this is not what i do

run,run,runaway buy yourself another day A cold wind's whispering secrets in your ear So low only you can hear indie fem!peter pettigrew

[littlerxt]

Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 Truths about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

Tagged by: iugulat

• WHAT WAS YOUR: Last Beverage:  ginger ale Last phone call: mom Last text message: ”Don't need a ride today either way.” Last song you listened to: From Shadows - RWBY Last time you cried: like yesterday

• HAVE YOU EVER:

Dated someone twice: no 
Been cheated on: no Kissed someone and regretted it: no Lost someone special: no Been depressed: yes Been drunk and threw up: no

• LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS: purple, blue, orange

• LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU: Made a new friend: yeah Fallen out of love: no Laughed until you cried: yes Met someone who changed you: no Found out who your true friends are: yeah Found out someone was talking about you: yes

• GENERAL: How many people on your FB friends list do you know in real life: all

• FIRSTS: First surgery: sinus/nasal First piercing: ears First best friend: a girl named raven who moved First sport you joined: t-ball First vacation: maryland First pair of trainers: ??? uhm. like. velcro lightups i guess?

• RIGHT NOW: Eating: no Drinking: no I’m about to: do replies maybe Waiting for: stop feeling sick

• YOUR FUTURE: Want kids: nnno Get married: meh Career: professional cat lady

• WHICH IS BETTER: Lips or eyes: eyes Hugs or Kisses: hugs Shorter or Taller: taller Older or younger: dont care Romantic or Spontaneous: romantic Nice stomach or nice arms: literally dont care Sensitive or Loud: sensitive i guess Hook-up or relationship: neither woops Trouble maker or hesitant: hesitant

• HAVE YOU EVER: Kissed a stranger: no Drank hard liquor: no Lost glasses/contacts: no Sex on first date: no Broke someones heart: woops yeah Arrested: no Turned someone down: yeah Cried when someone died: yeah Fallen for a friend: ma  y e be 

•DO YOU BELIEVE IN: Yourself: eh Miracles:eh Love at first sight: nah Heaven: m a y b e??????????? Santa Claus: no Kiss on the first date: let's just cuddle always Angels: ????? r e li g io n c o nf use s m e ??????

Tagging: i dont tag people in anything woops if you want to i guess.

[iugulat-deactivated20141123]

   ◤ℬ. ℒ. ◢  

               ❝ of course not, you little fool.                   our orders were to arrive together.                   unless you think you know better                   than the dark lord himself. ❞

[littlerxt]

                "no, no! of. of course not.                  it's just that i supposed—                  it would be better for us t-t'                  arrive on time rather than the                  th-three of us late."

[scaledd]

                                      they stand                                in their atmosphere                                  where they gasp                                      and beg for                                             air

[inboxideas]

Your character was held down, and forced to watch mine mercilessly beaten. How does this scene affect them?

[rus-califi]

Visit Original Link

Beware that the light is fading. Beware as the dark returns. This world’s unforgiving. Even brilliant lights will cease to burn.

Legends scatter. Day and night will sever. Hope and peace are lost forever.

[littlerxt]

                "d'you have the potions essay?                  i. i have mine done, but i just.                  'm not sure about this part."

[cxritas-blog]

In a universe where everyone is born with numbers on their wrists counting down to when they’ll meet their soulmate, send me 00:00:00 for my muses reaction to their numbers hitting zero when they meet yours.

[cervosx-blog]

                                              “Sorry, then.”

And he’s the one apologizing now, but she does have a point. Out of the three of them, it’s only ever been Sirius to see the side of him that wasn’t putting on a show of bravery and confidence. He’s seen all of them break and was always there to offer a joke and a slap on the back, even if it killed him to see them like that. But it is rare it works the other way around, even with Lily.

                            “Mate, I don’t think any                                  of us really are. The                           person who can look this                 war in the face and come away                         unscathed ‘s only insane.”

Maybe the rest of them, who only see that  in him, think he’s mad. But it’s better if they think he’s mad, and not that he’s slowly  losing hope. What good would that be?  James has always been carefree and that’s what’s expected.

                                 ”Oi, don’t go growin’ a                           beard and talking in riddles                                                  on me now,”

he laughed, knocking their shoulders together.

[littlerxt]

                "if 'm not allowed to apologize, you                  can't either."           it's quiet, but she gives a small smile. she           doesn't want him to apologize because it           pulls at her chest and makes her head ache           a bit. james potter doesn't apologize like           that. he's not like that. her head tips back           to look up as he speaks, lips pursed slightly           and shoulders hunching a bit.                 "yeah. still. i just wish i could be...better.                  i guess."           she should be quiet. should stop talking and           just listen to him. it would be smart to do that,           but she's never been known for being very           clever. so a tight smile stays on pattie's lips           and grows a little wider at the joke and the           friendly bumping of shoulders.                 "i'll do my best."

[wildflower-x-heart]

My self-hate is so deep, so palpable, I fear I’ll lunge at my own image, shatter the glass and cut myself with shards of broken reflection.

Jax Teller (via ironmxde)

[cervosx-blog]

                          “Quit with that sorry shite. It’s                                  not your fault. I’m just…”

James sighs, lifting his hand to run his fingers through his hair. Such a familiar gesture, but it hasn’t been to look stylish in years. A nervous habit by this point, really.

                        “I’m not going to tell the others.                   They’ve got enough on their plates                                                            already.”

Alice and Frank are expecting as well and they didn’t need more than that. They are all struggling, like Pattie said. They’d come to him, sometimes,  and it only ever makes things worse for him. But he is supposed to be the strong one. It never crosses their minds that he might be living a hell of his own too.

                       ”But ah, I’ll quit bothering you                    with this dark talk. I’m sure you’ve                         got more interesting things on                                                      your mind.”

And it isn’t a dismissal. Maybe an offer for her to get whatever she needs off her chest, though he doubts she will. Wormtail has always kept more to herself.

[littlerxt]

                "i don't mean t'be. harsh or anything.                  you're allowed to feel that way but,                  but it's just sort of. 'ss weird, seeing                  you like this."           and for once it's not a lie slipping from           her tongue as she looks at him, brows           still furrowed together and hands fidgeting           in her lap before reaching up to tuck a           strand of hair behind her ear because it's           fallen in her face.                 "...not really. just like for this to be over.                  it's all so, so. like you said, it's hard, and                  'm not much good at hard things."           she would like for it to be over. to have this           war won. maybe she can advocate on their           side, tell the dark lord how much use the potters           could be. remus could be. he could join greyback           maybe. james and lily are both so talented with           a wand and james can rally any crowd. sirius is           probably a lost cause, but maybe. maybe they           can all be happy again, at the end?           it's a childish hope. they're all lost causes. too           softhearted, too glued to doing 'the right thing'.           but it helps her sleep at night, so.                 "doesn't do much good t'dwell on it, right?                  sounds like something dumbledore'd say."

[cervosx-blog]

                            “Yeah? Well I bloody well                                       wish they wouldn’t.”

And it’s ironic, really. He’d spent so much of his time trying to impress others, get them to want to follow him. He’d been cruel, had done quite a number of stupid things, just to gain that. And it turns out all it takes,  was risking your life. And he doesn’t want it. The responsibility is too heavy. He can’t pretend at no emotions, like some of the others. He isn’t strong enough and he  doesn’t know how he ever thought he was.

                 ”I wouldn’t say this to Lily,                  or to anyone but the three                   of you. Pat, you can’t tell                  me this is all easy for you.                   It’s fucking horrible and if                I can’t tell you then who am                           I supposed to trust?”

[littlerxt]

                "sorry."           it's automatic, soft and quick under her           breath. but she's...it's confusing. they all           love him. james potter. he might as well           wear a cape, he's their hero. and used to           be hers, too. how can he not like that? how           can he want them to turn their eyes from           him? that's all she wants. to be noticed.           to be powerful. respected. all the things he's           always been. and to hear him denounce it           like that is odd to her.                 "'ss not easy on anyone, james. not                  supposed to be. if it was easy it wouldn't                  be called war."           she shrugs and looks down st her hands. well.           he certainly shouldn't be trusting her. why is           he? why isn't he talking to sirius or remus about           this? or lily, the one he's married to? why her?           that thought is quieted, though. the rest are busy.           or he doesn't want to weigh his true friends down           with these thoughts. that's all.                 "'course you can tell me. that's not what i. sorry.                  that's not what i meant. but if the others—                  marlene and the longbottoms and bones'...                  if they catch wind they might stop hoping.                  y'know? it'll spread."

[cervosx-blog]

                          “If I don’t fight and if I give up, then                                    what’s to say no one else will?                                    Whether or not winning seems                             possible, can’t just give up. There’s                           Lily, and our kid, and there’s you lot                        too. It’d be giving up on you, wouldn’t                                                                              it?”

He doesn’t know, if they can win. It seems impossible some days. And it feels like the world is going to end and that giving up is the only option. But he knows  better. He’s James Potter and he doesn’t give up. Not on people he loves. Lily’s a Muggleborn. Their child will be a half blood. Remus, is a half blood. To give up, would be to allow people like them to be killed, over so little.

[littlerxt]

          it's funny, a muggleborn being the dark lord's           spy. but it helps, it helps hide what she's doing.           why would she want to help them? but really,           why should she pledge allegiance to people           she doesn't care about? so many of her problems           stem from the muggles she was raised by and           around. wipe them all out. why should she care?                 "guess so. but if y'don't have faith it'll                  all work out you're not— you won't be.                  ugh."           a small sound of annoyance slips through her           lips and a hand comes up to tug at her hair a           bit, leaning forwards to hunch over slightly. a           position she feels far more comfortable in.                 "it's all useless if we don't believe in't,                  right? you've gotta believe in this. or                  it's all gonna fall apart. at least try keeping                  a stiff upper lip, yeah? in front of the others?                  they all look up't you."

[dylanagainsthumanity]

Would losing me even be a loss?

(via messengr)

[creepingdread]

you destroy yourself.

so others won’t get the chance. (via nightxmxre)

[cervosx-blog]

                         ”That’s a nice sentiment, Wormtail.                                       If only it were actually true,                            it might be a bit more comforting.”

And why shouldn’t he go to her about this? It’s what friends do, and perhaps he’d feel a bit bad about burdening people, but shared experiences make it harder to clam up about it. It had almost been fun, at first. Thrilling, to have his life on the line and to know he was fighting for something worthwhile. But then  friends had started dying, and it wasn’t a game anymore. Lily got pregnant, and suddenly he had more to worry  about than himself.

[littlerxt]

                "why're you still fighting if y'think                  that, then? what's the point? if                  you're..."           her voice wavers and she sighs, leaning           back and putting her weight on her hands,           outstretched behind her.                 "why bother fighting for something                  you don't think is possible,?"           she tilts her head to look at him, brow furrowed           and eyes wide as fingers tap nervously. it's           not easy for her, to push lies through her lips,           but it's not as hard as it should because she           knows he doesn't care about her. not like the           others. none of them do. never did.           and maybe the death eaters don't care about           her but with them at least she has the chance           to rise to the top. anyways, even if she wanted           to turn back, she can't. not now. it's too late for           second thoughts and the mark on her left arm,           always hidden by jumper or jacket now a days,           is a testament to that.

[cervosx-blog]

                         ”What faith is there left               to lose, Pat? My chin’s staying                  right where it is. This bloody                             war is ruining us all.”

Whatever happened to the days where nothing mattered but impressing girls  and making the biggest explosion?

[littlerxt]

                "faith that we can win? 'cause                  that's all we've got left, right?                  we can do it, james. y'just. you                  can't forget that. if you don't let                  it ruin you it can't, right?"           it's laughable. her saying that to him. she's           the ruined one, isn't she? that's what people           would say. she's the bad guy and him the hero.           as always. but her brow furrows and she looks           at him with concern in her eyes because that's           what friends do. they're falling apart, if the           unshakable james potter feels that way. she           can't say it's a bad thing. if they lose faith they           lose the will to fight. with that gone there's nothing           to hold the dark lord back.

[ceruos]

              — he’d never been the best with healing spells,                    but that was exactly what he was trying. james potter                    had also never been the best with heeding advice, let                    alone advice pertaining to personal safety.

                                                                      now in the order’s headquarters, he was                                                                       fresh off of the battlefield, and tending to                                                                       his injuries. injuries he shouldn’t have even                                                                       sustained, but the needs of the many outweighed                                                                       the needs of the few. death eaters having                                                                       numerous hostages wasn’t something he                                                                       would allow himself take lightly — but was                                                                       able to handle on his own, for the most part.

                                                                                  —-    a knock at the door brought him                                                                                                                   back to the present.

                         ❝ — I’ll just be another minute. ❞

[littlerxt]

          it's not easy. fighting a war from one side           while actually fighting it on the other with           no one noticing. no one seeing through it           all. no one calling her out on feeding it all           from the order to the death eaters. but it'll           pay off in the end. that's what they tell her.           it'll all pay off in the end once they've won.           she'll be one of his right hand people. one           with power and influence. people will be           standing in her shadow for once.           but she can't let it show. so here she stands,           hesitating in the doorway. it's not that she           wants them to get hurt. james and sirius and           remus. but what must be done must be done.           this isn't a quidditch game. this is a war. and           there will be casualties.                  "james? people're wondering if you're                  alright? you shouldn't have—"                      and here her voice warbles slightly and she            gives a soft, nervous sort of sigh as she fiddles            with her fingers, folding and unfolding them            over and over again.                 "...'m not gonna lecture. you okay?"