I Physically Cannot Even

|Logan|28|Artist|Gamer|GauntPaladin4

[hawberries]

they are like. BEST friends

[999aethers]

Ponytail Aether!

[canardette]

July🌊 and August☄ works from my illustration fanbook “A year at Dawn Winery”.

[leisomnium]

graffiti 🌱🐉

[dragonbleps]

survived checking my bank account. i deserve a little treat

[dragonbleps]

this had better not alter the Numbers in my bank account

[dragonbleps]

by Talos this can't be happening

[samijen]

🍡🧋 ThomaTo

[cisthoughtcrime]

[aureateplinko]

Holy fucking shit y'all.

[kenziecore]

ok but

[crystal-rebellion]

Have some samples from the comments - 10/10 would recommend browsing them.

[pyreo]

are there actually new tumblr users or are we just memeing ourselves into a fever dream where this site is popular again like two hundred thousand people hallucinating as they die in a trench

[sarahseeandersen]

[animauxing]

I sell seashells on your seashore.

[see more comics] [slide me a $3 tip] [SHOP]

[depsidase]

[marauders4evr]

It occurs to me that there are people who weren’t on this website in 2012 and therefore never saw the magical gif that you can actually hear:

It’s been over five years and that still impresses the hell out of me.

[galwaygremlin]

wdym you can hear it?

[superpaperclip]

Basically, it’s a form of synesthesia, movement-hearing. In this case, you expect to hear a thud, so you do. It’s estimated that 20% of people experience this type of synesthesia, as opposed to 2-4% for other kinds.

[eat-the-door-to-the-v0id-deacti]

YO what the FUXK

[arishok-s]

Cicero unprovoked when you're sneaking through a draugr infested crypt

[helila]

[aeschylus-stan-account]

Today in Amusing Middle English, I came across an adjective meaning “noble” or “lovely” or “beautiful”. It can also mean, in various contexts, “graceful,” “lush,” “splendid,” “mirthful,” or “majestic”.

The adjective in question is “wlonk”.

[movedineedthename-deactivated20]

don’t you dare hide this in the tags

[love2bfit]

I love this.

[sandersstudies]

I realize this comment will have niche relatability but when I’m taking drive-thru orders I often “trick” customers into thinking I’m going fast when I’m actually going slow, then they pull up to the window all happy and surprised when their drink is ~*~*~Already Ready For Them~*~*~. It is a neat little magic trick where people see their time at the box as active and their time at the window as passive.

[sandersstudies]

Example: Two 1-minute interactions. I have this down to a SCIENCE.

1. Car pulls up. Seconds 1-15, barista says “what can I get started for you?” customer says, “a large white mocha, please.” barista says “okay, you can pull forward.” At second 10 or later, bar barista begins to make drink, customer is at window less than ten seconds later, drink takes at least 30 seconds to make even with a skilled barista. 10 more seconds for drink to be handed from bar to DTO, sleeved, handed to DTR, and handed to customer. (That accounts for our 60 seconds, about 30 of which customer was waiting at window.)

2. MY MAGIC METHOD. Car pulls up, I take longer to greet them if my bar baristas already have a lot of drinks. Full greeting might be like “It is a beautiful morning here at Starbucks, my name is Study, what delicious items can I get started for you today?” 10 seconds. Customer usually replies to friendly greeting with “oh, good morning!” or “Good morning, how are you Study?” These precious extra seconds mean other drinks are going out and my baristas are ready by the time the customer says “a large white mocha, please.” Maybe we are at second 20 at the time they start making the drink. I take my time to say “okay great [insert name if I know it], a venti white mocha for you today, very good choice. And you wanted the drink hot today, as well?” “Yes, please.” “Fantabulous, any food items or other drinks I can get started for you? [insert special promotion if there is one]” “Hmmmm….. no thanks, I think I’m good.” “Alrighty, so if that completes the order then it looks like your total is going to be $5.75 and I will see you ‘round that bend at the window, thank you so much!” “Thank you!” Customer NOW pulls forward. I just recorded myself speaking that entire conversation, wanna guess how long it took? You’re right, 30 seconds, then a few seconds for them to pull forward to the window. That customer is going to get to the window with the drink propped right in front of them and they are going to say “wow, you guys are so fast today!” There is no “wait” time. But no. I tricked them. We are no faster than any other day. You’ve been fooled. Deceived.

[augustdementhe]

No such thing as “unskilled labor”.