average adult friendship

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@loridisea
average adult friendship
til death do us apart.. or whatever 🩷
Regulus: *mumbling in Latin*
Sirius: For the LAST TIME, I am not a demon and you cannot exorcise me.
Regulus, dropping the book on the table with a sigh: Worth a try.
then there was one
harry potter’s dead dad and sirius black’s little brother take up too much space in my head to be normal or healthy
Growing up I always hoped I’d be as cheerful as James, as smart as Remus and as confident as Sirius.
I ended up with the mental health of Regulus Black.
"that didnt happen in canon" and canon didnt happen at all, what is your point
I guess we are coming back to Tumblr?
nobody say a fucking word about tumblr we can’t remind these billionaires we exist
the bitches traumatized by saltburn would never survive the fics in my ao3 history
SPOILERS 3RD ACT ARCANE
Ekko to Jixn: Maybe in another life we'll be together
Viktor to Jayce: Listen here bitch, I'll end the world as many times as necessary until you choose me
"My child is fine." Your child is reading the angstiest fanfics about Harry Potter's dead parents and their friends on purpose.
“this ship isn’t canon” to YOU. I, however, am delusional
"Not every ship has to be gay!"
Girl you're using TUMBLR. THE gayland. What did you expect?
Listen, I love and appreciate the people trying to map out the logic behind tommy’s piloting career, but let’s be real guys s8 is about to open with an honest to god bee-nado, I can suspend my disbelief enough to think it was tommy flying the plane in 2x14.
Since the OP made their post unrebloggable (and blocked me. Both actions they are well in with their right to do)
I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important
-
As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around
When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry
I had to change that in order to keep those friendships
When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.
So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship
It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.
That's called "living in a society"
People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you
You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises
I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes
There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"
And that's a recipe for disaster
Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do
However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational
We live in a society and we as people change each other as we interact and that isn't necessarily a bad thing
Since the OP made their post unrebloggable (and blocked me. Both actions they are well in with their right to do)
I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important
-
As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around
When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry
I had to change that in order to keep those friendships
When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.
So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship
It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.
That's called "living in a society"
People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you
You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises
I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes
There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"
And that's a recipe for disaster
Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do
However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational
We live in a society and we as people change each other as we interact and that isn't necessarily a bad thing