stardust and such

[juststardustt]

You shouldn't look at a moon mission and go, "waste of money, there's more important stuff."  There is more important stuff, but we shouldn't have to choose. That is the great lie. Go to space.

- Daniel Howell

[juststardustt]

In August I look for you like looking for shade on the beach.

[juststardustt]

One loved boldly.

One was a coward.

[juststardustt]

There's very few things I get immediately emotional about:

Geto and Gojo

Levi and Erwin

Dan and Phil

And Laika, the patron saint of one way trips.

[juststardustt]

I have yet to encounter someone worth getting over you for.

Oh well.

[juststardustt]

I wonder

who we could be

if we didn't structure our lives

around trying not to miss

each other

[juststardustt]

Today when I thought about him, a lyric popped into my head.

"Is he dark enough to see your light?"

And I the immediate no hit me like a blow to the chest. He's not.

You were though.

I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like I didn't see your light. It was the brightest star in my sky. I should have told you.

I should have told you.

[juststardustt]

It hits deeper when it's your birthday and it will be the first time in 13 years I dont wish you a happy one.

That's half my life. Half our lives.

Of course I wish you happiness. Nightly, I pray for your safety and that your steps are guided. I try and wish you the best from miles away when my heart breaks every time you barge into my memory. Of course. Of course.

Half my life. With nowhere else to go I will write it down. That will have to be enough. Writing it down always has to be enough these days. I love you. I miss you.

Happy Birthday, my love.

[juststardustt]

As a wife taken before her time regards her husband, i regard you. She watches as he clutches his hands and remembers the blood on them. He looks over his shoulder at whispers in the halls that sound like her laugh, the air he took from her lungs creeping on the back of his neck.

I will sit in the emptiness that follows you into rooms.

Watching with sorrow and longing.

Seeing you pass me by in confusion wondering what, my love, you could be looking for.

What are you looking for?

I'm no longer here. You made sure of it.

[juststardustt]

It's June and I'm still looking for you.

[juststardustt]

Being wanted but not chosen is a fate worse than death I think.

[juststardustt]

Profile views and story views and playlist lurking and there is only ever one thing to say to you about it.

I miss you, too.

[wt-nv-quotes]

Then on Sunday, Tacos and Gun safety with Three-eyed Bill at First Methodist.

[juststardustt]

I am afraid in small moments that im going to forget your voice. And then I think for a second and I can hear your laugh. I can hear your frustrated breaths when you were trying to figure things out or get June to do something. I can hear you call me baby and make the little noises at me when you were half asleep and clinging to me.

I don't know what's worse, forgetting your voice or only having it echo in my ribcage for the rest of my life.

I fucking miss you. You abandoned me and I fucking miss you.

[balo-badartist]

I really loved season 4! My fav part was Thragg ngl, I want to wife him up. I just wish our boy Mark could catch a break

[fortheartsofnone]

I think I held onto the thought of you

in the background

of everything I do

[strawlessandbraless]

Boys will be boys