Gonna pick up the pieces and build a Lego house

Mason Crawford. Twenty-three years old toy designer for Mattel. I play with toys and I don't care if you think I am too old for that. Fuck your opinion. Part asshole, part sarcastic, with a pain in the ass best friend, a oscar winning sidekick and a supermodel smartass in my life. disclaimer

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

You don’t have to be just one thing. I just like giving people nicknames. Makes it easier for me to remember them, you know?

I think more people should actually learn that from you… And backfiring because of what I said, others trying to tell me what to do is generally a conversation that leaves both parties frustrated. I don’t like frustration.

[mason-crawford]

You could remember my name, but I guess the drugs don’t help on that end.

I am a firm believer that you should only get frustrated about yourself. I mean, other people you can’t change, so why bother? Just mind your business.

[mason-crawford]

#i don't even want to know what's going on in this photo

[todd-phillips-blog]

I don’t, you do. You were the one who was scared to come out, remember? You pretty much cared about what anyone said or thought about you. 

It was pretty fucking obvious, dumbass. We spend most of our time together, I basically live at your apartment. If that doesn’t scream relationship and dating then I don’t know what does.

[mason-crawford]

Actually, I didn’t want to admit that I was gay. Pretty different. And it was because I was brainwashed by my religious family, alright! The rest is more like screw it. Besides, I am still a little embarrassed ‘bout you. You are like a fucking train wreck. Why do I even like you anyways?

Sorry, I didn’t have a gay manual saying that just because two guys bang and sleep together most of the time they are dating. According to the gay shows, that is like a weekend in Pittsburgh. I think saying this is my boyfriend helps.

[mason-crawford]

#i don't even want to know what's going on in this photo

[todd-phillips-blog]

God may be forgiving but the majority of the people who pray to him aren’t. I threw the blonde stereotype at you and you’re throwing the models are dumb one back at me, smart move.

Last time I checked we were. We’ve been together for quite a long time, at this point you’re pretty much stuck with me.

[mason-crawford]

And since when do I care about people? Or you care about people for that matter? I thought the main charm of both of us was that we are huge assholes and we give shit to people. And no, not the models are dumb at you, smartass, just Todd is dumb.

Oh, really? That’s good to know. I didn’t have that information. You could give me that info before, you know? Like ‘hey, asshole, we are dating’.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

I wouldn’t mind sounding ten. Coming to think about it, those were times I didn’t really have to worry about much. But, if you’re not awesome, who might you be?

That sounds like a nice life plan. Stay away from people’s business. I wish it were easier said than done. You seem like an interesting man, but, I suppose I’m not gonna be around you much or some of those plans of yours might start backfiring, and you would not want something like that, would you?

[mason-crawford]

── That’s kinda depressing. I didn’t say I am not awesome, but do I have to be one thing? Besides being myself, of course.

It is easy to be done. You just don’t poke around where you don’t need and stay on your shit. So simple. Backfiring? Why?

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Roxy. And, I like Awesome for a nickname, it’s so fucking great!

That makes things between us a lot more likely to work out. Believe me when I say it’s a lecture that only goes around in circles and leaves both parties frustrated at the end.

[mason-crawford]

Sounds like we are ten.

Nah── I am the kind of guy that takes care of my business and casually insults you, whether you have good or bad life choices. But the main deal is, I take care of my business and you of yours, as long as it doesn’t spill shit on me, then, if it does, I just cut ties. Less headaches and less savior complex.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Awesome really does enjoy his remarks, right?

I agree with the fact that it depends. Right now, I’m just going with the tide. I’m still young and sometimes in life you have to go on and make your own mistakes in order to actually learn something. I’m still in that process. Making mistakes and such. It’s just about living the moment and I’m pretty sure that if it was something I didn’t enjoy, I wouldn’t go into another round.

[mason-crawford]

It is getting really stupid to refer to me as Awesome, even though I am. Name’s Mason.

Make your own mistakes and go with the tides seems two completely different things for me, but I am not here to lecture you. I have no patience for it.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

You clearly don’t know me all that well… Parents hate me. I can really do a number with their heads and like I said, once I’m done, they’ll be glad if I’m just out of their child’s life forever and will settle for whatever else one may have in mind. I’m that good. Or that bad, it all depends on how you see it.

Maybe that is the point. To pass out to a point nothing matters anymore and whatever happens, happens. It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey, and getting there is the good part.

[mason-crawford]

Of course I don’t know you at all, I’ve just met you.

It really depends on what you want out of life. Do you want to scare everyone’s parents, so kuddos! You got it right, but if you don’t, you might think about changing a bit. But what is the point of the journey if you won’t remember it? Drunk amnesia happens a lot.

[mason-crawford]

#i don't even want to know what's going on in this photo

[todd-phillips-blog]

Child of God? Really? You are aware that you’re currently in a relationship with another man, right? I mean, I know you’re blonde and all–so that little fact may or may not have crossed your mind.

[mason-crawford]

So? It says in the bible that God is forgiving. Please, tell me more about the blonde stereotype while I confuse you with big words.

But we are in a relationship now, aren’t we? Thought we were still in the vacuum of not knowing.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Just so I know… Does Awesome only like the same sex? I need to know whether I should flirt with you or just be… I don’t know, friendly, I guess. You should take me to meet them. By the time I’m done, they’ll just be glad if you decide to date anyone else.

I go to clubs, I drink myself to oblivion sometimes and some other little things whenever I’m in the mood for.

[mason-crawford]

That’s a good question. I would reply if I had a good answer, but until last year I didn’t even know I liked the same sex, but I’m going out with this jackass guy, so you see, I think you would be safer with being friendly, not that I am good at being friendly. And I am sure they would like you either way, I mean, you get points just by being a woman, though I had this girl that would be the perfect beard, but it was not something I wanted to do.

Drink to oblivion... I always though that was such a dumb move. I mean, nothing wrong with drinking, but there is no point to go into oblivion, I mean, you won’t have fun and if you do, you won’t remember, so what is the point?

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Go out where? Maybe Awesome would like to turn his life into something more complicated?

Whenever you need trouble, I’m your girl.

[mason-crawford]

Sports bar, nightclubs, and Awesome has his life very complicated already. Finding out you like the same sex then telling his religious family is quite the trouble.

What about you? What is your kind of fund, troublemaker?

[mason-crawford]

#i don't even want to know what's going on in this photo

[todd-phillips-blog]

… It was hard to read all of what you said with a straight face. If anything, you’re the one who is so full of shit that you’re believing most of the lies you just spat out.

[mason-crawford]

I never lie. I am a child of God, please, I am pure and saint, not to mention adorable and awesome. I think you just got myself confused with yourself. That is what I get for spending too much time with you.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Sheer curiosity. So, you’re pretty awesome, that’s kind of interesting. What does awesome do for fun?

My kind of answer! There’s never too much information!

[mason-crawford]

Awesome likes to go out, have beers, watch games, whichever. I am actually pretty simple.

Please, so you are in for a ride.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

So, are you? The last cookie, I mean? Social conventions are generally only good to make sure people will remain nice little lambs and not turn into the big bad wolf. Should I take it you’re not whipped?

[mason-crawford]

Why is it matter? It is all a matter of perspective, but I think I am pretty awesome.

I am not whipped, unless it means an actual whip... Ops too much?

[mason-crawford]

#i don't even want to know what's going on in this photo

[todd-phillips-blog]

‘Cause everything is your fault? Even if I do something wrong, it still somehow relates back to you. You’re basically ruining my life at this point.

[mason-crawford]

── You are so full of shit. I saved you, little bitch. Not to mention that I gave your life meaning, purpose, and I made it so much better, so stop spreading lies! Just because you are too busy focusing on my stunning appearance, it is not my fault you are stupid.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Well, well, well, you might actually have a point there… It is, really, one of society’s stigmas that you can’t think of yourself as the last cookie of the package… Points for you.

[mason-crawford]

I am. It is another one of my many gifts. And I don’t care for what society thinks. They are only important as you make them be.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Easy. Most people won’t go about how nice their faces look in a picture. They’ll thank for something and just let it go.

[mason-crawford]

That is such a bullshit explanation. It is the mirror of the society that you are only a cool person if you are humble about yourself. It is ridiculous.

[roxy-gcamille-deactivated201604]

Smart answer. It’s really none of my business, just an educated guess.

[mason-crawford]

Educated? Please, tell me how you got yourself educated about my life and ego based on one single sentence.