iâm zeh (she/her, 20, bi) and this is my blog to write about yanderes and dark themes (stuff i do not condone btw, itâs all just fictional). your media consumption is your own responsibility. there are warnings of each of my works so please read them carefully.
so donât interact if youâre not into that.
i don't write for kpop groups that much at the time being but i guess it mostly depends on my mood. for now i create yandere ocs and write about them so let me know if you have any ideas <3
i donât have a segregated masterlist as of yet but click here to access my works !!
just a reminder that this blog is run by someone who:
â is anti ICE & fascism
â is pro-choice & feminist
â supports trans & queer people
â hates generative AI & capitalism
â supports immigrants & people of color
â is pro-environmentalism & social justice
â supports palestine & all other territories unjustly suffering
atp my works are getting eerily self indulgent as i'm getting obsessed more and more by players of a certain sport but well, it's alright i guess?
anyway i haven't slept in about 48 hours, have had way too much coffee then i should've, given an interview to a university for my postgraduate diploma, my endsems are in 2 days and i got to know that yesterday and i'm having physical reactions, so pardon me if the end feels a bit rushed, a girlie has to let out her ovulation hormones somewhere!
female reader. 1.4k words. DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT. warnings : this is noncon so please proceed with caution, implied kidnapping, the reader is a captive, the yandere is apologetic only verbally, unprotected sex. please proceed with caution, i'm telling you again, this is mostly just self indulgent filth. thank you.
the tubelight zaps on and off, dancing in its own rhythm, it had never done this in all the time you had been there, whether it was subtly foreshadowing an event occuring that had never done before, you didn't know and at this stage in your life, when most of your days were stuck in this artificial lighting and enclosed room with next to no furniture, no event could be predisposed to be good. you knew that at least.
As always, all you were left to play with was the one piece of jewellery that was allowed to you, a silver chain that you had traced more times than youâd like to admit now. The soap and the shampoo from the shower youâd just taken was still fresh, asserting itself in your nostrils. what day it was, you didnât know, what season it was. The list went on. You thought youâd have more aversion towards your situation than you actually do, but being here, kidnapped, could we call it? It had made you realize that if you wanted to survive it, it could only be through acceptance and patience. So you waited. Patiently. More often than not, you ended up losing your temper at the sheer arrogance of your kidnapper, who thought it was his very right to be loved by you. But you had also figured out that the days he was displeased with you would be harsh on you rather than him, so there had been lesser instances as such recently.Â
But he had never been angry on you.Â
The most he would be is give you boiled food for meals, or not see you for a while, but other than that whenever he would be there with you, he would be gentle, sweet, pampering you in his own way, even when you were throwing a tantrum.Â
The tubelight flickers again, this time more intensely and then turns off abruptly, a corner of the room near the door painted in darkness. Something seems to be off, pun intended.
At the very next moment there is a turn of the key, the sound of a lock unlocking, and your heartbeat rises, as it does everytime you see him, even though it has probably about a year since you were here in this room.Â
The only way you could measure time was by the length of your hair, they had been shoulder length when he first took you away and now it reached your elbows.Â
When he enters, he doesnât enter alone, the faded fragrance lingers in the air around him, it has faded but it still manages to suffocate you, the smell that attaches itself to the pillow you sleep on and to your very body.
He doesnât greet you or anything, but you stand up still in respect (?) or maybe just not knowing what to do to let him know that you acknowledge his presence. He walks up to you slowly, taking a pause by the bed and sitting down there instead.Â
âHey, are you okay?â
You walk up to him and place a hand on his shoulder, he still doesnât look at you.Â
âIâm fine, we just.. Lost. our first game in a decade almost.â
âOh,â you can barely verbalise it. But you can imagine the condition of the world right about now. Your kidnapper/celebrity crush was part of a sports team that prided itself on this game, on the legacy that it holds, one can only imagine the shambles the social media was in over them losing the game.Â
âItâs fine, sometimes you lose, itâs not a big deal,â
He looks up at you and you notice he looks like he has cried over this. After all, carrying a legacy is not such an easy task.Â
âItâs not, even you know it,â
You rub his back in an attempt to comfort him, he melts into your touch and takes his face in his hands in frustration, you realise that the least you can do is offer him a hug, so you sit down next to him and throw your arms around him.Â
âI need a favour tonight,â he says out of the blue.Â
You retract your hands from his body to yourself.Â
âYes?â
âRemember how i said i wonât touch you unless you ask me to?â
âYes?â
âI need to right now, the lack of touch is getting to me, and i just canât.â
Sitting beside him seemed to be a bad idea, you slowly withdraw to the other side of the bed.Â
âYou promised you wouldnât,â
âI know, itâs just, i donât want it to be someone else, do you understand?â
He gets up and smiles at your futile attempt to get away, closing in on you, the wall behind your back too close for your liking, there was a chance to get away had it not been so close.Â
âI know i promised you, my love, and it kills me to do this, but would you like it if your future husband slept with someone else while being with you?â
âNo, right?â he answers for you, and you can only nod.Â
He pushes your hair back, rubbing his nose over your neck, taking a deep inhale.Â
âOh dear, how much iâve wanted to do this,âÂ
When he licks a stripe near that very region, it evokes a jumpy reaction from you, which he only accelerates by sucking on the skin, in full intention to leave marks.Â
You try to push him away and lock away your neck from him, but it doesnât, instead he drags you to the bed and pushes you on it.
âiâm so sorry,â he keeps on repeating as he throws away your tshirt, then your shorts, then your underwear.
he towers above you as he frantically removes his own clothing, the shirt, the pant, and meanwhile he can't stop himself, so he starts kissing you just as he removes his underwear.
âgod, you don't know how much iâve wanted to do this,â
you try to paralyse yourself so that he gets the memo and withdraws but the one he's sucking on your skin and kissing you all over your body has, by this time, evoked multiple reactions from you, verbal and physical.
as his hand hovers your bra straps and he removes them and uncovers your nipples, he feels that he might cum just from looking at them.
all those times when he would imagine them from your low cut tops (or not, it didn't matter actually to him, if you're into boobs, you just need a bit of an imagination and youâre good to go)
he keeps sucking on them until they are sore, the left, then right, constantly keeping a hand on the other one so as to not let it be neglected. you reach out, in futile attempts, to pull his hand or his face away.
âi wish this was under different circumstances, princess, i really do, but i can't hold back, i need this release,â
with that he remembers that his dick is still out in the open, stroking it once, he rubs your pussy.Â
âthis is what you âdon'tâ want? i can't wait to see how it is when you want it,â pointing to the obvious moisture between your legs. you try to close them but it only takes one of his hands to pry them apart.
when he finally puts his dick inside you and buries himself in your neck, you don't know who is moaning or grunting anymoreâyou or him, the pressure feels so much inside your cunt but it feels like it is the only thing in the world that exists right now. him, you, interconnected like this.
âfuck, you're so warm and tight, so good,â
he keeps on thrusting, the two of you drowning in sweat and saliva, the shower that you had taken was very well gone to shit.
âplease, let me cum inside you, angel, please,â
âno, no, don't do it, please,â you speak up for the first time.
but it's too late, he's already thrusting like he's about to finish.
âfuck, iâm sorry, i really am,â again, he repeats, this time, you can feel hot tears sting your eyes, sonce he can't see them, you are safe. Â
and he passes out like that, on top of you, heaving from the activity that has taken place, and you wish, the entire night of something that might never be possible, something that will get you out of his arms.
this is a purely self indulgent work based on my evergreen fantasy of dating (or fucking) a neighbour and the subject for which, for the longest time was bangchan haha. but here, i've envisioned one of the cricketers that i've become attracted to (if there's anybody here who watches cricket, let me know!)
female reader. 3.4k words. warnings : consensual smut, but then kidnapping. please don't read if you're uncomfortable with such themes.
there should be a set of rules against dating your next door neighbour. but when you move out for the first time to the apartment where you currently live, thereâs barely any hint in the air about the destruction that will follow in the coming months.Â
the first few months are smooth and peaceful, thereâs a certain independence: the fact that you can sleep naked, and throw your dirty clothes in each and every corner if you want to, but also the downsides, nobody will be there to pick up those clothes, at the end youâll have to do it yourself and if you donât get up and make food for yourself, nobody else would. but that wasnât enough to discourage your spirit. there were also house parties, the one night stands, the occasional random sleepovers, done without any sort of specific permissions from anyone. and yet even with the groups of your friends cracking jokes on each other, the drinking games, the get-togethers every other weekend, still left you with a certain longing in your chest, a feeling that was unfulfilled lingered around your heart and a broken fridge in the peak summer might just be your answer to it all.Â
no moving out was complete without the breaking down of one important appliance, whether it be air conditioner, fan, fridge, television etc. and you were no different, except as far as lucks went, having your refrigerator break down in the middle of peak summer was maybe one of the worst ones to have. after repeatedly telling yourself that you donât need to walk out to the general store in this sun, because you donât âneedâ cold water, and repeatedly gulping down large amounts of room temperature water in an attempt to quench your thirst, you decide to do the most unhinged thing : knock on your neighbourâs door.Â
what seemed to be the worst decision ever in theory took even more time to implement, after searching up random yes or no generators to figure out if you should actually go through the decision or not (it was a yes, for anyone wondering), you finally find yourself standing right outside the door of your neighbour.Â
as soon as the door clicks open, you want nothing more than to go back and chug the room temperature water until you could drown in it, as a result of which, the blabbering ensues.Â
âuh, hi, iâm sorry to disturb-â the man that stands in the doorway practically is the size of the doorway, you crane your neck a bit upwards to look at him, his soft features, his kind eyes, the ones that accompany the smile on his face along with the wonder that comes with having a stranger at your door.Â
âiâm your neighbour,â to which he responds with a quick, âyes, yes i know,â
âi-uh, my fridge broke down last night and the repair guys said they would come today but you see, their van broke down so they said theyâll come whenever the van gets fixed, iâm sorry, what i meant was, can i have a chilled glass of water, please, if thatâs not much of a bother?âÂ
he just laughs. "Of course, do you want to come in?â
seeing your reluctant expressions at stepping inside a strange manâs house, despite the fact that heâs your neighbour, he points, âdonât worry, iâm not a creep, i have my son with me too, heâs 7. wait, that doesnât mean a person isnât a creep, but iâm just saying that you donât have to come inside, iâll give you your glass of water right here, i just donât want to be rude is all.â
to which you let out a laugh, âoh no, of course not, but iâll just have it here if you donât mind.âÂ
âjust give me a second.âÂ
as youâre waiting, you watch a pair of eyes curiously trying to get a good look at you from the corner that theyâre hiding in. when you spot him, he jumps and retreates inside the wall again.
âhey, you.â
he pokes out his head again.Â
âyes, you, thatâs who iâm talking about.â
he finally steps into view hesitantly. a small boy, with his fatherâs eyes and his motherâs- you donât really know and you are opposed to knowing, your stomach a pit at the thought of the woman who has entranced such a man and the beautiful family theyâve created. the inside of the home (at least from where you stand) is the culmination of the love that grows between people and is then extended to grow between walls.
âwhatâs your name?âÂ
he stands awkwardly fidgeting with the hem of his shirt for a few seconds, until he hears his father coming up from behind him. âitâs james, heâs too shy in front of women,â cue the child running away. âiâm sorry, he thinks of women as an alien subject, especially pretty women. he hasnât interacted with any females outside his school.â
he comes back with a glass of water and finally, finally, you quench your thirst! a big relief!
the subtle flirtation in him telling you about his son only comes to light after your objective with water is finished.
âyour wife?â it comes out before you want it to or even before you can process it even. what a way to dig your own grave. his expressions visibly become grim, âshe passed away while giving birth.â
âiâm so sorry, i didnât mean to bring that up, i just blurted it out, i donât know why.â
âitâs fine, don't worry about it.â even though he assures you that he's not fazed by the sudden mention of her, you still feel bad for bringing the topic up, because it could've easily turned into a flirtatious conversation if not for your peddling nature. but then again you didn't want to be one of those homewreckers and so had to ensure if she was in the picture or not.
he offered you a big bottle to keep for the day till your fridge gets fixed, which you cannot thank him enough for.Â
it hits you after you return home that this might be the most charming and goodlooking man youâve ever seen, when you call up your best friend and tell her about him. as it happens, his face flashes in front of your eyes as you're about to sleep, a wall separating the two of you.
----
yet this minor crush on your neighbour does not intervene or derail your daily routine, the college was closeby to this new apartment and so you took your sweet time in the morning - waking up, taking a bath, getting ready, preparing and having breakfast, most of which you weren't able to do unless you got up at the asscrack of dawn. and sometimes not even then.
and you're not reminded of that encounter with your neighbour, or your thoughts on him, until after a grocery run, as three bags weigh you down (courtesy of a house party coming up) and you meet him in the lift.
âneed some help?â he offers.
âyes please, thank you,â
when he notices the party poppers and the excessive snacks that for sure cannot be for a person alone, he suggests if you were having a party?Â
âyes, it's my friendâs birthday, we're throwing her a surprise party,â
âonly âfriendâ?â
you ask him what he meant by that and he repeats himself.
âi meant, you're doing all of this for someone who's just a âfriendâ?â
âwell, yes, i want her to feel good,â
âyou're too nice, i wish i had a friend like you,â
the statement puts you in a bit of an awkward position, but you handle it well. the lift opens on your floor and you walk slowly as you talk.
âconsider me your friend, anyway we're each other's first responders so it's best we have a friendship to check up on each other.
especially since i live alone.â
âyou live alone, why?â
âiâve always wanted to enjoy my independence, you know, and now that iâm financially stable iâm finally getting to be that.â
as you reach your door, you unlock it with your free hand, inviting him in.Â
âthanks for helping me, would you like to have a cup of coffee maybe? i make a killer cappucino,â
âif you insist, iâll have it.â
over this cup of coffee, many things seem to unravel, the grasp of it is the undeniable attraction that you both seem to reciprocate for the other, the eyes that lock into each other for too long, the accidental touches, the repeated mentions of how lonely it gets, the desperate need to be relatable to the other. it is then established that you are going to fuck your neighbour, when and how, you didnât know, but you did know it would be sooner than you thought. it was inevitable, with the way his body towered over yours and the lasting effect of how his closeness affected, it was bound to happen.Â
a few more âdatesâ which was just hanging out at the otherâs house, (his own when his son was at school, or at his parentâs or at a playdate or either yours, late in the night when he was fast asleep) and it leads to a night where there is a particularly notorious thunderstorm outside your bedroom window, youâve not quite planned to meet him tonight but the thunder was scaring the life out of you. it was well into the night, almost more than midnight, so you decide to call him.Â
âhey, whatâs up?â you ask him nonchalantly. âwere you sleeping? did i disturb you?âÂ
âoh no, sweetheart, you tell me, what happened, is everything okay? why the sudden call?â
after beating around the bush for a few seconds, you get to the point, not caring about what it made you seem like, it was a fact that you were scared of thunderstorms, anybody who wanted to be with you should know that, right? after he makes sure his son is comfortably asleep, he rings your bell.Â
âhi, are you okay?â
âyes. ofcourse.â you try to play it off but he can see it in your eyes, a fazed look.Â
when you take him to your room, heâs surprised to see youâve made a whole blanket fort to sleep inside, he didnât know that phobia of a thunderstorm could be this deep.Â
âcome inside, sit with me.â
and he sits with you there, as you tell him anecdotes about your life, your phobias, particularly the one with thunder, he listens patiently, and at the moment there is nothing else for him, selfish as he may sound, even his son that breathed calmly under the covers was forgotten, only you existed, you in this soft light, you in this blanket fort where no one could touch you or harm you, you always by his side, thatâs what he wanted.Â
âcan you come close a bit?â he requests and you do as he says and are visibly surprised when he leans in for a kiss. not that you were opposed to it, his lips are soft, hot cakes, moist and calling you in for more and more, and he kisses gently but with conviction of not letting you go anytime soon.Â
his hand then travels towards the cleavage he has wanted to grope ever since you came on that hot summer day outside his door, in a flimsy tanktop, asking for chilled water, and it is so soft, so bouncy he wants to grab it again and again, and when he touches the very tip of your nipples, the moans you make while kissing him tests his hardness further and further. he places you on his lap so you have an idea on how bad he wants you.Â
âcan i?â he asks about removing your top, and repeats as he wants to remove the bra as well.Â
you nod, thereâs nothing you want more in this moment than his hands all over your body and his mouth sucking at your nipples.Â
but you also want to see him naked, so you signal him to lift off his shirt too, which he does compliantly.Â
âand pants?â you nod, those too, off with them.Â
he only smiles. he just hopes to be good since hasnât quite had any action since his wife passed away, one or two hookups here and there, none of them all the way quite.Â
âcan i remove yours too?â he asks you, and you nod again, already feeling an empty throbbing inside your core, which is only satiated when he enters his two fingers inside, is that okay? you nod and grab him tightly, your fingers digging inside his biceps.Â
he eats up the scene, your face as it furrows in pursuit of pleasure, the slight screen of sweat on your face, the slight redness, the closed or rolling eyes, he wants to remember it forever, he wants it to have it each and every night of his life, along with your moans of his name repeatedly, over and over again as if that was the only word you could ever remember in your life. and when he enters you? it is the closest to heaven heâs ever been, the soft, warm hole taking him in so smoothly as if it was made for him and him only.Â
he undoubtedly decides to call it the best night of his life, thank thor for the thunder!
----
he did not get to have a proper married life with his wife, since they were together for only almost 6-7 months before jumping in to get married, and he was also not as financially stable as he is now, so he could never really spoil her with gifts when she was alive. a problem that he is never going to let happen with you, youâre showered with the best that he can afford, be it food, clothes, makeup, books, whatever that you briefly mention is either ordered right in front of you or drops by on your doorstep a couple days later.Â
this shouldâve made you happy. everything was just perfect, the sex, the emotional needs, the material needs were all satisfied, the person himself was one of the most loving partner youâve had, if not the only one, and yet it felt suffocating, a constant strain. what began as an attempt to cure you of your loneliness started being something that was actively interfering with your daily life.Â
he was everywhere. your workplace, on the pretext of dropping and picking you up. your house, and if not there he would have you over to his own, he would even knock at the bathroom door if you were inside for too long.Â
it felt suffocating and obsessive and just right at your neck, so you had to end it.Â
but you couldnât tell him the actual reason, so you had to go with âyouâre too serious, i canât be that serious, i want to live my life and exploreâ which was also true and yet not the entire reason for the breakup. it hurt to go through with the decision but in your mind you were convinced you were making the right choice by turning him away so he can find someone that is more available for him.Â
but in this short span of dating him, you couldnât get to know him. he, on the other hand, had started knowing you and noticing you. so he knew for a fact that this was not what it seemed, but what could he do if this is what you wanted? he shut the door rather gloomily that day, his son pestering him with questions about you, to which he just replies with, âsheâs just going to be busy for sometime,â and ends up sleeping in his room.
----
a few days later, he decided that enough days have passed for him to reconnect with you and talk about what happened, or ask about it, because he had accepted most of it, he just needed you to talk him through it once more, it is not as easy to get on with your daily routine when your life has just crumbled.Â
he waits after he rings the bell, and he knows youâre home, there is slow music coming from your bedroom balcony to his, tracks that have made their way into his own playlist from yours, but he doesnât have the heart to play them anymore.Â
a few minutes later, he rings it again, it is suspicious, heâs a little scared for you, but soon enough there is a padding of footsteps and a man heâs never seen in his life opens it, his first response is to think, maybe it is the wrong apartment, or maybe he didnât even notice that you moved away, but those doubts are cleared when your voice echoes through the doorway, âis it the pizza?â
âum, whatâs up, man? are you okay?â
âuh, yeah, wrong house, sorry,â
he turns away and pretends to look into his phone for an address while the man closes the door.
back home, he collapses as soon as he enters, his heart dropping to the pit of his stomach, is this why you didnât want to be serious? because you wanted to âexploreâ? was it worth it for you to give him up for dating a bunch of random guys who donât look like they even know what theyâre doing?
it was all too much for him. but he knew he couldnât let his son see him like that, so the very next day he drops him off to his grandparents house, and both of the parties are extremely overjoyed at this opportunity.
---
âcan we have dinner? one last time? at my place?â
you sigh as you read the text, why wonât he just leave you alone? there was enough guilt eating you up when you looked out the window and saw him there sometimes, but this permanence, was it really for you? should you really string someone along for your own benefit?
but you decide that the least you can do is offer him a closure sort of a thing, so you decide to take him up on his offer.
âhow have you been doing?â
your very presence has left him bothered, while his face is painted with dark circles and a visible stubble, your face looks like it could feature in a skincare commercial without photoshopping anything and he's annoyed by it, wondering whether this was the work of the man standing in your doorway.
âjust okay, yeah,â
when you ask him about his son, he informs you that he had been begging to visit his grandparents, the small talk circles around your job, his son, his job until it gets to the nerve.
he puts his fork down, âwhy?âÂ
the question doesn't need any more elaboration, you know what he's talking about and he's aware that you know.
âi don't know if i want to be serious, iâm sorry,â
âso you want to sleep around with the entire town but you draw the line at settling down with a good man?â
you're offended at the comment, âiâm sorry, who told you i was sleeping around? are you crazy?â
âi saw the guy staying over the other night,â
âhe was a friend, i don't even know why iâm explaining this to you when we're not even together anymore,â you get up, leaving your sandwich half eaten, âthank you for the dinner, and don't you dare interfere in my life anymore,â
he gets up and grabs your arm to stop you, âwait, wait, wait, iâm really sorry, i didn't know, iâm so sorry, iâve been spiraling, iâm a mess, iâm really sorry, it's hard to go back to normal when you made my life so wonderful, and now iâm just lonely again. so fucking lonely.â
your eyes soften a little, taking into note his appearance since the time you walked in. you had been so busy painting him as the bad guy that you didn't notice the pain in his eyes.Â
he takes the opportunity to lean in for a kiss, and before you can push him away, he has grabbed a suspicious looking handkerchief to put over your nose.Â
donât date neighbours, but also, donât date them and then breakup with them and then go on a closure date to their house too. it can get you trapped.
dialogue prompts/sentence starters for (dark) smut writers. feel free to use these; credit not needed but appreciated! minors dni. tw for dark content (non/dubcon, stalking, kidnapping, and so on)
"You're shaking, love. Are you that desperate for my touch?"
"You think I like hurting you? You give me no choice."
"You're safe with me. I won't let anyone else touch you, ever."
"That's it, baby, take it all... I want you to be so full of me you forget your own name."
"Why did you close the blinds last night? I hate not being able to see you."
"I love how tight you get when you're scared."
"Come back to bed... Don't make me tie you up again."
"Go on, lie to me. Tell me you hate me while you're leaking all over my fingers."
"You left the window open. Were you hoping I'd stop by and catch you asleep?"
"I know it hurts, angel. Don't worry, you'll learn to crave it."
"Don't bother locking your door. I had a spare key made."
"Why can't you see we're meant to be?"
"I know you're awake. Stop pretending."
"I installed cameras in your bedroom... I had to make sure you're safe when I'm not there."
"Stop screaming, doll. If you can't behave inside, how am I ever supposed to let you out of the house again?"
"Just let me take care of you."
"It's all your husband's/wife's/partner's fault. Can't you see they're trying to keep us apart?"
"Why are you crying? I saved you. Stop being so ungrateful."
"I'm keeping you here for your own safety. It's too dangerous outside."
"It's okay if you don't kiss me back yet. You're so cute when you're shy."
"Did you really think you could escape?"
"Look how you're stretching around my cock... it's a perfect fit. We were made for each other."
"Don't close your eyes now. I want you to see who owns you."
"Come on, let me in. You won't like what happens if you don't."
is it normal that lately i have started crying about things that haven't happened yet and probably won't happen for a long time at night ? is that normal ?