i'm a human shit post

puppy wrangler, journalist and trash queen. Follow the other blogs for earnest moments ^ this blog is bad and i should feel bad. (i do.)

[charl0ttan]

huge fan of the depth of a good purple but another area that draws me is definitely around aquamarine/turquoise/seafoam. you can not go wrong once the green starts getting just a tinge more blue. a gal could certainly do worse than to pull over there and stay a while

[charl0ttan]

something earth shattering going on here

[emily84]

this is why one of my favorite all-time paintings is Ship in Stormy Seas by Ivan Aivazovsky... he was really onto something there

a close up to just... light shining through those waves, makes me feel faint with exhilaration every time

[is-there-a-boat]

THERE IS A BOAT BY IVAN AIVAZOVSKY!!

[clayandsorcery]

Ivan Aivazovsky could paint glowing water. One of the GOATs for sure.

[deboracabral]

I think about this meme every single day

[astraldemise]

when i die i want to be a goat when i come back i want to look like some wouldst thou like to live deliciously bitch i want some cunt driving by my field to see me and think to themselves that thats a bad omen right there

[astraldemise]

why am i not this

[astraldemise]

i need to hide my phone after taking my sleeping pills otherwise i start posting about wanting to look like baphomet or some shit

[luvlaff]

[electronic-old-men]

Lost in the sauce

[textonly]

[tripnipalex-deactivated20210125]

As a former catholic I can tell you the accuracy of these statements is spot fucking on

[filmaticbby]

Why don't you watch riverdale????

[walkingheads-deactivated2025122]

[theycantalk]

directions

[cryptid-sighting]

comics then: funny cat loves lasagna and hates mondays comics now: pigeon experiences a micro-aggression

[talkgentlytome]

Tag yourself I’m the “Overdressed and Underappreciated”. Artist : http://www.mattadrian.com/ 

[lawful-evil-novelist]

This is the same guy that does the guide to troubled birds.

[lesbianrey]

You are already rotting

this is THE funniest and scariest ask i’ve ever received thank you

[cyelatm]

[skylikethat]

James Dean and Paul Newman’s incredibly iconic sexual tension filled screen test for East of Eden.

[deactivated-1234-4321]

All these ugly straight people laugh when I tell them James Dean was queer 💅🏼

[smatter-deactivated20220909]

I can’t believe this is the first Sean Cody video ever

[ashleyisaboysnametoo]

Wowzers

[entropvy]

baby: *incomprehensible babbling*

me: WHAT!? really??? no way :0

[thelibrarina]

This is actually really good for babies’ brain development. You’re laying the groundwork for conversation, teaching them through example that people take turns talking and listening.

Did you know that babies from affluent families hear an average of thirty MILLION more words before age 5 than babies in families below the poverty line? For context, Les Miserables is about 650,000 words and it looks like this:

So it’s like reading this book 46 times.* And that’s not the total number of spoken words, that’s the GAP between affluent and poor babies. And these are the years in which the brain undergoes the most development. It’s mind-boggling.

So what I’m saying is: keep doing the thing. Do it to all babies, all the time. Narrate your day. Ask them for opinions. (“Should we buy the large bag of potatoes or the small bag?” “Gaabooglagje.” “Yes, just as I thought.”) Point out colors and shapes and letters. Let them scribble outside the lines and treat their babble like talk. Sing them nursery rhymes and Raffi songs and songs from the radio. All of these things are going to build their brains to prepare them for kindergarten and beyond.

*Please do not read Les Mis 46 times to an infant. They don’t even care about the Parisian sewer system.

[hale-to-the-gay]

That last part though

[pleasestopandrew]

When you get IT on bootleg

[froggingmolly]

[judedoyle]

Magic and Mentions

Well: The baby and I survived our first run-in with the Chapos. 

I kept my pregnancy secret from the Internet – not a very well-guarded secret, granted; my friends knew, my co-workers knew, the people who attended the multiple readings and shows where I was hugely, visibly pregnant on stage knew; hell, I did things like Tweet about my iron-deficiency anemia and post “just wondering” polls about baby names, so I’m pretty sure a ton of my followers knew – for several reasons. 

One was pure superstition. Thirty-four is relatively late in the game for a surprise pregnancy. Her father and I weren’t exactly trying to avoid a baby, but I figured that at my age, we’d actually have to plan one. Instead, we followed time-honored Irish Catholic tradition, in that we got married and I was somehow knocked up within five minutes of leaving the reception hall. For Lulu to just happen, after all this time, and for her to be healthy on top of everything else, felt unreal. Every time we went to get an ultrasound, I’d be possessed by this sudden, irrational fear that the doctors wouldn’t find anything. They’d have to tell me it was all a misunderstanding, I wasn’t actually pregnant, the previous tests were all false positives, this almost never happens, it really did look like a baby last time we did this, so sorry for the mistake. I mean, I was worried about that in the third trimester, when I could feel her skinny little back thumping against my abdomen every time I moved. Lulu felt like magic to me, and magic is delicate. So I didn’t brag about my pregnancy. I didn’t want her to turn back into a pumpkin when I wasn’t looking. 

But the other reason to stay quiet, the more practical reason, is just that I attract a whole lot of Internet creeps, and I’ve attracted a record number of them in the past two years.

Keep reading

[lospaziobianco]

The Fairly OddParents: Channel Chasers

[black-riverkiller-deactivated20]

Best idea ever