J Shields

J. 31. A caffine dependent life form.

[theconcealedweapon]

[whatevergreen]

Historical facts revealing corruption and racism are only dangerous to those who are currently corrupt and racist.

[twinkenjoyer-deactivated2023083]

if the truth is so dangerous to the current order, maybe that order needs to be dismantled

[eggothesquirrel]

[surprise-adoption]

Bottle rocket under ice

[overtheunderpass]

rad 

[edwardspoonhands]

I’m pretty sure that the reason the ice fractured into six slices is the same reason snowflakes are often six sided and it has to do with the shape of a molecule of water and I just think that’s so freaking cool.

[opulene-archive]

How would it even stay lit though?

[orangejuiceaholic-deactivated20]

!!!!! it IS actually because of the structure of water molecules! Water molecules are fuckin weird, as are lots of other liquid substance molecules, because theyre shaped like fuckin HEXAGONS! hexagons are those weird, six-sided shapes that re very sturdy, but they dont tend to sit very well when stacked together. thats why, when you fill up a glass of water to its full capacity, it can go OVER the brim a little and not spill over. It’s also why water beads.

anyway, so since water is essentially made up of a gazillion little hexagons, it tends to gather into larger hexagons as it shapes together. this is not visible unless the water is in a solid form, aka ice. when the water is split, it tends to crack around the established hexagons. that bottle rocket exploded in the PERFECT place to show this phenomenon and its geeking me out.

ALSO! the bottle rocket stays lit because the fuse was definitely waterproof and made with magnesium and an oxidizer of some sort. this means that they will burn underwater because they dont need the oxygen from the air to stay lit. thats so fucking weird isnt it. im tipsy and its the 4th of july. sorry for the science haha

[inside-us-only-stars]

Don’t you dare apologize for science

[kyraneko]

Reblogging for science, explosions, and cool hexagons!

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

Quiz time!

Who knows what this is called?

The cardboard bit around my coffee. What's it called? If you know, you are already upset. If you don't know, you are about to be upset.

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

[whyactlikeahuman]

[quasikool]

#i literally crack up everytime #at least ten of the notes are from me

[jesusislove]

[sergle]

[jesusislove]

[sergle]

[cheese24k]

[clambistro-deactivated20161211]

Ahh, it’s back

[julierthanyou]

i have disproportionately strong feelings about this.

[party-wok]

every time i say “nah i’m not gonna watch it again.” BUT I STILL DO EVERY TIME.

[bestrooftalkever]

YEAUGH

[punkconcert]

John Mulaney, a true ADHD icon

[somewhat-honest-abe]

I love how he gave this bit at an autism benefit because it is also a heavy Autism Mood™

[gh0sthoodie]

This is the most relatable thing I’ve ever seen.

[vulpeculavolans]

TRANSCRIPT:

JOHN MULANEY: I normally don’t notice people. I zone out constantly. Have you ever zoned out for a few minutes? I’ve been zoned out since 2014.

AUDEINCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: I just - all day long, I wander into traffic walking like Charlie Chaplin, listening to a podcast while thinking about a different podcast. 

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: I can zone out anywhere - I was at the doctor’s office, he was reading me the results of a blood test, it was important I listened, and I zoned out! I was like, “nah, I’m gonna stare at the wall and think my thoughts”.

AUDIENCE MEMBER WHOOPS

MULANEY: I was like, “huh. None of the Beatles had moustaches… but then one day, all of them had moustaches.”

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: “That’s weird, I can’t think of a time a group has done that”. Some people in my life don’t want me to zone out as much - they want me to focus, and they want me to be in the moment, and they want me to do this by meditating. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried meditating, but I’ve been trying it. This is how you meditate, okay? You sit on the floor with your back perfectly straight, which I hate more than ISIS -

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: I don’t like sitting up straight! Alright?! It’s never gonna happen! If meditating was sitting hunched over on the toilet with your elbow on your knee while kind of looking at your phone, I’d be the Dalai Lama.  

AUDIENCE LAUGHS/APPLAUDS

MULANEY: I don’t like sitting up straight. So you sit up straight, and you breathe, and this helps you stay in the moment. Don’t bother! The moment is mediocre at best!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: I mean, it’s fine. Let’s all try right now - let’s all be in the moment, in silence, right now. [A HALF-SECOND PAUSE] Sucked, right? Not fun at all! 

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: That was boring! You gotta zone out! You have an imagination! You have a movie theatre in your brain that plays fake arguments that you win.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS/APPLAUDS

MULANEY: Have you ever just been sitting there thinking about something for twenty, twenty-five minutes, and all of a sudden you’re like “oh my god, I’m driving!” and you remember? You’re like -

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: “I’m going seventy-five miles an hour! I have been for a while! I could’ve changed so many lives!” Sometimes, my wife - I have this wife - she’ll be like, “are you watching the road?” and I’m always like, “I am looking through the windshield.”

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

MULANEY: “And I’m not gonna hit anyone, but no. I’m thinking about the Beatles.”

[whatsitnot]

Hey @vulpeculavolans added a transcript to this AND THAT IS SO AWESOME THANK YOU SO MUCH!

[worstseawitch]

“I’m gonna stare at the wall and think my thoughts.” Is my true ADHD/Autism experience lmaoooo

[benevolentgentleman]

[thecw4kids]

ghost in the house: GET OUT. I WILL TAKE YOU-

real estate agent: chill, its me.

ghost: oh hey. have you sold it yet.

real estate agent: obviously NOT, idiot.

[bathetic]

u know when i was 12 i just kinda assumed the cullens' cover story worked bc a 23 year old is obviously an Adult and no one would question why or how he adopted like five kids between the ages of 17 and 20 but now that im in my 20s i have come to the conclusion that everyone in forks knows the cullens are vampires bc they all took one look at carlisle "i look like im fresh out of undergrad but im a doctor i swear" cullen and his gaggle of nearly-adult "children" and collectively called bullshit

[apathbacktoyou]

i just thought everyone was like "oh yikes a cult" and minded their business

cullens: we are a family but also date each other and our parents are barely older than us and we take collective hikes on school days and don't interact with people except this new kinda loner girl :)

forks:

[skippyv20]

[detective-dr-curious]

I love everything about every single one of these

[brucebocchi]

[huffylemon]

I don’t feel like posting today so

[ot3podcast]

We had some thoughts on the Batman Discourse

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

its proven that if the first vowel in your name is 'a' youre pretty & cute if its 'e' youre a slut whore if its 'o' youre stupid

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

we're gonna do ket together in this warehouse

[goodchristianmemes]

happy easter!!!