Does my impending sense of doom turn you on

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@laudatenium
Does my impending sense of doom turn you on
(Comes back from the evil sorceress’s tower covered in suspiciously placed bruises and poorly hidden hickeys) Uh Yeah Uhm she was torturing me Haha don’t worry abt it. By the way have you guys ever considered joining Her Dark Army
“Home is where the trees look normal” is the sweetest, saddest, most nostalgic truth I’ve ever heard.
gonna be honest i don’t know how many more ‘enter the 6 digit code we sent to your phone’s i got left in me
im so fucking stubborn
michael what the fuck.
no its one of my fancy pencils :)
the end cap comes off :)
oh lard
my son he is sick he has every disease
we are nearing peak deviancy
happy back-to-school day
im so clever that its sickening
if i breathe wrong i'll lose him
it got too small for the clip. luckily i realized this eraser has the perfect holes
at what point does this stop being a pencil
Tags via @mik-mania
Calling the emergency order a direct response to “an imminent national threat,” Italian Prime Minister Giorgia Meloni issued a travel ban Wednesday restricting the entry of Italian Americans into the country. “Effective immediately, the Italian Republic will no longer allow Italian Americans who believe themselves to be our ‘paisanos’ to set foot on our land,” Meloni said of the blanket policy passed unanimously by Parliament, which would close the European state’s borders to any U.S. resident claiming to have as little as one-eighth “Italian blood.”
Full Story
I bet there's at least one guy who uses a wheelchair who became a sneakerhead just for the laughs. Wearing pristine bright white brand shoes like "if you let your shoes touch the ground you're a bitch. If you keep them on display and never wear them, you're a coward. I'm the only one doing this correctly. Fuck you, get on my level."
simply cannot ever resist what i call the little mermaid or the tin man or the pinnochio plot, the one about a character who is either inhuman or human but outside in some way, constantly searching for whatever it is that they consider to be the quintessential proof of humanity, preoccupied by it so deeply that they fail to realize the proof is in the act and fact of the search itself
(via @notaficwriter)
MAYBE WE’LL FIND IT IF WE BOTH LOOK
accepting that you’re objectively weird & owning it is infinitely better than being constantly desperate to appear normal to people who don’t even matter to you
Ball over every thing.
ancient peoples loooved a flood narrative it was kinda like their beatles
I need my weird alone time or I will explode
word on the street is if you suffer in just the right way for just long enough youll be rewarded
We need to isolate and start selectively breeding the plastic eating bacteria so we can optimise their efficiency, and then somehow splice their DNA into the gut bacteria of an obligate carnivore, so we can put it in our cats gut biomes so they'll finally be free of having to choose between whether they want to eat plastic or whether they want to live.
picture this: the year is 2048 and the winds of winter has finally been released. you’re making your way through the different povs, including the alayne and mercy chapters. more alayne and more mercy. alayne and mercy and alayne and mercy and alayne and mercy. finally you turn the page and see SANSA across the top. the sun is shining, the birds are singing, your skin is glowing. you finish the chapter, turn the page, and see that ARYA is next. you are so back.
materialist-scumbag
THE TICK THAT DREW THE MAP OF THE WEST June 28, 2026
So the longhorn was a garbage animal. Stringy, mean, half-feral, descended from Spanish cattle that had gone loose in the brush country for a couple centuries and bred for survival rather than meat. In Texas after the war it was worth maybe three or four dollars a head, because there were millions of them and nobody to eat them. The local market was Texans, and Texas was broke. Up in Chicago or New York the same animal was worth thirty, forty dollars, because the Union had spent four years eating its way through the eastern cattle supply and the cities were short on beef.
That spread is the whole engine of the cattle drive. You don't need a tick to explain why a man would walk a cow a thousand miles to multiply its value by ten. The arithmetic does it.
What the tick explains is the SHAPE.
Because the thing about the longhorn nobody in the romance mentions is that it was a carrier. Centuries in the brush had given it a shaky immune truce with Babesia bigemina, a protozoan that lived in its blood and rode around on a tick that dropped off into the grass wherever the herd went.
The longhorn itself looked fine. Walked fine, sold fine, butchered fine. But the cattle it walked past, the fat improved Midwestern stock that had never met the parasite, those animals would start pissing blood and die at a rate that touched nine in ten. The Texans, reasonably, refused to believe their healthy-looking cattle were doing it. They took it to the Supreme Court in 1877 and won, on the entirely correct observation that their cows weren't sick. The cows weren't sick. The cows were Typhoid Mary.
(The disease disappeared every winter, too, north of a certain latitude, which baffled everybody for thirty years until somebody worked out that the tick just froze to death up there, no vector, no disease, the whole thing seasonal in a way that made it look like a moral judgment on Texas cattle specifically. It wasn't anybody's leading hypothesis that an insect was committing the murders. The leading hypothesis for a while was that the longhorns were poisoning the grass.)
So now run the two facts together. The cow is worth ten times more up north. The cow kills every other cow it passes on the way up north. What do you get?
You get a line.
You get a bunch of lines, actually. Quarantine lines, drawn and redrawn by Missouri and Kansas legislatures and eventually by the federal government, declaring that Texas cattle could not cross at all, or could only cross in winter when the tick was dead, or could only cross by rail if they were going straight to slaughter and never touched dirt that a local cow might later stand on. Missouri shut its border. Farmers formed Vigilance Committees (which is a polite nineteenth-century way of saying armed men) and turned the herds back at gunpoint. Kansas banned Texas cattle outright in 1885. And every one of those legal and shotgun-enforced lines was a wall the drive had to find a gate in.
The gate was the railhead.
This is the part that rewires the map. The famous cattle town (Abilene, Dodge City, Wichita, Ellsworth, the whole gunfighter pantheon) is not a town that grew up around ranching or water or gold or a river crossing. It's a point where the trail coming up out of the quarantine zone touched a railroad that could take the cow east to the slaughterhouse without it walking through anybody's protected pasture.
Abilene gets invented basically from scratch in 1867 by a man named Joseph McCoy who looked at the map, found a spot on the Kansas Pacific that was far enough WEST that the trail in from Texas could swing around the settled farm country and its quarantine, and built stockyards there. The town is a loading dock. The cowboy at the end of the trail, in the saloon, shooting the place up: he is a longshoreman who has just finished a shift, and the shift was getting the cargo to the one point where it could legally change from hooves to wheels.
And the cargo had to keep moving west precisely because the tick kept the settled east closed. As Kansas farmers spread and the quarantine line marched west with them, the railhead had to march west too. Abilene to Ellsworth to Wichita to Dodge, each town flaring up and dying back as the line of legal infection-free transfer slid across the state. The towns weren't competing on amenities. They were competing on being the current solvent point in a chemistry problem about where a tick could and couldn't survive the trip.
(Dodge City lasts longest because it's furthest out, last to get caught by the advancing farms, sitting out where the quarantine couldn't reach it yet. Its whole mythological career (Wyatt Earp, Boot Hill, the Long Branch) is a few years long and happens because of an agricultural-settlement frontier creeping toward it at the speed of homesteading. When the farms arrive, the party's over. The party was always a function of the farms not having arrived.)
So the geography of the Wild West, which towns exist and why they're where they are and why they boom for five years and empty out and why the trail bends where it bends, is not topography and not destiny and not the romance of open range.
It's the intersection of a price differential and a quarantine map. The price differential said go north. The quarantine map, drawn by the tick, said you may only go north HERE, and HERE, and now not there anymore, here. The cow drew the route and the parasite drew the borders and the men with the guns were just enforcing a public-health regime they didn't know was a public-health regime.
And it all gets zeroed out, eventually, the same way these things always do, not by a hero but by a logistics upgrade. They build the Kansas City stockyards and the packing plants, and then the rail net gets dense enough that the cow doesn't have to walk to the train at all, the train comes to the cow. Refrigerated cars mean you slaughter in Chicago and ship the meat instead of the animal. The long drive, the trail town, the whole apparatus that existed only to get a tick-bearing animal across a quarantine line to a loading point, it just stops being necessary, and the gunfighter towns settle down into being ordinary Kansas, dry and flat and law-abiding, within about a decade of their own legend.
The cattle tick itself they finally beat in 1943, dipping every cow in the South in arsenic for forty years to break the lifecycle. Nobody made a movie about the dipping vats.
Same as it ever was.
they should invent a cigarette that gives you vitamins and hrt and shit
TESTOSTEROEN CIGARETTE BEING SMOKED BY A BUTCH DYKE OUTSIDE THE BAR SHE SHOTGUN THR SMOKE INTO MYMOUTH I GET SO HARD I PASS OUT SMASH MY HEAD AND DIE
sorry that was meant for the tags
it’s okay. You’ve painted a beautiful and true picture