Maseratus

Don’t make me talk about myself

[quasi-normalcy]

"Good billionaires" are a myth invented by Big Billionaire to sell fewer guillotines

[valtsv]

"here's my original character, Man Who Sucks But Loves His Daughter Very Much" and it's a guy who worships at the altar of patriarchal violence and the woman he uses as an excuse and an effigy to absolve him

[sea-parrot]

You wake up one morning, and feel something is off. Your pillow smells strangely sweet. You’re still groggy with sleep, and try to hug your pillow closer. A piece of it simply breaks in your hand. It is made of chocolate.

You try to pull the blanket off of yourself, and you realize that, it too, is made of chocolate. You try to shake it off, and step out of bed. Your carpet feels strangely spongy. You look down, only to realize it’s actually cake. Lovingly baked, and smelling of sweet fruit. You grab a piece, and cautiously take a bite. It is one of the most delicious cakes you have ever eaten.

You get up, confused, and exit your room to see if the rest of your house is like this. The door handle melts in your hand as you hold onto it, and covers it with dark chocolate carefully painted gold. The rest of the carpet on the floor is still cake, the guardrails on the stairs leading down are tempered chocolate, the tiles on the floor are the same, the windows are sugar glass, everything is edible.

You run outside, knocking over the lovingly crafted chocolate front door in a panic.

You realize, in horror, that your house was not an exception. The bushes, the grass, the asphalt on the road, the trees, birds, the world itself, is chocolate.

Somewhere, not too far away, stands a man. Amaury fucking Guichon.

[sea-parrot]

I'm gonna stop you right there

[behindnightmaresanddreams]

You ain't stopping shit.

[yamada-ryo]

it implies a "postcum"

[trans-ralsei]

the postcum movement encompasses a variety of artistic, cultural and philosophical movements. it emerged in the mid 20th century as a skeptical response to cum,

[minor-locrian]

a warthog is a thog specialized for use in war

[monstrous-divinity]

michelle's soft estrogenized lemonade

[doggiewoggiez]

Shit man, this soldier war is fucked. I just saw a guy kill another guy, with a gun. I gotta get the fuck outta here.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

I've just seen a TV show review describe teen pregnancy as an "adult theme" and I'm sorry but what are we even doing. how is that. how is that a. like it says in the name of the thing that it's

[sodomit]

Parents: "children should be taught that actions have consequences"

Okay, let them stay up till 5 in the morning and feel like shit for the next day, eat a bag of candy in one go and have a huge stomach ache, go out without an umbrella and catch a cold, watch a violent movie and get scared?

Parents: "actually, we mean screaming and beating the crap out of them when they try to do these things"

[whumpster-fire]

"Okay, let them stay up till 5 in the morning and feel like shit for the next day,"

It's funny you mention this one because I think I remember one on Reddit where the parent caught the kid watching a movie past their bedtime or something, and proceeded to force the kid to stay up literally all night watching movies with the parent and then go to school on zero sleep.

Many parents just take the idea of "Natural Consequences" to mean "Be creative and think of sadistic ways of punishing your children that are sufficiently connected to what they did to give you plausible deniability."

[starsandsupernovae]

"there's no platonic explanation for this" some of y'all need better friends

[starsandsupernovae]

"there's no platonic explanation for this" some of y'all need to be better friends

[maseratus]

Starting to think the girls in this show do in fact play fighting games

[tajrishgp]

assume everybody in your replies and reblogs is experiencing a gas leak in their home

[maseratus]

@demilypyro

[cyberpunkpavlichenko]

The moral of Death Note is that cops raise evil children

[parkchanwoohoo]

[amnesiaguy]

so ummm welcome to my jar:) lemme show you around! theres some holes poked in the top so i can breathe, theres some leaves to munch on, and ive even got a twig! #mytwig

[amnesiaguy]

weird as hell, thank you for asking

[hagiomoto]

Don't ask that tourist friendly pedestrian friendly modern country how they feel about refugees

[spreadsopotism]

Don't ask the expat friendly foreign investment friendly modern country how they feel about labour migrants.

[vamptits]

filtering down ao3 results from 14000 to 6 based on a single tag is foul. im sorry none of you are as enlightened as me ig.

[vamptits]

normal one. next question.

[mothgirl-is-a-gateway-drug-deac]

peer review