Becoming Me: J

This is a personal blog that will document my transition from female to male, as well as introduce myself to the world as J.

[jthegreydotcom]

I'm a fuck up and always will be.

[jthegreydotcom]

someone talk to me please

[jthegreydotcom]

Got the kiddo some fish and crabs!

[jthegreydotcom]

I've Already Made My Decision.

[jthegreydotcom]

Looking to Make Friends. Anyone..?

Message me.

[jthegreydotcom]

When They Think You're Clingy, But Really You're Literally Trying To Hold Onto Anything In This World Because Everything Inside You Wants To Disappear.

[jthegreydotcom]

Owning a Cat.

Hiro wakes me up often to tell me I need to: - Scoot over. - Give her scratches. - Let her in the covers. - Let her out of the covers. - Let me know my face is dirty, but not to worry, she's got it. - Say, "Hey, hooman, this is my butthole," whenever she feels as though I've forgotten what it looks like. - The dogs are out of water for her to play in. - The dogs are out of food for her to play in. - It's time to play. - She's awake, and I should be too. - "HOOMAN. BUTTHOLE. LOOK." - Cuddle, but only if I'm perfectly still, because any sign of movement makes me a target. - Pout because Dobby is winning their current wrestling match. - Try to wrestle me because she defeated Dobby. - "Hey, my butthole is still here." - Nip at my fingers because I've moved them out of hugging range before pulling them back into kitty hugging range. - Let me know how inconvenient it is that the bathroom door is shut, because she'd like to play in the toilet. - Let me know the bathroom door was open and she fell into the toilet. - "Hey. HEEEEEY. My butthole is still here. LOOK."

[jthegreydotcom]

Update: 1.3 Years on T

So, I just got my dosage upped. I'm hella ready for my next shot. Facial hair is filling in. I've lost 20lbs and gained quite a bit of muscle. I'm thinking about getting into parkour. I just want to do new things. Honestly, if I were single, I'd be living in a tent. Live however, save tons of money, camping ALL THE TIME. The life. Haha. Now for some Supernatural and relaxation. ~J

[jthegreydotcom]

I Generally Judge How Much Time Has Passed by How Soggy My Cereal Is.

[jthegreydotcom]

Hi there, just a little reminder that you are worth the whole universe, you are worth everything good in this world, look at the stars, you are worth every sun, every flower, you are amazing and you deserve to shine. You are so important in this world. And it's okay if the only thing you did today was breathing, it's enough, you are enough. You matter, keep going, you’re doing great <3 Sun is shining and so are you <3 (because the world needs more love )

Thank you! I just went up to the mountains, took some pictures, hiked, chilled. It was much needed. Just hit a low and had a mental breakdown.

[jthegreydotcom]

If you ever want to talk about anything you can always message me. I know it's sometimes easier to talk to a stranger. Thank you:)

Thank you. I'll definitely keep you in mind. I just want to be alone for a while, though. You know? Just breathe for a while.

[jthegreydotcom]

I'm So Close to Just Ending it.

I’m at the lowest low I’ve ever been at.

I keep thinking about ending it, tell myself “it’ll be okay. Just one more day.”

I hate it.

Every time I think about doing it, this ache washes through my being, like running a marathon without water. Your mouth is dry, your body aches and burns, you can practically feel its cold relief touching your very core. The thought of it literally makes me feel anticipation, and I could almost cry I want it so badly. I just want to be done with it.

But I don’t, because I need to believe that it will get better.

Just one more day.

[jthegreydotcom]

WHY CAN'T THIS BE ON A MEN'S SHIRT, BECAUSE BITCH, I'D WEAR IT.

[jthegreydotcom]

The fuck is this bull shit?

[jthegreydotcom]

I Need Friends.

For real, email buddies would be cool too. Just moved, so I get to make new friends. I figure, why not open that up to online pals too? Anyway, send an ask if you want my email, or whatever. =P

I would also like more people to play Destiny with on PlayStation. Same user if you want to add me on PSN.

[jthegreydotcom]

Update: 1 Year on T

So, it’s been a year. I can’t actually believe it. haha. It doesn’t seem like a year at all. I’m still working on the weight loss thing. Still working on school. Got promoted at work. Things are going really well, besides being broke. haha.

Still, a whole year. Well, I don’t have a luscious beard yet, but I. Will.

[jthegreydotcom]

Nearly Killed my Girlfriend.

I got home from work. Changed into PJ's. Made food. Flopped into bed. Girlfriend follows suit with cup of water and the last few bites of toast. Girlfriend then trips on her way to the bed. She looks down. I'm not sure if she wants to laugh, or cry. I assume she dropped her toast. Nope. Just tripped over my packing undies and packer. M: "I can't believe I just tripped over your dick." Me: "Bitches always be trippin' over something."