Item: Weiner Amulet; grants the wearer the status of “Weiner Sovereign” with all the honors and privileges appended to that lofty title, whether they want them or not.
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@kirberburgey
Item: Weiner Amulet; grants the wearer the status of “Weiner Sovereign” with all the honors and privileges appended to that lofty title, whether they want them or not.
why is it always them
at least it didn't involve classified documents this time?
no but I think finding one in a war zone and measuring it out of spite is at least on the same level
Year of the horse girl
how to cover letter:
polite greeting (it's me, boy)
introduction (i'm the ps5)
establish credentials (speaking to you inside your brain)
establish purpose (leave the girl, we don't need her)
describe what you can bring to the organization (cowboy times in space)
Yes, I absolutely do accept Must the frog.
they are not “gay little fingerless gloves”. they sre my normal sized fingerless gloves of undisclosed sexuality.
my hips don't lie but they will exaggerate details, misrepresent the facts, and on occasion deceive via omission of crucial information
every time I think about Dilbert I think about this comic and how the question being asked is Not Stupid and its answer is genuinely interesting and arguably very important information anyone using a computer should know
"Um," said the fairy. "Choose something else."
Rosamund hesitated. It was, she had to admit, the first time she had ever been given a wish, so she wasn't an expert with this sort of thing, but she felt that this was not part of the typical script. "Sorry," she said. "Is that not allowed?"
The fairy grimaced. When it spoke, its voice came out pained and stressed. "Y-y-y-e-e-e-no," it sighed at last, dragonfly wings sagging. "No, technically no, it's not not allowed, but-" It suddenly brightened. "How about gold? Can't go wrong with gold. Gold's a good wish."
Rosamund frowned. This was really not going the way she expected at all. "Excuse me-"
"Beauty, that's a good one too, beauty's always popular," it went on. "And if there's a ball nearby tonight I can probably-"
"Excuse me!"
The wand was twiddled in chitinous fingers. "Right," the fairy said, sounding scolded. "Sorry, it's just..." Its voice trailed off.
Her grandmother's clock chimed midnight from the mantelpiece.
Then - "I'm sorry," it said, not daring to look up, "I know it's not fair, but - you know what I am. You know what we do to wishes. If you wished for wealth I'd have to turn your hair into silver, so you’d have to tear every strand out of your head before you could spend it. We can't help it. It's what we do. The cost of a wish is that you get what you want, but you don't get it the easy way.
"So if you wish for a child, it'll be - strange. Twisted, somehow. Made of pine or marzipan or have the head of a hedgehog. That's the cost of a wish-child; you'll get the child you wished for, but it'll never be - right."
Rosamund waited to see if there was anything else. She felt a sting to her pride when she realized there wasn't. "Is that all?" she said. "I wouldn't care what I got-"
"You all say that," the fairy said. "You all say you wouldn't care what you got. You all say it, and you really believe it, until the neighbours sneer at you and your hedgehog child for too long, or your back aches because your thumb-high child can't help you in the fields, or your pine child kicks and bites and won't obey, and then you think, 'This isn't the way it was supposed to be,' and then..."
The fairy stopped and looked into Rosamund’s eyes. It was a beautiful thing, all glittering carapace and iridescent wings, but just for an instant it looked terribly, terribly old.
"I'm sorry," it said. "But I'm tired of making unloved children."
"I will give my life for this child," she replies in one world. "By my love or by my flesh and blood."
"So be it," the fairy replies. "You will keep your word."
And in one version of that world, she proves the fairy's fears wrong. She loves her hedgehog, thumb-high, surly pine child with all her heart. The child grows knowing it is wanted and loved. It grows knowing it always has a home, that it belongs.
In another version of that world, Rosamund fails. On the evening she gives up, the fairy finds her. "You promised," it says. In that world, the fairy takes her flesh and blood for the child, crafts it a body that will belong. And Rosamund becomes a soft pine doll, waiting to be loved, waiting to be real.
In this world, in either version, the child grows up happy and belonging.
In another world, the fairy's ancient grief stabs Rosamund deeper than her pride. "Where are these children?" she asks, horrified.
"Many are long-dead," the fairy replies.
"But not all. Take me to them."
"Is that your wish?" the fairy asks.
"If it must be."
In one version of this world, the fairy brings her to a household with a prickly, hedgehog daughter. The girl's mother cries, "How can I love her if I cannot hold her?"
"You were given a gift!" Rosamund roars in this world. "Give her to me if you are too cowardly to love her."
Rosamund takes the daughter and gently holds the girl's hands. "You deserve so much more than you've received."
"Are there more?" Rosamund asks the fairy once the girl has fallen asleep.
"Yes."
"Take me to them."
"You haven't even had this child for one night."
"How can I let those children wait? None of them deserve such pain."
In another version of this world, the fairy refuses. "You do not know what you ask."
"And you don't know what you've begun," Rosamund replies. She leads a crusade to find the fae children, to save them.
She lavishes the children with praise and love, but the story becomes twisted. Such brave children they are, daring to live despite such odd lives.
The thumb-high child will never find a spouse, and yet he remains so cheerful. What an inspiration he is.
In another world, Rosamund says, "Let me prove it to you."
"How?" the fairy challenges.
Rosamund does not hesitate. "Marry me. Let me prove I can love the strange and fae. Let me prove my love is stronger than daydreams and gossip. When you believe me, we will make a child together however you wish."
In one version of this world, the fae says, "No. Choose another wish."
"No," Rosamund replies. And the two remain locked in stalemate and the story never ends.
In another version of this world, the fae sighs. "Is that your wish?"
"No. My wish is unchanged, but I am willing to wait for your approval. I wait for bread to rise and rain to fall. Waiting on you for a child will be no hardship."
"And if I never approve?"
"You will."
And in this version, Rosamund and the fae are wed. Rosamund's friends and family harry her with concern. Her meager wealth dwindles as fewer are willing to buy the bread she bakes for fear of her spouse's enchantments.
"Do you regret this yet?" the fairy asks.
"When I was cold last week, you draped a cloak of cobwebs around my shoulders and I stopped shivering. How could I regret such kindness?"
After a long period without rain and the village drives them both out, the fairy asks again, "do you regret this yet?"
"When we had too little to drink, you collected the dew from every blade of grass around our home so we did not thirst. How could I regret such clever diligence?"
And when Rosamund falls deeply ill after too many nights sleeping exposed to every chilled breeze, the fairy presses its cool brow to her burning one and asks, "how do you not regret this yet?"
Rosamund weakly brushes her fingertips along the fairy's cheek. "You're crying for me. How can I possibly regret being loved by you? I told you my love is greater than hardship."
"This is not how these stories go," the fairy argues.
"I'm human," Rosamund says with a cough. "I twisted it."
In one version of this world where the fairy said "yes" to Rosamund's proposal, she dies, and the fairy collects another regret.
In another version, it carries Rosamund home beneath the hill and heals her. Then, together, they make and raise a child.
And that child is deeply, unconditionally loved.
*slides this across the table* you're going to want to read this
There are Experiences behind this sign
My father is a classic layabout lazy bastard. He's the guy that people try to stereotype people on benefits as when they call them "dole bludgers". Sits in a filthy house all day whining that his wife won't clean it up, gets a great idea for a new business every few months and gives up after two weeks when it becomes clear that starting a business is hard, does everything he can to avoid doing a single scrap of work in life, uselessly drags his feet when the government forces him to actually do some.
Or at least, he was, until about three years ago, when he was sent off to do mandatory Work for the Dole at a volunteer organisation. He'd done a lot of Work for the Dole in the past, of course, and like most people who are forced to do a shitty job under the threat of starvation, was neither enthusiastic nor particularly useful. But in this particular place, he was given a job that he could do better than anyone else (he was one of 2 men working with a legion of elderly women, and the only person able to easily haul around the heavy goods that the organisation works with). He quickly found himself with a job he could understand, he could see the clear utility in, and that his coworkers greatly valued him for. He started arriving on time every day, putting in the effort, getting shit done. He started caring about the results. And when his Work for the Dole time was up, he kept volunteering.
He's one of two people paid to work in that warehouse now (the other person being the manager), and he's a lynchpin of activity there, their sole regular and reliable source of physical labour. When he takes holidays, they have to plan around it, because his consistent hard work has become such a critical asset to their work. And he's not taking nearly as many holidays as he should -- he works extra unpaid hours, lifts loads that are somewhat heavier than he should be lifting, shoulders the work of others when they need breaks, and we all have to urge him to take more days off for his health since he's not a young man any more. For my entire life this man has been a pile of old mud in the shape of a human, and the instant he found a job that fulfils his needs, he won't fucking stop. He's gonna die in that warehouse and die happy.
loudly going "YOU'RE GOOD YOU'RE GOOD" to myself to ward off the memory of every embarrassing thing i've ever done
I actually learned a fun therapy trick for this!
The statute of limitations on arson is 6 years.
So whenever I remember an embarrassing or shameful thing I’ve done, I ask myself if it was worse than arson. If it wasn’t, and it was 6 or more years ago, I forgive myself.
Also just the comedic shock of going “well, that was a stupid and mean thing I said, but 6 years is the statute of limitations on arson” helps.
real paramedic x golden retriever firefighter AU energy with this
alright I've got to do some quick math to explain attitudes towards AI to my boss.
we're looking to create an AI policy, and when we were talking about this, my boss (older millennial) was genuinely shocked to hear that younger people do not (seem) to view AI positively (a la the recent commencement speakers being booed)
please rb for larger sample size!
Question 1/3
What is your age, and do you feel AI is a net positive or net negative in our lives today?
under 18, AI is a net positive
under 18, AI is a net negative
18-29, AI is a net positive
18-29, AI is a net negative
30-45, AI is a net positive
30-45, AI is a net negative
46-60, AI is a net positive
46-60, AI is a net negative
over 60, AI is a net postive
over 60, AI is a net negative
Question 2/3
How often do you visit or interact with museums/archives (whether in person or online)?
Frequently (multiple times per month)
Often (multiple times per year)
Occasionally (a couple times per year)
Rarely (once every couple of years)
Never :(
Question 3/3
If you saw a museum was using AI in exhibits, marketing, research, etc., would you be more or less inclined to visit that museum?
under 18, more inclined
under 18, less inclined
18-29, more inclined
18-29, less inclined
30-45, more inclined
30-45, less inclined
46-60, more inclined
46-60, less inclined
over 60, more inclined
over 60, less inclined
Thank you for helping with this data collection. Please rb for as big a sample as possible!
🫶
i love gaboon vipers why do they move like that
me when im walking
@catadromously how could you leave this important comment in the tags etc.
That’s the truest thing about this creature that anyone has said, ever
this animal is so travel
This is actually such a crucial part of healing from neglect and abuse and I have to add to this.
Because indeed, people who like you will not roll their eyes and sigh at the idea of accommodating your needs, they will value your voice and be upset with you about injustice done to you, not at you for "being difficult". They will be happy when you find a way to live a better life, and help you to get there. If you are struggling, someone who loves you wants to see you smile, not tell you to smile because "you have it so good".
Even Darwin had his bad days.