Hot Cheese and the Folly of Man

My name is Tristan and I draw stuff sometimes. [They/them] [He/him] [30] 🏳️‍⚧️

[depsidase]

[segamascott]

he still did 9/11 no one can take that from him ❤️

[ilikeflowey]

My computer: *doesn’t start*

Me: “woah girl- hey it’s okay- you’re okay! It’s ME.”

My computer: *nuzzles me*

Me: “heh.. that’s right, you’re safe now.. I’m here.” *strokes the screen of my laptop* daddy’s right here.”

My computer: *still doesn’t fucking start*

[wiiwheel]

When someone tags wereralph in your post its like stepping on a twig in the bara werewolf forest. he might reblog it causing the whole pack (lots of notes from a bunch of furries) to come a sniffin

[were--ralph]

[thememedaddy]

[bacontoktok]

[cellarspider]

May I present to you Wheel Running In the Wild, a published research paper that delights me to no end:

This paper intended to test whether would mice would run on a wheel if they found one, to try and determine if this was a natural behavior or a stress response in captivity. They put a wheel in a protected little box with a camera that took pictures any time the wheel turned, and tallied up how often it was used by what.

Mice were, happily, the most common users of the wheel, and their patterns of use indicated they were doing so voluntarily once they figured it out.

But the second most common users.

Those were slugs.

[deergirlsrituals]

the point of pink camo is that it looks cute

[bladeemaid]

no it's for concealment during combat operations in fantasy candy land type environments with bushes made of cotton candy and candy canes used as load bearing architectural elements. like the kart game in wreck it ralph. duhh.

[deergirlsrituals]

[epicsause-official]

on sharing one's opinons

[makuyi13]

Felt like I needed to share my experience as well

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

“but shrouded black figures are scary!” not when ur muslim. its the funniest fucking thing. this is labeled on pinterest under shit like “classic horror” “scary phone wallpaper”

but that LITERALLY just looks like a niqabi or someone in a jilbab. Like Look at this pic of me (from a self photoshoot, now w/o the dramatic lighting and dark background)

or this pic of me

or this pic of me

like its so funny i can’t be scared of shrouded figures it just looks like me.

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

if i saw this i would just be like “Assalam alaikum sister, dope sword you got there”

[ultmateragnarok]

I mean I think a part of the ‘scary background’ bit is the thing where the individual in question is staring directly at the viewer from a foggy pond in a dense forest. And also the literal burning halo

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

sounds like a normal Friday night. if a sister wants to go on a walk in the evening who am i to stop her. if she has a burning halo that’s the will of god.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I saw a political campaign ad on TV that had been running for 1500 years. The guy in it was running for the Roman Senate.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

[waywardconsultingtimelady]

The Sears commericial has only been running for 1,499 years

[hometoursandotherstuff]

BEFORE

AFTER

[angelicguy]

me and the boys have a couple of chains wrapped around the sword in the stone hooked up to mikes toyota tundra gonna pull that fucker out like a tooth.

[seaweed-station]

Me and the boys misunderstood the arcane nature of the stone and now the Toyota is king of England

[lakevida]

when youre inadvertently 1% too nice to a straight guy you can usually pinpoint the exact moment where he decides you must be acting that way because you want to fuck down on him crazy style and it is at this point that one would be well advised to have a cyanide capsule under a false tooth or an equivalent fast acting response

[bisexualwario]

[20th-centuryghost]

sorry this was going to be a tags addition because I only get to use my coated pantone swatchbook like 6 times a year when i have a new enamel pin to design, but...

METALLIC GOLD PANTIES ????

[purlturtle]

[mayfay]

[caspercryptid]

I feel like not enough people realize that people under enormous strain act really really fucking Weird

[pine-branches]

things humans are known to do when stressed:

-hallucinate

-cry over what seems to be small things

-become furiously angry over what seems to be small things

-hit a self destruct button over and over again

-lose all sense of reality

-becoming straight up unable to communicate

-view every situation as life or death

-experience delusions/become vulnerable to irrational worldviews

-perceive hostility where none exists

-become extremely nauseous and/or throw up

-stop engaging in sleeping/eating/basic hygiene

-stop processing sensory input

-process way too much sensory input all at once

-lash out at others/themselves

-and more!

being able to recognize when a human (ie. you or another person) is so stressed out they cannot think clearly is VERY important for conflict resolution and diffusing emotional crisis. highly recommend trying to train yourself at being able to recognize that state of panic- there is a point in which logic and rationality is useless and you have to address the underlying emotional issue first. knowing that saves everyone a lot of pain and struggle.

[unthrifty--loveliness-deactivat]

Just so we’re clear, if I point out that you did something racist, that’s not the same as me thinking you’re irremediably terrible. You did a racist thing.

[unthrifty--loveliness-deactivat]

You think you don’t do racist things, homophobic things, etc? You do. I caught myself in fat phobic and homophobic lines of thinking/speech just this morning. I’m fucking gay married. Nothing disqualifies you from acting in a way that reflects the society you exist in. We are obliged to fight it. Why not fight it in honesty and with camaraderie?

[ankle-beez]

surprisingly forward-thinking of jim henson and co. to make a female character in the 70's that's allowed to be loud-mouthed and violent and kind of overwhelmingly romantic and even a huge bitch at times and not have a moment where any character asks her to change

[ankle-beez]

going through all the muppet movies in a row made me realize that like. miss piggy was made in the 70's. and it's so rare even today to have a character like her. she's loud, she's selfish, she's funny, she's extremely vain, she's obsessed with romance, she's violent, she's kind of annoying, and there's not a single moment in any of these films where she's asked to tone down any of these personality traits. i am not joking when i say that miss piggy might be one of the best treated female characters ever written