I’m a lover by nature except for when I’m a wretched hater cunt bitch which I also am by nature
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@madamechampignon
I’m a lover by nature except for when I’m a wretched hater cunt bitch which I also am by nature
My husband’s job primarily employs adult men but there is one (1) teenage girl and my husband said originally he worried she might be a bit of an outcast but instead every man on the crew was like “huh guess I am a dad/older brother now.”
She was in a car crash on the way to work one morning and called my husband to let him know she’d be late and he was like wtf guess I’m gonna be late too because I’m coming to pick you up and then he told his team and they were like I think you mean WE are coming.
Imagine you are a teenage girl probably rushing to get to work and you crash your probably new car and feel absolutely miserable and now you’ll be late to work but then suddenly in the distance a car full of all the adult men you work with just pulls up and is like “we came all the way here to pick you up” the mental image right now is fr.
Apparently she tried to call her dad but it was 3am and he was obviously sleeping so she called my husband and he not only came to find her but fished her glasses out of the hood of the car (she’d dropped them while looking inside), drove her to the hospital, and told her to take the day off. She insisted on coming back to work so he used his lunch break to watch TV with her to make sure she didn’t doze off (concussion risk).
You’ve heard of the Mom friend but my husband is very much the Dad friend. He said when he answered the phone she said “hey please don’t be mad” and he’s never felt such powerful Fatherhood energy in his life.
Girl: *calls for aid*
Every single dad packed into the car:
This is possibly my favorite response to this post
This girls father: Thanks for helping my daughter out guys
Your husband and all his coworkers:
The anti-Cruella de Ville.
Finding out that Captain America 3 was originally meant to be a direct sequel the The Winter Soldier and would’ve focused on Steve and Sam’s search for Bucky, with a focus on Steve and Bucky’s relationship, but was scrapped for Civil War because DC released Batman vs Superman has actually ruined my day. Probably my week.
I’m so upset right now, what the hell.
She literally does not give a damn what that old fool is yelling about
the lion does not concern herself with papa
the desire to engage in my hobbies leaving my body as soon as I have the day off even though I was looking forward to it all week
went to my best friend’s house last night and saw a little plushie dog and plushie cat that had been sewn together down the middle into a two-headed chimera. I said, “did you do that?” she said, “yes, I saved them.”
turns out at her old job when the last two plushies hadn’t sold and became deadstock, her boss told her to cut them up and throw them out. so she cut them each in half, preserved their heads, and then rebuilt them together.
cannot stop thinking about the way these little plushies were approached with the instinct of a Vampire or some sort of ancient god. “Let me save you [turn you into a monster].”
The fact that the beheading was at the order of a superior, and the solution was to create some sort of monster of disobediance to the letter of the law instead of just lying and saving them adds a certain mythological resonance.
Has anyone else noticed that they do this?
literally real life though
how your 20s feel when you dont know what ur doing
working on a tshirt/ print design
Harrison Wood Hsiang
reject modernity (enjolras actors in any way acknowledging enjoltaire) embrace tradition (“I remember thinking of talking to Aaron about the subject as we started filming, and as I was about to talk to him he was interrupted by someone else, and then suddenly I understood. That was the perfect example of what the dynamic between us should be. And I realised that actually NOT talking to Aaron about it at all was the perfect way to create that subtextual thing between Grantaire and Enjolras. And actually, I didn’t talk to anyone about it. Not even Tom. I just kept it a secret and thought that if people can read into it, great, and if people don’t notice it, that’s also fine because it’s not the main focus of the student plot. I still don’t know to this day if Aaron even knows about the whole E/R relationship, but it doesn’t matter, because I don’t think Enjolras should.”)
hope in john green‘s ’turtles all the way down‘
I miss when everyone on my dash listened to Welcome to Night Vale so there’s be a good chance that on any ole day someone would reblog a quote that would grab me by the throat and forcibly ascend me to a higher plane where I understood myself and the universe better and with more kindness but also a little spook
“The past is gone, and cannot harm you anymore. And while the future is fast coming for you, it always flinches first and settles in as the gentle present” are you kidding me this quote has propelled me through at least three emotional crises
“The desert seems vast, even endless. And yet scientists tell us that somewhere, even now, there is snow.” That quote literally got me through grieving my brother like WTNV goes HARD
A List of Some of My Favorite Quotes From This Insane Podcast:
"You are beautiful when you do beautiful things."
"The present tense of regret is indecision."
"We understand so much, but the sky behind those lights-- mostly void, partially stars-- that sky reminds us we don't understand even more."
"Be proud of your place in the Cosmos. It is small and yet it is."
"Believe in yourself. You are an ancient, absent god, discussed only rarely by literary scholars. So if you don't believe, no one will."
"Death is only the end if you assume the story is about you."
“Whisper a dangerous secret to someone you care about. Now they have the power to destroy you, but they won’t. That’s what love is.”
"Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not. We never are. But that’s not the right question. The question is are we living a life that is worth the harm?"
"When we talk about teenagers, we adults often talk with an air of scorn, of expectation for disappointment. And this can make people who are presently teenagers feel very defensive. But what everyone should understand is that none of us are talking to the teenagers that exist now, but talking back to the teenager we ourselves once were – all stupid mistakes and lack of fear, and bodies that hadn’t yet begun to slump into a lasting nothing. Any teenager who exists now is incidental to the potent mix of nostalgia and shame with which we speak to our younger selves."
"We are not history yet. We are happening now. How miraculous is that?"
"Wednesday has been cancelled due to a scheduling error."
"We have nothing to fear except ourselves. We are unholy, awful people."
"A million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? A basilisk."
"There's nothing under your bed. There's nothing in your closet. Nothing waits in every darkness. Nothing is the most terrifying thing of all."
"The night sky is ten miles wide, eight miles deep, and floats three miles up. Its favourite food is grape jelly. It wants to be a drummer."
"Look to the sky. You will not find answers there, but you will certainly see what everyone is screaming about."
"Ignorance might not actually be bliss, but it is certainly less work."
"And now, a special report. Crocodiles: Can they eat your children? *YES.*"
"Lie down and look up at the ceiling and breathe with those curiously fragile lungs of yours and remind yourself: Don’t worry. Don’t worry. All is as it was meant to be. It was meant to be lonely and terrifying and unfair and fleeting. Don’t worry."
"As long as I’m reminding myself things, I’m a good person, worthy of love – both from myself and others."
"Guns don't kill people! It's impossible to be killed by a gun. We are all invincible to bullets and it's a miracle!"
"Everything is exciting! Particularly existence. Existence is the most thrilling fact of all."
"There is a monster under your bed. A monster at your window. A monster any place you imagine one. You project your monsters on the world."
"You miss 100% of the bank robberies you don't commit."
"I like my coffee like I like my nights. Dark, endless, and impossible to sleep through. "
"A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep. Welcome to Night Vale."
"And now, the weather."
I discovered this podcast at the beginning of high school, and let me tell you, it rewired my synapses.
Not only was it my first experience with positive LGBT representation, it was the show I clung to when everything else went to shit. Whatever was going on in my life, I knew I had this show in my corner, making me laugh, making me cry, making me feel okay about my place in the universe.
I owe the creators of this podcast more than I could express.
"the lights over the Arby's" is such an intrinsically queer piece of writing that it hits me *hard* every time.
"We will never be the same again. But here's a little secret for you: no one is ever the same thing again after anything. You are never the same twice, and much of your unhappiness comes from trying to pretend that you are. Accept that you are different each day, and do so joyfully, recognizing it for the gift it is. Work within the desires and goals of the person you are currently, until you aren't that person anymore, and everything changes once again." (from Episode 75)
"The universe is vast. You are also vast. So is an ant. There are different sizes of infinity."