soap🔥

lvl 21🍾 i cry alot. fuck corona

[woodsdyke]

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

[pissvortex]

Christians when they die and go to science instead of heaven

[clonedroids]

Because I feel like kids of color don’t hear it enough: domestic abuse is not a part of your culture. 

A lot of us were raised with the idea that “its normal for wives/children to get hit! it helps them learn– only white folk don’t get beaten when they misbehave”. That’s not true, white people aren’t the only ones who deserve a safe and abuse free environment. Black and brown people can and do have loving families. 

If you’re in a situation where you are enduring abuse and people use your culture to justify it, I want you to know that what they’re telling you are lies.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

as someone who studies this: statistically speaking, child abuse (including “spanking”, because all forms of hitting children are abusive) is pretty much equally prevalent in households of all racial, ethnic, and cultural backgrounds. so yeah, don’t let people use the “culture” excuse on you, but also, don’t believe others are experiencing it less just because it’s less normalized in their culture to talk about it. we all gotta work together to fix this shit.

[forfawkssake]

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

[jonmoxleys]

sometimes it just ends up being something like

[onlyhereforthedrama]

ITS BACK

[dontleavemydreams-deactivated20]

lord 

[uhmgilinsky]

Y’ALL NEED JESUS

[forfawkssake]

Please stop reblogging this post

[myterribletwenties]

This post made my water break

[myterribletwenties]

In honor of my daughter’s first birthday next week, I’m sharing the post that made me laugh so hard that it broke my water.

[forfawkssake]

WHAT

[whitakerforever]

God, I love this accursed website.

[myterribletwenties]

Hey internet, the girl that was born from this post is 4 years old today (July 2 2021) also, the gif still makes me laugh. Happy Birthday, Marceline!!

[twomanyfandomshelp]

Happy July 2nd, 2024, guess Marceline is 7 now

[insufferable-yapper]

Happy July 2nd, 2025; she’s 8 now (5am for me)

[myterriblethirties]

Happy Birthday to my Marceline, 8 years ago today (July 2, 2025) she came into this world five days before her due date to see wtf was so funny 🤣 this post, like many other things, are on a long list of topics to discuss when she’s older lol

[brokenteardrops]

Happy 9th Birthday Little Marceline!!! (July 2 2026)

[myterriblethirties]

It’s July 2 2026 internet, help me wish a Happy Birthday to my brilliant and beautiful 9 year old, Marceline! I’ve shown her (most of) the comments and she says “thank u internet 😁😁”

[roadhogsbigbelly]

i honestly don't really understand why "some people prefer watching gameplay online rather than playing games themselves" is treated as such a taboo when being a spectator is considered a pretty mundane way to engage with most sports, game shows, reality tv or even just like. chess.

[vrabia]

today i learned that the finnish word for ‘hazardous waste’ is ongelmajäte, which can also translate as ‘problematic garbage’ and my roommate and i immediately agreed this is a word that belongs on tumblr.

[callmebliss]

Your fave is ongelmajäte

[you-had-me-at-e-flat-major]

in german it’s Sondermüll which means special trash and that too belongs on tumblr

[pyrebomb]

One man’s ongelmajäte is another man’s sondermüll.

[the-quasar-hero]

“Rappers only talk about their money, cars, and clothes!”

Why might someone from a group of people that historically have been denied access to wealth, now brag that they have it?

“Rappers only talk about sex!”

Why might someone from a group that have historically been denied sexual autonomy now brag about their sexual escapades on their own terms?

“Rappers only talk about drugs and crime!”

Why might someone from a group that historically have been denied the more legal means to acquire wealth and had drugs forced on their community talk about their experiences with it?

[dogpuppy]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

also I don't think parents "these days" are uniquely terrible, I just think neglect is showing up in new ways as technology progresses. today's ipad kid would've been wandering around in a ditch alone all day and night before. parents not wanting to have to deal with children is not a new phenomenon.

[frankendykes-monster]

Today's iPad kid is quite literally yesterday's "shoved in front of a TV for hours on end" kid.

[shetheyslain]

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things

[dragon-in-a-fez]

I love when people whose first languages have grammatical gender use the wrong pronoun in English. "this river is so green because he is fed by glaciers" aw the river is Just A Little Guy. your version of my language is better

[fairycosmos]

your problem is you think if you communicate with clarity and earnestness that people will actually understand you

[mawofthemagnetar]

What do you mean “chat” is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?

When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.

[isuggestlandback]

If you ever wondered why they call tattoos and piercings "unprofessional" and "unsophisticated"

Source: Lainey Molnar

[batsandboba]

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

[liirker-at-thresholds]

I really like how the scientology speedrunning trend is developing, in this clip we see that the participants are

Not deterred by the closed door

Working as a group

Protecting their identities

Inflicting material costs to the institution via property destruction

Getting away at the end

These ideas were not all here from the beginning. They are genuinely gaining experience that can be applied elsewhere

[datsderbunnyblog]

The scientology speedruns were already funny but I thought they were joking when they said they were mapping the building. I absolutely lost it when I saw the actual map.