Ye Olde call-out poste for Sir Lancelot
He ignored Galehaut after two years.
He Ignored Gawain after one.
He Ignored Percival after a month.
He Ignored Mordred after a week.
He ignored Galahad from the start. Okay, that one’s fair.
Sang about how great he is for four minutes.
Freed a Kingdom, took the name of a previous king who was never properly buried, claimed the castle as his own, renamed it “Joyous Guard,” then abandoned it the next day to raiders.
Re-conquered it, renamed it to “Dolorous Guard” a year or two later.
Slept with the wives of his best friends. More than once.
Tried to sleep with the Lady of Shallot. She was dead.
Gave Arthur a three-day long speech about how horrible it is for Arthur to have an illegitimate son, and how great it is that he, Lancelot, has no children, despite having his own bastard child.
Claimed that Galahad was born because Elaine of Corbenic had put him under a love spell, so therefore he didn’t have to pay child support.
Caused the schism in Camelot, leading to its destruction.
Overall a pretty terrible father and womanizer.
Also:
Ultimately, he’s a poor re-interpretation of Dairmuid the Boar
