Have you ever felt the need to think about your gender identity or sexuality? Or have you always been comfortable with yourself?
Looking inwards in general is something I don't do unprompted. I exist in the world and that certainly means something to the people in my life, but I never felt like I have any responsibility over their impressions of me. I do have an annoyingly recurring tendency to being liked by people I don't respect in the slightest, which maybe could have been avoided if I cared more about controlling my image (or being a more openly confrontational person, I guess), but it sounds like too much (and too constant) extra work and I have much better things to do with my very limited time.
As for my relationship with gender, I don't think I can be anything other than cis because that requires having solid personal definitions of what masculinity and femininity are.
I was raised under house rules where everything I owned was also my sister's and everything she owned was also mine. Sure, our differences in age and gender gave us very different friend groups in school and consequently very different interests, but we did grow up encouraged to play with each other, freely using each other's toys, so the divide between what a boy can do and what a girl can was pretty non-existent. Some kids around me had strict ideas of masculinity but that was too alien to my home situation for me to be able to take them seriously. It all felt silly, arbitrary, and dumb to child me.
On a very similar note, my mother also tried to enforce some strict standards for a gentleman's behavior, but that was so incompatible with my father's conduct that I quickly could tell it was not that serious, and grew up following my father's example of not giving her arbitrary gender ideas genuine attention.
Living in the current culture turned gender into something I'm capable of earnestly examining and discussing, but my upbringing really grounds me centrally on the thought that the definitions of masculinity and femininity are very arbitrary, and not personally relevant to my experiences, so every engagement starts and ends with an attempt to figure out the other side's definitions. I feel like this "outsider" outlook certainly helps navigate conversations easier than people have personal stakes and opinions on these topics, but conversely, I'm not gaining anything from being in these discussions.
And ultimately, that's perfectly fine with my lack of investment here. Accepting you don't have a opinion on something is always better, both for yourself and for the communities of people with genuine opinions, than forcing yourself to have something to say in something that is just not intuitive to you. I do try to be a listener that understands the language of my trans friends, but I'm under no delusion that I'll ever going to be the guy who has pertinent comments to make.
