sometimes you gotta bite the bullet and put "text your friend whom you love and genuinely want to talk to" on your to-do list because otherwise it is not getting done
honestly so glad this one is gaining traction. just saw it in my notifications and went "MAN ALRIGHT" to text yet another person i have been genuinely wanting to text back for days
First egg didn't leave the hen properly. Body starts working on second egg, building a shell around the goo so it will be protected outside the body. First egg is still in there and gets the shell built around it also.
Good work on the chicken laying it, chickens can easily die in this scenario.
Just came home from a dinner party with the friendgroup at which several people kept saying "Ask Pedro" or "Pedro will know" and I was terrified that they were referring to an AI like Claude but no, thank fuck, they were referring to a cardboard cutout of Pedro Pascal that someone left upstairs and who has been designated a kind of patron saint status in the household.
Actually bouncing off that last reblog, I think it is absolutely important to understand not only that Jack Drake is new money, but that he is a very specific type of new money parent, (which I happen to think is one that is declining in general existence at least in part to the declining affordability of a lot of these things, although these mentalities are still present, just to a somewhat lesser degree).
Which is parents that are very wealthy but very anti- old money scion behavior of just getting whatever you want. (The beef between old and new money being something that can be absolutely enormous and informs Jack's hatred of Bruce.)
These type of parents would have enough money to get their kids basically anything, but would go "no, I'm not getting you a car, you have to work and earn money and pay for it yourself". With the idea being to teach the kids that they actually need to work for everything they receive, and to be fiscally responsible. Nothing is handed to you on a silver platter.
And then, for instance, Bruce gets Tim a car.
Which not only gives the impression of kind of "buying" his son, but also explicitly undermines his parenting style.
Like, you really really cannot fully understand the absolute massive beef Jack has with Bruce without the knowledge that it involves fear that Tim will learn to start acting like an old money scion.
What makes it kind of extra delicious is that Tim actually does work his ass off. Bruce gives him a car, yes, but that's after all of Tim's hard work and training, after relying on Bruce and Alfred for rides as Robin, after working his ass off as Robin. Tim didn't work to earn the money to buy a car, but he absolutely put in the work to earn it - Jack just didn't see any of it.
It's even better then when Jack sells Tim's car to pay off his debt, because he took something someone else had worked for to fix his mistakes. In his head, he was paying off his debt AND getting rid of something Bruce had "just" bought for Tim on a whim, but from Tim's perspective Jack took something Tim earned and cared about to cover his own ass (that Bruce had to then fix by buying the Redbird and holding it for Tim).
And I get that this isn't technically Jack's fault because he didn't know about Tim being Robin (at the time), but a good chunk of Jack and Tim's problems could have been solved by sitting down and having a conversation about it, or Jack having a conversation with Bruce or with Bruce and Tim, but I genuinely think Jack would rather eat glass than do any of those.
100% the thing about this whole gripe is that what Jack sees isn't even true - Tim worked his ass off in regard to everything to do with Bruce, but it's all tied up with Robin stuff, so he doesn't know.
And then when he does find out, he forces him to quit, which yes, is an additional irony even if it sounds reasonable to a lot of people on the face of it, because he's been glorifying the story of a literal child soldier in their family Tim's entire life. (Not to mention that his finding out is tied up in a gross invasion of privacy and his reaction involving threatening Bruce with a gun are both unreasonable stances, I have a full breakdown of Robin: Unmasked as a Jack hate post on my blog. This post isn't about that.)
Which is why the closest he comes to forming an actual, genuine relationship with Tim is in the short time period he has between Tim going back to Robin / him accepting that and his death. Which is where the argument about whether he could have been decent from that point forward comes into play. Because he died, so we don't know.
Basically I think from the perspective of a reader in regard to canon Jack, having a positive or negative opinion of him at the end of the day is very tied up in if you think, had he lived, if he'd have been able to maintain his acceptance long-term now that he knew Tim was fully being raised with this kind of work ethic from both ends, or if he could just not have helped himself but fall back to being bitchy about Tim's relationship with Bruce to the point of his own relationship degrading once again. (Well besides people that might have a positive opinion of him because they agree with a parent being able to treat their child like property, which is a stance I'm fully not going to engage in.)
I have a hard time really believing that Jack would have improved all that much if he had lived, tbh. A lot of what we see from Jack Drake is that he prioritizes himself and what he wants first, and he sees Tim as his property and an extension of himself before he sees Tim as an independent human being - even while loving Tim. Jack waffles a lot and sometimes does a complete about-face in his opinions/behaviors as different writers try to figure out what to do with him, but at his core, he is (or at least very much wants to be) the traditional conservative 'head of the household' patriarch: he wants a nice house in a nice neighborhood, he wants an attractive and doting wife, an obedient son who respects and looks up to him, and he wants to be respected by his peers and seen as a 'real man'.
And from what we see, he has those things for the most part, but there are a few glaring asterisks: his debt problems, the mishandling and loss of Drake Industries, the way Dana challenges him on some things, the way he's older and not in his prime, but all of that can be smoothed over.
Except then there's Tim.
While Tim loves Jack and respects him to an extent, he's never going to be the obedient respectful son Jack wants, and I also don't think he really respects Jack as a parent. Jack's still his dad and he respects him as a person, but as a parent? Everytime Jack tries to tell Tim what to do or order him around, it's pretty transparent that Tim only does it if he wants to. If he thinks it's stupid or there's something more important to be doing, he is halfway out the window before Jack is even finished turning around. Tim does what Jack tells him to because he's trying to placate him or it serves his own purposes, he never really thinks Jack is right or really respects his decision.
And I think Jack knows that on some level, and he hates it, especially because in his eyes, the moment Bruce tells Tim to do something, Tim can't do it fast enough. Bruce lives rent-free in Jack Drake's head as the personification of his own emasculation: rich, good looking, always has beautiful women throwing themselves at him, fighting fit and in shape, everyone talking about him all the time, and all Tim's obedience/respect/adoration that is, in Jack's mind, his by right.
On top of all that, Tim and Jack are just very different people. They have different interests, they interact with people differently, value different things. Tim tries to placate Jack and meet him halfway on things, but it's pretty clear he and his dad just don't have a lot in common, and that's another blow to Jack's ego: his son loves him but doesn't respect him as a parent, and there's very little Jack has to share with Tim that Tim is even interested in. And again, there's Bruce looming in the horizon with shared interests with Tim.
Interacting with Tim is death by a thousand instances of minor ego death, a bright glaring reminder that Jack just wasn't a good dad, that he fucked up too much and tried way too hard way too late, with the added background radiation of Bruce the Batman Wayne being his competition. Repairing his relationship with Tim would take a lot of work, a lot of introspection, and letting go of his problems with Bruce. It would take literal years, and frankly with all the times Jack just threatens to send Tim to boarding or military school when Tim isn't doing what he wants? I don't think he'd be willing to put in the work, not without kicking and screaming and digging his heels in the whole time.
#jack out here having the messiest nastiest divorce slash custody battle with Bruce#a man he has never been married to#nor been in the same room with for a consecutive hour#meanwhile the one he should really be worroed about is Dick#Jack and Bruce arguing about who Tim loves and respects more#meanwhile Tim is staring at Dick with stars in his eyes kicking his heels
Partly just bringing this out of the tags. Although also important to note that said argument about who Tim loves in respects more isn't either of them thinking it's themselves, but thinking it is the guy they are arguing with, while thinking that said guy doesn't deserve it. Bruce looses some rank in the Bruce Wayne Haters Club (of which he's normally high-level) purely from Jack annoying him too much. Meanwhile, Dick is absolutely 100% the person Tim loves and respects the most.
#Tim being the President and Founding Member of the Gotham Dick Grayson Fanclub #Bruce thought it could be him for a while but Tim beat him by several minutes and graciously allows Bruce to be Vice-President
#I think an important thing to note about Jack from a meta perspective #is that he was originally intended to be killed not long after Janet #but was kept around because it would be āmore interestingā #so he 100% only ever lived for the Drama#and in the end he died as he lived in that way #just wanted to add that I found the actual reblog and the tags and it's 100% valid to love that whole situation BECAUSE it's messy #it's basically another post I reblogged where it's like āthat character is problematicā āyeah they're SUPPOSED to beā that's Jack (via @katanahime)
#DC killed Janet before she could divorce Jack so Bruce gets the post divorce child custody battle mess instead #Jack does not know how to parent as a verb #he never needed to when Janet was alive and after her death he does not learn (via @mizminola)
and also some tags on the original post bc they made me lol:
#One of my fav Jack drake moments (I think this in batgirl?) #Tim says they should get a dishwasher #Jack says that they have a dishwasher and his name is Tim (via @aliteralchicken)
Jack's biggest issue when Janet died was that he suddenly became a single parent, and he didn't realise the difference between being the 'fun' parent who was the one who primarily brought home income and spent 3 hours with his kid on a Saturday afternoon, with being the hands on parent responsible for actively caring for the kid. Because up until that moment Janet had handled the active parenting as had Tim's boarding school.
Which is why Jack was always bringing up the topic of boarding school: from his perspective he'd had a good, obedient, easy to manage kid when Tim was at boarding school, and he now had a kid who seemed to constantly be getting into fights, was disrespectful and acting out. To Jack, the difference in the equation was the school, so he wanted to send Tim off so it was easy like before. Whereas an awful lot of it was that Jack had never actually had to actively parent his kid up until this point, and the fact that he now had a 14 year old who didn't have any experience respecting him as an authority figure over bedtimes and homework and other boundaries and so just...mostly didn't listen? Jack was massively struggling with that.
Plus, Tim did have boundaries in his life - he had Bruce and Alfred providing them, both of whom had a lot more experience in terms of mentoring and parenting, and whose authority Tim respected. And because he respected them more than Jack, and was actively concealing a massive secret from Jack, Tim looked far more disrespectful and like he was picking and choosing when to behave for his father, rather than being respectful and obedient.'
Also, this change also lines up with going from two to one parents at the same time as the transition from pre-teen to teen, meaning Tim was due to become more difficult and independent anyway.
Actually bouncing off that last reblog, I think it is absolutely important to understand not only that Jack Drake is new money, but that he is a very specific type of new money parent, (which I happen to think is one that is declining in general existence at least in part to the declining affordability of a lot of these things, although these mentalities are still present, just to a somewhat lesser degree).
Which is parents that are very wealthy but very anti- old money scion behavior of just getting whatever you want. (The beef between old and new money being something that can be absolutely enormous and informs Jack's hatred of Bruce.)
These type of parents would have enough money to get their kids basically anything, but would go "no, I'm not getting you a car, you have to work and earn money and pay for it yourself". With the idea being to teach the kids that they actually need to work for everything they receive, and to be fiscally responsible. Nothing is handed to you on a silver platter.
And then, for instance, Bruce gets Tim a car.
Which not only gives the impression of kind of "buying" his son, but also explicitly undermines his parenting style.
Like, you really really cannot fully understand the absolute massive beef Jack has with Bruce without the knowledge that it involves fear that Tim will learn to start acting like an old money scion.
What makes it kind of extra delicious is that Tim actually does work his ass off. Bruce gives him a car, yes, but that's after all of Tim's hard work and training, after relying on Bruce and Alfred for rides as Robin, after working his ass off as Robin. Tim didn't work to earn the money to buy a car, but he absolutely put in the work to earn it - Jack just didn't see any of it.
It's even better then when Jack sells Tim's car to pay off his debt, because he took something someone else had worked for to fix his mistakes. In his head, he was paying off his debt AND getting rid of something Bruce had "just" bought for Tim on a whim, but from Tim's perspective Jack took something Tim earned and cared about to cover his own ass (that Bruce had to then fix by buying the Redbird and holding it for Tim).
And I get that this isn't technically Jack's fault because he didn't know about Tim being Robin (at the time), but a good chunk of Jack and Tim's problems could have been solved by sitting down and having a conversation about it, or Jack having a conversation with Bruce or with Bruce and Tim, but I genuinely think Jack would rather eat glass than do any of those.
100% the thing about this whole gripe is that what Jack sees isn't even true - Tim worked his ass off in regard to everything to do with Bruce, but it's all tied up with Robin stuff, so he doesn't know.
And then when he does find out, he forces him to quit, which yes, is an additional irony even if it sounds reasonable to a lot of people on the face of it, because he's been glorifying the story of a literal child soldier in their family Tim's entire life. (Not to mention that his finding out is tied up in a gross invasion of privacy and his reaction involving threatening Bruce with a gun are both unreasonable stances, I have a full breakdown of Robin: Unmasked as a Jack hate post on my blog. This post isn't about that.)
Which is why the closest he comes to forming an actual, genuine relationship with Tim is in the short time period he has between Tim going back to Robin / him accepting that and his death. Which is where the argument about whether he could have been decent from that point forward comes into play. Because he died, so we don't know.
Basically I think from the perspective of a reader in regard to canon Jack, having a positive or negative opinion of him at the end of the day is very tied up in if you think, had he lived, if he'd have been able to maintain his acceptance long-term now that he knew Tim was fully being raised with this kind of work ethic from both ends, or if he could just not have helped himself but fall back to being bitchy about Tim's relationship with Bruce to the point of his own relationship degrading once again. (Well besides people that might have a positive opinion of him because they agree with a parent being able to treat their child like property, which is a stance I'm fully not going to engage in.)
I have a hard time really believing that Jack would have improved all that much if he had lived, tbh. A lot of what we see from Jack Drake is that he prioritizes himself and what he wants first, and he sees Tim as his property and an extension of himself before he sees Tim as an independent human being - even while loving Tim. Jack waffles a lot and sometimes does a complete about-face in his opinions/behaviors as different writers try to figure out what to do with him, but at his core, he is (or at least very much wants to be) the traditional conservative 'head of the household' patriarch: he wants a nice house in a nice neighborhood, he wants an attractive and doting wife, an obedient son who respects and looks up to him, and he wants to be respected by his peers and seen as a 'real man'.
And from what we see, he has those things for the most part, but there are a few glaring asterisks: his debt problems, the mishandling and loss of Drake Industries, the way Dana challenges him on some things, the way he's older and not in his prime, but all of that can be smoothed over.
Except then there's Tim.
While Tim loves Jack and respects him to an extent, he's never going to be the obedient respectful son Jack wants, and I also don't think he really respects Jack as a parent. Jack's still his dad and he respects him as a person, but as a parent? Everytime Jack tries to tell Tim what to do or order him around, it's pretty transparent that Tim only does it if he wants to. If he thinks it's stupid or there's something more important to be doing, he is halfway out the window before Jack is even finished turning around. Tim does what Jack tells him to because he's trying to placate him or it serves his own purposes, he never really thinks Jack is right or really respects his decision.
And I think Jack knows that on some level, and he hates it, especially because in his eyes, the moment Bruce tells Tim to do something, Tim can't do it fast enough. Bruce lives rent-free in Jack Drake's head as the personification of his own emasculation: rich, good looking, always has beautiful women throwing themselves at him, fighting fit and in shape, everyone talking about him all the time, and all Tim's obedience/respect/adoration that is, in Jack's mind, his by right.
On top of all that, Tim and Jack are just very different people. They have different interests, they interact with people differently, value different things. Tim tries to placate Jack and meet him halfway on things, but it's pretty clear he and his dad just don't have a lot in common, and that's another blow to Jack's ego: his son loves him but doesn't respect him as a parent, and there's very little Jack has to share with Tim that Tim is even interested in. And again, there's Bruce looming in the horizon with shared interests with Tim.
Interacting with Tim is death by a thousand instances of minor ego death, a bright glaring reminder that Jack just wasn't a good dad, that he fucked up too much and tried way too hard way too late, with the added background radiation of Bruce the Batman Wayne being his competition. Repairing his relationship with Tim would take a lot of work, a lot of introspection, and letting go of his problems with Bruce. It would take literal years, and frankly with all the times Jack just threatens to send Tim to boarding or military school when Tim isn't doing what he wants? I don't think he'd be willing to put in the work, not without kicking and screaming and digging his heels in the whole time.
#jack out here having the messiest nastiest divorce slash custody battle with Bruce#a man he has never been married to#nor been in the same room with for a consecutive hour#meanwhile the one he should really be worroed about is Dick#Jack and Bruce arguing about who Tim loves and respects more#meanwhile Tim is staring at Dick with stars in his eyes kicking his heels
Partly just bringing this out of the tags. Although also important to note that said argument about who Tim loves in respects more isn't either of them thinking it's themselves, but thinking it is the guy they are arguing with, while thinking that said guy doesn't deserve it. Bruce looses some rank in the Bruce Wayne Haters Club (of which he's normally high-level) purely from Jack annoying him too much. Meanwhile, Dick is absolutely 100% the person Tim loves and respects the most.
#Tim being the President and Founding Member of the Gotham Dick Grayson Fanclub #Bruce thought it could be him for a while but Tim beat him by several minutes and graciously allows Bruce to be Vice-President
#I think an important thing to note about Jack from a meta perspective #is that he was originally intended to be killed not long after Janet #but was kept around because it would be āmore interestingā #so he 100% only ever lived for the Drama#and in the end he died as he lived in that way #just wanted to add that I found the actual reblog and the tags and it's 100% valid to love that whole situation BECAUSE it's messy #it's basically another post I reblogged where it's like āthat character is problematicā āyeah they're SUPPOSED to beā that's Jack (via @katanahime)
#DC killed Janet before she could divorce Jack so Bruce gets the post divorce child custody battle mess instead #Jack does not know how to parent as a verb #he never needed to when Janet was alive and after her death he does not learn (via @mizminola)
and also some tags on the original post bc they made me lol:
#One of my fav Jack drake moments (I think this in batgirl?) #Tim says they should get a dishwasher #Jack says that they have a dishwasher and his name is Tim (via @aliteralchicken)
Jack's biggest issue when Janet died was that he suddenly became a single parent, and he didn't realise the difference between being the 'fun' parent who was the one who primarily brought home income and spent 3 hours with his kid on a Saturday afternoon, with being the hands on parent responsible for actively caring for the kid. Because up until that moment Janet had handled the active parenting as had Tim's boarding school.
Which is why Jack was always bringing up the topic of boarding school: from his perspective he'd had a good, obedient, easy to manage kid when Tim was at boarding school, and he now had a kid who seemed to constantly be getting into fights, was disrespectful and acting out. To Jack, the difference in the equation was the school, so he wanted to send Tim off so it was easy like before. Whereas an awful lot of it was that Jack had never actually had to actively parent his kid up until this point, and the fact that he now had a 14 year old who didn't have any experience respecting him as an authority figure over bedtimes and homework and other boundaries and so just...mostly didn't listen? Jack was massively struggling with that.
Plus, Tim did have boundaries in his life - he had Bruce and Alfred providing them, both of whom had a lot more experience in terms of mentoring and parenting, and whose authority Tim respected. And because he respected them more than Jack, and was actively concealing a massive secret from Jack, Tim looked far more disrespectful and like he was picking and choosing when to behave for his father, rather than being respectful and obedient.'
Also, this change also lines up with going from two to one parents at the same time as the transition from pre-teen to teen, meaning Tim was due to become more difficult and independent anyway.
put that woman into a Situation now. i'm serious. drop that sad whiteboy you've been chewing on for the last three hours and just try chewing on the Woman. it's so much better out here. the world is beautiful. you are putting yourself in a cage. take my hand and come with me. put that woman into a Situation
Tbh, I'm significantly less concerned with people casually using the word crazy to mean busy or overwhelming or something than I am with people adopting clinical psychiatric language in an attempt to appropriate the pathologizing function of psychiatry for themselves (as in the case of people using "narcissist" to essentially mean "evil person" and diagnosing everyone in their life as a narcissist).
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