Made a side blog so I don't end up getting harrassed on my main✌️ So I guess this is sorta an intro post
You can call me Jan or Andrei (ya I am kinda stuck between the two rn)
I go by he/him (they/them is also acceptable but I have a strong preference for he/him)
I'm living in Germany, German is my first language. I am fluent in English, but I still have no idea when to separate words and when to use hyphens 💀
I'm a closeted, pre-t gay trans man (technically bi/pan/whatever, but it's a strong preference for men and masculine people - I guess that makes me mspec gay or something?)
I talk about transandrophobia, so if you don't like that, block and move on, elseway I will simply block you. I am however open for genuine, good faith discussions, as long as I have the energy for it. If I don't respond but haven't blocked you, that's probably why. Sorry.
The same goes for any kind of bigotry (including transmisogyny(!), exorsexism, intersexism, aro/acephobia, bi/panphobia, etc.), general assholery (body shaming, trolling, bad faith discussions, etc.) or simply being annoying to me personally (sorry! mainly goes for gimmick/rp blogs)
Anyways, it's dangerous to go alone, so take this blåhaj png:
I'm Az, as a few of you might know by now, either from my info posts, some of the donations I boost, or some kind of controversy. I've been very vocal about my 4 year journey trying to get out of Tajikistan as a transmasc student.
I recently got the amazing news of a full scholarship to a university in the UK. But I was confronted with the reality that I did not account for all the costs that come with moving. I knew there would be flight costs, vaccinations, visa application fees and more, which is why I've been saving up for the last 3 years.
Unfortunately I'm still short, particularly after realising i missed some hidden fees and particularly the Immigration Health Charge of £2716. I will work hard at making as big of a dent in this as I can, but any assistance at all would be great.
I'm Az, as a few of you might know by now, either from my info posts, some of the donations I boost, or some kind of controversy. I've been very vocal about my 4 year journey trying to get out of Tajikistan as a transmasc student.
I recently got the amazing news of a full scholarship to a university in the UK. But I was confronted with the reality that I did not account for all the costs that come with moving. I knew there would be flight costs, vaccinations, visa application fees and more, which is why I've been saving up for the last 3 years.
Unfortunately I'm still short, particularly after realising i missed some hidden fees and particularly the Immigration Health Charge of £2716. I will work hard at making as big of a dent in this as I can, but any assistance at all would be great.
what pisses me off the most is that when I was 14 and having the same arguments with men about feminism in the GamerGate/MGTOW/RedPill/BlackPill days of Reddit, that’s the exact same shit they would say.
and as a young, naive, hopeful, idealistic child, I genuinely searched for and found feminist scholarship by men to provide. of course, that didn’t satisfy the men’s rights activists because they don’t actually care, they just hate women & by extension, feminism.
Context: OP is a misogynist throwing a tantrum because she lost an argument against a trans man over whether or not trans men experience misogyny, because obviously they do.
The “men’s rights activist” was a trans man, a marginalized man, explaining he experiences misogyny and oppression.
They are not saying any of this in good faith, they are lying because they think no one who follows them will ever see their comments so they can pretend to be in the right.
Here’s the post you can find their comments on, expand replies under the comment by Salvagethevixen https://www.tumblr.com/zmpl/813633856275185664/i-miss-2014-feminism-so-much-we-were-all-so-newly
💬 317 🔁 4681 ❤️ 18061 · i miss 2014 feminism so much. we were all so newly progressive. we just learned what the word intersectionality me
like I said on that post, idk how to explain to any of you that you’re wrong because you don’t understand anything, refuse to educate yourselves, and outright reject info from anyone who isn’t a man.
men do not experience misogyny. no, trans men do not disprove that.
You were called a misogynist because you repeatedly called trans men telling you they've been affected by misogyny stupid, immature, "addicted to being a victim/the most victimised", downplayed their lives experiences and assumed them to be uneducated because they disagreed with you, on a comment saying people use trans men as an excuse to be misogynistic to them.
Also, here's the full conversation with @faggotryenjoyer without cherry picking:
Also, no one is "rejecting any info from someone who isn't a man". First of all, it's from people who aren't trans men. TRANS men. Second of all, it's explicitly on the topic of what TRANS MEN experience. Even the screenshot you yourself showed says "about my own oppression". Not feminism as a whole. Not misogyny as a whole. Nor did anyone say they're the most oppressed or the most victimised.
Thank god Zain is in a much much better position now than he was before but can you also help our mutual friend not get found out by his parents and/or beaten up by them?
the state of Tennessee is now requiring all "women" have at least 1 child. a woman's sterilization surgery was canceled because she hadn't had 1 child yet. are transmascs allowed to talk about reproductive oppression now? are we allowed to talk about literally any of our problems yet?
Seconding this. Used that list and cross-referenced it with my insurance, found a doctor who did an amazing job taking out the whole kit and kaboodle with minimal pain and minimal scarring.
I've had a (partial, technically) hysterectomy since 2022. it was the best decision I've ever made and I will stand 10 toes down on that. nothing has had a more meaningful impact on my quality of life than that singular surgery. getting that thing out of my body single-handedly added years to my lifespan via sheer stress reduction alone.
if anyone is considering surgical sterilization, and has any medical questions about the various options available, please ask me anything and everything.
I did so much research prior to getting it done (...I wanted to make an informed decision), but a lot of people aren't even aware that different options exist. or they're only aware of some of the aspects, but not others.
for instance, did you know that you can negotiate where you want your incisions to be?
I specifically didn't want a scar along the "bikini line" because it reminded me too much of a c-section scar and that would be dysphoric for me, so my surgeon and I had a conversation and we decided to just extend the belly button incision a bit instead (because they still have to pull your uterus out of the body somehow and I was keeping my cervix, so we couldn't go out through the vagina like you'd usually do).
there's a massive amount of anti-hysterectomy disinformation on the internet, spread by various anti-abortion pro-forced-birther groups specifically to scare people out of getting sterilized in any way (they're typically the same groups spreading a lot of the anti-IUD disinformation as well). if you ever see something talking about how your spine will slowly collapse into your body or whatever..... that's where that comes from lol. same about anyone fearmongering about pelvic organ prolapse.*
*your biggest risk factor for pelvic organ prolapse (which, by the way, is not the worst thing that can happen to somebody. yeah you don't want it to happen, but things like old age and lifting heavy weights can cause it. we've got techniques for attaching your organs back into your body. you'll be fine. it really isn't the end of the world, I promise you) is giving birth. most people who get hystos are pericis women who have already had children. most studies that have looked at this have stated this skew in the data, since it's hard to tell what confounding variables are impacting the results. as far as we can currently tell, if you have not had any kids, you probably aren't putting yourself at a massively greater risk of prolapse, if any at all.**
**there are some theories that the reason we see higher rates of prolapse post-hysto in parous individuals could be due to structural changes in those pelvic muscles and tissues after birth, making them less resilient to further changes (like removing an organ), whereas somebody who is nulliparous with full structural support intact may be able to handle a hysto without much of an issue. like a jenga tower. imagine the tower has already had a bunch of blocks taken out of the bottom of it, and now you're taking another block out. it's more likely to fall, compared to if you were taking a block out of a tower that was fully intact with no blocks removed yet.
(also I'm not trying to body shame with any of the above notes about structural integrity. it's just a medical fact that giving birth does damage to your body, especially your pelvic floor. human beings (and any other creature tbh) were evolutionarily pressured for offspring and parents to survive childbirth. whether or not we had permanent non-lethal health problems was just not part of the darwinian equation, there. you can survive with a fucked up pelvic floor. as long as it doesn't kill you and your offspring can survive to reproduce (& especially if you survive to have even more kids), that's 99% of what evolution really selects for. the human spine is a structural mess that's prone to issues. those issues make you miserable, but rarely kill you or prevent you from reproducing. so it just... doesn't get selected out of the population. there's a lot of shaming around the bodies of people who give birth and I just want you to know that being disabled is not a moral flaw. having a body that has been ravaged by a baby is not a moral flaw. having a pelvic floor that has been torn to shreds from a 3rd degree tear is not a moral flaw. but it's still a factual reality that having kids f u c k s up your body, health-wise, in many ways. also fuck anyone who turns it into an aesthetics or beauty thing. I'm aware there's that whole aspect of social pressures, and that that's why people get so touchy about admitting that having kids fucked up their body, because they associate "fucking up your body" as being an appearance thing. and like. no. i mean that in a health way. you pushed a baby out of a very small space and tore through your own muscles. that causes permanent damage! that is a type of fucking up of your body! it doesn't have to be visual! aaaaaaa)
"but women right here right now can wear pants so clearly transmisogyny is the ONLY real transphobia and it's impossible for transmisandry to exist! masculinity and gender non-conformity is celebrated in women i swear!" yeah ok sure, because in our culture today this:
is obviously indistinguishable from this:
the only difference between these is that some don't have pockets! /sarcasm
I think the one of the most frustrating things to come out of the discourse for me is that you spend your time here right, just seeing post after post of transandrophobic statements. Not just here, but also on other social media. You see them and some even archive them for a variety of purposes including block lists.
Then you might talk about what you've seen, both specific statements and common sentiments, right? Because you have pattern recognition and can determine views without directly quoting.
And someone will comment on that post and send you an ask like "you're making this up, nobody is actually saying this, nobody has ever said this."
And you're looking at the archives and you know what you've seen and you feel like they're either not seeing it somehow, interpreting it all wrong somehow, or trying to gaslight you.
So you feel the archives are more vital than ever, because they just won't believe what is going on unless they see it, only to get told that such behaviour is bad of you too (and somehow every single case you've ever seen is just a psyop and not actually real especially if it's from a queer person).
Seriously this- And if you pick out one person as an example, it's "Well, that's just one person's view! They aren't even a big account!" - so you pick an example from a big account, and that's "Uh, why are you trying to brigade someone who is already under attack?" - If you don't link one individual person, but show a pattern of different users across many years all saying the same terrible things, it's "You're obsessed, why worry about this stuff that happened years ago, just ignore it!" And if you show loads of recent examples it's "Oh well, this is so sudden it must be a psyop!"
And I don't know at what point you just have to admit that a big portion of the western LGBT community hates trans men, or doesn't find hatred-of-trans-men to be worth breaking a friendship over. If people can be so easily "psyopped" into hating trans men as a whole then, there was something wrong with them in the first place.
Stop conflating passing with being stealth challenge 2026
I pass 90% of the time. I've been on T for 6 months. I got lucky that I have a small chest.
I am still waiting for my coworkers to gender me correctly and include me with the men. I am still waiting for my family to gender me correctly and not try to talk me into femininity again. I am still assigned "women's tasks". I am still treated worse than my brother. I am still assumed weak and incompetent by default. I even still get catcalled outside occasionally.
Passing for me didn't mean I went from "woman" to "man" in the eyes of anyone but total strangers. It meant I moved from "slightly weird girl (lesbian?)" to "mentally ill, delusional trend hopping, attention seeking girl-man-thing".
Passing means dog shit if the people around you know you're trans but are transphobic and won't stop outing you (or your documents do it for you) and therefore the only times there's a chance to have "male privilege" is in the 30 seconds at the grocery store register or when someone asks me for directions, as long as I'm not with someone who outs me.
A very large chunk of intersex women and girls aren’t allowed to be pro athletes in track or running anymore and I wish more people were talking about it or hell, even just knew about it. I wish there was more of an outcry. I wish people cared more about defending intersex people in sport because why does it seemingly only fall on intersex athletes themselves to fight this shit at great cost to their privacy and safety.
"The Tom-Boy Who Was Changed Into A Real Boy," a children's poem written between 1859 and 1862 and published by McLoughlin Brothers Publishing in New York.
The poem is part of the "Aunt Oddamadood series," which appeared to primarily create entertaining yet moralistic poems for children, in which a naughty child (other examples include "Little Miss Consequence," "The Conceited Boy," "The Mischievous Fingers") is presented and shown the error of their ways, to teach children what will happen if they do not behave. With that context, the purpose of this poem appears to warning children raised as girls that, should they act like a tomboy, they will eventually be quietly sent off to sea. It is made clear both at the beginning and the end of the poem that the child's tomboyish nature is a "fault" and something the audience must be "cautioned" about.
I learned about this poem from this small collection of transgender antebellum (pre-Civil War) USAmerican children's literature, collected by historian Jen Manion. Another relevant example from that collection is "Lucy Nelson; or, the Boy-Girl," the story of a child assigned female who dislikes femininity and prefers playing with her brothers and acting like a boy. Lucy and their brothers get in trouble, but Lucy is singled out for punishment. They are forced to wear boys clothes for a month; this doesn't initially seem that bad, but it becomes clear that the real punishment is subjecting Lucy to gendered humiliation. Lucy's brother laugh at them, declare that if they dress as a boy then they will "be treated as one," leading to them being physically and verbally cruel to them. At a dinner party, the stress of the gendered humiliation they are facing for their transmasculinity reaches a breaking point. A guest's fixation and confusion on their gender leads them to shout, in tears, "I am not a boy!" to end the inquisition.
Lucy's story ends not with them simply realizing they are a girl; it is explicitly detailed that it is very difficult for them to resist their "boyish" nature and they were "in danger of lapsing," but that eventually they became an "obedient little girl," having been successfully humiliated back into appropriate (and, notably, white) daughterhood. These examples show clearly how the narrative around the "acceptance" of tomboys hides the very real disdain and cruelty directed at transmasculinized youth that has existed in Western culture for centuries. Rather than their masculinity being praised, or the masculinization of a young girl being seen as positive, these tomboys are depicted as out-of-control, insufficiently white, and further masculinization is depicted as a punishment done to tomboys, something meant to be humiliating and scary, thus coercing them back to the role of daughterwifemother.
Also wanna add that this is a good example of malgendering in history, and why that term is so important when talking about anti-transmasculinity.
For both Lucy and the tomboy-turned-sailor, further masculinization is a punishment. The story of Lucy literally uses the phrase "if she dresses like a boy, we'll treat her like a boy" as a justification for verbal and physical harassment and humiliation.
& while the poem is lighthearted and meant to be fun, it is very clear that becoming a sailor is not something the tomboy is doing for fun or of his own volition. The poem explicitly describes the transition as happening "quite quietly" and "without noise," and being orchestrated by an unclear "them" which we can assume is likely the tomboy's family. Being a sailor was a job which involved hard manual labor, dangerous circumstances, and associated with lower-class (thus sexually dangerous) men. Again, this poem is from a series of moralistic poems which very clearly lay out for children what happens when you act "bad." The message here is: if you, little girl, try to act like a boy, you will become coarse and unloveable and be sent away to sea to live amongst dirty, dangerous cis men.
This is why malgendering is such an important term and concept, for all trans people, but here particularly with anti-transmasculinity. And I also hope that y'all keep these examples in your back pocket to use the next time you hear someone run their mouth about how the patriarchy just isn't that concerned about policing masculinity in people perceived as girls, because ummmm patriarchy LIKE boy stuff duh!!!!!!!!
This is really interesting to me because its so seldom that something lines up so well with my particular experience of having grown up intersex and as a transmasculine person. An experience that has led me to believe that the reason the policing of transmasculinity in kids is seen as "invisible" or even non-existent is because it often functions not on a level of open hostility, but on a subtle level of coy, "concerned for your future" social isolation, ostracism, and humiliation that feels orchestrated like a dance throughout your childhood and impossible to explain to anyone not on the transmasc or butch spectrum. I started getting "helpful" comments, snide remarks, and even doctors office visits about "fixing" how masculine my body and presentation were literally even before I realized I was trans or started to consciously play with my gender presentation.
Little girls and kids who were AFAB are only "allowed" to be tomboys insofar as their eventual assimilation into gender conforming feminine womanhood can be assured. If that assimilation is at all in question, the gloves come off really quick and they start considering forcing you onto supplemental estrogen.
just in case it needs to be stated plainly "transandrophobe" is not a substitute word for trans fem. trans fems are not more likely to be transandrophobic than the average person. trans fems are not the enemy or the Ultimate Oppressor of trans mascs. if anyone adds to my posts about how "trans women are always xyzing" or some other divisive nonsense blaming trans women at large for the behaviour of some random assholes online as if theyre a hive mind you're getting blocked. you're just as bad as the people you claim to criticize.
no because really, the basic thought that goes unchallenged and has been internalized by much of the queer community is that transmasc’s presence in a space is potential cause for concern, but our absence never is. We are always at risk of taking up all the air from everyone else, and are never deserving of it. Do you understand what i mean? this is the sort of shame i came to know very quickly as a young trans man online. and I think we should all reflect on that impulse and what greater good exactly its supposed to serve.
and- i will say- this shame didn’t feel all that different at all from being a girl online and having people talk snidely about the interests of young girls or their imposter status in other communities. It absolutely was not a new feeling to be put down and shamed in that way and i think that made it hurt worse.
i fear the core ideology of transandrophobia trusting is a refusal to accept that as men yall benefit from male privilege and the patriarchy. like full stop. sure maybe not in every situation or context but anywhere that you are recognized as the men that you are, you’re benefiting from male privilege and the patriarchy. you might not like that, it might upset you or make you uncomfortable, but just like white people benefiting from racism and white privilege, it’s a fact of reality no matter whether you want those benefits or not. and ignoring or denying that reality does a lot to make male privilege and the patriarchy more powerful. just like white fragility functions as a tool to reinforce and uphold white supremacy, transmasc fragility functions in the same way for the patriarchy.
the problem is is that my experience with male privilege (someone who has been medically transitioning for 2+ years, generally passes around 75% of the time but is not very hard to clock) is going to be a thousand times different that the experience of someone who has not started medically transitioning, and does not pass.
even then, i am still biologically female. i still experience medical misogyny (on a semi daily basis since i am severely chronically ill).
there is not one single person in my life that does not know i am trans. this will most likely never change.
so sure, a stranger on the street who will see me once and never again will treat me with the immediate respect and privilege that they would a cis man, i do NOT deny that.
but at the end of the day i am still AFAB, i am also Jewish, neurodivergent/mentally ill and severely disabled.
the problem isnt that trans men dont think they are/want to be perceived as cis men, its that people use this as a catch all to claim that trans men dont experience hell, and no amount of male privilege that is only given under incredibly specific circumstances can make up for.
we are still the group with the highest risk of sexual assault, forced sex work, domestic abuse and murder. male privilege doesnt cover up transphobia.
It's just saddling the horse from the wrong side. You* can't just say "men have male privilege" and treat it as a law of nature, as a "fact of reality". We know the average (straight white pericis) man has male privilege because that privilege is objectively observable and measurable. Dominating high social positions in politics and economy. Earning more than any other gender. More rights in most of the world. And so on.
If you want to know now if trans men have male privilege, you have to look at the actual facts, and from there see if the conclusion is "yes, they do" or "no, they don't" or something in-between. But you can't just assert that they do based on a conclusion that came from (straight white peri-)cis men, because while both are men, they have very different material conditions. The same way you can't 1:1 transfer the experience of cis women onto trans women without looking at the objective facts, which is why we have transmisogyny as a concept separate from (cis-)misogyny.
Theory is meant to follow reality, not the other way around. Or else you are the only following ideology instead of reality.
*"You" directed at anon and people in general, not OP
Heads up my trans and queer friends, do not participate in this study. Spread the word to stay away;
Skeet from Alejandra Caraballo that says: If you see this, don't participate. It's a rigged study by Lisa Littman and unethical researcher J. Michael Bailey meant to undermine access to care. Spread the word.
here's an article about this. any statistics of this study are extremely likely to be nitpicked or outright edited for whatever narrative they want to push with it. (specifically, it's likely they're fishing for "evidence" of "rapid-onset gender dysphoria".)
yeah, boyyy @kindofabastard - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
