axolittle, axolottle

whomst'd've'ly'yaint'nt'ed'ies's'y'ai'ng'ngah yog-sothoth h'ee-l'geb f'ai throdog uaaah

[delicatesquashblossom]

Ask not for whom the gurdy hurds. It hurds for thee.

[pocketss]

goodbye boy

[hellenhighwater]

I forgot to eat dinner so I'm having 11 pm corn on the cob. This counts as a meal

... It's possible that I really need to do some grocery shopping

[hellenhighwater]

Okay for those of you living in pitiful ignorance, take a raw ear of corn with the husk on and cut all the way around the base (as pictured: above the point where the husk meets the cob, so that the entire husk is severed but still wrapped around the corn. Do not cut through the cob.) Then, with the husk still on, microwave it for 5-7 minutes. It'll basically steam it inside the husk. Remove from microwave --it will be hot, so use a mitt or a towel--and firmly pull the top of the husk/silk, which should come off easily in one piece, unsheathing a flawless corn on the cob. If it doesn't, you probably need to cut a little higher around the base, so all the leaves are severed. No picking off silk!

[hellenhighwater]

For the nonbelievers (and for me, a second corn)

[hellenhighwater]

This website works so well

[joshlovesyou]

[salmonballer]

a masterlock? bro you are practically free-use

[pancakeke]

*bashes it with another master lock*

[ashenmind]

[stunningpicture]

Lobster in a bucket looks like a gigantic monster on a metallic planet, and the waterdrops look like stars.

[tainbocuailnge]

forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware

[tainbocuailnge]

to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day

[augustdementhe]

I just need a good pot, a good wok, TWO paring knives, TWO steak knives, and one Santoku style choppitychoppity.

That’s IT.

I ask for SO LITTLE.

[rionsanura]

Very helpfully, there is someone keeping track of which high-quality kitchenware has been enshittified and which hasn’t.

https://ledger.worseonpurpose.com/

[augustdementhe]

Oh HELL yes.

[prokopetz]

I've joked in the past about how I want an Arthurian adaptation set in one of those bits of the Middle Ages where nobody has any working infrastructure and all the kings and lords are flag broke but they're still trying to make it work, but it occurs to me that a high fantasy version would also be kind of awesome. The High King in his grand palace (shitty hill fort) sending his Holy Knights (a dozen guys and a donkey) on a perilous journey (a half-day's march) to face the Dread Necromancer's undead scourge (exactly six zombies). The Necromancer's immortal death-knight champion (a skeleton in a hat) comes out to meet them astride a terrible hornèd beast (a reanimated cow because they couldn't find a dead horse).

[pocketss]

It was important to me that she puts emphasis on the TOK

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

[whencircuitsshort]

why do people need to be domesticated animals for petplay,. u r my lion i bought you illegallu and you are trying to kill me. go

[nobrashfestivity]

John C Adams, Meteoric Shower as Seen off Cape Florida, 1891

[perriaeyjeve]

[trans-yllz]

I think a pet deposit is stupid but at least its a stupid I can understand you know. like sure a pet could cause more damage so extra "in case of damage" money is owed. whatever. at least I have a chance of getting it back. but pet rent is bonkers crazy. like no the amount of rent thats due is what the rent is. my cat isn't like raising property tax. normal rent isn't even calculated by number of people living in the house. you can't raise the rent when an extra person moves in. what. "pet rent". what the hell are you talking about. you sound insane. its a bunny rabbit

[crocodile-dandy]

I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife! That’s right, he took his hedgehog-fuckin’ quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was “this big,” and I said “that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you’ve got a small dick, It’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like! That’s right, baby, tall points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked my wife, so guess what, I’m gonna fuck the Earth! That’s right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not gonna piss on the Earth, I’m gonna go higher!! I’m pissing ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!

[rowanisawriter]

imo the pov character should be lying to themselves and concealing shit from themselves constantly

[unyieldingsilence]

‎ ‎

[rowanisawriter]

exactly, bestie. Exactly

[spelldealer]

whoops i forgot to do everything in the world