I was always out playing. With Lizzie, mostly. Up and down Mare street, nicking whelks off the one-eyed man with the seafood stall. And sheโd distract him by asking for a pint of prawns and a blank stare and Iโd blindside him and pocket a fistful of cockles. Oh, I adored Lizzie! And she adored me. Every night, when we dragged ourselves away from each other, Iโd say, โCash or cheque?โ And sheโd say, โCash.โ And Iโd get a kiss on the cheek.
Our favourite game was wedding day. She was always the bride, of course, and I would be the groom. Iโd get my dadโs best coat. Grey tweed, leather buttons, smell of sweat, coal. Bits of dried-up tobacco in the breast pocket. Iโd have to wait for her at the end of the aisle, the back alley where our mothers would hang the washing. And Iโd watch her, holding my breath, as she picked her way through the grey sheets and stained drawers, a huge, stupid smile on her face. And when she reached me and put her arm through mineโฆ I fair exploded. I loved her. I knew that. I longed to take her in my arms and kiss her neck. Would she allow it? Could she? I just didnโt know.
Then bloody William Foyle turned up. All big muscles, crooked smile and twinkly-eyed. And she fell for him straightaway. He bought her a tuppence bag of aniseed balls and she was lost. I was heartbroken. She still said โcashโ when we did manage to see each other, butโฆ I could see her heart wasnโt in it. She looked sad. But not for her, for me. โDonโt be like that, Ellen,โ sheโd say. Touching my arm. Once, she took me in. She took pity on me. And we sat by the fire. I had my arms wrapped around her waist. Andโฆ I just let my hand drop lower and lower until it was resting in her glorious lap. I moved my hand slowly, slowly. She frozeโฆ then relaxed. I waited. Minutes groaned by. She let me. Sheโฆ let me. And then, all of a sudden, she jumped up, grabbed her shawl and ran out the back door. I called after her, but she didnโt turn back. It was exactly two weeks later than I ran into her buying a loaf of bread. โLizzie,โ I said, โIโm sorry. Please, please speak to me.โ โDonโt,โ she said. She sort of hissed it. I searched her face for a sign of softness, but there was none. There was only fear. Only fear. She turned on her heel and marched off.
annaxmalina
origamiaround
vaporwave
areudirty
snowghoul
izzy806
prguitarman
discoholicmusic
gummygunk
