joi @koioll - Tumblr Blog

voldemo

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian

voldemo

its like ive never seen herbivore

ezekestiel

i sighed so loud my mom asked me if i was okay and she’s two rooms away

hobbyhorsing

A little less conversation and a little more touch my body

insaneinthearazometrain

we're eating bullshit today which means that water is wet. good luck figuring out the rest of my phillosophy

lakevida

two full years ive spoken to this coworker and i didnt know she had horses until today how do you go a single conversation without bringing up your horses that would take unimaginable restraint on my part and ive never even wanted a horse. i see a rabbit in the garden that frequently has rabbits and thats the first thing i have say to everyone all morning

etcstims

little snakes sips | source

polari

just got a call from the american psychiatric association. you old dogs, i said, picking up on the first ring. how many times i gotta tell you to lose this number. i don’t want you coming around here anymore. “listen, toots, we’ve been doing some thinking,” they says, and i says, guess there’s a first time for everything. “you’re a real funny dame, sugardoll. reviewing criticism, we’ve determined that the biggest issue with our previous diagnostic and statistic manuals of mental disorders is the anonymity of it all. we’ve been circling around a vague figure of the mentally well without defining the traits of a mentally well person. there’s no personality. what we need is a cute broad with a couple opinions to model the psychological norm.” so i’m saying back up and give it to me straight: i’m the new standard of sanity? can i get that in writing? and they say, “as the american psychiatric association we hereby state that you are the baseline and any deviations from your personality are deviations from the very concept of sanity, at least in the united states psychiatric system.” they’re making it public tomorrow. it’s a nice gig, if you really want to know. never thought they’d let a woman do it.

crplpunkklavier

we bought a shirt at a thrift store that says "best mom in louisiana" for some reason (as a reminder we are in midwest germany) and now my spouse keeps walking around the house wearing it and saying shit like "WHO STANDS BEFORE THE GREATEST MOM OF LOUISIANA?"

shranstan

Reading any historical fiction and non-fiction set in I century B.C.E. and Cicero my friend Cicero is always there <3 #mycicero

itsapmseymour

Still wrapping my head around the fact the phrase "Hold Your Horses" is a play on the word Stable...

To be stable.

zzoupz

actuallyapathy

obsessed w how none of these are the real origin of the phrase

swanpaw

daggersoliloquy

hey don't cry. on december 3, 1926, agatha christie went missing for eleven days and because the uk police didn't know what to do they recruited sir arthur conan doyle, creator of master detective sherlock holmes, but all he did was conduct a séance to try and contact her distressed spirit