Cosmic Funnies
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
occasionally subtle
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$LAYYYTER
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@kjistsehrtot
HOLY SHIT, IT WAS THE ORIGINAL ONE
MAKE A WISH
the first post ever on tumblr
I WAS EXPECTING IT TO BE A REMAKE OF SOME SORT HOLY FUCK
WHO THE FUCK KEEPS BRINGING THIS BACK
reblog this because it shows up every blue moon
I FOUND IT ✊
I WAS SO SCARED IT WOULDNT BE THE ORIGINAL
Who first posted this?
I’ve been seeing a lot of anti-Nazi ones, which is great, but I felt like we needed one to show our support for the Jewish community.
all you goyim I follow - I see you reblogging this and it warms me.
<3 HECK YES <3
everyone should feel safe on any blog uwu.
The Radioactive Man Who Returned To Fukushima To Feed The Animals That Everyone Else Left Behind
Naoto Matsumura is the only human brave enough to live in Fukushima’s 12.5-mile exclusion zone
He fled at first but returned to take care of the animals that were left behind
He returned for his own animals at first, but realized that so many more needed his help, too
Matsumura, who is 55 years old, knows that the radiation is harmful, but he “refuses to worry about it”
“They also told me that I wouldn’t get sick for 30 or 40 years. I’ll most likely be dead by then anyway, so I couldn’t care less”
Matsumura discovered that thousands of cows had died locked in barns
He also freed many animals that had been left chained up by their owners
Many of them now rely on him for food
The government has forbidden him from staying, but that doesn’t stop him either
He started in 2011 and is still going strong 4 years later
He relies solely on donations from supporters to work with and feed the animals
His supporters are calling him the ‘guardian of Fukushima’s animals’
The man clearly has a sense of humor as well
BOOST THIS LOVELY ANGEL
THIS IS THE CONTENT I SIGNED UP FOR
what a good day to remember that butch lesbians (ESPECIALLY trans, poc, and/or fat butch lesbians) aren’t fucking predatory
“trans butch lesbian”? More like heterosexual man.
Reblog the Fred of TERF banishment to keep your blog TERF free for a year.
HOLY SHIT, IT WAS THE ORIGINAL ONE
MAKE A WISH
the first post ever on tumblr
I WAS EXPECTING IT TO BE A REMAKE OF SOME SORT HOLY FUCK
WHO THE FUCK KEEPS BRINGING THIS BACK
reblog this because it shows up every blue moon
I FOUND IT ✊
I WAS SO SCARED IT WOULDNT BE THE ORIGINAL
Who first posted this?
Because abortions aren't the only way the patriarchy wants to control your junk
OBGYN: Yeah, you are exhibiting all the signs of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I’m so sorry.
Me: Huh? Oh, yeah. Insulin resistance, impossible weight loss, pre-disposition to type II diabetes, painful AF periods. Likelihood of bleed outs. Crap. That blows.
OBGYN: Yeah, well that too.
Me: *blinks* What?
OBGYN: Well, PCOS makes it very difficult for a woman to conceive and carry.
Me: BWHAHAHAHA. Yeah. No. No babies. Ever. Never wanted them. At all. Maternal instinct is not strong with this one. Only upside today.
OBGYN: Well then. Not exactly problem solved, but we’ll run with it.
Me: So about the MIND-SEARING PAIN and occasional HEAVY AF BLEEDING. When can we deal with that.
OBGYN: Not until you are 35.
Me: Dah fuq?
OBGYN: Not my rules. Hospitalization won’t even consider any treatment unless it’s life or death until you’re 35.
Me: Why?
OBGYN: Because you might want to have a baby.
Me: I’m 31. I didn’t want kids when I was 11, I didn’t want them at 21, and I sure as shit don’t want them now. Can’t I just sign a form that says “I don’t ever want a baby take it out, take it out now”?
OBGYN: Nope.
Me: Why?
OBGYN: Government rules. No removal of baby making parts before 35 unless your life is in immediate jeopardy.
TL;DR: The government knows better about your baby making parts than you do.
This is just evil. They are literally refusing to treat a potentially life-threatening condition, not just without the patient’s consent but despite the patient’s protest. Evil.
According to the National Women’s Health Network, there’s no legal age restriction- “Technically, any woman of legal age can consent to the procedure, but it should be medically justified. It’s incredibly unlikely that a doctor will perform a hysterectomy on women ages 18-35 unless it is absolutely necessary for their well-being and no other options will suffice.” Of course, this is in the US. Other countries may have different rules.
If you’re in the US and your OBGYN says “government says no,” look for a new one because they lied to you. If your OBGYN says that “hospital says no,” look for a new one because this one doesn’t respect your bodily autonomy. It is true that most surgeons don’t like to perform hysterectomies until you’re in your late 30s at the earliest, but a respectful surgeon will listen to their patient and not just write them off. Sexism in hospitals is alive and well- and it’s not just anecdotal evidence. There’s been a history of looking at it academically/professionally since the 70s (look into Mary Halas as a good place to start if you’re curious), and it crops up all the time in articles in the Journal of Women’s Health and Women’s Health Issues, and the International Journal of Women’s Health all of which are peer-reviewed, well-respected medical journals. It’s absolutely a real thing.
Anyways, I guess what I’m getting at is this: here’s a list of doctors (mostly US-centric) who perform different sterilization surgeries without giving their patients trouble. While even a surgeon on this list might caution anyone under 35 away from a hysterectomy, at the end of the day it’s your body and your pain. (And some of the docs here have been known to perform hysterectomies on people in their 20s with no fuss.) While this list won’t be practical for everyone- after all, medical treatment is ridiculously expensive in this country, it might help someone.
Holy shit fam Holy S H I T
SIGN ME THE FUCK UP I’VE BEEN TOLD THIS IS NOT ALLOWED FOR YEARS
Oh god
QUICK REMINDER THAT I HAD A HYSTERECTOMY A FEW DAYS AFTER MY 26TH BIRTHDAY B/C I HAD CANCER AND I DID EXACTLY THIS. I HAD A DOCTOR WHO DIDN’T WANT TO DO IT AND THEN I WENT TO A NEW DOCTOR AND AFTERWARDS SHE MORE OR LESS SAID MY LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN IN DANGER HAD I NOT DONE IT.
Sometimes it’s not the doctor, it’s the hospital. For example, my OBGYN worked at a Catholic hospital, so they couldn’t perform any type of sterilization onsite unless it was an emergency situation.
So if your doc feeds you this BS line about not being allowed to, ASK IF IT’S THE HOSPITAL POLICY. If it is, ask if they are able to perform the procedure elsewhere. If they are not, ASK FOR A REFERRAL.
I was 28 years old when my OBGYN explained that he wasn’t allowed to perform a sterilization procedure onsite, and then he proceeded to tell me what a crock of shit it was and referred me to someone else who was able to. And even though I was under 30, his referral listed me as “an ideal candidate” for the procedure.
If they pass off this line and insist when you know otherwise, FIND A NEW DOCTOR.
God help American women
I heard a surgical scrub tech yesterday say that her 15 year old’s innocence was deflowered (yes she used that word) because he literally met a bisexual person for the first time…
URGENT! If you're in Colorado, please, please be careful! If you know any trans men or transmasc people who might be in Colorado soon, please let them know about this. If you know any trans or LGBTQ+ groups, community centers, etc. in Colorado, make sure they're aware!
If you're cis, it's encouraged that you reblog this. Just spreading the word is a great opportunity to be an ally.
WTF
NOT KIDDING GUYS BE VERY CAREFUL HERE ARE SOME SCREENSHOTS OF CONVERSATIONS THIS DICK HAD WITH AN LGBT ACCT ON IINSTAGRAM
Be very very very very very careful my dudes and please stay safe
UPDATE:
This guy hellsing_ultimate700 deleted his account and started a new one under the name of axel_van_hellsing. Spread the word and stay safe!!!
I hate to reblog something like this onto a blog that’s supposed to be a safe space, but I want as many people to see it as possible
OP 9/26/19
!!!UPDATE!!!!
Now going by four_string_dude
Hey everyone, stop and think before you reblog this uncritically.
Are the first screenshots upsetting? Yes. Clearly hellsing_ultimate700 is a creep and a predator.
But “Axel Helmig” appears to be a random bassist in Germany who has never been to Colorado. The “four_strings_dude” Instagram account has been active for months, before those screenshots of “hellsing_ultimate700” were taken, and his account is used to like pictures of his German friends and family—no evidence that he’s ever followed or interacted with any of the trans man bodybuilding instagrams that the “hellsing_ultimate700” guy did.
Is there any reason AT ALL to believe that these accounts are in any way affiliated? I can’t find any. @bi-bii-biii do you have any evidence for why you believe they are the same person, other than having the same first name and might think a Bram Stoker character is cool?
The display photo for “hellsing_ultimate700” looks like this, and might be stolen in the first place:
While Axel the German bassist looks like this:
The first man lacks tattoos and seems to have a longer, older face with a wider septum and upturned lips, and has no shoulder tattoos. They don’t look like the same person to me. I think Axel Helmig/four_strings_dude is just some random guy whose face and name are now being dragged through the mud by panicking people.
In any case, as always, be careful who you sleep with, use protection, don’t trust strangers any further than you can throw them even if they are Your Type and say all the right things, get yourselves tested regularly, and don’t let stories of one predator turn you into another serophobic jerk peddling dangerous stereotypes about people with HIV.
Guys please spread only the original post and NOT the version adding this random German guy’s Instagram. It makes no sense that this could be the same person and there is no credible evidence that this guy is involved at all. They’re obviously not the same person! You’re stalking and harassing and calling for the death of a random guy who’s been misidentified based on a random tumblr user’s assumption. Stop! Think! Internet vigilantism can easily victimize innocent people! It doesn’t help to spread misinformation!
So I just got this message literally few minutes ago
And if YOU get this message in the future DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE CLINK ON THE LINK I FUCKING SWEAR TO GOD I WILL CUT YOUR HANDS OFF
A warning to all of my followers there no such a thing as @exposingthoselosers I just thought any form of information is good and can protect my followers from getting their phone or any other devices hacked if you’re connect to the wifi they might hack all of the devices connected.
DO NOT FUCKING CLICK ON ANU LINK YOU GET NOT EVEN FROM UR FRIENDS ON TUMBLR BECAUSE THEY COULD GET HACKED 👀
Pls share this awareness ⚠
Also blogs get hacked or something and send these without the blog owner’s consent. I got this message and then afterwards the person who sent it to me said they didn’t send that.
got a message from a mutual today similar to this and they later messaged me to say it wasn’t them so yeah be careful
Basically if you get this message, don’t click on it, instead tell the person that you received that message. That way they know that they were hacked.
If I ever send you any message, especially if it has a link, message me back about the message before you click on the link. I will understand because things like this^^ can happen.
Guuuuys. I’ve received this
I’ve checked with the person running the account and it was a virus. Sooo… Be careful
I just got a message like this and thought it sounded familiar. Be careful everyone!
Yeah hey followers I do NOT go around randomly sending links, so if you get something like this from me, let me know because I did NOT send it.
I don’t talk to you unless we’re good good mutuals or you’re my girlfriend so chances are it’s probably not me!
A hummingbird’s tongue is so long that it curls up into its skull and around its eyes when not in use.
(Source, Source 2, Source 3)
jesus fucking christ.
THIS IS ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT
my mom was 17 and my dad was 27 when they got together and they’re still together now after almost 40 years and they love their life and raised me and my sister in the best way ever!
and my whole life my parents told me that my mom was very mature and my dad even says that he never felt as sure of a relationship, he knew he could trust my mom and he asked her for advice and he treated her with the utmost respect. mom always says they were deeply in love and she had never wanted ANYONE before my dad but he just stole her heart since they were so in harmony together.
IT DEPENDS, NOT ALL TEENS CAN SUSTAIN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A MUCH OLDER MAN BUT SOME CAN!
no
no
no
nonononono oh my fucking god
no
For starters, I’m happy your mom and dad and you and your sister are happy, that’s fantastic, I’m glad it worked out.
but this is seriously fucked up
GROWN-ASS MEN. SHOULD NOT. BE ATTRACTED. TO TEENAGERS. NO. NO. NO.
I’m a 17 year old dude and I physically can not be attracted to someone more than a year younger than me, because they are immature, they just are, no matter how ‘mature’ they are, they. are. fucking. CHILDREN. I AM A CHILD. I have changed so, so much since just last year, and I know I will change even more this year. Teenagers ARE CHILDREN. They are STILL going through puberty, they are still growing, their minds are NOT adult yet. Even if they are 18, they’re still trying to find their way in the world and their brains STILL AREN’T MATURED. You ask ANY 30+ year old about their 18 year old selves and 99% of them will say how naive they were or how they wouldn’t make the same choices they made then, now.
The fact that your mom ACTED mature as a kid and had her head screwed on straight is great, but that makes it even worse to think that she could handle that kind of relationship. That’s like saying the 12 year olds that are super precocious and intelligent are ready for a relationship, just because they’re ~so mature.~
What if she was 16. What if she was 15. What if she was 14. What if, what if. She’s still mature for her age, right? What makes those ages any less okay?
NO 27 YEAR OLD GUY SHOULD BE ATTRACTED TO A FUCKING MINOR. NO 27 YEAR OLD GUY SHOULD WANT TO DATE A MINOR. NO 27 YEAR OLD GUY SHOULD ACT ON THOSE URGES. BECAUSE YOUNG GIRLS ARE RAISED TO BE INSECURE AND HAVING A MATURE MAN TELL THEM THAT THEY’RE DESIRABLE IS A HUGE CONFIDENCE BOOST AND IS MANIPULATION WHETHER THEY KNOW IT OR NOT.
It is an adult’s RESPONSIBILITY to say no. If a minor likes them, or if they happen to develop feelings, even if they shouldn’t. Just don’t act on them. It is very, very easily to not act on feelings. It is your job to not be a creep and take advantage of a naive child.
IT IS NEVER OKAY FOR ANYONE TO DATE/COURT/INTERACT WITH A MINOR IN ANY SEXUAL OR ROMANTIC WAY. EVEN IF THEY HAVE ~NO BAD INTENTIONS.~ IT’S MANIPULATIVE AND A BIG SHIFT OF POWER EVEN IF IT’S ~EVEN~ AND IT’S SO SO SO CREEPY.
PLEASE DON’T PUT THIS OUT THERE FOR YOUNG GIRLS, OR BOYS, OR NON-BINARY KIDS TO SEE.
Because it is. not. okay. Even if it does work out eventually, it shouldn’t have happened in the first place.
After my parents broke up, my dad, 33 yo, went into a relationship with a 18 yo. They’re still together to this day, had two beautiful children, and I’m sure if my half siblings saw this post they would have commented the same as the first commenter. Because they’re the relationship’s children, and because they’re hidden things a lot. Because I eavedrop a lot, I can tell you that this loving, perfect, romantic relationship is fucked up to the core. Because I needed to reach 33 yo myself to be fully aware how fucked up it was.
My dad didn’t want to get into a relationship with an adult, and made an exception for my step mother because she was “so mature”. He wanted a teen. Specifically a teen. He only dated teens. So he could raise them into the wife he wanted. It was totally calculated.
This is why they’re still together this day. She dress like he wants, lost weight like he wanted, She became as racist and conservative as him. She does all the houses chores, sometimes even late at night, while he watches tv, like he wanted, and then tells everyone around him she’s a clean freak and makes fun of her. He forced her to get an abortion, for a child she wanted. She still talks about it. She never forgot, never forgave him. And still, she stayed. Because she has no prior experience, and has no idea how bad their relationship is.
When an adult say that a teen is “mature” enough for a realtionship with him, he means she’s submissive. He means she listens to him and is easily convinced by his opinion. He means she’s calm and easy to deal with.
When an adult is attracted to a teen, they’re attracted to their own dominant position in the relationship. A teen doesn’t know what they want in life. So they’re no conflict : the adult convince her that she wants what he wants. An adult is not attracted to a teen despite her age. He’s attracted to her because of it. A mature teen is not an adult. It’ something else, and no adult should date them.
Read this until you can say it in your sleep
How to tape up your hands before a fight
Useful reference?
Let’s go beat someone up! But no seriously, does this prevent pain or something ? What do these bandages actually serve ?
It keeps your bones aligned to prevent injury, compresses soft tissue to make the fist more rigid, and pads the knuckles. Skull bones are sturdier than hand bones, and even if you know what you’re doing there’s a high risk of damaging your metacarpals if you punch someone barehanded. It’s why they recommend if you find yourself in a fight unprepared to bunt their nose with the butt of your palm, because if the other person tucks their head and you end up hitting their forehead instead it’ll do a lot less damage to your palm than your knuckles.
Tumblr teach’n you how to fucks someone’s shit up.
Tip: if you actually use this regularly (in boxing, martial arts etc) but you’re not a pro, don’t go through your fingers! Beginner’s hands are not used to being separated like that. I started boxing and used a similar method to this, but it completely fucked up my hands. Make sure it’s supporting your wrist and knuckles, and it’s wrapped around your thumb, but not like this. Unless, of course, your hands are used to it
The internet reacts to Ash Ketchum’s Pokémon Leauge Win! 🏆
On Dentists
So I can’t brush my teeth. Like, it’s the worst kind of hell. I went to the dentist for a cleaning today and I told the hygienist this, and she was wonderfully helpful.
There are some incredibly soft toothbrushes available- namely, post-surgical brushes. Running them under hot water makes them even softer.
She told me that you don’t really need to use toothpaste- it’s mostly marketing. The foam gets to me, so that is really reassuring.
She gave me two particularly soft brushes and some xylitol gum. Trident is a market brand of xylitol gum, which helps with your teeth and can make your breath smell better.
The whole purpose of brushing is to disrupt plaque buildup. You don’t need to brush twice a day, every day with toothpaste if you brush correctly- little circles, focusing on near the gums (where most plaque builds up). So if you’re having a bad sensory day and can’t brush at all, it’s not the end of the world.
Hell, you don’t even need a toothbrush if even the post-surgical ones are too harsh. Going over your teeth with the same motions using a washcloth is enough.
She wants to find a fluoride rinse that has a taste I can stand (peppermint is the only mint I can stand) but she’s not particularly worried about it.
I go to Dr. Barr in Chicago. If you can get to the State St. Macy’s, his office is nearby. He’s very kind and patient and really understanding of my needs as an autistic person. The hygienist, I don’t know her name, announced everything she was going to do before she did it, and stopped frequently to see how I was doing.
This is really the only positive dentist I’ve ever had- past dentists have been too rough and not bothered to help find ways I can actually brush.
Basically this is a glowing recommendation for Dr. Barr’s office if you’re autistic, afraid of dentists, or have sensory needs. This is a recommendation even if you don’t have any of those things.
Im actually crying i feel like this post was reblogged for me oh my god oh my god oh my lord thank you
You can also dilute your mouthwash and use it to swish around if it burns. My dentist does this so consider it dentally approved
If you were feeling guilty about your brushing habits, either due to sensory issues, pain, allergies, executive dysfunction, or just plain fatigue, here’s what you need to know about what is and isn’t necessary if your dental care!
I have an eating disorder and I can’t stand the taste of toothpaste. This makes me feel so much better.
we all know about anon1449’s trans rights herobrine (with better pants) but we never talk about these absolute gems
(source)
Unsplash - photography, illustration, and art
Pixabay - same as unsplash
Pexels - stock photos and videos
Stockvault.net - stock photos
freepngimg - icons, pictures and clipart
Veceezy - vectors and clipart
Kissclipart and kissPNG - more vectors and clipart (often transparent!)
Getdrawings - simplistic images and drawing tutorials
Gumroad - photoshop brushes (and more)
Canva - needs login but has lots of templates
Library of Congress - historical posters and photos
NASA - you guessed it
Creative Commons - all kinds of stuff, homie
Even Adobe has some free images
There are so many ways to make moodboards, bookcovers, and icons without infringing copyright! As artists, authors, and other creatives, we need to be especially careful not to use someone else’s work and pass it off as our own.
Please add on if you know any more sites for free images <3
