“stay…
★
noise dept.

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Phantogram Three
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
YOU ARE THE REASON
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ojovivo

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$LAYYYTER

if i look back, i am lost
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@madamoisellemabry
“stay…
this is just for laughs and not to be taken seriously at all :)
here’s my ai-free quiz. it’s just for fun and not an actual reflection of your personality. happy shanebugging :)
feeling rly seen rn.
this is just for laughs and not to be taken seriously at all :)
here’s my ai-free quiz. it’s just for fun and not an actual reflection of your personality. happy shanebugging :)
shane getting high or drunk and not being able to get it up but begging ilya to use him anyway send tweet
Something I wish more heated rivalry fans were aware of is pre season games. More importantly, that Ottawa and Montreal play each other for the pre season. Which means the first Ottawa vs Montreal game after Shane signs with the centaurs is a game that will have zero consequences and will not affect their playoff chances in the long run at all. Ilya Rozanov is spending that entire fucking game in the sin bin
Personal assistant au. Shane hires Ilya as a personal assistant and somehow to Shanes confusion and also kinda Shane's delight, Ilya just kinda takes over Shane life.
Shane is never sure exactly how Ilya does it but within 3 months he is the one fully in charge of Shane's half of Shane's professional google calendar and all of Shane's personal calendar, he's charmed Yuna and has somehow turned into her Shane wrangling apprentice, and Shane finds himself having the most relaxing season because Ilya knows what Shane likes and chooses for him.
6 months in and somehow Ilya is living with Shane, sleeping in Shane's bed, and has already started soft-launching a permanent residency marriage.
Ilya being the gatekeeper of Shane's time, and sure he likes Shane happy and so he does deliberately keeps track and helps Shane find time for his friends and family but also he says no if he thinks Shane needs the rest or the quiet or if he just needs to focus on hockey right now.
At some point after they are married Yuna and Ilya disagree over something for Shane professionally. Ilya flexes his control and shows Yuna that Shane is always gonna choose him. Yuna still likes him but she thinks they should have been a little more wary of him. Its too late now and he seems to treat Shane very well but well, the thought is always there.
Inside Shane's head: orgasm ✅️, time for pillow talk, what is the most emotionally devastating question i can ask my casual situationship today?
in the gym thinking about hollanov getting to work out together (everyone act shocked)
#myilya is silent. the man knows how to keep his reactions so quiet, and i secretly think it’s the only place he’s really orderly and particular about. weights have to be racked and de-racked at the beginning and end of the workouts — nothing stays laid out. he’s got his noise cancelling headphones on, blasting brittany, and he’s standing there waiting for Megan to finish yelling the intro of Hiss before starting this next set.
#myshane, on the other hand, is a grunter. he’s a performer in the gym, it’s one of the only places where he is undeniably more masculine than his teammates by virtue of being #jacked. he’s throwing his weights down at the end of his set and he’s growling on that last leg press rep.
best is if ilya has no idea shane is so noisy until years in when he takes his headphones off to say something riiiiiight as shane throws down the kettlebell . and they fuck about it.
thinking ab shane hollander douching. shanenema.
Anya Forger + Reductress Headlines (?)
cottage hollanov with ilya who’s cock is so big it always looks a little hard if he doesn’t tuck it properly, wearing short/sweatpants with no underwear for the first time around shane who doesn’t know this. like he knows ilya’s cock is big, he just didn’t realise This was part of it. so whenever shane sees it he feels obligated to get ilya off bc he thinks it’s moral duty now that they’re in Love. he’s shocked when he pulls down ilya’s pants and his cock is soft, but shane’s already on his knees so he might as well suck it because it’s getting hard /now/. and it keeps happening bc shane somehow “forgets” this discovery every time. anyway this is another way for shane to invent free use
i wonder what shane and ilya r up to rn …
the first time ilya fucks shane raw and cums inside of him, shane starts crying when he tries to pull out noo no stop it’s coming out please don’t i— and ilya shushes him, pushes back in a with squelch of his cum pooling out around his cock, still half hard just from the feeling of his cum filling shane, and shane sobs, shaking and holding ilya tight, open mouthed kisses that are mostly ilya fucking his tongue against shanes thank u i love u fuck i love u so much
a centaurs appreciation post bc I love these characters and this team with all my heart 💗
ive never needed to fuck anyone more than this zane boodram
#myshane has a hockey tumblr account as a young boy and just before he meets ilya rozanov he becomes somewhat well known for how much he analyzes and posts ilya. so when he says to ilya ´you’re an awesome player to watch’ he really does mean he’s watched him for hours.
anyway, when ilya gets big in boston, he gains a small but passionate following of queer woman (maybe some of whom he’s slept with and been nice to) who find shane’s account and assume he’s a fellow groupie. he gets added to a groupchat on discord and once it becomes clear that he is (a) not a girl and (b) is very clearly hopeless at gossiping and is only funny on accident online the girls adopt him as their pet boy. when they’re not talking about how hot ilya is (which shane is way too terrified to engage with), or teasing him about how he’s always correcting them on ilya’s hockey (he is terrified and proud), he actually just gets along really well with these girls who don’t judge him for being awkward.
when ilya and shane get outed, the groupchat revives from the dead. it’s been a few years since they’ve sent more than the occasional meme, shane basically stopped responding in 2016 after one too many ´shane hollander can’t handle rose landry’ jokes, but the second hollanov is outed, all of the group clocks in.
the girls are FERAL. they are SO EXCITED. they have SO MUCH TO SAY. and those are the first messages that shane opens when he braves his phone. he’s crying before he can even type back.
anyway that’s how a group of queer girls (mostly lesbians) become the first people to meet hollanov as a couple over facetime.
I love the bathroom scene (bathroom scene my beloved) because yes ilya eventually handles the situation masterfully and regains the upper hand or whatever but you can tell how hard he’s winging it. second by second this man is flying by the seat of his pants. he’s not some suave sexy self-assured dom he’s like twenty-two and an idiot and he made shane cry which he genuinely didn’t know he had the power to do and now he’s scrambling to figure out what a suave sexy self-assured dom would do to fix it (while still seeming suave and sexy and self-assured of course). to me the beauty of ilya as a sexual and emotional being is that he is ALWAYS just making it up as he goes while simultaneously trying to project an aura of cool unflappable confidence. and he fools shane completely right up until tampa when shane is suddenly like ‘wait. hold on a minute. you have NO fucking clue what you’re doing do you’ and takes the reins.
prev tag from @jesterlesbian
College AU Russian studies major Shane Hollander forgets to tell the fuckbuddy he met through his speaking tutor Svetlana Vetrova that he is fluent in Russian and that he understands phrases like "you're so fucking perfect" and "you have ruined me" and "you look like a sexy librarian you perfect slut"
Ilya, whiny voice: come back to bed hollander i want to fuck you
Shane: can't i really need to finish this essay
Ilya: whats it on maybe i can help you
Shane, sweating staring at 2k words on modern russian pop culture: haha probably not no it's boring
op don't let these die in the tags