midnight thoughts

"I know it's too late as night turns to day. Now there's no escaping the ghost. I can't shake these midnight thoughts when I'm alone. Latching to my brain and never letting go. So I'll start making friends with the noise in my head and all these midnight thoughts when I'm alone."Leo Everett, 17, regular Luxor student

[leoxeverett-archive]

isakvaltersen03‌:

Isak thought the boy was so intimidating and he wasnt really sure why. However, Isak was not about to let him copy all of his hard work without thinking about it and not learning from it as the assignments were made to help you learn. “ i cant help you that way, thats no help at all dude” he said as he turned away ready to leave. He could be talked into a lot of things, but this was not one of them. 

“It is help, dude,” he replied, mocking Isak a bit as he added ‘dude’. Though he was growing more and more frustrated by the second, the irony wasn’t lost on him. In fact, he’d probably be laughing or chuckling had he not been so annoyed. Leo was never one to ask for help. Maybe it was because he couldn’t trust anyone besides himself (though even that was questionable lately), or maybe he was just too arrogant to admit he needed help. Possibly a mix of both as well. Yet there he was, almost begging Isak- essentially a stranger for help. “Listen, I’ll make it up to you, okay? I’ll give you money or something, whatever. You name it... I just need to get this done.” 

[leoxeverett-archive]

jxnechang‌:

“Oh great” June replies rather harshly to the males remark about the notes under her door. It was hard for her to tell if he was being serious or simply just feeding the fire inside of her that was slowly burning. Furrowing her brow at the others inquiry about psych class June let out a rather obvious scoff, if he wanted a show he could have one, June had already stepped out of her comfort zone to get the light on, so why not play In to what appeared to me the males little game. Adjusting herself in her seat so she could look Leo in the eyes June’s head cocked to the side “ The psychology behind cheating? This gets your gears turning? You know the best way to learn about a cheater? It’s to be a cheater.”

Leo almost laughed at her suggestion to learn about cheaters. “Oh, I can’t do that. That would be dishonest. And I’m the most honest person there is! Honesty is the best policy, or so they say.” Leo Everett- the most honest person there was? Now that was laughable, and he knew it. He was blunt, sure... but there was a huge difference between being blunt and being honest. He lied constantly. Lied to others, lied to himself... His desire to turn every social interaction in some sort of conflict didn’t stemmed from a place of honesty and values. “So what is it with you? You like the rush of getting away with it? You some sort of adrenaline junkie? Get off on defying authority and the rules?” 

[gifshouse]

Gregory House + favorite lines

[leoxeverett-archive]

liadavenport‌:

Lia decided not to dignify that question with a response. In truth, she just didn’t have any energy left to come up with a witty response. She was exhausted, which at this point was quite literally nothing new to her, but she also felt more drained than usual. The fear of her secret becoming known to everyone was starting to suffocate her and she had to keep reminding herself to inhale and exhale, like if she didn’t keep repeating how to breathe in her head, she’d forget to do it. Not forget how, of course because that would be absurd, but, she felt like… Like she would just stop, without meaning to; that was how much the fear was crushing her, as dramatic as it sounded even in her head. “Of course it was. I’m hilarious,” she said dryly, inhaling a deep breath and exhaling quietly as he asked her which secret was hers. She didn’t respond right away; obviously she wasn’t going to tell him that hers had even been one of them, but she was certain her hesitance to say anything at all was making the truth obvious. Leo had made it pretty clear that he could read her, which was more irritating than she wanted to admit aloud. “Gee, I appreciate you thinking so highly of me.” She hadn’t meant for that to sound so entirely sarcastic, but apparently her mouth had a mind of its own. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.” A colossal lie, and somewhat of a joke because the idea of either of them revealing any secrets they had to each other, of all people, was absurd. “What do you care which one mine was, anyway? Not that I’m implying I have one or that it was one of them, but regardless, why the hell would I tell you? If I’m not going to be the one to step into the light or whatever, I’m sure as hell not to going to sit here and open up to you. I’d rather choke.” 

Leo went back to drawing when he heard more sarcastic responses coming from Lia. They really did seem to be falling into a pattern with their interactions. Not that he was getting bored in any way, of course. Tormenting Lia still was proving to be his best source of entertainment no matter how predictable it was. Maybe that was just the beauty of it... he didn’t have to think to get under her skin. It felt more like some effortless talent he possessed, if one could classify being a complete dick as a talent. Though when she made a deal, despite them both knowing it was a lie, and asked the question, Leo looked over at her- or rather her silhouette- for a moment. “I don’t care.” His response to the first question... of course he’d answer with that. When had he ever admitted to caring about anything or anyone? As far as his experiences at Luxor went, that had yet to happen. “It’s just fun reminding you of the secret that you’re definitely hiding.”

[leoxeverett-archive]

maiacroft‌:

Once she heard him speak, she was relieved. She could tell it was a student at least and not some creep. Taking a cautious step forward after he asked the question, she tried to make out who it was and it was familiar. “My problem is that you’re acting like a pervert and not announcing who you are.” She said in her usual monotone, clearly not amused with the entire situation. After all, if he would’ve just said who he would, she would’ve left him alone and continued on with her business. Not like she would care much either, however his silence was enough to make her believe he shouldn’t be there. And her mind only thought of the worst things. 

“Right, because sitting under a tree and not wanting to be bothered are classic signs of perversion.” He scoffed, rolling his eyes slightly. After a quick pause, he let out a heavy sigh before finally answering her original question. “Leo Everett. Happy?”

[leoxeverett-archive]

reellykenzie‌:

“God, if you weren’t so obviously fucked up in the head, I would beat the hell out of you,” she threatened, her hands tightening into fists to keep herself from throwing anything else. Dalton could tell she was upset too. He started to make noise and move around his stall, on edge at seeing her so on edge. “There has to be something seriously wrong with you for you to literally ruin every social interaction you ever have. What the hell is wrong with you to make you hate the world and everyone in it? Why do you have to ruin the entire world just to bring yourself down? I think you’d be perfectly capable of ruining your own life without bringing everyone else down with you,” she declared, probably saying the most hateful things she had ever said to someone in her life. Kenzie couldn’t even look at him as she put the stuff away and patted the horse once before leaving the stall and locking it up. “Go to hell, you piece of shit.” With that, she walked out of the stables, running towards the dorms and darkness.

Leo’s eyes narrowed slightly, and he pointed his chin up just a hair as Kenzie-- half threatened him. He wasn’t even sure himself whether it was a gesture of defense or a challenging position. Like he wanted to say something like ‘well get on with it, then.” After all, any sort of fight never was something Leo really ever said no to anymore. In fact, he seemed to go actively looking for fights... for trouble. However before he could taunt her any further, she continued. And the words she spat out at him... were unexpected to say the least. At first, it was nothing he hadn’t heard before. In fact, he was surprised that no one at Luxor said anything like that yet. Telling him about how fucked up he was in the head, how he ruined everything and purposefully made people despise him. As if that was all news to him. 

The last two points... those weren’t what he heard countless times by countless people. His jaw clenched and his brows scrunched together... but it wasn’t anger. Not at Kenzie, at least. He wasn’t even sure what he was feeling, but it was something. Something he didn’t like-- He didn’t like having a strange lump in his throat... or that it suddenly felt like the air had gotten thinner within a second... or that his chest began to ache. So he tried to do what he did to all of the emotions and-- well just everything in his life that he didn’t like: replace them with anger. Only this time, when he tried to do that, the anger wasn’t externalized. It was as if in that very moment, Kenzie was a mirror, forcing Leo to face himself. Her words weren’t any worse than the thoughts he had about himself on a regular basis-- but somehow it was different hearing them from someone else’s mouth rather than from his own mind. 

He couldn’t say anything in response. He definitely couldn’t tell her that what she just said was nothing compared to what he thought about himself nearly every single night as he was trying to fall asleep? But he couldn’t even open his mouth to give one of his regular sarcastic remarks whenever things got too real. Because any remark he’d say would be too vulnerable. A ‘tell me something I don’t know’ or ‘good to know’ or even a ‘you done?’ would have cracked his hard exterior because he wouldn’t be able to deliver it with enough sarcasm or coldness. Either he’d be too soft, where the weakness in his voice would be painfully detectable... or he’d be too harsh... where it would just confirm to Kenzie that she hit the nail on the head. He couldn’t do that. He couldn’t give her any confirmation that she actually got to him in any way... and saying any response would definitely do that. So instead, she, for lack of a better term, made him speechless... 

Her parting statement was less original and more along the lines of what he had hard countless times before... yet this was the only time, apart from the first time he heard those years, where they actually meant anything to him. Where he felt anything in response to hearing them. He just subtly nodded and looked back down at his sketchbook as she stormed off. He held that pose for what felt like a few hours. It was like he couldn’t even move even if he wanted to... like he was paralyzed-- a statue. Frozen with whatever surge of feelings that were coursing through his veins. Yet the strangest thing was... he felt all of those feelings... all of those unidentifiable feelings which made him feel frozen--yet he also felt frozen with numbness and apathy. Just like he was feeling everything and nothing at the same exact time. 

[charlieblaskoo]

“SOME ASSHAT had the audacity to think that he could use the blackout as an excuse to put his hand on my boob. So I punched him in the dick and told him that was the ONLY action he was ever getting.” a huff emitted from pink lips, honestly grateful that the blackout was over now, “anyways…i know where we can get alcohol. if you’re interested?”

[leoxeverett-archive]

Leo was hardly paying attention to her story, and was fully satisfied with ignoring her-- until she mentioned alcohol. His interest definitely peaked at that point as he finally looked up from his sketchbook to her for the first time since she began talking. “Lead the way.” 

[jjxjones]

It had been almost twenty-four hours since June Chang had shown her face on campus, minus it being all over school with her confession. She was embarrassed, and scared. What would people think? What was the school board going to do to her? Her mind was racing like a horse on a track. She didn’t want to leave her room, but she knew she was going to sooner or later, so why not sooner.

June found herself in the cafe, her headphones in and her head hung low, a cup of coffee in front of her and untouched food to her left. She had thought no one would come there considering the time of day, people would have been in class, but to her surprise a shadow stood over her blocking the light. Keeping her head low she pulled a headphone out of her ear “Look,” She started with a sigh “If you’re going to give me shit, like I know a lot of people want to. Can you please just save it? Or slide an aggressive not under my dorm door? I did what I had to.”

@luxorstarters​

[leoxeverett-archive]

If Leo was being completely honest, he didn’t even care about June and the fact she cheated her way into the school. It wasn’t like he thought he was any better than her just because his family could afford to send him there without a scholarship.The only thing he cared about was that it wasn’t his secret that was exposed. When it came down to it, he knew he should be thanking her. Not only for restoring power to the school by coming clean, but also for ensuring that Leo’s secret was safe. For now.

Though even though he knew all of that on a conscious level, that didn’t stop him from strolling up to her when he saw her all alone with her head down. A brow raised when she told him off even before he said anything. “Oh, don’t worry. You’re sure to get a few notes under your door from me.” He said with a smirk. It wasn’t true in the slightest... the thought of writing an aggressive note hadn’t even crossed his mind, and he had no intent on doing so. But he figured saying something like that would annoy her, and that seemed to be his goal for most social interactions these days. “Actually, I’m working on a project for my psych class.” He further explained, telling yet another lie, before walking in front of her and taking a seat on the chair opposite of her. “The project can be on anything we find interesting, and I have to say... cheaters are quite interesting, and I wanted to learn more about the psychology behind cheating.”

[leoxeverett-archive]

Paralyzed - Leo Everett

paralyzed - nf / my eyes - dr. horrible / midnight thoughts - set it off / space oddity - david bowie / better than yourself - lukas graham / behind blue eyes - the who / slipping - dr. horrible / killer in the mirror- set it off / wolf in sheep’s clothing - set it off / nightmare - set it off (suicide tw) / hate me - blue october / innocence - nathan wagner

[leoxeverett-archive]

reellykenzie‌:

She was about to apologize for asking and offer some sort of condolences when he told her he was joking. Without even thinking, she threw the brush she had been holding at his head, missing and hitting the wood behind him instead. “That’s not funny. As someone who lost a dad, that’s just about the douchiest thing I have ever heard.”

Leo instinctively ducked and lifted his hands up to protect his head. Her quick response, specifically the action itself, certainly surprised him. Not to say he didn’t think he didn’t deserve it, of course he did. He just didn’t expect her to be the one to act violently. Her next words definitely gave him some more insight on why she reacted so quickly, and he looked into her eyes as she spoke. For half a second- maybe even less, his features softened... There was compassion in his eyes. As if a hint of humanity was shining through- but for no more than half a second before he pushed that all away. “Just about, huh? But not the most? So does that mean someone has me beat? What’d they say? Can’t you see, I’m on the edge of my seat.” 

[leoxeverett-archive]

reellykenzie‌:

“Well, do you want to learn?” she questioned him as she got out a different brush and began to use it on the horse’s flank. “Not volunteering to teach you by the way since you seem to hate me. But some of the other people on the team or the teacher who runs the club could teach you,” she added before he could complain.

“Not really,” He repeated, in the same exact dry and disengaged tone as the previous. “The last time I was on a horse, I was with my dad, and he had a heart attack all of the sudden, fell off the horse, and died right before my eyes... So I’m sure you could imagine my apprehension of getting back on again. Brings up too many memories.” He told her, keeping the monotone and almost mumbling tone. He paused to look at her for a moment, scanning for a reaction. “Kidding. I just don’t have any interest in someone giving me any more instructions.” 

[leoxeverett-archive]

jxnechang‌:

June sat with her hands in her head massaging her temples trying to make the pounding stop “I could but I do t think I physically can” she said in a litter as she continued rubbing her head “Figured I’d see if someone was willing to help a girl out.”

He simply raised his brow at her, as if her wish was absolutely ridiculous. “Well maybe someone is, but that someone certainly is not me.” 

[leoxeverett-archive]

liadavenport‌:

“Are you seriously giving me shit for not causing myself physical pain by literally ripping my hair out?” Though the words left her incredulously, she couldn’t honestly say that she was surprised. It was Leo, for god’s sake. His whole thing was giving her shit and trying to make her feel bad, at least that was what it felt like every time they spent more than a few minutes in the same room together. The funny thing was, she couldn’t even find it in herself to be as annoyed with him as she typically was, given that her mind was choosing to stay focused on the thoughts she wanted nothing more than to ignore. She couldn’t help but to think that she was a chicken. Maybe it would be easier if decided to “step into the light”, be the one to rip off the mask she wore every single day of her life. The Circle had made a good point, as much as she didn’t want to admit it– last night, she’d been the most herself that she had ever been. As ironic as it was, the mask had made her feel like she didn’t have to hide… and now, here she was, hiding, again. “I do stay true to my word, except for when I’m joking, which I was, so…” She trailed off, lifting her shoulders into a shrug as though to say “such is life”. 

“Does that surprise you?” He asked, mostly rhetorically. It wasn’t even that he wanted her to as she stated it cause herself physical pain. He just wanted to give her shit. It was like an odd way of coping... pouring all of his energy on making her miserable for whenever they interacted somehow made him feel less miserable. Or at the very least distracted from what was making him miserable in the first place. He saw all of this as nothing but a fun game to pass the time. ‘Course he knew it was wrong to push people down and belittle them just because he was too weak to face his own problems. He knew a lot of things he did were considered to be wrong... he had a conscious, though that definitely would probably come to a shock to some. But did he listen to that conscious? Rarely... The times he did, it was usually after the fact, specifically late at night as he would reflect. And even with those sleepless nights where he would just lay awake, reflecting... and hating himself for causing so much pain... for the thoughts in his head... for just how little he seems to be able to control himself and his mind... despite all of that, he never apologized for any of it. “Hm... funny joke. So hey, which secret was yours? I don’t think you were the one who cheated... you’re a lot of things, but I wouldn’t peg you for a cheater...” Course there was always the possibility that her secret wasn’t one of them, or that she didn’t have a secret at all! Though that last one was.... almost impossible in his eyes. everyone had a secret. Everyone was always hiding something. 

[leoxeverett-archive]

reellykenzie‌:

“Well, sometimes it happens. You just caught me in here today,” she said with a shrug, brushing out the horse some more. “You ride?” she asked the other as Dalton moved closer to see who it was, curious about who was interrupting his relaxation time probably. 

Leo kicked the floor a bit, making it somewhat clean for him to take a seat. Once he got in a comfortable sitting position, he pulled the sketchbook from his bag and started drawing Dalton. “Not really,” He answered simply, still keeping his drawing quite loose and gestural for the time being. He’d build it up and get the detail later-- for now he was just doing a few sketches to warm up. 

[leoxeverett-archive]

liadavenport‌:

Why was it that whenever she was in an awful mood, Leo seemed to be waiting there and ready to strike? The thought made her roll her eyes at herself because she was aware of how dramatic she was being, but honestly, Leo was the very last person she wanted to speak to when she felt like this. He was actually the very last person she wanted to speak to ever, but that was beside the point. Still, she felt her lips twitch as he carried on, and found herself weirdly thankful that the lights were out because she didn’t want him to see that she was slightly amused. Only slightly. “Not yet. Sorry to disappoint, but I’m certain that the longer I sit here with you, the more likely I will be to rip my hair out at some point so stay tuned.” She huffed, blowing air out between her teeth as she looked at him. She could make out his silhouette thanks to the light coming off her phone, but that was about it. Not that she cared. She’d be okay with just pretending he wasn’t there. 

Leo grabbed a book lamp and clamped it to his sketchbook-- there. That was much better. Not only was the light brighter, making it easier to draw, but also he had two free hands! One to hold the sketchbook steady, and one to draw. “That is disappointing,” He commented through a sigh. “Apology not accepted. People should always stay true to their word, Lia.” After everything that had happened... after knowing somehow someone else knew his secret... after spending the rest of that night and most of the current day panicking and trying to figure out how to keep it a secret, at least to everyone else... After all of that, he almost felt as though he deserved to have a little fun in giving her shit. 

[leoxeverett-archive]

TROY ✉️ LEO

Troy: Fine, fine. Two dollars is my final offer.

Troy: Like what? What's more important?

Leo: Nope.

Leo: I don't know... maybe I could be planning revenge on whoever is behind this absurd thing.

[liadavenport]

“If I hear one more person complain about their phone being dead, I’m going to rip my hair out,” Lia groaned as she made herself comfortable in the common area, while checking her own phone to make sure that it was still alive. Which she was aware made her a hypocrite, but her phone was the last source of entertainment she had left. Sure, she had an absurd amount of books littering the bookshelves in her room, but it was incredibly difficult to read without an adequate source of light and as it turned out, shining a flashlight with one hand and holding the book in the other was not all that comfortable. That, and reading, in general, was proving difficult because her mind just wasn’t in it. She couldn’t seem to focus, which wasn’t any different than usual, except… This time, what she couldn’t stop thinking about was that they knew. Her secret wasn’t a secret, at least not to the jerks who were wreaking havoc on this school. “There was a time when people didn’t have phones,” she continued after a brief pause, mostly to get out of her own head. “I doubt anyone at this school could have survived back then, although I suppose they wouldn’t have known what they were missing, but whatever.” ( @luxorstarters​ ) 

[leoxeverett-archive]

Leo was in the common area, shining a flashlight on his sketchbook as he drew. A small smirk tugged on his features as he heard Lia voice her complaints. He let her finish her rant, a true gentleman. He actually found truth to what she was saying. People were way beyond dependent on their phones and technology, and it was just one of the many of the ways humanity was falling apart in front of their very eyes. Though despite he agreed, he couldn’t resist doing what he did best- being the obnoxious little shit he was. “Oh fuck I can’t believe my phone died! Whatever am I going to do? My world is ending. Tell my family I love them, because I can’t go on without my phone!” He paused to glance over at Lia, or at least where he thought was Lia. “Have you ripped your hair out yet?”