Hi there! I'm McKenzie, a sixteen year-old Level 1 autistic. I am a student, writer, artist, and enjoyer of a lot of music!
This blog is devoted to girls like me: teenaged (or even older) girls who are tired of constantly battling themselves. I was diagnosed with autism at age fourteen, after years of bullying and wondering why I just didn't seem to fit in with my peers. I hope to share some tips and tricks to make the journey to self-acceptance easier and less exhausting for everyone!
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SOME DISCLAIMERS:
⧠These tips won't help everyone; in fact, some things that work for some may have the potential to be detrimental to others! Please try to know what works for you, and pay attention to your mental health!
⧠I am not saying that showing autistic traits is bad, or that everyone should mask. This is a blog for people like me, who cannot unmask or even just don't want to. (Also-- I do not support Autism Speaks, or any organizations that seek to minimize and hurt autistic people.)
⧠This blog is pro-love and anti-hate! If you are racist, antisemitic, homophobic/transphobic, islamophobic, ableist, etc., then this isn't the space for you. I respect most opinions, but ones that actively cause harm (or support harm) to others are not welcome here. I am pro-Palestine, LGBTQ+ friendly, and welcoming to all types of people.
⧠I am a minor, so I will not interact with any 18+ material. If you post such things, it's a-ok to interact with me and I'll gladly interact with your sfw things, but you won't see any nsfw material on this blog!
ABOUT ME:
⧠I use she/her pronouns.
⧠Some interests of mine include: classic literature (or any books, really), writing, medicine, history, linguistics, and more!
⧠I wish to become a forensic pathologist one day.
⧠I'm a twin; I have a twin sister, who's my best friend for life!
⧠I will always be anti-ai!
That's all for right now! Feel free to interact and send me messages or asks; I want to better know my community and perhaps make some friends!
PARENT: I got "rubber duck" for my child's "bath" and she loves it.
AUTISM RESPONSE: Rubber ducks and other rubber bath toys can accumulate mold on the inside because of small holes underneath where moisture becomes trapped. The mold often goes unnoticed because it's not visible from the outside.
CORRECT RESPONSE(?): That's nice, I am unaware of how mold could impact this situation.
When you think someone's laughing at you, look around. Is there anything funny happening? Are they just joking with someone else? Think of how many times you've simply thought of something funny and had to laugh at it.
(Even if they are, it passes! People forget and move on so quickly it's stupid, but also really helpful if you're like me and suffer from constant embarrassment.)
Don't use TV shows as a guide for facial expressions/speech patterns! A lot of things that characters do are exaggerated for entertainment, especially in cartoons or action-packed programs. Discreetly observe your peers' lingo, faces, reactions to certain topics of conversation, etc., for a better representation of how you 'should' be acting around them.
(Note that you don't have to act like your peers! Often, an original personality is better than any 'normal' one.)
People can be real jerks when it comes to an autistic person stimming, that's no doubt. I've compiled a list of some very low-key stims that I use every day, that I've never gotten comments on! These might not be the best for situations in which you want to verbally stim, but for random moments of the day they're nice.
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Counting Things:
This one's a classic. Count wall tiles, floorboards, ceiling tiles, lines and dots on fabric, colors in a poster; anything that can be counted! I like to count individual threads in my sweaters, and words in a book if I have one in front of me. It's really time-consuming, and is great for when you're bored or just waiting around in a quiet space (like after/during a test, in a library, etc.)
Wiggling Fingers/Toes:
The one I use most, and the one I've never gotten comments about. I do it all the time without realizing. Wiggling/flapping your hands is a bit more conspicuous, but as long as you're wearing shoes literally no one can tell that you're moving them unless you move your whole foot. I end up doing this when listening to music a lot, or when I'm restless but am supposed to be sitting still. It's really good for times when you need to be focused, and can't do any stimming that required mental activity.
Fiddling with a Pencil or Pen:
As long as you don't drop it, people usually don't really mind this one. It's visible, but a comment fidget even for neurotypicals. Twist a pencil in your hand, pass it back and forth, study the grains of graphite it leaves on paper, anything! With pens you've got to be more careful, as clicking it is ANNOYING to most, but watching the ink dry (especially on lower-quality pens that take forever to dry) is always fun. Just be careful not to accidentally launch it across the room and hit someone, like I do sometimes.
Repeated Words and Phrases
I know, I know, echolalia and vocal stimming is pretty conspicuous, but I'm not talking about saying anything. Repeat words and phrases in your head-- set them to a beat, make rhymes, think of new words that don't exist. This one's great for boredom, as long as you're not supposed to be focusing on something else in the moment. I'm learning two languages at the moment, and I often take this opportunity to run through all of the vocabulary I know!
Braiding Hair:
This one's the GOAT. Again, very visible, but also very common. Just be careful if you're talking to someone, so they don't think you're flirting. (I don't really know why that's seen as flirtatious, but I guess it is somehow?)
Air Bubbles:
This one's a bit hard to explain, but I've discovered that if you keep a bit of air in your mouth (not enough to puff your cheeks or anything, just a small bit on your tongue), you can use your tongue to split it up, move it, et cetera. It's a bit weird, and you have to be sure that your mouth isn't visibly moving and that you're not making weird mouth noises, but I find myself doing this mindlessly all the time.
Gum/Mints:
Super duper normal, and effective! Mint can be great if you want to stim by something with sensory input, and flavors are nice for the senses as well. Just be sure that you're not smacking or making mouth noises (all of my fellow folks with misophonia understand that pain well) and you'll be a-ok!
Warming Up Your Hands:
This one's also a bit odd. Wrap your hand around each finger of your other hand for a while, until the finger warms up, and then place it on a cold table or other surface. Just be sure you aren't being weird with it and no one notices, lol. This is especially nice if it's cold where you are; I like warming up my hands and then putting them directly onto cold metal, like a can or chair leg.
Fingernails:
Run your fingertips over your fingernails! Be careful not to pick at your nails or skin, though, as that's not very fun when it begins to bleed and can be bad for your skin. It sort of tickles, haha, and you can do this to your palms as well.
Feel Your Pulse:
Either set your hand on your wrist or pretend you're resting your head on your chin, and feel your pulse with your fingers.
That's all for now! Let me know if there's any other tips/tricks you'd like to hear!
When trying to choose how to dress, simple is best! You don't need to wear trendy clothes to seem basic in them, and you don't have to sacrifice your comfort. Any articles of clothing can work together if you want them to, and a simple large t-shirt with leggings can be both cute and sensory-friendly!
(Personally, I prefer a large hoodie/t-shirt with a pair of flared leggings. Tying the shirt makes the bagginess look cute, and the size and softness of the shirt makes it so I don't get overstimulated by my clothing. The key is finding what works for you!)
I know I've mentioned this before, but if your crush is autistic (or suspected), you ABSOLUTELY MUST tell them you have a crush on them. And if your way of telling them is inviting them somewhere as a date, you ABSOLUTELY MUST tell them it's supposed to be a date.
The only reason I am married to my wife now is that in 2018 she straight up told me she had a crush on me and wanted to be my girlfriend.
people who don't experience hyperfixation don't know what it feels like to hyperfixate so much on something that it becomes not only your subject of obsession but also your source of happiness and literally the main reason why you still keep going; literal source of strength and life.
shoutout to my favorite fictional characters, favorite people, favorite ships, favorite movies, favorite tv shows, fanfics and archive of our own
I think some of you forgot that autistic people sometimes act strange and say things that are poorly worded and speak with incorrect tone and misunderstand or miss social cues because they are autistic
In hindsight being a âgifted kidâ is so funny. You have substantial difficulties with socializing and fine motor skills, but weâre going to ignore that because youâre really good at reading chapter books
Autism actually can make people violent and aggressive, and Iâm tired of âautism advocatesâ saying it canât. Many autistic people, especially higher support needs people lose control of their bodies during meltdowns and times of high emotion. Some autistics have limited control of their bodies at all times. This body brain disconnect is a prevalent associative feature of autism. This is not to say that measures shouldnât be taken to protect and teach the autistic person and others, but you canât erase real, but stigmatized parts of a condition, and then dare to call yourself an advocate. Just because a symptom is unpleasant or unpalatable doesnât mean itâs not a genuine part of the disorder. Stop âcleansingâ your autism advocacy.
When you're getting overwhelmed, a good way to escape a situation without making a fuss or gathering judgement is to claim you have a migraine or headache. People seem to be more sympathetic to those causes, and it allows you to escape sensory-overloading situations with a valid excuse!
