Taken....for Granted

"I AM HERE, QUEER, AND FULL OF EXISTENTIAL FEAR” | Lix | 22 | TW: Depression, Emotional/Physical Abuse/Neglect, PTSD | | Needs help recovering | | We’re never gonna be ok, are we? | | Main account: @maesziel |

[sandmandaddy69]

[prettypinkpansy]

rare vent art from a few months ago

[queer-and-longing]

I feel this!!! Also love how you muted the color along the way, I think it makes it that much more impactful!

[saint-yaint]

This is the thing!

[cal-is-a-cuddlefish]

[meepmoopmaap]

[mimikyuser]

faun responders when there's nothing they can do to make everyone less upset;

[artemisvexing]

[atomicwrongs]

A room called ‘The Doll Room’ that’s full of dolls is… mundane.

But a room called ‘The Doll Room’ that only has one doll in it? That’s fresh

[atomicwrongs]

If a person shows you their Doll Room and it’s full of dolls, they probably just like dolls, y’know? It’s normal, it’s a hobby

But if they show you their Doll Room and it only has one doll… something’s going on with that one doll!

[fortidogi]

room called the doll room and theres a mirror and nothing else. the door closes

[furiousgoldfish]

we should fight child abuse at its roots not wait until children grow up and need life-long therapy

[juno-infernal]

Glen Martin Taylor, “but i am safe in here.”

[furiousgoldfish]

Recognizing Abuse Masterlist

Signs that you’re living in abuse:

Behavioral patterns of living in abuse

Was I abused? Checklist

Not knowing you are a victim

Signs your family is abusive

Making excuses for your abusive parents

Experience of living in secrecy

What they taught you was abuse

Emotional experiences of living in abuse

Shame and guilt: how abused children feel

What makes parents abusers (actions)

Have I been manipulated into believing abuse was my fault? Checklist

Am I being held hostage by abusers? Checklist

You are not allowed to mention the past

Why you still love abusive parents

Parental behaviour that isn’t normal

Shit parents aren’t supposed to say to you

Experience of “not belonging anywhere”

Red flags for abusive parents

Healthy vs Abusive Chores

Was my childhood abusive or just had some bad parts?

Rules always change (unpredictable environment is abusive)

Breakdown of abusive parent’s behaviour:

“This is my house” rule

Start living in the real life!

Why all the children aren’t abused equally in an abusive home

Common abuser hypocrisies

Do your parents want you to be happy or look happy?

Why do they try to convince you that you’re worthless

Why do they pretend you’re a burden? Controlling behaviour

Why your abusers are not good people

Abusive parents are keeping you in false hope they’ll change

Are your parents preventing you from succeeding?

Abusive parents pretending “it wasn’t that bad”

Double Bind (why every choice you make ends wrong)

Incorporating trauma in raising children

Abusers will not allow you to call them out on abuse

Signs your parents are narcissistic:

Stuff delusional narcissists say

Shit narcissistis parents say

Recognizing emotional immaturity of narcissistic parents

Examples of narcissistic behaviours

Being punished for growing up by narcissistic parents

What children of narcissists go thru

Signs you’ve been thru sexual abuse:

CSA (Childhood Sexual Abuse) Symptoms

Signs you might have endured CSA

Was I sexually abused by adults as a child? Checklist

Signs of abusive friendship/relationship:

How to tell if a friend is not a friend

Am I in an abusive relationship/friendship? Checklist

Manufacturing insecurities

Red flags for abusers

Have I been thru social abuse? Checklist

You can recognize abusers by how they make you feel

How abusive childhood teaches you to stay in abusive relationships

Recognizing abusive friendship

Signs you’re struggling with trauma

Trauma processing information

Experiences of traumatized children

Signs you’re recovering from long term abuse

Things abuse survivors think/say

Thoughts of victims of child abuse

Your brain on trauma

How long term childhood abuse develops into complex trauma (comic)

Ups and downs of trauma

[im-traumatised]

Why does my brain always have to put myself down by using other peoples issues. Hears one persons trauma and immediately i just hear over and over

"SEE YOU'RE NOT TRAUMATISED YOU'RE JUST A PATHETIC LITTLE SHIT THAT WANTS ATTENTION."

[heymrsamerica]

Absolutely this.

My mom kicked me out once in the FIFTH GRADE (over flour for an art project) and twice as a teenager.

The DAY the school year ended my sophomore year, and another time over the summer break.

The third time her ass had to practically beg me to come home, because I was enjoying myself with my sister.

These were acts of cruelty that will never be forgiven.

[healingchildhoodtrauma]

[healingchildhoodtrauma]

In the last year I’ve gone from, “wow I have no idea what’s wrong with me.. guess I’m just fucked up!!”

to “I’ve finally found an explanation for everything ... I actually have to pace myself in processing it because it’s so intense....”

[moodphasess]

I was really in charge of not triggering my mom when I was younger but she wouldn’t even try for me, it was always “I won’t walk on eggshells for you”. Like that’s not what I’m asking for, I literally just want you to understand my triggers that you probably created. But I, to this day, cannot joke around for example, she said something about 2012 and how it was a few years ago and I was like “damn a few years ago?” Obviously in a joking manner because I was literally 12 in 2012 so idk maybe it’s just funny to me? But her response is always “oh my god why do I always have to be so literal with you?” And she shuts down. Like excuse me you don’t I’m not literally correcting you I’m just joking but idk maybe that’s not funny.

[enjolrasofficial]

to understand why i have no self esteem, mommy issues and am a perfectionist you need to know that my mum keeps passive aggressively talking to no one when something goes wrong/she's upset/she wants somebody to help her and she always implies everything is someone else's fault while never saying that she's proud of anything

but when my cat steals a whole ass steak she tells her "awww no sweetheart..." in her baby voice and the next thing she says will 100% be "you're such a helpful little kid! so productive!"

[notyourjaan]

If you experienced trauma in childhood or had a rough childhood, dude listen to me. Offer yourself play. You were deprived of it.

Keep bubbles in the house, blow bubbles in the yard, blow them in your room, get a coloring book that doesn’t have to be an adult one with mandalas, watch cartoons, laugh at stupid things, dress up as a superhero for Halloween, wear a Santa hat on Christmas and big light up snowflake earrings, lay down on the floor, lay down in the grass, eat eggos for dinner sometimes. It’s not stupid. You’re not childish. You’re giving your inner child what they had taken from them. They deserve it.

[personal-scientist]

I don't want to derail this post because it's an important message, and OP has addressed it to the people who most need to hear it. But... can i just add, for people who don't feel like they can give themselves permission to do this, that you can give yourself these things even if you didn't overtly experience trauma in childhood?

Even if you never thought of your upbringing as painful or malicious, you can and should still give yourself things you missed out on. Take that class! Learn that skill! Eat the foods you like, or branch out into new ones! Jump in piles of leaves and decorate your walls the way you want them.

Give yourself the things you couldnt have as a kid, especially if you didn't really get to have a childhood, but even if you didn't have the childhood you wanted. Go for a bike ride with friends. Go stargazing. Whatever it was that you feel like you missed, it's important to seek those things and remember that play and joy aren't exclusive to childhood.

[notyourjaan]

I don’t think you derailed this at all and think this was a really thoughtful addition. So thank you!

[modernamami-deactivated20230110]

Im in fucking tears rn

[kayas-wife]

Even if you had the best childhood ever and you still like doing those things, do them. There are no rules, so why not enjoy yourself

[cant-make-you-love-me]

Im slowly, but surely, running out of reasons to live

[cosmic-dust-poltergeist]

I wish I got more hugs in rl. But my family wasn’t very tactile to begin with and got even less so each time I came out as something other than the “normal” hetero cis-female that they wanted me to be. I pretty much kissed hugs goodbye when I came out as ace and all other familiar contact when I came out as trans. That was three years ago so I’m a little touch starved. But I’d have no idea how to accept a hug from anyone if they offered.

(This fact kind of fucked up the date I went on.)