boo!

[taliasshaw]

I have considered that but I thought the best course of action would be to give you a hard time anyway. I dunno! You said yourself you were kind of a slut in your twenties. You could have a son.

[danielabrams]

[...] Now why would you feel the need to say that in public?

[maybemonica]

[user tries to find correlation between daniel being a slut and minions. she knows that brad is not biologically his, but as a blob who simply manifested in the woods one day, she does not care.]

Miss Talia Shaw, don't be mad at mister!! If you're the one that he's chosen as his partner, then Brad will be happy to accept you as his mother!!

[danielabrams]

Some creature person guy person calling me daddy does not literally make me their father.

[maybemonica]

Yes it DOES because you accepted him into your heart!!! You accepted him as your son!!! You wouldn't have escaped and be typing this to me in the human world otherwise?!?!?

[danielabrams]

Can't be a deadbeat dad because I ain't a dad. I got no son or any other kids. That thing was yellow

[maybemonica]

You quite LITERALLY are one because Brad called you daddy, have you already forgotten??? He called you daddy and you shared an embrace???? And my tummy isn't even hurting when I type this which means it's literally TRUE mister

[taliasshaw]

[User has not and will not look at the other drawing, otherwise she might have seen that this is not a human child which may have prevented this whole situation. How sad.] Oh, Brad. Right. His son.

Well, the man I know is @danielabrams. Anything to own up to, honey?

[danielabrams]

I ain't got a son, honey. And if I did, he wouldn't be named Brad

[maybemonica]

[user checks the profile. she is delighted to see that it is indeed the minion king. less delighted by his attitude.] YOU'RE LYING why are you lying!!!! Brad looks just like you and he LOVES you :( WHY ARE YOU BEING A DEADBEAT DAD RN?!?!?!

[hollow--sun]

It's giving :

But also that sounds like Emilio. Why does it sound lik

[maybemonica]

Hiiiii Henri! :D

You are so right!! Maybe if you can help me find him, we could make him the new Fruit of the Loom spokesperson.

[theo-wallace]

I have so many questions Does he have a name? Or will he react to being called the minion king?

[maybemonica]

Well some of my sources are telling me that his name is Daniel, so that really narrows it down. He should definitely react to being called the minion king!! Even if it's just him scowling until a vein pops out of his forehead or smth

[diana-triformis]

All of it

A king... of the little yellow cartoon people? That are not real?

Why is he dressed like Carmen Miranda? Why is it a stick figure? What is going on, are you okay, do you need help, why is this weirder than almost everything else I have ever dealt with in this fucking town WHY IS HE DRESSED IN THE FRUIT HAT AND WHY IS HE THE KING OF A CARTOON POPULATION

[maybemonica]

THEY ARE REAL! I SAW THEM! Who's to say that they're not real?? And even if they weren't, can't people be the king of anything they put their minds to?? Sara Bareilles even wrote a song about it and everything!!

[infinityandmadness]

No wait, no that wasn't a riddle! I was joking, because you said he was grumpy 24/7 lol It's more of a later evening hike, but sometimes it can stretch into nightime. I am easily distracted by curiosities!

[maybemonica]

Oh!!!!! Duh!!!!!! I forgot that was a silly thing that humans say lol brain fart!! He did seem like someone who would create an extra hour of the day and day of the week just so he could be grumpy...

I am too!! That's such a good way of putting it...next time someone says "Monica, focus!!" I'm just gonna say that I'm distracted by the curiosities of the world.

[taliasshaw]

[User thinks this might be Daniel. User remembers that Daniel came home from the grocery store with just a bunch of random fruit and is more certain.] I may know this man. What's this about his son, though?

[maybemonica]

Oh, good!!!! I reaaallly hope you do because Brad misses him!! Brad is his son, Brad misses his daddy (the man in the picture) so I want to reunite them. Anything info you have on this man would totally help!!!

[User didn't expect her search for the minion king to gain so much traction. She assumes that people are following along on her profile, so she doesn't bother linking the drawing she did of Brad, which clearly depicts him as a minion.]

[castillo-protocol]

Right? It's such a fun little game. I can't play it for too long, though. My shoulders get too tense. But, yeah we have one of our own. It's rolling around Downtown!

Although, I do suppose a real life katamari is kinda horrifying if I sit down and think about. Less fun music and more screaming... oh wait the people scream in the game too...

[maybemonica]

WHAT that's craaaaazzzzyyyy I gotta see if anyone's got footage of it or something....or maybe just go find it for myself....

....but from a distance....since you bring up those points. That's so distressing to hear that the people scream in the game D: Much less whimsical!

[infinityandmadness]

Yeah, in the woods, where I met him on my usual hike at night. He's definitely nice on the 8th day, at the 25th hour, I've seen it with my own eyes. Oh, well! It's no problem at all, Monica. Well, that would be nice of them.

[maybemonica]

Uhhhh ok I'm def not smart enough to figure out whatever riddle you just said but I believe you! A night hike sounds crazy fun!! As long as there's no creepy things lurking in the dark...

[infinityandmadness]

Oh. Yeah! His name is Daniel, I think? He seemed in a rush to have me leave the woods, so I couldn't say I learned anything other than that. Really nice guy, though. He was out pretty late to be having a son and ruling over his minion kingdom...

[maybemonica]

Daniel....in the woods....taking notes.....taking notes.....

I could see him being nice! Even if he did threaten my friends and his son with a knife. His royal/fatherly duties are a newer development tho so that's probs why! You have been a HUUUUUUGE help, Bellamy!!! I think the minions would def deem you pure of heart.

[diana-triformis]

[...]

[...]

[...]

Hi, so, what?

[maybemonica]

I'm looking for a missing person!! He is the minion king and a father. What's not to get??

[infinityandmadness]

Hm. Yeah! Now it's starting to look way more familiar to me. I think he gave me water once.

[maybemonica]

Really?!?! That's so nice and generous of him...I knew he had it in him deep in his heart!! Do you have his name 👁️👁️

[infinityandmadness]

It's coming together a little now. Yeah! Yeah. Could you, maybe, give him a torch?

[maybemonica]

Uhh okay?? A torch is sooo medieval times I kinda like it! Also I do not condone fire so close to a child's head but I'm starting to run out of room!

[inesfromwc]

[...] Who's his son?

[maybemonica]

Brad! [user links her drawing for Bellamy] Look at Brad's mustache, isn't he the spitting image of his father??

[infinityandmadness]

Oh! I might know a couple of guys like that. Maaaybe not quite as grumpy looking. Do you have an example of them, maybe, being happier?

[maybemonica]

Here he is with his son, which I imagine made him happy! Or at least, not as grumpy. You can tell he's not as grumpy because he's not furrowing his brow + he's patting his son's head.