Kafkaesque Queen

Eclectic witchery 

[maciejslaski]

[memewhore]

[queeringfeministreality]

SO PURE 😭😭

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

The pure joy on his face at Pope Baby though

Look at him

this has made his day :D

[starsforscales]

What gets me is Mr. Serious in the last picture, pushing the stroller.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

He is Pope Baby’s bodyguard :D

[mrcheyl]

[jehovahhthickness]

How I want my bank account to look like by 25.

[amemoryofkaye]

Claiming it.

[clatchetuniversity]

Waaaaay up 🙏🏾

[muvadiam]

11:11am on the receipt.

[amethystafrodite]

Reblog for prosperity, and success. May you always have what you need.

[honeychaigoddess]

That’s what I’m saying

[stanleighhh]

In other words, this is the ATM receipt, reblog and money will come your way.

[frankpagmanua-deactivated201712]

Doesn’t hurt to try.

[geeenohh]

^

[blkspice]

I turn 25 next month. Omg gimme money!!

[markantonys]

coruscant nine nine [47/?]

[101katten-deactivated20191203]

[cglmrfreeman]

omg the tag isn’t even off the bed yet! ;w;

[zzazu]

This cat looks and sounds like a very very tiny mountain lion

[lifecrystals]

CAN WE TALK ABOUT ITS LITTLE TONGUE STICKING OUT

[drtanner]

I will never not reblog this happy baby.

[black--lamb-blog]

THIS IS OFFICIALLY MY FAVORITE VIDEO ONLINE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😍😍😍 LOOK AT THIS BABY!

[black--lamb-blog]

I’ve watched this 10 times

[moseby]

the best fruits are hardest to open

[trashboat]

this fucking bowling ball is gonna be delicious i know it

[alterac]

last night i had a dream that i met mother earth and if u were wondering what she looks like it’s dwayne the rock johnson in a flowy white sun dress with rly good winged eyeliner 

[alterac]

reblogging myself bc it was like the most serene dream ever and when i’m stressed i think about it and i think everyone should too

[knockfivetimes]

you mean like this

[dajo42]

a muggleborn student coming to hogwarts with a thermos flask and filling it with tea in the morning so it stays hot all day and their pureblood friends are like “whoa what spell did you use for that” and they’re like “?????? it’s just a thermos???” and all the pureblood students start pointing their wands at cups and saying “THERMOS”

[colorfuloddity]

THERMOS

[athenavine]

plot twist: it works, mugs suddenly start keeping tea at the perfect temperature for the caster all day. students in muggle studies start experimenting with other muggle jargon and a new generation of magic spells are born, propelling the stagnated wizard community into the technological age

[animmalcrossing]

last year a boy walked into my class 20 minutes late and really high and my teacher asked him why he was so late and he said “i don’t know i think there were more stairs than usual”

[racetrak]

Getting friends in to musicals is hard because when they ask what it’s about you have to be like “15 year olds having sex” or “a plant from outer space that takes over the world” or “teenagers killing people for fun” or “Alexander Hamilton”

[thisarenotarealblog]

“7 minorities deal with crushing poverty and the looming specter of death by being a dick to their landlord”

[levianity]

“Sesame Street, but like… for adults”

[beggars-opera]

“This one time in the 1830s a bunch of college students decided to fight the entire French government and…it didn’t go very well.”

[notsuchasecret]

“Argentinian gold digger teaches her country the joys of fascism.”

[objectiverodeo]

“Disfigured guy in the friendzone thinks his student owes him a relationship for teaching her how to sing.”

[housetohalf]

“Woman who sucks at being a nun becomes a homewrecker, flees from the Nazis with new family.”

[titleleaf]

“presidential assassins” 

[shredsandpatches]

“The ridiculously complicated love lives of anthropomorphic trains.”

[gehayi]

The Newsboys’ Strike of 1899.

[chonquee-monquee]

The secret life of cats

[wildishmazz]

A factory that makes shoes, for drag queens.

[the-last-teabender]

A dance audition where whoever has the best childhood trauma story gets a speaking role.

[comradesmooches-deactivated2021]

Organ repossession

[agnostic-nemesis]

Jesus’ Crucifixion, set to funky rock

[misskittyfantastico]

The first two Evil Dead movies condensed into one coherent plot and you’re the one who gets sprayed in blood.

[abnormal-as-expected]

So there are these monks…

[silhouetteofagirl]

So these two guys are writing a musical and get two of their friends to take part in it…

[optimysticals]

Ok, so like everything above, and a lot of Shakespeare jokes, mashed together.

[barefootdramaturg]

Hey kids, let’s put on a show in a barn

[porcupine-girl]

All the people who have ever tried to kill a President of the United States hanging out together.

[unforth-ninawaters-deactivated2]

Somehow a love triangle is more important than the entire French Revolution.

[bookshop]

A hard-boiled crime novelist invents a really incompetent detective and then they yell at each other

Teen girl in the Wild West shoots lots of guns

Class differences in the colonial Caribbean leads to a girl turning into a tree

[popculturebrain]

Jesus and friends set to lighter funky rock

[official-daft-punk-deactivated2]

ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

[mogifire]

mhm if you could have job skillz… that would be great

[monica-geller]

i don’t know how anyone could possibly risk plagiarising on purpose like i am so god damn terrified of accidental plagiarism that every time i submit something on turnitin i can literally feel my individual arm hairs standing on end as i wait for the police to show up at my door and arrest me for writing a string of words too similar to some paper about the mating habits of hoot owls from 1965 

[kamonra]

This is the money pentacle. Reblog and unexpected money will come to you!

[emeraldwitch-blog1]

gods know i need it

[tarot-sybarite]

NEED NEW WINDOWS ON MY HOUSE, PLEASE!

[wicca-wicca-ahh]

I got a job. Let’s just hope I keep it.

[horrorphil1-deactivated20160802]

[threebigolsausages-deactivated2]

Spooning is out, spatulaing is the next big trend. Slide up behind your partner and then launch them out of bed

[prettynerdieworks]

[can-i-tap-it-for-mana-deactivat]

This made me ugly laugh