Kartoffels Gehirn @kartofflesbrain - Tumblr Blog

My preferred method of ragebaiting is taking a cute terran girl out for a wine and dine, telling her I'm gonna make her wet tonight, and then taking her home to give her a bath and look at her confused when she seems disappointed.

ihavetroubletalkingbcimaquatic

in class and shit

maidthings

"this is unbecoming of me" is genuinely a useful thing to have in your mental toolbox

fake-lancelot

shebangasylum

-_- Why must relativity interfere with my yearning for ownership

The Galactic Core is 27,000 light years away at most from Sol.

If I act on my plan to hack into the control systems of the Parkes Radio Telescope in New South Wales (trivial to do given my university offers astronomy students in a specific unit remote access to the array for practicals, and given that I know my university’s internal network like the back of my hand) and broadcast a half hour long audio recording of me begging the Affini to come domesticate me already, it will not be actionable for 27,000 years, assuming the message does not degrade over that time, and not accounting for gravitational interference by black holes or other large masses.

Fucking Einstein, he’s cockblocking me from beyond the grave.

helenamite

I like to imagine Qaxi as this gentle loving pred outside of heat months. Normally she's resistant to it but compliment her enough and ask enough and she'll get shy and hesitate but in the end eat you if you really want...

She's very gentle though, she has the prey sit on a counter of sorts so they can take it at their own pace. Letting them slip one leg down her gullet at a time just to get a feel for it... they feel the saliva coating their extremities as they enter, seeing their lower legs disappearing down the fleshy tunnel while they sit outside on a chair or table or counter....

then they scooch forward and Qaxi gently holds their waist and guides them ever so carefully to avoid scraping on her fangs or sharp teeth..

the prey putting their arms to their sides so they slip down easier, feeling their hands get sticky from all the fluids surrounding them to lubricate their descent into Q's maw. and then once the lower arms finally sink into the gullet they lost their freedom of movement, being constrained by Her throat, and then Qaxi Stands fully up, looks upward, and lets gravity pull the rest of the prey down. then when its just the prey's head sticking out of her gullet, she tries to gulp in some oxygen before finally closing her jaws and swallowing down the last of the prey...

her stomach would open up to greet them and the prey would slide nicely down into it, settling into a comfy crescent-pose, partially submerged in saliva, where they will sit and stew and feel the warmth of her body combined with a pleasant feeling induced by secreted pheromones...

Outside of heat she's very gentle and makes sure to pose herself so that the person in her belly doesn't have to worry about choking on her stomach fluid, gently rubbing the prey through her belly (and then after an hour or so of relaxing, she uses her hands to push on her gut while leaning over a soft surface with towels to keep the area dry to push the prey out of her stomach and heave them up onto the surface... then she may even offer to help shower off the prey and do some aftercare to make sure they're all clean)

when she's not under the influence of hormonal changes during heat, she's very very kind and considerate ESPECIALLY of the prey in her belly, she has been told the experience is extremely therapeutic due to the pheromones inducing a feeling of comfort along with the warmth and the fluid being like a hot tub... I kind of bounce between liking sadistic evil vore with helena and the kind, therapeutic vore qaxi is willing to do if she is convinced enough.

maxdunbar

To celebrate Critical Role Campaign 2 episode 100, one of my favorite moments so far. Fjord facing down the Laughing Hand.

queerwhohdg

harborbasehdg

Hmm…

What?

Oh nothing just… the Affini seen kinda eldritch dontcha think?

I mean… that’s kinda the point right?

No I mean like in a thematic parallel kinda thing!

I… don’t get it.

Well like in the old stories about a patron god who promises prosperity to the people of a kingdom in return for a human sacrifice?

… shut up and keep making out with me ya starsdamned floret!~

I’m not a Flo-mmph! *muffled words followed by kissy noises*

esfera-nyah

stole this from my friend on discord :p don't know if it's been done before

pollypoirate

hdg-shitposts

I am the lorax I speak for the trees

And for some fucking reason the trees are flirting with me

6uny

twitter commission!

ace-disgrace-on-the-case

@fleshengine

fleshengine

I <3 glyphid dreadnought girl

indie-pro-tips

INDIE PRO TIP: bottling up your emotions can be a serious problem. nowadays, you can talk to a therapist of the leaf-y or people-y variety, and generally trust that they've got your interests at heart. despite the impression I may give, I'm willing to admit it: sometimes the affini aren't out to get you.

even if that's not the case, it's my understanding that past a certain level of depression, literally anything else is better than still laying down on the floor and waiting to just rot away.

and I ain't even gonna lie to you, gang. it's no biggie if you have to find a nice, quiet (or not so quiet) place out in the middle of nowhere to scream into the void for a bit. screeching banshee-like in the tempest is good for the soul, every once in a while.