Aimless Wanderings

I like a little bit of everything. she/her 30

[beskarprincessjenny]

[raylangivins]

my dealer: got some straight gas. this strain is called “daylight savings time” youll be zonked out of your gourd

Me: yeah whatever. i dont feel shit.

1 hour and 5 minutes later: dude I swear it’s only been 5 minutes

my friend the oven, pacing: the smart devices are lying to us

[shiny-rhydon]

yeah sure i'll reblog that

[elumish]

I honestly think Gen-Z and younger simply does not understand how recent widespread smartphone adoption is.

I am not that old, and I didn't have a smartphone until probably late high school. For most of my life, many if not most people were not walking around with a magic internet machine in their pocket that they pulled out and used constantly for everything.

[sandumilfshous]

reblog if you remember having to ration your text messages and accidentally opening the internet on your phone was the end of the world

[homunculus-argument]

Okay just in case there's people on tumblr who were too little in 2016 to actually remember it yourself, I cannot stress enough that the clown sightings were a thing. That's not a bit that people just made up like pretending that people in camo are invisible. This is a real tweet from the time:

[depsidase]

[dungeonmastersdiary]

[alexaloraetheris]

We used paper cutouts glued to toothpicks and stabbed into erasers, but I like this idea better.

[inbabylontheywept]

For a college game, I used an entire box of candy canes as a size colossal monstrous zombie grasshopper, and then when it died I ripped the box open and used the candy canes as size large monstrous parasitic horsehair worms erupting from its corpse. Nobody actually wanted to eat them after that so I took them home and ground them into a powder with a pestle, intending to add it to my hot cocoas. But I didn’t wash the pestle very well last time after using it to crush garlic and chilis, so I accidentally made chili-garlic-mint powder and then I tried serving that cocoa at a later D&D sesh, and we were all baffled at why it tasted so horrible until I was like oh my god it’s the ground up zombie ass worms. I contaminated them with garlic and chilis. And the group was like YOU GROUND UP THE ZOMBIE ASS WORMS AND FED THEM TO US which seemed like a lot of fuss over what would have otherwise been free and delicious cocoa. Then after that before taking any snacks they’d ask did you perchance put any zombie ass chili-garlic worm powder in this?, and then refuse to eat until I said None.

Which they thought was very funny, even if I was slightly less amused, but I bided my time until they got tired of the joke and stopped specifically asking. Then I poured all the remaining zombie ass chili-garlic worm powder into a bag of party mix. The first guy to take a bite spluttered, and I laughed, and everyone said WHAT DID BABS DO, and I said THE WOOOORMS… YOU FORGOT TO ASK… OHMYGOD… and then I laughed so hard I actually cried. Derailed the start time almost an hour.

Oh that was a wonderful day.

[bonetrader]

A good, a neutral, and an evil DM. In this order.

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[daysleftofsecondterm]

1,070 days left

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

this is, as the kids say, frying me (a glasses wearer)

[kiwikiwikiwiii]

[liberalsarecool]

Unquenchable greed is killing us all.

[headspace-hotel]

it is so fucking sad to find a cool fanartist on here and then see that their last post was from like 2018 and they were announcing that they were moving to Twitter.

It's like being a space colonist and finding a little abandoned space cottage and there's a diary in it and the last entry is like "i have now gone to seek a better life on [name of planet that got overtaken by axe-wielding octopi that feed on human blood]"

[asthedeathoflight]

Resisting the urge to Um Actually this dragon novel because it has the dragon eggs be like three or four feet wide but there is simply a limit to how large hard-shelled terrestrial eggs can be. No matter how large the animal is, the embryo needs oxygen, and oxygen needs surface area. The larger an object is, the lower its surface area relative to volume, and the less oxygen the embryo can receive. We think of large animals as having porportionately large young because mammalian pregnancy has the unique benefit of allowing for the size of the young to scale with the adult because their oxygen is provided directly through the placenta, and almost all the megafauna remaining on Earth are mammals. But this is not the case for species which lay eggs! For fuck's sake even the sauropods hatched out of eggs barely larger than basketballs! Your hatchling dragon would be impressively enormous if it were the size of a house cat. Stop trying to make me believe that this (ROUND!) dragon egg somehow supplied enough oxygen to develop an infant the size of a large dog or even bigger. If it were possible the dinosaurs woulda been doing it!!!!

[achillbeing]

I love you /lh. Experts going off on their particular fascinating cool topics and adding unexpected context to things we take for granted is like my favorite thing this was delightful. Talk to me more about eggs and geometry and biology all you want :D

[achillbeing]

Amazing concept

[anxietyproblem]

[aralintheobsessive]

if you want butterflies, you need to live with caterpillars.

i am not being metaphorical, i work in a garden center, stop buying plants 'to bring in the bees and butterflies' and then immediately poisoning every caterpillar that dares to consume a single leaf

you will not get butterflies if you kill all the things that turn into butterflies! what are you doing!

[bisforbutch]

As a poet, I also want my viewers to take this rather beautiful allegory into account.

[jaaneymann]

so almost all of the wuthering heights reviews are like this

[raychleadele]

I watched the new Muppet Show special last night. I actually teared up a little when Kermit closed the show with “Don’t Stop Me Now.”

The whole backstage plot was about how they had more acts ready than they had time to show. So to end the show like this, with dozens of acts waiting in the wings hoping for a chance to go on stage, the song felt like a very real plea from the performers. Like they were saying, “Please don’t let this be a one off. We have so much more to give. We’re having a good time, and we don’t want to stop at all.”

I sincerely hope the Muppet team gets what it needs to keep this going. I hope this is the beginning of a real, sustained Muppet revival. I want to be able to tune in to The Muppet Show on a weekly basis. I want the show to come back and continue for years. They deserve it.

[gardenspells]

just a friendly reminder that this blog hates ICE