queer as in fuck you

30s. she/her. *If you follow me and need me to tag for something, let me know.*

[dragon-in-a-fez]

one of the funniest conversations I ever had with my ex was when they were still getting used to Celsius and asked me "what's 20 degrees?" and instead of converting it, I said "it's the highest your dad will ever let you set the thermostat and when you say you're cold he tells you to put on another sweater, we're not made of money" and they went "oh, 68"

the fact that this reference was that fucking precise was something they went on to tell people about for years.

[shadowen]

I'm scrolling Tumblr. I pause to watch a video of Amaury Guichon. He pours chocolate into a mold, then carefully removes the shape of a human head. There are time lapse clips of chocolate being formed into a body, limbs, and hair. As the final detail is finished, he steps back to reveal the figure of a beautiful woman, uncannily lifelike. He steps forward and places a delicate kiss on her lips. The figure, now a living human woman, stirs and looks around in wonder. Amaury Guichon looks into the camera with a wide smile and holds out his arms in presentation.

"Fucking chocolate guy," I mutter to myself before scrolling to the next post.

[youthincare]

people should be allowed to have low ambition, and also be able to feed a family on the salary of a cashier at a convenience store.

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

[thebelchers]

Bob’s Burgers, Easy Com-mercial, Easy Go-mercial (S04E11)

[npdclaraoswald]

A doll youtuber I watch has made a video about the history of Polly Pocket, and she's describing the plots of the dvd specials, one of which features an elderly woman named Ms. Throckmorton, and my reaction was

[end0parasite]

emoji kitchen is lowkey beautiful guys…

[dragon-in-a-fez]

am I doing this right

[wolfderolfe]

i had a vision last night that absolutely ruined me. a bra, but it’s overalls. denim with the straps you have to tie and everything. but it’s a bra!

[wolfderolfe]

overbralls

[everythingisstardust]

I’m horrified that she’s actually considering it

[mctreeleth]

I mean, of course I would be considering it, having dumb sewing ideas is basically 90% of my personality.

…oh wait no I went one further than considering it I did do it…

I ended up not going with the front fly closure, in part because the shortest opened ended metal zipper I could get was 40cm long and also TWELVE DOLLARS(!) but also because I got annoyed with trying to work out the equivalent of a waistband for the bust curve - this one has a button closure at the centre back but I think next time I would go to the effort of sewing a proper bra hook-and-eye closure because it is a bit hard to wrangle on and off.

(If you want one of your own, the pattern for mine was once McCalls M7937 before I re-did it to my personal preferences and to be a bikini top rather than an outerwear top, but view B is pretty much this except slightly longer and with straps that are, you know, not overalls.)

[definitlynotafiredemon]

Jra for your joobies

[yaoiblackmold]

Top 3 things people love insisting they don't have despite it being impossible

Pronouns

An accent

Bias

[depsidase]

[bannertanks]

[strongermonster]

i'm helping out at a creative writing workshop for uhhh i think 10-12s? 10-14s? idk. but that age range. and anyways

a) i forgot how fun this is

b) it's really hard not to like, re-write for them and stick to just "hey add descriptions here, change this grammar, really cool ideas!" bc i'm an adult and not trying to talk over/railroad these kids, but i'm just so excited for their ideas!!!

c) little boys write cool stuff like "what if we went to mars but it sucked so we left, but left behind all our technology and the technology rose up and created its own society and then went to war with us for abandoning them? what if transformers had 100x the war crimes? what if the earth blew up. what if we were the robots all along?"

d) little girls out here writing like "aunt melanie's skin was sloughing off the bones as her beloved dogs tore her apart, turning on her in blind animal instinct. the second she stopped providing food, she became food." and a lot of body horror and dark themes about group pacts and betrayals and ritualistic murder/sacrifices. like a lot

[strongermonster]

me, turning to the teacher who is also doing this: hey so, i'm personally really cool with the tone and direction these girls take, but is any of this? how you say... a red flag?

teacher: little girls have really rich inner lives to combat the way they're puppeted by society in real life. they'll learn to censor it out in a couple years, but it doesn't go away.

me, who was also a weird little girl who phased in and out of weirdness depending on social settings: nice.

[celebrateeachnewday]

Artist Jane Crowther

[gobloggirl]

[punksalmons]

[argumate]

LLM psychosis is simply the democratisation of being surrounded by yes-men and unctuous toadies, an experience previously only accessible to dictators and kings and cult leaders and venture capitalists

[oeing-oeing-clay]

wow dude jts so awesome that your car is loud as fuck and smells worse when it drives past. thags fucking epic man. i really like how it hurts to listen to you drive past and it scares people. thats awesome man. i really like your car that makes a loud as fuck fart sound. fucking epic dude