âá° spiderman x fem!reader
âá° syn: you and peter agree to wind down and make dinner for each other after his workload has been taking up all the time he could be with you. but you become anxious that he canât commit to his promise. you call him and when he answers, you overhear a conversation you werenât supposed to hear.
âá° a.n: domestic fluff, emotional traumas, cheating, angst. Iâm honestly not the best at writing, making these to hopefully get better. For no reason, I need a hobby. Itâs my first fic, be niceâŠplease.
You werenât anyone to judge, but everything was hard for you to do deal with alone. Nonetheless, you were patient. For a few days, days turned into a weeks and then months, then eventually you had enough. But there was a pit in your stomach, a feeling you couldnât shake. It over took your mind and sent it swirling, your heart wired to his. You felt guilty to feel this way. You know itâs hard for him to handle too.
Your teeth peeled the skin from your lips. You were attempting to calm yourself, your thoughts. The TV playing for the past hour and still you heard nothing from it. Today, you planned something with Peter, at 7pm the two of you are going to make dinner at your apartment, watch a movie, and if luck is on your side sleep soundly.
Spiderman was someone every kid looked up to and happened to be what the city officials entrusted their security to. It is an honor to him, with all the blood, sweat, and sleepless nights they city of Queens give their respects to him.
The clock hit 6:45, thereâs still no sign of Peter. You gathered the ingredients out of the paper bag, it was his idea to make Singapore curry noodles.
Your eyes flickering at the clock on the white stove the apartment complex gifted you. The apartment came furnished, with a few things the old renter didnât take. You read 6:57, and all the vegetables laid out on the kitchen counter, you straighten up the red bell pepper and let out a sigh.
The wind chime rung softly to the breeze of the night sky. You look over at your empty window, pausing for a moment that maybe heâd slip through. Youâre left with nothing. The porcelain clatter against the metal once more. You sigh, âwhy make this difficult for meâ
You grab your phone, unlocking it and staring at Peterâs last message he sent. A selfie of him with his mask pressed against a wine bottle.
Get it? Wind down⊠wine.. :P love you
You received it at 6:07, the sun setting in the picture. You glance over at the dark sky outside the window. The time is now 7:05.
Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip as the pad of your finger pressed the phone icon. It started to ring.
On the other end, Peter felt his phone vibrate. In the distance, cans clanked on the New York floors, residents preparing for trash day tomorrow.
âYou couldnât pick any other day to chase me down?â He says through the mask, keeping his distance.
Felicia smirks, âspidey, I missed you, lifeâs not the same without youâ her heels echo. Peter sat against the wooden box at the top of an apartment building.
âThatâs because itâs different now,â Peter states âIâm in a relationship now, you know that.â
She giggles, âthat didnât stop us before, why now?â
He felt a bubble form in his throat, annoyed at her response. It will forever haunt him as long as sheâs alive. He was dumb and angry; Mary-Jane, his ex, did not cooperate with his lifestyle. She didnât know, of course, he contemplated on telling her multiple times. But she was already too stubborn to talk to in general.
Felicia Hardy, stealthily entangled with Peter after a harsh argument he had with Mary-Jane, he regretted it the morning after. It was wrong of him and he knew it too. Since that day, he still doesnât know what got over him. After she broke up with him, he laid low, focusing on his studies and saving lives. He wasnât planning on entering the dating world after his unfaithfulness.
âI have important places to beâ Peter picks up the wine bottle from the abandoned box, he turns away from her. âSheâs different, Felicia, donât get in the way.â
âSheâs differentâ she emphasizes, âis my good boy spidey the same?â
âI was young, Felicia,â the defeat in his voice, âwhy canât you just bug off?â He was interrupted by a gust of wind, he can see the sparkle in her blue eyes and her hips sway closer to him.
âYou donât mean that, love, do you?â As her hand reaches for his chin, he shrugs her away.
It takes him a while to say something, and with everything else you heard from the phone you couldnât wait any longer for a response. Your heart pulses in your ears, your hand quivering over your mouth. You hung up and dropping your phone on the faux suede couch. Cheating is not something you take lightly, it haunts you from your previous relationship.
But Peter, heâs patient, and aware of your anxious attachment. He doesnât blame you for it, he knows youâve been cheated on in the past and heâs always been there to relieve your mind when it takes over. He told you he was Spiderman a year into the relationship, because you sobbed in his lap about your frustrations. He didnât know how youâd take it, at first you didnât believe him, you didnât want him to think you were naive. But he took you for a swing, and explained what happens when he puts on the mask.
For a while, you were calm, heâd visit you occasionally and cuddle you to sleep. You became his safe space. After a few battles that left him bruised and scrapped, heâd go to you and youâd patch him up, sewing up open wounds. You learned quicker than your colleagues in nursing school.
But these flare ups, they made you feel insane, like instinctively you knew not to let your guard down. Guilt won overtime, but after peter accidentally answered your call⊠you knew to trust your gut feeling.
You werenât mad at Peter, he didnât say anything wrong, but he didnât tell you his wrongs either. Well, he can say itâs none of your business, but had you known heâs had a history of cheating, things would be different.
But did you want things to be different?
Your vision is blurry and you choke on your breath. You wipe your tears away, âoh god,â you sob. You stay seated on your couch, the commercials buzz, but you pull your legs up to your chest and cry.
Thereâs nothing to do of this situation, heâs not in the wrong. You canât help but to think youâre way over your head, the woman sounded comfortable. Her giggle, you can remember it. Sheâs sexy, you know it.
âSorry Iâm late!â Peter hops through the window, âI was trying to find an outfit to match the occasion, then I grabbed another for tomorrowââ
He set the wine down on the bar counter, his head snaps at the sound of your sniffling. He rushes over, âheyâ his voice is soft as he takes a seat beside you. The warmth of his arms bring you closer to his chest. âWhatâs got you down, y/n? Was it me?â
You feel the stronger urge to sob, but you shake your head, you want to ignore it. âIâm sorry, I-I justâŠâ you stand up avoiding his eyes âI missed you, thatâs all.â
He watches you walk to the kitchen, shoulders stiff and your pace quickened. His eyes flinch at the sound of you lying, âIâm sorry to keep you waitingâ he sees you grab a pan out of the oven and place it on the stove.
He gets up from the couch, his eyes land on your phone faced down on the floor. He bends over to pick it up, the screen lights up, the time is now 7:37 and youâve got one notification about your internships schedule. He sets the phone on the coffee table and walks to you. His arms snake around your waist, âI missed youâ he whispers, his chin resting on your shoulder.
You shrug him off, I missed you. Her voice echoed through your head.
His eyebrows stitched, âwhat did I do, y/n? Tell me.â
You grab the cutting board, and place the green bell pepper against it. You cut the stem off, slicing it in half as he asks you. You donât respond, still conflicted if you should mention it.
He waits for you to say something, but you continue to prepare dinner. He hears your heart beating at second quicker than your normal rhythm. He wishes he could hear your thoughts, he knows youâre thinking about something.
âI really tried to get here on timeââ
âItâs not about that,â you finally speak âPeter.â
His name used as a period, he feels his stomach churn. He knows something isnât right. He feared it, as crime begins to pick up, heâs dealing with something more difficult. An anti-hero who he manages to always get in the way. Itâs taking up a lot of his time, he senses youâd become impatient someday. He canât help but to think, you have every right to feel that way. He sees the way you see things and he fears you donât carry the same amount of patience he does.
You hesitate to finish slicing the other half of the bell pepper, just like youâre hesitating to bring up the conversation you overheard. You bit your lip and close your eyes, you know itâd bring you relief to know more about her.
âWho is she, Peter?â Your voice cracks.
Heâs puzzled, thatâs the last thing heâd expect you to ask. âThereâs no one else, y/nâ
He bites his tongue, you responded too quick and he suspects you know of the black cat that lingers behind him. Heâs cautious, âsheâs no one.â
You put the knife down, your eyes fill with tears in reaction to his response. He lunges at you, âlet me explainâ he repeated but you felt your nerves start to send you in a panic.
âI called you,â you admitted âdid you know that?â
He shakes his head, âI didnâtâŠâ
âI heard everything.â
He doesnât say anything, he knows exactly what you heard. âI wanted to tell you⊠but it justâŠâ
You tried to brush past him but he grabbed onto you, âyou told me about you getting cheated on and I got scared.â
âI donât even know what to sayâ you didnât want to blame him for his past mistakes, heâs learned from them. But you couldnât shake this anxious feeling on top of that.
âIâm different, y/nâ his voice is hoarse, âyouâre someone I donât want to loose. Please, hear me out.â
You steady your breathing and nod. Flushed from your ruminating thoughts, your hands are holding your warm cheeks as he explains. She definitely was someone youâd fear, you have every right to, because everything you thought, she was 10x more. But Peters voice was stern and believing when he says he regretted ever interacting with her.
âI love you,â he sighed pulling you in for a hug, âIâm sorry I donât get to say that enough.â
âSeconds! Every second you should hear me say it because I truly mean it. IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou.â He shakes his head âeven still, Iâm not saying it enough.â
You chuckle and to him, thatâs a relief. You look into his eyes and heâs in awe. âI love youâ he whispers again as his lips hover over yours, he kisses you slowly. His hands sliding down, caressing small of your back.
âI wanna hear you say itâ he smiles into the kiss and you do. A mumble out of your mouth, his lips are fighting your words, but he hears you.
He pulls his head back, âIâm hungryâ he whines.
You shake your head with a smile, âWhine? Before preparing dinner?â You joked.
His laugh warmed your heart, âI knew you liked that one.â
© luvmoonstar : lowkenuinely. . . meow
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