The Female Version of an Asshole.

KQ. Drinker with a writing problem. I say "fight me" a lot for someone who would cry if it happened. [Love&Rockets]

[hydro-homies]

POKÉMON FACT

[pyr0rose]

I- I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THAT

[brunhiddensmusings]

if you as a father dont think your kid working with robots is cool as all fuck then you not only failed as a father but you failed at understanding what awesome is

[politicalmachine]

[nadiaoxford]

I don’t have a hard time believing this.

[thorffour-deactivated20190920]

[throughablogdarkly]

Crows are smart as fuck I don’t even begin to doubt the veracity of these stories

[aechlys]

A crow perched on a shrine boarder bowed back to me once while I was living in Japan. I was in laughing hysterics and a bit freaked out all the rest of the way home. Crows are fantastic and terrifying.

[boredpanda]

Rare Kitten Born With ‘Two Faces’ Grows Up Into The Most Beautiful Cat Ever

[siriuslydandy]

[pondnaravit]

[myeclecticdream09]

[thou-creature-of-the-deep]

[cubanpercy]

[what-a-catch-donkey-deactivated]

[lotrlocked]

[rinasaurusrex]

[valtsv]

a villain who commits crimes because they want to impress the hero and get their attention but they don't know how to flirt like a regular person

[c3rvida3]

Podcast where every week someone different interviews me, and if they ask something I've answered before, they get Nickelodeon slimed, so episode one is like, "Where are you from? What's your favorite color?" but episode one-hundred is like, "How many birds would you estimate you saw on the family vacation to Yellowstone you took when you were seven?" and they still get slimed.

[c3rvida3]

This post is only mildly funny by virtue of the fact that it takes place in a world where I'm capable of answering questions.

[andkool]

The one directly under her is like “she made me first”

[jonbutter]

when ur scrollin thru tumblr while eating lunch and porn comes up

[catchymemes]

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[ducktracy-deactivated20260315]

—————

BEST CARTOON DRINKING SOUND EFFECT I HAVE EVER HEARD

[dank-morpork]

I REMEBERED EVERY SINGLE SOUND AND MUSICAL NOTE BEFORE I HIT UNMUTE I FELT IT IN MY BONES

[nerdgul]

Ohh yall all hate vore until the little pink orb dose it… i see how it is

[lizilla]

Shut up shut up shut up please shut up

[bisexualwario]

this is 100% why i never fucked with that “normcore” nonsense and why i’m still extremely self-conscious about what i wear and how my clothes fit, even after my weight loss. wearing “normal” clothes only becomes “fashion” when it’s on skinny attractive people and once it’s on a fat person it’s suddenly the trappings of the tacky and the unwashed poors. fuck out of here. you can make anything look good.

[3rdheart]

Fred Rogers Acceptance Speech - 1997

[bustedbitmap]

[portalgifs]

NO BUT YOU ALL NEED TO UNDERSTAND HOW FUNNY THIS IS THEYRE LITERALLY FILLING A ROBOT WITH BULLETS, LIKE BULLETS THAT YOU FIRE FROM A GUN. NOW NORMALLY FIRING A GUN TRIGGERS THE BULLET TO EXPLODE CREATING A PRESSURE THAT CAUSES THE TIP OF THE BULLET TO BE FORCED OUT OF THE BARREL AT A HIGH SPEED. 

WHaT CAVE JOHNSON’S TURRET’S DO IS LOAD A TON OF FUCKING BULLETS INTO THE CASE OF THE SENTRY LIKE IT”S A GODDAMN GUMBALL MACHINE AND THEN USE A FUcKIN SPRING LOADED PISTON TO FIRE IT THAT IS SO UNNECESSARY AND INEFFECTIVE LIKE NO WONDER CHELL CAN RESIST SO MANY BULLETS THE LIKELIHOOD ITD CAUSE ANYTHING MORE THAN A BAD BRUISE IS LIKE ONE IN A HUNDRED

[monasticmaestoso]

but it’s 65% more bullet per bullet

[ryanccole]

Wait a second are you telling me

that Portal is such a perfect goddamn game that they even have an explanation for why a video game protagonist can withstand being shot multiple times??????????

[diocletianscabbagefarm]

They also have an empathy generator immediately followed by an empathy suppressor I love portal

[uguuuchan]

gimme sammich

[princesstigerbelle]

gib bagul