I should be sleeping but..

Hi, my name is Eve, 23, she/they

[xamag-draws]

them witches

[muffinshark]

🪽🐍 lost rembrandt portraits

[chefkids]

[precision-instrument]

I cannot emphasize this enough as a practical life skill: learn how to say no to authority figures. Learn how to tell them that nothing they can do to you will change your mind. Disappoint your parents. You have to live your own life.

[daughter-of-sapph0]

list of users gone because of scortched earth

partyjockers: for pointing out that there are hairy potty fans on staff and making the connection that it's the reason trans women keep getting flagged as mature

iamdealwithit: for pointing out that tumblr live literally steals your data and ip address and sells it to advertisers and the police back in December 29th of 2022, and was active up until seven hours ago today (September 5 2023) because that post started circulating again

both these people had the images from their post completely erased, their blogs completely wiped, and in partyjockers case the original post was wiped from the history of the site as well as any reblogs.

it's very strange that this has only happened twice to my knowledge and it only occurs when people point put staff's complete ineptitude and active malice towards it's userbase.

anyway screenshot this post just incase they start getting trigger happy. once is absolutely horrible censorship and should never fucking happen. twice sets a precedent that they will use this again.

[gangst3rswife]

Finally watched the Addams Family Values recently! and honestly. my main takeaway is

Debbie slays. And Joan Cusack is a QUEEN

[vbartilucci]

Joan Cusack has never appeared in a film that she did not steal.

And as for Debbie, I will always repost my stance on her end.

I’ve said it a million times - if Debbie had listened to what the Addamses were saying in response to her tales of woe, she’s have realized that they understood completely. She had found her people, and was too wrapped up in herself to realize it.

If they could have, they’d have burst from their bonds, hugged the stuffing out of her, bought her a Bentley (and a vintage Ballerina Barbie) and declare her an Addams.

She could spend the rest of her life trying to kill Fester, and he’d love her all the more every time she tried. And the rest would keep offering helpful suggestions. “No point in trying poison, Debbie my dear - he’s been putting strychnine on his cornflakes since was seven”.

[payasita]

they would have been such good friends

[dayasan]

He would not fucking say that but let's indulge

[jeaniefranklins]

#honestly some people really are out there writing characters OOC#but within the story the characterization is consistent and engaging#and you’re like…ah…sometimes a weed is just a plant out of place

[theburialofstrawberries]

I do. God help me I do

[guerrillatech]

[an-autistic-with-personhood]

[synebluetoo]

Why would you hide that in the notes

[thatdisasterauthor]

I want an ice maker and enough room in the freezer for a pizza and that is IT.

[libraford]

I want the dumbest fridge you got. Gimme the orange tabby of refrigeration. I want my fridge to pull the wrong lever and turn my enemies into llamas instead of killing them. I want the following features: keeps things cold, has compartment that keeps things colder, a door that opens and shuts.

[abronzeagegod]

"Here at Stupid Jeff's Dumb Appliance Warehouse we sell the dumbest fucking appliances. Check out this fridge. This fridge won't ask you about your day, this dumb fucking fridge doesn't know what an Elon Musk is and won't fucking tell you what bullshit that dumb monkey is slapping into his phone today when you try to get some fucking milk. We took out all those "smart" electronics and in their place we put a loaded Glock 9mm that is put right up to that light that turns on when you open the door, which is the smartest thing in this fucking stupid fridge and let me tell you that fucker is on thin goddamn ice, if it gets too smart and tries to turn on before you open that door, the Glock will blow it to hell. Speaking of ice, this stupid fridge makes it. It makes ice, it keeps things cold, it comes with shelves. It's sturdy enough that when your ex comes back to your place looking for their stuff that they think they left behind like nine months ago and they know that you don't have it, but they wanted an excuse to come start a fight with you and throw a chair at your head but miss you and hit your fridge MICHAEL, this fridge will keep trucking because it gives zero shits and it only lives to keep things cold. Come to Stupid Jeff's Dumb Appliance Warehouse, if you ask us if we have an app, we break your kneecaps."

[valtsv]

i love the specification of "alive" in the people magazine "sexiest man alive" award. clearly they're worried about ötzi the iceman sweeping the competition. as they should be.

[valtsv]

[weonsinnombre]

[steadfast-deactivated20210221]

This is the way you’re supposed to do pranks!

[darcyshire]

I try SO hard not to make faces when I hear someone around me say wild shit but I just can’t stop myself

[doodle-shenanigans]

Choose your fighter

[holic-user]

This is the funniest shit

Thank you so much for sharing

[transgenderization]

if you got like a 100kilo bag of glitter and opened it up and left it in the path of like a tornado i think that would be interesting. i dont care abt ecological damage btw

[dropbear42]

I do. 100kg bag of seaweed based glitter.

[thyrell]

i dont. 100kg bag of enriched uranium based glitter

[thyrell]

wait isnt uranium denser than lead how heavy would a 100kg bag of uranium be

[cursologist]

thyrell.

[thyrell]

just kill me

[thyrell]

[crazy-brazilian]

[what-even-is-thiss]

[valtsv]

there's something so compelling to me about the fact that sometimes leaving a blade or bullet inside the wound it made is the only way to prevent you from bleeding to death. something about the ironic symbolism of it. when the thing designed and intended to kill you is the only thing keeping you alive.

[valtsv]

also yes i do enjoy a bit of penetration imagery and the perverse intimacy of violence. if you must know.

[only-tiktoks]

[thedailybullshit]

[valtsv]

i like sailing myths and superstitions because most of them can be boiled down to "if the ocean doesn't like you it will chew you up and spit out your bones. and if it really loves you it will swallow you whole and keep you forever. good luck 👍"

[valtsv]

[cazkoss]

Stupid MS paint art