Catra’s second guessing about Adora leaving the Horde
I just realized something about Catra in season 1 - episode 3:
Right after she has a breakdown and rips Adora’s pillow while crying, she’s interrupted by Shadow Weaver who scolds her for being insolent. That’s when Catra says:
“Adora’s gone. She defected. And I’m starting to think she had the right idea.”
First off, she defends her, in her own way and has to be sneaky about it because Shadow Weaver will probably torture her or reprimand her for being weak otherwise, since she didn’t go after her. Of course at this point, she’s hurt, because from her own blurred perspective it seems like Adora straight up abandoned her, and the whole Horde for that matter, and that “if she wanted to come home she’d be here right now.”
However, secondly, I think it’s super important to note that at this moment Catra actually is starting to second guess herself in that just maybe she should have gone after Adora and leaving the Horde too.
What really makes her snap though, therefore making her want to stay (perhaps not the ultimate snapping point of course), stems from her inferiority complex (lack of self-worth) and abandonment issues. Once Lord Hordak goes against Shadow Weaver’s advice to go after Adora and not promote Catra to take her place as Force Captain, he chooses to stand by Catra. This enlarges Catra’s ego and sense of self-worth and starts giving her a purpose. She wants to be above S.W. who has abused her her entire life. Furthermore, she stifles a laugh when Hordak reprimands S.W. and insists on promoting Catra to force captain.
What’s interesting here is that Catra has a dire need to be loved and needed, and although she and Catra were both abused they were both abused in different ways, and with S.W.’s manipulation she played both girls against each other to the point where they didn’t fully know the extent they were abused. Similarly, Adora also has a dire need to be loved and needed, just in a slightly different way. Adora fulfills her sense of self-worth by taking care of others, protecting them, saving them, having a higher purpose.
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