MeriaGLOCK

Merry Brandybuck (but with a gun)

[valtsv]

my hot take

[valtsv]

[valtsv]

[256gb]

oh, boo hoo, let me blow you a sick smoke ring on the worlds smallest vape

[penny-anna]

Gandalf: man is a featherless biped.

Merry, bursting into the room, brandishing a naked Pippin: BEHOLD, A MAN!

[penny-anna]

positive fellowship alignment chart (from here)

[penny-anna]

and for some reason sam being on the sexy tab is the funniest thing in the worldas funny as it is i might’ve placed him on the genuine tab

in my lesbian (ie, in this context pointless) opinion Sam is objectively the sexiest member of the fellowship

[anx1ous-op0ssum]

As a bi/pansexual I feel slightly more qualified to weigh in on this.

Sam is sexy af, but not in an traditional way.

Sam is the guy who will take care of you. He’ll bring you breakfast in bed made from vegetables from his garden and eggs from his chickens. He’ll build a fire in the evening and rub your feet.

Sam is Farmers Market sexy.

[penny-anna]

Boromir: *lying awake one night* Hey Merry. you awake.

Merry: ?I am now

Boromir: what are baby hobbits called

Merry: …hobbit… babies?

Boromir: yes those, what do you call them?

Merry: hobbit babies.

Boromir: yes but what are they CALLED.

Merry: hobbit. babies.

Boromir: but what are they called?

Merry: I give up *goes back to sleep*

Boromir: *staring up at the sky* I still don’t know what they’re called

[penny-anna]

~next morning~

Merry: hey Boromir

Boromir: hm?

Merry: last night. did you wake me up. to ask me what hobbit babies are called.

Merry: or did I dream that

Boromir: ………………….you never answered the question

Merry: yes I did

Boromir: no you didn’t

Merry: Frodo. Sam. Anyone. please help.

Sam: Mr Merry what the fresh hell are you talking about

Merry: Sam tell Boromir what we call baby hobbits

Sam: ……you mean… babies?

Merry: exactly

Boromir: ………….OH

Boromir: I thought. there might be a special word.

Sam: no we just call them babies why would there be a special word

Merry: what would it even… be

Boromir: I don’t know that’s why I was ASKING

Legolas, from the other side of the hill: BOBBITS

[penny-anna]

Pippin: BOBBITS

Merry: no

Pippin: I’m making it happen

Merry: nO

Pippin: bobbits. little bobbits. back when i was a bobbit. I love it.

Sam: *not looking up from what he’s doing* Mr Pippin if you ever say that word around me again I am going to rip your guts out through your nose

Pippin: ……………wow.

*Merry losing his shit in the foreground*

*Aragorn losing his fucking mind in the background*

[aragvrns-deactivated20200612]

Those without glocks can still die upon them

[boromir-with-a-gun]

fucking superb you funky little hobbits

[wetmeatchaperone]

@frodo-bagguns I drew Frodo with really pointy feet

[frodo-bagguns]

ah yes. I will kick people with them. additionally weaponry. thank you so much <3

[penny-anna]

Merry: How old do you think I am?

Eowyn: Merry, age doesn't matter. You can die at any time.

[penny-anna]

Gandalf: my son now

Pippin: Gandalf how many times do I have to tell you, I already have a father

Gandalf: so?

Merry: I’m on the market for a new dad actually

Gandalf: fuck off Merry

[penny-anna]

Frodo: oh, Merry! Life would be so much simpler, if we were newts

Merry: ………….Yes, well, I’ve said the same thing myself a hundred times.

(original)

[valtsv]

i know that gun crime is a very serious issue and i am absolutely pro-gun control but at the same time “(x) but with a Gun” memes will literally never not be fucking hilarious

[valtsv]

post on this site: the lord of the rings but legolas has a shotgun

my shit idiot gremlin brain:

[valtsv]

i am on the FLOOR

[penny-anna]

the most terrifying sentence in the universe

[penny-anna]

nice

[wheeloffortune-design]

Aragorn is saying “potato” and “wait that’s my horse”

[gollgun]

@legunlas @gunli

[legunlas]

This is accurate to how gunli and I sleep

[gunli]

It;s true! He’s a cuddly fellow

[samgungee]

hobbits with guns reblog if you agree

[lesbianrey]

hi i’m tolkien here are my ocs. i call them Elves (not elfs!!! if you call them elfs i will block you) they look like humans but they’re tall, live forever, and have pointy ears. that’s it bye

[meattunic-deactivated20171126]

cs lewis: are you alright with constructive criticism? i dont want to sound mean

tolkien: no go ahead i want to hear it

cs lewis: they fucking suck

tolkien: thats not constructive criticism

[lazytechsupport]

cs lewis: here’s my OC, it’s jesus but he’s a lion tolkien: Furry cs lewis: blocked

[blue-paladin-red-lion-deactivat]

Tolkien: lamp posts don’t exist in fantasy worlds Cs Lewis: ok you know what fuck you

[4setsofcorsets]

CS Lewis: I could beta for you if you want. help you trim the fat on your stories

Tolkien: what do you mean

CS Lewis: I just. you describe a lot of trees.  are trees that important

Tolkien: just you fucking wait. trees are SO important.

~and that day, Tolkien invented ents~

[arwengundomiel]

@saurgun fuck you

[saurgun-blog]

I see you

[arwengundomiel]

oh well if you’re already looking over here

[arwengundomiel]