(likely) unpopular opinion: the fandom has oversanitized/domesticated Steve.
I've seen so many HCs, fanfics, etc. that seem to really amplify how attuned, "maternal," emotionally intelligent, respectful, etc. he is. And don't get me wrong, he is! His character has definitely undergone a lot of development, and he's grown a lot throughout the show.
At the same time, I feel like people tend to create this perfect, idealized version of him who would never get things wrong beyond being kinda goofy. Like he'd be the "mom" with a perfectly stocked diaper bag full of everything you'd ever need. Like he'd be the guy with impeccable softness. He'd be so emotionally informed, he's the poster child for modern-day-feminist-boyfriend/bestie. Like he'd be the guy making soup for sick friends with his apron on (and the soup would be good.) But let's get real: They'd have to ask for the soup, he'd ask too many questions, and then mess up the parts he tried to handle on his own.
He is a guy who has great intent and is doing his best, but he's far from the model-husband I think a lot of the fandom projects onto him.
Don't get me wrong! contextually, he is a standout for how far he's come, and what a good guy he becomes. But really, he's still just some fuckin guy in the 80s. This is not a time known for its nuanced understanding of evolving social concepts, domestic/emotional labor, etc. He's an ex-popular dude who fell in with a bunch of kids, (and did undergo some radical character development) but that doesn't exactly make him the world's best mom. These kids regularly outsmart and run him. He's still a "himbo" in many a scenario, which is an aspect of his character we have all enjoyed, but is often forgotten.
In S2, even while he's "babysitting" all the kids and trying to keep them safe and in line, he's more "in tow" than he is in charge. Yes, he fights Billy to protect them. But also yes, they then take care of him, and take the reins on the plans themselves.
In S4, when exploring the abandoned Creel house, he literally pulls a peak manchild moment- This guy didn't think to bring a flashlight, comments on it, and even Dustin shades him, saying something along the lines of "Do you have to be told everything? You're not a child."
In S5, he and Dustin are starting shit with each other constantly. Steve says plenty of things that are a far cry from Fandom-Steve's caring, nurturing, and emotionally intelligent demeanor. Not to mention him still telling Nancy about his family fantasy involving her when he knew they were "never in the cards." Fandom Steve would never! That could make her uncomfortable or be presumptuous.
I feel like if we had Fandom Steve in Robin's coming out scene, he wouldn't have roasted her choice in women, he'd have been like "I'm sorry, I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable with my own feelings." But no! This is a man who is gonna banter and say dumb shit and that is what we love about him!
Again, yes, he has gone through some great change, and is clearly a wonderful dude with a good heart. but it's kinda wild to see how the fandom portrays him vs. how he actually is in the show. He'd likely still be making mistakes and having dumbass moments. Being an 80s hetero white dude who is less than wise and graceful at times. And even so, I love him anyway! It's what makes his character imperfectly human and enjoyable to watch.
