hollow

These words are prisoners in my own mind

[jxsswrites]

I trace the heavens along your spine, And I taste the wine in your words. The light sparkles around you, And I realise I’m in love with a God. Your lips are soft and sweet, Whispering words that have the power to destroy And making me crave the feel of you. They say my love for you is unnatural, But the only unnatural thing is your beauty. A star has fallen from the heavens, How am I expected to resist? An Aphrodite is standing in my bedroom, Smiling at me as if I hung the moon. Laughing as if I hold the world. Kissing as if I own her heart. There’s no greater beauty than her eyes, No sweeter image than her blush, Her voice sings while she banishes my praises. A Queen doubting her crown. Your curls twirl in between my fingers, As you fade in and out of view. And I think of how my world is better with you in it. You make the pain tolerable. A woman loving a woman is wrong, But if you and I are wrong, I don’t want a right.

I am a Queen made to serve you // jxsswrites

...

When you start writing and it accidentally turns into an Evane poem…oops

[sixwordssayitall]

My secret, Short and sweet. My love for him will never match my love for you. He holds my hand and my mind wanders. Where are you? What are you doing? Are you thinking of me too? You’re my smile, The reason I laugh, The reason I cry. I’m drowning in a hollow world, The water rising faster than I can swim. But I will gladly drown in you, Even though you’ll be swimming far above. Because you’re there, You’re the person I trust, The person I love, And I can’t say a word. But you have her, She has your heart. She holds your dreams in her hands. And I have him. I die while he soars. I can’t tell him why. I can’t tell you why. So I sit here, Watching you love her. Watching you cry over her. Breaking my heart, With every word you speak. But it’s okay. Because you’re by my side. I may never hold you. I may never kiss you. But I watch you smile. I tell you I love you You say it back.. I mean it. So do you. That is enough. Even if it’s not the way I want you to say it.

I’m head over heals for my best friend // @jxsswrites (via sixwordssayitall)

[lifeinpoetry]

I, too have loved men who named my mouth ashtray, mistook me for a place to leave burning things when they were done.

Brenna Twohy, “What I Mean When I Say Survivor,” Forgive Me My Salt (via lifeinpoetry)

[hvxninhiding]

you are

A wave. Ocean water, Collapses over my head.

Dragged into the tide, I’m feeling the water run over me, As I float down, And find comfort as the sand swirls underneath my feet, And I sit for a moment at the bottom of the sea.

Your voice has pulled me under, But I don’t mind.

I am too mesmerized By the crystalline blue that surrounds me To realize You must be a siren.

Your sweet melodies tugs at my heartstrings As you beg me to stay with you At the bottom of the lake.

I am desperate for air, But you are too captivating.

Your serene smile is an enchantment, And I cannot see anything but you and me. And the beauty underneath the ocean that swirls around us.

Your hand runs through my hair, My fingertips intertwine with yours, And I realize Being lost at sea with you Is much better Than being lost on the land.

[ for @drearydaffodil​ - i hope you don’t mind this being slightly late but i hope you had a lovely valentine’s day!! ]

[ @poeticstories​ valentine’s exchange present ]

[jxsswrites]

Forever wasn't long enough for you.

Six Word Story // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

Kiss me underneath the stars While the world is fast asleep. When the sun rises, Rips form in our lives And you're torn from my grasp. They can try to ruin our memories, And they can rip apart our dreams. But it can't take you from me.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

We are the darkness. Two shadows reaching out, destined to touch, yet so far apart.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

He didn't feel the same anymore,

Six Word Story // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

A broken heart may heal, but it will never forget. There will always be an echo, a scar that you once carved out of me. There is no forgiving that.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

She was born to bow under her father, as his eyes raked her body in a way that made her skin crawl. She was raised to bow to her mother, to be a good girl and do as she's told. But now, with her lover by her side, she was finally free. And she would bow to no one.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

I was so busy chasing tomorrow, that by the time I realized I'd never reach it, a million yesterdays had passed.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

When I was little, I was obsessed with superstitions. I used to walk slower than everyone else because I was always looking down. I’d never once step on a crack, I’d even step over the lines from tiles on the school floor. I ran away from every ladder that I saw, and black cats creeped me out And I never EVER Broke a mirror. But I didn’t really know why someone would. To me, a mirror was something I made faces into, My mom and grandma used them for makeup, And they would sit me in front of one when they pulled my hair back into a ballerina bun. I always wondered why Why would someone want to break a mirror? One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, The first time I wanted to break a mirror I was in seventh grade. I was sitting in the bathroom with two friends, Friends I haven’t talked to in years. I couldn’t breathe through all the tears that were falling, I couldn’t breathe after the words they had called me. It was taunting me, I could hear it laughing at my bloodshot eyes. I wanted to smash it, To make it feel the pain I was feeling, To make the hurt in my heart jump into the real world. My mother came to pick me up since I said I had a stomach ache. She didn’t question my puffy eyes, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, The next time I was at home, and I hated myself for that. I had been staring into the mirror for hours, putting on makeup and taking it off again. I could hear the mirror jear each time I saw a flaw A single imperfection on a girl made of nothing but. It was like I was being stabbed, Like my heart was on fire. I stayed home that day. The mirror won. Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, I needed a knife, Or at least something sharp enough to cut. There was a pool party and I was not going to be the butt of the jokes. I refused to hear their whispers. I couldn’t get rid of it naturally, so maybe with a knife… I wanted to smash the mirror, To use it’s shards to cut out the fat that the other girls didn’t have, To make myself look normal. To make myself look pretty. I gave in and wore a one piece. Four, Five, Six, Seven, I couldn’t breathe. I was supposed to be in class writing a test, but I was in the bathroom instead Listening to the gossip, Staring into my bloodshot eyes. I wanted to go home. I wanted to get out. I was just a kid and I was so fucking scared. I made the mistake in saying that aloud. They sent me to the principal's office with laughter. Five, Six, Seven, It was a mess. I never should have liked him, I never should have kissed him. I just wanted out, Out of his text messages, Out of his forced planing, Out of the life where it seemed like I was nothing more than an entertainment piece in his games. This time, the mirror had his voice. It laughed while I cried all night long. Six, Seven, I was a skeleton. I could trace my bones like carvings. I looked in the mirror and I wasn’t me. I wasn’t human. For a moment, I was a monster. I was a skeleton wearing someone else’s skin. My ribs were protruding out Like a creature trying to escape from my chest. I wanted to cut it out, To smash the mirror and free what was trapped inside me. Because maybe then nothing would be attacking me from the inside. Maybe then I would actually be myself. Maybe then the mirror would stop haunting me. Seven, Seven years, Seven years of bad luck. You smash a mirror and that’s what you get, Trapped in a hell because of your carelessness. But I never broke a mirror, I never traced the spiderweb fractures with my hand and imagined they were my soul. And seven years was a lie, Because I’m almost eighteen and my luck has not changed once, So someone please explain, Explain why this bad luck has been thrust against me. Because I never broke a mirror, But I have wanted to, And maybe that’s worse. Maybe it’s worse to want something so much and refuse yourself of it. Maybe it’s worse to deprive yourself of hope. In doing so, you break a piece of yourself. And maybe that’s worth a bit more than seven years.

Seven years // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

I traded my crown of flowers for one of bones, and I had never felt more happy.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

I am more than a mistake, more than a trophy you won with your games. I am more than what you made me feel like. I will not be kept down any longer.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

The battles we fight are tough, but our minds are much worse.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

I miss you so much, But I can't forgive the sins you have done, The pain you have caused me. I used to be happy, A fairytale in my own mind, But you broke me into pieces. You made me a victim, But I'm so much stronger than I used to be. I do still love you, But I love me more.

I’m still learning // jxsswrites

[jxsswrites]

People call it destiny, but it's anything but. In a million ways, a million plans, a million lives, we never were supposed to meet. But I tell destiny to fuck itself, because we did meet, and now I can't imagine any of those lives without you by my side.

Excerpt from a story i’ll never write // jxsswrites