Cantankerous Rumperus

My name is Kalei. And I like cake. 22, INFP, Aquarius, a nobody.

[kingofthehillcaps]

[discreet45]

[bloodmancerr-deactivated]

i never want context

[curlicuecal]

Oh my god, they sprang this on us in our old church years ago, and my family has never let this joke die.

Okay, here’s the stupid gender essentialist metaphor:

Women are like spaghetti because their thoughts noodle all over the place. Men are like waffles because there thoughts are in boxes. Men aren’t bad listeners, they just can’t keep up with a conversation when women are noodling topics so fast and they have to keep switching boxes. Also, when a woman asks a man what he’s thinking and he says “nothing” women just don’t understand that some of a man’s boxes literally have nothing in them, haha!

….. :|

Anyway, if you think me and my brothers and my mom don’t constantly give each other sad, tragic faces and say “I’m sorry, my waffle box is empty today” and “noodle faster!” and “you are failing at being a waffle” and “I can’t be clearer, I am a plate of spaghetti” pretty much indiscriminately in all directions all the time…. you would be wrong.

[kyraneko]

Occasionally the context of a Dadaist post makes it even better.

[anxious-but-whatever-deactivate]

Whatthehickityheck

[juliettecousin]

New illustration to practice color palettes

[connerys]

Love in the Afternoon (1957) dir. Billy Wilder

[teknicolour]

Let your eyes sparkle and shine, never a tear, baby of mine.

[harlequinex]

[serpentwife-deactivated20200820]

why are we still here? just to suffer? every day i get emails

[gothicprep]

no offense but I’ve never gotten over anything that’s happened to me in my life

[vladtheunfollower]

het dating articles are just: how to hack men into treating you like a person

[licensehaver-deactivated2025061]

*sees one cop drive by* damn. way too many cops out today

[avvocarlo]

showerthoughtsofficial: uhhhhhhh driving a car is like playing a racing game in the first person woahhhh 😮

[hyumjim]

Me: you have a soft kitty tumby….

Cat: PLEASE… PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE… SINCE THE ACCURSED DAY I MET YOU MY LIFE HAS NOT KNOWN PEACE….

[thatautisticadhdfeel]

Just found: my sweater analogy of doing school when you have executive dysfunction

[a-yoda-a-day]

imagine being so bad at moderating your own website you decide to just kill half the user base and not fix any of the actual problems

[raptortooth]

Isn’t this the plot of Infinity War

[somewhereinjersey]

[neurodivergentaf]

*gets an old trauma memory back* sweet. bonus backstory unlocked 

[thatsbelievable]

[spitblaze]

Its 2019 and we have colored text, why arent we highlighting random nouns to make our text look like video game dialogue? If we aren’t pretending to be NPCs we aren’t truly living.

[oppositionresearch]

Remember to use your highlighted text to indicate important gameplay elements to the player. This should take the form of random nouns and verbs.

Now you try! Add content to this post.

[corvuscricket-deactivated202411]

My crops have withered, won’t you help me?

[yes] [no]

Oh, thank you! I need you to kill God.