. Gojo groans low in his throat, head falling back against the couch.
“Shit, just like—ngh—that,” he grits out, voice wrecked. The sound hits you like a spark, raw and primal, making your thighs clench. “My—my dick has she/her pronouns. It’s 2026 now, get woke.”
Still looking at you, he takes your hand again, wrapping it around his shaft.
“Hold it properly. Feel how hot it is.”
He groans softly as you hold him, guiding your hand up and down in a slow stroke, pressing down where he’s sensitive just the way he likes it. “Squeeze gently and twist your wrist as you move.”
He demonstrates the twist motion, his large hand enveloping yours, precum beading at his tip from both the sight and feel of you.
He lets you go, leaning back on his elbows, enjoying the view of you jacking him off. “You’re a natural, keep going, just like that.”
His breathing becomes heavier, his abdomen tensing. He can’t help but buck slightly into your hand.
Despite his unattractive dirty talk, it doesn’t drive away the power you feel and it doesn’t take away from the sounds, the way his body trembles under your control. It's all so intoxicating, way better than any awkward fumble you’ve imagined with Geto late at night with your hands down your pants.
To shut him up, you squeeze a little tighter and he hisses, pulling you away.
“Slow down,” he pants, catching his breath. He closes his eyes for a moment before locking you in a fierce gaze. “Do you usually shove your finger inside when you’re dry?”
“What?”
“This is why lube exists, woman. God, my poor lady,” He looks up at you, eyes trailing down from your eyes to your lips.
“Please don’t refer to your dick as a lady.”
“I’ve gotten no complaints so far.” Gojo reaches up, tracing your bottom lip with his thumb, dragging it down slightly. “Have you ever spat on anyone?”
“Excuse me?” You look down at him as if he’s grown another head.
He lets out a strangled groan, hips bucking up under you. “Yeah, keep looking at me like that and spit on my dick. Give her the good old hawk tuah.”
Your grimace only grows and he bites his lip, the corners quirking up. “Please,” he whispers and you’ve lost.
The word hangs between you like a dare, his blue eyes locked on yours, all wide and pleading in a way that clashes hilariously with his usual attitude if the unsure quiver to his lips didn’t wreck you.
Gojo’s cock throbs in your loose grip, the head leaking more precum that drips down the shaft, making your fingers slick without even trying. You hesitate, face heating up at the sheer audacity, but the way his abs tense, the subtle roll of his hips begging for more, chips away at your resistance.
“Fine,” you mutter, rolling your eyes to mask the flutter in your stomach and you must have imagined the way he groans. “But just know I’m judging you the entire time.”
“Even better,” he moans.
You lean over him, one hand steadying on his thick thighs, firm muscle under smooth skin, and purse your lips as you spit on him. It’s awkward as hell, the glop of spit landing off-centre on the underside of his shaft, but you smear it around with your palm.
The glide turns smoother instantly, wet and filthy, your strokes picking up speed as his cock slicks up fully.
Gojo’s reaction is immediate, a deep, rumbling moan spills from his chest, his head knocking back against the couch with a thud, not that he notices. “Fuuuck, yes—that’s it, just like that.”
His hands fist the fabric of the couch on either side of his hips, knuckles white, like he’s fighting not to grab you and take over. But he doesn’t, he lets you work him, hips jerking up in shallow thrusts to meet your rhythm, the tip bumping your palm on every upstroke.
“Keep going, tighter… shit, you’re killing me here.”
The power rush hits you harder now, watching him come undone under your touch. His cock feels massive in your hand, thick and veined, pulsing hotly as you pump from base to tip, thumb swiping over the slit to collect more precum and spread it down. You can feel every ridge, every twitch, and it’s nothing like the vague fantasies you’d spun about Geto. This is real, messy, and way more intense. Your own arousal builds, thighs pressing together as you grind subtly against nothing, the heat between your legs turning insistent.
“Does it… feel good?” You ask, voice breathy and you slow your strokes just to tease, squeezing the base and watching in awe as a fresh bead of precum pearl at the head.
He cracks one eye open, gaze hazy and dark, lips parted in a pant. “Good? Sweets, don’t sell yourself short.”
A grin tugs at his mouth but it falters into a groan when you resume, faster now, the wet schlick of your hand echoing in the room causing you to squirm.
“Don’t stop,” he all but whines. “Gonna cum if you keep this up. Want me to, sweets? Want me to paint your hand or what?”
The crudeness should turn you off, but it doesn’t, it only amps up the thrill, making you bold. You nod, biting your lip as you lean closer, free hand bracing on his chest to feel his heart hammering.
“Yeah, do it. cum for me.”
Gojo’s control snaps like a rubber band. his moans pitch higher, body arching as his cock swells in your grip, veins bulging. “Fuck—fuck, can’t help it, I’m gonna—”
He bucks hard once, twice, and then he’s erupting, thick spurts of cum shooting from the tip to splatter your fingers, his stomach, even a streak across his abs. It's hot, sticky, rope after rope as you milk him through it, not knowing what else to do. You slow your strokes until he’s spent, twitching sensitively in your palm.
He slumps back, chest rising and falling like he ran a marathon, a lazy, disbelieving laugh bubbling out. He runs a hand down his face, groaning softly.
“I am…” He lets out another breathless laugh, head dropping back against the armrest of the couch. “So fucking washed. What the hell was that, sweets?”
You blink, a little dazed yourself. Your hand is still loosely wrapped around him, slick and messy, and only when his eyes flick down do you jolt and snatch your hand back like you’ve been burnt.
“I—I don’t know,” you mumble, gratefully accepting the tissue he hands you, awkwardly deciding to dab at his stomach and abs too, anywhere your eyes can safely land that isn’t his softening cock. “That was… hey, wait a minute. Shouldn’t i be asking you? What the hell was that spitting thing?”
He shrugs, your body moving with the motion as you remain on his lap. “I told you, there’s some things some guys like and some don’t. As a note of reference, maybe don’t spit on Suguru. You’ll kill his ego.”
He has the audacity to smirk at the thought considering the state of him, hair a mess, cheeks flushed, mouth pink and kiss-swollen from all the swearing and groaning.
“You're disgusting,” you accuse weakly, trying not to think about how he’d looked under you a few seconds ago, jaw slack, eyes glazed, like you’d wrung the soul out of him.
“Mmm.” His gaze drags over your face, down the line of your throat, lingering a beat too long at your chest before he drags it back up. “So, how are you feeling after all that?”
“Embarrassed,” you say immediately.
“But kinda turned on, too?” he guesses, just as fast.
Your mouth drops open. “I did not say that.”
“Don’t have to,” he says, maddening. “You’re still sitting on me, you know.”
You freeze. You're still straddling his lap, knees planted on either side of his thighs on the couch, hips pressed to his, fingers bunched at his stomach. You'd be so focused on that scrunched up look on his face when he came that you kind of forgot to be mortified about the position.
Now you remember.
“I was busy,” you mutter, shifting like you’re about to climb off.
His hands come up automatically, one at your waist, one braced at your hip, holding you there without quite pulling you back down. “Hey, hey. I didn't say you had to move.”
“But you’re all…” you wave a hand vaguely at his lap, face burning. “Post-nut clarity or whatever. You should be resting or something.”
“That’s hilarious, do you think I’m an old man?” He huffs a laugh. “If my stamina lasted one puny handjob I would never show my face anywhere. Hey, don’t glare at me like that. you know what that does to me. you glaring at me and spitting on my cock while you jerk me off—fuck.”
“Don't say it like that,” you hiss, heat flooding your chest. “You literally told me to.”
“And you did so good,” he croons. “Look at you, all flustered now. You were seconds away from calling me pathetic, you know.”
“How are you turning this on me? You’re the one that liked it,” you shoot back, shoulder tensing.
His fingers flex at your waist, like he’s remembering it. “Yeah. I really, really did.”
The way he says it sends a tiny shiver through you. You feel ridiculously aware of yourself suddenly, of your damp palms on his chest, of the way your thighs are pressed around him, of the restless thrum under your skin you’ve been trying not to notice since he first groaned for you.
You shift again, intending to put some space between you, and hiss as the movement drags you a little too firmly against him, sparking through the ache low in your belly.
You go very still and so does he.
His eyes flicker, dropping for a fraction of a second to the point where your hips meet his. You can feel the change in him, no longer wrecked and loose-limbed, but sharpened like he’s honing in on every tiny flinch.
“Oh,” he says softly. “Feeling something, sweets?”
“Don’t start,” you warn, feeling every urge to catapult yourself off his lap. His hand tightens on your waist, thumbs rubbing absent circles, maddeningly casual. “Can you let me go already?”
“But it’s not over yet, are you sure you want to miss the best part? If I said I wanted to make it your turn, would you say no?”
The question hangs between you, heavier than his usual teasing.
“This isn’t… about that.”
“Sure it is,” he whispers, lips curved into a wicked grin. “You wanna learn how to make a guy feel good right? Then you also need to know what you like. If you know what works for you, it’s easier to tell him what works for him.”
Has Gojo always been so reasonable?
“Besides,” he continues when you’re not rushing to sign up to his touch. “I’m being selfless here. You can’t seriously think I'd let you walk out of here without repaying the favour first, right?”
“Way to sound like a douche.” You swat at his chest, a weak attempt to appear levelheaded.
“How else am I supposed to say it?” He laughs softly, catching your wrist but not pushing it away, thumb stroking over your pulse. “I want to touch you. properly. Can I?”
Your stomach swoops.
“Just to know what it feels like?”
“Exactly.” His smile goes crooked at the edges. “Now you’re getting it.”
You stare at him, breathing shallow. Your heart is thudding way too fast. you’re hyperaware of your own body again, of the way your panties stick uncomfortably, of the restless ache that’s only been getting worse, of how easy it would be to fall into his tempting embrace.
“Hey, come back to me,” Gojo murmurs. “We don't have to do anything you don’t want. I promise I'm not a dick. So? What do you want, sweets?”
You look down at where his hands rest, big and warm on your hips, fingers flexing like he’s trying very hard to stay put.
You could say no, you know that. He'd let you hop off, probably make a dumb joke to break the tension, and the both of you can go back to pretending the constant physical touch is driving you up the wall. But you also know your legs are still a little unsteady, and that every time you shift you have to bite back a sound you really don’t want him to hear.
You swallow, hard.
“You have to listen,” you say finally. “If I say stop, you stop. and none of your stupid comments either.”
His expression sobers instantly, hands jumping a little at your hips. “Promise. Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.”
“I’m telling you, when you say shit like that, everything goes back inside.”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it, you want me quiet. So can I touch you or are you going to keep torturing us both?”
“You deserve the torture,” you grumble, then quieter, “But, yeah. okay.”
He hums. “Not good enough. Say it again?”
You bite back a complaint. “I want you to…touch me.”
It comes out barely more than a whisper, but it hits him like a truck. His eyes darken, lashes lowering as he sucks in a breath. One moment you’re straddling him, the next he’s sat up and turned you around so your back leans against his chest, his breath tickling your neck.
“You don’t know what you do to me,” he groans, hands sliding down to your stomach. His fingers play with the hem, nails barely grazing your bare skin. “Can I?”
You shiver, looking down to watch his hands with anticipation. Swallowing, you brace yourself and nod.
“Good girl,” he breathes.
His hand trails under your shirt, fingertips tracing nonsense shapes on your skin. He doesn’t go straight where you know you’re aching for him to go. Instead, he takes his time, mapping out the sensitive spots he finds, where your muscles jump when he squeezes, lowering his hand to where your breath stutters when he drags his knuckles along the inside of your thigh.
“You're wound so tight,” he murmurs, half to himself. “Relax for me, Y/N.”
“Shut up and stop teasing,” you hiss, and then gasp when his hand finally slips higher, brushing over the edge of your waistband.
“Is that a no?” He asks instantly, stilling.
]You want to throttle him. “I’m just… nervous.”
“Of course you are,” he says, voice going stupidly soft in your ear, hands playing with the fabric. “The first time’s always weird. But it doesn’t have to be bad-weird.”
He slowly slips his hand under the band, feeling you go still.
“Hey.” He presses his lips to your hair, mumbling soft words of praise. “You're okay, you’re doing good. Just breathe for me.”
You do, albeit shakily, his fingertips brushing the damp centre of your panties.
“You’re already… Jesus," he says quickly. “I really did a number on you, huh? And without even touching you, too.”
“If you don’t shut up, I'm leaving,” you threaten weakly.
He chuckles, guiding your attention away. Gojo slides your shorts down so you can see exactly where his fingers press against, a rush of heat flooding your cheeks at the sight of his thick fingers prodding against the backdrop of the panties you chose out this morning. If you knew something like this would happen, you would have worn something else.
Gojo thankfully doesn’t comment on it. Instead, he slowly explores, no sudden movements, no overwhelming pressure, just the occasional slide against your clit.
“Okay?” he asks, and you realise you’ve gone silent, holding your breath again.
“Yeah,” you gasp. “Just feel different than—nevermind.”
“Different good?” He prompts, thumb pressing down on your clit and you jolt, an audible inhale escaping you.
You feel his arms tighten around you.
“Oh, there we go,” he mutters, sounding ridiculously pleased with himself. “That got you.”
You don’t dignify that with an answer, not that you have the capacity to because the next moment, he’s moving his fingers with practiced purpose. His thumb circles your swollen clit through the damp fabric, the barrier muffling any sharp pleasure though it helps you wrap your head around the sensation.
When you start lifting your hips to meet his touch, he knows he has you where he wants you.
With his other fingers, he slowly slides your panties to the sides and touches you directly. The effect is immediate, your eyes snap down to watch, body tensing, want like you’ve never known it before shocking you.
The sight of your own arousal makes you wetter and he abandons his touch to touch you directly.
“Look at that,” he coos in your ear, voice breathy with awe and smug satisfaction. “Here you were acting like you wanted to leave when you’re this wet. Thought I wouldn't know, sweets? That I couldn't see you eye my dick all hungry like that?”
He emphasises his words with a harsh pinch of your clit and your head falls back to rest on his shoulders with a filthy moan ripped from your throat, raw and unprocessed.
Gojo takes the chance to kiss your neck.
You should hit him for his words, you really should. But instead, your hand flies up to his forearm, nails digging in when he slides a finger to circle your entrance and the world briefly whites out.
He groans quietly, like your reaction is doing something to him. “That’s—fuck, you’re so cute. Do that again.”
“Don’t tease,” you say again, voice barely there and brain too mushy to think of something original.
And like he knows, Gojo slowly slides a finger into your pussy and the pressure temporarily pushes out all of the pleasure. But then his free hand is playing with your clit and he’s telling you how good you are and how pretty you sound, and it comes back.
He thrusts that finger in and out slowly, letting you adjust to the intrusion and when you’re sighing soft moans and broken demands again, he curls it and doesn’t stop moving. He could easily overpower you, could pin you down and take, take, take, but he doesn’t. Every time you tense like you might pull away, he backs off just enough, murmuring at your ear, though by the time you’re close you haven’t panicked in a while.
He’s the one breathing hard when you start to chase your peak, like he’s the one being touched.
You’re writhing now, his arms having to tighten around you to keep you still as he slides another finger inside.
“That’s it,” he whispers, panting when your thighs clamp around his hand, head tipped back on his shoulders and eyes starting to roll back. “There you go. I've got you. Let go for me, yeah? Doing so good for me, sweets.”
“S-Satoru,” you choke out, the name ripped from somewhere deep.
His whole body jolts behind you and you feel a twitch near your ass.
“Oh, fuck,” he groans, like you’ve done something filthy. “Say my name like that again, I swear to god—”
You don’t because suddenly, you’re gone.
His fingers pressed against the spongy spot inside, his thumb circling your clit, and suddenly everything tightens then snaps and you’re tumbling, shaking around the steady anchor of his hand and his arm and his voice in your ear. He doesn’t speed up, letting you ride your orgasm on his hand, mumbling sweet nothings against your sweaty neck.
It’s messy and overwhelming and a little scary for a second, then his palm is flat over your lower stomach, grounding you as waves of sensation roll through your body. His other hand finally gentles and you can breathe again.
When you finally slump back against him boneless, the room feels dimmer. your chest heaves, skin prickling with aftershocks that he guides you through.
He eases his hand away and wipes it on his pants, keeping you steady on his lap.
“Hey,” he says softly, lips brushing your hairline. “You still with me?”
You nod, or at least you try to. “I think so.”
“Yeah?” He presses, smiling against your skin.
“Yeah.”
“Good.” he exhales like he’s been holding his breath with you. “You did amazing, sweets.”
“You're making me sound like a dog.”
“Well, you were very obedient,” he says lightly, then winces. “Okay, that sounded kinda bad.”
He huffs a quiet laugh, the sound rumbling through his chest where you’re still half-leaning against him. One of his hands comes up, hovering for a second like he isn’t sure if touching you again is allowed, then settles gently at your side.
You catch your breath, stealing a glance. His hair is a mess, cheeks flushed, eyes still blown wide but there’s something softer around the edges, so different from his usual cocky composure that it does something strange to your chest.
“You're the worst,” you mumble, just to say something.
“Oh?” his brows lift. “You seemed pretty satisfied with the lesson.”
You keep your mouth shut because there is absolutely no winning that argument.
Silence falls, not heavy nor awkward, but certainly unfamiliar. Without the distraction of movement or adrenaline, your mind starts spinning into the consequences of your actions.
And the fact that you’re still sitting between his thighs.
You stiffen and he notices immediately.
“Uh. Do you… want to—”
“Yes,” you say at the exact same time he says, “We should probably—”
You both stop, voice overlapping as you tell each other to continue then stop again. It’s funny if not awkward and you laugh, startled and breathless.
“Okay,” he says, hands lifting slightly in surrender. “You first.”
“No, you go,” you insist, scrambling upright a little too fast. The room tilts for half a second and you grab his thigh to steady yourself.
His hands hover again, then settle at your waist just in case.
“Careful,” he murmurs. “You’re still a little… y’know?”
You straighten and stand away from the couch, legs wobbling in a way you pretend not to notice. The cool air hits your skin and reality comes rushing back in a tidal wave of embarrassment.
Your skirt rests on your thighs but they’re crumpled, and your hair is surely a mess.
Gojo watches, biting his lip hard enough to leave teeth marks. He stands too, running a hand through his hair, suddenly looking almost shy as he grabs his discarded shirt and pulls it back on.
For a moment, neither of you know where to look.
You fixate on a crack in the wall and he studies the floor.
“Do you, uh… want me to walk you back?”
The normalcy of the question feels surreal.
“I’m fine with walking,” you say quickly. “The weather’s nice so.”
“Yeah,” he nods. “Fresh air. Definitely.”
You grab your bag with fumbling hands, nearly knocking it off the couch in the process. He catches it before it hits the floor, fingers brushing yours again as he hands it over.
Neither of you pull away immediately. Then, you both do at the same time.
“Right,” you say.
“Right,” he echoes.
He opens the door for you, peeking into the hallway first before gesturing.
“You sure you don’t want me to walk you back?”
You almost cry at the visual of a way out. “No, no, I'm fine. It’s not too far anyway.”
Gojo studies your face like he’s trying to decide whether to argue or not. For once, he doesn’t look like he’s in on some big secret. He just looks uncertain.
“If you say so,” he mutters, stepping aside.
You slip past him into the hallway, letting out a big sigh of relief when you hear the door close gently behind you with a soft click. Looking over your shoulder, you see Gojo follow you out anyway.
Your feet slow. “You don’t have to, I'm really okay.”
“I’m not,” he says quickly, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I’m just heading in the same direction. That's all. What a coincidence?”
“Uh-huh.”
The staircase is only a few doors down, but the short walk stretches, each step heavy with things unsaid. You can hear voices downstairs, life continuing on, oblivious.
At the top of the stairwell, you stop.
“Are we still going the same way?”
He shakes his head.
“I’ll see you around,” you settle on when the silence stretches.
“See you, Y/N.”
You take one step down, then another. After a third, you glance back.
Gojo is still there, watching. your chest does something uncomfortable as he waits.
“Goodnight, Satoru,” you say softly.
He blinks, like the name catches him off guard every time. Then he smiles, small but warm.
“Night, sweets.”
When you reach the bottom and push out into the night air, it feels shockingly cool against your overheated skin. The campus is quiet, streetlights painting everything gold and shadowed, the distant sound of traffic humming like white noise.
You walk faster than necessary because if you slow down, the thoughts will quickly flood in. And if you start thinking, you might realise that somewhere between asking him for help and leaving his room tonight, something has gone very, very wrong.
You’re not sure why you care so much.
You tell yourself it’s because Geto will be there, because this is a chance to make a real impression, because this is what all of it has been building toward. But as you stand in front of your mirror, turning this way and that, smoothing imaginary wrinkles, adjusting your hair for the third time, checking your reflection from angles no one in real life would ever see, you realise this isn’t normal.
You’ve never put this much thought into a “casual” outing before.
Not the outfit, carefully balanced between cute and effortless, like you didn’t spend forty minutes deciding between two nearly identical tops just for the jersey to cover it anyway. Not the makeup, soft enough to look natural, deliberate enough to feel like armor. Not the way your stomach flips every time you picture stepping into the arena.
You know deep down this isn’t about Geto. That thought alone makes your chest feel tight.
You grab your purse before you can overthink it further and leave.
When you walk into the arena, the roar of the crowd hits you like a physical force, loud and electric, buzzing with anticipation and cheer. It bleeds through the concrete walls, through your bones, and through the floor beneath your shoes.
The game hasn’t officially started yet, you made sure to come before then, but the energy is already at a fever pitch.
Your eyes sweep the rink automatically, searching. And you spot him immediately.
Gojo, in his navy and white jersey, skates across the ice like it belongs to him, like the rink exists solely to accommodate his momentum. It doesn't seem to matter that his helmet obscures most of his face, you’d recognise him anywhere. the easy confidence in the way he moves, the loose, effortless posture, the casual speed that looks like he isn’t even trying—it’s unmistakable.
His hair, damp under his helmet, peeks out in soft white tufts. His cheeks are slightly flushed from exertion, breath fogging faintly in the cold air as he glides past teammates, exchanging easy shoves and taps of sticks. He's the easiest person in the world to look at and the hardest to look away from.
He glances up towards the stands during warm-ups, scanning lazily, and your heart stutters. You freeze, suddenly aware of yourself, of the crowd, of how ridiculous it is to hope he’ll notice you among hundreds of people wearing the same colours.
I mean, all these people? All wearing the team jersey? And you wouldn’t call yourself beautiful, not in the kind of way that makes someone stand out across a packed arena, and certainly not in a way that draws eyes automatically, not—
Gojo turns a little more. and then his eyes meet yours.
The jolt is instantaneous, sharp and electric, like touching a live wire. Your breath catches, lungs forgetting their purpose entirely as a stupid, bright grin spreads across his face.
A strange warmth floods your chest, blooming outward until it feels too big to contain. You bite your lip, trying and failing, to suppress your own giddy smile as you tug lightly at the hem of your jersey, lifting it just enough to show the number at the front and point at it.
06.
If it's even possible, his grin widens. He spins around without hesitation, and easily mind you, skating backward for a few seconds just to show off the back of his own jersey, jabbing a glove thumb at the matching number with pride.
Heat rushes to your face.
It's ridiculous, childish even, but your heart is pounding and the warmth in your chest swells until it’s almost overwhelming.
When warm-ups end, he lifts his stick in your direction in one last, unmistakable acknowledgement before skating toward the bench, where his teammates swarm him instantly. One of them hooks an arm around his neck, dragging him down while another plays bongos on his helmet, elbows digging into his ribs.
From this distance you can’t hear what they’re saying, but you don’t need to. His expression gives everything away, the wide grin and mock protests, and the way he shoves them back half-heartedly while still laughing.
Someone whistles, another bumps his shoulder and one even points toward the stands, toward you. Your stomach flips.
“Y/N?”
You start, tearing your eyes away as if caught doing something incriminating. Geto stands beside you, already holding two drinks, his expression warm and easy.
“Hey,” he says, offering you one. “You made it. I found seats over here, it’s a pretty good view, if I don’t say so myself. We should head over before the game starts.”
You take the cup automatically, fingers brushing his. “Thanks!”
He smiles, guiding you through the rows of people with gentle awareness, making space and steadying you when someone brushes past too close. It's thoughtful and careful and exactly the kind of thing that made you fall for him in the first place.
Once seated, conversation comes easily to him. It’s all polite small talk and soft jokes, quiet observations about the team and season. He fills in the silence like Gojo had predicted, never letting it become uncomfortable. He does all the right things that you could almost tick them off a list. He laughs at your comments like they’re genuinely funny and asks questions that make it clear he’s paying attention.
It should be perfect, it should be everything you’ve ever wanted.
And yet, your eyes drift back to the rink, to the flashes of navy and white.
To the tall figure leaning against the boards, helmet off now, shaking his hair as he listens to a coach, nodding absentmindedly while his gaze flicks upward.
Your pulse jumps when his eyes land on you again. Except this time he doesn’t grin. It might be your imagination but he seemingly looks to Geto beside you, then back, just watching.
You force yourself to look back at Geto, nodding at something he just said, hoping your smile looks natural and not strained.
The game starts fast.
Faster than you expected, faster than anything you’ve watched on TV, faster than seems physically possible for men balancing on thin blades over frozen water. The pluck drops and suddenly the rink explodes with motion, bodies colliding, sticks clashing, skates carving violent crescents into the ice.
You lost track of the puck almost immediately.
Geto leans closer, voice raised just enough to carry over the roar of the crowd. “Watch Satoru, he plays center so he’ll usually be in there.”
Your eyes find him easily.
He moves differently from everyone else, you see, loose, flashier, or maybe that’s just you. No, you reject that notion as he accelerates in bursts, gliding between players with impossible precision, stick tapping the ice impatiently when he doesn’t have the puck.
Every time he skates past your side of the rink, your chest tightens and your throat hurts a little more as you try to cheer louder.
The first goal goes to the other team.
Your side of the arena groans as one, a wave of disappointment that rattles through the stands. You feel it too, a sinking drop in your stomach, though you don’t fully understand the play that led to it.
Gojo slams his stick once against the ice in frustration, then shoves off hard, jaw set.
Geto doesn’t seem worried. “They’ll bounce back. Satoru is the best they have, after all.”
Just like he predicted, they do. Midway through the second period, one of Gojo’s teammates manages to slip the puck past the goalie, and the building detonates. People surge to their feet to cheer and you find yourself in that crowd, cheering without thinking, adrenaline crackling through your veins like you personally contributed.
On the ice, Gojo grabs the scorer by the shoulders and shakes him, helmet bumping into helmet, grin blinding even through the cage.
It’s a tie game until it’s not. Another goal to the opposing side which Gojo’s team equalising moments after. Again and again, a tense back and forth that even has Geto inhaling sharply at moments.
By the third period, your nails are dug into the flimsy paper cup in your hand, ice long melted into a yucky watered down version of whatever was in the drink. You barely notice when Geto takes it from you and sets it aside so you don’t crush it completely.
The scoreboard reads 3-3 and the clock tells you there’s two minutes left.
The noise is deafening now, frantic and desperate, every movement on the ice met with gasps or shouts.
Gojo has long since lost the playful edge from earlier. He circles near centre ice, knees bent, weight forward, eyes tracking the puck like it’s the only thing that exists in the world. A defender tries to box him out and he shrugs him off with a brutal shoulder check that makes the crowd howl.
The puck slides loose along the boards, ricocheting off a tangle of skates and sticks like it has a mind of its own. Someone on Gojo’s team snatches it first and fires it forward, a risky pass that slides clean across open ice, and towards him.
Gojo receives it in stride, blade cushioning the impact with effortless control. He doesn’t even glance down. his head is already up, scanning his way forward. A defender lunges for him and he slips past with a sharp pivot, hips twisting, edges biting deep into the ice.
You’re on your feet before you realise you’ve moved.
“Go—!” you scream and like a domino effect, people around you start to cheer.
Gojo fakes a left. The goalie commits.
He snaps right, dragging the puck across his body in one powerful motion, forcing the goalie to witness the outplay. And then he flicks his wrist and a sharp crack echoes across the rink.
The puck lifts, a black blur slicing through air, threading the narrowest gap between glove and shoulder, and slams into the back of the net.
For half a heartbeat, there is silence. Then the buzzer screams and the crowd erupts.
Sound crashes over you in a tidal wave, screaming, stomping, clapping, the metallic rattle of the stands shaking under hundreds of pounding feet. You’re shouting too, throat tearing with it, hands flying to your mouth before dropping again because you need them free to clap and wave, anything to release all this energy exploding out of you.
Down on the ice, Gojo throws his head back and roars, pure exhilaration bursting out of him. His teammates collide with him seconds later, swarming him in a pile of navy and white, shoving his helmet and grabbing his shoulders, almost knocking him over in their celebration.
He's laughing.
Even through the cage, from the distance, you can see it, the wild brightness in his eyes and the way his chest heaves with adrenaline.
They won.
They actually won.
You’re bouncing on your toes without realising, hands clasped in front of your mouth.
Gojo breaks free from the pile just enough to turn and look up into the stands. It's easier finding you this time around when he knows where to look.
His whole face lights up, grin splitting wide and unrestrained, so bright it feels like it could blind you, he lifts his stick and points it straight at you then thumps it once against the ice in a triumphant salute.
Your stomach swoops violently.
You laugh, breathless and giddy, lifting both hands to wave back like an idiot. Your body is already leaning forward, feet shifting as instinct screams for you to move. To go down there, to be closer, to meet him at the glass while he’s still glowing with victory looking as beautiful as you’ve ever seen him, so alive that it radiates off him in waves.
You want to throw your arms around his neck.
You want to tell him that was incredible.
You want—
“Y/N?”
Geto’s voice cuts gently through the chaos, close to your ear.
You blink, tearing your gaze away from the ice to find him watching you with a small, amused smile.
“That was intense,” he says, laughter in his voice. “I forgot how crazy these games get at the end. Makes you glad you came, right?”
“Yeah,” you breathe, though it comes out shaky and raw from all the cheering. “Yeah it was. Definitely.”
Your eyes flick down despite yourself and find Gojo still looking up, smile dimmed.
Geto gestures toward the aisle. “If we leave now, we can beat the post-game crowd. The bookstore’s only a short walk away anyway. We can find Satoru after he comes out.”
The words land heavy in your chest. How could you forget? There was a plan in action, the reason why you came, the person you’re supposed to be focusing on.
“Right,” you say, though your voice sounds far away even to your own ears.
On the ice, Gojo’s teammates are tugging him toward the bench, shouting in his ear and shoving him here and there. He goes easily enough, though not without one last glance at you. He tilts his chin, a silent question in your eyes, clear despite the distance.
Are you going?
Your fingers curl into fists at your side.
“Ready?” Geto asks softly.
You swallow. “... yeah.”
But as you turn to follow him up the aisle, the roar of the arena swelling behind you, you can’t shake that you’ve made the wrong decision. You feel it, that strange, electric thread stretching thinner and thinner behind you as the tunnel swallows Gojo whole.
BUZZWORD
It should be fun.
Geto is easy to talk to, he’s polite, thoughtful and gentle, and all the right things. You trail behind him between the shelves as he talks about a book he likes, or some theory he discovered that explains so much and makes so much sense.
You try, you really do. You nod your head and attempt to store that information away.
But everything just doesn’t feel right. It's hard to store that information away when your head is full of that look Gojo had given you, the way his white hair had stuck out from under his helmet, damp from the effort and glory of winning, eyes sparkling under the stadium lights, the way he had lifted his stick to point at you.
Geto is kind. But your tastes don’t match. Your jokes land in different places. He's nice, and you do enjoy his conversation. But not in the same way you had enjoyed Gojo’s company that day in the cafe.
You don’t feel nervous. You don’t feel excited. Honestly, you just feel like pretending.
And as if the universe is screaming at you about something just beyond your grasp, when you reach for the same book, your fingers don’t brush. And you don’t want them to.
Geto’s phone buzzes when he’s in the middle of explaining some theories from this guy called Slavoj Zizek? He winces at whatever he reads.
“Sorry,” he starts, sounding genuinely apologetic. “I need to head out. But hey, here–” He pulls a paperback off the shelf and hands it to you. “This is the one I was talking about. I think you’ll like it.”
you accept it automatically. “Thanks,” you say, and then he’s waving and gone the next moment, door swinging behind him.
For a while, you wander the bookstore in an attempt to rationalise the complex emotions warring inside you. Geto is your crush. You know this. And yet, it all feels so superficial. Gojo had been right, there was nothing personal about the things you liked about him to explain the crush.
You stand in the quiet of the aisle, holding a book you frankly don’t care about, surrounded by a silence that feels like the wrong choice made tangible long after the last customer walks out. Heavy rain falls outside, pelting against the roof of the store, a steady white noise that backgrounds your thoughts.
When the bookstore begins to close, you’re ushered outside. You swear as you’re suddenly caught in the harsh weather and through the heavy sheets of rain, there looks to be no other store open. Hastily, you run out in the rain to find some place where you can get cover over your head. Finally, you see a small awning from a closed shop.
You run under the awning, hugging your arms to your chest as you wait out the storm, feeling stupidly alone and stupidly unsure why you’re this upset. This is what you wanted right? But the part of your heart that has always known the truth traitorously voices the thoughts you’ve been pushing down all this time.
Gojo.
Through the sheets of heavy rain, someone is running towards you. Tall, white hair, still in his jersey, his hair now damp (read: soaked) with rain water rather than sweat.
He skids under the awning, breathless, terribly drenched, an unopened umbrella in one hand.
“What the hell,” he says immediately, voice sharp with concern and frustration. “Are you trying to get pneumonia? Why didn’t you go home? Didn’t you check the weather? It clearly said it was going to rain today!”
You blink, gaping at his sudden presence. “What are you, no, why are you here? Shouldn’t you be celebrating?”
He snorts. “Yeah, I was. Until Suguru texted. Said he left you at the bookstore and for me to pick you up. Seriously, you didn’t even bring an umbrella?”
The situation finally catches up to you and you frantically gesture to his own umbrella. “How can you lecture me when you just ran out all the way here without opening your umbrella? it’s literally in your hands, all you had to do was open it!”
“Like i had the time to! My legs are literally burning from the game and you made me run all this way out to save you!”
“I never asked you to!”
“Well, I had to!” He steps closer, finally freeing himself from the rain completely. His presence fills up the cramped space under the awning and you catch a whiff of cedar and sweat. “I couldn’t just let you die out here in the cold!”
Speechless, you open and close your mouth like an idiot. Finally, you manage to ask, “How did you even know I was out here?”
“Weren’t you listening? I told you Suguru told me he ditched you!”
At Geto’s name, your face falls. Ah, right. your little moral dilemma about Geto.
Gojo also calms down a little, his chest heaving a little slower as he uses the silence to catch his breath. his eyes scan your expression, picking up on the way you bite your lip, eyes looking away.
“Hey,” he says, voice soft though still strained. “You okay?”
Your throat tightens. “I guess? I don't know. Look, sorry. I appreciate you coming.”
“Don't give me that. Just don’t. You’ve told me every embarrassing thing about yourself when you outed that you, you know, like Suguru. Don’t hide something from me now. Are you upset that he left?” His hand comes out to wipe water off your cheek. “Don't cry.”
You scrunch up your face in mild disgust. “I’m not? That's literally just rain water.”
“Oh. So you're okay?”
You inhale and let it out slowly. Were you okay? You shouldn’t be, not if Geto was your crush and he just ditched you. And yet, under Satoru’s shadow as he stands in front of you, blocking the rain, brows furrowed and lips pressed tight as he looks you over in concern, you find yourself feeling okay. More than okay.
“Why do you even like him?” He asks, quietly, a question that would have easily been lost to the rain if you weren’t hanging off his every word.
“I told you,” you start, just as quiet. “He saved me that one time.”
“Yeah?” He opens the umbrella with one hand, and holds your hand in the other, gently guiding you out from under the awning. Rain hits heavy against the fabric and he holds you close to keep you out from the storm, your chest grazing his. “He saved you that day in the rain, did he?”
You swallow. “Yeah.”
“Just like this?”
Mutely, you nod. In his arms, you barely notice the slight chill.
Gojo searches your eyes for something. He exhales, long and uneven, like he’s been holding this in for longer than he’s willing to admit. And yet, he doesn’t shy away, doesn’t tear his gaze away from yours, just keeps holding the umbrella over your head, tilted ever so slightly in your direction such that you’re completely covered.
“That day,” he says, quiet but steady, “When you got caught in the rain after that stupid orientation thing? Suguru wasn’t on campus. He went back home for a month before the semester started and didn’t come back until the second week. I was the one that found you.”
Your breath falters. “What? But he… he gave me his hoodie. His name was on the tag.”
“Yeah,” Satoru laughs, a single disbelieving puff. “I was wearing his hoodie. He wasn’t at the dorms so I stole some of his clothes to wear. It’s whatever, he steals some of mine sometimes. The point is, I was the one that helped you.”
For a moment, you stop breathing entirely. The rain pours around the two of you, a curtain of noise, but it’s silent under the umbrella.
You’ve never seen Gojo so nervous. Definitely not before the big game earlier, not on any of the practice dates, never when he talks to a group of people. Between the two of you, nervousness came more naturally to you. And yet, standing before you vulnerable, wet lashes stuck together, cheeks flushed from running and is that a faint bruise forming on his jaw? He looks nervous and it’s a sight that sends warmth all over your face.
His eyes are unbearably soft as he waits for your verdict.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Your voice sounds too small.
“Because you thought it was Suguru. Because you liked him. And back then, I didn't realise that I wanted you to know it was me.”
Your heart thuds, something a little more daring saying the next few words for you. “And now?”
This moment was perfect. The two of you had been slowly closing that small gap of distance, eyes seeing nothing but each other and suddenly all those rom coms and kdramas come to mind. All those scenes of first kisses (forgetting the practices because those didn’t include real romance), all those late night conversations with Shoko about what it’s like, they all come and leave your brain.
But instead of leaning in and sealing the deal, Gojo’s entire body suddenly stiffens. His arm around you loosens, placing more distance between the two of you.
What the hell?
His gaze drops a little further before coming back up with a discipline that can only come from reciting the digimon opening theme over and over in his head. “Now I'm trying really, really hard not to stare at you.”
Curious, you look down to your soaked shirt where the fabric clings painfully close, embarrassingly sheer. It only serves to emphasise the lines of your bra and though you can’t really see anything, Gojo’s face is flushed pink not just from exertion, and his jaw is tight.
“Satoru—”
“My place,” he blurts. “We should, uh, get you warmed up. Your shirt is literally see-through and if I have to keep pretending I don't notice, I'm going to walk myself right into traffic.”
“That is so dramatic.” The beginnings of a smile cause the corner of your lips to quiver upwards at his flustered state.
“i’m dramatic,” he insists, voice strained, still not looking. “Now come on. I still don’t want you catching pneumonia out here and Sig Kap is literally right near the gate. We can keep talking there when you don’t look like a puppy left out in the rain.”
“Says you.” You eye his white hair plastered to his forehead and smile, reaching up to move a few clinging strands from his eyes. “But okay. I’d like that a lot.”
Unfortunately, the gesture makes him look back down at you, inevitably making him catch an eyeful of your chest. He closes his eyes. “Let's just go before I give you this umbrella and walk onto the road.”
You laugh a little. “Geez, you really are dramatic.”
He walks you to Sig Kap, refusing to stand fully under the umbrella. When you try to grab his arm and pull him under, he only launches into a talk about being a feminist and how chivalry isn’t dead and how much he hates periods and loves matcha. You laugh and he smiles down at you before looking away. Seriously, he needs to get over that.
At the door outside the house, Gojo stops you.
“Here.” he hands you the umbrella, fingers brushing yours, before reaching down to take his jersey off. You instinctively blush and look away, but considering your state of undress it would only be fair if you stole a glance. So you peek at him from the corner of your eyes.
You only manage to look just below his abs when something warm and slightly damp flops over your head.
“Hey!”
He takes the umbrella back from you, standing in front of you and covering your back with the umbrella.. “Put that on before we head inside. Take your wet jersey off, hurry.”
Feeling warm despite the rain, you hastily pull off your soaked top, making sure he’s looking politely away, and throw his jersey on. It’s still damp but not as drenched as your own. Looking down, it falls past your skirt and just above your knees.
“You’re going to walk in shirtless?”
“Better than you walking in looking like that.” He doesn’t give you a moment to think about his words. “Come on, you’re going to catch a cold.”
He leads you to the now familiar front door and when it opens before Gojo can even touch the doorknob, you understand the reasoning of his actions.
“Dude!” Hikari cheers, wrapping an arm round Gojo’s shoulders and eagerly pulling him in despite his grunt of protest. “Congrats on the win, man!”
Hikari quickly notices your presence.
“Oh. So you’re already celebrating, huh?”
Gojo brushes past him, his hand holding tours to guide a path through the sweaty frat boys. “Shut it, Hikari. Is Sukuna in?”
“Nah. The whole floor’s gone.” Hikari answers, raising his voice as Gojo quickly places distance between him and you.
When the door of his room closes behind you both, he turns and pulls you in, his hand falling down on your hips, pulling you close. You both look like wet dogs but you couldn’t care less.
“Sorry about them,” he mumbles against your hair.
“It’s fine,” you pause. “Who's Sukuna?”
“The guy in the room next to mine.”
“Oh.”
He hesitates, searching your eyes in the dark of his room. The storm rages on beyond his window, rain entering through a slightly ajar window, but neither of you make the responsible move to close it. Instead, you find yourself pressing up against him, hoping for more.
“Sweets,” he says, his voice low. “Please don’t tell me this is still practice.”
“It’s not.”
He takes a deep breath in. “You piss me off. You’re annoying, and insistent, and you always get what you want.”
You frown a little. “Hold on, I thought this was going a different way.”
He shushes you by placing a finger against your lips. “You never listen to me and you never act how I think you will. You’re definitely not normal and your thoughts are all weird and messed up. But you’re always in my head and you have the prettiest smile and the softest voice and when you tell me to shut up I want to drop to my knees and lick your feet.”
“Okay, it’s definitely getting weird now.”
“I think I’m seriously doomed,” he whispers despite your protests. “Because I bought that coffee you gave me months ago and I still drank it even though I hated how it tasted. And I haven’t been able to get it up without thinking about you and those pretty lips.”
“Now I see why you don’t do relationships.”
Gojo chuckles, eyes unbearingly soft. “I think I’m in love with you, Y/N. You’re all I can think about.”
You let out a slow exhale.
This was not how you imagined any of this. That day when you sat down with Shoko to plan a devious scheme to get with Geto, you naturally assumed it would end with him by your side, or with a crippling inability to reassimilate with society.
Never in a million years did you think you’d be here, in Gojo’s enormous room inside a frat house, him hanging off your every word.
But thinking on it now, there’s nothing you want to change in your plan.
“I think I’m in love with you too,” you say just as quietly, a smile playing on your lips.
“Really?” If he had dog ears, they would have surely perked up. “Because I was lying, I definitely don’t just think that.”
“Woah, let’s calm down a little.”
He chuckles, breath misting your face.
His thumbs rub circles and you shiver at the faint sensation.
“Cold?”
You bite the lip and nod. Now that you’ve confessed, the forbidden desire building up in your core no longer feels like something you need to hide. Instead, you embrace it, and you let Gojo see the change in your eyes.
He nods back, looking down at his jersey on you.
“You should probably take this off or you’ll get sick.”
You grab the bottom of his shirt and pull it over your head, leaving you in just your bra. You mentally fist bump your past self for overthinking your attire earlier that morning and throwing on a matching set.
His pupils dilate as he looks at you, eyes lingering on the delicate lace.
“Am I moving too fast?” He whispers, breath misting your ear as he leans in.
You rapidly shake your head, heart pounding in your chest. The air between you crackles with tension, the rain pattering against the window like a distant drumbeat.
He sighs, a low, relieved sound that vibrates through his chest. “Good. C’mere.”
He backs you up against the door, the wood cool against your bare back. His hands slide up your sides as he traps you. The guise of getting you out of wet clothes feels like a thin excuse now, but you don’t mind, your own hands already tugging at his waistband, eager to feel more of him.
Gojo’s lips crash into yours, hungry and demanding, his tongue sweeping in to claim your mouth. You kiss back just as fiercely, fingers digging into his shoulders as you push against him, guiding him backward step by step. He stumbles slightly, surprised by your assertiveness, but a smirk tugs at his lips against yours.
He falls onto the couch with a soft thud, pulling you down on top of him. You straddle his lap, only because it’s the only position you’ve had experience with thus far, and the friction of his hardening cock against your core sends sparks through your body. Your mouths meet again in a heated makeout, tongues tangling, breaths mingling in short, desperate gasps.
His hands roam your back, unhooking your bra with practiced ease, letting it fall away. You arch into him, pressing your bare breasts against his chest, nipples hardening from the contact.
“Fuck, you’re so hot like this,” he growls, nipping at your lower lip. “Where were you hiding all of this, hm?”
You shiver, fingers digging into his shirt. “You like it when I tell you what to do, don’t you? Big bad frat boy, already so hard because a girl’s got you pinned.”
He groans, hands gripping your ass to grind you against him. “Keep talking like that, and I'll show you who’s really in control.”
But you don’t stop. Instead, you push him back further into the cushions and trail your lips down his jaw, his neck, biting lightly to mark him. He lets you, for now, his breath hitching.
His eyes look down your body, hands feeling the softness of your skin before resting at the waistband of your cute, little skirt. He smirks and before you know it, you’re torn from his neck because he flips you onto your back in one swift move, pinning your wrists above your head.
“My turn,” he purrs, voice rough.
You try to wriggle free. “What are you doing?”
“You've always had a thing against my tongue, haven’t you?”
“That was weeks ago, I don't—wait a minute!” Your hands find his head, trying to push him back up but he refuses, settling properly between your legs and lowering.
“Relax.” He turns his head and kisses your palm, eyes on yours. “I'll make you feel good. I always do, don't I?”
You hesitate, your arms losing their strength as the tension eases from your body. He watches you carefully, his gaze soft yet intense, making sure you’re okay before he moves. With a gentle nod from you, he lifts the edge of your skirt and flips it up onto your stomach, groaning low at the sight of the damp spot on your panties.
“So cute,” he hums, his free hand sliding between your legs to rub at the numb poking out through the fabric. “This little clit’s begging for attention.”
You let out a startled gasp, hips bucking up involuntarily at the sudden touch. It’s all still so new, the sparks of pleasure shooting through you like electricity.
“You want my mouth on this pretty pussy, don’t you?” He murmurs, lowering to mouth against your panties.
His warm breath seeps through the thin material, and the flat of his tongue presses against you, exploring with teasing pressure that’s not quite enough to satisfy the ache building inside.
You jolt again, the sensation overwhelming, back bowing slightly as if to instinctively pull away. He doesn’t let you go far, his hand on your thigh tightening to pull you back against his mouth.
“I know, I know,” he coos against you. “It's too much, isn’t it?”
You whimper, looking down and feeling a fresh surge of heat when you meet eyes with him.
“That’s it, just feel it,” he encourages, his thumb stroking your thigh in slow circles.
Finally, he draws your panties to the side and doesn’t waste another second.
Gojo’s mouth descends on your pussy, tongue flicking out to lap at your clit.
You gasp sharply, hips bucking up as he sucks the sensitive nub between his lips, rolling it gently. His hands hold your thighs apart, fingers digging into your skin to keep you open for him. He eats you out like he’s starved, tongue delving inside you, tasting your wetness then circling back to your clit with firm, insistent strokes.
“Oh god,” you choke out, the words tumbling from your lips in a breathless rush. “Fuck, it’s too—fuck it’s so good!”
With your hands free, you curl your fingers in his soft white hair, guiding him exactly where the pleasure feels strongest. It's your first time feeling anything like this, and the intensity builds fast, a coiling heat that’s overwhelming but addictive.
He hums against you, the vibrations making you whine as his tongue thrusts in and out, mimicking what’s to come, stretching you open with wet, probing motions.
“Mmm, taste so fucking sweet,” he growls between licks, pulling back just enough to speak, his breath hot against your folds. “You’re clenching so hard already—gonna finger fuck you open so you can take my cock later.”
He adds a finger, sliding it inside your slick heat slowly, curling it to brush against that spot that makes stars burst behind your eyelids. “That's it baby, feel how wet you are for me? so tight around my finger, imagine how you’ll squeeze my dick when I'm buried deep.”
You nod frantically, the haze of pleasure making it hard to form words.
He senses your building release, slipping a second finger inside to stretch you further, scissoring them gently to prepare you while his mouth latches back on your clit, sucking harder. “Come on, cum for me—wanna taste you so fucking bad, sweets. I want to feel you shake.”
The orgasm hits you like a wave, crashing over your body without warning. you cry out, back arching off the surface beneath you as your pussy clenches around his fingers, pulsing with release. He doesn’t stop, lapping at you through it, drawing out every shudder until you’re boneless and gasping for air, his tongue coaxing every last tremor from your oversensitive folds.
Gojo pulls back slowly, a string of saliva still connecting to you until he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction as he crawls up your body.
“Fuck, you taste like heaven,” he murmurs, leaning in for a deep kiss and letting you taste yourself on his lips.
You kiss back weakly making him chuckle, and he pulls back with a wet chu.
“You okay?”
You nod weakly. One moment you’re catching your breath on the couch, the next he’s lifting you over his shoulder and laying you down on his bed.
You yelp, feeling gravity turn on its head until you’re safely on his mattress.
Watching as he eagerly strips, you say, “You got a bedframe.”
He grins widely, shimmying down his boxers to join his sweatpants on the floor. “Yeah, I did. Do you like it?”
You huff. “Yeah. About time, Satoru.”
Gojo’s smile is oddly bright as he gets on the bed and hovers over you. He shifts, propping himself up on his elbows, his blue eyes darkening as they fixate on your chest. Without a word, he moves down, his mouth hovering just above your skin before he presses his face into the soft valley of your tits, inhaling deeply as if savouring your scent.
“God, I love these things.” he groans, voice muffled, his lips brushing the sensitive underside. “So goddamn perfect. Feel how hard you make me just staring at them?”
You squirm, indeed feeling his cock throb against your leg. “You’re such an animal.”
“I can't help it. Been thinking about these ever since last time.” He peeks up at you though he’s still hesitant to part with them completely. “Can i fuck them?”
Your nod is all the consent he craves. He straddles your waist carefully and guides his thick length to rest in the plush channel you’ve created by pressing your breasts together. The first slide is torturously slow, the velvety skin enveloping him as he rocks forward, the tip emerging shiny with precum near your collarbone.
“Shit, yes,” he hisses, hips snapping in a shallow rhythm. “So soft, so fucking warm around me. Look at that, sweets. Your tits are hugging my dick like they were made for it.”
His voice drops lower, rough with building pleasure, each word punctuated by the slick glide of skin on skin.
You watch him, mesmerised by the concentration etching his features, brow furrowed, lips parted as he pants. Sweat beads on his forehead and trickles down his temples as his abs flex with every controlled push. The friction builds between your tits, his precum smearing across your skin, making the slide even smoother and more obscene.
He glances down to watch his cock disappear and poke out from your cleavage. “Open your mouth for me, baby.”
“Sweets,” you remind him.
He lets out a stifled groan, hips jerking forward. “Sweets, please. Let me see your pretty tongue. Want it on my tip when i come through so fucking bad.”
The nickname sends a thrill through you, and you part your lips obediently, flattening your tongue in invitation. He groans at the sight, hips stuttering as he angles higher, the flushed head of his cock brushing your waiting mouth on the next thrust.
“Fuck, just like that,” he rasps. “Your tongue feels so good lapping at me like that. Swirl it around, taste how much I want you. God, sweets, you’re killing me.”
You do, tracing the sensitive underside when he pushes forward, the salty tang of him flooding your senses. His reaction is immediate, a deep, guttural moan escapes him, his rhythm faltering as he jerks deeper, chasing the wet heat of your mouth.
“Can't get enough,” he growls, drawing back only to thrust again, his tip kissing your tongue with deliberate precision and drawing back a sticky string of his precum and your saliva. “Gonna fuck your mouth next, stuff it full of my cock until you’re choking on it. You'd take it so well, wouldn’t you? Suck me down like the greedy little thing you are.”
Saliva pools on your tongue and drips down to mix with the mess on your chest. He watches it all with hooded eyes, rutting faster now, the slap of his hips against your breasts echoing softly in the room.
“Fuck, sweets—gonna cum,” he warns through gritted teeth, his forehead creasing in that pretty, desperate way. “Can’t hold back with you squeezing me like this. Shit, i’m gonna paint you, mark every inch of these pretty tits.”
He lurches forward suddenly, back bowing as he towers over you, one hand bracing beside your head while the other strokes his base to control his release. The first hot spurt lands across your neck, thick and warm, followed by another that arches toward your open mouth. He aims with a focused groan, pressing down on the head to guide it, ropes of cum landing on your tongue, filling your senses with his taste.
“Take it, that’s a good girl,” he pants, voice breaking on a final, shuddering thrust. “Look at you, covered in me. So fucking hot, dripping with my cum on your face and tits.”
His body quakes through the aftershocks, eyes never leaving yours, drinking in your reaction as he milks every drop onto you.
When he’s spent, he collapses forward slightly, catching himself on his forearms to avoid crushing you and leans down.
Your lips meet his in a deep, unhurried kiss, tongues tangling slow and sweet at first, then hungrier as you melt into it. The taste of him, salty from earlier, mixed with the faint tang of your own arousal, ignites you, and you tug him down, hands roaming his shoulders, feeling the flex of muscle under sweat damp skin. A soft moan escapes you, and he swallows it, his grip tightening just a fraction.
He pulls back and pants against your lips, half laughing.
“Sorry, I should have warned you. Kind of not the most virgin friendly thing to do, huh?” He sits up and reaches for some tissue to clean you. “Should of saved this for inside you, sweets.”
You clench, squeezing your thighs together. “I’ve never…”
His eyes soften, wiping the last of his cum. “I know, sweets. We can wait if you need to, there’s no rush.”
But curiousity and want is a dangerous cocktail and you find yourself shaking your head. “I want to.”
Gojo lets out a shuddering breath and nods, sliding off your chest, his cock glistening and heavy against his thigh. “Let me get you warmed up again.”
He doesn't find much difficulty with that because one hand against your slit and his eyebrows are rising, feeling your wetness despite the lack of attention.
You blush, feeling caught. “What? Don’t look at me like that, it’s embarrassing.”
“What’s got you so wet, hm?”
You squirm, feeling the lingering pleasure flare up. “It’s not my fault you’re so vocal.”
“Dirty girl. You like hearing how good you make me feel?” His thumb smears your entrance, picking up and spreading the fresh arousal that gathers there and it’s as good as any verbal answer. “Feel that? So worked up with nowhere to go.”
His fingers part you gently, circling your entrance with feather-light strokes that make you gasp.
“Let me warm you up again, sweets. You’re so swollen here, feels like you’ve been waiting for more. Gonna make sure you’re nice and ready for me.”
He plays with the mess between your legs, his own expression a mix of hunger and restraint, breaths coming in measured pulls as he fights the urge to rush. One finger dips inside you shallowly, then two, curling just right to brush that spot that sends sparks up your spine.
The stretch is easier now, your body remembering the pleasure, and he coos softly at your soft whimper, thumb finding your clit to rub in slow, firm circles.
“Shit, you’re so tight,” he groans quietly, voice rough around the edges. “So warm and wet, it’s killing me not to slide in right now. But we’re taking our time, yeah? Making this perfect for you.”
Your hips rock instinctively into his hand, the coil of heat tightening low in your belly, and he grins, leaning in to pepper kisses along your jaw.
“Look at you, getting into it. My sweet girl, so responsive.”
You whine, the pleasure having reached a plateau and when you buck up for more, he withdraws his hand. The loss makes you whine but he hushes you with a gentle kiss to your forehead, reaching over to the nightstand and searching through his messy drawers for a condom.
The foil crinkles under his fingers as he tears it open and positions himself at your entrance. You're still slick, he’s made sure of that, but the anticipation makes you clench, nerves building up. He notices your sharp inhale and lets his tip nudge your slick folds, parting them teasingly though he pauses there to let you feel the pressure without pushing in.
“Hey, eyes on me, sweets,” he murmurs, voice steady despite the way his chest heaves, his cock twitching against you. “You still okay? Tell me if it’s too much, I’ll stop, I promise. But fuck, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to be inside you.”
“I’m okay,” you whisper breathlessly, fingers curling into the sheets below. “Just… go slow?”
He notices and slides a hand down to interlace your fingers, bringing your hand up to his lips and placing a soft kiss to your palm. “Of course. Whatever you want.”
The stretch is immediate, a slow burn as he guides himself in, sinking bit by bit. His cock is much thicker than his fingers but the warmth of him, the way he watches every flicker of your expression with that twitch in his jaw, makes it bearable.
“Fuck, you’re so fucking tight,” he rasps, eyes shutting briefly. “Gripping me so good already. Easy, sweets, just relax into it.”
His voice cracks a little on the end, his fingers digging into your skin as he holds himself still once he’s halfway in.
It aches, but the fullness is intoxicating, waves of pleasure chasing the discomfort as your body yields. You gasp, squeezing his hand and he coos softly, stroking you with his thumb.
“Can I keep going?”
You nod and even before your next breath, he’s already sliding in and bottoming out with a shared gasp, hips flushed against yours. His forehead rests against yours, breaths mingling in the humid air.
"How's that feel? Too much?” He asks softly.
“Full… so full,” you whimper, rocking experimentally and he hisses through his teeth, hips bucking up just a fraction before he catches himself.
“Fuck, want me to move, sweets?” He shifts beneath you, guiding your hips in a gentle circle to grind against you, his praises making the movement slick.
“Please,” you gasp out as the fullness sparks pleasure deep inside and he rewards your honest words with a slow roll of his hips.
“Good girl,” he praises, voice dropping to a gravelly whisper as he starts to move, shallow thrusts that build a steady friction. Each slide in and out drags against your inner walls, drawing out filthy whimpers and sighs as he hits that sweet spot with precision born of his experience.
Soon, your toes are curling and your back bows off his mattress, desperate to meet his thrusts.
“Listen to those sounds you’re making,” he coos, emphasising his words with a deep thrust. “You’re taking me so well, sweets. Makes me want to stay buried in your forever.”
The pace gradually quickens, his control fraying at the edges as your moans encourage him. He shifts the angle, one leg hooking over his shoulder to deepen the penetration, and the new position has you crying out, pleasure coiling tight in your core.
Sweat beads on his skin, dropping onto your chest and he leans down to capture a nipple between his lips, sucking gently as he thrusts harder, the wet slap of skin echoing softly.
“That’s it, let go for me,” he urges against your tits, teeth grazing the peak before soothing it with his tongue. “I can feel you squeezing, you close for me already? Come on, sweets, chase it.”
His words weave through the haze, dirty and devoted, spurring you higher as his freehand slips between you to circle your clit in time with his hips. The dual sensations overwhelm, building to a peak that has you trembling beneath him.
When it hits, it’s blinding, your orgasm crashing over you in waves, walls clenching rhythmically around him and pulling him deeper. He groans your name like a prayer, thrusts stuttering as rides it out with you, prolonging the bliss with expert rolls of his hips.
Only when you slump, sweaty and panting, does he let himself follow, a filthy groan escaping his lips as he buries himself deep one last time and spills into the condom, body shuddering as he struggles to hover over you.
He doesn’t pull away immediately, instead pressing his hips closer to ensure you’ve gotten everything before collapsing half on top of you, peppering lazy kisses along your neck.
“You’re amazing,” he whispers. “My perfect girl, did so good for us.”
You whimper against the ticklish sensation. “You're too heavy.”
He chuckles and rolls off you, slowly pulling out to pull the condom off and discard it. you watch him with sleepy eyes, eagerly nuzzling into his arms when he settles back beside you.
“Need anything? Water? Cuddles?”
You hum, feeling the satisfaction morph into a drowsiness that has you melting into his arms, only feeling his warmth.
“You?”
He chuckles, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “I’m so glad I stole you away. You’re so fucking perfect for me.”
You lean into his side, feeling a sense of indescribable completeness that fills you with certainty.
Geto Suguru may have been everyone’s first love but Gojo Satoru is the one you choose.
And judging by the way his arm tightens around you, the way his grin softens when he looks down at you, he knows it too.
Geto Suguru is everyone’s first love.
Even to this day, your friends will roll their eyes and insist that can’t possibly be true. But from experience, that was exactly who he was, someone to admire from afar like a painting behind glass. Beautiful and alluring, and just out of reach.
You see him now up, sitting on the couches at the house party driving the murmur of conversation with ease, a red cup used to gesture. Laughter ripples outward in waves, people leaning closer, drawn in.
You smile out of solidarity, resting against the wall with content misplaced at a busy place like this.
“Did you wait long?”
You turn your head to find your boyfriend weaving through bodies with the casual confidence of someone who assumes space will make itself around him. Two drinks in hand, hair messy under his cat, grin already forming because he’s caught you staring.
You push off the wall, reaching automatically for whichever cup is closer but he pulls back to sniff both before handing you the opposite one.
You take it gratefully and when you take a sip, you realise it’s your favourite juice.
“Wait time longer than the lines at Universal,” you tease.
He grins, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Next time I'll get us the priority pass. Not that it looked like you minded the wait. Don’t think I didn't see you eyeing Suguru like that. Do I have competition again?”
You shove him playfully. “Please, like I'm the one who’s been draping themselves over him for the past hour.”
Across the room, Geto laughs again, someone hanging off his shoulder while he tries to keep the liquid in his cup from spilling. He catches your eye briefly and lifts his cup in greeting. You return it with a smile.
Next to you, Gojo sighs dramatically.
“Wow,” he says flatly. “Right in front of me too. Why can’t I see any remorse in your eyes?”
“Because there isn’t any there,” you snort. “You're the one who told him to come tonight.”
“Where there’s Satoru, there’s Suguru.”
“I learnt that the hard way.”
He hums, arm sliding around your waist to pull you flush against his side. His thumb starts tracing lazy circles just above your hip, absentminded and affectionate, a touch so familiar you barely notice as you lean into him in return.
“Still,” he murmurs, quieter now, his breath warm against your cheek. “You don’t have to keep looking at him like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like you’re thinking about what you could have had.”
You tilt your head to look up at him. His expression isn’t jealous, not completely, just searching, softer than the bravado he usually wears.
“I'm not,” you promise gently. “It was always superficial. You know that better than anyone. I guess now, looking at him is like looking at a relic of a different version of me.”
He hums. “He would have liked that sentence.”
You roll your eyes, ever so familiar with his dramatics. “You have nothing to worry about, baby. I promise.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” You reach up and adjust the brim of his cap slightly, smoothing down a piece of hair that refuses to stay put. “Besides, I think I traded up.”
“Keep talking like that and I'm going to start thinking you actually like me,” he grins, voice lowering.
You smack his chest but your other hand lingers in his hair, fingers slipping into the soft hair at his nape. "Don't get cocky.”
Too late. He's already smiling wide, not the loud, flashy grin everyone else gets, but something softer and almost boyish reserved just for you.
Gojo leans down and finds your lips. The kiss is slow and unhurried, deeper than something meant for a crowded room but not quite indecent, like he’s forgotten where you are or just doesn’t care.
He pulls back just enough to talk. “Hey, I have an idea that’ll solve this three way jealousy.”
“What?"
“Why don’t we just have a threesome?”
a/n: i had to repost this because i realised i could fit everything into one post but holy hell reformating everything made me wanna die so please smash that like button hit subscribe and don't forget to turn on that notification bell ++ shoutout to flatline and happy pokemon day to those who celebrate
this was sooooo good it’s so nice seeing satoru being portrayed as diff than stereotypical frat boys and actually just being misunderstood and omf all the scenes were so well written by far my fav fic ever
geto suguru is everyone’s first love except mine. mine was gojo satoru 🥹
synopsis: packed and ready to go for your best friend’s destination wedding in italy? check. hot, broody senior manager jeon jeongguk as the groom’s best man? nothing could’ve prepared you for that. alternatively, what happens in italy, stays in italy … right?
pairing: sr. manager!jeongguk x fem colleague!reader
wc: 15.6k
genre: forbidden love, coworkers au, smut, angst
cw: slice of life, age gap (jk 37, oc 22), cold jk (#TroubledMen), hopeless romantic oc, grief, negative family dynamics, side character death, corporate lingo, light fluff, rich privilege, yearning, one sided grudge, oc gets harassed, hurt with some comfort, 18+ ONLY, porn with lots of plot, sexual tension, fingering, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, slight overstimulation, multiple orgasms, riding, missionary
a/n: pls go wish my queen n goat of dilf jk @lovieku the happiest bday! this was written as a gift to her <3 SHE DESERVES THE WORLD AND SO MUCH MORE
Auntie Lin’s only piece of advice after you announced your acceptance of your first corporate job: Small talk is your best friend. The advice hadn’t registered in your mind until you facilitated a meeting with executive management where the first five minutes of silent judgement nearly made you quit the job until you asked, “Any weekend plans?”
You learned the power of small talk and how obsessed executive leaders were when it came to bragging about their personal lives outside the office. The advice worked so well, management gave you an unprompted promotion two weeks later.
Nothing wrong with being the personality hire if it helps you climb the corporate ladder.
Okay, well, no, you had history with this company.
Your father’s connection with the talent acquisition management landed you an internship at this very company right out of high school, so you didn’t need to reestablish your rapport after graduating from university.
You’re still a hard worker. Yes … objectively speaking, nepotism played a part in your current successes — you don’t shy away from that fact.
Your charming and curious personality only got you so far, but the magic always stopped with one person.
Jeon Jeongguk.
Hard case to crack and even harder to not stare at when he’s within your vicinity.
He’s polished, well-spoken, and … let’s just say there are things you shouldn’t say or think about in a place of work, let alone towards someone in the senior management team. He hardly smiles and if he does, it’s never towards you.
Right now? You think the least Jeongguk could do is crack a smile at your joke to break the tension in the virtual meeting. No one liked hearing bad news and you became the bearer of bad news as you explained to the client why a deliverable will not be made by the proposed timeline.
Delivering bad news was a manager’s job and unfortunately, your manager entrusted you with this responsibility right before she left for maternity leave, raving about how it’ll build your leadership and communication skills … right, right.
Jeongguk was the other leader overseeing the project. His team met all the deliverables, so there was no real need for his attendance other than pure formalities.
This was your chance to show him what you were capable of.
“Mr. Choi, we apologize for not making the deadline. With half the team on leave, the estimated completion date will need to be extended as a result.” You explain.
Jeongguk sits and watches you exchange words with the client. The mic button remained on mute during the many moments you would’ve benefited from his direction or support. You didn’t think you’d have to go through a humiliation ritual the day before your big trip for your best friend’s wedding in Italy. It’s your turn to have your mic button on mute as you let the client chew you out in front of your peers.
“Mr. Choi.” Jeongguk interrupts.
Thank god, finally.
“The deliverables will be completed by the original proposed due date. I will personally see through that.”
You exhale in relief once the client settles back into their chair, demeanor shifting from their outburst moments ago.
You [3:32 p.m.]: Thank you, Jeongguk.
As expected, he doesn’t reply.
The meeting wraps up on a positive note thanks to Jeongguk’s interception. Everyone bids each other farewell until you hear a call of your name.
“Stay on the call. Need to discuss a few things with you.”
Confused, you aren’t sure why he doesn’t ask you to walk ten steps to his office to chat privately. You swallow and one by one, all of your colleagues leave the meeting until it’s just you and him.
He sighs, letting his agitation come out freely now. He loosens his tie and fixes his frames on his nose.
“So …” you begin.
“Do you know what your first mistake was on that call?” He sneers, a complete one-eighty from the well-mannered speaker he was during the meeting.
“I’m–uh, not sure.” You reply honestly.
“‘We apologize,’” he repeats your words, “there is no ‘we’ in this — you were the one that didn’t meet the service level agreement. Learn to take accountability for your own shortcomings.”
Ouch.
He continues, “You also failed to offer any alternatives or incentive for the delay. This is about being reputable — customer experience dictates future collaborations with new clients. If this one goes sour, we lose our clientele.”
Each word morphed into daggers piercing and digging into your self-esteem.
The finishing blow?
“That being said, you will finish what we originally promised the client.”
“But,” your heart drops at the mention of working during your time off, “I’m not going to be in the country.”
“I’m sure there’s internet wherever you’re going.”
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
“And then! He said I’m paid salary, not hourly, so it doesn’t matter how long I need to work — I just need to get it done.” You complain to your colleague, Mina, who happened to work under Jeongguk’s section.
“Oof, sorry girl.” She pours the coffee into her cup, unsurprised by her boss’ expectations. Setting the pot back onto the warmer, she leans against the counter. It’s just the two of you in the breakroom, free from prying eyes and ears. “So what are you gonna do?”
You groan. As much as you’d like to ramble and moan about how unreasonable Jeongguk’s demands were, you knew he was right about needing to take accountability.
“Well, if I push in some work in the early morning and night the first couple of days in Italy, I should be able to get it done.” You sigh. “Just hate it.”
Mina pats your shoulder and gives you a reassuring smile, which soon changes into a bewildered expression as she digs her fingers into your shoulder.
“Oh, hey bossman, here for a coffee refill?” Mina’s voice strains, projected to the space behind you.
You turn and there stands Jeon Jeongguk in all his glory. While you had the privilege to see him earlier today during the virtual meeting, nothing compared to the real deal. Dressed in an all-black suit, Jeongguk looks ever immaculate. His face is free from his metal-framed glasses, but they leave their small indentations on the sides of his nose. The deadliest combo came in the form of his hair pushed back, exposing his wrinkle-free forehead.
If it weren’t for his wired earphones and outdated iPod you caught him with during his walk, you would’ve never guessed his age. Technically, you still don’t know the exact number but Anna in Human Resources hinted he’s in his mid to late thirties.
Whatever. Age is just a number and hasn’t stopped you from trying to befriend the older man.
“Yes, my third one today.” He muses.
“Anything the team and I can do to help wrap up things for you before your vacation?” Mina probes.
Wait. You never caught wind of that.
“No,” he shakes his head, “thank you, though.”
Your heart stirs at the low timbre of his chuckle, surprised at his abilities in displaying any other emotions outside his stoic expression. You theorize it comes easier with an established rapport.
Maybe you’ll try your luck today.
“How long are you going to be out for?” You ask, moving to the side so he has better access to the coffee pot. His scent naturally fills your space — a mixture of fresh laundry and cedarwood.
“Two weeks.”
“Oh, same here!” You beam.
“Yes, you’ve mentioned that quite a bit this month.”
You warm in embarrassment; though, the feelings get swept underneath the rug at another fact.
He listened — more importantly, he remembered your many musings.
“I’m going to Italy.” You remark, hoping he’d give a little more detail on his own vacation if you shared a bit about your upcoming adventures.
Jeongguk freezes momentarily and clears his throat before setting down the nearly empty pot.
“That’s nice.”
Seizing the moment to continue the conversation, you throw out details of your trip, namely for the wedding you’ll attend as maid of honor for your best friend.
“And they’re going to have this lovely venue near the beach. It’s going to be great.” You marvel.
“Ugh, I’m jealous,” Mina pouts. “Are you going to be doing something fun during your time off, Jeongguk?”
You watch him with expectant eyes.
“Tending some family matters.”
That’s corporate lingo for: it’s personal, so none of your business. Everyone knows to back off on the topic at that point.
Taking a sip of his coffee after mixing a pack of Splenda, he offers a tight-lipped smile, “I have to head back to the desk. Enjoy your break.”
Alone with Mina once again, you look at her with defeated eyes.
“He’s just introverted and private, babe. I wouldn’t sweat it.” She waves.
“I’ve been here for over a year and he’s never like this to management or clients.” You sigh. “Maybe I’m the problem.”
It’s hard to not take things to heart being a natural born people pleaser. You want to be liked and if you’re not, at least know why; except, Jeongguk kept things strictly work related with all the little pocket of interactions you’ve had with him.
If you were brave enough, you’d ask him about it over coffee or lunch — anywhere that might give you a glimpse of who he is outside of work.
“Don’t mind him. In about twenty-four hours, you’ll be in Italy! Last time you updated, the best man was a little wishy-washy about the wedding? How’s that going?”
“Jihyo said Seojun got it sorted out, so they’re okay.” All you know from the matter is how much of a struggle it was to get a definite answer from his best man. Prick move and unnecessary stress for the wedding party. Had you been in Seojun’s position, you would’ve cut losses and moved forward without the best man early on.
Planning a wedding was difficult enough, let alone dealing with difficult people in the wedding party. You pray he steps into his role as the best man to lessen the to-be-wedded couple’s worries.
“Good. Wedding drama’s the worst.” Mina nods. “Still haven’t recovered from finding out my cousin’s husband was fucking his cousin.”
The gossip session goes for another fifteen minutes until you begrudgingly head back to finish up some last minute tasks. You weren’t going to be that coworker who leaves a bunch of unfinished work for your backup.
Another thing you didn’t want to be was like your father, but you’re no different by the time you finish your pending tasks at 9:52 p.m. You do a quick once-over your automatic out-of-office notice and send out a list of items for your backup to look after before stuffing all your belongings into your workbag.
Going home was always your favorite time of the day, granting you the chance to walk past Jeongguk’s office. Even from where you’re standing, the lights in his office are the only ones still on out of all the managers on the floor.
His door remains slightly ajar throughout the day aside from the times he’s on a call or speaking to one of his employees. An ‘open door policy,’ Mina explained. Wants the folks on his team comfortable coming to him with their needs or questions.
You didn’t need anything, per se. There were plenty of questions floating in your head, but none that would qualify as work-related or professional. Things like … where are you going for vacation? Would you like to grab dinner together? … Are you seeing anyone?
Your short almond shaped nails tap on his metal name plaque outside his office.
He looks up from his computer, the monitor’s brightness setting doing little to hide his exhausted stare. One brow raised, he cocks his head to the side.
“Come in.”
You take in your surroundings: a shelf containing all his Employee of the Year awards, empty “In” bin as opposed to a stacked “Out” bin, and half-finished cup of coffee. Above all, no pictures of his family or signs of life outside of work.
A stark contrast in comparison to your cubicle full of small trinkets, pictures of your loved ones, and cards you’ve received from both your coworkers and clients.
“Just wanted to say goodnight and thank you again for joining the meeting.” You say. “I followed up with the client with your recommendations and they’re happy with the timeline.”
He nods. “I’m glad it worked out.”
“Well,” You rock on your heels, not wanting to leave just yet, “I’ll see you in two weeks. Hope you have a nice time off, Jeongguk.”
He leans back into his deskchair, glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose as he studies your face. His black dress shirt stretches and expands tightly at a passing thought; at the last second, he makes his resolve in foregoing the notion for simpler words.
“Likewise. Safe travels to Italy.”
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
Despite the two layovers and many near-death turbulences later, you arrive in Venice, Italy in one piece. Your best friend, Jihyo, was the first person you see at the gates, smile lighting up the building when she finally spots you through the crowds. These days, she glows more with her soon-to-be husband, Seojun.
You’ve met him only a handful of times and he’s always been kind. You don’t know him well enough, but as long as your friend was happy, so were you.
Which is why she’s going all out for her wedding — it’s her chance to do what she wants with those who care for her. Jihyo’s parents unfortunately did not extend their support and care. They were so against the idea of her marrying a person of no status, her father threatened to cut off all ties and funds if she were to go through with marrying Seojun.
“My favorite person is finally here!” She squeezes you in her arms. “How was the flight? Are you hungry? We can go get a quick bite.”
“Jihyo, love, slow down,” Seojun comes from behind and offers you a kind greeting. “You must be exhausted. We can head back to the hotel. Just waiting for my uncle to clear customs.”
“Oh! Do you know when he’ll land?” You ask.
“I think he was on the same flight as you, so he should be out soon.” He pulls out his phone to answer a quick text before scanning the area.
“Think that’s him.” He squints. “Uncle, over here!” He extends his arm above his head.
You expected a fifty year old balding man, not senior manager, Jeon Jeongguk.
Fuck.
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
You didn’t think you’d ever ride in the same car as one of your managers, especially one you had a dire crush on. You definitely didn’t think you’d be seated in the back of a rental car with him in Italy for your best friend’s wedding.
This whole scenario has to be straight out a romcom … or, in your case, a horror film.
You open up the notes app in your phone and type out a quick message: Do we tell them we know each other?
What you really wanted to ask was: Why the hell didn’t you say anything about this being the “family matter” you had to take care of?
He takes your phone from your hand and begins typing something before handing it back to you. Nothing from your original note was edited, but a second later a notification comes through.
Jeongguk [4:56 p.m.]: No. Too complicated.
You [4:56 p.m.]: Okay..
“Uncle.” Seojun looks at the rear mirror. “How’s work been?”
“Busy,” he sighs. “But it’s been getting better.”
“I’m glad. Hope these two weeks will give you the break you need. You didn’t bring your work laptop, right?” He presses.
Kind of cute seeing the younger male lecture his uncle — cuter seeing Jeongguk grumble at his nephew’s nagging.
“No promises.”
“Speaking of work,” Jihyo chimes in, “How you coping with work?” She turns her entire body from the passenger seat to look at you.
The passengers in the car go silent for your reply, feeling Jeongguk’s shift from the work status inquiry.
“Fine.” You answer quickly.
“Really? That one manager didn’t give you more shit right–”
“Jihyo!” You interrupt, quickly covering up with an awkward laugh and stiff smile, “ Ha-ha … no, it’s been great!”
“Wha–? But you were venting about having to work during the trip … Honestly, that manager’s lucky he’s hot.”
“Ji–”
“Hot?” Jeongguk asks with a raised brow. There’s a lift in his voice, forcing you to bury and shrink deeper into your seat.
“Allegedly.” Jihyo replies mindlessly. Oblivious to your discomfort of the topic, Jihyo continues, “You still gotta sneak a picture of him when you can, babe. I need to see if his pretty privileges warrant this sort of power trip.”
You’ve heard summers in Italy were magical. You wish for some of that magic to touch you right now — the kind good enough to make you disappear all together from this awkward conversation.
“Huh.” Jeongguk props his elbow by the car’s window ledge, palm covering his mouth. “I’m curious too.”
Jihyo changes the topic to the itinerary she made for the wedding party; however, you couldn’t be bothered to tune into the details. Knowing Jihyo, she’ll eventually send the party a spreadsheet of the schedule.
You [5:02 p.m.]: Please ignore Jihyo 🥹
Your heart accelerates at the appearance of the infamous dots signaling Jeongguk’s reply in the making.
Jeongguk [5:03 p.m.]: I’ll try. Power trips make it insanely hard to.
You chew on your bottom lip out of habit, feeling the sweat gather behind your neck. Hand fanning your face, you glance over and notice a slight shake in Jeongguk’s stature. He’s still facing away from you and towards the window, but from the reflection, you can see the corners of his mouth lift.
Endorphins rush through your bloodstream at the thought of making him happy.
While chasing your happiness has always been your life motto, you wouldn’t mind chasing for Jeongguk’s happiness too.
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
On Jihyo’s itinerary, she deliberately left Venice off from the rest of the wedding party arriving later at the actual wedding site. The next two days were solely meant to spend more time with the maid of honor and best man.
The first day in Venice naturally got cut short with your arrival time; so, the only thing Jihyo planned was a nice dinner after you and Jeongguk settled into your respective rooms. Dinner rolls by with just you, Jihyo, and Seojun perusing the menu for the umpteenth time. The seat, meant for Jeongguk, remains cold and empty. After about thirty minutes and a couple text messages, Seojun confirms with the waiter to remove the utensils and plate — something about his uncle not feeling well.
“Okay, but he’ll be at dinner tomorrow, right?” Jihyo frowns, eyes full of worry.
“Yes, love.” He smiles. “Just old man tendencies and jetlag got the best of him. He’ll be there tomorrow.”
Back at the hotel, you had half a mind to check in on him and just as you built up the courage to knock, the door swings open to reveal a Jeongguk you’ve yet to ever witness: dark grey compression shirt with five-inch inseam shorts. He has his wired earphones in and looks well rested, contrary to what Seojun mentioned at dinner about two hours ago.
“Oh, are you feeling better?” You ask, hand retracted and tucked behind your back.
His brows twitch, fingers removing one of the buds out his ear. “Sorry?”
“Seojun mentioned you weren’t feeling well. Are you better now?”
“Yep.” He answers.
Awkward.
“Where you headed to? It’s late.” You rock on your heels, afraid you might’ve overstepped with your light interrogation.
“Saw a small running trail nearby, just wanna get some movement in.”
“Would you like—”
“Well, goodnight.” He places the earpiece back in and walks off, the scent of his fresh linen deodorant trails along with him.
“—company?” The end of your sentence comes out in a tiny whisper, the question dying on the tip of your tongue as his figure disappears in the distance.
It was going to be a long two weeks, but you’re optimistic for a chance to change the tides with Jeongguk. Maybe even get to know him a little better or collect more versions of who he may be outside of work before this trip ends.
Arms linked with Jihyo, you walk down the small alleyways of Venice the next day, marveling at the tiny trinkets on display. Seojun and Jeongguk were always a couple steps behind, mainly taking note of the repeating gelato flavors at each stand. Your ears perk when Jeongguk chuckles at Seojun’s excitement of finally finding a stall with a new flavor. His laugh rings deep and rich, something you’re rarely afforded at the workplace.
You hold up two carnival masks to your face. “Which one suits me better?” You preferred the pink one in your left hand, but the green in your right hand spoke to you as well.
“Mm, you know I’ll always favor pink, but is there room in your suitcase?” Jihyo inquires.
Well, no, but you could always buy another suitcase.
“All going to end up as clutter once you’re home.” Jeongguk mutters to himself, eyeing the other trinkets on the shelf.
Whether or not it was directed at you, you put the mask back with the rest. The shop owner smiles, a little dejected at the missed sale, but with the numerous tourists filtering through the alley, he’s bound to make his daily quota by closing time.
The rest of the day is spent on trying new food — your favorite being the bruschetta flight near the waters. Again, Jeongguk and Seojun were always a couple steps behind, chatting about god knows what while you and Jihyo swap gelatos between every two or so licks. Venice was packed — mainly with tourists, but in a specific alleyway you all decided to turn into held a different kind of danger.
Pigeons. Lots of them.
One could argue Venice might be the motherland to birds; you’re not in any position to disagree as you cower between the birds staring down at your group from the railings. They swarm around your feet, begging for whatever you’d offer or accidentally drop.
Lucky for you, a shop owner comes and throws out bits of their baguettes. All the pigeons flock over in pursuit of their (probable) tenth snack for the day. You breathe a sigh of relief for the small deterrence, walking quicker to escape from the flock.
“Phew, thought we were goners back there.” Jihyo jokes, looking back at the boys.
At the last second, a seagull swoops in and takes the unfinished gelato right from your hand. You let out a blood curdling scream, hand immediately letting go of the cone. You grab Jihyo by the shoulder and chant for the birds to take her as an offering instead.
Everyone within the vicinity laughed, some tourists offered a sympathetic smile and asked if you were okay. Among the laughter, Jeongguk’s chuckle echoes loudest in your head. It had never been your goal to become the group’s court jester, but you wouldn’t mind making it your life’s sole purpose for this version of him.
Seojun checks his watch. “Jihyo, baby, we still have five more hours to kill before our flight over to Sicily. Should we head back to the hotel? Uncle said he’s tired—”
Smile wiped off his handsome face, Jeongguk nudges the young man in the arm. “Don’t use me as a scapegoat.”
You never realized how much the two men resembled each other, catching you off guard when Jeongguk hooks his arm around Seojun’s neck, and rubs his knuckles over his nephew’s head. Their laughter comes out the same, pairing well with their toothy grins.
“We only have one last item on the itinerary.” Jihyo says, a fond smile at the sight of her happy fiance. “I wanted to do a little gondola ride.”
Most tourists seized the golden hour for their boat ride too, which sent you and your group on a hunt for an unoccupied gondola, eventually finding two docked boats on the opposite entrance of Venice.
“I’ll pass.” Jeongguk says with a hand up.
Jihyo pouts, pointing in your direction. “But she’d be all alone.”
“Oh, um, I don’t mind staying behind.” You smile, doing your best to not sound disappointed at the lost experience. “Can always ride a boat at home.”
“But Miss, when will you ride a gondola in Venice while the sun is setting?” One of the gondoliers pitches.
“He’s right.” Jihyo nods. “Please, Jeongguk?”
He’d rather not waste money on a tourist trap … one look at Jihyo’s pleading eyes in combination with his nephew’s displeased stare has him folding on the spot.
Defeated, he sighs, “Fine.”
Jihyo cheers, skipping over to the first boat lined up where Seojun waits patiently with a hand out for her.
Their boat rows off first and five minutes later, it was yours and Jeongguk’s turn to step into the gondola. He holds out his hand to steady your step, boat wobbling as you plant your first foot down. His hold lingers a little longer even when you’ve successfully made it into the boat. Eyes peering up at Jeongguk’s tall stature, your body heats up under his watchful gaze.
“Steady now?”
“Yes.” You chirp.
“Good.” He lowers you both carefully onto the small seats. Once secured, the gondolier begins his descent through the canals.
Naturally, you strike up a conversation with the gondolier, asking how many rides he averages a day to which he politely answers, ‘too many to count.’ The conversation goes on for another five minutes until Jeongguk sighs, a subtle signal for you to stop and take in your surroundings instead.
Despite the on and off whiffs of the decade old sewage lines rooted in the city, the ride descends to the narrower alleyways one would miss on foot. Water levels rising, the gondolier signals you both to duck at an approaching bridge. You hadn’t realized you didn’t duck low enough until you feel Jeongguk’s warm palm at the base of your head, urging you lower.
His hand rests there until it’s time for you both to lift your heads up again. So warm and thoughtful, unlike how he’s been treating you at work.
You might explode at the silence, finding the need to address the elephant in the room. What were the odds you’d be alone with Jeongguk again? What are the odds you’d be riding on a gondola in Venice, Italy with Jeongguk?
“Do you hate me?” You blurt out, immediately embarrassed at your sudden forwardness. The gondolier peers from the side and looks forward again, slowing his rowing motion with his oar.
Jeongguk’s brows furrow, lips pressed into a thin line. “I don’t hate you.”
“It seems like you do. You always are just so …”
“So …?” He trails along.
“Mean.” You frown. Feeling more foolish for your lack of proper vocabulary words for such a serious confrontation, you do your best to explain. “You seem to get along with everyone else at work and even here. You’re nice to everyone but me.”
He stares straight ahead, tongue probing against his cheek. He doesn’t respond right away and you deflate at your wasted effort in an attempt to understand Jeongguk beyond the cubicle. You only hear the waters splashing against the gondola as the oar steers you both to another quieter route.
If Jeongguk didn’t hate you before, he probably does right now. So evident in his silence and unwillingness to discuss this topic, you wonder to yourself … were older generations this bad with expressing their emotions and thoughts? Your father was a great example, and while you don’t want to generalize an entire generation, Jeongguk drives a hard bargain.
“How’d you get into Cientra Corporations?” The question rolls out of Jeongguk with no hint of curiosity.
What did your place of work have anything to do with his alleged animosity?
“I applied for an opening.” You answer.
His chuckles, full of mock and taunt. “When?”
You frown, a little taken aback by the conversation now turned into an interrogation.
“I think a month before my graduation?” Your stomach churns from the unpredictability of his next words.
“Right, of course.” Jeongguk looks to the side, eyes tracing the water stains on the old brick buildings.
“I’ve had plenty of internships during undergrad and I graduated early with honors.” His demeanor only makes you overexplain your qualifications. “My recruitment was done through a fair hiring process.”
“The position was not in the budget.” He rolls his eyes, his crossed arms accentuates his muscular build. If you were more shameless, you’d let your eyes linger at his chest for a little longer despite how his next words batters your pride. “Freshly graduated with little to no experience landing a mid-entry position?”
You’re not ashamed to admit you had a foot in thanks to your connections. Of course, you were unaware a position had been created just for you, but to insinuate you didn’t deserve your place … now, that was not something you’d take lightly.
“I’ve worked hard with all the opportunities—”
“As one should.” He interrupts. “But all your ‘opportunities’ only became yours because they were taken away from someone else. There were at least ten other highly qualified applicants in the candidate pool.”
You open your mouth, but Jeongguk beats you to it, “One summer internship at Cientra wouldn’t have gotten anyone else into the company.”
Now that shatters you. You had really thought you stood out in the pool considering you had previously applied and interned for the same company. Now you’re rethinking whether you’ve also gotten the job purely from connections.
Fighting through your imposter syndrome, you stand your ground. “At the end of the day, I was chosen and I take my job seriously. I can’t change what’s already set in stone.”
“That’s your privilege speaking.” He leans against the backrest. “I’ll only repeat this once: I don’t hate you.” Extremely hard to believe after your self esteem’s been kicked to the curb.
And despite the sour mood, you still try to salvage what you can. “Okay,” You breathe, “Regardless of how you feel about me, can we get along for the sake of the wedding?”
“Of course.” He rolls his shoulders, discomfort clear from the small chair setup. “Trying to make this wedding as seamless and pain-free as possible.”
You piece his aversion to the wedding now. The last minute confirmation of his attendance and lack of enthusiasm for the trip’s activities … it all checks. The gondolier rounds to the ride’s starting point and docks the boat where you and Jeongguk need to quickly alter your attitude in front of the unsuspecting couple.
Jeongguk stays behind to tip the gondolier, murmuring his apologies for the tense ride. From a distance, you overhear the gondolier snort, saying something on the lines of how he should be tipping Jeongguk for the soap opera level conversation.
Your act works — neither Jihyo nor Seojun suspected any shift in moods because Jihyo was too busy begging for another cannoli and, of course, Seojun being the exceptional fiance he is, advised you guys to return to the hotel first to prepare for the flight while he ran to the specific stall Jihyo requested for.
“Uncle, you go on ahead with the girls.”
Jeongguk shakes his head. “I’ll come with you.”
On the train ride back to the hotel, Jihyo lays her head on your shoulder. “I think Uncle Jeongguk hates me.”
That makes the two of you.
She continues, “I know this wedding was rushed, but I thought he’d warm up to the idea of us by now.”
Very out of character for Jihyo to sulk over the minute things in life. You’re not one to talk, knowing firsthand what it’s like to wish for someone’s approval.
“Hey … it’s been less than two days. And who cares what he thinks? You and Seojun are in this for life.”
“I know, I know. Seojun just adores his uncle, you know? That’s his only family.” Jihyo frowns. Unlike him, she’s grown up in a big and affluent family her entire life — well, now cut in half since her choice to marry Seojun, a man of no title or status. She can bear the disdain from her own family, but she doesn’t want Seojun to lose his one and only family member over their choices.
“I was thinking,” Jihyo begins, suddenly sitting upright with determined eyes. “You know, you’re always so fun and great with people … could you maybe get to know Uncle Jeongguk and put in a good word for me? Just until the time of the wedding at least.”
You’ve never seen her this desperate. You ponder back to the conversation on the gondola and if there were little to no chance of making things right with Jeongguk yourself, how were you going to do it for Jihyo?
You’re no better than Seojun and eventually give into her plea.
“Okay.” You smile, arms embracing her.
All checked out of the Venice hotel, your party makes it through the airport’s security checkpoint just in time for the flight to the actual wedding destination: Sicily.
Italy is magical and Sicily proved every part of that belief even in the cab ride over to the rental property. Windows down, you let the warm breeze run through your locks, uncaring if the sea salted air clung onto your hair and skin. The tips of your hair unknowingly float over and graze Jeongguk’s arms, marking and reminding him of your presence whether or not he welcomed it.
Jihyo really went all out and booked the dreamiest villa. The villa had everything: a fifteen minute walk to the wedding venue, close to local shops and restaurants, and here’s your favorite: the beach. It’s perfect … almost as perfect as the living situation Jihyo had planned out. No brainer, she and Seojun would get the main house while you and Jeongguk would occupy the cottage a couple steps away.
“Dinner in fifteen minutes? I have a reservation with the restaurant down the street.” Jihyo shrugs her duffle bag higher on her shoulders to which Seojun immediately takes after he unloaded all the other suitcases from the trunk.
“Isn’t it a little late for dinner?” Jeongguk reads his watch.
“Customary to eat later in Italy.” Jihyo smiles.
Jeongguk checked off all the body cues to decline. His resolve crumbles yet again from another one of Seojun’s stares, ultimately agreeing to dinner after settling in.
The first thing you and Jeongguk noticed upon entering the cottage was the stuffy and warm air from the windows being closed for too long. No matter how hard you push and yank the panes, the windows just wouldn’t budge. With a sigh, a strong source of heat presses against your backside.
The scent of fresh linen only welcomes you after laundry day and whenever you’ve switched out your bedsheets. Your mind wanders around scenarios of being welcomed by this exact scent and warmth in bed, sheets needing to be constantly changed afterwards.
Fuck.
Jeongguk’s fingers pull at the knobs above the window sill. Using way less force and energy, the window cracks open with ease and the crisp crash of waves in the distance meets your ears. Nothing was louder than the beating in your chest — must’ve been your imagination when you thought Jeongguk stayed a beat longer behind, breath sucked in from the proximity.
You replay the scenario in your head even at the dinner table.
The times you’ve looked up from your plate, you’ve unconsciously caught Jeongguk staring in your direction too. He looks away, suddenly mesmerized by the shoreline. His attention pulls at some clapping in the background, waiters and waitresses nearing your section of the restaurant. Your smile widens as they circle your table, confused but pleased by the grand gesture.
Setting a small cake down on the table and resuming their singing, you peer over at the frosted words: Happy 37th Birthday, Jeongguk!
Jeongguk keeps his smile at a sensible level, not wanting to show too much excitement.
After the employees leave, Seojun beams, “Jihyo arranged this. Nice, huh?” He has his arm around her shoulder.
“Yes, very. Thank you, Jihyo.” Jeongguk smiles, warm and sincere.
Bellies full, you all walk back to the property. Everything seems to fall into its natural place. Jeongguk lets you shower first and because you’re self conscious of taking too much time, you cut your usual routine by half. You’re seated at the same window sill again, watching the shoreline.
The lights in the room turn on and you startle. Looking back, you catch a half naked Jeongguk drying his wet hair with a small towel. Bare torso on full display, you gulp at the sight while unknowingly clenching your thighs together.
Thirty-seven looked good on Jeongguk.
You hope you looked this good at that age, but you have a long way to go. At twenty-two, you know your two little tattoos, one on your lower back and the other on your forearm, will look completely different in fifteen years. They’re nothing like Jeongguk’s, especially with all the intricate tattoos going up his arm, stopping at his chest — both old and new ones. In the office, you’ve only seen a snippet of his tattoos on his forearm, now you’ve been granted full access. Which you’re reminded that everything that happens in Italy will have to stay here. Water break chatter with Mina will exclude these details, saving these memories just for yourself on lonelier nights.
Jeongguk sucks in a breath, surprised at the sight of you. Should be in bed and knocked out from today’s festivities, but you’re there in your silk pajamas, shorts riding dangerously high in your seated position with your knees hiked up to your chest. His jaw clenches, fixing himself a glass of water at the kitchen sink. Hips pressed against the sink counter, he drinks the water, letting a couple droplets dribble past his chin and sharp jawline.
Summers in Italy were magical, but were they usually this hot?
You edge closer to the window sill, praying for the night breeze to snap you out of whatever spell you caught at this hour.
“Jetlagged?” He asks, rinsing the cup. You blink at his question, a little confused at his initiation. It warms you, but you know better than to latch onto this small exchange.
“A little.” You let out a disgruntled sound as you get up. You think you must’ve hallucinated Jeongguk’s frustrated exhale at your change of position. “You?”
“Mhm. Not as bad as the first night. The run helped.” He replies.
You have all the reason not to get along with him, let alone strike a normal conversation; though, you bare your warmest and genuine smile, “That’s nice. I’m glad.”
“Yes. Well. Goodnight.” He clears his throat.
The lock on your door clicks first, back pushed against the door for some grounding and support. Your bones click against the hard surface, ears cluing in for any sounds from your temporary roommate on the other threshold. His door shuts too, followed by a deep sigh.
There’s some shuffling followed by a drop of what you assumed were clothing. Hot and consumed by your thoughts, your mind spirals at the image of him in nothing but his briefs.
God, this was going to be a long trip.
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
The internet connection in this villa was probably the worst thing Jeongguk has ever encountered in his life — even worse than the time he went abroad for school during his prime. It was another neighboring country, but still … how hard was it to get an adequate signal?
He’s tried everything. Sitting in odd places, being closer to the router — nothing’s worked.
He looks out the same window you were seated at last night, hoping to find an answer before he hurls his laptop out.
Until he sees you.
You’re seated outside near a lemon tree between the two accommodations, laptop perched on the patio table while you tug at one of the nearby branches for a quick sniff at the fruit. Your eyes shut in bliss, lemon distracting you with its fresh scent.
You’ve done well to distract Jeongguk from his work too. As much as he’d like to hold onto this vendetta, he knows the grudge was misdirected and undeserving. He also knows a part of his hesitancy with you is who you are. Knows the reasons why you were hired aside from the connections you had. And although you had a good personality, he can’t call you a personality hire if you knew how to do your job.
He won’t deny your accomplishments in school, allowing you to graduate with high honors by the time you were twenty. You were an adequate worker, but again, only because you were given unfair advantages — tools and resources that were taken away from someone else more deserving and eligible.
His grudge stretched beyond that, having been on the other receiving end of losing opportunities because of his upbringings. So yeah … maybe he’s biased.
You, on the other hand, want to hurl your laptop for other reasons. The laptop sits on top of the patio table, waiting for you to begin your long half day of work.
The metal legs of the empty chair across from you scrape against the concrete floor.
“Mind if I join you?”
You straighten from your slouched posture, surprised eyes meeting his neutral expression. Vacations were meant for fun, not the work you were trying to escape from. With Jeongguk here, you really can’t slack off. You quickly clear your items from the small table and gesture for him to sit.
“Terrible connection in the cottage.” You remark. “Gave me problems all morning.”
He hums, typing away on the laptop to make up for the lost time. You fall back into your work too seeing that there was a good motivator.
On your left side, there’s a small bowl of olives paired with the wine Jihyo delivered to your shared cottage. Jeongguk stares at the bowl, following one of the olives held by your fingers and popped in between your plump lips.
A small puff of air escapes through his nose at your winced expression from the initial burst of flavors, washing it down with a swig of wine.
“Would you like to try?” You push the bowl towards him.
“Didn’t look all that good.” He stares up, glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose. Though small, you detect a teasing tone in his comment.
“It was … different. But!” You perk, “When will we be in Italy again, in a beautiful villa eating olives while working?”
Answer? Never.
Such a ridiculous thought that he reaches into the small ceramic bowl to plop an olive into his mouth. The bitter tang of the small fruit amplifies on his tongue from your expectant stare.
Not unpleasant, but there were plenty of other cuisine choices in Italy worth trying.
Though, when will Jeon Jeongguk be in Italy again, in a beautiful villa eating olives while working with your melodic laughter resonating in his ears as you scoot your wine glass over to him?
Tongue no longer graced with the olive’s bitterness, a new type of bitterness spreads as Seojun and Jihyo announce they’re headed to the beach.
“How much longer do you need to work?” Jihyo pouts, hands on her hips as she peers down at your laptop. She’s not reading anything you have opened, deeming them unimportant especially when you should be spending time with her.
You offer a sheepish smile, afraid to voice your true thoughts in front of management. Jeongguk keeps his face trained to his screen, brows twitching in an attempt to hide his bemusement.
Had it been anyone else in front of you, you’d throw your hands in the air and say ‘Fuck it.’ But it was Jeongguk … one of the higher-ups you’d always admired — whose opinion you immensely cared for.
“Uncle …” Seojun frowns. “You promised you weren’t going to work.”
“Code red. Need to take care of this.” Jeongguk explains.
Seojun sighs, the expression resounds his frustration to his uncle’s work habits.
In the short span of time working at the company, you’ve never seen Jeongguk falter; yet, the man seated across from you wavers at his nephew’s disappointment.
“It’ll be quick.” He remedies.
You also know Jeongguk took his time. He’s meticulous and wants everything right the first time around. It appears Seojun knows this too, not taking his promises too seriously, and grunting a small ‘okay’ before he takes Jihyo’s hand to lead them both to the beach.
Jeongguk purses his lips, a vexed expression he doesn’t let linger for long. You shouldn’t meddle with family affairs, but you couldn’t help thinking back to the missed dinners, absent parent recitals, and text messages telling you to not wait up late from your father.
“Work’s never that important.” The words slip past your mouth before realizing it.
Jeongguk isn’t afraid to voice his response too, seemingly prepared for your judgment.
“Easy for you to say.” His eyes narrow. “Some people aren’t afforded breaks.”
You take another bite of the olives, hoping the flavor would conceal the shame. The invisible wall between you and Jeongguk grows higher and thicker, making it impossible to penetrate. You refocus on the task at hand.
Three hours pass with the sound of birds and ocean in the background — the sounds would have been enough for anyone to relax into their work, but all it does is make you yearn for fun. Makes you think anything might be better than being with the man seated across from you. Which is so unlike you when just a week ago, you’d do just about anything to be closer to him in the office.
Every five minutes, you have to look at the shoreline and the people enjoying the summer rays. It was a good distraction until the envy sets in.
Another deep sigh.
“Go.”
“Huh?” You look up from your laptop.
“I have access to your document in the shared drive. You won’t be leaving any time soon at the rate you’re moving.” He takes off his glasses, index and thumb pinching and rubbing to relieve himself of any tension. “Go spend some time with Jihyo.”
You almost think it’s a test until he looks at you questioningly for not having moved. You scramble to close out everything after a quick thank you before going back into the cottage to change. You shouldn’t feel guilty as you slip into your swimsuit and cover-up … shouldn’t feel guilty exiting the property, sneaking one final look back at the patio.
You shouldn’t ache the way you do for Jeongguk’s content smile when he nears the lemon tree.
Even Jeon Jeongguk needs breaks too.
You blame the aches from having laid down in the sand for an hour and not at the image of him back at the villa taking on your unfinished work. He made his decision, so why are you still feeling this way?
“Uncle!” Seojun beams. “You made it.”
At the acknowledgment, you lift your head up and it’s none other than the man who’s plagued your mind since you’ve left the villa. He’s changed into lighter clothing, a short-sleeve button up over his white tank top with some beach shorts. The tight tank top hugs around his figure, ab ridges outlined from his small chuckle. The contraction intensifies when he looks down at you and over your stringy two-piece bikini.
He clears his throat. “Was able to wrap up what I needed to get done for the day.”
“Good.” Seojun replies. “Should enjoy our time while we can.”
Jeongguk’s face falls; immediately, the moment’s swept away when Jihyo calls for Seojun to help her take pictures.
The older male settles next to you, mindful to not kick up any sand in the process. The couple eventually go to get some refreshments, leaving both you and Jeongguk under the rays of the sun.
He doesn’t say much … actually, he doesn’t say anything as he stares out to the bluest waters.
“Thank you, Jeongguk.” You say. “You didn’t have to.”
You wonder if your father had acted the same at work, taking on additional workload he didn’t necessarily have to at the expense of missing out on moments in your life.
Jeongguk isn’t your father. He didn’t have obligations to you. Didn’t need to sacrifice his own time for your sake.
The center of a candy was usually the sweetest — perhaps if you keep at it, you’ll discover more of Jeongguk’s sweetness too.
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
Being around Jeongguk has been a tad more tangible now that you’ve spent a few hours together the next couple of days working in the morning, ending the nights over dinner with the couple.
The next evening, Jihyo has you all crammed in a kitchen for a cooking lesson with a private chef. You’re on garlic peeling duties with Jeongguk, fingers sticky from the essence of the individual cloves, so sure this scent was going to linger on your skin.
Jeongguk remains unaffected, diligently peeling away. At the sight of you rubbing your sticky fingers together, he chuckles.
“Just wash your hands in between.”
The advice works. While you’ve barely peeled half a clove, Jeongguk was already on his second.
“Did you have ‘pro-garlic peeler’ on your resume?” You try teasing.
He pauses, a small smile on his lips as he continues peeling the cloves.
“My sister had me on garlic peeling duties whenever we cooked.”
As far as you’re aware from Jihyo, the topic of Seojun’s mother was unspoken … only knowing she passed when he was very young.
You work a little harder peeling the leftover cloves, running your hands under the faucet to rid yourself of the stickiness. The stickiness retained in your chest whenever Jeongguk peers over at your pile of perfectly peeled garlic. It’s retained throughout dinner and the glasses of wine served during and after a meal, following you as the group takes a walk on the beach the night before the rest of the wedding party was scheduled to meet for the rehearsal dinner tomorrow.
Jihyo yawns and announces she’ll head back to the villa to rest. Naturally, Seojun follows along. You expect Jeongguk to do the same, but he sits on the brick wall staring out at the beach.
You tuck your hair behind your ear and a strong, pungent scent greets you. Hand discreetly at the front of your face, you sniff.
“The smell doesn’t leave for a bit.” Jeongguk says. “My sister always recommended lemon juice and a little bit of soap.”
“Have you tried it?” You ask, tucking your hands underneath you to hide the excitement of Jeongguk initiating a conversation with you.
He shakes his head, “I like the smell of garlic.”
Be it from the glasses of wine served over dinner, you’re bolder as you ask about his sister. And he’s just as loose-lipped as he recalls memories of her. You learned she was four years older than Jeongguk, her first job was at their aunt and uncle’s convenience store, and they were ultimately left to fend for themselves the moment she had Seojun at eighteen.
Every story, small chuckle, and silence of the memory of his sister only softens the hard, jagged edges around Jeongguk.
“She sounds lovely.”
“She was,” he concedes, “Would’ve loved Italy too.” He speaks into the sea-salted air. He leans back, hands anchoring himself up as he looks up at the clear night sky. “Maybe give her son an earful about marrying too early.” She’d know firsthand how she lost out on her own developmental years as a result of having Seojun early with a man that wanted no part in fatherhood. Though, a small part of Jeongguk knows his sister would’ve adored Jihyo.
Back at the villa’s garden, you make a quick detour to the lemon tree, picking one from the bottom branches.
The lemon doesn’t get used quite yet when you both enter into the stuffy cottage. You and Jeongguk reopen all the windows to let some fresh air in.
You eye the unopened wine bottle — the night’s gone too well to end like this. Lemon placed on the counter, it’s spared and unscathed for the time being as you pop off the cork.
Wordlessly, you pour and slide the glass over to a receptive Jeongguk.
One glass turns to three over the course of the night. The alcohol loosens the year’s worth of work tension, eyes blinking slowly as he swirls the glass around.
“Do you plan to stay with the company until retirement?” You ask.
“Depends.”
“On?”
“If I have to keep overseeing project leads who can’t make their deadlines.”
Had you both been less drunk and not seated on the high stools of this lovely cottage in Sicily, you’d be more offended. Eyes bemused and lips curved at your exaggerated gasp, Jeongguk brings the glass of wine to his mouth, red staining and deepening the natural shade of pink on his lips.
You’ll take this. It’s a development in comparison to what you’ve experienced in working with the company … not to mention the ride on the gondola. You like this Jeongguk. Where he isn’t going on a tangent about deliverables and Key Performance Indicators.
“What about you?” He asks.
You swallow the last of the wine in your glass. “I’m not sure.”
Honestly, you thought you’d be at another place of employment after your one year anniversary at the company. Yet, you’re still here.
“Huh.”
“What?”
“Answered like a person with one foot out the door.” He shrugs.
“I don’t mind the company.” You pout.
He rolls his eyes. “You’re young. There’s more out there.”
“You’re staying.”
“Never said I was.”
Wait … you hadn’t accounted for the fact of Jeongguk leaving one day. He has so much more years of experience than you, so having a promotion elsewhere would be a cake walk. One of your incentives to stay might disappear one day without warning and it frightens you.
“The benefits are nice.” You reason. “It’s worth staying for.”
“The benefits are standard. Hm.” He purses his lips. Then, an expression you’ve never once witnessed stretches across his face. “That hot manager Jihyo mentioned can’t be enough incentive to stay.”
“She’s lucky she’s my best friend.” You groan.
He laughs through his nose, “You’ll know if a company is worth staying for. Don’t be afraid to venture out.”
Friends and family have often told you to look for a higher paying job after every promotion — never concerned whether you’re content with where you’re at.
You find it hard to believe just a couple days ago, Jeongguk was grilling you for being a nepo-baby, and now he’s mentoring you over wine. You take in his words, letting them swirl in your mind before shaking away thoughts of the future.
“Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind.”
He nods, taking another small sip, “If only Seojun listened more like that. That brat.” He lowers his head with a fond smile, orbs glimmering like the wine glass caught in the light.
You should hold off from asking any overbearing questions and end tonight on a high note, but that just wasn’t your style.
“Do you not support their marriage?”
“It’s unfavorable.” He sighs. “I’m sure Jihyo’s nice—”
“She is.” You interrupt.
“But she’s reckless and so is my nephew. They didn’t think this through.” A pause. “Doing things out of love only gets you so far.”
If life wasn’t about love, then what could it possibly be about?
He chuckles and mumbles to himself, “She’s too much like her.”
“Huh? Who?” Your brows scrunch from the cryptic words, trying to decipher who he was referring to. Foolish of you to think he’d answer as he gets up and empties his glass of wine into the sink, eyes locked on the counter where the lemon resides.
You were going to ask if he’d like to use the lemon too; though, he beats you to your question when he tucks in the stool.
“Get some rest, we have a long day tomorrow.”
You exert all your energy into the lemon, squeezing and wringing out the halved fruit to distract you of the confusion. Have you pushed for too much? Were you out of line wanting to know more about Jeongguk? You hope the lingering thoughts of your cottage mate disappears with the garlic stench after a thorough soak.
After your shower, you take one last peek at his door and the light emitting from the small slit persists even through the late hours. Was he still working or also plagued with the thoughts of tonight’s conversation?
It’s a little past midnight when you emerge into the kitchen again to get a glass of water only to notice a slightly ajar front door.
101 Dumb Ways to Die would commend you and your efforts to close the door. Your fingers touch the doorknob, ready to twist and secure the locks.
You die a little inside when you spot a figure outside near the lemon tree.
Jeongguk.
He sits there, staring at his hands before he lifts one of them up to his face. A small sniff, then his hand falls onto his lap again.
You lean against a nearby wall, hand clutching the glass of water close to your chest.
He bends down from his seated position and grabs a fallen lemon, uncaring if it came from the top or the bottom branch. Suddenly, he stands up and makes his way back to the cottage again.
“Fuck!” You whisper yell, scrambling to go back to your room but your foot catches onto your other ankle and you’re sent flying to the floor with the glass of water held close to your chest to brace the fall and potential damage.
Aside from a wet shirt and the bruise forming on your knee, the glass was still intact. What wasn’t intact was your pride as Jeongguk opens the door to find you laying on your side.
His eyes widen, immediately crouching down to check your conditions. “Are you okay?”
You could fake an episode of sleepwalking and walk back to your room, wet shirt and all, but then you’ll be labeled as the colleague who sleepwalks.
“Oof,” You grab his extended hand, the one without the lemon, and pull yourself up to a sitting position. “Y-yeah, um, just wanted some water.” You peer down at the pool of water around you and flush harder.
He grabs a nearby cloth to clean up the mess and when he’s done, he holds his hand out again, “Can you stand?”
You nod, hand engulfed in his warmth as he tugs you up along with him. You walk stiffly next to him and thank him after he hands you a spare towel in the kitchen.
You should return to your room to nurse your broken pride; yet, your feet stay planted as Jeongguk gets out the cutting board.
“Oh, there’s still half a lemon in the fridge.”
Nodding, he retrieves the lemon and he squeezes the sliced half with ease. He dips his fingers in first, spreading the juice all over his hands and in between the crevices just as you did. You watch his fingers spread the juices all over the top of his veiny hands, light from the kitchen emulating the glisten on his skin.
A tingly sensation starts at your fingertips and you clench your fists tightly before it travels up your arms, unsure why your body is reacting at the simple act.
God, did you hit your head on something during the fall?
“You sure you’re okay?” He asks, breaking you out of your daze.
You blink, body automatically moving around to check for any soreness. High knees in place and a twist to your side, you confirm your health condition. You do one last stretch, intertwining your fingers and reaching up to the ceiling.
All’s well, so it seems.
Actually, no.
The action lifts your camisole, exposing the lower half of your stomach. Jeongguk’s gaze dips to your full hips and areas where the sun can’t fully reach.
“Yeah, all good.” You swallow, arms coming down and holding your hands behind your back.
Lights shut off, you and Jeongguk make your way back to your bedrooms, steps heavier as you near your door.
Suddenly, your hand reaches out, weak fingers wrapped around his wrist. He looks down at you with a raised brow, unmoving, so you tighten your grip around him.
“I saw you outside.” You confess, voice small and hesitant. “Are you okay?”
Jeongguk didn’t owe you an answer. But after all the time spent leading up to this moment, you think something should’ve changed by now.
His jaw clenches, eyes swirling with a mixture of uncertainty and discomfort as he considers the option of being honest.
He purses his lips and shakes his head no.
Be it your underdeveloped prefrontal lobe or your innate desire to fix a troubled man, your fingers tighten around his wrist.
“Is there something I can do–” The latter part of your question gets cut short at another shake of his head.
Your default solution is to deflect and lessen the embarrassment with cynicalism and a humorless laugh. “I know you hate me and all–”
He laughs, too — the dullness masking the irritability behind your unfinished statement.
“I don’t hate you.” He pauses and ponders his next words. “Whatever I’m going through right now has nothing to do with how I feel about you.”
Maybe … if you do make it about you, Jeongguk might forget about his bigger worries. The day has gone so well and all your effort’s about to be undone with what you do next. You step closer, gleaning at his reaction and any indication of his repulsion from your proximity.
“If we didn’t work at the same company, how would you feel about me then?” You ask.
His stare darkens. Pattern recognition from all the other fleeting moments in Italy only pushes you to do something you’d never have the courage to in a professional environment where you’d both break all code of conduct.
What happens in Italy, stays in Italy … right?
“We’d get along.” You answer for him.
“We’d be strangers.” He corrects. “I don’t need twenty year old friends listening to my problems.”
Good thing you’re not twenty and good thing you don’t want to be friends with Jeongguk. In the span of this conversation, you and Jeongguk now share the same air and warmth as you press your front to his hard chest. He doesn’t pull away from your softness whether it be through the silky camisole, your nature, or exposed skin … he lets himself soak in what you offer him.
And when you tip-toe closer to his face, he doesn’t move, allowing you to do as you like despite all signs in his head telling him to turn you away.
“We’d get along.” You repeat, eyes bold and hopeful as you stare into his hooded ones. “You’d let me help you forget about your problems.”
Cause you’d create new ones for Jeon Jeongguk as you press your lips to his.
The original hold you had on his wrist ceases as your nimble fingers find refuge on the ends of his cotton shirt. Your thighs tense from the vibrations of his small groan, the pleasure pangs intensifying when his hands cup your jaw. Lips soft and so rightfully slotted on yours, your eyes flutter shut and embrace the abundant hues of yellow and green similar to the villa’s lemon tree.
The crisp citrus scent from his fingers warms and melts you further into his lips. He parts his mouth slightly, and for a moment, just a moment … you hope he’d run his tongue on yours.
Your hope gets wringed out like the used lemons residing in the wastebin the exact moment he says your name and pulls away, chest moving in tandem with his strained breaths.
“This isn’t right.” He breathes, swallowing as he steps back to create some space between your bodies.
“I–”
“Goodnight.”
His door shuts, no different than how he shuts you out of the life you hoped to get a better glimpse of. Your fingers trace your lips, remembering how he felt against you before he took everything including your pride with him. You also shut your door, only bringing humiliation and rejection back in with you.
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
You barely slept.
Instead, you chose to put in the extra work you needed to meet your deliverables for your client. You locked yourself in the bedroom — rather brave through the shitty internet connection until it was time to meet up with the rest of the bridal party who arrived last night.
“So,” Yebin starts, “I hear the best man is a hottie and you’re staying in the same cottage as him?”
You splutter into your drink, quickly grabbing the napkin on your lap to dab away the cascading liquid on your chin.
“Uh, wha–”
“Jihyo mentioned it in the group chat. What? Been too busy with him to catch up in the thread?” She wiggles her brows with a playful grin.
You push your body forward to give Jihyo a tiny glare. She sits prettily at the top of the table, the only person wearing white while the rest of you were in different variations of yellow to match the wedding theme.
“What?” She says with a mouthful. “He is objectively handsome. Not a surprise, I mean, look at my Seojun.”
“Isn’t he in his forties?” Another one of the girls asks.
“Thirty-seven.” Jihyo corrects. “We celebrated his birthday recently.”
“Basically forty.” Yebin retorts and turns back to you. “So what’s he like?”
You’re thankful for the soft breeze in the midst of Italy’s humid summer — helps you cool the sweat sitting uncomfortably on your skin, both from the rising afternoon temperatures and last night’s memories.
“He’s … fine.” You pause and try to come up with other adjectives to better describe him, ultimately coming short and resorting to a foolproof excuse. “We haven’t really spoken.”
“Oh, please. Aside from his nephew, Jeongguk’s more friendly with you than he has been to me.”
Yeah, ‘cause you also work in the same building as him forty hours a week for the past year, but no one here needs to know that. The conversation eventually shifts over to Jihyo’s wedding itinerary, makeup and hair plans, and what the other girls plan to do after the wedding dinner rehearsal. You enjoyed your time in the smaller group, but you also valued the community the other girls brought in this part of the trip. You visit the nearby boutiques, splurge on things you could most definitely find back at home, because … when were you going to be in Italy with your girls again?
“Remember, be there at 8 p.m. The venue’s gates close five minutes after.” Jihyo reminds.
“Yes, ma’am. Got it marked down in our calendars.” Yebin yawns, still slightly jetlagged and ready for a much needed nap after the day’s festivities. You and Jihyo drop off the girls at the front of their hotel and begin the walk back to the villa. Would’ve been quicker to take a cab, but Jihyo wanted to walk off her second gelato and you didn’t mind not being in the same vicinity as your cottage mate all that soon.
“You nervous for tomorrow?” You ask, steps slowing as you both near the villa.
“No,” she smiles fondly at a passing thought. “But I am anxious for the future. Don’t know how long it’ll be till my parents want to talk to me.”
You’ve thought about the times you’ve fought with your parents — nothing as big as marrying someone they didn’t approve of. Hopefully Jihyo’s parents will come around. Love, from a parent at least, should be unconditional.
She reads your thoughts with a chuckle and nudge to your shoulder. “Hey, I’m okay. It’s me and Seojun against the world.”
“They’ll come around.” You reassure. “You also have your friends too, so you’re never alone.”
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
“And then, the maid of honor and best man will walk here.” Violetta, the wedding planner, points down the long stretch to the altar.
She looks over to the group, trying to single out the girl with that title since Jeongguk was the only male aside from the groom. You step out, having avoided Jeongguk all day with the wedding party, there are just some things you can’t avoid.
You avoid looking at the older man, keeping your stares locked on the wedding planner and aisle markings.
“Oh, to be maid of honor.” Yebin mumbles jokingly and the group of girls erupt into a small fit of giggles.
Jeongguk pays no mind and extends his arm for you to hold. Practice. Yes, this was still a rehearsal. You might’ve imagined his tense inhale as you press your body closer, breast pushing against his arm to see if the action could produce a similar sound or reaction.
Nothing.
After the rehearsal, you and Jeongguk still avoid each other like the plague, unwilling to address the elephant in the room. You try to sleep, tossing and turning all night until you made the executive decision for some much needed fresh air.
Part of you worries Jeongguk might also be outside, claiming the lemon tree as his area of respite. Can’t be his if you claimed it first. Unfortunately, the spot was occupied … not by him at least.
Pulling the metal chair, Seojun looks up, startled, but relaxes at the sight of a familiar face.
“Can’t sleep?” He asks.
“Yeah. Too stuffy in the cottage.” You lie, unwilling to admit the actual source of your unrest. “You?”
“Yeah.” He looks into the distance, worries swirling in his orbs. “I think my uncle’s right.”
Your brows pull together, head tilting in confusion.
“We’re too rash. Jihyo’s parents might never speak to her again and it’s all my fault. And I,” Seojun begins to crumble at the weight of his realization. “I don’t know if I’m enough for her to lose everything.”
You know more than anyone that there are some things money and power can’t buy. Jihyo wasn’t risking anything because Seojun was everything. Because if life wasn’t about love, then what was it about?
“You’re enough for Jihyo.”
“Uncle said–”
“Screw what Jeongguk thinks.” You interrupt, gasping at your sudden abrasiveness. “Wait, I don’t mean any offense to your uncle …”
His laugh could’ve woken up the entire villa, but you’re thankful to see this side of him in comparison to how he was a moment ago.
“No, no,” he chuckles, “I know he’s not the most likeable person.”
“He’s not … awful.”
Seojun nods, tilting his head down to conceal a tender smile you’ve witnessed whenever he was around Jihyo — now you understand those were reserved for his loved ones. “He used to be different … lighter, does that even make sense?”
You agree, waiting for Seojun’s next words.
“Uncle was fun.” You learn how Jeongguk would take little Seojun to the zoo every year because his mother would be too busy with work, along with the late night video game sessions he would partake in despite his busy university schedule.
“He was in his second year of university preparing to study abroad … I don’t know much, but something didn’t work out and another student was chosen instead of him. Mom worked hard so that she could support uncle and his dreams.”
“Worked too hard — damn workaholics.” His smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “I know he means well not wanting me to rush into things without a proper safety net.”
You think back to a younger Jeongguk navigating life alone with a young child … he couldn’t have been any older than you — a baby raising another baby with no one to turn to.
“Ah, I’m sorry,” Seojun shakes away some thoughts, “I didn’t mean to dump all of this on you. I’m sure you’re tired–”
“No, no,” You wave your hands. “I don’t mind. You’re marrying my best friend and whether her family or Jeongguk approves, it doesn’t matter. I’ve seen how happy you make her — how relaxed she is around you.” You offer a warm and comforting smile to which Seojun returns at the mention of your friend. “We’re both in this for Jihyo’s happiness. You deserve to be happy too.”
“Yeah, we do.” He replies, shoulders sagging in relief.
You linger outside a little longer after Seojun’s departure, begrudgingly going back into the cottage. Before entering your room, you take one look at Jeongguk’s room, noting the small sliver of light from underneath his door.
You remember all the late nights waiting for your father’s lights to turn off … wondering when you’d be enough for his attention. And as you shut your door to your room, you hope that was enough to garner Jeongguk’s attention too.
⋆。𖦹 ˚ 𓇼 ˚。⋆
Jihyo loved everything about yellow. Loved the song by Coldplay and loved her flowers yellow — thinks she saw yellow when she met Seojun. Her bridesmaid dresses had to be yellow, as with everything in the wedding.
You see yellow everywhere too: the sand in the distance, wedding favors in the form of bagged perle di sole candies, and the boutonniere pinned on the left side of Jeongguk’s vest.
Yellow blurs around you during the ceremony, tearful gazes exchanged with the other bridesmaids.
Jihyo had always centered her world around her friendships — no man has ever been enough to pull her away from that value. Though, as she stands across from Seojun, her hands in his, it seemed as though nothing could’ve pried them apart from each other’s gravitational pulls. Your eyes peer over the wedding attendees, taking in their expectant stares and proud smiles — even Jeongguk seemed to have softened at the sight.
When it was time for the vows, you hand them over to Jihyo from behind, who took them without turning around, eyes still locked onto her soon-to-be husband.
She takes a steadying breath before speaking: “Seojun. These past years with you have been the happiest of my life. I could’ve never imagined meeting anyone like you. Now, I won’t call you my best friend, because that spot is taken and I think my lovely maid of honor might have some things to say about that–” The wedding party sounded a collective chuckle. You smile to yourself, eyes instinctively finding Jeongguk’s, who had already been looking your way in confirmation of your title.
“But I’m so happy to have found you, that I’m able to call you my friend, lover, and now, husband. I know a lot of people thought we were rushing into this, and they might be right. It is early, but I’ve never been as certain about anything as I am about wanting to spend the rest of my life with you. Seojun, you are the most wonderful and kindest person — better than I can ever hope to deserve, I love you.” Her voice had become increasingly more unstable as she went and she quickly wiped her eyes, not wanting to ruin her bridal make-up. Seojun wasn’t fairing any better, softly cupping her cheek and kissing her lips, whispering a small gratitude to her.
“Excuse me?” The officiant interrupts. “We’re not quite there yet.”
Laughing, the pair separates and refocuses their attention back to the ceremony. You turn to your fellow bridesmaids after hearing a quiet sniffle from Yebin. You carefully lean back into her, nudging her shoulder in comfort.
“Jihyo, you son of a bitch.” The girl mutters, dotting the corner of her eye with a tissue.
You chuckle, moving back into your position after assessing everyone’s conditions.
When you find the confidence to check on Jeongguk, he’s just as affected and politely turns away from the couple to hide his emotions.
At the wedding reception, you watch Jihyo and her husband dance to every song on their playlist, joined by their guests, eventually being the last ones standing as the night progresses. The ache on the soles of your feet grow by the hour, and you find yourself sitting alone, nursing your drink and watching your best friend soak in happiness.
Yellow persists in the form of strung lights on the small dance floor. Though, a new opponent, green, enters when you catch some wedding guests approaching an unsuspecting Jeongguk.
As the maid of honor, you should stay for the night even if it’s nearing 2 a.m. Selfishly, you can’t bring yourself to. You tell Jihyo you’re not feeling well and that you’re going to walk back to the cottage to rest. She looks at you with concern, but she nods and asks you to text her once you’ve made it back.
Ten steps out the venue, you hear some whistles and chuckles. Shit. You walk quicker and a slimy hand wraps around your wrist.
The men smile at you, saying something you can’t really decipher. If all fails after your persistent ignorance to the Italian language, your heels make an excellent weapon of defense.
“C'è un problema?” A familiar voice says in the distance.
Immediately, the man releases your wrist and holds his hands up. The group of men shuffles away, mumbling to themselves as they look back at your savior.
“You okay?” Jeongguk asks.
“Yep.” You answer quickly, steps resuming in the direction of the villa.
Jeongguk follows closely behind you, silent as he has been all night.
“Aren’t you supposed to stay with the bride? Maid of honor duties.”
“Aren’t you supposed to stay with the groom? Best man duties.” You retort with no malice.
“Touché.” He contemplates his next words. “I’ve got an early flight tomorrow.”
Your brows furrow, and an immature part of you assumes you’re the reason for his early departure. He quickly follows up with, “There’s a fire I have to put out at work.”
The bitter memories of your father leaving for work resurfaces again. Would it be so awful to not think about work and be with his loved ones?
You wave off those feelings and express your gratitude instead. “Thanks for helping me back there. You never mentioned knowing Italian.”
Would’ve come in handy during the ample times you all had to order food, but this was not the right moment to joke.
“Studied some basic phrases before going abroad. Didn’t end up in Italy though.”
You freeze a little, remembering the small detail Seojun mentioned the night before about Jeongguk’s missed opportunity.
Silence takes over and continues even as you both face your bedroom doors.
“Jeongguk.” You say, before he enters his room. “I hope what happened between us doesn’t impact our work. Please forget it happened — I’m truly ashamed and sorry.”
He nods, jaw clenched and tense.
“Have a safe flight home. See you in the office.” No other words are needed in your retreat back into your room.
The knot at the back of your neck strains and you can’t wait to finally shed your makeup, tight bun, and dress.
You [2:18 a.m.]: Made it to the cottage 💛
Bestie Ji [2:19 a.m.]: GOOD
Bestie Ji [2:19 a.m.]: JEONGGU SAI HES HEDIN TO COTT TO
Bestie Ji [2:19 a.m.]: ILY
Bestie Ji [2:19 a.m.]: im drun
You smile at your phone, typing a quick reply and before you hit enter, you hear a knock on your door.
Door swung open, your eyes widen at the sight of Jeongguk, tie loose around his neck and hair tussled as if he ruminated for an eternity before knocking your door.
“It’s been nice with you in Italy.” His arm from behind comes to the front with a small object. You remember it from your last day in Venice: the green masquerade mask. “Safe travels home.”
You take the little green mask in your hands, frown deepening at the sentiment.
“Why would you get this for me?” You ask.
His tongue probes against his cheek, eyes coming down to look at your figure in your yellow halter dress. The same fleeting stares you’ve grown accustomed to in the time spent in Italy, unaware these glances have always existed without your knowledge back at home. He laughs through his nose and shakes his head.
He brings his eyes back to your face. “You’re a smart girl, graduated with honors and all … so think a little harder for me.”
You shake your head, afraid of the aftermath of another wrong move that could jeopardize your heart.
“I don’t know if I can …”
Leaders take initiative — you’re nowhere near that point in your career and life. Jeongguk recognizes this too, which is why he walks you backwards into the room. His fingers trace the intricate beadings on the mask still in your hands.
“Here, we’re just two people who met through the people we love. No roles or responsibilities. I only know you as Jihyo’s friend. You’re just … you, and I’m just Jeongguk.”
“And who are you, Jeongguk?” You place the mask onto a nearby dresser, eyes never leaving the man in front of you.
He looks down at you again, a type of stare only capable of burning and tainting every inch of your being. He’s afraid to admit who he really is — what he actually wants, knowing he can’t fully have even if it was ready for him to take. Though, with only a couple hours to spare in Italy, he wants to use what little time he has on an experience he would never let himself indulge in back at home.
It’s what vacations are meant for, right?
“Someone that wants your help. Someone that wants to finish what you started two nights ago.” He answers.
It doesn’t make sense with you — he doesn’t make sense with you just like when he leans down to press his lips on yours. The kiss is punishing, no colors of yellow like the kiss from two nights ago. Yellow is only meant for lovers and Jeongguk is no lover. Would be the only logical reason you’d now see black and blue — colors of old bruises and wounds left unattended for too long, and Jeongguk has far too many to count.
“Fuck,” He says in between kisses, shrugging off his vest, “Tell me to stop.”
You whimper, shaking your head and looping your arms over his neck to bring him closer. He pushes his tongue past your lips, savoring the way you moan around and suck on his wet muscle.
The only thing that makes sense is how your dress, the only yellow left, needs to come off. Your hands move behind your neck to undo the tight knot, letting the top fall down your front. Taking Jeongguk’s large hands, you take note of their softness, like sand — so malleable and so much harder to hold. You place them on your breasts instead.
He groans, the sound so painful and full of want to give into his desires.
“This can’t mean anything.” He says through a harsh breath. “You know that, right?”
“It’s okay.” You reply, moaning again as the pressure from his hands increases. “I’m … I’m okay with that.”
You’re not and Jeongguk knows this too. He’s aware of the subtle glances in the time he’s worked with you, your shift in demeanor when he enters a room, and how your eyes search for his approval when none was ever needed. He knows you won’t be okay with this just being a one night stand or quick fuck, but it has to be because you and Jeongguk don’t make sense.
Not under the dull fluorescent lights of the company building, not in Italy.
His teeth grazes your skin, leaving a trail of pain and pleasure behind its wake. You quiver and his body presses harder against yours in panic that if he leaves any space in between, the distance would only grow should he second-guess.
Dress bunched up at your midsection, he turns you away, eyes immediately landing where your mistake from your teenage years resided right above your pert ass.
Was this going to be another mistake too?
Your hands brace yourself on the dresser, arching from his hand tracing down your back and down your ass. He pauses and waits for your nod to proceed. Palm up, he runs his hand over the pathetic cloth you’d call your underwear now completely soaked through and scrunched to the side of your pussy.
He sucks in a breath, “Kissing gets you like this, hm?”
You shudder, praying he eventually moves. His middle finger probes gently at your sodden folds, gathering your arousal. He stays doing this for a couple minutes, listening to your soft sighs, wondering when you’d begin to beg for him to continue.
And when you don’t ask for more, it aggravates him realizing he’s the one who needs more out of something that’s supposed to be meaningless. As the older adult, he should be the gentleman with better restraint, but he’s here in your room seeking something he can’t find anywhere else:
A distraction from all the buried guilt and pain — for once, he wants to win.
He somehow gets you perched on the dresser, head between your thighs as he eats you out both as a punishment and reward. The bottom half of your dress hangs over the side of your hips, thighs spread wide open as Jeongguk thrusts his tongue into your cunt.
He knows this is just sex … worse that you’re a younger colleague whom he has vehemently denied his attractions for. But he’s here in Italy where he’s tasted olives, rinsed his memories of past loved ones with citrus … he should enjoy this trip — enjoy you. Because when was Jeongguk going to be in Italy again fucking you in a shared cottage?
“Jeong–fuck, m-yeah, right there.” You cheer, fingers carding through his hair.
Your encouragement only spurs him on to work harder, lapping over your swollen clit until you tense and cease all noise in concentration for the impending orgasm. It’s all over when you fight his hold and win the battle with your legs clamped tightly around his head. You cum with a small sob, thighs shaking around him as he continues to eat you out.
He replaces his tongue with two fingers, lazily pumping his digits in you while he kisses your lips with the taste of you still on his tongue. Meanwhile, you fumble clumsily with his buttons and zipper, jaded by how much you want him.
He’s just as eager, moaning and grinding his cock into your hand when you’ve finally freed him of his confinements.
Hoisting you in his arms, he brings you to the edge of your bed, groaning at how you automatically spread wider on the softer surface. So ready for him to do more with you until he realizes:
“Shit, I don’t have a condom.”
You hold yourself up with your forearms, legs still spread wide open for him despite his hesitance to move forward. His teeth sink onto his bottom lip, troubled dimples appearing as he stares at your glistening pussy clenching around nothing.
“I’m on birth control.” You assure and add, “You can pull out if you want.”
What’s another bad idea added into the pile?
He strokes over his length, squeezing harder at the tip and lines himself up. You whine and circle your hips from the hard poke at your entrance, arousal coating his bare cock. He doesn’t push himself in just yet, watching as a bead of precum smears at your opening … a silent territorial marking.
You’re his for tonight.
His thumb lands on your clit, rubbing it up and down. You keen, eyes shutting to concentrate on the added stimulation around the bundle of nerves.
“You’ve always been too rash on your decisions.” He pushes the tip of his cock into you, teeth biting the inside of his cheek. “Gotta work on that.” As if he’s not about to make an irrevocable mistake himself.
“High risk, high rewards … r-right?” You stammer through a shaky breath as he pushes more of him into you, uncaring that there’d been little to no prep. But that doesn’t matter, all your fantasies were coming true at this very moment and you’ll take whatever he gives you.
He gives you two more orgasms. One with your ankles by his ears. The other one where you lay on your side, memorizing the way his fingers dig into your skin as he pumps his thick shaft into you. You hike your knee closer to your chest to allow him to sink even deeper into you, hitting a specific spot repeatedly to burn figments of stars behind your lids.
The room’s hot and musty — didn’t help that neither of you remembered to air out the cottage upon arrival, but no one cared about that at the moment. Your sweat gathers behind your knees and drips down the slope of your thighs as Jeongguk continues fucking you into the mattress with an intense need.
“Gonna cum.” He announces, jaw going slack as his balls grow heavy with the need to release. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum.”
“Want you to cum for me.” You nod, and the slapping of his skin on yours grows as he moves quicker and harder.
You moan, brows scrunched in anticipation for Jeongguk to pull out and the feeling of being stuffed full by him will cease all together. And through your past experiences with other men, sex typically ends once they cum, so you ready yourself for the mirage to end — ready yourself to face reality again. Your lower half relaxes, waiting for him to turn your body so that he could unload everything on your stomach.
Two things happen.
He pushes deep inside you, stilling as he fills you with his arousal.
Hands soft as sand, cradle your jaw for a searing kiss to conceal words he shouldn’t utter to a colleague, let alone a direct report.
Minutes pass like this and you come to find out: sex doesn’t stop when Jeongguk finishes inside you.
He lays down next to you and hoists your body on top of his, movements swift in slipping his sensitive cock back into your cum-filled hole. He hisses, fighting through the overstimulation in acceptance of the punishment for all the terrible acts he’s committed with you. Again, both a punishment and a reward as he lets you ride him, watching the way your hips roll smoothly over his. Your mixed juices trail down his length and over his balls the more you move and bounce.
He doesn’t tell you to give him another orgasm, knowing you’re working hard to get there again.
“Don’t wanna stop. Wanna do this with you all night long.” Your breath hitches as the pleasure shifts into a type of pain no one can see. And no matter how you try to fight the physical effects of the hardest orgasm of your life, your body gives into the exhaustion and slumps over Jeongguk’s sweaty body.
In your slumber, you feel the sand, the breeze, and the absence of another human body. The next morning only proves your reality when you wake up clothed and sore from last night’s affair … with Jeongguk nowhere in sight.
You frown, tucking the sheets closer to your chin and watching the tree branches scrape against your opened window. The air in the room was no longer stuffy, ridding any evidence of what you and Jeongguk did.
Summers in Italy were magical.
Though, the fact stands: magic was nothing but illusions, deluding you from the truth. And you feigned indifference when Jihyo tells you Jeongguk had gone home for an important project — you ignored the hurt and betrayal. You had never been enough for your father to come home, so it was easy to turn a blind eye at the heaviness in your stomach from the thoughts of hoping you’d be enough to make Jeongguk stay.
Another couple of days in Italy go by with those illusions till the truth sets in the day you return to work.
A couple coworkers stop you on the way to your cubicle, asking you for a trip recap. Your debrief takes longer as intended — half due to wanting to avoid work and the other half as a result of your efforts to leave out key details of a certain someone.
You could’ve taken another path to your desk — one that kept you from the usual ajar door. Perhaps the magic followed you back home and you’ve alluded to think Jeongguk’s stares trail after your figure when you walked past his office.
The magical illusions continue as you settle into your cube, a bright yellow sticky note on your keyboard with a familiar handwriting reads: Lunch at Romano’s. - J
Even if the center of the candy happened to be sour, you have to see through it — you want to see through it.
fin.
a/n: missed me? cuz i’ve been missenU. ahh, ahh?? 🥹 i’ll see yall in about 1-2 months with something new! in the meantime, go send your well wishes to the bday girlie!! toodles ♡
also s/o to my bestie @takeitawaykenny for beta’ing!! love ya pookie
꣑ৎ fighting with satoru leads to him forcing you to ride him
The last thing you wanted to do was get into an argument with your roommate and best friend. Yet you found yourself going back and forth with him & it didn’t look like it was coming to an end any time soon.
“I don’t understand how I’m not allowed to have boys over but you’re free to bring home girls, it’s totally unfair Satoru!” You yelled, voice turning raspy.
It’s been hours since this argument began and he was getting sick of it.
“The difference between us is that I didn’t invite that girl over to fuck, did I?” He shot back, a vein forming at his temple.
His hand reached up to his face, sliding off his glasses to set them aside on the counter. “I came home with her because we had a project to do and the library was closed. And you know this because I texted you earlier about it.”
“So? She was totally giving you bedroom eyes!”
“And what if she was? Doesn’t mean I gave in and started humping her like a dog in heat. I’m not that easy, sweets.”
But you were.
You were not about to give in because he used your favorite pet name, and you definitely weren’t going to allow him to see the effect it had on you.
“I don’t know why me bringing a boy over concerns you either.”
“Watch that tone.” He warned. His eyes have darkened enough to match the late night shadows seeping into the kitchen, rain being muffled by the windows. Your lip trembled, being utterly frustrated. It’s not like you even did anything with the guy, you just wanted to make him jealous – get back at him for inviting that girl over.
Satoru noticed your pout, sighing through his nose as all previous anger faded. “Baby.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“Why not?” He closed in, cupping your cheek in his warm hand. “You love it when I use sweet names on you.”
You pulled away from his touch, still pissed. “We’re just roommates, that’s why.” That certainly got him to raise a brow, a slight tilt at his head as he took in your words. “Just roommates? Am I not your best friend? Am I not the one that makes you feel good?”
Your breath hitched, knowing what he was referring to.
You had come home stressed about some class and it didn’t help that it was ovulation week as well, making you all pent up. Thankfully, Satoru didn’t mind helping you out on the very counter he was leaning against. “What was your goal when you brought him over? To make me jealous? Get your pay back?”
Well, yes.
But you were not going to admit that so easily.
“If I hadn’t made it clear enough, sweets, you’re the only girl I want. Why would I be stupid to put my dick inside someone who isn’t you?” His vulgar words strike again at your inner core, forcing your thighs to clench.
“Satoru..” Your cheeks heated up.
“I’m going to ask you again, and you’re going to answer honestly. Are we just roommates?”
Of course not. Roommates don’t just allow the other to ride them like rabbits in heat the way you were doing right now. Your clothes were discarded on the floor, shaky hands rubbing up and down his abs all while he watched.
A smirk was lifting at his lips, enjoying the way you struggled to do all of the work. He wanted to touch your tits, give them the little kisses they deserved. But hearing you beg for his touch was far better.
“Please– I said I was s-sorry..” Your apologies fell upon deaf ears. This was your punishment after all. You could barely register your own pleas as his tip grazed your puffy folds. “You’re going to ride me and I’m not going to help for shit.”
And he kept his word because he hasn’t done anything more than letting out the occasional grunt. It was genuinely pissing you off.
“Please,” You tried again, leaving sloppy but sweet kisses on his lips that he didn't reciprocate. Not even when you picked up your pace or slowed it down did he react.
Nothing was working.
Not until he saw you begin to sob, hiding your pretty face in his neck did he soften up. “Hey, hey.. It’s okay, sweet girl. I forgive you, you did so good, took your punishment like the good girl you are. Don’t cry, you’re making me feel bad.” His expression softened, large hand rubbing the small of your back as he coo’ed in your ear at your hiccups.
You sniffled, chasing your nearing orgasm now that he praised you. “Am gonna cum..” You gasped, clawing at his back. Satoru fully wrapped his arms around you, bouncing you harshly on his lap. “Go ahead.”
White dots filled your sight when you spilled on his dick, legs trembling. He followed soon after, releasing deep in you. “Good job, baby. Don’t you ever think that shit again. I don’t want anyone but you, and it’s time to realize that.”
You nodded, placing your lips on his, finally receiving the kiss you needed.