Everyone says that the Jedi policy against attachments is misunderstood, but given what happened to Anakin isn't it fair to say that their policies are bad?
Listen to what Yoda says to Anakin in Revenge of the Sith, and pay attention to the important words.
"The fear of loss is a path to the Dark Side. Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them, do not. Miss them, do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed, that is."
The Jedi aren't forbidden from loving others, but they have to love others selflessly.
Anakin's problem is that his love for Padme was possessive. He didn't love her, he coveted her. He was completely consumed by the fear of losing her. This is why he strangles her when he thinks she's betrayed him, because whether by death or divorce, he is losing her at that very moment.
He is so consumed by his greed that he destroys everything Padme ever cared about or was passionate about just to keep her from dying, even though Padme would have given her life to preserve the Republic.
Padme's happiness is secondary to keeping her around. This is why Yoda warns Anakin about mourning or missing someone, because these are actions fundamentally centered around the dead no longer being around, and you no longer have access to them.
Anakin loves Padme the way Ashley loves Andrew.
This is how a lot of people experience love. This is why some people get depressed, bitter and angry when they have unrequited feelings, because their love is fundamentally oriented around "having" someone, like a possession.
The shadow of greed, that is.
This is what Yoda is trying to tell him. That whoever Anakin is afraid of losing, his love for them is being poisoned by his greed. A greed so all consuming that he ignored and disregards every value Padme ever had all in the name of keeping her alive.
The only thing there is to say to him is "This is not a healthy or good way to view other people. You have to let go of this desire to own others or you will continue to rot from this irrational fear."
Here's something to always keep in mind: Policies like this are implemented for good reasons, and they can also change for equally good reasons. Good policy doesn't last forever and it's not supposed to.


















