Cosmic Funnies
tannertan36
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Peter Solarz
Kiana Khansmith
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shark vs the universe
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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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Show & Tell
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@kryptonian-earthling
“I know a lot of people seem to think this stuff tastes great, but I’m seriously thinking it’s being overhyped here,” Kon said to the random person who’d unfortunately had the luck of being beside him at that very moment. “Seriously, does any alcohol taste good?” Rhetorical question. He was more than certain the answer was no.
Wally tugged at the collar of his shirt for the fifth time in less than 10 minutes. Honestly, how did men wear ties and bowties for this long and not feel stifled? He felt like he was going to melt or choke.
Neither sounded very appealing.
“Geez, you’d think they’d wanna get on with the main event already…” With a huff, Wally slid onto a barstool and waved the bartender over.
“Something with bourbon, please” he idly tapped hid fingers on the bar until he had his drink in hand, gaze scanning the crowd in boredom from where he hunched against the bar.
Kon smirked at Wally’s antics and slid onto the barstool next to him. “What’s the rush? You got somewhere to be?” The implication was of course, that he had somewhere to be that was ‘better’ than this event. He could tell that the posh extravegance was not endearing Wally in the least, but he was course was to needle him about it anyways.
“I’ll have your fruitiest and most nonsensically colourful drink please,” he smiled to the bartender, then turned and winked at Wally, teasing him more.
“Dude, nice hair.” Steph sidled up to Kon, holding two flutes of champagne. “Really suits your vibe, though for the record, I think you should do, like, a fiery orange next.” She grinned and offered him one of the glasses. “How’s your instagram-posting-reporting stuff going? You know we’ve got to get a group pic sometime tonight. You, me, Cass, Wally, whoever else we can drag into it. Maybe Bruce,” Steph snorted, and it rolled into a full-on laugh. “I will literally pay you if you can get him to do that with us tonight.” closed starter for @kryptonian-earthling
“Thanks,” Kon smirked, taking a flute from her and clinking theirs together before taking a sip. “Red, the pink, than orange. Don’t you think I should try for a cool colour instead to even it out?” He was just teasing mostly, he liked her idea a lot. “Instagram is doing great! It’s honestly awesome to be able to post selfies and get paid for it. Wouldn’t recommend dragging you guys in though. Too many people see my stuff that it’s hard to keep my on you-know-what on the down low. If people start seeing group pics, they might start to connect the dots.” An unfortunate reality to his gig that he’s sadly had to think over too many times. Instagram was work, so that meant he did actually have to use his brain and be careful about it. He considered the idea of a gimmick with Bruce though. He was at this event, so it could just be seen as a harmless one-off. “Might be fun to try and catch Bruce with a selfie though,” he smiled.
Okay, she had seen in his new hair on Twitter and Tiktok but she couldn’t help but gasped seeing it in person. “ Kon! So pretty. “ She had unconsciously twirled his hair and wondered if she could pull color in it. She decided she couldn’t.
Of course, she had been wanting catch up with him. “ Anyway, how are you? “
closed starter for @kryptonian-earthling
Kon grinned appreciatively and straightened his jacket. “Thanks Cass,” he looked around quickly to check there was no one in earshot, then leaned down as whispered, “programming the illusion particles to get this specific colour took me hours, but ya boy did it.” He leaned back and chuckled. “I’m pretty well by the way. And you look quite stunning yourself. I’d ask you for a dance, but I don’t think that’s how these things work.”
@spoilers-ahead-647
Contiued from here
He’d never went rock climbing before, Had never even thought about it, for obvious reasons. But eve ol’ Clark had done it before, and it was a normal human activity he had yet to experiences. Plus with Steph offering so generously, it’d have felt wrong to pass it up. “Will do! Catch ya then!” He returned with a two fingered salute, not being able to resist the urge to throw in another pun This was going to be interesting. Later that week, at the rock climb.... “I don’t wanna be *that guy*, but this harness is strangling me in all the worst places.” Probably most due to the fact that he wasn’t even *on* the wall at this point, and instead was just dangling from the cord next to it, but details details...
continued from here
Kon grinned back irrepetantly and continued scaling upwards with the ease of a seasoned veteran despite his absolute abysmal adherence to the three hold rule. Steph still won their little game though and Kon shrugged indifferently before letting himself get let back down. “Not in public its not,” Kon teased back with a smirk. “But no probs. This was fun, even though I’m pretty sure the rope guys would beg to differ.”
DIPLOMACY AND DILIGANCE: ft. INSTAGRAM MODEL CONNER KENT
Only like two months after he’d “established” himself on Instagram and he was already getting invited to the big events. Kon may not be the smartest cookie in the jar, but he knew this was definitely thanks to the meddling of the Batman. He wasn’t sure whether he should be grateful or not. Cause on the one hand, exposure and a fancy dinner and a party - all good stuff he’d been really curious about for months now. But on the other hand, since this was from the old Bat, that meant all the fun stuff came attached with responsibilities. Yuck.
What was the grumpy old man expecting to happen at this thing anyways? Another explosive robbery like that Met Gala where Clark lost his powers? Kon did not like the idea of that. Just the idea of not being able to be his full awesomeness sucked. So he was on the fence even as he flexed his new income to get something nice and fancy for the event - there was no question that he was going, he had to no matter which side he ultimately landed on, but his feelings about it? Well, that’ll have to be a work in progress for now.
Conner’s civvies look now includes pink hair ^^
@owracle continued from here
Kon chuckled and shrugged. “Heh yeah. It really is.” His brain was specifically programmed to think a certain way, and breaking away from it all was a lot more of a nuanced process than he’d thought. Than even Dubillex had thought. “I guess I learned that even though I’m out, I wasn’t as independent as I thought I was,” he answered sincerely. “But I see that now and I’m thinking that maybe it’s time I really broke off and explored the world for my own you know?” He smiled a Barbara then chuckled with mild sheepishness. “Sorry, I know this wasn’t what you had in mind when you asked me how I was.”
@spoilers-ahead-647
Contiued from here
He’d never went rock climbing before, Had never even thought about it, for obvious reasons. But eve ol’ Clark had done it before, and it was a normal human activity he had yet to experiences. Plus with Steph offering so generously, it’d have felt wrong to pass it up. “Will do! Catch ya then!” He returned with a two fingered salute, not being able to resist the urge to throw in another pun This was going to be interesting. Later that week, at the rock climb…. “I don’t wanna be *that guy*, but this harness is strangling me in all the worst places.” Probably most due to the fact that he wasn’t even *on* the wall at this point, and instead was just dangling from the cord next to it, but details details…
Steph had been focused on getting to the top of the wall as fast she she possibly could, and was doing pretty good, she thought. But when she heard Kon she stopped climbing and looked over only to burst out laughing, entirely breaking her rhythm.
“How did you even…” she let the question trail off into more laughter and shifted her grip so that she could pull out her phone, safely zipped in her pocket. “Smile. Oh my god, Cass and Tim have to see this.” She took several photos, the last one a selfie with both of them in it, before tucking her phone away.
“Do you need help?” she said, “because I’m not sure how to help you out here. You might be on your own with this one,” but she started to edge her way over towards him anyways, still snickering.
Yeah, she was definitely posting those pictures to snapchat after this.
Kon rolled his eyes but did a lazy rock and roll finger gesture as he half assed “pose” for the camera. Couldn’t really actually pose there, swinging on the cord, but eh. It’d have been easy to just fix his situation by floating, but they were in public, and secret identities yada yada yada. He he just grumbled and reached for on of the blocky grippy things on the again, pulling himself back up ease. To be honest, he’d only let himself fall in the first place for the lols. This was too easy so he needed to spice things up a bit. He “climbed” to the top and grinned at Steph, then, with a devilish grin on his face, swung sideways and bumped her with his hip, earning him a disapproving yell from his burleigh instructor. Kon was completely unapologetic though.
Continued from here
“Something’s off?” Kon had not noticed that something was off, but he also barely knew the guy. “I was wondering if joining a team was all we can do, but you’re saying the team might also be a problem?” He huffed and sighed and flopped back in his seat. Why was everything so god dang complicated?
“This blows,” he gruffed, sinking further in his seat. “All these powers and we’re still just sitting ducks.” He looked wearily over his nose at Wally as he continued sliding downwards, “Maybe we should just pick up a few sign posts and go join the protests.”
“Don’t put words in my mouth, Kon.” He rolled his eyes a little, huffing but still tapping his fingers on the table with a lazy air, “The team isn’t the problem. It might cause a bit of friction, but that’ll happen regardless. Half of us don’t know each other and I’m sure most of us are awkward or have issues. But if we don’t try, we can’t say we didn’t give it a chance.” His gaze looks hazy with thought.
“I’m just not sure it’s enough. Or if doing this is too little, too late. Plus i’m a little paranoid, what with all this distrust from the general population over us now. The government wants to keep us on a leash- and I’m not okay with that.”
Extending a leg casually,Wally nudged the tip of a sneaker against Kon’s slouched leg with a smirk.
“You wanna go streak naked flying through Central Park with a sign that says ‘FUCK THE GOVERNMENT’; be my guest- but I’m neither explaining nor helping bail you out when Supes finds out.”
“Well then make more sense man, I ain’t no telepath.” He propped his jaw onto his hand again and pointed took another long slurp from his overly sweetend drink. But then the explanation came and...nope, he still didn’t get it. “So are you saying join the Team or don’t join the team? I’m getting mixed messages here.”
He didn’t share Wally’s paranoia, but his point about forming a team being too little too late worried him slightly. “Guess maybe we’ll just have to try to find out if we’re wasting our time? I dunno, maybe actively wasting our time instead of passively wasting our time will be better.” At the nudge at his leg and the teasing, Kon narrowed his eyes at Wally, unimpressed. “*Dude*, that is like, *not* how protests works.” Right? People didn’t do that to protest did they? He hoped not. “Besides, Kal would be proud of me just for trying.” Again, he *thinks.*
@spoilers-ahead-647
Contiued from here
He’d never went rock climbing before, Had never even thought about it, for obvious reasons. But eve ol’ Clark had done it before, and it was a normal human activity he had yet to experiences. Plus with Steph offering so generously, it’d have felt wrong to pass it up. “Will do! Catch ya then!” He returned with a two fingered salute, not being able to resist the urge to throw in another pun This was going to be interesting. Later that week, at the rock climb.... “I don’t wanna be *that guy*, but this harness is strangling me in all the worst places.” Probably most due to the fact that he wasn’t even *on* the wall at this point, and instead was just dangling from the cord next to it, but details details...
Send ✿ for a happy memory.
When he first moved in with Lois and Clark. That was...that moment had made his heart swell with warmth he hadn’t realized he could feel. Kon hadn’t been able to move for a moment there, standing in the doorway and looking around, unable to believe it was all real. But was and he couldn’t be happier. That was the first time he really believed that he could maybe be part of a real family.
i am beyoncé always.
Kon squinted at the other costumed vigilante and folded his arms. “No, Beyoncé is Beyoncé always. You’re just,” he waved about her over getup and person randomly. “Sorry, what’s your name again?” There were soooo many Spider people around ha couldn’t keet track, and he didn’t have the familial incentive to do so like he did with the bajillion members of the Bat clan. He was fairly sure this one was Sipder-Woman, but could he be sure? Really really sure?
ADKAJGDSJK JDHALDJA
SKLKHHA–
I’m sorry
Continued from here
“Something’s off?” Kon had not noticed that something was off, but he also barely knew the guy. “I was wondering if joining a team was all we can do, but you’re saying the team might also be a problem?” He huffed and sighed and flopped back in his seat. Why was everything so god dang complicated?
“This blows,” he gruffed, sinking further in his seat. “All these powers and we’re still just sitting ducks.” He looked wearily over his nose at Wally as he continued sliding downwards, “Maybe we should just pick up a few sign posts and go join the protests.”
“Don’t put words in my mouth, Kon.” He rolled his eyes a little, huffing but still tapping his fingers on the table with a lazy air, “The team isn’t the problem. It might cause a bit of friction, but that’ll happen regardless. Half of us don’t know each other and I’m sure most of us are awkward or have issues. But if we don’t try, we can’t say we didn’t give it a chance.” His gaze looks hazy with thought.
“I’m just not sure it’s enough. Or if doing this is too little, too late. Plus i’m a little paranoid, what with all this distrust from the general population over us now. The government wants to keep us on a leash- and I’m not okay with that.”
Extending a leg casually,Wally nudged the tip of a sneaker against Kon’s slouched leg with a smirk.
“You wanna go streak naked flying through Central Park with a sign that says ‘FUCK THE GOVERNMENT’; be my guest- but I’m neither explaining nor helping bail you out when Supes finds out.”
The Metropolis Kid
